#this layout is egregious

[yeyinde]

I sometimes wonder if one of the questions tumblr asks when hiring staff is "on a scale of one to ten, how badly do you hate tumblr and it's userbase?" and only answers that score 8 or higher are considered for the position.

[dappermouth]

I'm not sure if it's intentional, are you aware images posted on your blog are full screen width? it takes a while to scroll them and you have to click on them in order to be able to see the full artwork (I have a really big monitor). Not that I don't like seeing your art up close though!

oh yeahhh tumblr made some changes a while ago which totally broke my desktop blog theme in several ways. It's not on purpose! I need to find a new one but I love this ancient theme sooo much. If anyone out there knows a lookalike/similar theme or knows how I might fix it I would love you for all time

[fingertipsmp3]

Like ultimately staff can do what they want with this website. That’s their business. I just wish they’d stop pretending to care about their userbase while rolling out features basically nobody wants lmao

[threewaysdivided]

New Desktop Dash, No Bueno

Okay so, new dash layout on desktop.

As seems to be a common reaction: not a fan.

Let's talk about some of the issues:

1. Really visually cluttered

The new sidebar crowds out the dashboard content and the bright blue popup notifications (now at the side AND top) and create-post bar pull your eyes in different directions. There is no space for the eye to rest on anymore - it's all noise. The end result is that everything flattens - there's no focal point anymore.

It's also pretty overwhelming - even for someone like me - so I can't imagine it would be very user-friendly to someone who was photosensitive or struggled with visual overload (especially when paired with the high-contrast 'true blue' default site palette and animated icons for the changes-on-tumblr/staff-picks/trending buttons).

2. The activity pop-up now covers dashboard content

This is really bad from a usability standpoint. In the old layout the activity pop-up used to drop down over the recommended blogs sidebar. Now it actively gets in the way of looking at core content. The dash is why we are here, burying it like this is baffling.

The search bar now drops down over the recommended blogs banner instead, but where the old design had non-critical space on each side of the dashboard to visually allow both features to pop in, this new layout is way worse for efficiency. And for what? Having a rarely-used former drop-down menu now permanently active? The old banner with quick-links for the key use-features (notes, messages, askbox) made much more design sense.

It also means that the activity pop-up gets now completely covered by the blog pop-up that opens when you click the notification, so double demerit there. 0/10.

3. It's harder to navigate to the activity page, and the new page-stretch means you can't see new notes without scrolling down

That first bit is kind of a nitpick but cramming the 'See everything' link down at the bottom of a browser window isn't a great navigation choice. (Again, the visual signifiers and eye-direction in this new design are incredibly poor.)

That the main activity page now requires you to scroll to even see the top note due to the new display ratio is really egregious. It makes another key site feature just slightly less convenient and accessible in a very irritating way. Bad choice.

4. The new ratio pushes the Radar and Main Sponsored slot completely off-screen

This one is directed the tumblr staff: that's also a bad choice, guys. That's your main ad-slot for people loading into Tumblr so hiding it is going to hurt both your ad-impressions and your ability to promote the ad-free option. The new layout ratio also means that the in-dash ads are going to be a lot more invasively screen-filling - and let's be real most users will either add-block or leave before purchasing ad-free. I have no idea what the new layout is trying to achieve but if ad optimisation is the goal then this ain't it, chief.

To be honest I cannot comprehend the rationale for this change. I guess it's visually a bit more like Twitter... but that site is currently being demolished from the inside by poor management decisions so maybe it's not the best aesthetic to be aping.

Well then, what do?

Okay so, new dash bad. And so, in true Tumblr spirit: we complain. However, to get results we must deploy the art of kvetching productively.

If you want the old dash back (or at least, a better new-dash design that corrects some of these big weaknesses) what you should do is head over to https://www.tumblr.com/support and lodge a feedback ticket pointing out the problems. The more users who do that, the more likely you are to see an effective response.

Remember, tagging @staff and @support in posts won't fix this. There's no guarantee they'll see it among the notes barrage.

Also: please don't be rude or abusive when you lodge tickets. Whoever is manning those blogs and inboxes probably isn't the person who forced through this change. Save an intern, be polite.

Go forth in disgruntlement to keep this hellhole a hellhome.

[highvern]

Does Your Mother Know?

Pairing: Jung Wooyoung x fem!reader

Genre: smut, porn without plot

Warnings: Age gap (reader is like 35ish and Wooyoung is 24), divorced!reader, cabana boy!Wooyoung, an insane amount of sexual tension, egregious use of the word “ma’am”. breast play, exhibitionism, teasing, hand job, dry humping, oral (f receiving), panties used in unintended ways, cum eating, praise and degradation (m and f receiving), unprotected sex, unspoken cougar kink from Wooyoung, multiple orgasms, sub/brat Wooyoung, dom reader

Length: ~6k

Note: NOT PROOF READ!!! literally based on "Does Your Mother Know" by ABBA (the Mamma Mia version SPECIFICALLY.). @mingyuonthemoon please tell me you understand the vision lololol

This blog is intended for 18+ only! MDNI or you'll be blocked!

read more here

“Ahhhhh! Look at you!”

“Look at you!” You respond, pulling Mina in for a tight hug.

It’d been years since you’d had the pleasure of her company. Finally free from the grump who was your ex-husband, you’re ready to spend a summer tanning on the beach and drinking away the nights. No one but you and your best friend.

Mina interlockes her arm with yours, tugging you along for an impromptu tour. Immediately a short man with shaggy hair steps in your path, positively beaming with a shit eating grin.

“Y/N, this is Wooyoung. He’s in charge of taking care of you. Your personal attendant for the summer.”

Oh.

“Nice to meet you, ma’am.” Wooyoung smiles, hand reaching out for a gentle shake. “If you need anything, I’m your man.”

Something in his tone heats your belly. A tease in his words, the dangerous glint in his eye as he stares you down. He’s gone as soon as Mina dismisses him with orders to handle your suitcase, flashing a brazen smirk and wink that could only mean one thing.

“You’re drooling.”

Batting at your cheek, you glare at her when she laughs.

“Listen, I get it!” She defends, continuing to tug you towards the center of the plaza. “He’s a cutie and he knows it. But Wooyoung is the best here and I thought you deserved something nice to look at while relaxing.”

“I’ll be sure to send you a thank you card.”

“Ahh, but this is my thank you for getting the old grump to invest before getting divorced.”

“At least he’s useful to one of us.”

“Speaking of usefulness. How long has it been since you’ve had something other than the gross four minute hump and dump from Seungcheol?”

“None of your business!” You roll your eyes. “Just show me all the things you bought with his money.”

Mina continues to gush about the recent improvements. A sparkling fountain serving as a centerpiece of the hotel layout, beautiful in the afternoon glow. A second block of rooms to meet the extensive waitlist to stay at Baia delle Perle. And the pristine cabana’s lining the pool and beach below, white sheets providing privacy to the inhabitants. 

—

True to her word, Wooyoung is the best attendant you could ask for. Half of it is the fact that this is his job and he’s getting paid extra to follow you around like a puppy rather than do his usual chores across the villas. The other half is an intense infatuation with you.

Despite popular belief, he doesn’t sleep with the clientele. Maybe some indulgent flirting here and there with disillusioned housewives or a cheeky wink at a woman old enough to be his grandmother but Wooyoung isn’t desperate enough to pimp himself out for a tip. He makes enough money operating on a strict look but no touch policy. With you it’s different. 

