#this post has been in my drafts since feb.... | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

march-of-the-marred-gods · 1 year

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Apollo is in his room, finishing up his weightlifting. He becomes engrossed in the cleanup, meticulously putting each piece away in his closet. He doesn't realize yet that he forgot to wipe his sweaty back, or that he left his door open.

All of a sudden, he hears a "BOO!" from none other than his new friend, Henrieta, and the sense of something poking his bare backside. That thing was her finger.

Apollo panics and jumps. "NO! NO! WHAT DID I TELL YOU!? FUCK!"

Apollo pauses, and puts his hand to his face. "No, no! It's... It's not your fault. It's mine. I should've been more careful. I'm sorry! I'm so sorry!"

Henrieta shrinks back at his shouting. "Oh... You're sweaty."

Apollo's hand drops from his face, which is full of worry. "Hey, Henrieta... Are you okay?"

She'd been told that humans fall under an incubus or succubus's spell if they come into contact with the Nephilim's bodily fluids. Still, she was scared to answer the question, as she didn't know how the spell would work. Does it control your actions or your thoughts?

"Yeah, I suppose I'm alright. What do you think?"

Apollo looks relieved. "Yeah. I can't believe it, but you seem to be okay."

Henrieta is just as puzzled. "How do you know I'm okay?"

Apollo's eyes widened. "W-well, you don't have anything immediate going on. If you had been put under, your eyes would look glazed over by now. But if you mean anything else that might happen... I don't really know..." He puts his head down.

Henrieta nods. "I get what you mean. I'll get checked out by Andre and let him monitor me. Don't worry."

Henrieta begins walking down the hall to Dr. Andre's office, when she breaks out into a cold sweat and begins to tremble uncontrollably. Terrified, she screams for the doctor. Andre rushes out to meet her.

"Henrieta! What happened?"

She sinks to the floor, panting and unable to hold her own weight. "I... I touched Apollo... He was sweaty."

Andre shook his head. "You're kidding. Did I not tell you what could happen if you came into contact with his fluids?" He sighs. "Nothing for it now. At least you didn't succumb immediately. Looks like your body is trying to fight it like an illness." He puts on a little smile.

Henrieta squints her eyes. "Why the hell are you smiling?"

Andre's smile gets bigger as he picks her up from the floor. "If you survive this, may I have a sample of your blood? I could do a lot of good with it..."

"Yeah... sure. That is... if I survive this..."

Apollo peeks his head out from his room from the commotion. "Henrieta..." He takes in the sorry state of his good friend, and is overcome with grief.

Andre notices Apollo's sorrowful presence. "Hey kid, are you going to help me keep her alive, or are you just going to wallow in self pity?"

"U-um..." Apollo looks in Andre's direction, but avoids eye contact. "I need to shower before I help... But after that I will. I promise."

Andre nods. "I understand. Take your time. I've got her in the meantime." He carries her off to her room.

In the shower, Apollo's mind wanders...

"I killed her, didn't I? I don't know how I'll live with myself, killing my only real friend. I'm so scared. What if she lives to hate me? I don't know which is worse... But I like her so much... I feel selfish. I'm hoping that she lives, so I can hug her... and maybe kiss her. Oh no... I think I love her. I don't want these feelings. I'm so selfish. I don't deserve to love anyone..."

…Yet there is another presence within that speaks to him.

"You're a fucking idiot, you know that? Who cares if she dies? She's just another ant that couldn't handle our power. Nothing more, nothing less. Wouldn't it be nicer to have a new servant that bowed to your every whim, like the ones we had before?"

"You're starting this shit again? I don't want any of that! I love Henrieta because she's her own person, and don't tell me you don't think the same. She's a wonderful person, and I won't let you trample on that. When are you going to stop resisting this peaceful lifestyle? The chaos is in the past. Your reign is over. You're the one that needs to get the hint."

"Then let me out! I can't stand being a passenger while watching you be a softie to everyone! It makes me sick!"

"And that's why I won't let you out. You want to be a dick to everyone instead of help them. You need to see Silas first. Until then, shut your damn mouth."

Apollo finishes up in the shower, gets dressed, and heads over to Henrieta's room. She had passed out, and Andre put an ice pack on her forehead. Andre gives Apollo a grave expression.

"It's not looking great, kid. If she were fully human, Henrieta would be dead already. We have to call her family to come over."

Apollo became anxious at the thought of meeting her family over this, but he understood. They may have to say their goodbyes.

While Andre got in touch with the Vampire Hunters' Association to get a hold of Henrieta's family, Apollo stayed by her bedside, dabbing a cool towel on her cheeks.

Within a few hours, an old but very fit woman of medium stature arrived to the room with a tall, lanky, young yet grumpy looking bespectacled fellow. Behind them were a bubbly preteen, a middle aged man with a large frame and portly belly, and a young androgynous adult. They all look upon Henrieta with concern, then at Apollo. He averts his gaze and focuses on Henrieta.

The old woman breaks the silence. "I'm so sorry, Doc. I had to round everyone up. How is her condition now?"

Andre gets up to shake the woman's hand. "Thank you for coming in on such short notice, Roze. She's hanging in there for now."

Andre gestures to Apollo, who is trying his hardest not to look at the group. He feels a piercing gaze from someone.

"This is Apollo, he's helping me care for your daughter. He's a good friend of ours."

The grumpy guy finally speaks up. "Hey Rozie, isn't this the bastard that poisoned our daughter? Why the hell is he here?"

Roze turns to the man, directly challenging him with her eyes. "Costel! Mind your manners. I know you ain't lose them in the last forty years since you left the throne. He's doing what he can for our daughter, so keep your pie hole shut. He doesn't mean any harm."

The man with the belly sighs heavily. "Apollo, man, I'm sorry for my dad. He's better about most things, but still has a lot to learn about Nephilim. I'm Samuel, by the way. Thank you very much for being here for my first kid." He chuckles at his own little joke, and Roze and Costel both shoot him an annoyed look. He ignores them.

Apollo tries to smile but he looks uncomfortable, as Costel is already back to staring daggers at him.

Following suit, the young adult introduces themselves next. "Uh... So I'm Kari. I'm Samuel's actual kid. Me and Aunt Henri are pretty close, so thank you for letting me see her too, even though I'm just a normal human."

Without looking up, Apollo finally speaks back, almost feeling obligated to give some sort of light retort. "Humans are welcome here too. There's nothing wrong with being one, you know. You're no lesser for it."

Kari is pleasantly surprised by his answer. They smile. "Thank you. Means a lot coming from someone who looks so strong."

Apollo turns around and smiles back, but quickly turns his head back to Henrieta, because her father is looking even more furious than before. He's never been so afraid to look at someone. He feels genuine hatred and contempt oozing from Costel's presence.

As if sensing the tension in the room rising, the preteen moves to break it. She shoves her way to the front of the group to introduce herself. "And I'm Hanna! I've been here before but you guys thought it was an intruder. Sorry I tripped off the alarm that one time... In the middle of the night..."

Apollo tries to reassure her. "It's okay. I'm glad you didn't get hurt. And I wasn't getting much sleep that night anyway."

Hanna nods in understanding.

Apollo and Andre leave the room to allow the Andersons to have some alone time with Henrieta.

