#this mostly just came up bc i'm trying to figure out what makes me happy & how i can make myself do self care

[kalashtars]

so my bed is pretty high right, and there's nothing underneath it. like it's fully a crawl space. anyways so for a while now i've been thinking about putting a blanket down there and some pillows, maybe fairy lights and things and just make a space that is small and dark. tell me why i only just now realized i've been thinking for weeks about building a fucking nest.

[runningfrom2am]

cold nights // part fourteen

summary: you showed him colours he knows he can't see with anyone else.

pairing: coriolanus snow x fem!reader

wc: 3.1k

masterlists / nav / requests

tags/warnings: tribute!reader and mentor!coriolanus, r is very sweet (too kind for this world. literally.), sunshine x grumpy trope kinda, he falls first, violence typical for the source material, r is very smart (as she should), district twelve!reader.

a/n: finally reunited ahh!! (also a note from me while i'm trying to find pics for the header: damn this dude does not look happy very often huh) (okay so update we're settling for a flashback photo bc coryo in his curls era does not SMILE bruh)

my asks are also open to talk about this series! (i do have emoji anons open now too!)

send me any and all of your thoughts! here!

series masterlist // playlist

"Just right here." Lucy Gray stops on the gravel road, nodding up to the house in front of them.

"Okay, sweet." Sejanus smiles, already heading for the front porch but she grabs his arm, stopping him as Coryo just stares at the house, going slightly pale.

"Sejanus, how about you and I go figure out where you guys will stay, and come back for Coriolanus in a bit?" She offers, nodding toward him.

"Oh- uh, yes. Yeah. Good idea." He agrees, picking up quickly on what she meant. Coryo still hasn't said a word, just staring at the run-down shack that apparently was your home. It was clear that efforts were made to maintain the home, the fence had been patched in several places and there were flower beds outside. From what he knew about your family, that would make sense.

"Coriolanus?" Lucy Gray draws his attention again. "We're going to go find you a place to stay, and we'll come back for you in a bit. Does that sound okay?"

"Yeah that's... that's perfect. Thank you." He nods, in a trance-like state as he makes his way up to the door through some only slightly overgrown grass, before he has the chance to second-guess himself.

"He didn't even listen, did he?" Lucy Gray says, both of them watching him from the street.

"Not at all, no."

He can hear the two of them chatting as they disappear back down the road, and he looks for a doorbell that doesn't seem to be there, just settling for a knock instead. He waits a few moments after knocking on the wood, about to do it again when he hears a woman's voice come from inside. "One moment, I'll be right there!"

"I got it, Ma!" Comes from right behind the door as footsteps approach and it's swung open, a young boy standing there. "Hi." He says, eyeing Coryo up and down. It must be your brother.

"Uh, hi." He clears his throat. "Is Y/N here?"

"No, not right now." The boy answers. "Can I take a message for her?"

"Oh, well, my name is Coriolanus Snow, and-"

"Hold on! I'm coming!" The woman's voice comes again, much more excited as she rounds the corner from the hall, brushing her hands off on her apron. "You're Coriolanus?" She asks, a polite but delighted grin on her face as she gets closer.

"Yes, Ma'am." He nods in confirmation, a smile growing on his face. You look so much like your mother.

"Oh my goodness, come in, please! I didn't recognize you!" She gently moves her son out of the way, who is still staring at him with something unwelcoming behind his eyes. As soon as Coryo steps into the home, she's wrapping her arms around him in a hug. "Wow, it is so lovely to meet you! You came a very long way!"

"I did." He chuckles, hugging her back with as much politeness as he can muster behind shaking hands and a pale face.

"Come sit, Y/N will be home within the hour. She'll be just thrilled to see you." She pulls away, gesturing for him to follow her into the living area. "Are you hungry? You must be starving. Let me grab you something."  Your mother says, mostly to herself as he sits down on the couch.

"That would be great, thank you." He smiles, still nervous as he tries to adjust his posture on the slightly uncomfortable sofa, looking around. In reality, he hadn't been "starving" for some time now. It felt good to have a consistently filled fridge all the time, but he has hardly eaten since they left the Capitol. He was too nervous to even think about it.

"Why did you come here?" Your brother asks, making Coryo look away from the family photos that adorned the walls. Most of the frames were broken, photos blurry, but he could tell that to your family that didn't matter.

"I hadn't heard from her. I wanted to make sure she was doing okay." Coryo answers, stiffened by your brother's somewhat hostile energy and the thought of getting to see you so soon. Had you told him something you didn't tell your mother? Probably that he killed that boy, but it seemed unlike you to leave out the part where he had no choice. Unless Tigris was wrong.

Unless you still didn't see it that way.

Your brother hums, sitting in the chair across from the couch and leaning his elbows on his knees. To Coryo, this felt like an interrogation. Coming from a teenager, it was almost cute.

"Lennox, Honey, can you come help me for just a moment?" His mother calls him from the kitchen and he's shooting up again, glaring at Coryo as he walks away. He was confused, today alone he's gotten so many mixed signals on your feelings.

You stuck out the day at work, even though while you were reshelving returns you had to rush to the bathroom in the back to vomit after reading the back cover of an old book about a man who hunted humans. You were hoping by now this would happen less and less, but leaving the house had only made it worse. Getting a job was a mistake and you knew that, but your family was hardly scraping by before you were torn from your life- but neither of your parents could work the whole time you were gone. They were sick about it. Your mom still couldn't work, and you knew your father rarely ever slept these days.

You tried to hand over the winnings Coryo's Dean had given you as soon as you got home, holding it out to your parents with trembling hands as they opened the locked door for you. They wanted none of it. Not a dollar from your three thousand, which you had spent time counting and recounting on the train. They only wanted you home. You had hoped it would give you something else to talk about- that you could smile and be proud that you won and that now your family could live comfortably, at least for a little while. The idea almost made it worth it. As you counted your prize under the dim lighting in the train car, you had wondered if you would do it again for them. The money didn't make saying hello again any easier, though, and you cried for what must have been hours on the porch of your family home, the four of you tangled together in a hug bound together by tears.

It was hard to let go, but when they had, finally, your mother shoved the money back into your pocket and told you to save it. One day, you could buy your own home with it, and that wasn't a bad idea.

All you could do for them now that your money sat in a jar in your closet, the best you could do, was convince them you were fine enough for you all to move on and forget about it. The additional income of getting your own job helped, too. So, when your boss tried to send you home, you declined, and five o'clock couldn't have come fast enough.

You drink water out of an old jam jar on the way home, washing the taste of bile out of the back of your mouth. The fresh air made a world of difference. As much as you adored the smell of books, it got stuffy in there, especially in the summers. Even with the sun beating down on your shoulders over your button-up shirt, you felt better just making the walk home every day. The breeze blowing through the trees, the familiar paths beneath your feet, it was one of the very few things that could ground you in the reality that now, you were safe. That, and the meadow behind your house at night time. Reading under lantern light with the stars overhead and your family at your side, you never felt more real. It was truly over.

That's what you would do tonight, you decided, after a long nap following an unfortunate day. At the end of every unfortunate day, you still had that, and that meant the world to you.

"Oh! Here's Tybalt." Your mom smiles, now comfortable on the couch next to Coriolanus as the cat saunters into the living room, jumping up into the space between them. "This is Y/N's cat, she calls him Tybs." She explains, tears forming in her eyes as the cat crawls onto her lap and she quickly blinks them away, but he had already noticed by then.

"She told me about him." Coryo says, placing his now empty tea cup on the coffee table in front of them.

"Of course..." She chuckles sadly. "He took real good care of us while she was away. On particularly... hard nights," She clears her throat. "He would come out into the living room with her father and I and sit with us, he can purr like no ones business, you know, and then after a while, he would run over to our room there and meow at us. Made sure we got to bed. Then curl up with us and just made sure we knew that.... she was still with us."

A tear falls as she speaks and she laughs nervously, quickly brushing it away. "Gosh, I am so sorry..." She quickly dismisses it. "We have company and I'm crying like a little girl. Forgive me..."

"No, it's quite alright." Coryo insists, shaking his head. Of course, he was worried about you in the arena and every night up until then, but he never entertained the idea of what it was like for your family even though he knew about them. That under the same sky, they were sitting here in this very home praying that you might return. Now, he could see it, and you were the lucky one who made it home. He hoped he wouldn't have to see Jessup's family while he was here. "It must have been awful for you."

"Indeed." She nods, wiping her cheek again. "But, you know, it means so much to us that she had someone there to look after her." She smiles at him. It's genuine. Sad, but full of gratitude. He would no longer wonder where you got that habit from. "I decided I wouldn't be watching anything, but her father insisted. He was out at a bar in town, the only one with televisions, then came rushing back in the door twenty minutes later and dragged us back there with him to watch. I didn't want to go but he said 'No, you need to see this. She's not alone. She has a friend.' So down we went, and they were playing reruns of the two of you being dropped into that cage. I just... She looked so comfortable with you. The way you looked at her we could see you cared, that she was human to you, and that you were there to help. I remember thinking for the first time that maybe she had a chance." She's accepted her tears now, reaching over from petting Tybalt to grasp the young man's hands in her own as she spoke.

Your brother scoffs as Coryo lets her hold onto his hands, a small smile forming on his face that's quickly torn away by Lennox's reaction. "Yeah, and then that other boy had to be the one to bring her something to eat after days."

"Hey!" Your mother gasps. "Lennox, get-" She prompts him to leave if he isn't going to be nice.

He rolls his eyes, getting up to leave.

"I didn't have anything to bring her besides a flower." Coryo finds himself stating, shocking even himself at the confession which halts your brother in his steps. He had never told anyone about the poverty he faced at home, but with them, he felt safe to. Something about knowing you assured him that they were not judgemental people. He clears his throat before explaining. "My family lost everything after the war. When I first met her, I also hadn't eaten in days. I gave her everything I could."

Lennox hums before leaving, either not convinced or embarrassed that he'd even made such a comment. Coryo couldn't tell.

"Coriolanus... I am so sorry." Your mother is quick to apologize, and he's embarrassed by the look of pity in her eyes. Pity from a woman who had, for almost a month, believed she had lost her child, and was still struggling with it today. He felt nothing but guilt.