The need to prove himself heats his blood. Every approving smile, every thank you when he surprises you with exactly what you didn’t know you needed. And when he overhears you showering him with praise about how good he was at his job to Mina, Wooyoung sprinted to his room and rubbed one out to the fantasy of you telling him how good he was in a much more indecent setting.

He’d like to think the thoughts swirling in his head are also making an appearance in your own. Tugging on the thin strings of your barely there bikini till they let him see the scant inches of skin they manage to cover. Giving you exactly what you ask for on one of the cushioned pool chairs. Take the time to ensure you get everything you need in the privacy of your suite.

But you meet each tongue in cheek comment with a sharp look, letting Wooyoung know you're more than aware of the feelings driving him wild. And you brush him away anytime he tries to press forward. 

Good thing Wooyoung loves the chase.

“One mojito for the special guest.”

You smile politely at him while taking the cold glass. “Thank you, Wooyoung. Oh shoot.” 

A tiny pool of liquid splashes between your breasts, a freezing stream slipping down your sunheated skin. Wooyoung desperately wants to clean it up with his tongue. But you haven’t given him the greenlight yet so he simply pulls out the towel he keeps tucked in his back pocket for occasions such as these.

“Sorry about that. Didn’t mean to get you messy/”

“Not your fault! I’m just a bit clumsy.”

“I’ll help!” Wooyoung chirps, set on patting you dry as he raises the cloth to your chest.

“I can handle it.” You object.

But Wooyoung doesn’t listen and you don’t try to stop him as he wipes down your front. The rough cotton scratches against the sensitive skin of your sternum, goosebumps surging to the surface with each pass. You can feel the weight of his hands on the other side of the towel, the curl of his fingers holding the fabric. 

He’s unnecessarily thorough. Swiping at your stomach with the excuse of a few rogue drops before working back up to your breast. The little shit even has the nerve to smile at you when he announces “all done!” brightly. Like he hadn’t just felt you up.

But before he can move away, you snatch his wrist and tug him back down to eye level. Wooyoung looks like a starved wolf eying a steak, hopeful this is when you’ll finally give him a taste. But if he wants you then he’ll have to work for it. And you're aching to see just how far you can push him before he breaks.

“Did you need something else, ma’am?”

“Little boys who play with fire get their fingers burned, Wooyoung.” You warn, smiley venomously as his stomach clenches under the drag of your finger against the waistband of his shorts.

And then as if it was all a dream, you let him go and grab your book. You ignore Wooyoung’s look of pure disbelief as you find your place; resolved to ignore him and the entire interaction just to see him squirm. So dedicated to the charade you almost miss Wooyoung’s whispered response as he turns to leave.

“Looking forward to it.”

—

Round two of your game with Wooyoung happens later that week. Both of you pretended the incident by the pool never happened. If you can count the way Wooyoung devours you with his eyes when no else is around, or how you’ve fished out the tiniest bathing suits from your luggage. One big game of chicken with no clear victor yet as you push each other fold. Today you want to change that.

“Wooyoung?” You call from your chair.

“Yes ma’am?”

“Can you help me?”

His footsteps echo against the wooden floor as he approaches, “Sure! What’s up?”

“I can’t reach my back.” You say innocently, handing him a bottle of sunscreen.

It’s not subtle but just plausible enough to deny ulterior motives. Eyebrows kissing his hairline, Wooyoung clearly sees through your facade.

“Of course,” he coughs.

You hear the click of the cap just before you feel the cool cream against your skin. Jumping at the contact, Wooyoung chuckles behind you at your reaction. His palms warm it up quickly as they massage across your back. A knot along your spine becomes Wooyoung’s new focus as the lotion settles in, allowing his thumbs to work it apart.

A sigh is out of your mouth and in the air at the delectable pressure.

“Someone’s tense.”

“Maybe I should book a massage at the spa.”

“Or I can help you out.”

You moan as the tips of his fingers stretch around your sides to skim the border of your triangle bikini top, nails scratching along the hills of your breast. Wooyoung returns his hands to your shoulders, thumbs unknotting all the muscles he’s unknowingly responsible for tightening. Melting in his hands, you close your eyes and enjoy.

Eventually, your back is taken care of but you’re still desperate for more. Chancing a look over your shoulder, you find dilated pupils and low lids mirroring your own.

 “Can you get my front too?”

Gently, Wooyoung assists in flipping you over. He takes his time pouring more sunblock into his hand, palms rubbing together before stretching across your stomach to start mapping your skin. The curve of your hip fits perfectly in his grip. All you can think about is how helpful that’d be if you were sitting on his cock. Head lulling back, you let Wooyoung do what you’ve learned he does best: take care of you.

“More?” He rasps.

“More.” You sigh.

You're still in public. Hidden in the gossamer curtains of your private cabana, faraway from everyone else but public no less. Anyone could walk up at any time and push the curtains aside to find Wooyoung slipping his hand under your bikini to massage your rounded breasts.

Biting back a gasp, you swallow as the slick of greasy lotion allows Wooyoung to glide his thumbs over your taunt nipples. The twinge of pain forces your back into a harsh arch and your eyes shut. You want to moan his name but the thrill of getting caught becomes much less sexy and incredibly terrifying at the idea.

You’ve never been so turned on in your life. You’d never felt like this even in the most lovely fleeting moments of your marriage. Seungcheol never made you want him so much you were willing to beg, so wet he could slip right in to split you and half. 

Wooyoung fingers continue their laborious pace, still holding on to the gause of helping you apply sunscreen as he squeezes a cool line across your legs; resembling something far lewder that makes your brain spin.

“Here too?”

“Mhm!”

The insides of your thighs melt under the new attention. He starts at your knees, bending each leg individually to torture you. You thrash at the gentle caress of the breeze against the damp crotch of your bikini. But Wooyoung won’t be interrupted as he focuses on the task at hand, kneading the tight muscles harder while you quiver in under him.

He hasn’t even kissed you when one finger strokes your covered core before he dips away.

“All done!” 

You want to slap the shit eating grin right off his face. Of course the tease would work you up just to leave you wet and wanting for the rest of the day; more ambiguous promises of what could be happening but you won’t fold first. Wooyoung wants to play this mind melting game and you’ll show him you’re the master.

—

The next time you're alone with Wooyoung, you already have a plan in motion to get him on his knees.

Two days after the incident by the pool, you’re cocooned under the blankets until the last possible moment. He hadn’t come to your room to check on you yet and you used the uninterrupted time to soak in the biting streams of the shower. Mina mentioned something about getting lunch in a text but provided no solid details. She’d been too busy running the resort to spend much time catching up. But a meeting with investors was canceled and freed the rest of the usually busy day for her. No doubt Wooyoung would show up to escort you wherever you were supposed to meet Mina for a meal.

Primping in the mirror you take in the glow of your cheeks and glimmer in your eyes. It’d been a long time since you looked so… alive. A miserable marriage drained the life out of you like a parasite. But sunshine and sand had been a perfect cure.

A knock at the door breaks your trance, no doubt Wooyoung from the unique rhythm he always announced himself with. The sound of the door shutting lets you know he’s invited himself into the empty bedroom.

“Wooyoung! Can you come in here please?” You called.

