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#this is literally general grievous
sunflowerrex · 1 year
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Cracked out sketchbook things
Ashamed to announce: I am back on my bullshit
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I shall post the finished piece bc it’s gonna be fucken FUNNY
Update: I love my sketchbook shenanigans
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izzystizzys · 2 months
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TW: discussion of something approximating suicidal tendencies but with the usual crack programming of this blog
“Ah, High General Windu”, says Fox, pleasantly. “So we meet again.”
High General Windu raises an unimpressed eyebrow at him, Fox thinks, though it’s getting hard to tell with all the blood rushing to his head. “If I let you go, will you try to throw yourself out of another window?”
Fox makes a vague shrugging motion - or tries to, anyways. It’s hard to tell where any of his limbs are going, hanging upside down in the air as he is. “I am willing to discuss terms.” A bridge will do just fine.
Impossibly, the High General’s eyebrows climb even further up his forehead. “A compromise, then, esteemed Commander.” And so, he righths Fox the head way up in the air, but leaves him floating just above the ground, at which point several painted shells come skidding around the corner followed by billowing robes and screeches.
“WHAT”, says Kote, calmly, “THE BANTHA-KARKED, FORCE-LOVING KRIFF, FOX.”
“You’ll short out your helmet mic”, Fox advises him, sagely. Fondly, he thinks back to decimating his own on only his second time in the newly-christened official Coruscant Guard Scream Closet. He’d just received the comm about the Zillo Beast being transported to 000, and made sure to take his bucket off thereafter to improve the quality of his closet time.
High General Windu’s face does something complicated between sympathy and constipation.
Because the Galaxy doesn’t hate Fox enough already and Cody wasn’t enough on his own, Wolffe elbows his way through their batch to plant himself in front of him, shoulders squared and shaking with repressed rage. “If you try that again, dickhead”, he begins, in a low growl that quite frankly sounds more cringe that intimidating, “I’m going to resurrect you and then kill you again.”
“Ah, Wolffe”, Plo Koon says, in his deep, shivery timbre, “Remember our conversations about effective conflict resolution and communication of needs?”
Wolffe’s eyes narrow at Fox, because all non-Guard are sweet summer children who walk around buckets off on 000 like absolute lunatics. Fox prays they never have to find out why that’s a bad idea. “I feel”, his ori’vod presses out between clenched teeth, “that if you make me watch you throw yourself out of another window, I’m going to jump after you and strangle you on the way down, you little bitch.”
“That’s fair”, says Fox, and watches High General Kenobi bury his face in his hands. Wolffe twitches in place and makes an aborted groaning noise, the hypocrite.
“Excuse me, High Marshall Commander Fox, but I fail to see what’s so dire about this situation that the Jedi High Council and your brothers cannot help you solve”, says Windu, the only sane one left on this Force-forsaken bloated corpse of a planet. Behind the gaggle of Jedi and ori’vode already gathered in front of Fox, the rest of them come veering around the corner in a commotion that’s quite frankly embarrassing. High General Yoda is mounted on Skywalker’s back like he’s a race-Eopie, which is Fox’ only consolation.
He got up this morning at 0300, bleary-eyed and with a pounding headache as always, and all was right in the world. And then Fox got called into the Jedi High Council’s chambers and was ceremoniously informed that in the wake of Chancellor Palpatine’s unfortunate demise (hah), and through the emergency state of the Senate, as well as several invented promotions foisted on Fox to make the delegation of any and all paperwork less shady, he was now next in the chain of command and-
Well, Fox is the acting Chancellor, in short.
Haha, he had said, and been meet with several seconds of silence, until it got both awkward and exceedingly painful. Wait, he’d said. You’re kriffing serious.
Kriffing serious, we are, had said High General Yoda, and thus Fox launched himself out the first best window with a maniacal cackle of, you’ll have to catch me first!
And catch him, High General Windu sure did.
“The will of the Force this is”, Yoda interrupts Fox’ train of thought. He scans him thoughtfully from beneath his wizened brow, and hems to himself. “Shake things up, this will. Determine the fate of the Galaxy, this shall. A feeling, I have, that a good Chancellor you will make. A better one, hmmm.”
“That’d be high praise, if not for the fact that a dead lemming would make for a better Chancellor than the last one”, says Fox, drawing and indignant gasp from Skywalker. He doesn’t bother with either that or the green goblin’s cackle, lost in the deep sense of resignation that settles over his shoulders like a suffocating blanket.
“Alright, then, get me Thorn on the comm. As my first act in office, I’m firing all the Jedi. No offense, but you’re kind of a disaster. Then, someone get me to the Chancellor’s office, I’m calling Dooku to let him know the war’s off. And please get me Judicial, they’ll be up all night working on my datafolders - I’m having the Senate arrested.”
“Who - is - arresting - “, Bly pants, hands on his knees from where he’s just come sprinting around the corner with his Jedi.
Underneath his bucket, Fox smiles a smile that’s all teeth. “The Senate”, he says, sweetly, wondering if he’s just imagined the shiver that’s gone through the room. “I’m suing the Senate, and taking them all into temporary custody for abuse of sentient rights.”
