#this song gives me too much feels

[sulky-cabbage]

The sukugo fight can't get animated any sooner I'm craving sukugo tiktok edits

[anambermusicbox]

Excerpt from 2024 人物 interview, found here:

For example, [while redoing the album] Qian Lei "forced" him to write a song. Qian Lei thought, this new album was extremely significant to him, so there should be a song Zhou Shen wrote himself. What's more, others have criticized him for not being able to compose. But Qian Lei knows he can---and quite well too. "It's not possible someone with strong emotions and a sensitive heart to not be able to write a good melody, it's completely not possible." Usually, Zhou Shen will hum out a melody and record it with his phone---sound engineer Xu Wei has listened to them and thought the melody lines were really good, and could absolutely be straightened out into an original song. But Zhou Shen always felt it wasn't good enough, and even said, to compose beside such a skilled composer like Lei-ge, it would be like an elementary schooler insisting on reciting their composition in front of a doctorate holder---so imprudent. His friends all know his personality---for a "master in self-deprication," being unduly humble was a daily occurrence. His old friend of ten years, lyricist 沃特艾文儿 said: "Not just composing---when I first met him, he even thought his singing was bad. It was so upsetting to me. I'm very relieved that he at least recognizes his singing ability now." Qian Lei has also listened to Zhou Shen's compositions before, and told him, isn't this pretty good? Zhou Shen said, don't mess with me. Qian Lei said, I'm serious, I'm not joking, it's quite good. Zhou Shen said, bye bye. Qian Lei said, bye bye yourself. Thus, when working on the new album, he would use every means possible to force him to write a song. One moment he would "hold a hammer behind him and get him to hurry up and write," the next moment he would set his mind at ease, saying "you don't have to overthink it, gradually the more you write the easier it will be. I'm here, so don't worry." This song was written at Qian Lei's home---once the first step of writing was taken, the rest went smoothly. Musically, Zhou Shen already had things in mind, and a few hours later, the main melody was basically set. Zhou Shen also participated a lot in writing the lyrics. He really liked the line "I can catch the flowers floating in the wind; I don't care whether I fall into the galaxy or into the mud." But "no matter how I sang it, it felt a little off, like it was missing something." He hummed it and hummed it, and out of nowhere added a soft, low, even a little "rude", "嘿，少管我," and "suddenly it came to life." Before, Zhou Shen had always wanted to write a song called "少管我." In his earlier years, he had randomly used these words in replies to fans, and in an interview where he talked about how his fans were never satisfied no matter what he changed his profile picture to, he ended up jokingly shouting "少管我, " and it then went viral. After that, Zhou Shen thought, as a singer, if one day I could turn "少管我" into a song, how interesting would that be. These past few years, he found a lot of people to compose its melody, but he always felt the melodies weren't quite what he wanted. The album that was cancelled also had a song in it named "少管我," but he still felt it wasn't quite right. Until now, it came to him like a "gift" from above. The first impression many people get from these three words is more or less rigid, sharp, harsh, stubborn, and capricious. But to Zhou Shen, a rebellious attitude is easy but truly knowing yourself is a long journey. "It's not necessarily about rebelling against the whole world, but you have to clearly know what version of yourself you want to be, and only then can you become yourself."

The day of the interview at an art park in Tongzhou, Beijing, the sky darkened a little. Zhou Shen took out his cell phone and played the unmixed recording of "少管我." The melody was light, "like travelling, very free." He shook his head to beat, and listened to the song he had listened to countless times one more time. "When I was writing this song and its lyrics, I didn't have "少管我" in mind, but in the end it became the "少管我" that I wanted." Moments like these, sparks flying, you think, "that’s right"---that's the biggest joy in making an album.

[shadowetienne]

OnlyOneOf "give me the lOve, bitxx" Lyrical and Thematic Analysis

OK, so, I have a lot of thoughts about this one! I think that there are several ways to interpret it! So some notes before you start reading:

I am looking at this through a queer lens, if you want to do a non queer reading, good for you, that's not what I'm discussing here

Some of my interpretations are going to go multiple potential ways, and this isn't an essay I'm writing for school or actual publication, so I may leave some trailing thoughts or slightly stream of consciousness style explanations

I am fascinated by the lyrical structure of this song, so bear with the fact that I'm going to babble about that a bit before I dive into the details of lyrics/meanings.

If you've not listened to the song in full yet, here's the official version:

And here is the wonderful translation done by Imbabey on YouTube that I used for reference:

I would love to hear other people's thoughts on this song! It's fascinating to me, and I think that it's a really important part of the lyrical story of the album as a whole!