The shuffling of his footsteps reach your ears before you see him but when you do you smother a laugh. Wooyoung chokes on air when he spots you. Hands holding your top to chest, the back open and slack to reveal nothing but uninterrupted skin that disappears under your skirt. How easy it’d be to drop the entire thing and let him see exactly what he’d been playing with those days ago.

“I can't reach the zipper. Would you mind helping me?”

Wooyoung’s head nods so hard it must hurt his neck as he stumbles up behind you. For someone who talks a big game, getting a reaction from him is surprisingly easy. Watching him in the mirror, you see his adams apple bob with a harsh swallow before shaking fingers clench the fabric to hook the zipper. To make things harder for him, you lean forward to put your weight into your hands on the counter. Wooyoung falters at the arch in your spine and how it curves your ass towards him.

Dipping your head to hide the smirk cutting across your cheeks, you coo at him. “You’re always so helpful, Youngie.”

His hands falter under the mocking praise, successfully jamming the zipper. Cursing under his breath, he crouches to get a closer look and the caress of his breath on your spine threatens your control.

“Sorry,” he apologies, voice thick.

“Don’t worry about it! This top just so tight and it makes it so hard to get it on. Just go nice and slow, yeah?”

The sharp intake of breath behind you sends a wave of satisfaction through your core. Fixing the zipper takes much longer than needed, Wooyoung crumbling under your watchful eye in the mirror. Finding a new opportunity to torture him, you bat away his hands before wriggling the top until the zipper sitting between your breasts. Working the sides apart, you spin to hand the piece of fabric back to Wooyoung, naked from the waist up. 

“Try again.” 

Wooyoung doesn’t seem to recognize anything beyond your tits until you press the top into his chest. Snapping out of his daze, you smile at him as you turn back around towards the mirror.

His arms reach around you to pull the shirt taunt across your front, his chest pressing against your naked spine, skin on skin thanks to his insistence on using only the bottom two buttons to keep it his own top closed. You can see the way his fingers twitch to feel you, to bend you over the sink and end the charade with a thrust of his cock; and your smirk tells him you know just how much he wants to.

By the grace of God, he manages to zip your top without another mishap. Turning this way and that in the mirror, Wooyoung simply watches with his hands on the sides of your hips atop the counter, pinning you between his body and the marble but not touching you. 

Turning to face him, you smile at the pinched expression clouding his features. “Thanks, Wooyoung. What would I do without you?”

Arousal rolls off him in thick waves, each shudder breath shaking his chest like he’s being held back by an invisible grip he desperately wants to break out of. 

“You’re so tense, Youngie.” You coo, tickling your nails across the side of his neck before letting them skate down his rippling stomach to skim the waistband of his shorts. “You need to relax.” 

The heat of his flushed cheeks burn against your palm as you cup his face. Wooyoung grinds his teeth as you taunt him with a soft squeeze around his half hard cock. “And you're burning up! Are you feeling okay?”

Beads of sweat bloom on his forehead when you dip into his underwear, met with the smooth velvet of his length across your knuckles. Eyes not leaving his, you feel his cock bob free when you force his shorts and boxers down clumsily. You dig your thumb into the weeping slit across the head to collect sticky pre-cum to ease the harsh friction. And positively beam at Wooyoung as his knees buckle with a strangled cry.

“What’s wrong, Woo?” You ask, leaning forward to nip at his earlobe. 

Each breath has his shirt brush against your chest, his exhales whoosh down the side of your neck. Tightening your pointer finger and thumb into a ‘O’, you fuck his cock through your hand until Wooyoung twitches frantically against you. And then you let go.

“Oh wow look at the time!” You gasp, checking the delicate silver watch circling your wrist. “I’ve got to meet Mina for lunch.”

Pinching his cheek between your fingers, you hold him in place to watch as you suck the evidence of his arousal off your thumb before twirling towards the door. “Bye, Wooyoung.”

Wooyoung simply stares as you leave, mouth gaping and utterly speechless with his cock still out. The latch of the bathroom door unlocks the snicker you’d been choking on. 

—

Beams of purple and blue light swirl across the dance floor, casting the crush of bodies in an underwater glow. Mina insisted you attend the staff party this evening, a combination of her birthday and celebrating the grand re-opening. No one batted an eye at your presence. All the staff eager to blow off some steam after a stressful week, letting loose on the bosses dime. 

You’d also found the indulgence of an open bar too tempting to pass up. A glass of red wine taking the edge of your incredibly tense shoulders.

“Is there a reason my best employee is watching you like a hawk?” Mina asks over the rim of her glass, smirking in your direction.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“Oh, really? So I should ask Wooyoung why he looks like a love sick puppy?”

Eyes wide, you tried to hide your embarrassment by flagging the bartender down for another drink. But Mina waves him off.

“So something is going on. Interesting.”

Glancing her way, you ask. “You’re not mad?”

“Why would I be mad? You’re both adults. Just don’t fuck him in public and make me call the cops. Now, go take care of lover boy before I throw up.”

With Mina’s permission, you itch to do just that. The last gulp of your drink goes down smoothly as you rise to leave. You’d pointedly ignored Wooyoung all night; one glance at the start of the party had been enough temptation for a lifetime. He looked like sex on legs; shirt unbuttoned to his stomach, hair tousled like someone ran their hands through it over and over. It wasn’t fair.

Squaring your shoulders, you find him leaning against a pillar right where you’re headed—watching you down the tip of his nose with his arms crossed. An arched eyebrow is all the invitation you provide as you saunter past him and into the cool night. 

Each step towards your suite echoes behind you, Wooyoung following closely. Goosebumps prickle across your shoulders, smothering your desperate attempts to breathe as he stalks you like a predator and you’re his prey.

How wrong he is.

You chance a peek behind you as you make it to the door of your villa. Wooyoung stands a few feet away, still watching you as you step inside.

“Are you planning to stand there all night or are you gonna come inside?”

He explodes with a swiftness you’d never witnessed before. The ungiving wall bites into your back as Wooyoung pins you, mouth on yours. 

All the waiting, all the teasing, had been more than worth it with how he takes your breath away with each pass of his lips. Mind dull from bliss, you don’t feel Wooyoung’s hands slipping down your sides to bunch your dress out of his way; a muscular thigh making its way between your spread legs, flexed for you to rock against. 

You don’t care that anyone can walk by the still open door and see the debauchery taking place. All you can think about is letting Wooyoung spinning you around, crowding you against the wall as he flips your skirt up, and fucking you until you can’t see straight. And if the hard lump pressing into your leg is any indication, Wooyoung is thinking the exact same thing.

But you promised Mina you wouldn’t.

“My room,” you groan into his mouth after another rough pass of his thigh.

Wooyoung either doesn’t hear you or doesn’t care, dropping to your neck to nip at your jugular. You try again but the words die on the tip of your tongue as his hands drop to harshly squeeze the supple flesh, pulling you against his thigh again.

Laughter chimes in the distance, loud enough to hear of the deafening rush of blood in your ears. Your room is in the last building, right on the edge to overlook the sprawling sea. No one has any reason to come out this far but the potential of being caught in such compromising positions makes you desperate for the safety of your room.

“Wooyoung.”

He grunts, this time rubbing his hard cock against you as his head drops into the curve of your shoulder. “Fuck, love it when you say my name.”

Winding a hand into the base of his hair, a sharp tug pulls him up to eye level. 

“My room, Wooyoung.” You say, eying the door again.