"Shit, her dad is something else. I though he was going to slit both our throats. I guess that's just the First Vampire for you." He takes out a lighter and cigarette.

"The... the first?" Apollo was surprised.

"Yeah, he's the first," Andre says with the cigarette in his mouth, lighting it. "and he's a big reason why Strignalians-- the majority of the Vampire population-- don't like you Nephilim. Spread a lot of hateful shit back in his day."

Apollo looks at the floor. "I see..."

Andre takes a drag. "Look, don't be discouraged just because of him. Don't let him ruin your friendship with her. It's not worth it. He's the one that needs to learn how to be better. And it's not your responsibility for him to learn, so don't go trying to prove yourself." He takes another puff of his cigarette.

"Yes, sir." Apollo looks up, still seemingly worried. Andre takes notice.

"Hey, what's really going on?"

"What if I wanted to be her... boyfriend? He really won't like that. He'll think I'm putting her under a spell again, won't he?"

Andre is stunned. He doesn't know what to tell Apollo, because it's true; romance can be a lot more complicated when one's parent or parents hates their partner. He takes a few seconds to think before giving his answer.

"I see what you mean. Still, fuck that guy. He can get over it. Roze has him on a leash, and she likes you. So I think you'll be fine. What you need to worry about is making sure Henrieta makes it out alive so you can tell her."

Apollo's eyes have a twinkle of hope. "Thanks. I hope her family might have something that might help, too."

"Oh, I'm sure they do. But Henrieta won't like it, since I hear she has an aversion to blood."

"They're giving her blood?"

"Roze told me she would try to administer some, to see if it helps."

Apollo does not hesitate to ask. "Can they use mine?"

"I don't think that's a good idea. We don't know what your mixed blood would do to her, especially in this state. Maybe when she's healthy, you can try it." Andre smirks at the thought of seeing the result of that. "I'd like to document it, too."

Apollo shakes his head disapprovingly at Andre. "That's messed up to think about right now."

Andre chuckles. "I'm so glad you think so, kiddo. Means you still have some sense."

A few nerve wracking days pass. Apollo is in the kitchen, cleaning up after dinner. Roze enters cautiously. "Do you need any help with the cleaning, dear?"

Apollo shakes his head no, a bit nervous to speak in case Roze's hostile shadow is nearby.

Roze folds her hands together. "Okay, hon'. I... wanted to let you know how sorry I am for my husband's behavior. I didn't know how bad he could still be... until he met you. I can tell you really care about Henri's wellbeing, and it's not lost on the rest of the family, either. Thank you for always lookin' out for her."

Apollo stops scrubbing the counter, and blankly looks just past Roze's head.

"The few times we've talked on the phone over these past few months... She talked about you a lot. She told me 'I can tell he's so sweet, but he needs to relax. I wanna make him smile more.' She told me how she began to love your laugh especially. She always made a point to try and make you smile, because it was like seein' the dawn break after a lonely, scary night."

Apollo now switches his attention to Roze. "She said that about... me?"

Roze grins knowingly and nods. "She sure did."

Apollo looks back down as he puts both hands on the counter. "Why are you telling me this?"

Roze slowly approaches the man nearly twice her height. "Andre told me you're worried about her hating you. Believe me when I tell you that Henri would never throw you away."

Apollo looks up at Roze.

"She's very particular about who she acts friendly with, but if you pass, you must be somethin' special. Just remember that."

"I'm not that special, Miss Roze--"

"Well, the point is that you are to my daughter. Isn't that enough?"

Apollo sighs. "I hope so."

Roze seems confused by his answer. But before she could ask what he meant, he changes the subject.

"How... How is Henri? Is she doing well with the, um, blood?"

"She's responding to it well. I hate to do this to her, but this is the only thing helpin' her condition."

"She doesn't like drinking blood?" Apollo can't help but inquiry.

Roze folds her arms. "No. She couldn't even look at it without passing out or getting sick when she was young. She's a little better about it now, but she still avoids it in her diet. Said she didn't want to risk turnin' into her father-- or more like who he used to be."

Apollo raises his eyebrows. "She's afraid of being like Costel?"

"More or less. He used to be a tyrant, after all. But I think she'll be alright. She's nothin' like that brother of hers, so I have hope."

Apollo looks confused. "Wait, what? Her older brother Samuel seemed okay..."

Roze finally takes note of her omission. "Oh, sorry hon'. I have two sons. They're twins. Samuel's a great guy. But the other one..." Roze's eyes begin to tear up. "I love Eric too. But I've seen hints of his father's capacity for true evil in him."

"I see." Apollo opens a drawer and pulls out a clean washcloth. "Here you go."

Roze accepts the cloth to wipe her tears. "Thank you, hon'."

"I don't think she could be that mean, either. Unless someone made her really mad." Apollo remarks.

Roze nods in agreement. "You're right about that. If someone rubs her the wrong way, her tongue becomes her greatest weapon, let me tell ya."

"...Heh."

"Now I really see what my baby was talking about. You do have a wonderful smile." Roze hands Apollo the washcloth back and leaves the kitchen.

Over the next few days, Apollo does his best to help take care of Henrieta, trying not to pay attention to the insults being hurled at him by Costel whenever Roze and the others leave the room. On the fourth day of this, however, something comes over 'him'.

"Hey, you goddamned demon."

Apollo quietly puts on protective cloth gloves and kneels down next to Henrieta's bed.

"I'm talking to you, horned bastard."

Apollo closes his eyes as he holds Henrieta's hand.

Costel is becoming more irritated at Apollo's nonexistent response. "I'm still not convinced you care for my daughter. I wager you only want her to get better, just so you can snatch her heart out and devour it. You Nephilim enjoy a good sport, do you not? Do you all enjoy playing nurse, or is it just your sick fetish, you damned monster?"

At that moment, Apollo's consciousness vanished, his grief and stress having overwhelmed him. A gray-black crown or halo of fire forms, floating atop the man's head, and circling his black horns. His eyes opened back up, except both eyes were fully golden-yellow with red highlights, and full of rage. The man gets up.

"About time," Costel says. "Now, why don't you be a good boy and stay away from my little girl from now on?"

The man turns around, and before Costel could respond to this movement, he's already pinned to the wall by his neck. He can hardly breathe from this individual's large hand. The air surrounding both men became oppressive enough to crush any weak spirited person.

'Apollo' makes direct eye contact with Costel, and all Costel can do is whimper in fear of his fierce gaze.

"This is not a game to him. Watch your fucking tongue, lest I throw you out into the sun to turn to ash right now. I'm being generous, because if I torched you myself, you would be begging for the light of day to put you out of your misery."

Costel does his best to nod in understanding. He doesn't know where this overwhelming pressure in the air came from, but he felt that it was choking him more than the hand against his throat. He identified this pressure as something only his god could muster, and it was the first time in almost one thousand years that he was scared of someone else.

"Heh... There's a good little boy. Play nice, now."

'Apollo' lets go of Costel, and comes to his senses. The ring of black fire is gone, and his eyes and the atmosphere have gone back to normal. He looks at Costel in confusion, then switches to worry.

"I don't... fully know what happened, but please don't say anything about what you saw... Please?"

Costel nods again, still petrified.

"I'm sorry for scaring you, Costel."