#commander fox#corrie guard deserves better#sw tcw fic idea#look fox has been planning this coup for a while okay he just needed to adjust and get over the initial reaction of Fuck No#if they’re sentient enough for their signatures to have authoritative quality on military reports and to be promoted to chancellor on a#technicality then they’re sentient enough for everything to be victims of systemic oppression and abuse#fox still does not want this position and will yeet it the literal second bail organa isn’t watching his step religiously#a custody battle ensues between Corries and GAR ori’vode for who grts to tackle him (affectionate)#it is solved by getting a bigger room so they can all do it at once#thorn makes a point of jamming his elbow in some soft places. cody and co are disgruntled but accepting of this#he has a bit of a point admittedly and wolffe has to promise not to threaten murder again#plo makes him go to another Effective Interpersonal Communication Seminar (it’s the fifth that year)#anakin is initially outraged on padme’s behalf but she could literally not be happier#fully supportive of being arrested in the name of Fox’ Good#we can still do book club though right she asks. visiting hours don’t apply to chancellor probably#fox shrugs. it’s his next act as chancellor#count dooku: live slug reaction#the systemic issues fuelling the war cannot be solved with a phone call but in absence of someone with two braincells to rub together#the whole thing loses steam and strategy steadily#look it was always a sham that house of cards of a republic/confederacy was waiting to be blown over by literally any light breeze#general grievous implodes from pure rage. legend has it his last word was KENOBAAYYYYY. wipes away tear#thorn laughs so hard when he hears all this he cracks a rib#another day another post of utter nonsense#ponds makes sure to give his fox’ika a hug as soon as he’s floated down bcs ponds is the best#which is why he didn’t get it in the last ficlet for anyone wondering#the only functional one#much like mace windu
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clu-ven · 5 months
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your honor, he slayed
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krenhuff · 6 months
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the most sane reaction I was capable of producing:
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soath · 30 days
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also now that last bit is up, i'll say it. i think asmodeus should take time out of his very busy day to try to zerxus-ify amaris. a beleaguered, confused now-widower who his everpatient sister loves so very much? who got to raise his sanctimonious brother from childhood, see him bright and unaware in a way none of them have been since the dawn of time? unacceptable. if you think about it, asmodeus has to torment him. if only to draw a line in the sand. mortals can't start thinking they can get away with that sort of behavior (loving the people he loves when he wasn't there).
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stoobmatic · 2 years
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grievous experiences major episodes of body dysmorphia following battles in which he's forced to acknowledge his physical state. just a (sad) thought.
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p4nishers · 2 years
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remember obi wan kenobi?? man was he gay
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hotpinkboots · 2 years
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Was bored so made I made some Star Wars Prequels memes to pass the time
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clonememesfrikyeah · 2 years
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General Grievous: “We will decimate you, and you shall weep as our army cuts you down like wheat in a field. Your trodden upon corpses will water the ground so death and despair can grow in its wake, you will beg for mercy but none will come. We will pound down your defenses until they are dust and you will lose this war! The separatist ways shall dominate the galaxy and you will be a slave to it, republic scum!”
Rex: “Sounds kinky, but I’m good for now, maybe later though.” *fires bazooka straight into Grievous’s face.*
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oreolesbian · 1 year
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does… does dave filoni know that the whole “anyone can be force sensitive if they put their mind to it” bullshit fundamentally shatters the entire core of star wars world-building around force users? like - does he understand that?
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a-menaceinpink · 2 years
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i have literally no idea if this is what the directors intended, however the cyborg thing in the new episode of the mandalorian gave me MAJOR general grievous vibes (his little cgi suit was animated to move just like in the clone wars, the eye looks the same, etc) and like. hypothetically speaking could it be just another being of the same species as grievous? entirely possible however this is dave filoni so it would be grievous. ("somehow palpatine survived" type bs)
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izzystizzys · 2 months
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“…I’m sorry, but I’m afraid I still don’t quite understand”, Fox says, for what must be the dozenth time that hour. His heartbeat pounds behind his eyes in an incessant drum of hurt, and his head aches with every breath like someone’s taken a rusty fork to the inside of his skull and raked his brain out. Fox’ eyes are beginning to burn the way they start doing around hour 80 of a shift, and he has to suppress the brief urge to check over his shoulder. Not even Stabby could come up with a ploy this contrived to make him sleep. Probably.
In front of him, General Grievous coughs awkwardly, long spindly durasteel limbs shivering with its force. “Certainly”, he vocalizes, in that deep, watery cadence. “For your glorious triumphs in battle, your awe-inspiring victory over me in close combat, and your undeniable warrior spirit, I accept you as my consort. I have proven my skills through the ritual capture, and thus, by Kaleesh custom, we are now wed, Commander Fox. I will honor you as my war-bride, and visit vengeance upon your enemies. I swear it to you.”
Expectantly, Grievous tilts his faceplate to the side, and Fox only just catches the suppression of the manic giggle that wants to escape him. Yeah, probably not Stabby - maybe a dying fever dream? Has the infected gash from that skirmish on the lower levels five rotations ago finally decided to end him? If so, it’s not fast enough for Fox’ tastes.
Here’s how it happened: Fox has no kriffing clue. All he knows is one moment an emergency alert tore him from precious Scream Closet time this morning, he went to rescue the Chancellor’s dumb ass again, and whoop, here he is on General Grievous’ ship with the war-criminal himself declaring them happily married. And eyeing him up and down like a piece of candy.
Why, Fox thinks, desperately, does this always have to happen to me?!
Chancellor’s still kidnapped, by the way. Fox has other priorities for the time being.
“I swear to aim my weapons in your service”, Grievous continues, when it becomes exceedingly clear Fox is not going to break out of his shocked stupor anytime soon. “I swear to aim true and strike with murderous intent, I swear to uphold the sacred bonds of our clans in the name of our union, I swear to raise a strong, bloodthirsty brood of warriors with-“
“Wait”, Fox interrupts, once his brain has caught up past the astromech dial-up sound it seems to be playing on repeat. “Uphold clan bonds? You murder your way through my brothers like a rabid nexu on spice on the regular!”
Grievous’ faceplate, which should be for all intents and purposes totally expressionless, does something that reminds Fox strangely of contrition. It has him gaping and shivering in discomfort, in any case. “A fact I regret, but acknowledge lies in my past before the fateful crossing of our paths. I am a warrior at soul, you must understand, my worthy mate.” Durasteel faceplates don’t turn soft. They don’t. And coughs don’t sound loving. They simply do not. “But I uphold the bonds of these sacred vows under Kaleesh law, that I swear to you, my beloved.”