This is about to get really long, so the rest is under the cut:

SONG/LYRICAL STRUCTURE

So, I'm going to start out with talking about the construction of this song because I think that it's really interesting! We start and end the song with the chorus, and it repeats a total of 4 times within the song. That chorus takes up about half of the entire song! It's important and we should be paying attention to it.

We also have a 2 part Prechorus that repeats twice (before the 2nd and 3rd version of the Chorus) with the very first line of it changed each time. This is interesting in part because that's more repeated lyrics taking up a lot of the song, but that also points to that changed starting lyric as being super important!

Then we have our three other Verses: Verse 1 is short (only 4 lines), Verse 2 is longer with some rap and builds up to the development, and Verse 3 acts as the Bridge into the final chorus and has a really different sound to it. Verse 3/Bridge is also quite short (only 4 lines). So little of the total song is in these storytelling verses, but a lot happens!

THEMATIC CONNECTIONS

I will talk about more of these later, after I dig into the lyrics more specifically, but I want to reference a few songs that I will bring up in thinking about this one.

First off is actually one of their covers, KB and Junji's cover of "Heather":

While this song is a very different angle, like "give me the lOve, bitxx" I feel like it deals with the issues with dealing with being queer in a society that does not want you to be, and how that can build resentment. OnlyOneOf is very thoughtful in how they pick their covers, especially the ones that they make fancy videos for, so I think that they are a lens that we can think about their own discography from. This was actually one of the things that I thought of right away when I got the full lyrics for "give me the lOve, bitxx" so it's worth having it in mind when reading the rest of my analysis.

Another older song of theirs with an MV that I want us to look back at for the context of this song is "angel":

I am considering this song specifically as a lens of how heteronormativity creates a narrative of how people need to react/act in society, and how that can lead to overcompensation, and also sometimes some pretty obsessive patterns (doing relationships right, having the right appearance of interest even if there is not actual interest). Obviously, "angel" is a song with many different interpretations, and I've considered writing something longer form about it, but again, remember that right now, this is a reading through the queer lens. This is a song and MV that I've got in my head as context for "give me the lOve, bitxx" so I want to make sure it's fresh for you as well.

Important note to carry with you in this echo of "angel" in the interpretation: In "angel" the narrator has idealized the idea of this girl, of the perfect straight relationship that will make him fit in society (again I know, among other things). In "give me the lOve, bitxx" he has that relationship, and it hasn't fixed things for him. He still doesn't fit, and in fact kind of seems to feel even worse.

I think that there are themes present in a lot of their songs that are echoed here, but those are the two big lenses that I wanted to bring up before we get into the thick of things.

OTHER OVERARCHING THEMATIC THOUGHTS

We're almost to talking about the lyrics, I promise. But there's a big thing that I want to discuss here that leads to two very different readings of the song.

I think that one possible reading of this song involves the narrator addressing two separate love interests: a guy who he has had his first taste of queer attraction and love with recently and the girl who he has been dating in an attempt to feel "correct" in society.

I will be addressing this potential second person I think getting talked to in a few places in the song, but also try to reference what I think the interpretation would be if these parts are addressed to the girl or not.

THE CHORUS

Don't make me pull the trigger [girl*] Once you know more you'll get hurt Don't come near Maybe I could be dangerous Give me your treasure [what] What's there to laugh at? Oh I can't hear anything right now, freeze

*I have added the two adlibbed words that I caught from what the translation above has transcribed in brackets. However, the first adlib "girl" only appears in Choruses 1-3 and is omitted in the final Chorus.

These lyrics are aggressive, and kind of nasty towards the girl. They are reminiscent of a hold up, an attack, but also a threat to end a relationship ("pulling the trigger" on something to end it). Whatever the case, there is some threat involved in these lyrics. The narrator views himself, or on some level wants to be viewed, as "dangerous." He also seems to want the end to the current relationship, at the same time, he wants to just ignore everything and have things stay where they are and "freeze."

He doesn't think he's good for the girl, he doesn't really think that he's good for himself here. There's a certain amount of hopelessness in this chorus. He's got this whole persona, this "bad boy" image too, and that definitely makes me think of overcompensation. A lot of times, queer people will make the decision to lean really far into heteronormativity to protect themselves, and this bad boy vibe that the narrator has going definitely leads into that.

I think that it is really interesting that the "girl" adlib drops for the final chorus. If the male partner is also being addressed, by dropping the girl from the chorus at the end, it can also be interpreted that what is bringing up these feelings of needing to end the conventional heteronormative relationship is the new relationship with the male partner that has made the narrator realize that this current relationship is creating something dangerous for him, and he can't get the love that he wants in it (and that he actually does want love that is not socially expected/accepted).

THE PRECHORUSES

The first line of the prechorus is the only line that changes between the two. In the first prechorus it is:

It kind of bothers me.

And in the second prechorus it is:

It feels kind of weird.