He blinks at your words until his brain finally catches up. Fingers tangled with yours, Wooyoung drags you down the hallway until the wooden door of your suite comes into view. He plucks the key out of your hand, unlocking the door and ushering you inside. The wood rattles on the hinges as he kicks it shut but you're both so lost in another heated makeout you don’t care.

You’re losing your nerve with each pass of his tongue, melting into his hold until the edge of the mattress presses into the back of your thighs. Wooyoung tries to push you down into the cushion and that’s the wake up call you need to remind you both who’s in charge.

“Wait.”

“What?” Wooyoung pants, staring at the finger you’ve dug into his chest.

“This is how it's going to go. “ You start, tracing it down the planes of bare skin as he shudders. “I’m gonna tell you what to do and you’re gonna listen. Okay?”

His eyes rise to meet your’s, a challenge burning behind them. “And if I don’t?”

“Then, I’m sure someone else will.”

You both know it’s an empty threat. An unsatisfactory ending to the cat and mouse game you’ve been playing for the past week. But if you’ve learned anything about the young man so eager to bed you he’ll agree to anything you say, it’s that just because Wooyoung is agreeing to your conditions doesn’t mean he isn’t going to have some of his own fun too. And that’s what you truly want to see.

“So if I say jump?” You smile.

“How high?”

Pinching his cheeks to pucker his lips, you reward him with a sarcastic praise. “Good boy. Now sit down.”

You take your time removing your shoes, enjoying how each minute makes Wooyoung more and more impertinent. He isn’t vocalizing his displeasure in having to wait, clearly afraid you’ll make good on your threat, but it bubbles under his skin. The inferno of his gaze blisters your skin as he watches your every move. Removing your jewelry piece by piece, going so far as you straighten everything out on the dresser just to hear the sharp breath Wooyoung releases. 

But he’s good the entire time and it both disappoints and pleases you.

Turning to face the bed, you stalk towards him. Wooyoung manages to keep himself in check until you’re standing between his spread legs, a manicured nail scratching across the jut of his collarbones revealed by the split front in his button up. Lungs expanding under your coy touches, you smirk right in his face and annoyance erupts on his face.

“Take this off.” You demand.

Popping open the last buttons at the bottom, Wooyoung all but rips it off in an effort to please. His eyes are wild as he anticipates what comes next. 

“Now take off mine.”

You bite back a laugh at Wooyoung dolling the same frantic swipes at your clothing. Ungraceful yet effective. The extensive collection of fancy lingerie you collected over the years sits in your closet at home but Wooyoung reacts to your simple black cotton bra and panties with the same enthusiasm as if you wore the nicest silk teddy.

“Do you wanna touch me?”

Eyes glued to your chest, he nods.

A finger under his chin forces Wooyoung to meet your stern expression. “Words.”

“Yes ma’am.” Wooyoung nods again.

“Yes, what?”

“I wanna touch you.”

“Then do it.”

The cool sheets feel delicious against the hot skin of your back as Wooyoung crowds over you. His mouth is yours, sucking the air from your lungs with a lick of his tongue across the curve of your lower lip; teeth razing across it gently. The hand not holding him upright grapples your leg, twisting it around his waist and allowing the weight of his cock to press against you. 

You’re content to let him take the lead for now and Wooyoung jumps at the chance to prove how good he can be without your directions. His hands stay firmly planted next to your head, caging you in as his tongue does absolute sinful things to your neck. Each gasping breath and stuttered mewl incited another rough cant of his hips into the sweet heat of your thighs. 

As anticipated, Wooyoung does nothing less than worship your body. His hands memorize every curve and dip, mouth etching down your chest before honing in on your breasts. Wooyoung has all the time in the world as he presses sweltering kisses across the swells of flesh— sucking a bruise across the side you’ll have to hide later.

“So good, Youngie.”

Pulling his hair with the praise results in a hiss against your chest and an aggressive press of his cock before he slithers down to the apex of your thighs. Wooyoung kisses your clit over the material of your panties, sucking against the fabric to tease you while his thumbs find their way under the band at your hips. A strangled moan rings out when he licks a slow strip up your covered cunt. 

“Go ahead, baby. Want you to taste me.” 

Lifting your hips to help him is moot as Wooyoung rips the crotch of your panties open, the elastic waistband still cutting across your hips. You’d reprimand him for the way he shreds such a loved pair of underwear but you're so desperate for relief you don’t care especially after such a primal display of strength. 

He wastes no time diving right back in, lathering you in his spit as he tastes all you have to offer. The sheets under your hands threaten to rip as you whimper from the overwhelming zaps of pleasure Wooyoung provides. His nose nudges your clit before his tongue lashes against the bundle of nerves, two fingers rising to stretch you for his cock. All your muscles pull tighter with each pass, hips rocking into his skilled mouth as you rocket towards the edge.

“Feel good?” He asks, muffled by pussy.

Another harsh suck of your clit allows you to do little more than gasp in response. But Wooyoung seems disappointed with such a lackluster answer.

Rising from his new home between your legs, he twists his face in mock confusion. “What was that?”

Dazed, you lift your head to find him suppressing a shit eating grin as he looks up at you.

“Wooyoung!” 

“Just wanna know how to please you, ma’am.”

His fingers begin their rhythm again but Wooyoung lets his chin rest on your stomach while he waits for a response. There isn’t an ounce of the urgency previously drowning him in the hallway. Now, Wooyoung acts like he has all night to wait for your answer.

“Oh Youngie,” you moan, luring him in a false sense of security.

Everytime he thinks he’s a step ahead, you’re more than happy to knock him down a few pegs; eager to put him in his place. But your sudden agreeability makes him blanch when you continue. 

“You’re such a good boy wanting to take care of me. How about I show you just how I like it, yeah?”

Sliping from his hold, you push up the bed until your back is met with pillows. Wooyoung is still crouched at the side, gobsmacked at his failure. 

“You can’t see from over there.” you tsk, shaking your head as you remove your bra and ruined underwear. “Lay between my legs, Wooyoung.” 

Snickering as he scrambles to follow your command, you spread your legs apart; giving him a mouthwatering view of everything as his chest meets the comforter. Your swollen lips flushed from arousal, your dripping hole leaking down onto the blanket, and your clit peeking out from its hood—eager for relief. Face to face with your bare pussy, you preen under the awestruck expression on Wooyoung’s face. 

Skimming your hands down your body, you cup both your breasts; gently plucking your nipples till they’re hard and aching. Wooyoung’s follow their path, glued to everything they do to use against you later. Sliding them between your legs, you use one hand to part your folds while the other dips a finger inside. Collecting enough of your arousal, you circle your clit with soft caresses as you work yourself back up. 

Wooyoung’s face easily betrays all of his thoughts. Licking his lips with each twitch of your thighs, panting when a tiny moan flees your throat. At some point his hands move to the back of your thighs, spreading you wider so he can focus on your lesson. 

Your hands aren’t enough to have you come but Wooyoung doesn’t need to know that.

“So close,” you sigh dreamily.

“Can I…” 

His voice breaks, desperate to get back in your good graces and feel you again.

“Can you what?”

“Let me help!’ Wooyoung begs.

Laughing at how quick he is to fold, you keep talking. “I don’t know if you deserve it.”

“I’ll be good!”

Tsking, you stop his attempt to start without permission with a foot to his chest, pushing him away and onto his knees. “Such a shame.” you sigh, shaking your head. “Wanted to feel you inside me.” 

“Please,” he whimpers.