Costel shakes his head. "No, it's not your fault. I... I..."

There is an uncomfortable, long silence between the two men. Costel is unable to look up from the floor. Apollo looks straight ahead at the wall. Before Apollo begins to speak, Costel absently walks out of the room with his head still hung in shame. Apollo lets out a sigh as the door closes behind Costel.

"Damnit. You scared the shit out of him! What did you do?"

"Only what I felt was necessary. That insect was getting too comfortable."

"I had it handled."

"You did not. I felt your distress reaching a fever pitch with what few words he said."

"I'm so sick of you..." Apollo said this without realizing, covered his mouth as if he had said something taboo.

That, along with the sound of bedsheets shifting nearly made Apollo jump out of his skin. He turned around to see Henrieta looking pitifully up at him, just barely holding part of her own weight with one arm, still in bed.

"You're not sick of me, are you?"

Apollo rushes to her side, unable to hide his tears. "No, n-never!"

Henrieta smiles. "I know. I just had to tease you a little."

This was the moment Apollo had waited for. He knows he should wait a bit longer, but he wanted to tell Henrieta now before the family came stampeding in.

"Henri, I was so scared I wouldn't get to tell you that... I love you. I want to... t-to..." Apollo trails off as he becomes embarrassed.

Henrieta's beaming expression turns into one of shock, then turns soft. She reaches to gently caress his cheek.

"Oh, Apollo... I love you too."

Apollo cringes from the touch, backing away from her bedside. "A-are you sure it's not--"

"Don't worry, I haven't lost my mind. I'm certain of it."

Apollo gives a skeptical look.

"When I collapsed on the floor, I wasn't thinking about you. Well... Okay. I was, but I was more concerned about dying than anything else. I heard a sure sign of being consumed was not even worrying about death or self preservation. But I can tell you won't be happy until Doctor Andre does some tests on me. I'd be lying if I said that didn't scare me a little, but..."

"I just want to make sure that what we have is real."

Henrieta nods. "I get it. Are you good now?"

Apollo smiles. "Yeah. I'm good. Also, your family is here."

Henrieta sighs heavily. "Yeah, I know. Can you let them in? I'm sure they wanna know I'm alive, but this is gonna be exhausting..."

"Yeah, I know all about that..." Apollo's face drops.

"I heard some of the shit my father said to you. I'm so sorry."

Apollo's eyes widened. "You heard it?"

"Yeah. I need to have a talk with him--"

"Oh, no. It's fine. I promise. He doesn't bother me anymore. In fact, I'll sit in the room while he's here. You'll see." Apollo hurriedly spoke as to put the issue to rest.

Henrieta was confused, but didn't want to press any further as she was too tired to do so. "Hm... If you say so." Clearly, she was not fully convinced.

Apollo left the room to inform everyone that Henrieta had awoken, and Henrieta laid back into the bed to conserve some energy. She closes her eyes as contentment spreads across her face.

#oc #excerpt #no 136 apollo #henrieta #this has been in my drafts since fuckin feb ive been stuck on it for an ETERNITY #i dont even know how to tag this but there may be an upsetting part #with microaggressions towards a fantasy(?) race #honestly the bigotry with these peoples probably deserves its own post #and like. race relations in general...

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goldenmoon888 · 2 years

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there’s something so insidious and beautiful about being alive and i’m not quite sure how to handle it.

#this has been in my drafts since feb of last year #and it feels fitting to post now #like this shit is dare i say…. nefarious #but also there are sprinkles of goodness if you look for them

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nobrashfestivity · 9 months

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Everyone Hates Poetry 2024

Rules

Write a poem before Feb.5th and submit it to me with the submit feature or in an ask.

Poems should be less than 500 words

You can use your real name or your blog name but they can't be completely anonymous.

Poems will be published at 9pm on Wednesdays and then a link to each poem will be added to the bottom of this pinned post so people can read them all.

I can't stop anyone from reblogging their own poems and generally sharing art is a wonderful thing, but don't turn it into some kind of social media campaign. because people with a small number of followers would be at a disadvantage. This is supposed to be fun. Please do reblog this post and tag people if you think you know someone on tumblr that might be interested. Since the post will contain links to the submissions, your poem will not be lost in the shuffle.

If I receive less than 10 entries I'll cancel the contest and consider it a failed experiment.

Public voting will begin after the 5th.and account for 50% of the vote

A panel of judges will also vote but will not submit poems themselves, and their votes will make up the other 50% of the final tally.

.There will be small prizes for the winner and runner up.

This is my art blog and will remain so, as it always has been. I'm doing this because poets here don't get much chance to get their stuff read and I have a fair number of followers. It's just a little thing to do if you want. I'm not turning this into a poetry blog or a contest blog or anything else.

Poems don't need to be finished. Due to the one month time frame I would suspect these would be first drafts, but please write something new. I want to encourage people to do something now, however imperfect, rather than showing work that's already done.

Updates will follow. Thank you!

Rule clarifications

-Please dont send poems anonymously if at all possible. I am happy to include a name that doesn't identify your blog directly but it's impossible to refer to or contact people who submit poems anonymously. I can't have anonymous poems considered without at least a name for you and if you were to win a prize, you'd need a name and address to claim it. I don't so much care about the latter part, that's for you, this becomes very disorganized and hard to regulate with anonymous messages floating in.

-Please put the title of your poem above it. If it is below it, I have no way of distinguishing with certainty if it's a title or a last line.

One poem per person please.

if you do not wish to see the poetry contest entries just filter the tag "everyone hates poetry 2024"

Due to the very high volume of submissions I am blogging them more gradually as to give more attention to each one. The same tag, "everyone hates poetry 2024", that you can filter if you do not want to see these can be used to find the submissions. If you follow this tag you'll get them all.

Please note that I am now publishing these as asks, previously I had to retype to keep the formatting and there are simply too many entries

Submissions are now closed, I will be publishing submissions all week and then when all have been posted we will start the voting (stay tuned as to how and when)

#nobrashfestivity #everyone hates poetry #poetry #poetry contest #everyone hates poetry 2024

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keep-ur-head-low · 7 months

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All Hadestown West End lyric changes (as of Feb 15 2024)

Many thanks to @ghostlypawn for posting their audio of Hadestown on the West End :) Keep in mind these are from a preview performance and the production wasn't finalized until Feb 21st, so things may have been altered further since then.

Lines in bold indicate changed lyric

Road To Hell

New Hermes line: "You can tip your hats and your wallets / With your pennies and your pearls / To the hardest working chorus / In the gods' almighty world"

Original Bway line: "Brothers and sisters, boys and girls"

If It's True

New Orpheus final verse: "Brother, look around today / Is this how the world was made? / There must be another way / Is it true? Is it true what they say?"

Original Bway verse: "If it's true what they say / I'll be on my way / Tell me what to do / Is it true? Is it true what they say?"

(Note: In the Hadestown development book Working On a Song written in 2016, Anais Mitchell said she felt If It's True as written on Broadway needed to end on more of a political mic drop and commented she may change it someday. Nice to see she got the opportunity.)

Epic III

New Orpheus section: "I know how it is because he is like me / I know how it is to be left all alone / There's a hole in his arms where the world used to be / When Persephone's gone / His work never done, his war never won / Will go on forever whatever the cost / 'Cause the thing that he's building his wall around / Is already lost / Where is the treasure inside of your chest?..."