"Well, I must tell you, your daughter saved us from that." He tries to lift her spirits as a confused expression paints itself into her features, but he doesn't get the chance to elaborate as they both turn at the sound of the front door opening.

"Ma!" You call out, closing the door behind you and kicking off your shoes, preparing your smile to tell her about the absolutely great day you just had.

Your mother stands quickly, patting the boys thigh gently and wipes her eyes. "Hi, Honey, how was your day?" She asks, smiling at him through red eyes.

"Come what come may, time and the hour runs through the roughest day." Your groaned response comes slightly muffled from the other room, and Coryo can hear you shuffling about.

"Oh, no. What happened?" Immediately your mother's tone shifts to worry, and Coryo wonders how it took her less than a second to understand.

"Nothing, Ma. All is fine." You call back, putting your bag down in the kitchen, and heading for the living room, gluing a smile back on. "Guess what I saw on the walk home! A ladybug, it landed right on my-" You freeze as you walk into the entryway, seeing your mother and your previous mentor just standing up next to her.

"Oh, I should have mentioned, we have company." Your mother smiles, already gathering the used dishes from the coffee table, and brushing past you to bring them into the kitchen. Likely, to give you two a chance to talk.

When Coryo lays his eyes on you for the first time again, he can swear his heart stops. Yours definitely does as nausea comes over you in a wave again, and your calculated smile drops.

You don't say anything, just staring with an expression unreadable to him. "Y/N, hi." He breathes, smiling at you. You look beautiful but tired, still. Still, that girl he watched in the arena, it was hard to believe that every part of you made it out. You weren't the same girl he saw for the first time in the reaping- you were more. More of you, and more of something else; hurt, if he had to guess.

"It's good to see you." He continues, his voice a gentle whisper that cuts through the awkward tension in the room. Your heart races, emotions swirling like a tempest within you. Coriolanus Snow, your mentor and friend who had guided you through your time in that Capitol and the games, is standing in your living room, looking both apologetic and hopeful.

"Coryo," You manage to say, voice barely above a whisper as you swallow the sickness rising in your throat. The memories flood back- everything awful you had gone through. Meeting him for the first time as he handed you a flower, sitting on opposite sides of the bars of your cage and talking long into the nights. Everything you had done, everything he had given you, the people you both hurt in the process. He takes a step closer, cautiously navigating the fragile space between you.

"I... What are you doing here?" You ask quietly, your eyes unable to meet his gaze. The room feels smaller, the walls closing in on you quickly.

He clears his throat, a nervous habit you remember well. "I wanted to see you," he says, his eyes pleading for understanding. "I didn't know what you were up to and how you were adjusting and... I was worried about you."

The weight of unspoken words lingers between you, and for a moment, neither of you knows how to bridge the gap that only a month of time has built. You had been away from him longer than you had known him, and facing him again, you were embarrassed. Scared. Coryo takes a deep breath, summoning the courage to express the weight of what he's carried in his mind for too long.

"I never stopped thinking about you," He confesses, sincerity etched across his face. "I tried sending letters but I didn't get any response."

The vulnerability in his eyes mirrors your own, and the air crackles with a shared sense of everything you want to say but just can't find the words. You can't help it as you feel over and over again the countless hours spent together in the lead-up to the worst days of your life.

Tentatively, he reaches for your hand, a silent plea for connection. As your fingers take his, warmth floods through you, dissolving the distance. "I missed you," he admits, his voice barely audible.

A rush of conflicting emotions surges within you- that same embarrassment, anger, hurt, but also a flicker of the fondness that never truly faded. "I missed you too," You admit, your voice breaking through the emotional dam, built up from fear and trauma and the stacks of books in your bedroom that held it back all this time.

With those words, the barriers crumble, and the room is filled with a pitiful silence. The weight of what you had both done begins to lift, replaced with the realization that he did honestly care for you, the way you did for him. As you look into each other's eyes, the connection is undeniable, evidence of a bond that time could never change. You would always be connected to him.

"Do you remember when I brought you that blanket?" He asks and you take in a sharp breath. The few pleasant memories you had of your time together were so often overthrown by the awful ones, these days. His eyes flicker quickly across your face. He looks as scared as you feel. "And I said I wish I could get to know you as you are, not as a tribute, and you said you would show me the stars."

A small smile tugs at the corners of your lips as you nod, the nausea you felt steadily subsiding. "So you walk softly and look sweetly and say nothing. I am yours for the walk and especially when I walk away."

Coryo tilts his head at you, and smiles. That must have been a yes. "Please, don't walk away again." He whispers, and in that moment, he feels the tightness in his chest that carried him through the last month finally release.

taglist: @soulessjourney , @that-veela-girl ,  @dreamyysouls, @rockstarbfs , @maysileeewrites , @baybieruth , @kitscutie ,  @fratboyharrysgf0201 , @totallynotkaibiased , @stelleduarte , @secretsicanthideanymore , @bejeweledreverie , @drewsandsebastianswife , @niicole-87 , @queenofshinigamis , @innercreationflower , @nallasstuff , @scorpiolystoned , @iovemoonyy , @thatmarvelchick19 , @wearemadeofstardust0 , @regulusblackcore , @puredreamagination , @fantasticchaosthing , @becauseseaotters , @secretsicanthideanymore

okay suddenly tumblr isn't letting me tag more people than this so i just made some cuts unfortunately :') i just left the max amount of people i could whose users i recognized and see in my notifs all the time :) if you're not on here and you should be i'm so sorry!

also this taglist is closed now!! if you’d like to get a notification when i update, turn on my post notifications!! i promise i won’t spam y'all :,)

[thezombieprostitute]

Thoughts on sleepy prompt 33 with Lloyd? Not soft Lloyd, not dark Lloyd, just like, decent equal partner Lloyd?

…and possibly 12, too, bc that’s just so him

Lloyd's Soulmate - Drabble

"decent equal partner Lloyd"... I'm gonna have to channel @eulalielatibule 's Suburban Dad Sunday Lloyd for this because she's the best at writing this kind of Lloyd. That being said, I'm gonna go ahead and use my Soulmate Lloyd, but they've definitely settled in together.

A/N: this was mostly written on my phone!

Ask based on this.

33. “Look me in the eyes and tell me what time you went to bed last night.  Or if you went to bed, for that matter.”

12. “No offense, but you look like you haven’t slept in days.”

It's been almost a year since your soulmate, Lloyd, kidnapped you. The first few weeks were quite the learning experience for the two of you. It was a lot of tit-for-tat learning how to live with someone like Lloyd but the two of you actually made it work.

Go figure, Lloyd was an absolute softy for positive reinforcement which you were happy to give when he started respecting your boundaries and needs. The power dynamics were always in flux but both of you seemed to thrive on that. Arguing over what to watch was just foreplay.

Lately, though, you hadn't had the energy for arguing. You would give in to Lloyd a lot easier, which had him paranoid about retribution. Maybe it was depression? You were doing a lot more sleeping and eating. The latter was definitely affecting your figure but, thankfully, Lloyd didn't seem to care other than fully enjoying your bigger breasts.

Lloyd came back from a mission and found you groggily eating some ice cream on the couch.

"No offense, but you look like you haven’t slept in days," he says.

"No offense, but you like you need a shave," you snap back.

"If you really, truly want me to shave the clit tickler you beg to ride every night, I will," he threatens. "But I don't think you really want that."

"Yeah, you're right," you sigh. "I don't know what's wrong with me. I'm just always tired and hungry and my clothes aren't fitting anymore. Maybe I need a workout program or something."

Lloyd considers for a few moments before going to his phone.

"What are you doing," you ask.

"Checking the period tracker," he replies.

"You've been tracking my periods??"

"Well one of us has to! You have no idea how many headaches I've spared us both by making sure I know when to restock the chocolate."

You cross your arms and pout on the couch while he goes back to his phone.

"Shit," he mutters. You look up at him, eyebrow arched. He takes a deep breath, "you're late. And not just a few days late."

Your eyes widen, "shit, shit, shit! I need a test! Now!" You try to get off the couch but Lloyd gestures you to stay seated.

"I'm getting someone to pick some up right now," he soothes. "And, just to be certain, I'm getting you an appointment with Dr. Beck, okay?" He sits next to you and you immediately cuddle up to him, holding his arm in a hug.

"In the meantime," he smirks, "another way to test is to see if you taste differently."

"Lloyd, this is serious," you gently smack his arm.

"And I'm being serious," he tells you as gently pushes you onto your back. You grab him and pull him into a kiss, needing the comfort of his weight on top of you as your brain was frazzled trying to figure everything out. Maybe a good orgasm really would help, and Lloyd was damn good at giving you those.

Two positive pregnancy tests later you're now waiting on the Doctor's office to confirm or deny the results. You feel like you've been in a state of shock since the first positive test. Thankfully Lloyd has been doing the heavy work and the thinking. Making sure you're getting the medical checks you need, making sure you eat.

"We really should talk," you tell him over dinner.

"Absolutely, Sweetheart."

"Do you want the baby?"

"It'll be an adjustment," he admits. "But so were you. And I haven't been happier since I got you."

You chuckle at that. "But a baby? So soon?"

"I've got the means to take care of you both. You won't have to worry about a thing."

You put a hand over your stomach, "promise you'll treat them even better than you treat yourself?"

"I promise," he says without hesitation.

"Okay," you nod. "Then, when the doctor gives us confirmation, we'll go into full parent mode. Okay?"

"Of course."

A few days after the confirmation from the doctor you're starting to feel better. Getting proper nutrition, knowing what's going on, and not getting angry at yourself for your clothes not fitting were all very good for your mental health. You've even been getting better sleep.

Unlike Lloyd. You woke up from an actually good night's sleep to find Lloyd on his computer looking like he hadn't slept since he fucked you into a coma last night.

"Lloyd," you call, getting his attention. "When was the last time you slept?"

"I've been sleeping here and there. I'm fine." He waves you off.

You spin his chair so that he's facing you, "Look me in the eyes and tell me what time you went to bed last night.  Or if you went to bed, for that matter."