You watch him sweat, silent as your fingers continue. Wooyoung doesn;t even look at your face, transfixed on your clenching hole as he whispers another desperate plea for mercy.

“Well since you asked so nicel—fuck!” You shout, heaving as Wooyoung shoves your legs apart and latches onto your clit.

“Wanna make you come, please come. Please, please, please.” He pants into your sex, fingers stretching you to your limit as he stuffs you full for his cock later.

Everything tightens as your vision goes black. You’re floating. You’re sinking. Thighs shaking, ears ringing, you shudder apart while Wooyoung abuses your clit with rough motions. Throat destroyed by wanton moans and shrill whines because Wooyoung refuses to let up even though your thighs squeeze around his head from the painful bliss.

Wooyoung continues to ramble into your clit until you pull him into a searing kiss. Ignoring the taste of yourself, you suck his bottom lip between your teeth as you flip him under you with ease. Wooyoung goes without a fight, hands twisting around your middle to press you firmly against his chest.

Only the need for oxygen separates you.

“Good, so good.” You breathe, forehead resting against his.

Wooyoung glows from the compliment, hips curling up to nudge you with his neglected cock. 

Still disoriented, you know what he wants. “Should reward you, yeah?”

Wooyoung’s hands plant firmly on your hips, sliding you against the underside of his length. The flared head hits your sensitive clit with each pass to drive you up the wall.

“Are you clean?”

“Yes, fuck yes.” Wooyoung answers, thrilled at the chance to feel you without a condom. 

Reaching behind, you angle him and sink to the hilt in one go. His fingers were nothing compared to this. Squeezing around his cock as you adjust to the stretch, you could come again with a few passes at your clit while sitting there. Wooyoung’s inability to bite his tongue nearly makes you do just that.

“Gonna ride me or what?” He smirks, hands already planted on your hips as he thrusts upward.

Wooyoung will listen but he’ll also goad you to madness if you don’t silence him. 

Stuffing your soaked panties into Wooyoung’s mouth, you’re woefully unprepared for the wrecked groan he releases at your taste. He’s so incredibly responsive and it’s doing irreparable damage to your psyche. 

“You like gagging on my underwear like some slut?”

Wooyoung responds with another broken moan, throat displayed as he throws his head back.

“C’mon Youngie. I thought you—fuck—wanted to take care of me?”

Pinning his arms beside his head, you grind onto his cock until stars burst across your vision. Each bounce in his lap punches the air from your lungs. Wooyoung assists, burying himself a fraction deeper so you can feel him in your throat. Head thrown back, you release his hands in favor of scratching down his chest, nails catching against his dusky nipples to pull another muffled sob from the man below you.

Pulling your underwear from his mouth, you silence his protest with your lips; swallowing his hum of satisfaction to see you breaking.

“Oh, Wooyoung.” You shudder into his jaw, collapsing on his chest for him to take over.

Wooyoung doesn’t stop his pace as he twists you beneath him, legs framing his shoulders allowing him impossibly deeper. Hard and fast, teetering on painful but you love it. And when Wooyoung dips to take a nipple between his teeth you gasp.

“Fuck, gonna come.” 

Slipping a hand between your bodies to find your worn clit; each pass of your fingers has you squeezing around him.

Writhing beneath him, you try to keep your eyes on Wooyoung as he comes back into view over you. Lips swollen and hair a mess, you miss his taunt the first time he opens his mouth; watching him  There isn’t enough air in the room to keep you afloat as you fragment and splinter below. You can’t breathe. Darkness tints the edges of your vision, teeth grinding painful from the onslaught of pleasure. 

And it fans Wooyoung’s fire even more.

“Can’t even listen. Mad at me for not being good but you're just as bad.”

The dynamic has shifted for the final time tonight and Wooyoung is going to walk away victorious. You're in no position to try and argue your way above him. But it doesn’t mean you can’t try.

“Feels so good, Youngie.”

“Yeah? Love my cock, don’t you?” Wooyoung whines, eyes twisting shut as his head falls forward. “Gonna cum,”

“Gonna cum inside me? Fill me up? Let everyone know whose pussy this is?”

“Fuck.”

“C’mon Youngie, don’t you wanna let me feel it?”

Wooyoung manages a few more thrusts before he loses it, pace uneven and stunted from the sweatering clench of your pussy. The hot stickiness of his cum spills out of you with each thrust, trickling down between your ass cheeks to the bed. Shuddering in his hold, Wooyoung collapses on top of you, spent.

He shocks you with a surprisingly tender kiss as you catch your breaths, cuddling down into your chest with a finality that leaves you gaping.

“Next time you should tie me up.”

“Next time?” You ask.

“You didn’t think once would be enough did you?”

© highvern. copying/reuploading/translating my work anywhere is strictly prohibited.

[merupasse]

THIS IS EGREGIOUSLY LATE but i wanted to post what i made when the avatar academy was accepting applications. Here was my character submission!! i was very obsessed with the concept of metalbending to really stand out, and the idea of telekinetically controlling metal knives was just pretty cool tbh. The layout was inspired by the last airbender concept art pages (:

[jusiri]

Every now and again i have to remind myself that Tumblr hasnt actually made any particularly egregious changes to anything, its mostly cosmetic, and this is just the "i hate any changes" website

Like i dont like the layout change, or the permanent tumblr live button, but those are pretty damn minor

Meanwhile over on Instagram they took away dashboard being only the people you follow ages ago, its like a 90/10 ratio of suggestions to stuff you want

Theyre constantly changing buttons and layouts, the algorithm is some secret thing they don't want anyone to know about, and it changes every other day

Fyp is half videos, with no option for them not to autoplay anymore

Bot problems all over the place, filled with scam accounts and bigots

One of their more recent changes was to take away the option to sort tags by most recent

you can either see Top Posts or Recent Top Posts, and thats it, if your post doesn't get big, youre shit outta luck

Trying to curate your feed and interactions is next to impossible, you can like 1000 pictures in a tag you enjoy and get nothing, but watch 1 second of some shit you don't care about and its all youll get recommended, its a nightmare

And then Twitter is...... Twitter

I dont even know what's happening on tiktok, last i heard they were determining whether you were abusive or not based on eye tilt

Tumblr might be glitchy and broken, and a little pushy at times, but its 1000x more chill than anywhere else at the moment

Staff actually tells you things, i cannot stress enough how much communication we actually get with staff, other places staff consists of a bunch of cryptic people who dont wanna say anything to you ever and/or Elon Musk

If nothing else be deeply deeply grateful we do not have Elon Musk

Thats in and of itself is a true blessing

[coldgoldlazarus]

Given how much I bent normal Lego building and euclidean space into a pretzel with these masks, would you believe me if I said the main purpose of this was just to fiddle with color palettes and placement? Rambling details below:

But yeah, test designs of a more MoL-esque take on the GWP System Matoran design

I figure a proper do of system Bionicle would at least still have custom mask molds, so that's part of why that's so fucky

(Also, apparently it turns out the ball pieces I used for the shoulders and legs are long discontinued by lego and not actually compatible with mixel joints, RIP)

(Like I figured these were physically unbuildable anyway because I quickly gave up on trying to make the masks align with conventional euclidean space, and the coloration of pieces reinforce that further, but the problem goes deeper than I realized ^^; Ah well, this is more an aesthetic exercise at the end of the day.)