Original Bway/NYTW section: "What has become of the heart of that man?" up to "What he doesn't know is that what he's defending / Is already gone"

(Note: I think whether you like this change is entirely dependent on your feelings on Broadway's changes to Epic III. In Working On a Song, an early draft of this new verse can be found with Anais' commentary that her intent was to simplify the Epic so that it became a simple gift of empathy as opposed to the intricate poetry and lyricism of NYTW's Epic, something she couldn't quite finish in time for Broadway's opening. It seems like she and Orpheus might have finally finished their song.)

Miscellaneous

All references to Hermes as "mister" or "missus" are altered (ex: "a god with feathers on her feet... Yes it's Hermes, that's me", "excuse me Hermes" from Orpheus instead of "Mister/Missus Hermes")

(Note: May or may not be specific to Melanie La Barrie's portrayal)

#If anyone has seen West End Hadestown recently and noticed anything different pls share!#was lowkey hoping for the Persephone verse to make a comeback :(#But it's cool the show is still evolving #hadestown #hadestown uk #west end #anais mitchell

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twig-tea · 7 months

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Canadian LGBTQ+ rights; a whirlwind summary

Back in August of 2023 @wen-kexing-apologist wrote an absolutely stellar piece here, and I didn't want to co-opt it (especially because it was already written with an American gaze and I don't want to pile on/distract from the fact that we're talking about Thai BL) so I decided to make this a separate post. And then it lingered in the sad pile of my drafts. But, I'm gonna post it anyway, and take this as an excuse to talk about Canadian history of LGBTQ+ rights apropos of absolutely nothing except the most recent move of the provinces (specifically Saskatchewan) to use the notwithstanding clause to force through legislation that the courts have said goes against our charter of rights and freedoms--specifically legislation that says a teacher cannot respect a child's pronouns without permission of the parent. This is being taken to court (latest as of this writing is that in Feb 2024 the group fighting the law was granted the right to be heard by the court in spite of the notwithstanding clause being invoked, so there is still a chance of it getting revoked via the courts).

WKA talks about what the conversation was like in the US around queer rights in the 20th century; highly recommend reading the linked post first. In Canada the conversation was a little different though with very similar themes; we had the shift to a focus on "privacy" as the driver of our rights long before the HIV/AIDS epidemic, in the 1960s. So much of the push and pull of our laws around homosexuality and gender identity and expression have had to do with the public vs private.

Sodomy has been illegal in Canada since colonization (earliest known conviction: 1648) but laws against gross indecency, which included dancing, kissing, or touching between two men, didn't get codified in Canada until 1892 (and not extended to apply to women until 1953 (thanks)). While these laws essentially outlawed any physical public affection between men from the turn of the century, the fervor to root out and eliminate gayness from society didn't really reach its pitch until mid-century.

I need you all to know about the Fruit Machine, which was an ostensibly "scientific" detection device to identify and purge gay and lesbian civil servants from the military and public service in Canada. While the machine was built in the 1950s and used through the 1950s and 1960s, the practice of using psychology, polygraphs, and interrogation to force military and public servants to come out and take a voluntary discharge existed through to the 1990s.

Our former Prime Minister PE Trudeau made famous the line "there is no place for the state in the bedrooms of the nation" as part of his so-called decriminalization of homosexuality 1967; this is of course a joke because "buggery" and "gross indecency" stayed on the books for another 20 years, the only difference being they were only punishable if the people involved were under 21, there were 3 or more people present, or the participants were performing these acts outside of their home. You may notice that this meant the policing of public space was where and how homophobia continued to be perpetuated by the state via police.

Highlighting the importance of privacy as a framework for gay rights at this time, The Right to Privacy movement was the name for one of the forerunners of modern Canadian LGBTQ+ rights groups through the 1970s--though worth noting that this group in particular was criticized for its exclusion of WLW and our trans siblings (some of whom of course overlap). The infamous bathhouse raids of 1981 ("Operation Soap"), leading to at the time the largest arrest in Toronto's history, were one of the precipitating factors in the recognizable start of the modern LGBTQ+ rights movement. In 1986, five years after the raids and thanks to massive effort by LGBTQ+ organizing, sexual orientation was added to the protected list of attributes that it is illegal to discriminate against under the Canadian Human Rights Act (gender identity and expression was added in 2012), and in 1987 "anal intercourse" was made legal for those over 18 (the legal age of consent was made the same for everyone--16--in 2019), and "gross indecency" as a law was finally repealed. The fight for marriage equality was the next step after achieving real decriminalization, and was strongly based on the right to freedom from discrimination as protected by the Human Rights Act.

[Just going to take this moment to note that for some reason they never struck off the law criminalizing sodomy when more than two people are present; this is still an inequality on the books now and people do (rarely) still get charged with it.]

In the late 1980s and 1990s, the censorship fight was most famously held in the written sphere--if you've seen the movie Better than Chocolate, you might already be familiar what I'm talking about. From approximately 1986 through to 2000, Canada Border Services targeted shipments to queer bookstores, holding them up, sometimes destroying the content, putting those businesses at risk, and preventing queer content that passed through border control to be stocked in physical stores. It took the Supreme Court of Canada's ruling in 2000 to shut down that practice as an illegal suppression of a bookstore (Little Sisters in Vancouver, BC, shout-out!)'s right to freedom of expression.

Raids on safe spaces for sexual activity continued to be a driver for action through to the 21st century. The WLW bathhouse the Pleasure Palace (changed from "Pussy Palace" in the late 90s to be more inclusive of our sisters without that particular body part) was raided in the year 2000; 19 years after Operation Soap, and notably the first and last raid on a queer woman's bathhouse in Canadian history. What followed was a massive public coal-raking of police, including the very telling call to action: "out of the bars! Into the streets!" I don't think this was necessarily the intended implication at the time, but looking back the threat was that if we were not given our rights, we would be in everyone's faces (and conversely if we were given our rights, we'd be quiet). The legalization of marriage between any two consenting persons of legal age came five years later in 2005 (I don't mean to imply this effort was the only reason--the fight for marriage equality was active all the way through the 90s and early 2000s; it's just an interesting parallel that two of the biggest wins for equality for queer people in Canada came 5 years after a historic police raid).

One of the factors in gaining acceptance of LGBTQ+ people in Canada was the fight for marriage equality; as it focused the conversation on sameness rather than difference. The queer activism movement here pivoting from messaging around bathhouses and being left alone to marriage equality was an intentional, strategic attempt to be accepted as the same rather than being honoured for our differences. And that fight coming after the HIV/AIDS epidemic and bathhouse raids is no accident as it framed queer people directly in opposition to the stigma of promiscuity that surrounded assumptions about gay people which fed into the lack of support for medical intervention, research, and treatment for HIV/AIDS (here in Canada too, our history is just as gross on that front, people just don't talk about it as much. But Canada followed the US government's example, and so people were left without medical resources for at least eight years in Canada (since the first cases were identified here in 1982) and THREE YEARS after they had been approved by the US--AZT wasn't available in Canada until 1990. Three years in which people died unnecessarily. We similarly approved PrEP four years after the FDA, in 2016. Today, despite "universal health care", if you want access to PrEP, it will depend on the province you're in as to whether you can get it at all for free or whether you need to pay--in my province, it takes 2 months to get free PrEP).