"If you're telling me you don't remember what we did in bed last night I'm running you to the emergency room, Sunshine."

"You know what I mean, Lloyd."

"I'm doing research. I've never been a parent before so I want to make sure to get some intel."

"You've got months to prepare. You don't have to push yourself this much this early." You stand up and cross your arms but that's when you see what's on Lloyd's screen. "Have you been buying baby clothes?"

"No! I've been getting ideas for my tailor! No way is our baby going to wear anything cheap!"

You laugh for the first time in weeks. A deep, big belly laugh. Lloyd is happy to hear it but also confused about what's so funny. You end up laughing so hard you have to sit on his lap as he holds you.

Finally catching your breath you tell him, "you really never do things half-assed, do you?"

Lloyd chuckles, "with an ass like mine? No way."

Tagging @alicedopey and @icefrozendeadlyqueen because I promised I would.

[raayllum]

i'm literally sitting here trying to figure out what EVEN i can SAY about aspec rayllum here? i think about them and i want to combust into heart emojis. i watched the first season when it first came out and then only happened to catch up last year with my qpp, and in between i was like. so infuriated when i found out they'd made rayla and callum a thing bc i - naturally - latched onto the green and purple character as an aroace icon at 18 years old, and my partner was like "no no no no TRUST me you've got to watch it, you'll love it"

they weren't wrong and after bingeing the whole show i'm stuck thinking about rayllum a LOT. they're written so much like my own ideal relationship that i kind of want to explode from it sometimes. anyway, my absolute favorite thing about them is how much emphasis there is about their friendship - to the point that when i watched season four, I can't remember which episode specifically it was number wise but when rayla suggested splitting up and offered to go with callum and he turns her down, my first immediate heartbroken thought was "she misses her best friend..." i just love how they're in love but they're in love cos they're best friends....11/10 no notes i need more relationships like that in media

ANYWAY long rambley ask about my loves aside, my question is what are some of your favorite moments where rayllum are so clearly best friends/goofballs in love?

No like honest to god though — me and the Rayla to my Callum are also in a QPR + dash of romance relationship and like... arc 1 and arc 2 Rayllum are just so goddamn sweet??

I don't agree generally that arc 2 Rayllum is more Mature™ than arc 1 rayllum — Callum is more patient and Rayla is more open, so they've matured as individuals — but merely just that they're different flavours of aspec-ness. Like arc 1 is the craziness and rollercoaster of meeting a stranger and realizing they're Your Person, and arc 2 is the deepness after the fact of "I know you, and I know that we can get through everyone so long as we have each other" mostly cause I think the main reason people label arc 1 Rayllum as more immature is because s3 Rayllum gushes over each other, but that's bc people have a hard time conceptualizing having deep admiration for your partner(s) that isn't infatuation... even though like? It's totally normal and welcome, like any long term relationship is "my partner is the most amazing person ever and i'm also very aware of all their flaws simultaneously" and like, arc 1 Rayllum hits that balance perfectly imo

I just love all of their stages and sides to them so so much

But yeah! Some of my fave moments Rayllum wise for the Best Friends quality has to be when they help each other up in 3x05 (Callum after the soulfang chase and Rayla on the ambler) because things are Weird but they're still always going to help each other? The "I missed my best friend" quality in s4 with no one laughing at Callum's jokes / talking about magic with him (vs their first scene in 5x01 being him telling her all about the magic stuff he's reading) and Rayla keeping her disappointment at bay always hits hard and I loove 4x06 when she's beating herself up and he takes care of her because a Good Relationship isn't about how you treat each other when everything's fine, it's 100% about how treat each other when life is hard/stressful and/or you're upset with each other

But I love all the gentle teasing in early S5 and the fist bump lives in my head eternally rent free. The 2x03 hug also means a lot to me cause that was the turning point she went from being a friend to being family and I think in a lot of ways, that's their relationship's most important turning point alongside maybe 1x06 (trusting her anyway!) 4x09 (forgiveness) and 5x04 (her opening up).

5x02 post-inn and stargazing scene are also faves just because of how happy they are talking about Nothing and everything, and like — that's just so fucking real, y'know? When someone makes everything automatically better just by being there

As Callum says, "We've been through a lot, and a lot has changed. Well, some things have changed, but not everything," and this never will

[iizuumi]

Oh the bodymerge is such a cool idea!! Big tail!!! I love him does his tail wag when he's happy?? Do you have any idea for any other bodymerges? Like with Reno or Naru perhaps? 👀 <- Narureno anon

BIG TAIL!!! I have been thinking and talking about this AU so much sometimes i forget it's not canon skdjfhsdf It should definitely wag when he's happy!! even though I still like to think that 10 has more control of the tail while hoshina keeps more control over his own body even in this body fuckery sort of way i've put them together now . So i think the tail is always very expressive just because 10 mostly uses it for expressing himself lmao he should also use it to hug his boyfriends <3 How did you know the endgoal is to have half kaiju boyfriends naruhoshireno skdjfhskfjh i definitely do have thoughts even though I still haven't figured out how i want to do the whole merge thing with them from a design perspective! but i'm excited to get there hehehe very tempted to give narumi some additional eyes ,,,, It's just so fun to think about everyone getting very concerned after they find out what happened to hoshi10 so ofc all the other numbers weapons users get flooded with medical exams to make sure this doesn't happen again but they're all still fine and nothing happens for a whiiile so people are slowly calming down again and coming to the conclusion this was just a hoshi10 thing because 10 was a weird kind of suit in the first place ksjdfhsf but it's just taking narureno a little longer to get there bc their suits aren't sentient 👀👀👀👀 want them to slowly start noticing the suit almost feeling sticky when they try to take it off ,,, maybe some weird skin discolorations that they pass off as bruises for a while but they're not bruises 👀👀👀 Hope they come to hoshina a little panicked like oh no it's happening to me as well KSJDHFSJFHSFH big thoughts I'll stop myself here but yes ,,, so many thoughts bouncing around my head Also gotta credit @acystreia for some of these thoughts because this has been happening in the DMs and i can't tell who came up with what at this point lmao

[lem0n-writes]

You should hmmmmmm write fatherly mercs NOW 👿👿👿👿👿

If u want to teehee

Mercs being Fatherly for you since yk ur fatherless and stuff also scout bc he’s ur lame brother

Scout

He isn’t really the person you’d want as a father figure, but he can definitely act as an older brother or just a sibling in general!

Scout also gives me fun but weird uncle, so if you want an estranged uncle who is pretty dumb, funny, and kind of rich??? then yeah he’s a good choice.

The kind of guy to watch sports and yell at the players even though he doesn’t know the rules, that’s so father of him

He would then proceed to try to teach you the sport, and he will fail.

You guys just end up playing catch in the yard, but y’all quickly abandoned the gear after Scout heard an ice cream truck

You walk home together eating your deformed character popsicles, Scout’s arm around your shoulder, and the sun setting

Heavy

If you need a father figure, you came to the right person

He had to be the ‘man of the house’ for a while since his father died when he was young, so he kind of gets how you miss that paternal relationship

He’s very good at comforting and helping you when you aren’t feel well or having trouble with things even though he doesn’t speak English very well

I think having three younger sisters contributed to that

When you guys get closer, Heavy starts watching you on the battlefield more and keeping you near him, just to make sure you’re doing ok

He worries about you even though you guys do this every day, but he just can’t help worrying for you!!

Heavy would read you books in Russian, even though you don't understand much of it, and it reminds him of reading to his sisters when they were younger

When you visit Medic, Heavy watches the doctor closely to make sure he doesn’t try implanting any animal organs that don’t belong, but don’t worry, Medic takes a liking to you too because Heavy likes ya :)

Engineer

Is it just me or does he just give me like childhood nostalgia? Might just be because I'm from Texas too

If you start sticking to him like a lost puppy, he'll quickly go with it. He'll be looking out for you on the battlefield even though you’re a smart kid

Engie will definitely teach you a bit about engineering if you're interested too! He's very happy to explain anything and everything, not only engineering stuff, but it'd lowkey just be him info dumping

He will update your weapons more often than the other mercs, but that also means you guys sometimes have little adventures trying to fix your weapons or hunting down the occasional bread monster herd

Y'all have fun though, and your weapon gets updates, so win win?

He reads stories to you and Pyro too, mostly fiction ones though like the Grimm Brothers' writing.

Speaking of Pyro, you two are basically siblings now, good luck. Engineer has a little nook for you two to hang out in while he works into the nights. If you and Pyro fall asleep there, he'll walk you back to your room, maybe read you a silly bedtime story if Pyro's still with you two, and wish you a good night

Medic

He’s a questionable choice for a father figure, but he's silly <3

You’d probably be in the infirmary or calling him a lot if he starts feeling protective of you, but he thinks it’s sweet that you always get your injuries taken care of in this line of work. Like if you get a paper cut, you make sure to slap a bandaid on it, y’all know what i mean?

I don’t know how to explain in a way that doesn’t sound weird, but Medic is weird so eh?

During battles, when he knows the Heavy is safe, he’ll run off to top off your health, even if you’re only down 5 HP, and he saves his Ubercharges for you and Heavy <3

But since you’re getting injured a lot, Medic decides to teach you some first aid past the basics

If you’re interested, he’d teach you more advanced biology and even let you assist in surgeries! You guys bond over spinning Scout’s organs around, and Scout is not happy about getting his lungs switched around with his kidneys

All this time in his medbay got his doves quite used to you, so they now have favorites, you and Heavy. Although, now sometimes Archimedes tries to sneak away from their dad to follow you

Heavy always brings Archimedes back to Medic after you give them treats

Spy

Oh boy

If Spy begins acting in a fatherly way towards you, you must be something special

And Spy doesn’t have the best track record with children, Scout and the kid from the Smissmas comic, however Spy does still care

It would mostly be shown through gifts or praise for your exceptional work, he’s just very proud of you!!

While you’re great and all, he still watches your back to keep you safe from energy spies, and she teaches you new tricks to surprise the enemy team

It’s a nice challenge for you while also bonding with your sort of father figure!

When you learn a new skill, he’ll be singing you praises to the team for the next few days and expect to find a shiny gift from them in your room that night

“Bien joué, you have done well this past week”

[cloudlessly-light]

Hii it's Anon again!