Rule was everyone has a primary color, a secondary color, a translucent/glow color, a metallic color, and an eye color

And those can double up in function, it doesn't have to be a full palette of five, but still that idea

And then like, the layout of said colors differs based on team:

---

For the Metru, the metallic color doubled as the secondary color and the eye and glow colors were also the same, cutting the five down to three, but then of course some Metru Grey at the joints as a pseudo-tertiary. The primary Metru Elemental color as more of a baseline, with the metallic secondary given a fair bit of prominence in reflecting their LomN and turaga designs, and then the glow kept to like, accents with low surface area. (In a more full figure I'd want that as like, basically Tron lines to add just a bit of cyberpunk to the Art Deco/Alien Dieselpunk vibes of Metru Nui.)

Also hadn't gone fully off the rails with the masks yet, so Onewa's Komau and Matau's Mahiki are still pretty simple at least, and the rest aren't too egregious yet. Decided to integrate Nuju's scope as a toa into his noble Matatu design, but it's easily removable if I copy-paste that mask over to others.

---

The Mata are pretty obviously influenced by their G2 incarnations. Particularly the like, three-pairs of shared metallic colors, (Gali and Pohatu with Gunmetal, Onua and Tahu with Pearl Gold, and Kopaka and Lewa with HF's Flat Silver,) and the like, glow color being the secondary while the secondary was relegated to more of an accent role. I just really love the idea of these six being so powerful compared to typical Toa that it shines out through the seams in their armor. For G2's other faults, I think it was a success on the character design front. (Also added their metallic color to the toes for a more armored look.)

(Decided on pink for Pohatu instead of G2's lime on a whim, but I think it works. Pink bands in a canyon wall, the sunset over a desert, and his love for his friends and villagers.)

Still, also brought things back to their original selves as well, with the eye colors, the use of black as a tertiary the same way I used grey for the Metru, the original brighter shades of their main for Gali, Pohatu, and Lewa, and similarly bringing back lime and tan as the latter two's accents.

As for how the accents were handled, I kinda split the team into two groups of three there; Tahu, Gali, and Onua, where the accent is from their G2 sets and thus goes for more of a high-contrast vibe, I relegated to the small parts again, to stand out without standing out too much. Meanwhile, with Pohatu, Lewa, where I brought back their G1 colors that are more of a light-shade complement to their primary rather than a contrast against it, I let occupy bigger pieces on their limbs, swapping position with the primary on their arms, and with their metallic on the legs. I also applied this layout to Kopaka, despite sticking with the Metru Blue from his G2 design, both for an even team split, and because I felt it wouldn't feel as weird with more prominence due to contrasting with the primary by being darker than it instead of brighter.

I kinda went nuts with the masks lmao. I feel like the Pakari in particular is kinda my crowning achivement, but probably not worth having spent so much time on it alone yesterday, and frustrating because I ultimately can't build it IRL from all the clipping. Still kinda like the moleman/gas mask vibes of how the eyes turned out. (Also went back and changed the Hau and Kakama near the end, to align better with the rest.)

---

With the Mahri, I was originally going to do the same three-pairs setup with their metallics, but then wound up opting to make those all fully personalized again like the Metru. Their main trick there instead, is being all chrome colors. Idk if it entirely lands for all of them, (I have mixed feelings on Kongu's pink instead of sharing blue with Matoro per original plan, but I didn't want to double up on only two of them and leave the rest more scattered, and I was already too married to my choices for all them) but I kinda like how it turned out.

Instead, the three-pairs setup applied to their glow colors, which I pulled from their Inika forms; the Zamor spheres and the flashing lights on their weapons. The one case where adherence to this also feels like a mixed bag is Hewkii's red going with the green chrome I gave him, giving a bit of accidental christmas vibes instead of the copper patina look I was trying to invoke, but ah well. In general, focused their glow in the shoulders and legs, both as a reference to Jaller and Matoro's translucent Inika "bone" pieces, and as a midpoint between the Metru's subtler use and the Mata's prominence.

---

Also on that note, in comparison to the prior two teams, I averted using any tertiaries like black or grey, made the metallics the most minimal parts, and really emphasized their flat secondaries as secondaries instead of accents. Same as the Mata, I split them into two different layouts for that, (which wound up falling along the same lines, not intentionally but that's how it worked out) based on whether their elemental color or personal color was the darker/brighter of the two.

(On that note, mostly went back to their Matoran color schemes with the more exotic colors, though for Hahli and Jaller favored their Mahri color schemes instead, and tweaked Kongu's lime to be Apple Green instead. Those, and Hahli's mask, are the cases where I permitted myself to not force an even split among the team, for the sake of everyone looking best individually instead.) For all of them, the brighter color always went to the stripe on the chest, while the darker went to the hands and feet; mainly the arms and masks where they're different.

For the left-hand side, where their personal color was bright and their elemental color was very dark, I opted to downplay the personal a little more on the arms, since it was instead prominent on their masks. Hahli being the exception, because a big block of lime would not have been a good look, and I really wanted its brightness to pop out from the underlayer of her otherwise very dark colors.

Also like what I did with Nuparu, having his orange mask intact overall, but keeping the sort of "internal" area of the sidevents and eyes black for contrast, again a bit of that moleman look to go with his gremlin inventor personality.

Then the other side, where the personal color and the color on the mask was darker, I instead let the brighter elemental one take prominence on their arms and the back of the torso, which also just ties in nice with the original clean mctoran color layout. Not as much to really comment on with them.

Also, I played fast and loose with their eye colors, since those were always homogenized some amount in each of their incarnations but inconsistent across them, and I wanted to maintain everyone having their own separate eye colors like the other two teams. (And the eyes being different from the glow color like the Mata.)

So Jaller now has dark blue and Kongu has azure; Hewkii's supposed to be apple green, (though as with Whenua, I had to use the same color as Onua's dark green, since this was the only green glow shade aside from lime that didn't just look washed out and/or too blue) while Nuparu is lime, since he alone was mostly pretty consistent in that. Hahli got red for her later Barbarian arc, while Matoro got a softer orange, both for contrast with the frosty blues of Nuju and Kopaka, and just cozy vibes to match his kinder personality.

---

So, yeah. Clearly a good use of the past two and a half days lmao.

May also do Takua and the Chronicler's Company, the Disk Metrutoran, and maybe even the Voya Nui resistance team at some point? Though for now, need to focus on other stuff I'd been distracted from by this.