Today, just over 50% of the people with HIV/AIDS in Canada are men who have sex with men; it's estimated 80% of people infected with HIV know their status, of those 75% are being treated, and of those 89% are effectively unable to transmit the virus. In that context, the ongoing fight re: HIV/AIDS in Canada today is around decriminalization, specifically decriminalization of drugs (since ~20% of HIV infections are from IV drug use--one of the many reasons I support harm reduction strategies), and the decriminalization of non-disclosure (since Canada is one of the few places where you can be charged for not sharing your HIV status with a sexual partner). Until very recently, we were also fighting to be able to give blood--it was only in 2022 that men who have sex with men were allowed to donate blood in Canada, which meant every visit to a blood donation clinic involved questions about the gender of your sexual partner(s). And, as mentioned at the top, one of the rights we are fighting to retain right now, is the right to have our gender expression respected without forced outing to a parent or guardian; Once again, the fight in Canada has become centered around the right to privacy.

Slightly tangential to the topic at hand, but I would be remiss in talking about moments in recent history when the law did not prosecute us, but it failed to protect us. In the 2010s, a serial killer was targeting men who he thought he could get away with making disappear; and he was right. The police ignored calls from the community to treat the case as a serial killer for years. Bruce McArthur killed 8 men who had gone missing from Toronto's Gay Village between 2010 and 2017, several who were vulnerable because they were distant from their families (because they were gay and closeted), homeless, and/or in immigration limbo (waiting for status), so it took longer for them to be reported missing. During this time, through to just weeks before the arrest, the Toronto Police insisted in public statements that there was no serial killer.

Black and Indigenous queer people have regularly died as a result of the police being called while they were in crisis. An unnamed trans woman (who was midgendered by the SIU after her death); Regis Korchinksy-Paquet, both in 2020. In 2022, Dani Cooper, queer activist who advocated against police-run wellness checks, was shot and killed by police during a wellness check called for them.

As a positive step, in 2016, Black Lives Matter Toronto staged a protest as part of the annual Pride Parade, making a list of demands, but the one that got the most coverage was the demand to ban police at Pride. This was taken up by the Pride Toronto committee, and since 2017 police have been banned from having an official float or presence at the parade. This has been taken up by several Canadian cities including Vancouver and Hamilton and inspired action in other cities globally.

With that context, in which queer people are rightfully distrustful of police, it is alarming that police-reported hate crimes against LGBTQ+ people (one of the only ways we have of tracking hate crime consistently) had a record-breaking increase in 2023.

In 2017, Prime Minister Justin Trudeau (the son of PM Trudeau quoted above) gave a public apology to LGBTQ+ Canadians. Here's just a brief excerpt:

"To the kids who are listening at home and who fear rejection because of their sexual orientation or their gender identity and expression; And to those who are nervous and scared, but also excited at what their future might hold; We are all worthy of love, and deserving of respect. And whether you discover your truth at 6 or 16 or 60, who you are is valid. To members of the LGBTQ2 communities, young and old, here in Canada and around the world: You are loved. And we support you."

The important part about this apology was twofold; one, it explicitly named many of the specific instances of oppression I mentioned above, and two, it listed the things the government was doing to make reparations. This included the repeal of the law that equalized the age of consent (which went through two years later, as mentioned above), the pardoning of people who had a criminal record due to unjust laws based on LGBTQ+ discrimination, settlement of a class action lawsuit for victims of The Purge, and a commitment to work towards better resources for mental health and housing for LGBTQ+ people, as well as a committment to continue working to remove the barriers for gay men to donate blood (which went through in 2022). One of the other important achievements was the change to allow an "X" option under gender on Canadian Passports (so the three available options are M/F/X) in 2019 [some provincial gender opt-out options have existed since 2017].

The current government is by no stretch perfect, but it has been good to see some of these moments of our history acknowledged and corrected for. As the global pressure towards fascism continues, it's critical that we remember these changes are the result of hard work, not inevitable "progress", that these fights are ongoing and require our energy, and that change, using a variety of tactics, is possible.

Quick hit facts if you prefer a list to a narrative:

In Canada, it was illegal for men to hold hands with men or women to hold hands with women in public until the 1960s;

The government tried to expunge us from public service in the 60s and 70s;

it was illegal for men to have threesomes until the 1990s;

bathhouse raids were made possible due to legislative inequalities through the 2000s;

Canada took three years longer than the US to approve treatments for HIV/AIDS, four years longer to approve PrEP, and still today access can be complicated/expensive;

it was possible to be of legal age to have sex but not anal sex until 2019;

Gay men were barred from donating blood until 2022;

Canada remains one of the few countries in the world where you can be prosecuted for not disclosing your HIV status (though does not apply if you retain a minimal viral load);

In 2023 some provincial governments tried to make kids choose between gender expression and their privacy (and potentially safety) from their parents; as of March 2024 that fight is still actively being fought.

The take-aways I hope people get from this post:

This history is more recent than we pretend, and is ongoing

Framing gay rights as right to privacy vs right to being not prosecuted for being in public is nuanced and intertwined

Transphobes need to fuck off

Some references/further reading/watching:

Brief history of LGBTQ+ laws in Canada at the Canadian Encyclopedia

The Fruit Machine documentary made by TVO

Article on HIV/AIDS in Canada policy written by one of the policymakers

Timeline of HIV/AIDS Developments (only goes to 2010 so does not include PreP, which was approved in Canada in 2016, four years after its availability in the US)

Article on The Pleasure Palace raid by one of the organizers

Article on the Bathhouse Raids 40 years after Operation Soap

Article on Bruce McArthur's crimes and the review of how police handled the case by former judge Gloria Epstein

Regis Korchinksy-Paquet and the unnamed trans woman dead after interactions with police

Dani Cooper's death

Article about the Supreme Court case brought by Little Sisters bookshop

HIV Non-Disclosure Law Fact Sheet

Article about the end of the blood ban for men who have sex with men

Black Lives Matter Toronto on their 2016 action at Toronto Pride

Prime Minister Justin Trudeau's apology

Gender "X" Options on Passports

Stream Better Than Chocolate (you may need to look up where it's available in your region)

Little Sisters Book & Art Emporium

Glad Day Bookshop (Makes a claim for being the oldest queer bookshop in the world; one of the few queer public spaces being maintained/actively protected as more and more of our spaces are eroded, and also just a personal fave so I'm taking the excuse to shout it out too)

#canadian history #lgbtq history #typed so that i can stop thinking it #for reference #long post

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batshieroglyphics · 5 months

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I guess it's that time of year, again, when I ask folks to send me prompts(text is link to my ask box) for the 800-2k word ficlets I send out with holiday cards. (For those new to this, ficlets will get publicly posted to AO3 in Feb/March of 2025. And I usually post the rough drafts to Patreon, if you really can't wait.)

Things to keep in mind about prompting:

I do not anticipate to write every prompt I get, and multiple people sending in the same or a very similar prompt will not make it more likely to get written. (This does not mean you shouldn't send in a prompt.)

I don't write in any of my existing AUs, because I don't want folks to have to be familiar with a longer fic or series to enjoy a little ficlet with their card.