“All I did was grapple you to the ground”, Fox says, mourningly. “Cody has kicked you in the head dozens of times and you’ve never tried to marry him.”
“He is not you, and his battle lacks the lustful vitality and love of violence of yours”, Grievous declares, and Fox really cannot tell whether the sound that erupts from him is a lovelorn sigh or a hacking death-gurgle. This cannot be his life.
Just then, a droid conveniently enters, putting a pause to all Fox’ sufferings. He’ll need to tell Thorn to research Kaleesh divorce proceedings. Or, better yet - he needs to blow up this whole karking ship including himself and destroy all evidence of this ever happening.
“Generals Kenobi and Skywalker awaiting in custody, Sir”, says the droid, nervously. “They are here to rescue Chancellor Palpatine, but we cut them off just out of the hangar bay.”
Internally, Fox rolls his eyes so hard it hurts his brain. “The Jedi can wait”, Grievous hacks out, and for once Fox agrees with him. Let the two dick around onboard, there’s bigger issues at hand.
“But Sir”, says the droid, all twitchy with an anxiety Fox eternally wonders who the kriff programmed into the damn things, “what if they try to escape and -“
A deep, growling noise erupts from deep within Grievous’ massive metal chest, amplifying Fox’ pounding headache by a thousandfold. “I have no time for this”, he snarls at the cowering droid. “Remove yourself from my and mine beloved’s sight.”
“Roger Roger”, the B2 squeaks, hesitantly, before adding on - “The Chancellor-“
Harrumphing petulantly, Grievous stomps one massive, clawed foot and makes what feels like the whole viewdeck shake. “I will twist his head off his body like a rotten fruit”, he declares. “That will get those pesky Jedi off my ship faster, and then we can continue saying our vows.” He pauses, thoughtfully, and then hooded eyes ringed by what must surely be rotten flesh fix on Fox inexorably. “It will be my wedding gift to you, beloved, an offering of peace to your brothers.”
Fox opens his mouth to protest, but quickly snaps it shut again when his husband already turns tail and storms off.
Huh. Maybe this marriage thing isn’t all bad.
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kenobiskata · 2 years
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𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑 𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐒: 𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐄𝐒𝐈𝐒
“𝐖𝐚𝐫 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬𝐧’𝐭 𝐝𝐞𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐢𝐬 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭, 𝐢𝐭 𝐝𝐞𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐬 𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐢𝐬 𝐥𝐞𝐟𝐭.”
ੈ✩‧₊˚ The Galactic Republic has been slowly poisoned by greed and corruption for decades. Perhaps even longer. When a government is both feeble and ineffectual, its society is as well. That is why in its current state, under the rule of Chancellor Sella Praji, the galaxy is stagnant, dying a slow, terrible death. The hard-pressed Jedi Order has too few knights to effectively combat the poison, which is why crime rates are at an all time high.
A war looms on the horizon, one that has the potential to consume every being, every planet, every solar system. If no one intervenes, there will be nothing left . . .
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https://discord.gg/QVFP2wHg2r
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wileycap · 2 months
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PALPATINE: My dear boy. The only thing that we are discussing right now is what you want.
ANAKIN: Hm. Okay, world peace for Padmé, a Best Jedi mug for Obi-Wan - no, that's not me being bitchy, he literally will not accept a bigger gift...
PALPATINE: Yes, you shall have it all. Just -
ANAKIN: Oh, I'm not done. A billion... no, you know what, a trillion credits for Ahsoka, rights for the clones plus backpay and overtime for the war, full rights to their own genetic code, a special vode-only tribune that will investigate Kaminoans and natborn officers for sentient rights violations...
PALPATINE:
ANAKIN: ... slavery is to be abolished across the galaxy, I and any vode who want to join me will be sanctioned by the Republic to hunt down slavers, starting with Tatooine, hair cream for Windu - okay, that one is me being bitchy - and, well, I guess I'd want a fleet of the absolute best ships for me. As a treat.
PALPATINE: I see. Are you done?
ANAKIN: I guess. How soon can you deliver?
PALPATINE: Well. As it stands... it might... take some time.
ANAKIN: That's cool. You can get all the legal stuff done tomorrow, just call in a special session of the Senate, but I get that commissioning a fleet will take some time. I didn't even give you a list of models or anything.
PALPATINE: ... yes. I can't help but to think that you're disregarding your wife's safety here.
ANAKIN: Oh, no. I'm being smart.
PALPATINE: You are?
ANAKIN: Yup. Padmé is a completely healthy woman. Her pregnancy is very low risk. So, if she's going to die in childbirth, it's got to have something to do with the war, right? If we end the war, there's no danger to Padmé.
PALPATINE: Have you forgotten what I told you about Darth Plagueis the Wise?
ANAKIN: No, but if I use Sith Magic to save her, she's probably going to turn into a zombie or something. Trust me, Chancellor, I've seen it before.
PALPATINE: I'm afraid to ask, but where have you seen zombies?
ANAKIN: Eh, you can check my mission reports. Anyways, if you just hand me your credit chit, I can get to buying Obi-Wan that mug, giving Ahsoka the trillion and all that.
PALPATINE: Well, I...
ANAKIN: And if you don't want to go through with this, I'm definitely going to murder you right now. You being a Sith Lord and all that.
PALPATINE: Oh.
ANAKIN: Yeah.
PALPATINE: Well, here's my credit chit.
ANAKIN: Thanks, Sheev! Just one more question. What are you getting out of this?
PALPATINE: ... I'm going to declare myself Emperor and bring about the age of the Sith.
ANAKIN: Okay, that's cool.
PALPATINE: It... is?
ANAKIN: Sure. I mean, you basically are an emperor already, and we have freedom of religion. Just make sure that your Empire is strictly democratic, or else Padmé's going to be mad at me.