[ofmdsalt]

Do you think the fandom will come back, even somewhat, over time? You mentioned taking a break and coming back and while I personally don't think I will nor will other fans who have been harassed and hurt, maybe new people discovering the show in a couple of years will have a different/healthier take on fandom. Basically do you think time will fill the canyon and/or future fans will be able to make this fandom into something less toxic? Or the writing of S2 especially was egregious enough so the legacy of the show is basically fucked and never stood a chance?

hey anon! i'm sorry to hear about your experience within the fandom. it sucks that a place that is supposed to be fund and creative can turn into such a high school cafeteria, complete with all the bullying and clique behaviour.

i cannot speak for everyone's experience within this fandom, those who remain and continue to seek ways to curate a space for themselves and those who had to leave because it was no longer a positive space for them to be in.

i think it's unfortunate that such a positive show has to happen in one of the most turbulent and unsustainable eras of television. streaming culture and binge watching ruin the longevity of TV shows, and modern fan culture is too obsessed with consumption. OFMD came out during a time when a lot of things are in flux

new people joining the fandom will certainly bring new perspectives and have less baggage than the current bunch of fans, and i honestly wish the best to those who join to create new things.

the idea of the Canyon has done irreparable damage and harm to this fandom. it's become a convenient scapegoat, a label to slap someone with that you don't agree with.

didn't get into a zine? well one of the mods is a Canyonite.

someone writes Izzy as sympathetic or neutral in a Gentlebeard fic? well the writer is clearly a Canyonite.

in these instances, it becomes a conspiracy. it becomes a valid excuse to very weird about someone online. and this goes for both sides of this conflict: Gentlebeardies and the Canyon. i just think it's more weighted against the Canyon because, well, their ship won despite the fact that there was never any contest because it was always assured that Ed&Stede would come out on top. the fact that other people complain about other ships like Stizzy, Edizzy, and Steddyhands (always about these three which really tells you what this group is more focused on)

my final thoughts on this is that both sides have created their own block lists, but the Gentlebeardies side is less willing to admit that they are in their own canyon. the only way to really end this is to stop talking negatively about Izzy. stop doing ship war shit. there is so much more joy people get out of fandom if they curate it into a positive, uplifting experience rather than falling into this clique high school behaviour

as for people's reactions to s2, i think what will happen is something similar to BBC Sherlock s4. that season was written poorly and as fans came back to reflect on their experience with the show to realize it had always been written poorly. s1 of OFMD is still solid TV and there are parts of s2 that are good, and fans will do what they have always done. take the parts that are good and build off of them, take the parts that are bad and transform them into something good. or continue to engage in AUs and make something new. that is the positive transformative experience of fandom. but with the uncertain future OFMD, if it will ever get picked up for something new, means that some fans will look back on it and realize that s2 was a let down.

the legacy of OFMD has already made its mark, but the toxicity and the entire Save OFMD campaign will leave a bitter, sour taste in some fans mouths, and that will be part of the fandom's legacy until the bitter end. the abandoned fics with final chapters that layout harassment people faced and why they can no longer continue.

i don't blame the fans who've left. i only wish it could've been on their terms rather than feeling like they were forced out

[internet-girl-friend]

No Fun City

Being a Vancouver transplant from Edmonton, Alberta, I feel resentment when people refer to Vancouver as No Fun City. The only thing this tells me about the people who say this is that they're boring.

They must never have had to find fun in someone's mom's mini van that they borrowed to drive around for the night only to end up in the mall's abandoned parking lot after-hours listening to their fellow suburbanites freestyle. Or in someone's weird uncle's basement watching him feed his illegal snake a live mouse. As a teen, the main event of my night was often going to 7/11 with Chloe, my childhood bestie, before we hunkered down to watch Burlesque for the hundredth time. Sometimes my friends and I would go to house parties and bush parties, other times we would bus to the city and hang out at the mall until we'd stolen all we could fit in our second-hand, falling-apart-at-the-seams Guess bags and needed to flee the scene. Drugs never really became my thing but I know in a place like where I am from they became seemingly everyone else's. So then, realistically, shouldn't I be having less fun than everyone else who's high? Idk.

Concerts I wanted to see rarely came to town, the closest lake was give or take an hour away and would probably give you a yeast infection or something if you swam in it, and any cool event that was happening required a car to get to because buses usually just... didn't show up. I'll put it this way: I love Edmonton dearly, and I still left.

No Fun City, as a concept, doesn't exist only because of Vancouver locals who have been spoiled rotten by easy access to concerts and beaches and good public transit, though. It exists for a number of additional reasons, too. Like the insane nightlife bylaws, the exorbitant cost of living, the struggle of making friends, the egregious display of wealth disparity, the (allegedly) shit weather, and the geographical layout of the city. These are all, in my opinion, weak excuses for the fact that in spite of all of them (which affect me massively, too) I am still having a really good time. If the city truly were that bad, it would be spoiled rotten by even one of these factors.

Maybe my mind will change once I've been here for a little longer, but I want to remember my life here with excitement.

This blog is going to be dedicated to documenting all the Fun I manage to have in No Fun City (and probably a couple other places too)

Now I need to go back to packing -- I kinda got evicted.

[ashenthorns]

God I'm so tired of social media (and the internet in general) as run by capitalism. The constant whittling away of features, the concessions made to appease advertisers and platforms, the hamfisted attempts at injecting functionality that no one wants or needs, the fucking mimicry as every website slowly becomes indistinguishable from each other in an attempt to replicate the success of other platforms that people use for different reasons. The old monoliths are crumbling, we are experiencing the internet that many of us here have known for most of our lives die as it becomes clear the foundations of these platforms were never sound to begin with, because they will always prioritize what's profitable first, and what people actually need and want second.

Honestly I find Tumblr especially egregious. The site has basic features that are broken, people have been begging them to reverse their policies regarding 18+ content for more than half a decade, they parade around the idea that they're this queer haven while their content flagging algorithms are openly hostile to queer people (and ESPECIALLY trans people) for merely existing. People's fully clothed selfies are getting flagged, text posts that aren't in any way sexual get marked as "mature" if it contains trans subject matter. This layout change is honestly just the cherry on top of the fucked-up-website sundae. They are pushing everyone who ever enjoyed this fucking website away, and they somehow have the fucking audacity to beg, plead with people to buy their dumb crabs or checkmarks, or pay their ransom to remove ads from the site. If you've been here since high school and stayed for its unique features, if you're queer and trans and use this site 'cuz it has a large queer userbase and you can connect with other people like you, guess what? You're not profitable and staff doesn't want you.

[fictionkin-culture-is]

Fictionkin culture is going on pdb for shitz and gigglez and seeing your kintype being so mischaracterised that you spend the rest of the day trying to figure out what's the correct typology layout for her. The most egregious thing is that she was basically regarded as either *another character* lite when they're not even close or was being called bratty (won't touch this opinion with a 10-foot pole)

Fictionkin culture is!

[corpsegirlmeat]

after getting a chance to play them all again during BIG big run, heres my tierlist for which stages i like best, more thoughts below the cut

starting at the bottom with undertow. high tide is ok, the super far right static spawns are annoying but not all that awful, mid tide is id say a little bit meh too but honestly not all that much, its really low tide that just fucking sinks it all the way to the bottom, you know why, things spawning from every direction, the harsh middle divider that makes it awkward to move around, it just SUCKS AND I HATE IT!!!!!!! low tide undertow is the worst salmon run map/tide in existence. at the end of every wave i get concerned i might be put back in the fucking pit

wahoo in d tier because its better than undertow but it still definitely has its problem. mid tide is fine, snatchers are almost always really good for getting those far eggs and its mostly enjoyable, but low and high tide are where my like for it falls. low tide everything spawns very far away and unless everyone is coordinated in keeping things lured at the beginning things get jammed and lots of eggs get dropped pretty far from basket. this didnt happen a lot in my play sessions (even through freelance), but when it did happen it was rough to make it up. and high tide leaves you with i think the least space of any high tide in the game. yes barnacle high tide is very small too, but wahoo's flat circle with 2 unpaintable bridges really leaves you with so little to work with, that its so easy to get overwhelmed. this goes especially so on grillers and glowflies, with no easy place to stand or lure them through, you really need a lot of coordination to make it through those waves smoothly and/or with high egg counts. it can be a Fun Challenge, but more often than not i find myself dreading it more than enjoying it

inkblot is id say a pretty alright map. i like the ample space youre given and the ramp you can use to kite the salmonids through. mid tide is ok, changing the ramp to stairs was really detrimental to it though. before it was much easier to bring bosses directly up, or even run eggs when they got piled up in the lower section, but changing it to stairs makes everything a lot more difficult. with good snatchers its not so bad, but more often than not theyre working against you and you have to be way more proactive about running eggs.