Yessssss I loved that fic bc of Em being in foreign territory and who can deny Hotch's dom energy in CM fr! I absolutely love reading fics playing with that side of him 😍💞

I'd love if you wrote another one where the story is more detailed about how Em starts daydreaming at work, having fantasies after Hotch raises his voice against a suspect/roughs them up physically with ease or disciplines the team like when Reid was about to insult someone at the phone and Hotch just stopped him just calling his name LOL (tbf there are a lot of CM moments where fans are like 'wow I'd love him to grab me like that/talk to me like that' that could be fun to insert these moments 😂)

But yeah, mostly abt Em being confused at her body's reaction and realising it is a very slippery slope she's on, with (the team and) Hotch thinking Em is just distracted until he realises she squirms or disappears after he behaves a certain way verbally or physically etc...

Cherry on top if you figure out a way to conclude that with smut, I wouldn't personally know how to write Hotch confronting her abt it since I imagined that mostly from Em's pov 😂

Anyway, that's my idea of it, I'm happy to know that you like writing this dynamic and I will be happy with ANYTHING you will write about dom Hotch in the end so no pressure, I'm excited for any idea you will work on 😁🩷

A/N: Hi Anon! I hope this is somewhat what you had in mind, it got way longer than I initially thought lol.

Title: To give to you Summary: Emily had never imagined fantasizing about her boss, had always thought she was a top. But then she joins the BAU and meets Aaron Hotchner and everything changes. Word count: 4,7k Rating: Explicit Warnings: Smut, oral, overstimulation, dom Aaron (kinda, it got softer than I thought) bisexual Emily Prentiss, switch Emily Prentiss, sub Emily, mentions of stabbing, mentions of restraints and paddles

Emily had known that she was bisexual early in life, realized quickly that she clearly had a preference for women. For a long time she only dated women, women were kind, smart, gorgeous, stunning beings and she absolutely relished in taking them apart. She spent her late teens and early 20’s exploring her sexuality and preferences. It was easy to figure out that she loved to be in control, loved to bring her partner to their knees, no matter what gender that was.

But there was no doubt that if she were to chose between a man and a woman, she always preferred a woman. There was something about hearing the gentle moan of her name, of feeling soft skin under the palm of her hands. She loved bringing them pleasure and sometimes that pleasure came with a side of pain.

Then she starts working at the BAU, a dream she’d had since joining the FBI. It doesn’t take long for her to throw herself into work all the while ignoring the fact that she barely has time to do anything else. She proves herself fast, knows that she’s impressing the team without really trying as they find out small pieces of her past, and her skills.

It sucks that Aaron Hotchner is one of the last to notice.

Her boss was an enigma to her, quickly stirring up feelings she shouldn’t feel towards her boss. The first time it happened she had tried to ignore it, tried to pretend that the feeling she felt and the flush when he raised his voice towards and unsub was because the interrogation room was stifling. It wasn’t him, it couldn’t be him.

It’s harder to ignore the second time it happens. He was frustrated, the case going awry quickly and Emily watched him instill fear in the entire police precinct as they were working with one single word, voice raised to be heard over the chatter. The tension on his face and the darkness of his eyes was enough to make goosebumps rise on her arms.

And she crashes into the realization that it was, in fact, him.

Then a year had gone by and Emily finds herself daydreaming about him at the most inappropriate times. It’s not like she hasn’t tried to stop, she’s gone out and found both men and women to take home during her time at the BAU. She has relished the feeling of power as she wrought pleasure from strangers in the dark. But then she goes to work the next day and for reasons unbeknown to her she can’t stop thinking about him. She’s smart enough to know that it isn’t just physical, that she felt more for him but just want, but she always forced those thoughts away.

“Prentiss?” Aaron interrupts her train of thought as she sits by her desk, seemingly lost in her own world.

“Yeah?” She looks up at him and bites her lip for a moment. Her cheeks heated from his stare as she realized she was caught zoning out. “Sorry, what do you need?” They were working from Quantico, helping out on a local case.

“They’re bringing in a suspect, I want you in there with me for questioning.” He gives her another pointed look, like he’s seeing into her mind and she has to force herself not to fidget in her seat.

“Of course.” She offers a smile that she hopes comes off as confident and he walks back into his office. Get it together Emily.

She misses the way his eyes linger on her from his office window.

*

She really doesn’t understand why she reacts the way she does to him. She had been around people trying to control her her entire life, had always hated it. It shouldn’t be different with Aaron. But it is.

She thinks it’s because he’s in control in a way that’s effortless, that he demands respect because he knows he’s earned it. And most importantly, she trusts him in a way she doesn’t really trust anyone. She loves him.

But that doesn’t stop her confusion. It doesn’t stop her brain from fantasizing about how his large hands would feel pinning her down and taking her. She could stand in a room full of people and one look from him made heat flame in her veins. She didn’t understand it, she didn’t want to feel the things she did. But she couldn’t stop it.

*

“Where is she?!” Aaron’s voice was raised, his anger palpable as Emily sat across from the slime of a human they were currently trying to get a confession out of.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” The unsub, a frail man, skittish in his behavior whimpered and Emily could feel distain as she looked at him.

It’s the slam of Aaron’s hand against the metal table that makes the unsub jump and Emily clench her legs together under the table that gets them their confession.

As the unsub is being led out in handcuffs Emily remains seated at the table, trying to control her body’s reaction as Aaron starts to pack up the pictures and papers to be sorted into boxes later.

“Are you alright?” He asks and her eyes snap to his, wide and dark and she swallows.

“I’m good.” She nodded and stands too. Her hands tremble as she starts to help him pack up, hoping that he doesn’t notice the way her pulse beats wildly, or the flush on her cheeks. But he’s Aaron and he notices everything. His hand is searing as he wraps it around her wrist and Emily has to force herself not to let out a soft moan as she wonders what it would feel like if he grabbed her throat like that.

“Prentiss?” His voice is smooth as he looked at her with something she’d only call concern and something else.

“I’m alright, I think I’m just a little tired today.” She mumbles and pulls her arm out of his grasp. “I’m good, Hotch.”

If he didn’t believe her, he didn’t say anything.

*

It’s been a few months since they interrogated that unsub, had been months since his hand had wrapped around her wrist but she could still feel it, like the palm of his hand had branded her. She’s having more trouble now, because he’s divorced and it’s one obstacle that kept her away from him that’s gone.

They’re in California working a case and it’s hot to the point of unbearable outside. It has caused even Aaron to remove his jacket and rolled up the sleeves of his shirt and Emily has to keep herself from staring at the muscle of his arms, from reaching out to drag a nail over the dark hair covering them. When his fingers flex and the muscle jumps with the movement she has to look away, cause all she can think about is how that muscle would tense if he was hovering above her.

“I think the unsub focuses on prostitutes because that’s what available to him.” Spencer’s voice forces her to focus. She feels ashamed for fantasizing about Aaron when women were literally being stabbed in the streets.

“We could force him out of the shadows, try and taunt him? He’s clearly a narcissist.” Derek adds and Aaron who’s remained standing as the rest of them are gathered around a table nods.

“Let’s do it. We can do a press conference.” He decides and looks at Emily, their eyes meeting. “You should do it, a woman would provoke him. Force his hand.”

“Of course.” She nods and she sees JJ doing the same in her peripheral, already getting ready to set up for the press conference.

“Did you bring a dress?” Derek asks and Emily turns to him. She knew why he asked, knew that if she was dressed bordering on inappropriately on camera that the unsub would feel like he didn’t have a choice except to reach out to them.

“I’ll run out and buy one.”

So that’s how she finds herself wearing a black dress that’s just bordering on too much cleavage, the fabric just a little too tight, her jacket over her shoulders that she removes just before she gets up on the podium. It goes by in a blur, she answers questions, goes through the main points that they knew would trigger the unsub, makes eye contact with the camera and gives a flirty smile. She plays her role well and when they’re done Aaron is ushering her out of the room, his hand grazing her back.

“You did well.” He tells her quietly when they stop so she can put her jacket back on, feeling too exposed. When she looks up at him, he’s looking at her with something dark, something different and she offers him a smile.

“Not the first time I’ve done that, won’t be the last.” She shrugs and they walk again, heading to the conference room they’ve spent the majority of the week in.

“You were great!” Derek grins and she rolls her eyes. “If he saw it he’ll call in anytime now.”

Like clockwork, the phone goes off and Aaron nods for her to answer it.

“Supervisory special agent Emily Prentiss speaking.”

During the duration of the phone call she can feel Aaron behind her, eyes zeroed in on her. When the call ends she turns to him and she’s sure she can see the flicker of want in his eyes. But it is probably her own imagination. It had to be.

*

After California she starts to struggle even more. She couldn’t get that look on his face out of her mind, dreamt about it at night, hoped to see it during the day.

She still goes out, still takes great pleasure in finding a partner for the night to take them over the edge over and over again until all that they can do is plead her name. Emily loved control, that hadn’t changed. And then she comes to work and one of the first things that happen one morning is Spencer, arguing with Aaron about something she doesn’t really catch. She walks into the conference room with JJ just as Aaron raises his voice just slightly.

“Reid, that is enough!”

“But I-”

“Reid.”

It’s one word and Emily feels the dull ache of arousal instantly. The tone of voice firm and she almost stumbles back. She’s not sure what happens after that, excuses herself quickly and heads to the bathroom where she stays leaning over a sink and watches her own reflection.

He’s your boss. He’s off limits. You’re not supposed to feel like this. The team would never forgive you.

She tries to think of every reason why she needs to stay away from him. Rinses cold water on a paper towel to press against her heated skin. When she emerges back into the bullpen Aaron is watching her curiously, a small smirk playing on his lips.

*

“Emily?”

His voice is quiet as he stands behind her. He doesn’t touch her but she can feel the heat of his body behind her.

They’re out, a team dinner ending up in a busy bar. She was standing outside, had needed some air, had needed to get away from the group, needed to clear her head. Aaron had just told off a man at the bar as he tried to flirt with JJ and his posture alone intimidating enough for the man to scurry off, and she knew that she needed a moment alone. She hadn’t realized that he had followed her, still didn’t turn around at the sound of her name.

