#this is turning into a vent post 🤨

[misty-moth]

The part of me that craves chaos wants Cybird to announce the new release date for ikevil as Monday.

And then just. Not release it.

[shirogane-oushirou]

i've rewritten this twice and it's still a ramble so. lol. it is what it is.

[ cw burnout, mental health ]

i need to change SOMETHING about how i do things on here. irl shit is making my mental health go places it hasn't in years, and i feel like i need a more low-pressure way to do things here, but i also don't want to lose friends or stop talking with people. i CAN NOT go back to how i was before entering the community... but like. i barely have the ability to daydream about ren right now because the only thing buzzing around in my head is stress and panic. if on the "imagine an apple" test i'm normally at a 5 with ren, right now he's like a 2. there but like... foggy. not really doing anything. i hate it.

idk how this is gonna pan out in the long run. i might do rbs here and then more personal selfship stuff on c.ohost or something, to get away from the energy and speed of the dash on here (i haven't actually checked out the comm over there yet so idk how good of a solution this is). i've debated remaking to reduce my followers, but it'd be inconvenient to have multiple separate archives. i might have to go back to very short tags when rb-ing art.

and i DEEEFINITELY need to figure out how to get out of a perfectionist mindset for stupid things like. playlists??? playlists are supposed to be fun, but when the oushiversary and renniversary came up, the playlists weren't Perfect so they weren't Worth Posting... when one of my fav things is people who post multiple playlists for the same character bc they just keep coming up with more perfect songs. idk, i'm holding myself to some ridiculous standard. maybe posting those playlists and posting less polished art could help.

sorry, at this point i'm basically just talking myself through this lmao. but. i'm Not Doing Well Babeyyyyy, and if i keep doing what i'm doing, i'm going to stop posting altogether from burnout.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for saying I was uncomfortable with a 21 year old flirting with me?

I [18FTM] have been perusing the dating & sex scene since I just turned 18. I met this guy on Lex (it’s basically a dating app/social media for queer people, where everybody’s age is public), I’ll call him Tony [21FTM]. We started talking for a while, just platonically, until I made a post asking about hookups in the area. Tony messaged me asking if I’d hook up with him, and I told him no, thanks without explanation. He accepted that pretty easily.

That day, I went to my friends [All 19-22] to tell them about the experience. I was being a little dramatic/ over exaggerating my discomfort (like “Why does he want to sleep with a TEENAGER 🤨”) but just because that’s the humor my friends and I have (since I’m the youngest, they always jokingly call me a minor even though I’m well over 18 by now). But after the sillies I just straight up told them I felt weird about a 21 year old wanting to have sex with me.

(Obviously, I know I’m an adult and I know there’s not really anything inherently wrong with an 18+21 year old hooking up or even dating in most circumstances. I don’t think Tony is a creep and I don’t really judge him for trying to sleep with me, I just felt creeped out by it since I still felt/feel very young (this was just a month or two after I turned 18) and I had only ever slept with or dated people within a year and a half age gap. I am also aware I probably should’ve said in the post that I was only interested in 18-or-19 year olds, so that is My Bad — again, I am not judging him, just making my personal feelings clear).

Anyway, I thought venting a little to my friends was mostly harmless. Except it turns out Tony was one of my friend’s COUSIN. And now Tony was upset with me because he thought that I thought he was a creep, and my friend was upset with me because she thought that I thought her cousin was a creep. Y’know.

My friend (who is 20 and originally agreed with me, saying something like “Yeah, I’m 20 and I can’t even look at an 18 year old that way, that’s weird”) suddenly felt like I was being mean and judgmental and a “puritan”, and Tony was all but crying in my DMs, apologizing profusely, which made me feel terrible. I tried to explain myself to both of them but now Tony and my friend wouldn’t talk to me.

Idk, AITA?

[s3thwrit3sstuff]

I swear to god every time I come on here to post my silly gay stuff there’s always someone (ALWAYS ANONYMOUSLY TOO) talking shit about one thing or another.

I know I should not pay them any mind but I just need to vent —

I take a long time to write because inspiration is a bitch and, ONCE AGAIN, I am doing this for FREE. You bitchless losers want to read about someone turning you into a pretzel so badly, which is something I can respect, but when you’re bitching about it in my inbox I have to laugh. 💀

You want me so bad, huh? Want me to write about you getting fucked by a fictional man in graphic detail because you’re a talentless fuck who can’t write and use Character Ai to forget the fact that you’re an impatient, lonely, loser.

Who the FUCK do you think you are to come into MY inbox to whine and whine and whine about me taking forever to write?

Then some bitches are nagging in my ear about me fetishing transmasc — motherfucker I’M a transman 💀

I haven’t had bottom surgery, never plan on it either, and I love my boypussy so I’m sorry YOU hate people being happy but that’s on YOU.

I will continue to write ftm!reader getting his bussy wrecked.

“Oh, but you only write ftm!reader being submissive to cismen!”

WHO SAYS THEY’RE CIS? 🤨 This is fanfiction, for all we know, Gojō Satoru is a transman with bottom surgery. Did you think of that, huh? You bitches try so hard to label me as a fetishizer while your ass is on TUMBLR 💀

And if you don’t want to read bottom!reader then fucking scroll past??? I am not responsible for what Tumblr shows on your feed, you curate that yourself, dumbshit.