eeltail is really where i start to enjoy things. i like the large walls and open space you have during mid tide. there arent too many bad spawns besides the sneaky stinger that can show up behind basket or the drizzler spot behind the right wall. but i especially love being able to toss a bomb from down below up onto the grate for the flyfish ohko, its so incredibly satisfying. low tide im a bit indifferent about, but i think its enjoyable. high tide is really what gets it up here. i loooooooove high tide, its so easy and cozy. the easy flyfish ohko on the left ramp, the way all the salmonids easily funnel themselves through, the fact that snatchers are always good, the raise right side for better vantage spots, its very enjoyable to me

barnacle and umami are both extremely close and i think the overall best bigrun maps. barnacle mid tide is very chill to me, theres no real egregious static spot. lids are also so useful here, if theres a flyfish on the left side it can often get easily crushed by a lid, a lid usually parks on the ramp going up to the center on the right and just triggering it over and over to crush everything that walks through there is really satisfying. high tide barnacle is what high tide wahoo stays up late at night wishing it was. its tight and compact, but the layout makes it much more bearable than wahoo. and barnacles low tide is kinda just the same as eeltails high tide, its very easy and very cozy.

and finally umami. umami mid tide is like barnacle/wahoo high tide, but you actually have space to move around. the raised center gives you a decent vantage point and lets you escape the direct path of most bosses. fish sticks and stingers are never in that bad of spots, the only real bad spawn i think is the possible flyfish over grates. i really like umami mid tide. umami low tide is really interesting to me because i think its like the only map where the spawns come down from Above you? while not always the easiest i think it can be really fun. i think The Pit on the right side is fun and novel. Lastly Lastly umami high tide. do i really need to say anything about it? everything dies here so easily. everything steps out of the water into an instant meatgrinder and gets splatted so fast. the spawns are so close to basket that most weapons can reach bosses right away. its just the easiest, most Turn My Brain Off map out of all the big run ones. i dont know if ive ever lost a wave on it. its just fun and good and well designed and i like it :) thank you for coming to my squedtalk

[minthara]

ok I'm gonna be real when you first said someone was copying you I was a little on the fence bc I thought it was probably an accident but no that is EGREGIOUS. literally format for format and caption for caption. across so many gifsets?? And when you don't put a caption on he can't think of one himself!!!!

yeah like i super open to getting inspired by other people theres absolutely nothing wrong with it, ive taken others layouts too? but i always credit :(

[gerardpilled]

the most egregious thing lindsey has directly done is plagerize the getting down the germs cover 🤷 to be clear, fucking stupid when people take this actual case to call her transformative work (like collage or references) plagiarism as well. another case of people appropriating a real fault for their own sexist, obsessive agenda

this is something that has always kinda caught my attention but i never looked further into it until this ask lol. A few months back i did go through a bunch of lindsey hate blogs to see what the talking points were and this one did seem like an actual valid one... except I just found out that the person who made the original isn't even really an artist...

If you don't know, people noticed that the getting down the germs cover art Gerard said was painted by Lindsey had a layout that closely resembled this petri dish photo:

The photo was originally posted by Biochemist Antoine Bridier-Nahmias in 2012 on his tumblr here. When you google his name you find out he is a professor of Biochemistry and actively publishes research. He didn't post much, but in a few asks he describes his work as more of a collection of life that becomes art. You can totally call me out on being too nice here but knowing this, what she's done kinda feels pretty transformative to the original? Yeah she should have credited the photo that inspired her but then again... Gerard was the one who wrote the post LOL he also never said she designed.

So little was actually said about the art, we have no idea if the exchanging of approval was made between Nahmias and her. Idk a lot of assumption to base hatred off of imo

[ask-mortarion-the-death-lord]

Some Thyrrus headcannons i came up with on the spot

they're experts with plasma weaponary and theoretically can produce some of the best most powerful and safest plasma weapons in the entire galaxy. That wouldn't be fun though so all thyrrus plasma weapons, aside from having rgb lighting options, can also be overcharged until they inevitably explode catastrophically. if a thyrrus manages to get a shot off before it explodes in that state the damage is exponential and thyrrus 'gunslingers' in so much as they have that concept pride themselves on being quick enough to fire a shot with enough room to let the weapon cool back down. the true masters can even fire more then one shot. usually two.

being weird jellyfish squid things not only are they experts in cloning technologically but in biological cloning methods as well. however, contrary to imperial speculation and prejudices on the matter this has nothing to do with why thyrrusians have absolutely no regard for their own casualties and in fact each thyrrusian clone is considered a wholly unique sentient independent entity with all the rights any non cloned thyrrusian is entitled to in thyrrusian society.

thyrrusians do infact wear cloths, very elaborate and gaudy ones at that, but because of the biological material used to make their cloths imperial observers thought for the longest time thyrrusians did not wear them.

imperial command finds thyrrusian scouts and infiltrators particularly egregious to let slip through, not strictly because of the damage that can incur but because thyrrusian infiltrators and scouts exclusively array themselves in bright neon colours of particularly obnoxious palettes. most famously during early contact with thyrrus infiltrators an entire company of militarum tempestus were executed for 'failing to spot the flaming hot pink squidies', only for said flaming hot infiltrators to successfully eliminate imperial command of the theatre before blowing up imperial fuel reserves with a thermonuclear device. surprisingly what research has been conducted into how this is possible suggests that somehow the use of said neon colours is what makes them so effective.

thyrrusians being highly individual creatures tend to go into battle adorned in personal colours and garments then any strict regimentation of uniform. particularly powerful thyrrus leaders however will tend to have direct subordinates adorned in matching colours then not.

thyrrus cities are near impossible to invade, partly because of location as thyrrusians being such deceptively hardy people can and in fact are eager to build in highly deadly locations, but also because thyrrusian architect tend to ignore rational practices and layouts, ontop of their being no recognizable patterns in design principles outside of shared visual culture. even then what looks like a power plant or factory in one city might just be the local theatre or an art gallery in another. thus it is easy to get lost and disorganized in such a settlement which leaves invaders as easy pickings for thyrrus warriors and city defence networks.

well they might not look like it thyrrusians are highly deadly in close combat possessed of not only an erratic gracefulness of movement but deceptively powerful arms and tentacles along with their deceptively resilient bodies. a particular favoured close combat weapon of thyrrusians are electromagnetic ones fashioned into all manner of over designed weapons and dazzling in similar rgb lighting as their plasma guns.

thyrrus space ships tend to be ovular or circular in dimensions looking not unsurprisingly like giant jellyfish or squids albeit ones painted up in a multitude of colours with all manner of ancillary weapons and supports systems. popular thyrrus ship weapons tend to unsurprisingly be plasma or electromagnetic based, but one particularly noticeable ship weapon is the 'electriray discharge ray' a weapon that effectively fires a supercharged lightningbolt at enemy ships causing havoc in the form of power surges resulting in catastrophic and explosive ship malfunctions. that it is most effective at close ranges seems to be part of the point of its design. thyrrus warmachines and vehicles tend to follow similar principles.