PALPATINE: I... what? The purpose of an Empire is to do away with democracy! Cut away the rot of bureaucracy!
ANAKIN: Chancellor, do you remember the conversation we had just now about me murdering you?
PALPATINE: Yes, but you hate the Republic too!
ANAKIN: I know, but work stuff can't come between me and Padmé. One of the rules of a successful marriage. Anyways, get it done. I gotta go buy a mug and some hair cream.
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BREAKING NEWS!
PEACE! Supreme Chancellor / Emperor-Elect Sheev Palpatine has announced the immediate cessation of hostilities between the Republic and the CIS along with a slew of other groundbreaking proposals. The Supreme Chancellor stated that with the death of General Grievous...
The Coruscant Herald spoke with Jedi Master Obi-Wan Kenobi, also known as the Negotiator.
"I've got this mug." said Master Kenobi, before launching into a protracted rant about the state of our democracy.
"I got back from Utapau, and Anakin tells me that he 'kind of' turned to the Dark Side. How do you 'kind of' turn? But now we have galactic peace. But we also have an Emperor. Well, in three days we will have an Emperor. But the Emperor is going to have less power than the Supreme Chancellor has right now, and they're the same person. Not to mention that he's the Sith. My entire life has turned into a philosophical nightmare on whether the ends justify the means, and it's all being personified by this blasted mug." ...
Senator Padmé Amidala of Naboo had a brief conversation with the Herald.
"Well, I think of it like a retirement present. A lifetime achievement award. He is an older man, and no doubt he'll abdicate in due time. This will be an interesting footnote in the history of the Republic." ...
Spokesbeing for the Shmi Skywalker Foundation, Anakin Skywalker spoke at length with our reporter.
"Well, we at the Shmi Skywalker Foundation offer only two things: freedom to slaves and death to slavers. And sometimes imprisonment to slavers, because Obi-Wan and Padmé were pretty adamant about that. And also financial aid, legal aid, housing, therapy, et cetera. For the freed people. So I guess we offer more than two things, but they're all good things."
"Sheev? Sheev is great. A nice old man. I think he's going to abdicate in, oh, three years or so? [Editor's Note: Transcript is garbled due to the Emperor-Elect coughing suddenly.] [...Yo]u need a glass of water, Sheev? Get him - yeah, one of you red guys, get him a glass of water. You're not a young man anymore, Sheev. Yeah, I think he'll abdicate within three years."
Emperor-Elect Sheev Palpatine declined to comment at this time.
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babyloniastreasure · 1 year
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Enkidu FGO is absolutely a troublemaker. Enkidu Source Material was also absolutely a troublemaker, but of course he was! He was literally created to be the equal to the #1 Mesopotamian troublemaking king, Gilgamesh. It's basically a requirement
I see it from time to time, but there's an opinion that Enkidu was killed in the Epic because he was a troublemaker. This is not true, but easy to understand why it's a popular conclusion
The decision to kill Enkidu was made after he and Gilgamesh made some glaringly poor choices--the first one being the slaying of Humbaba, and the second the slaying of Gugalana. I think people attribute the reason Enkidu was killed instead of Gilgamesh to Enkidu's actions after Gugalana was killed, which something I will get to in a moment. It might be different in Fate, and depending on what version of the epic you read some details differ, but generally here's what went down
Gilgamesh one day gets the idea that he and Enkidu should go into the Cedar forest and kill its guardian, the monster Humbaba. Now, wood was a very sacred and rare material in ancient Mesopotamia, cedar wood in particular. Hence why the gods had such a powerful monster keeping it safe. Gilgamesh goes to Enkidu with his grand idea to hunt down and kill Humbaba, but he needs Enkidu's help to find him. Enkidu is very hesitant at first and tells Gilgamesh the equivalent of, "Dude that's a terrible idea. Humbaba is extremely powerful. Absolutely Not." Gilgamesh urges Enkidu to reconsider, because together they can survive anything! It'll be easy with the two of us and it'll be so much fun!
Enkidu is eventually persuaded and agrees, and together they track down and kill Humbaba, as well as his seven sons. They worship/thank the gods by sacrificing Humbaba-meat to a fire (as ya do), and they cut down a RIDICULOUS AMOUNT OF CEDAR while they're at it, then sail home down the Euphrates on a newly carved boat and a bunch of extra wood. Needless to say, The Gods Were Not Pleased.
But since this was King Gilgamesh and Enkidu, they chose to simply take note of this transgression and not do anything to punish them so long as they didn't do something equally grievous in the future.
Fast forward a bit and Ishtar is upset that Gilgamesh doesn't want to sleep with her. Gilgamesh heavily insults her, naming off dozens of her past lovers and how she treated them, driving her to tears. She goes up to the heavens and pitches a fit to her father, Anu, about the rejection. She threatens to raise zombies all over Mesopotamia unless he gives her the Bull of Heaven (Gugalana) to lay siege to Uruk in vengeance against Gilgamesh. Sending out this divine beast is a HUGE deal, not a decision to make lightly. However, Anu doesn't want zombies. He gives her the Bull.
Ishtar immediately sends it down to Uruk where it promptly kills a BUNCH of people and causes a heap of environmental disasters. Enkidu fights it off alone for a while, but it isn't until Gilgamesh joins the fight that they are able to take it down. Gilgamesh makes the final blow, killing him, and with Gugalana defeated the kingdom celebrates victory. They worship/thank the gods by sacrificing Gugalana-meat to a fire, and Ishtar shows up again. She is very upset that Gugalana was slain. How DARE you two kill the Bull of Heaven? She says. Do you have any idea how important that was? She says. Enkidu responds by insulting her and throws a chunk of the meat from Gugalana's hind at her head. She is humiliated and goes back up to the heavens. I think this is where people get the idea that Enkidu was a troublemaker, and that this was why he was chosen over Gilgamesh to die. However. It is not. Once again, The Gods Were Not Pleased. Gilgamesh and Enkidu are out of control. They call a meeting.