“Yes?” She stares straight ahead and his heavy hand falls to her shoulder, making her inhale sharply as he turns her to face him. He’s looking at her with those damn eyes, dark and alluring and she swallows. “What?” She finally asks after he’s remained quiet.

“What did I do this time?” The amused tone caused her eyebrows to knit together.

“What do you mean?” She thinks she should back away, should move enough for his hand to fall to his side. But she doesn’t.

“You don’t think that I’ve noticed?” His head falls slightly to the side as he smiles at her, a confident leer that makes her cheeks flush. He takes a small step closer to her.

“Noticed what?” She stays put, tries to exude the same confidence that he does but her body betrays her, so does her mind and she feels herself cowering slightly.

“You’re not dumb, don’t pretend to be.” His voice is firm as his hand moves from her shoulder to gently grasp her chin. When he angles her face up to look at him she lets out a shaky breath. “What did I do to make you run away and hide this time?”

She stares up at him, the tension thick between them as she tries to think of all the reasons why she should walk away. She racks her brain but it’s empty, empty on anything besides how much she wants him. How much she needs him.

“You scared off that drunk with two words and a look. I liked that.” She finally admits, almost two years of yearning coming down to this.

He hums, tone dripping of satisfaction as he moves even closer, turns her until her back is pressed against the cold concrete wall and he presses his body against hers.

“You like when I’m assertive, don’t you?”

“Yes.” She breathes quietly and something flashes across his face, something she wants to see again.

“And what are we going to do about that?”

She should have realized that he knew, that he’s probably known exactly what she’s been thinking and feeling from the start. The amusement on his face almost taunting, his smirk teasing.

“I don’t know.” She whispers and she feels her breath mixing with his as he leans down, lips so close to hers. “I’ve never felt like this before.”

“And what do you feel, Emily?” His hands move to her waist and hers lands to his upper arms, lost in him.

“Like you’d take me apart and make me lose the control I’ve always craved. And that I’d enjoy it.”

“Hmm…” His grin turns dark, his body presses harder against hers. “That’s right. You’ve done a good job hiding it. And I’ve done a damn good job to pretend that I don’t want the exact same thing.” His thigh pushes between hers and she gasps. “But I think I’m done pretending. Are you?”

“Yes.”

*

She ends up in his car as he drives them to his apartment. It’s quiet, so quiet as the tension between them gets thicker, her heart beating wildly in her chest.

“I’ve wondered what you taste like since you first showed up in my office.” He says out of nowhere, eyes on the road and his face close to indifferent. But she catches the way he’s holding the steering wheel a little tighter, the slight clenching of his jaw.

“Who says you will get to know that now?” She challenges and he turns to look at her as they stop at a red light. His hand is heavy, fingers gripping when he grasps her thigh.

“Because we both know that the moment I have you in my bed that you’re giving yourself completely to me.” He gives her a knowing stare then let’s go of her thigh only to grab the back of her neck. He doesn’t squeeze, just holds it there and she licks her suddenly dry lips. “Because we both know how good you want to be for me, Emily.”

She’s pretty sure her underwear is already ruined and he hadn’t even kissed her yet.

He doesn’t let go of her until she nods mutely, smiles when she draws a shaky breath as he starts to drive again.

The rest of the drive goes by in a haze and when Emily walks in ahead of him into his apartment she can barely focus on anything else but him behind her. The lock clicks into place and then he’s pressed against her, slowly pushing her hair to the side.

“I’m going to ruin you.” He whispers and she shivers. “Tell me, when you’ve had your little fantasies at work, what do you think about?” His lips are heated as he kisses gently along her neck, down her shoulder.

“I-I fuck,” She couldn’t think straight, her fingers flexing with the need to touch him, but his hand stayed firm on her hips, keeping her planted. “I thought about you in every way I shouldn’t.” She finally says and he snickers against her skin.

“That’s not really an answer.” He turns her suddenly, the only reason why she doesn’t fall is his hands holding on to her the moment they’re face to face. “But I’ll let it go, for now.”

“Hotch-”

“No, I’m Aaron, in here I’m Aaron.” He interrupts her and she smiles.

“Aaron,” She corrects herself and lets one hand move to gently cradle his neck. “kiss me.”

It’s softer than she imagined it to be, his lips careful as he tastes her for the first time. His touch turns gentle for a moment, warm fingers stroking under her top as his tongue licks over her bottom lip, until she opens her mouth to him. She’s barely aware that he’s moving her through the apartment until her back ends up pressed against a wall and they break apart, breath slightly labored as they look at each other.

He raises an eyebrow, a wordless question that she nods into and it’s like flipping a switch. He kisses her again, this time harder, hands gripping at her as he moves her towards his bedroom. Her clothes land in piles across the floor, her own hands tearing at his. Then he pushes her down onto the bed, grinning when something resembling a yelp leaves her.

“You’re so pretty.” His voice is darker than she’s ever heard it, his eyes close to wild as he looks at her like she’s pray and he’s starving. The bed dips as he climbs after her, rips her underwear off her hips leaving her completely naked.

“You ruined them.” She mutters between kisses and he pushes her back enough to undo the last few buttons on his shirt.

“Sweetheart, they were already ruined.” He throws his shirt away and hovers above her. “Do you really think I can’t smell how ready you are for me already?”

The flush on her skin only increases and she looks away in embarrassment but he’s quick to guide her face towards his again.

“Don’t look away, don’t you think I love knowing how much you like it, how much you want me.” His forehead falls against hers for a moment. “You’re going to come until you can’t remember your own name.” She knows it’s a promise.

He swallows down her whimper with another kiss, then moves down her body. She knows her skin will be littered by bruises and hickeys, his mouth hot and wet on her skin until he’s between her legs and licking through her. She falls back against the bed with a strangled moan and he quickly wraps his legs around her thighs, keeping her still.

The groan that rumbles in his chest vibrates against her as he dips his tongue inside of her, pushes it as deep as possible and she gasps. Her hand grips his hair and he pulls back from her with a raised eyebrow.

“None of that.” He takes her wrist in his hand and pins it to the bed. “Unless you need to be tied up.” His eyes glint and she releases a breathless chuckle.

“Maybe next time.” At the mentioning of this happening again he grins widely and nods.

“Good girl.” He lays back down and sucks her clit before she truly has chance to process the way her body responds to his words. It’s the first time she’s been called a good girl, and she feels her body throb with the need to hear it again.

Aaron makes her fall apart in no time at all, has her screaming her pleasure into her own hand to keep the neighbors from hearing and he doesn’t stop. His eyes flicker up to watch as her body trembles, keeps his arms tightly around her thighs as he licks over her clit with the flat of his tongue.

“Oh my God…” She gasps as he continues to eat her out like a man starving. Her hands grip his headboard to keep from gripping at him. He makes a sound against her, whispers filth against her clit until she’s straining and moaning.

She comes for the second time with his name on her lips, breathless and low as her hips buckles against his face. His tongue is sure as he laps through her, lips wrapped around her clit until she’s oversensitive and tries to get away from the stimulation.

“Do not fucking move.” He warns, and she cries out as she stops squirming. “I’m not done.” He licks through her one final time before moving up her body. When he’s hovering above her she sees his face wet from her and that same wild look in his eye. He pins her hands above her head and then pushes two fingers inside of her quickly, thrusting them inside as his palm press against her clit.

“Fuck, Aaron-”

“I said, I’m not done. So that means that you’re not done.” He cuts her off, the firm tone making her shiver. “You love it, you’re clenching my fingers just from the sound of my voice.” He leers and she clenches around his fingers making him snicker as she proves his point.

She doesn’t get to respond, even if she could have thought of some snide remark, his lips were on hers, forcing the taste of herself onto her tongue as he continued to curl his fingers and grind the palm of his hand against her clit. Emily had never been the type to be able have multiple orgasms, but it somehow doesn’t surprise her that he drags a third orgasm out of her in only minutes. She bites down on his shoulder as her body trembles under his, his low words of encouragements the only thing she could hear through the ringing in her ears.

He watches her the entire time, want reflected in his eyes as he waits a moment for her to relax before moving his fingers again. Her arms jerk but his grip only tightens.

“Again.” He grunts and she whines through harsh breaths, the pleasure making her mind hazy. His fingers press against her spot, massages it with precise movements as he kisses along her jaw and neck, swallows down her moans until she’s grinding into his hand again.

“That’s it.” He whispers as her pussy clamps down on his fingers. She comes with a desperate moan, hands fisting above her head as her back arches and her eyes shut tightly. He continues until her muscles start to relax and she slumps, body sweaty and chest heaving when she comes down and Aaron carefully withdraws his fingers. He kneels between her spread legs, eyes on hers as he licks her of his fingers with a low groan.

“You look even prettier than I imagined when you come.” He mutters as he works on getting his pants and boxers off. He catches the way her eyes zeroes in on his cock. His fist wraps around it, pumps it slowly and Emily licks her bottom lip. “You want it?”

“Please.” She gasps, the word out without her even realizing. His eyes flash as she unknowingly begs for him and he fists his shaft harder.

“Maybe next time.” He growls, mimicking her earlier words as he crawls over her body again. Her legs wrap around his hips and he doesn’t waste any more time before pushing inside of her with a smooth thrust.

“You’re huge.” She knows her nails are breaking the skin of his arms as she grips him. He keeps still, gives her a moment to adjust as he grunts his own pleasure into her neck.

“I know, you’re taking me so well.” He pulls back slowly and she moans lowly. “My good girl.” He nips at her neck, licks over her fluttering pulse and she whimpers.

“Please, please fuck me.” She mumbles and he responds to the breathless plea immediately. He starts to fuck her the way she’s been dreaming of, pushes against her hard enough for her body to jolt, fucks her like no one has ever done before and Emily can’t believe how much she loves it.

It’s hard and rough and she knows that his fingers are leaving bruises on the outside of her thigh as he grabs her leg, can hear his pleasure being muttered against her skin as his forehead leans on her shoulder.

“Come for me again.” He grunts when she starts to tighten around him, his tone smug as he looks down at her blissed out face.