I think that this change in the lyrics is leading into the feeling that the narrator is figuring out what he wants over the course of the song. It's changed from being something annoying without really having a clear direction of that, to feeling weird or uncomfortable to what the narrator wants.

I've divided the prechorus into two parts in my mind at least. After that first line, the rest of the prechorus goes:

What the hell do you want from me baby? Foreign personality, style Somehow I'm injurious, so dangerous.

I feel like this really draws in the idea of the narrator feeling like he doesn't fit the expectations of society and how he should behave in it. He doesn't know what his partner wants from him, he feels "foreign" and "injurious" in his roles and interactions.

This version of him talking about being "dangerous" also feels much more confused, like he's been told that the way he is would make him "dangerous." That word "Somehow" carries a lot of weight in this. He feels conflicted about it.

We follow this into the second half of the prechorus, which is unchanged between the two:

When you hug me tight from behind I feel broken, I can't explain it Love Don't come near, no way

This set of lines actually really interests me because I feel like it could be absolutely addressed to both or either of the girlfriend and the male partner.

One of those big queer experiences that a lot of us have been through is feeling broken and wanting to hide from it. In the narrator's heteronormative relationship that should make him fit, he's not enjoying these experiences and doesn't want them, and that makes him "feel broken."

But at the same time, if addressed to the male partner, when he experiences these sorts of things, he does enjoy them, and that potentially scares him just as much. He doesn't want to let the male partner near because that experience feeling right makes him "feel broken" by society that has said that it's not an OK way for him to feel.

So either here, he's telling the girl he's been dating as overcompensation to get away from him and leave him alone because he's not feeling it, or he's telling the guy that he's into and struggling against the feeling to stay away because the very possibility of that makes him feel weird and scared and he doesn't know what to do with it.

VERSE 1

This is the verse that gave me the idea of the song being addressed to two different people! It's actually the set of lyrics that initially made me think, oh huh, this sounds like it might be addressed to the guy that he's been thinking of. Especially in the narrative succession to "dOpamine" where he's got some obsession going on. I think that it can be read as addressed to either though.

I think of your face all day long I look strange to myself I can't think about anything else Why do you keep getting stuck in my head?

If this is addressed to the male love interest, it makes a lot of sense that the narrator is sitting there going: I have this "perfect" in the eyes of society relationship, one that I should be so happy with, but all I can think about is this guy that I'm into. Why can't I leave it alone?

On the other hand, if this is addressed to the girlfriend, it can also read as trying to force himself into the right way of thinking about his relationship. And because of it looking "strange" (weird, uncomfortable, not right) to himself. He's getting "stuck" on this idea, and not getting anywhere with it. He can't get that sort of love he wants in the relationship he has, and he's uncomfortable with that.

VERSE 2 (the long verse)

Like with the prechorus, I see this as being divided into two parts. This verse is rap heavier, and it really feels like a lot of the development of the feelings and understanding of his feelings that the narrator has.

Why are you so clingy anytime I see you? I'm speaking, but you cover my mouth Yeah, because of you Again, seeing my sudden bewildered expression makes her stop her words

This is actually another section that I think can be addressed to either partner! And maybe the "her" in the final line of this part of the verse is a translation artifact that I'm reading too much into, but it does make me think, is "her" different from "you" here.

If this is addressed to the girlfriend, it reads as really just not actually wanting the relationship, as feeling silenced from his actual feelings by the demands of society represented in the girlfriend and the fact that he feels the need to have a girlfriend to compensate, and that's starting to really grate on him now that he has seen/experienced another option. It implies that the girlfriend is starting to see the cracks in their relationship and know that something is wrong, maybe she's even trying to make space for him to say something, and he's not saying it.

If this is addressed to the male love interest, it's a really different vibe. It's the questions of: Why are you risking showing this in public? Why are you stopping me from talking? Why are you both showing this so much and trying to keep me from actually talking about it? In this reading, the girlfriend is noticing whatever is going on between the narrator and the male love interest, but maybe doesn't know what to say about it or if there is anything to say.

The second part of this verse is much more focused on the internal feelings of the narrator as opposed to the interaction with others.

I hide my feelings, thinking of each other I close my eyes Well I gotta play dumb, making it pump, sick of it numb, pick up the phone Relax now (Boogie on and boogie on)

So this part of the song is definitely at least in part about sex and intimacy between partners. Who is the "each other" here? Well, I think that it can be the narrator and the girlfriend, where he's closing his eyes to hide from himself and his lack of actual interest. It could also be the male love interest where he's closing his eyes when with the girlfriend to better imagine what he actually wants and his fighting himself over.