Just let me breathe, dawg 😭

[scarefox]

gossip vent post

Reading all the takes under a video of guys first step into BL dramas with watching KinnPorsche (some haters in the comments for sure who are salty about that choice. The more amusing it is that the guys treat KP like a gay James Bond movie). People still say there are no women in BL other than nameless extras... or that everyone is gay except the parents... I can name at least 3 more recent dramas with queer parents / parental figures and female characters in side couples 🤨 also not every BL guy is gay, some are bi or pan.

I srsly don't get how so many people are active BL watchers and then still have those takes from decades ago. What are they all watching to not catch a nice woman or queer parent nowadays in a BL???? or is it that they ignore or even skip them when they are present because they only care about hot guys kissing

Some even admitting they only watch KP for the smut and skip the plot because the plot is bad and not present anyways. Peoples relationship towards sex scenes in asian dramas that turns off their brains is so wild to me... how are yall living like this? Following a story while there are sex scenes is srsly not that hard and I do like sex scenes too but still notice the plot happening. The way yall downgrade a drama just because of sex scenes is problematic but hey...

Also the ones who recommend ancient boring and tame af BLs or TharnType as the first step into the genre. You do not have to sift though the primordial soup of engineering student dramas to get into this genre when we have so many neat diverse options nowadays too. Not saying that older dramas aren't worth watching but it's not mandatory for historical significance to enjoy BL? There are dramas we only watched because it was our first and we didn't had anything better back then and then there are older dramas that are actually good and worth a watch. There is a difference.

And that's my sunday tea for now.

[nanamikentorp]

Kento, my love, how are you doing? You bettet be taking care of yourself (and adminie you too!) 🤨

Anywhoo to answer your prev question, I'm pursuing masters in audiology, and thankfully i love the branch, only downside is a big chunk of it is sales (Hearing aids) which I'm absolutely horrible at with a huge lack in confidence as well. So now I'm hoping wherever i get recruitment they don't have pressure for sales (😭 i really can't do it, I'm genuinely scared of it) also cuz I'm shit at talking

Wow, that turned into a rant/vent., anywayy i missed you loads and loads but i saw this post👇🏻 and i just had to msg you

https://www.tumblr.com/frenchcoucou/761551186028625920?source=share

- 💖 (love you adminie 💕)

Hello love.

I'm well. (Admin too!) I sincerely hope you are taking care of yourself as well. I would hate for any of you to be falling sick or something.

I understand not being excited about sales. Truth be told, it's a soul sucking job with not much respect for its workers. But, if you can get a position that is slightly higher, it's not so bad...

Fingers crossed and I wish you the best of luck in your work, my dear.

Oh and perhaps this is what I should be for Halloween? A cowboy? The clothing seems simple enough, just need to get myself a hat.

(love you 💖 anon!!! Muah!)

[beastwars-transformers]

Stolen prompt: shuffle your likes or your favorite playlist and post the first ten tracks

I’m doing my on repeat playlist since I don’t trust my actual everything playlist…plus you gotta talk about the song and I can’t do that with the hundreds of random music I saved because I sort of liked it…

The Rain - Smash Into Pieces. One of the few vent songs I play when mommy issues flare up lol…also I always love songs that use the sun as a goal, to finally feel it after years of darkness and cold. It goes hard.

Dreams Without a Future - Sabled Sun. Beautiful piano but it’s the title that really punches me. I can’t articulate it. Just let it sink in. Dreams without a future, hopes with no hope, yearning for what is forever out of reach. Consider that the song is part of a project about a dying, overindustrilaized earth and…

The Blood is Art - Pastelle. This is one of my main ship songs uhhhh so to spare everyone…I really enjoy the singer’s voice, she nails the ethereal and angelic, and hearing it with such angry lyrics and sharp turns in notes is really interesting. And I adore the ending, just haunting vocalizations that are seeped in regret and sorrow…

Pottle - Bengalfuel. For once I cannot wax poetic about an ambient song. It’s just really calming and relaxing, 10/10 noises.

Love You (When You’re a Mess) - Jadudah. found this song during a really lull era where I wasn’t finding any new good music so I became so obsessed. The guitar riffs go crazy. Also I found this song when I was first getting into my stupid ship so 😅

Island - Bengalfuel. This is from the same album as 4 so…still applies. Nice noises, I like it a lot more for having reverb and longer notes.

Wicked Game - Chris Isaak. Quintessential post-hang out song. I use it mainly to relax but still want something more song-like than ambient. Again, I love guitar, and the strumming in this is really something.

Your Eyes Open - Keane. Another thing I really love is unconventional instruments together. So I really enjoy how the piano is used alongside drums and vocals. And again, I really enjoy long notes which the vocals easily supply.

(I skipped a song because it was another BENGALFUEL ALBUM ONE) Into The Unknown - Starset. I actually used to hate this song haha. But then it grew on me. Did you know there’s piano in this too? You can only hear it with good headphones, buried in the chorus. But, starset has my favorite hard rock/metal guitar riffs, hence why they’re like…my #1 band. I paid $140 to get my albums signed 🤨

Secret of Life - Lord Huron. The chorus would help me reach like 20mph on my bike it went so hard. Also reminds me of one of my favorite OCs…I should really go back to writing…oh well.

Tagging…..!!!!!! @umbralundertaker @nightfuryqueen @nightfuryqueen @prussianmemes @prophet60091 @stoplookingformee @imgoingtoputscorpionsinyourmouth and do it if you want even if you’re not tagged Teehee

[plinkcat-gif]

drafting a post and it starts turning into a vent 🤨🤨