Gilgamesh and Enkidu, as a pair, had:
Slain two divine beasts (which they knew the importance of)
Cut down a sacred forest (which they knew the importance of)
Heavily insulted the same goddess to her face. The patron deity of the kingdom, no less!
Three major transgressions! But the most concerning ones were the deaths of Humbaba and Gugalana, and were the primary discussion at the god-meeting. The others are bonuses.
The gods decide the fitting punishment is death. However, killing both Gilgamesh and Enkidu is too severe and must choose one.
Now there's no literal written reason for Enkidu being chosen. But looking back on the Epic as a whole, we can infer the reason he was...is Gilgamesh.
Enkidu was created by the gods to rein Gilgamesh in, to control him. Gilgamesh on his own was unruly, unchecked, overpowering and selfish. By giving him Enkidu, he had someone he could be unruly with, who would check him, who could match his power and balance his needs. Enkidu was literally made to be his perfect match, and thus he became the most important thing in the whole world to Gilgamesh. Some might say that Gilgamesh's wanton disregard was rubbing off on Enkidu, or that Enkidu's unwavering loyalty and support was making Gilgamesh overconfident, and that he was killed because he was no longer fulfilling his purpose. However, I do not think that's the reason, either.
There's this neat thing in Mesopotamian literature and poetry where the theme of the work appears again and again. Prose is often repeated, whole stanzas are recycled over and over, words and the way grammar is used, and lines are reused in patterns. Very often, a work begins and ends the same way. The Epic of Gilgamesh is a shining example of this and does it constantly. So,
Just like in the beginning of the Epic, in order for the gods to rein Gilgamesh in, they use Enkidu.
--
TLDR; Enkidu was not killed because he was a trouble maker. By killing both Humbaba and Gugalana, both he and Gilgamesh were in trouble but only one of them needed to die as punishment. Enkidu was chosen because he was created to control Gilgamesh--both through his life and through his death.
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dearanakin · 4 months
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trust you | anakin skywalker: episode V
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Summary: You go on a mission with Cal... and Anakin. You have a task as a tech engineer, but dealing with General Grievous and his army of droids can be challenging. Ps: There's a character guest in this chapter, remember it doesn't follow the actual timeline of the franchise!!
No warnings, just vulgar language (a lot of it because it's a mission and they're all on the verge of flipping out lol)
Word count: 4.7k
*
(Y/N):
I'm not sure I even had the option to actually deny the offer Cal made. To be honest, he practically begged me and forced me to agree on going with him and his team to a trade with someone with a weird name.
Worst of it all, I had to be their tech guy for the mission. A mission led by none other than Anakin. I wish I could actually have had a choice, because I sure wasn't expecting to see his face this soon.
Especially after he literally threatened me the other day. I don't think I've ever felt this scared in my life. We all know the guy has a temper and he doesn't follow any rules. As much as we all hoped he would change through the years, it seems like it's getting worse instead.
Now I'm sitting next to Cal in his ship, while Artoo is on top of it. He seemed a little distressed, he doesn't show off his emotions a lot because he knows I get worried. But I know after what happened that day he's not getting along with Anakin.
I mean, who would at this point? He looks at you like he's about to rip your eyes out.
And I know Cal didn't want to look like he's only on this mission because of the team itself. He told me he didn't want to collaborate this time, which only made the Jedi Master walk around with a deadly look on his face.
But the redhead never felt intimidated by him in any way. Or at least he doesn't show it. As far as I know, we're heading to General Grievous' spaceship. I feel like I've heard this name before, but I can't collect it.
"So, what's the plan? Leaving me trapped in here with R2?" I ask as he maneuvers into outer pace, a concentrated look on his face as he does so.
He chuckles with dramatic concern. "You'll be looking out for us with commander Poe Dameron first" Cal explains as I nod. Who is Poe Dameron, by the way?
"He's a Jedi as well?" He shakes his head in response. "He's... not?"
Okay, that concerned me. I'm only used to being around force sensitive people, and being a human already scared me enough. Now, knowing I'm going to be around another human makes me wonder whatever happens if we get attacked.
"Nope, but he's a good Resistance's Starfighter Corps member. And a good pilot" He gives me a smile as he turns his head to face me. He can read my panic plastered all over my face and reaches out his hand to grab mine. "We're gonna need you there to break into their system".
So, we'll watch as the trade unfolds and hope for the best first. Do I agree with that? I didn't, but I had no choice but to help them.
"And if something happens, before he drops you there, he'll bring you back to Coruscant" Cal shoots his head back forward as we approach the starship.
Yeah, simple as that, right? If something happens, like, we'll just go back and live it out. Doesn't seem too tragic for me, I love the adrenaline.
Not.
We landed on a hangar, Cal preparing himself up before leaving me out here with only a Droid and a man named Poe. I hope this guy isn't a douchebag like Skywalker is, I won't be able to run away from him if I wanted to.
He gives me a small kiss on the forehead before leaving the ship, sending me a half smile before meeting the others already in formation. I watch as a brunette man walks towards from where the redhead just left and waves back to the others.
He has wavy dark hair, as well as dark brown eyes, and a stubble. Damn, this man looks fine as hell.
Poe steps in and sits down on the seat next to me, looking right up with a kind smile on his face. He finishes buckling himself before introducing himself to me, while I still glance at him like he just came out of a Disney movie.
"Hi, I'm Dameron. Well, Poe Dameron but they call me by my last name since I'm a commander" He explains, extending his hand for a greeting. I grip his hand for a few seconds before releasing.
Good handshake, firm and gentle. What am I even saying at this point?
"You're (Y/N), right?" I nod as he looks back at the panel, starting the ship.