I am not currently writing Harry Potter for personal reasons. Any prompts sent for this fandom will be deleted out of hand. (This does include crossovers.)

I will 100% write a ficlet for my own OCs. I am not comfortable writing a ficlet with another person's OCs unless their creator requests it themself, and are open to me pestering them for more information.

I will write both shippy and platonic ficlets. However, these do aim to be family-friendly, since I don't know who's opening anyone's mail, so we aim for a generalised Teen rating.

If you've never seen me write a ship, but you know I'm in the fandom, go ahead and prompt it. (If it's a ship that I have no intention to write, I'll just quietly delete it, not here to insult anyone's joys.)

Yes, anon is on. Please don't give me a reason to change that.

You can also send your prompts to either of my multi-fandom blogs (batsutousai and the back-up bats-batsutousai) or my twitter (LadyMarvolo). You can also send them through my cohost (batsutousai) or bluesky (batsutousai), but I keep forgetting to check both of those places and don't know what sorts of notifications are turned on, whoops.

BATS' SHIP LIST (text is the link. This is not all-inclusive, just the ones I am 100% comfortable with and down with writing. Yes, I know I said, last year, that I was going to try to put together a platonic 'ships' list. That clearly has not happened. I shall make an attempt again this year, but my promises are sand.)

PROMPTS (just gonna do links to some of the prompt lists I've reblogged previously, just please let me know which list you're pulling from?)

Bats' previously created holiday ficlets prompts list

Line of dialogue

Four word prompts

Numbered dialogue prompts

X Me prompts

I think there's one in my drafts that cuddling related? I'll see if I can't find that and post it some time this week.

And, no, you do not have to pick prompts off the lists. If you've got one you've been dying to send me, go for it. Just, please keep in mind that I'm only looking for short ficlet prompts at this time.

#bats' holiday card ficlets #prompt request #about the Bats

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deepwithintheabyss · 7 months

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This idea has been in my drafts since 2023 Feb 5 and it's a little gory xD I think it's time to post this

just thinking about Jason railing Tim while playing with a knife and cutting into him and Tim bucking suddenly up, causing a deep gash in his side

Jason ignoring this and continuing to fuck into Tim violently and then after he's spent twisting Tim around and pressing into the wound and hissing out

"What did I tell you about hurting yourself without my command?"

While ignoring that Tim is still hard

#the abyss speaks #jaytim #knifeplay

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velvet-helvetica · 5 months

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Hello world! I’ve dusted off this blog for some updates, including a new fic that I sorta accidentally published (what?!! it’s not that exciting, really. Read on if you must):

* First, a preface: Wow, that Fallout show is pretty neat! I’ve only watched the first episode but it gave me all the feels seeing the dystopia we know and love come to life. Pretty sure the rest of the fandom has already binged all 8 episodes. I’ll have to dodge the spoilers because it’s going to take me longer to get through the series with my busy schedule (although I’m determined to finish it before my Prime free trial ends).

* Perhaps because of the show, or the inevitability of people discovering how awesome the Fallout video games are, new readers have stumbled upon Good Blue Hunting. To my embarrassment, the fic has been sitting there “In Progress” since Feb. 2021. So I decided to finally do some AO3 clean-up and mark the darn thing as Completed. Hooray!

* In the process of getting GBH to completed status, I unexpectedly had to publish a new fic. Reason being that I had 3 chapters for an Epilogue sitting in draft form in GBH. I didn’t want to lose those chapters (even though they’re kind of meh and not fully completed), so I copied them over into a new fic called Tomorrow’s Headlines.

To be honest, I wasn’t ready to publish them, but after learning about AO3’s policy of deleting draft fics after a month, I didn’t want to lose them. So… yeah. There it is. I should be more enthusiastic, but I haven’t looked at those chapters in a while and am honestly scared of how dusty and unfinished they are.

Still I feel like I owe it to anyone who cares about F/F Nora/Piper Fallout fanfics to publish them, warts and all. It ties up some loose ends that truly bothered me in the main story. So far there are 2 chapters posted, with a 3rd one waiting in the wings. I have a 4th chapter on my computer…and then the material abruptly ends. Endings are hard!

* To summarize, yes I have a new fic, Tomorrow’s Headlines, epilogue to Good Blue Hunting. But don’t hold your breath for Tomorrow’s Headlines to be fully completed (but I never say never). Oh, and I made both as part of a series, which trumps up their self-importance. And no I haven’t finished the Fallout TV series yet, no spoilers please.

* Related news, I’ve already received one comment from a kind reader stating their belief that Tomorrow’s Headlines was written by ChatGPT (bwahahahahahaha!!!). I make no promises that this fic will get any better. In fact, letting ChatGPT have a go at it might improve it immensely 🤣.

#fallout 4 #fallout #fanfic #fanfiction #piper wright

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mulling-over-milgram · 9 months

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My current Hotaru theories and thoughts

ahh- this has been sitting in my drafts so long sorry…I just really could not make sense of the recordings and was really struggling with them (sorry I’m stupid ^^;) but now some people have done theories on the recordings I feel like I can post this with out needing to go into the recordings.

if I am wrong @74n5n I apologise eternally!

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First I’d like to attempt to establish a timeline. Using two pieces of evidence. “It's cold, and snow has barely touched the ground.” This implies that the murder took place in winter so since I think sumi-gram takes place in japan? That would place the murder somewhere between December and February. Then the second piece of evidence.

The blurry text “I’ve lost the desire to try any more during the last year of school” now according to google school in japan starts around April ends around of the next year March. Hotaru's profile puts them at age 20-25 and since university in japan starts at 18 and goes through 22 we can probably assume they are 22 since they mention it being their last year of school. We see what I believe are cherry blossoms? Which bloom around late March early April again according to google which means this could either be from the start if the school year April or the end of the school year.

murder = dec - feb

memory = april - march (very start or very end of the school year)

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Now this might sound a little weird but I strongly believe that Hotaru killed themself after their murder. Migram is referred to as another life for hotaru. “Another life that you'll give me.”

Then theres a couple other lines that could suggest it as a possibility:

-Ahh, that's not fair. Isn't it? But, I've grown pretty tired already. Going to rest. (If this line follows the conventions of milgram then it should be directly after the murder)

-“This year. No more years.”

-“They touch the empty air with their hand. It's impossible to reach you.”

moving on too what actually inspired this theory , the fact that Hotaru is pretty consistently associated with death. There is the fact they changed their name “I changed my name in papers, but everyone keeps on calling me by the old one.” Which could be considered a death of identity. They reference hell “Well, maybe you'll go to Hell and pay for it.” (Personally I believe this to be hotaru speaking but I could very well be wrong) and the names remi suggests are heavily tied to death. For rei she points it out herself

“I know a perfect one! Rei! As in, "rei" that means "ghost",

Rei is also a murder victim in milgram which could further hint at them being dead.

(she also mentions rei meaning zero which idk if this is a common thing but I’ve heard negative numbers be called dead numbers?. Zero in this context a number between the living and dead?)

The second name she suggests tama. In Japanese tama is a suffix that can also be used to refer to souls or spirits. She also mentions the name sounds like a cats name and cats have heavy associations with evading death or having multiple lives.