She comes so hard she’s afraid she’ll pass out, her body tensing and the corners of her eyes blackening out. But Aaron is right there, guiding her through it, slowing his movements and whispering her name until her eyelids flutter open to look at him with hazy eyes.

“There’s my girl.” He smiles softly. “Do you need a break?”

“No, fuck no.” She presses a kiss to his lips. “I’m good, I’m so so good.” She chuckles and he grins then turns her body around and pulls her onto her hands and knees.

When he pushes inside of her it’s almost with enough force to push her forward, but he’s quick to grip her hair in his fist, pulling her back and making her back arch.

“Beg for me again.” He growls and she mewls.

“Please fuck me, please don’t stop.”

And he doesn’t, he makes her fall apart two more times, every muscle in her body aching as she falls flat on the bed and he’s quick to follow her. He bites down on the back of her shoulder, his hips stuttering as he gets close to his own release.

“Where?” He grunts and Emily whines loudly.

“Inside.” She hears his growl, feels his hips snapping against hers and then he’s coming.

“Fuck, Emily.” It’s barely a grunt, the sound of her name breathless as he gives in to his own pleasure, hips jerking against hers. He gives himself a few seconds to catch his breath and then rolls off her, body covered in sweat as he waits for the feeling to return in his extremities. He looks at her, sees the flush on her cheeks and how she’s still quivering slightly. “Are you okay?”

“I might not be able to use my legs for a few hours.” She quips and he laughs and then pulls her into him. He presses a kiss to her forehead and then her lips.

“So,” He starts and brushes some hair behind her ear. “was it what you imagined?”

“To be honest, you were kind of soft.” She laughs when he pinches her side warningly.

“Brat.” He mutters and she hums happily. “Just you wait, sweet girl. There’s a paddle with your name on it in the closet if you aren’t careful.”

She laughs again but the goosebumps on her arms are hard to ignore and she knows he sees them and only gives her a knowing look, but doesn’t say anything. The room goes quiet for a moment and the next time she speaks it’s a little more careful, her eyes flitting over his face as she bites on her bottom lip.

“Are we doing this? Really?”

“Emily I’ve wanted this for so long. I wouldn’t be here if I wasn’t sure about this, us.” He smiles softly and she feels something warm in her chest.

“I wouldn’t either.”

[ghostykapi]

it's easy to fall (harder to leave)

pt. 2 of what if I (never) told you I had fallen // angst + happy ending bc once more I can't handle pain

hello, I lived from suffering from 2 weeks of cramming. enjoyyyy

"thank you for much for coming into this interview!" you couldn't help but feel the ball of anxiety slowly build up as the interviewer happily closes out the segment of the show.

feeling vulnerable underneath all the gazes of the cameras and the live audience wasn't a new feeling to you. after all you are the writer and producer of the group, the brains that help create the identity of your art. you had to learn how to battle the pressure, criticism and hardship your group had to go through everytime you had a comeback with the title track coming from (mostly) you

now that was out in the open, all you had to do was figure out if she understood what you said in that interview, if she ever bothered to watch it anyway.

the promotion period came and went, draining you both physically, mentally and emotionally. you had never felt more thankful for a break that lasted longer than usual.

on the first day of the said break, your group decided to have a brunch out before going your seperate ways. some decided that it would be best spent with their families, and some decided that they're going to spend it in their dorms, recharging their energies and hanging out more with other idol friends.

you also decided to do the second one, with the intention of finding more thrift shops across the city to get some clothes for the fall. so when the brunch rolled around, you had a notebook with you at the table to show to your group how you made your most recent song.

"you know" your maknae mumbled as she flips the pages on her left hand and eating her food on the right hand "I knew you liked her this much but not far enough to make a song that brought us 5 wins"

"no pain, no gain" you joked while playing with the ends of your sweater, a habit you do when you get nervous "but honestly I didn't expect that too. the liking her that deep kind of thing"

"whatever it's worth" your leader gives you a reassuring pat on the back "it's good that you're painfully aware of your feelings and doing your best to try to move on"

yeah. trying to move on is a hard ongoing experience for you. especially when you see son chaeyoung spam your phone that you'd deliberately leave in your dorm to avoid confrontation

yeah, definitely a hard experience on you

"thanks you guys" you give them a smile before they end up swishing you into a group hug with shouts (of love) in between

after the brunch, you found yourself waking along side the han river. taking in the scenery of the happy people around you with the change of a more chilly season.

finding your usual spot, you sit down, opened your notebook and started to scribble random drawings your mind thought of.

a pair of lips, a bouquet of flowers, a small tiger, two promise rings, a bunch of random strawberries-

fuck.

fuck fuck fuck.

you really need to figure out new things to draw and not anything associated to chaeyoung anymore

closing it shut, you decide it's the best idea to finally head back home and get some rest. you stand up and start walking back home. you barely take more than 10 steps when you feel your phone vibrate in your bag, indicating that there's a caller

not bothering to check the name of said caller, you answer your phone while continuing your walk

"hello, y/n speaking"

"stop walking and turn around"

you feel your heart stop as you quickly turned around, seeing chaeyoung standing right there with a phone against her ear.

by the heavens she still looks gorgeous as the day you lost her

"you should really stop avoiding me" she complains as she drops the call

"I wasn't avoiding, I was just busy with the comeback" you can't be in her presence right now, not when your heart is still hurting "and speaking of comeback, I just finished my promotion period, so I'm heading back home to get some rest"

you tried walking away from her to save your already broken heart, but she grabs your arm and tugs you back to her. the grip not leaving any negotiations to let you go

"y/f/n I swear to god" even though she's tiny, you swear that son chaeyoung angry is a scary thing "you will not avoid me again"

you avoid her gaze and only stared at the ground, feeling the sobs climbing out of your throat "you know why I do"

"no I don't"

"yes you do"

"no" you can hear the hurt and desperation in her voice "I don't"

you still refuse to look at her as the tears blur your vision

"yes." you feel the grip finally loosening up but the emotional pain leaving you to stay put to the ground "yes you do, it's true. it's all true"

you don't hear the laughter of the people anymore. you can't hear the swaying of the trees and the crunch of the leaves anymore. you only hear the sound of your heart taking in more cracks as you finally admit it to her

"y/n" chaeyoung brings you into a hug as you softly cry into her shoulder "y/n/n"

"I'm sorry" you gasp out as you feel each wall finally come crashing down "I didn't mean for it to happen. I didn't want to scare you away-I was so scared-"

"it's ok" she cuts you off, rubbing circles on your back to calm you down "you don't have to be sorry"

"I should be" you shake your head, remembering that he's still in her life "it's not fair for you and for him"

she feels her heart break at that, even if you had the chances to hate him and tell her to break up with him, you still choose to support it despite loving her

"you don't have to be with me unnie" you pull away to properly look at her despite the tears still going, to show that you're serious "it's ok. I'll be ok"

"no" she softly calls out and tries to stop your from leaving, but you were determined to go "no no no please don't go"

"unnie" you plead with her, gently prying her hands away from you depite the panic settling in her eyes "I'll be fine, just give me some time and I'll be back being your best friend"

this has to be it right? the good decision that brings your heart and her's at ease sooner or later

"for what it's worth" you smile with all the love that lets you "thank you for teaching me what is love, my muse"

that breaks her.

"don't go" she's more stubborn now, her eyes panicking as she tries to bring you in "please don't go away again"

"how will I move on if you won't let me go?" you gently push her away but she clings unto you with all the strength that she can have

"don't move on, just, please stay. don't go. don't leave. please don't. I can't handle you gone again" she cries out "I just got you back, please don't go"

"unnie" you try to reason with her but it's hard. not when you also tears come out of her eyes and you're quick to wipe them away

"don't go" she whispers, as if she's scared to scare you away "come back home to me please"

you can't say no to that, not when she still has your heart in that palm of the hand just like that.

"what about him?" you can't help but feel the guilt eat you up inside but chaeyoung is quick to shut it down

"broke up with him the moment I heard your interview" she explains "I couldn't be in a relationship with him when I know my heart couldn't move on from you. he understands too and I couldn't let you slip away from me"

"what do you mean" you feel your brain run through a million thoughts, the most prominent one being "couldn't move on?"

she doesn't say anything, only bringing you back to her dorm, to her room to show you the amounts of notebooks she ran through that was just full of drawings, pictures and words that were all of you.

you sit on her bed as you trace her drawings of you, each one accurate with your features. you can't help but feel tears come back

"don't cry" she kisses your tears away, bringing her hands to cradle your face "it hurts to see you cry"

"I can't help it" you look into her eyes and feel the overwhelming sense of relief and love "it's hard to believe something you're brain thought was impossible"

"it's not" chaeyoung reassures you, just as you always did for her "it's not hard to fall in love with you and it's not easy to move on from you too"

she kisses you that day, as you both mend your hearts over sharing stories of how you both fell in love with each other. each crack won't be healed that day but as the weeks, months rolled by and as you both go back to each other, you can feel it getting better

"my muse" you whisper one night as she sleeps in your arms, the moon giving her the softest glow "I'm home"

[httpiastri]