"Yes, I am. It's nice to meet you" I say for the first time, feeling like I have never met anybody that gorgeous.
"Likewise. So, you're an engineer? You fix everything?" Poe asks, concentrating on lifting the flight.
"Well, mostly prosthetics and spacecraft. They're already too much to handle most of the time. But I can manage computers and systems as well"
"You were responsible for creating the robotic arm General Skywalker has?" He seems interested in what I do for my living and it kinda distracts me from the mission we were on.
I wish I could not hear this name on a daily basis.
"You know him?" I didn't mean to sound too surprised, but my voice gave it away anyway. "And not really, I usually fix it for him".
Yeah, and the last time I did it he almost got killed and that led to me almost getting killed as well.
"We've been out and about on a few assignments. I'm mostly doing tasks for the Resistance, leading attacks and all that" He sets the ship on standby as we watch from a distance while the group of Jedi gets in the Trade Federation Starship.
"Are you never scared of doing these dangerous jobs being human?" I ask out of curiosity, it gives me such a bad feeling being out for work like this.
He looks at me and grins. How can someone be so good looking like that? This is so distracting. "Kinda get used to it at some point, I chose this life".
I just nod and stare back at the distance. We both had comlink for communication, R2 looking out for any threats as well. I shuffle uncomfortably on my seat, desperate to be done with this mission. Poe notices my discomfort and rests a hand over my shoulder.
"You're going to be fine, they'll protect you at all costs and we'll be on full alert from afar. That's why we have other starships in position" He tries to comfort me and gives me a nod.
It doesn't change anything about this assignment, we all know how difficult they can be.
My sweaty hands grab my duffel bag and I look over the tools I brought with me. I hope this shitty idea works, because I can't be bothered to feel bad for failing their job.
A few minutes later, which seemed like hours, Cal spoke over the comlink and Poe promptly shifted the gears and flew back to the starship. As we land, I see him next to another General all while waiting for me. My nerves are on edge and I feel like I'm gonna fucking throw up.
Before I leave, Poe gives me a sympathetic look and offers a handshake. "May the Force be with you" He says kindly.
"May the Force be with you, commander" I force a smile that might have come out as a grimace and follow along with the other guys.
Cal stands next to me as we enter the enormous vessel, full of bodyguards and droids. He ignites his lightsaber and gets closer to my ear.
"We're close to the vents that lead to this small control room. We'll have to get into their system and gather as much information as we can" He whispers, walking me through a small hallway.
He and the other Jedi stop on their tracks and immediately drop both of the droids standing there. Cal turns on his heels and approaches me, handing me a blaster gun. One I was supposed to carry around but am too fucking scared to do it.
"You might wanna use it this time" He reaches out for a pocket knife strapped on his ankle and offers it to me as well. "I didn't say you'll have to. Just for self-defense".
He glances up at me with a tender look on his face. This man gives his life to protect me and I'd do the same if I could. I mean, I do but not the same way he does of course.
I just nod at everything he says and we look up at the vent. I'm not doing this alone, am I?
If I had a dollar for everytime he uses his force for mind reading, I would be such a rich person right now. "I'm going with you" He adds.
Getting in a vent with a duffel bag is probably one of the worst scenarios I never thought about. We were dragging our bodies while he tried to drag the bag without making much noise, but obviously not being very cautious with the tools, the gears and other objects in there. We get to the room, me behind Cal as he shoots his blaster against the soldiers. I can't feel my legs at this point, and it's not even because we're in such a small space.
He drops on his feet first, glancing around the room, before looking up at me. He shoots both arms up, waiting for me to jump in as well. I don't know how I was able to pull a stunt like that since I'm afraid of heights. And I mean 8 feet is already too much for me. Cal grabs my hips and slowly puts me down, a large smile on his face.
"There you go, James Bond!" He mocks, arching his back as I swat him on the chest.
"Shut up, smartass" I can barely speak as I feel my voice falter from the stress and the adrenaline.
He walks over a large control panel, hundreds of different colored buttons and keys. They have pretty much a huge system for such a small room. I mean, if there's a bigger room then this is just a gist. First things first, I had to disable the security camera before someone came bursting into the door. I sit on the big chair and Cal leans against the desk next to me. I'm sure he has no idea what the hell I'm doing. I use a small device to hack into the system and quickly find the program to the security camera. 
They clearly need a better safety system, because it's too easy to get into their computer. Either that, or it's a trap. But I'd rather believe they're just that stupid. I turn off the cameras, both of us making sure they're all shut down.
Next, I type in a few things on the keyboard, trying to find what exactly they need. Cal uses his pointer finger to make sure he's looking for the right folder, carefully reading every single word on the screen. "We need strategies folders, every spacecraft and architecture project. List of trades and traders they use".
He said it like he was writing down a fucking grocery shopping list.
I try not to send him a glare or even look at him like I'm pissed. So I just go straight to the point. "Might as well just wipe out the entire computer, Kestis. This might take hours!".
"You can just add them to the device you have?" I swear to God, he can't be that serious.
"You're smart, Cal. Use your head. How big do you think these files are? They're all programs, it's a heavy stack of files" I start to get freaked out with the idea of being there for too long.
"Okay, right I'm sorry if I'm a newbie at technology" He adds dramatically. "Can you just drag the list and the strategies folders then?".
I move the mouse right away, bringing everything to my device, waiting for the system to calculate the estimated time. I can't help but tap my fingernails over the desk while I wait for it. Cal doesn't seem too worried like I am, as though he carries a very serious look on his face.
"We've been in for ten minutes. We probably still have a good half an hour left" He says, still leaning next to me, looking at the watch on his wrist.
"Considering this ship can blow up when we least expect it, I don't think it's good" I look at him like I'm not feeling well. He reaches my right arm and folds his big hand around it, giving it a light squeeze.