I find the part "pick up the phone" really interesting. He's having this unfulfilling experience in the relationship that he's supposed to want, the one that is supposed to be perfect for him in the eyes of society, so he's reaching for his virtual world that lets him get away from that (and where I suspect he can contact the male love interest, or at least see things about him). He's relaxing by getting away from what is supposed to be his important intimate relationship.

VERSE 3 / BRIDGE

There is a big change in tone with this verse, and I think that this is where the narrator accepts what he is feeling, and that he doesn't actually want to be with the girl, he doesn't want what society thinks that he should want. He's still conflicted and scared, actually maybe more scared, but he's starting to realize. I think that that's part of why the "girl" adlib then proceeds to be dropped in the final chorus that comes after it.

Tasty like a raindrop, oh my I can't get used to it at all You know what? Actually I'm afraid you will leave Give me a chance to kill my doubt

I think that the first half of this verse is referring to his experience of queer intimacy with male love interest, the first time he's actually enjoyed it, and referring back to "dOpamine" that "thirst" that he's experiencing (with the "raindrop" lyric).

The second half is another one of those things where it could be addressed to either the girlfriend or the male love interest.

If it's addressed to the girlfriend, even though he's realized what he actually wants, the fact that it goes against the directives of society, and what he feels like he should want, he just wants that one more chance to see if maybe it could work with the girlfriend, that he is scared of what is past this relationship that isn't fulfilling but is at least safe.

If it's addressed to the male love interest, I get the impression that there's an element of the male love interest having basically said "look make a decision," and the narrator has been hesitating. Not feeling safe. And now he's saying, wait I'm more afraid of the idea of not having a chance with you and something that actually feels right than I am of leaving my safe by social standards relationship. Give me one last chance to taste this possibility and make myself sure before I jump into this relationship that feels dangerous but fulfilling.

FINAL THOUGHTS

Whoever the song is addressed to ("you"), the narrator has very much built up feelings of resentment towards social expectations and the girlfriend that he has put those social expectations on.

He's sort of billed himself as dangerous because of how society views what he has realized about himself. He knows he isn't being good to himself, he's not being good to the girlfriend, he's hurting everything in his path because social expectations are weighing down on him and telling him he's awful and hurting him.

A big part of the song is him kind of breaking under that, realizing that he can't keep going the way he is going, but struggling to make that final decision to leave and actually face his queerness and the possibilities that exist in it.

[s1xseasonsandamov1e]

i love when people pretend that not liking taylor swift is some crazy controversial thing like bitch you know damn well

[afterlife-2004]

Reminds me of “The World Was Wide Enough”, a song from the musical, Hamilton!

[a-s-levynn]

"I'll tear the fibre from the filament / I'll be the limit of your light again" A Series of Small Offerings - II/7 - day15

[starrysharks]

zeno's ultimate pokemiku tierlist ⁉️(it's all his opinion and he loves them all regardless⁉️)

[untimelyambition]

i am begging on my hands and knees for jon matteson and bryce charles to sing a song together. since i first watched npmd, every single day without fail i have thought about their harmonies together in hatchet town (“if he gets me next i could be three” and “fits the bill, he fits the bill”) literally the sickest harmonies in the entire show, i turn into a little gremlin every time i hear them. their voices sound SO good together it actually makes me a little ill. my favourite song my favourite line my favourite harmonies, their voices blend perfectly and i am so desperate to hear them sing a duet to hear them singing together again pls pls please pls pls pls. pls.

[radmista]

Sowing seeds of discontent and disharmony by hanging up on my parents birthday phone call the second my mom asked if I gained weight. Hope that sits badly on their minds while they think about how that's the first call I've engaged with them in 2 months and it was for the dogs birthday. Dad scrambling to text me for my mom that she didn't mean it. Like fuck I told her I've been having a rough month and day. She couldn't keep it to herself that badly. Fucks sake

[edge-oftheworld]

sorry complete mess i love you but album opener was all you needed to be

I've removed all the singles except the only one that charted which is me myself & i. songs that also charted if i remember correctly were bad omens and efyts. do with that information what you will.

this left me with room for only 2 of the extended version songs (not that they usually ever get used for singles) so i picked the two that seemed most like they COULD be potential singles. moodswings came a close third though

[koqabear]

dreamer is everything i wanted and more bye guys i’m deactivating!

[faaun]

oh my god ! haha . anyway a bit buzzed perhaps. anyway here's what happened on the date

[heartbreakfeelsogood]

.

[cycle-hit]

the kotoko playlist i listen to in order to write her 👍or as i like to call it. "how much of her borderline personality disorder/complex ptsd swag can i audibly attempt to put into a playlist"

[lyricalambrosia]

I love writing normal well adjusted men (aka another snippet of the final chapter of Can You Feel The Sun?, the first two chapters of which you can read here!)

[jessamine-rose]

/obey me! vent/