JACK!!! i have returned! and i missed you! 💘💘

SO HERE WE GO!! THE FIGHT… i actually don’t think pepe will fight with both boys at the same time but definitely with either one of them?! i think it’s either boy’s constant teasing and remarks towards pepe’s newfound feelings friendship with yn!! they make it their own personal mission to point out everything pepe would do with and for yn, like pepe having a study date plan with yn? - “how was the study date with yn?” pepe sharing blankets with yn during one of their friend group’s movie nights? - “keep yn warm will you, pepe?” pepe coming back home from the hangout plan everyone was conveniently busy and can’t go anymore? - “did you have fun with yn today?” it started out innocent, coming from a place of love, just the best friends trying to help pepe figure out his own feelings for yn 🥹🤏🏻 they think they’re doing him a favor by giving that little nudge pepe needs but with how scared pepe is to just admit that he does, he kinda snapped at them one day?! he’s definitely like, “can you fucking stop that? it’s annoying, i don’t like her like that.” both boys are just … 🧍‍♀️🧍‍♀️ “???what’s your problem dude??? what’s so bad if you do?” and pepe goes “but i don’t??? and try minding your own business next time?” and they’re just like “oh my god, are you scared?? is this what it is??” and pepe stomped back to him room, slammed the door shut and avoid talking to both boys for a few days or so :(

and imagine pepe ignoring/pulling back from yn after the fight!!! yn thinking that their friendship is finally progressing, just to show up to class the day after pepe’s fight with the boys and see her usual seat besides him being occupied by someone else, or seeing him sitting in a completely different row??? she’s like oh… okay… that’s fine too i guess..… 🫠 and i can see her just texting him throughout the day, undoubtedly worried bc of how he’s acting and he would dryly respond to them, before completely leaves her on delivered!! her final straw was raising her hands up to wave up pepe when she saw him across the campus, but he quickly duck his head down, shoving his airpods in while avoiding eye contact and making his way back to the boys’ shared apartment 😵‍💫

oh she def texted chris, sebas, and the gfs !! “guys is pepe okay? did i do something wrong? or say anything i shouldn’t have? he’s been ignoring me and i feel like im gonna cry.” chris and sebas, the first hand witnesses to the fight is def not shocked pepe is walking around with a sour expression on his face but is a bit taken a back to hear that’s he’s been ignoring her. so they’re just like “nah he’s not mad at you! we got into a bit of a fight, give him some time okay?” and their gfs came over for a girls night 🥺 the girls def threatened their bfs the day after, being like “idk what’s wrong with your friend but you tell him to get his shit together. all yn did last night was talk about how she hopes he’s doing well and that you guys made up.” and i think, whichever boy that was in the fight with him or both of them actually, definitely try to put in a good word or two for him to yn! just asking her to be a little patient with him while he’s trying his best, and to give him a little bit of time bc he’ll eventually come around… oh how i love these 3 so much!!! 🫶🏻 nothing like your best friends putting a good word for you to the girl you like while you actively ignore her

- 🎀

my dear dear bow anon 🥺 gosh i loved this SO much. trying not to freak out over how perfect this is-

okay yes i also think that both sebas and chris would probably tease him like crazy together, and like you say it's probably mostly with good intent. they wanna see their friend happy and maybe if they push him a little to realize his own feelings…. 🤭

but the fight itself was probs just with one of them. i'm imagining the two of them talking about pepe and his feelings for yn just the two of them, a little like "how can he not realize? he's head over heels for her??". so they're both on the same page yk. but then i think that maybe sebas takes it too far one day, saying something about the way that pepe and yn went on a long walk last night just to "talk", or the way that he held her hands in his earlier today to heat them because they were cold… and pepe just can't take it anymore. it's not weird at all that he eventually just snaps, he's under enough pressure just from himself because he can't tell what he wants, and now the guys who are supposed to be his best friends are pressuring him too?? pretty hard to handle all that at the same time

(also… pepe being the most upset when sebas brings up the idea of him being scared 😭 like he really struck a nerve with that one…. pepe tries to be so tough and strong but on the inside, he's a little softie 🥹)

i'm thinking like when yn goes through all that the day after, ofc she first texts the girls and they have no idea. but they text their respective bfs, who happen to be sitting next to each other in class, and chris looks at sebas like "? what's going on?" while sebas just wants to hide under a rock because he knows it's his fault.…. so he says "i think i screwed up" and explains. chris wants to bonk him on his head but refrains, and instead send a message to yn telling her that pepe and sebas got into a fight so that's probably what's affecting him. and while it does calm her a little, she still can't shake away the feeling that she's part of the reason why he's acting like this. so there are definitely some tears during the girls' night 🥺 and ofc she like pours her heart out in front of the girls and it just fuels their anger towards their bfs because they feel so sorry for her. sebas would probably come to yn all ashamed and apologize and 😭😭

[elegyofthemoon]

some work stuff thats been on loop in my head all week

so i think most of this week minus today, i've sorta accepted that i'm just riding a dying dream. that's mostly why everything feels very unreal these days just bc i wanted to distance myself from it i think. that at the end of this, i'll just fail again and then i'll fail out and that'll be it for me and i'll somehow magically pick up the pieces and sort my life out in some different way with the numerous backup plans i have saved for myself

but i'm still on top of stuff. i'm doing what i'm supposed to, even if it's kinda painful to do thinking that all this effort will amount to nothing in the end.

i get asked to review a new patient who came in the night prior to present to the other doctors, and i go and do that. i get to know the patient and try to figure out whats going on. i go and do my physical exam and all that, and at the end, when im trying to wrap things up, she stops me just to say "you're such a sweet and kind doctor. the other ones are so abrupt and dont listen to me"

i had to just kinda smile bittersweetly at that bc thats really all i want to be. i just want to take care of my patients and make sure they get the best help they can. i want to, but im no good medical student.

i thanked her again and left to go present the patient accordingly. the whole moment still sits with me a lot though and i just sorta play it on loop.

by character, i'm very much a caretaker. i love taking care of people and its always at the risk of overdoing myself - something i'm working on. if i could i'd do anything to keep up with this dream so that i can better help everyone. but i still find myself at a loss. i'm by no means smart. i just want to help however way i can, and if that means being in this position to do so, then i'm happy for it.

it just makes me sad because i'll meet the worst medical students - my peers - and i question and wonder and worry about the people who would fall into their care. i'm not saying i deserve their position. i understand i'm not smart enough to be where i am. heck, im even surprised i even got where i am tbh albeit i am also failing severely now lmao but it's just... it makes me sad that the smart people i meet are always so awful

at the very least, that moment with the patient was nice even if its bittersweet. it at least means that i was already where i kinda wanted to be as a person. i want to be there. and i want to take care of others because i care.

[runicmagitek]

For the WIP game, "Oh No It Turned Into A Thing" because I have to know what broke containment! 🤣

sajdfkhsaklfhaskd I figured someone would ask about this one 🤣 so back in 2020, I watched FMAB for the first time ever. I thoroughly enjoyed it and my brain was buzzing with ideas for Alphonse/Winry. Of course I latched onto the rarest of rarepairs lolsob. It was originally meant to be a post-canon PWP fic, but then it gained plot. Like, so much plot. As in... while I was rereading this WIP, it's literally All Plot No Smut. All 9k words of it jskafdkdjfklasj

I know I stopped working on it for a number of reasons. Mostly bc it was 20-fucking-20 and I was not in a good place mentally. Writing was so difficult for me back then and seeing how rare the pairing was, plus the fact it involved messy breakups of canon ships, I just didn't want to deal with any potential backlash. I don't know if I'll revisit it in the future, but I'm happy this kept my head above water for a week or so. Enjoy a snippet!

“It does, doesn’t it?” Weak laughter left her. “I guess I don’t want to deal with people right now, if that makes sense. Thinking about someone else beyond myself… it’s a lot. I’d rather just have only myself to be held responsible for things in my life.” His attention drifted to the wall over her work station. The photos missing glared like gaping holes. It brought a frown to his face, yet he refused to ask. “I hope this doesn’t make it sound like I’m ungrateful for you showing up,” she said, now bracing forearms against her knees while she looked to the floor ahead. “Had I known you were visiting—” “I-I’m sorry if I came unannounced.” He lifted empty palms in defeat. “I thought it would be a pleasant surprise, but I guess you are busy and I didn’t mean to stress you out.” She tilted her head to him. The sunlight reflected off her blue eyes, highlighting colors he didn’t know existed in her irises. “You don’t stress me out, Al,” she said, the word calm, yet the tremble on her tongue evident. “You… you sure?” She nodded. “Yeah. Besides, you’d have to try pretty hard to top the stress currently going on.”

[a-small-batch-of-dragons]

Please, do you have any tips for getting the motivation to write? Not like, getting inspiration or figuring out how to write. I have so many ideas I have for both personal ideas and fanfics, but when I sit down to write, I get about one paragraph in, many two, then I just lose the motivation to keep on typing and figuring out how to structure my words. It's so frustrating and makes me wanna cry. Do you have anything you do to help you just sit down and write/type? It would be really appreciated! I don't want to be just called "lazy" anymore.

First off i'm so sorry that it took me so long to answer life kinda came up and grabbed me, also i can and will fight everyone who is calling you lazy because that's not okay, make them turn on their locations i just wanna talk

everything else under the cut bc this got long

Second! I think for me the biggest thing to just get me started is a first draft doesn't have to be perfect, it just has to exist. I just gotta spill words onto a page and then I can go back and like actually no i want this to read like this and this to read like this. Also why I'm an advocate for drafting in comic sans 'cause ain't nothing gonna look polished and finished in that font which means you can fuck up as much as you want just to get it down.

Third, and I don't know if this will work for everyone, I don't always write in prose the entire time--that is, sentences, punctuation, all that. One thing that I'm a big fan of doing is bullet fics where I'll just bullet point what I want to happy and not pay attention to tone consistency or any of that. Then I can break down parts that are being really loud in my head and do them with proper everything like how I'd write them out for a fic or a chapter but I can keep the momentum going of 'and then this shit happens 'cause they're both idiots' and just get everything out. I've had a lot of projects where they're about 20% actual written prose and 80% 'so this and then this and then this is what they're thinking' in bullet form. You can always go back and edit it later, just get it down and out of your head. I find sometimes re-reading the bullets can bring the daydream/story idea back to the forefront of my brain and then it's easier to keep writing as opposed to leaving it all up there where it's liable to disappear completely.

Kind of jumping off from that, there's a phrase someone told me once about not letting your pen rest on the page because you'll just get a big well of ink. Keep it moving and you'll figure it out. If i'm struggling to figure out how to phrase something or write something, I'll write the clunkiest version of it [or just put what happens in square brackets like this] and move on to come back to later. i find if i fixate too hard on the hump of what's giving me trouble in that moment i'll lose the rest of the story.

Then there are a few things that are more, like, personal ambiance things? I'll find a song or a soundscape to listen to that makes my brain vibrate at the right frequency to immerse myself in the tone of whatever I want to write and listen to it on repeat even if i'm not actively writing. For some longer pieces i'll take pacing breaks where i literally just get up and walk around listening to whatever it is while i make my brain spin about it without the pressure of putting it to words. If a few specific quotes or passages pop into my brain i might take the time to scribble them down but it's mostly about making sure i'm immersed enough in the world i'm trying to write so i don't have to concentrate so hard on making sure the technical parts of my writing matches with what's in my head.