“Like... Tama... No, that sounds like I'm giving you a cat name.”

then their current name means firefly. Fireflies are symbolic of departed souls and there is a superstition that fireflies coming into the house means someone will die soon. Then there’s

“It's enough of a crime that I'm here , Right into Hell, I'll take you with me.” Here possible referring to the murder location but also seems to possibly reference milgram? So it’s enough of a crime they are there at the murder location? To go to hell (milgram?) either way they intend to go to hell with this other person hell is ofc where you go after death. After the crime they will go to hell > after the crime they will die?

suicide and suicidal thoughts is in the trigger warnings which doesn’t mean it applies to hotaru but it does mean it is possible.

their murder location dose seem to be a tall building so them dying or killing themself directly after the murder is logically possible.

so when hotaru comes to the prison they are named and are suggested names that mean souls of the dead hence I believe they are dead and were revived by milgram.

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Moving on to more name stuff. There were to common threads in the name meanings I’m not sure what to do with gems and storms.

Fireflies are also called lightning bugs and one of the other means of tama is thunder. According to google storms are symbolic of change but then again most things are symbolic of change if you look hard enough…

Another meaning is tama is jewel and the name rei has connections with jade.

Then rei and hotaru are both unisex name but tama has strong associations with the male gender (fun fact tama is literally the word for boy in my countries native language) maybe I’m reading to much into this but since hotaru’s story seems like it might have some themes about gender identity I thought I should mention it.

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hotaru could also have symbolism as the beginning of the end? Their birthday is the beginning of the last month of the year , they are the first prisoner and as such will be the first to receive judgment in the final trial. The start of a new life coming from the end old one? Or like if this follows novel-gram rules hotaru could die if they are voted guilty at the end so its the start of a new life that will end? They are in their last year of university so they are at the end of schooling but at the start of working life? Idk I kinda just had this thought while looking at the character profiles its not a super serious theory.

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we’ll we are on the topic of thoughts I had while writing this “Another presence is to your side. Not in the form of a real human, nor a foggy silhouette. What does it feel like? Want them to go? Want them to stay?” Now this is most likely a person but “not in the form of a real human” got me thinking what if its hotaru’s identity? Or past identity? I don’t fully believe this myself but I thought I’d chuck out the possibility of this not being a person but more of a concept…if that makes sense?

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their seems to be alot of duality with hotaru’s character theirs ofc the hair but also to of the symbols that they have been associated with cherry blossom and fireflies also have duel and opposite meanings in Javanese culture. Fireflies are love and war and cherry blossoms are life and death / beauty and violence. (Which yay more death symbolism to add to the pile :D)

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finally I’d like to talk about what I think the murder was “It's cold, and snow has barely touched the ground. Are you afraid of heights? Is your head spinning? When you glance down, there is an unmoving body; although you can't even see it.” Okay so we know from hotaru’s prisoner card their murder location was a tall building or bridge.

so they won’t be able to see it very well because water in the case if the bridge or the height if the building. Them knowing the body is there without seeing it implies they were the one for lack of better of better phasing put it there. (Tho I wouldn’t throw out the possibility of their murder being induced suicide…? I didn’t mention it earlier because I don’t have any hard evidence ‘its enough of a crime I’m here” / “you say not everyone here is a murder is a murder i’m pretty sure I must be” as counterintuitive as that sounds makes me feel like its somewhat possible that it wasn’t direct murder but again possible I don’t currently believe that to be what actually happened)

“Another presence is to your side. Not in the form of a real human, nor a foggy silhouette. What does it feel like? Want them to go? Want them to stay?” Now I’m not fully sure on who this is.. ^^; I think the other person from the recording is either the victim or the person here.

They touch the empty air with their hand. It's impossible to reach you. If my suicide directly after the murder theory is true then this would be when it happens.

so in conclusion who ever they mention in the “In fact, I’ll kill you with my bare hands next time.“ is probably who they killed and I believe they most likely pushed them off the roof of the building and then someone else came up onto the roof but hotaru died before that person could stop them. After they died they were taken to milgram. I think that the person they killed is either one of those girls mentioned in the recordings or the person they were talking to in said recordings.

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My voting thoughts

I’m going to vote victim as it dose seem they were possibly the victim of mis-gendering/neglect and definitely deadnaming/bullying or harassment it doesn’t seem so far like they saved anyone so far and I don’t think I understand enough to firmly vote Perpetrator from what I understand currently it doesn’t feel right to vote them that.

#If I had a dollar for every milgram related analysis were I mentioned cats have nine lives I would have 4 dollars #Which isn’t alot but its weird it’s happened 4 times

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secretsliedevelopment · 8 months

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Feb 2024 ||

art reveal ?!??! :0 BUT HELLO AGAIN !! I bring more to the table <3 This time it's concepts ! I've been very.. careful on showing off a ton of stuff due to i still want mostly everything to be a surprise so FOR NOW I'm just gonna show off X and their development :) SO who Is X ? A mysterious fellow if that wasn't obvious. X Doesn't like to be perceived to the public, Nor does he like the public. X has a serious case of germaphobia and can't handle being in a crowded room. Therefore they prefer to work alone rather then with his team mates. Team mates you may ask ? X works for a Locally run company (funded by a mysterious person oo ) called H.E.X , a extermination company you could say :) just to get rid of unwanted pests wink

There isn't much more I can say ( due to the fact I don't have much written BUT I want to keep what i have a secret ) SO the only other thing I will share Is a bit of development X went through !

Look under the Cut to hear more ! V V

As you can see he went through a bit of .. drastic changes. I really wanted a steampunk theme, the first one didn't quite stick though since it was the very first draft of X and I just needed some colours to stick. I had to many long haired characters so I tried something new and experimented. The time X appears in the story its gonna be very cold, so I kept that in mind and went for a more , post-apocalyptic outfit ? But this is by far my most disliked design I have done PURELY because I just hate how it looked. SO then I left it again, till I came back to try one more time. THIS time I thoroughly looked through Pinterest examining steampunk themes, I also took inspiration from The most recent COD game and decided to change his character more while I was at it ! So now he wielded a sniper. My lovely gf Mentioned to me that since he was a germaphobe they should have their hair pulled back, .. I kept the ponytail picking out tho since I wanted the green to stick out . Tldr ; First design was alright, But I could do better. second design I hated but the colours were perfect. Third design is absolutely perfect till I need to update them when the story officially comes out !