"We'll know before it happens, darling" Cal reassures me as his hand goes up and down on my arm in a comforting attempt.
Fifteen fucking minutes. I'm gonna throw myself off the ship. He uses his comlink to let the others know, which they all agree. For the first time, Anakin goes in the line and says he's trying to make a trade. It was all a set up as Cal explained.
The remaining seven minutes turned into a disaster, when a loud blast echoed through one of the hallways outside the room. Then an alarm went off and the lights switched to a dim green light. I just wish they won't turn off any other system before I can transfer everything, otherwise this would be just a waste of time and job. We looked at each other, he was gripping his lightsaber tightly waiting for something to happen, while I held the blaster just for the sake of it. There was another loud burst from a distance, the red head sprinted closer to me.
"Is everyone good?" He asked through the comlink, no one answered. "Damn it" He muttered.
"We need to get out of here before it gets worse!" I try to step in and figure out a way for us to get out. He didn't seem to listen. "Cal!".
"We're closing in on the ship. We noticed a few explosions around" Poe finally chimes in, but not with good news.
Why is it never good?
And then Skywalker called out again, this time shouting words I couldn't understand. I twist my head to the side and look at Cal with desperation.
"It's a code, they're attacking us" He immediately watched as I stood up from the chair. "Hey, look at me! I'm here, you're fine okay?".
Definitely far from being fine. He then proceeded to talk but I'm too busy being stunned to care about it. His voice started to get muffled and I felt like my vision was getting blurry. Is this even the right time to faint or have a panic attack? He shakes both of my arms calling out my name, and I slowly blink a few times before staring back at him.
"For fuck's sake, (Y/N/N). Listen to me" He then places his hands over my face, forcing me to look him in the eyes. "Please, listen. I need to go back there and help them. There's a digital lock on the door, they can't get through if you block it. They'll need to blow it up to get to you".
And you think it's hard for them to do it? That won't be enough.
Again, he furrows his brows and keeps holding my face. "Stop with the overthinking, I can hear it louder. Look, I'll manage it. I'll be back in no time, just wait for the files to finish and you wipe out the rest, fuck it. We don't care!"
I try to agree with the plan, but it was just too hard to keep up with everything. Before he turns on his back to leave the room, Poe speaks up again.
"There's a General lying on the floor, he seems to be injured. It's on Block D" He states before going off again.
This time, me and Cal share the same look. Now he seems more concerned than I do. I follow his gaze up the vent we came from, nudging himself up as he grips the edge literally vanishing. I call out to him, but he doesn't answer.
"Shit!" My hands are shaking so bad, I can't even type without missing the keys. "Shit, shit, shit".
Two minutes. Just give us two minutes and we're out. I hear a lot of grunting up on the room, the floor above me filled with noises and shuffling. The locked door starts pounding and I look straight ahead, fright starting to wash over my body.
"Poe" I have no fucking idea what I'm doing. "Are you there?".
"Definitely here, Miss. How are you holding up?" He asks.
"Do you see any of them? There's someone trying to break in and I don't know what I'm gonna do!" My heart is racing and it feels like I'm going to have a stroke in the middle of the room.
"Just talk to me, alright? How long until it's done?" His voice sounds comforting from the other side until he shouts. "R2! Not that guy, he's friendly!".
I have no idea what's going on outside but I try to shrug it off. "Two minutes! My hands are shaking so bad that I'm not sure I can shoot whoever comes in".
"Okay, not so bad" It takes him another second to keep talking. "I remember I learned a breathing technique, we're doing it together alright?".
I forget he's not next to me and I nod, but I feel like he got that anyway because he started counting and walking me through it. Breathe in and count to 4. Then count to 4 breathing out. Repeat.
"Now, hold your blaster up. Focus on anything as a target and breathe. When you inhale, you count one second and shoot. Don't wait, just shoot. If you miss it, just keep shooting" He explains, wasting his time giving me attention instead.
It makes me feel bad that someone has to do it when he could've been minding his own task. But I'm really appreciative either way. I don't know where the fuck Cal is.
"Don't forget to use anything for hiding and leverage. And please, don't forget to bring back the device" Nice one, Poe. Imagine being in danger like this and not even being able to remember one simple thing.
"Okay, thank you, commander" I breathe through my mouth and grasp the blaster.
Looking over the computer screen, I see that there's only forty seconds left and the door is about to burst open. At the same time, I hear Poe for the last time.
"We're sharing a beer when we land in Coruscant. I wanna learn some technology tricks" I barely have time to laugh as I watch the door sling open.
Okay, breathe. One. Shoot.
Shit.
I miss it by inches. From across the room, I look at Anakin giving me a snide stare as the blast just crossed past his shoulder. I gasp from the outcome and the sudden surprise, but he doesn't give me time to process everything as he shouts at me. His eyes are pure angriness and his shoulders are stiffened.
"Come on, I don't have all the time in the world!" Anakin waits by the door as I quickly set the system to wipe everything out and grab the device before we sprinted out of there.
We rushed with him behind me, there was a mess all over the place and the blaring alarm was deafening. I couldn't even aim while running, my hands were sweating and I was afraid of tripping on my foot. He kept dodging the attacks as well as blocking them from coming at me. This is the most attention I'm going to get from him and it's kinda funny given he hates me.
Anakin pulled a hand over my shoulder to guide me towards the hangar, my eyes shifting to take notice of what was incoming. I tried to at least shoot some of the droids but I was terrible at it.
"Grievous just left the hangar with an escape pod" Cal spoke up after a while and I let out a heavy and long exhale. "Knock down these fucking droids and hurry up!"
I didn't understand the seriousness in his voice, the Jedi Knight behind me still hasn't said a word yet and I have no idea what I'm actually doing at this point. Shooting at them and missing doesn't quite help knocking them down faster and I swear I can hear Anakin just groaning in frustration.