I suppose something I will ask (and honestly maybe should have asked earlier) is what parts of writing make it feel 'complete' to you and where do you find it the hardest to pick up once you've left it for a bit? If it's the pressure to get everything down just so you can point to it and say 'see here's what's happening, here are the arcs, here's where the story goes,' then the bullet technique might be more helpful. If it's the art of figuring out how you want to phrase things and how you want your words to go, I'd suggest trying the square brackets technique so you can focus on the parts that feel really strong or that you really want to sink your teeth into without interrupting the flow of the words. It's totally okay to write things out of order (i still have to convince my brain of this sometimes too) and removing some of the pressure to make everything perfect (or even prose) first time around when you just need to write can be super helpful

I hope this was helpful and kind of what you wanted!!!!! If there are any other questions you have--or if you want more of these sorts of suggestions if they weren't very helpful--please lemme know

[muzzleroars]

my take on Akechi in Strikers is admittedly, partially because it rubs me wrong for him to not at least tell Akiren he's alive at the end of Royal if he could,

so I'm partial to him being stuck in the metaverse after the engine room and EMMA finding him while rummaging through the mass unconscious for old mementos blueprints and what not lol

anyway I just like the thought of her being like '????' and deciding hell with it, another monarch for another jail with a keyword she seeds into online forums/sites about him

and then Sumire and/or Maruki find out about him and have to help him get out since the Phantom Thieves are obviously busy

(Maruki admittedly is mostly there because 1) Maruki probably feels guilty he couldn't help Akechi before 2) if they can have conversations through the trauma doors I just picture Akechi giving Maruki SO much grief while they're trying to figure out how to get it down lol)

OOH i like this!! first, i also agree that it would be...not great for goro to just decide to leave akira in the dark. i can see how that might happen for so many reasons, but if he could i think he would at least let him know he was still alive, even if he didn't give him any contact information or say anything further. but trapped in the metaverse is super interesting to me and obviously gives him the best excuse possible lol

additionally, i really like the inclusion of maruki here bc tbh....TBH....he really didn't do enough at the end of the story to make up for how much he truly messed with these kids. i don't believe maruki is at all a bad person; in fact, i think he's overly kind and a bleeding heart, but his grief twisted him immensely to the point that he did real harm to a group of kids that have already been through hell. i think he rationalized it by believing they would forget it all and achieve real happiness in his utopia...but as that utopia never came to pass, the damage he did was never undone and i would really like to see how he reckons with that since he actually hates to see suffering. and so just. the idea that goro's jail could showcase both of their characters, have growth for maruki and truly take a deeper dive into what goro's been through, sounds really interesting imo

[skrunksthatwunk]

ok so idk if this is a hot take or whatever but i rewatched the rgg movie from 2007 and that shit ROCKS i like it so much more now bc like,, the first time i watched it i was expecting a straightforward adaptation of the first game's plot and that's just fully not what it is at all nor what it was trying to be

like yeah most of the nishiki final boss stuff at the end is pretty underwhelming but it's not about him. it's about kamurocho!! it's about the reasons people turn to crime and the humanity of everyone involved except for jingu lmao and how fucking bonkers mad you feel when it's a little too hot outside and?? sadomasochism??? between the masochist info guy and majima using the same door slamming technique on kiryu that he used for said info guy and then the very very sexual connotations to the majima chestsitting knife dick shot in the bedroom at the soapland I'm just saying there are. implications. like additional ones to the inherent ones of the kazumaji dynamic like yeah!! that's all good. and once you stop waiting on game events to happen you can just like,, enjoy the stuff happening in it. it's a very character-centric movie and that scratches an itch for me.

it's also like wayy funnier than i remembered lol. some of it's not really on purpose like the cg helicopter just skating all over town shattering windows for idk reasons I guess. probably because jingu's an asshole? idk you could probably read meaning into jingu's symbol of power carelessly wrecking kamurocho but i think it's probably just for shits. but like,, the baseball stuff (the scene where majima calls their match a doubleheader and then the subtitles explain what that is for like three lines over like 30 seconds of gunshot footage is fucking top notch) and kiryu's flip phone troubles and the hostage takers requesting nice expensive food and the hostages thanking them and then the cop being like "if they'd asked for anything more expensive we would have taken them out" and all that idk I'm so endeared to it rn

i also find it kinda fascinating that majima is so present in this because like,, to my understanding, before the release of 0 (and therefore before kiwami's majima everywhere system and whatnot), majima was considered this kinda random side character, like he'd just show up whenever and fuck off again like that. he played a much smaller role. he's not even especially important in the og yakuza, and this came out around 9 months before y2 so it's just based on y1 majima's vibe. yet they gave him significantly more attention than nishiki or kazama or even yumi (though all three were sorta background figures it's like they were already ghosts. man kazama doesn't even DIE in this, he just leaves. they make up for him living by making nishiki's hair a casualty bc oh my LORD what was that jdhshsh). truly goes to show what a silly guy does to a mf

(also they actually give majima and haruka an interaction here??? and he's kind to her and kiryu trusts him to not hurt her and she's like "idc I'll beat you up don't fucking TOUCH ojisan" and he's like "well damn. go on then" gah augh love. closest thing we have in rgg to my knowledge is majima kidnapping her offscreen and him [vague rgg5 spoilers] risking his and saejima's lives to save her bc she means so much to kiryu. here he just doesn't wanna hurt a kid)

obviously it's kinda weird to ditch most of the plot/key characters of the game and i don't think it's great that they tried to tie it in at the end how they did but like. eh idk I'm happy with it. it's a good time. i won't argue it's a masterpiece (mostly bc i don't like arguing over whether media is "objectively good" or whatever) but it DOES make me happy :D. so. thanks like a dragon (2007) mwah mwah xoxo

anyway point is it's about the vibes of playing yakuza, which is (for me) about getting immersed in the city and the little side plots of the people in it and whatever and then cramming the plot in last minute :)

[squidthechaotickid]

Please tell me about your Sonic OCs

I am SO happy u also asked bc I just answered Fire's ask,, I'm happy people r actually interested lmao

U can read that entire rant if u want but to sum it up: Emerald is a terrible father and Pip and Saturn were in gay love (until ofc the horrors)

ACTUALLY I'm going to use this ask an excuse to ramble abt Emerald and Saturn's relationship, since the last ask was focused on Pip and Saturn <33

So uhm. Emerald is a cat who has a criminal organization, as I mention earlier. He's on the older side, abt 50-55, and also probably has a wife and kids (/j mostly)

When Saturn was small, probably around 2, he surprise adopted them (kidnapped basically) in what was originally going to be a blackmail attempt but instead turned into training her into being one of his best agents, Agent 27 (why did he make that choice? Long story but to sum it up he hated her bio father bc of a long rivalry, and wanted him to suffer. He thought making his daughter into something he would hate would hurt worse than just taking her)

(Note - Her name was originally Violet, but they don't figure that out until after they run away. Unfortunately, her parents died during the war, so they never got to truely meet)

Emerald wasn't a great dad. He was incredibly manipulative, being kind and friendly one day, just often enough that 27 almost thought he cared, and then would switch to being a harsh and cruel boss, allowing no room for mistakes and molding them into his ideal agent. 27 didn't know better and assumed this was all normal.

Emerald didn't let 27 be a kid much. They were an agent before all else, meaning they had to avoid close relationships, friendly or otherwise, and obey orders. 27 was too scared to disobey. They were walking the line with their familial relationship with the jackal squad

During the war, it was 27 who convinced Emerald to join Eggmans side. They were mad and wanted vengeance for the dead jackal squad. Emerald took this as a sign of them finally and truly becoming "like him."

It was a few months after the war that 27 made the choice to run away. The jackal squad, Zero especially, had been trying to convince her to for years, bc they could see how unhealthy their relationship to Emerald was.

They packed their few belonging, waited until nightfall, and left under the guise of going in a mission. They changed their name to Saturn, cut their hair from a long ponytail to a short look similar to Starline's (not based on his, they never met), and eventually ran into Gadget and Finn.

Zero and Saturn were really close before everything, so Finn and Saturn clicked. Both were villains trying to redeem themselves. Gadget took Saturn in and resolved himself to having two different war criminals in his home

Saturn eventually found out they were nonbinary, and also made friends and slowly learned how to be their own person, and not just a monolith of what Emerald wanted

The three become a family, and they all lived happily ever after!

Until ofc Emerald came looking for Saturn, bc of course he would.

Saturn is a mess of trauma and anger issues, but they're working on it <33

[havethetouch]

Figured I say it here too bc yesterdayi was not exactly thinking straigth (technically i never do but that is beside the point i was not firing on all cylinders):

Imma be MIA for a few days due to some medical bs that threw me in the kinda pain that gives you primal feelings were you wanna just scream but your domestication worked too well so you kinda do not but it chokes you anyhow bc p a i n. I also might have found a deeper understanding why animals in pain inflict injury on humans who try to help them on accident. I was in the kinda pain thag makes you hit your thigh with your fist repeatedly in the hopes of diving your brains attention to this new pain and away from the other one that drives you crazy.

Lets just say I've been in pain for a long while but yesterday it reached the crecendo that made me legit insane for a few hours but now I'm somewhat okay-ish bc i have antibiotics (turns out yeah, nasty infection) and heavy duty painkillers that make me soft and tired.

There is still some shit to do and to address and i will have a smoll surgical thing probably hopefully soon but for now its antibiotics doing their thing first.

Either way the exhaustion oft the last few weeks is catching up good now I came to the realisation I have (again, bc not my first rodeo) forgotten what it's like to not be in physical pain so I'm drained as fuck and just lying around mostly. I also got myself the new pokemon game as distraction and it makes me happy especially bc i caught a Shiny Lechonk like right next to my house in the beginning of the game so hell yeah.

Bottomline is you wont see much activity from me in the next few days bc everything is a bit too hectic for me atm.

If something's up the homies can still reach me on my phone love ya guys.

Brb.