#Devilyblog #oclore #ocdevlog #ocref #occoncept

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m0e-ru · 2 years

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👀👀 also i just want to say thank you! i really got into P4 this year and finding your work only amplified my love for it. mim became like my 2nd favorite character all because of you also the stage play it really lives in my head rent free. i love your art and writings, your work has turned a special interest into an even more special one.

hi yeah I read this morning I was tearing up a bit sorrry for being an emotional baby I dont get love letters often maybe thats why im full of love . in exchange. thank yo thankyou for all the nice words it means a lot. here’s A LOT in return. with commentary because it um. was too much for the tags

okay this one was one of the drafts for my 3/20 art this year there was like. four drafts till i settled on this one then went SIKE 🏌️🏌️🏌️ you're doing the dual type ones ( the magazine ones i ended up posting )

MIDNIGHT TV STATION REAL !??? anyway here’s just shadow yukiko and iznmi interaction it’s not finished since there’s no backgrounds yet I swear there are. I did this alll the way back in feb I think and just kept polishing it bit by bit throuhgout the year and it’s STILL not done yet. the horrors came in I couldnt work on bigger pieces anymore since they wouldnt even get FINISHED anyway 💥💥💥 there’s also a s.kanji one but those are a bunch of blobs and text in shorthand mim is such a jokester asking questions n shit to twist people’s heads but yukiko’s just so sweet she really means what she says yknow like this is supposed to be the start of mim remembering what humanity is besides the mindless and selfish desires that technically gave birth to them after tearing them apart from the whole they once were. the LAST few TV stations these women were asking shit like ohhh can we hang a noose here ohhhhhhhh I want it to smell like liquor and rust and this girl was like can I have a castle !!!! can I wear a big pink frilly dress and hold a mic to push my human self’s buttons I think it could work

yeah these are my plans for the m.inaba arc for gsaslau and FUCK IM SO MAD I WAS WRITING ON THE TUMBLR EDITOR BUT IT FUCKED UP THE FORMATTING AND A WHOLE CHUNK OF TEXT IS GONE sorry this post is gonna be a lot longer than it should be okay ! gsaslau Magatsu Inaba arc. Adachi’s besties with the attendant but Mim decides they’re done with the attendant facade and erases everyone’s memories of the guy. They did a bad job at it though so Adachi’s stuck with the awareness that he has a hole in his life that could’ve been avoided if someone did a better job at cleaning up everything that reminds him of memories he’s going insane over thinking they exist when they DON’T to literally everyone else. He makes a deal with the fog to be god’s prohpet and usher in the New World as its Fool so it gives him the answer to whether or not his memories are real and worth bringing back a guy he thinks is dead. Souji tries to stop him and as much as Adachi’s trying to hide his true intentions under the guise he’s justifying himself as a bad guy this whole time, he kinda snaps under pressure that a bunch of kids are being able to stop him despite the help of a god and a world he can manipulate. Mim’s plan was to wait for his Shadow to take over so his body’s properties would be enough for him to become a vessel to manifest Ame-no-Sagiri. But THAT doesn’t happen so they did plan B: go force the power of Persona and wear it like a costume enough to hide their face to stop further awakening more memories that could throw the whole deal off. Souji recognizes that it isn’t the power of Persona so he demands god to stop using their powers through a human just to hide from something, it’s putting the guy in enough pain already. Mim agrees to leave and Adachi’s Shadow finally takes over anddd and yeah I could make a separate post about my writing I wish I had more time and energy for things

okay this one looks simple it’s likeee a manga that was supposed to be a companion piece to some writing that also didn’t get finished. so. I could share that but they’re non proofread discord messages but I promise the draft is there the context is that they’re in Okina and they try out the gacha machines. Mim’s genuinely having fun but they pull a teru teru bozu which um. remind them they’re supposed to dutiful god. like they look like a teru teru bozu. and that they’re supposed to treat this as an experiment to see humans’ true desires so they just shove it to Adachi who harmlessly relates it to them because it honestly looks stupid annd the whole tension dissipates.

here's also a bit of writing alll the way back in feb. i guess the context would be episode 13 and 14 where nanako leaves her loveline umbrella with the fox except this time she doesnt get wet since she had a pit stop at the gas station yaayy :mimyay:

The little girl left her umbrella by the torii with the fox as a gesture of her kind heart. Then she hugged the plastic bag in her arms and began to run straight home.

The rain was pouring hard! The summer wasn't as kind as her, nor would the crashing showers that would come after days of blazing heat.

Every step she took quickly became squickly and soggy as her shoes and socks were already soaked through. Her pigtails were getting heavy and her bangs almost covered her eyes. Just then, she heard a voice in the rain. But before she could look, she slipped forward.

"Ah!" Nanako gasped as she let go of the bag and braced for impact, but heard another "ah-h!" as she was quickly hoisted up with an arm wrapped around her chest, picking her up and felt another arm underneath support her. Her chin now on broad red shoulders that smelled faintly of car exhaust and gas amidst the rain.

The splashing of shoes on the wet pavement along with the crinkling sounds of a plastic bag was heard. Nanako was more worried of whose perfectly dry clothes she drenched with her sopping wet ones.

"You okay, little kiddo?" a familiar voice asked as she was gently set down on dry concrete away from the rain.

"I'm okay," she said, wiping her bangs and looking straight at the stranger in front of her.

It was Moel's gas station attendant, the one Souji works with. "Ah, you're big bro's big b--" she quickly shook her head, "I-I mean, big bro's senpai."

"Heh," the crouched man laughed weakly, it even seemed like he forced that smirk. "I work here too, y'know? Little customer."

"Oh, I'm sorry. And thank you, mister attendant."

"You're welcome, and don't worry about it. 'S not like I'm too mad about it."

An awkward air accompanied the scents of lingering exhaust from the last car and the petrichor from the rain. Although Nanako didn't feel any of this, just to say. It's always been like this with big bro’s senpai, at least how it's been with just Nanako herself. Like right now.

The man continued to crouch and adjust his hat. "Well, you're a silly girl. Why's someone with flowers all over her papers running around in the rain?"

Dunno how long, but I hope you haven't been running around like this for too long. I know you live nearby but your big bro's gonna have to take care of you if you get sick!--I mean, he'll always take care of you. He's a good kid.

If you were out long, I'm impressed how much of this you kept dry! …Just hoped you could've done the same for yourself, hehe.

Ah, but knowledge's different than wisdom, or whatever mister detective said. Hm, he even said I had neither! Maybe that's why I didn't know?

Uh…well….the fox by the shrine…. it was getting wet, so I…

Hm…

Heh, 'can see how you and that kiddo really are alike, little kiddo.

and SURPRISE !!! i found this lying around i thoughtt id add it here because youre so nice and it's so lovely to see you in my notifs all the time THIS IS A JUMPSCARE FOR EVERYONE ELSE sorrryyyy sorry

#persona 4 spoilers #mayonaka terebi suteeshon #gsa sl au #p4 #yukiko amagi #nanako dojima #izanami persona #moel gas station attendant #⛽️🌫#tohru adachi #adanami #assk #cyphere #boot.tingting #arttag #latigaux #// crazyy crazy my artstyle changed at least a billion times this year and last year #// sorry for all the manga pages and shit out of context i also put a lot since i get like one or two asks on my ask games im trying to mak #// make the most out of it because this gas station doesnt have the best marketing department <- i am the marketing department #// OKAYYYYY OKAY SOSOS MUCH COMMENTARY sorry for not shutting up i am an npc youd get so mad at #// for interacting with because youre stuck with 27 unskippable dialogue boxes if you do #// hi coming back to add more tags since im still awake it means alot to me that i could get people to like this idiot it fills my heart up #// sorry if that.s a bit cheesy. also my heartfelt and genuine apologies i made you trip and fall in this hole somewhat and i cant provide #// as much as i would like to. as a starving man i .i cant really cook much theres rootcrops in my head that um.dont get harvested sometime #// sorry for litera;lly making bullshit analogies that dont make sense i dont have a lot of people to talk to. so those rootcrops just #// grow roots deeper and deeper and deeper and deeper and i do pull it out it just takes a while and it s so .big

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