Out of nowhere my arm gets yanked back by a guard droid, pulling me over a room and wrapping its robotic arm around my neck. As if I was panicking already, this time I was pretty sure I was going to collapse. I tried to shove myself off from the tight grip, but it only made me flinch more.
"Drop your weapons, Master Skywalker" It said with their gun stuck to my temple.
I looked at him with such fright, my eyes were desperately crying for help. Anakin frowned, using his flesh hand to hold the lightsaber while the other one he used to pull back using his force.
"Let her go!" He screamed, bloodshot eyes and blue irises staring at the droid holding me. "I said let her fucking go!".
"I'm sorry, Master. We have a mission of our own to do" The droid said before managing to leave me unconscious on the floor.
Anakin:
Fuck. Shit. Motherfucker. Fucking cunt.
I kneel in front of her as she lies unconscious on the floor. She seems to be breathing, but I have no idea what this cocksucker did to her. I didn't expect my mission to be such a disastrous piece of shit. As she's still out, I look back at the droid that's staring at me with a puzzling look on its face.
I know how to read droids' faces and it's a gift from heaven. It's easy to trick them when I want.
"What did you do?" I shout and use my hands to shove it back with the force. I tap her face a few times, she doesn't even flinch. My voice barely comes out as a whisper to avoid the other droids to find me.
How much worse can it get?
I grab her, sliding my arms under her torso and lifting her up in a quick motion. At least she's easy to carry. Through my comlink, Cal starts getting riled up and spitting words like he was worried about something. And then I remember about their friendship.
Fuck me.
I try to ignore all the cursing through my ear, at the same time as I pull (Y/N) up on my shoulder, her body swinging as I run faster. I can't dodge all the attacks at once, but I maneuver myself avoiding getting us both killed. My lightsaber slashes them, knocking them down making it easier to get to the hangar.
"I have her, Kestis! Will you shut the fuck up now?" My voice screeches when I yell at him and my throat hurts.
"Why doesn't she answer her fucking comlink, then? Did you kill her, Skywalker?" His voice started to annoy me, my head was hurting from all the situation. I groan loud enough for him to listen.
"Yeah sure, I killed her and now I'm bringing her body myself because I'm just that smart. She's fucking unconscious, relax!"
And now he's just being even louder and insufferable.
Poe spoke up, his voice emerging like an angel sent from God. "Alright, guys. Let's just settle down, we're not at kindergarten".
I roll my eyes at his statement, rushing towards the hangar. The only ship in good shape was one of theirs, and Cal was standing in front of it. He was pacing around, hands on his hips, his forehead was creased and when he saw us he bolted forward.
"What the fuck happened?" The redhead asked in dread, throwing his arms up.
"We don't have time for bickering right now, Cal. Just help me get her up inside!" I swear my head was going to explode anytime soon. "A droid pulled up some shit on her and she just blacked out".
Could've said it sooner, he would probably understand. He looks at me like he knows something, but I don't bother asking.
"It was probably a spell or something. We need to lay her down" He says sternly as we approach the back of the vehicle and drop her on a cushioned bench.
"This is not what I planned for this goddamn assignment!" I mumble before turning on my back to both of them, heading to the cockpit.
"Well she got the fucking device, you should be glad she could do it and not die either!" He spat back, his hands holding her feet as he props her on the bench.
I just turn away from him making my way to my seat, turning on the gears. Hopefully we'll be back sooner than I expect, I just want to take a long shower and be with Luke for a while.
"We're good to go?" Dameron asks, his voice in a relieved tone as he watches us leave the hangar.
"Yes, commander" I mirror his tone and fly off the starship.
My mind eases as we leave it behind, I feel my hands grip the yoke from the ship tight. We didn't get to do the trade, Grievous noticed our plan way before we could get ahead of them. They attacked us in a matter of seconds, bolting at us with no time to figure out an escaping route.
This one mission is hours away from Coruscant, so it was going to be a pain in the ass to sit this close to Kestis. The moment I realized I had to be next to him it just made me pissed. I don't care about (Y/N) on the back, she tried to help and she barely knows how to blast a gun.
I won't complain about how Cal helped the team out there, as a matter of fact. But I still can't stand seeing his face, considering we just confronted each other the other day. The guy always means good to people, but it doesn't stop me from hating his guts after what he pulled on me during our meetings.
Almost two hours after we left Grievous' ship, we were almost entering the Coruscant atmosphere. That was when she finally woke, a grunt escaping from her lips as she finally took in where she was. Cal helps her lean against the wall, while she places a hand over her head.
"Holy shit" That's her first words after waking up. She can't help but smile at the achievement she made.
I watch as she still keeps the smile on her face, pulling the device between her fingers and raising the object in front of her eyes. It took me seconds to notice I myself had a side smile against my will. The red head leans for a hug, both of them laughing.
I can't help but clear my throat before I regret doing this. "Uh- Good job out there, geek. The team is proud of you" I barely speak and the guy seems to remark that.
"What did you say? We can't hear it!" He says it out loud on purpose, and I feel my hands balling into fists. "Did you just compliment (Y/N/N)?"
"Don't push it, Kestis" My eyes roll to the back of my head, I push myself off the wall. "Good to see you're up".
They stare at my figure quite shocked, their faces almost the same as their mouths hanging open in such a surprise. I'm very aware that's the kind of effect I cause on people when I'm being nice, and I know I'm not really the golden boy of the year either.
But I can't just avoid the fact that, without her, we wouldn't have information about General Grievous and his army. Even though it didn't end how we expected it, that's a win after all.
Before I walk back to the cockpit, I hear her cracked voice speak up. Like she was embarrassed of talking to me. "Thank you for saving me out there".
My head nods before I turn on my heels, it almost feels like I've switched back to the young Anakin. Real smooth, Skywalker.
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