#to all of you out there with boyfriends

[shoyoist]

the way there isn't a single man i know in this entire world that hasn't made me feel so sick of him at least twice

[maxgicalgirl]

Being a “Fun Fact !” kind of autistic is all fun and games until you get halfway through sharing an interesting tidbit and realize that it probably wasn’t appropriate to share in polite company and now you have to deal with the consequences :(

[spectrecowboy]

evan, you have a little something on your face :)

please do not use my art without permission!

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Laios's three Boy Best Friends. And yes, they hate him.

[deep-space-lines]

I am inflicting, or perhaps bestowing, upon you: Garrus as various unnecessarily sexualized references that come up if you look up refs of women with guns :)

(( @milkywayes i know we’ve like almost never interacted but the silly comment i left on your post would Not leave my brain. I need to show u what you inspired ))

[ameliathornromance]

A part of you was unsure how your Orc Boyfriend would react. As you pruned the bouquet of flowers in your hands, you were starting to regret your idea. It was only a few paces from the camp now, surely you could just turn back around and throw it away, right?

Flowers were something that women received typically. Maybe he would think you were insinuating something about him, or that maybe he was weaker than you thought he was-

“Love! You’re back!”

Too late for take backs now. Hiding the bouquet behind your back, you watched as your Orc Boyfriend dropped a wood chopping axe and rushed over to you. “How was your walk? Did you get what you needed?”

You weren’t sure why you thought you could hide the flowers from him. He was at least two or three feet taller than you.

He peered over your shoulder and raised an eyebrow. “What’re those for? You’ve never brought flowers back before.”

Well, now or never, you thought. Meekly, you pulled them out from behind your back and held them out to him.

Your Orc stared at you for a minute, looking you up and down in confusion. “I… Um…” Where did you even begin with this? You must look insane.

Sighing, you lowered the bouquet and looked down at the different blooms. “When humans really like each other, sometimes they give flowers. So, I picked some flowers for you.”

There was silence for a moment and you felt your face burning. You knew it, this was a stupid idea.

“You picked these… for me?” His green hand came into view, wrapping around your interlocked fingers.

You nodded, still not looking at him.

Before you could stop him, he had snatched up the bouquet and held it high above his head. He bellowed to his others in the camp: “Look here! My lovely lady brought me flowers! What have you suckers got?!”

Orcs from their various work stations looked up, growled, snarled and swatted their hands at your Orc, “get stuffed you lug!”

Your jaw hung open at your Orc's audacity, before he looked back down at you and gave you the widest grin. “I didn’t know humans did such a thing,” he admired the flowers in his hand, seemingly as big as daisies in his huge hand. “You picked these yourself?”

“Wait, you like them?”

“Why wouldn’t I like them love?” Your Orc kissed you on the forehead. “You went out of your way to get them for me.”

“It’s just… I thought… Human men don’t normally get flowers, so I thought that…”

Your Orc let out a bark of laughter, “but I’m not human, am I love?” He pulled you into his arms and squeezed you tightly. His arms were the most reassuring and calming thing at that moment.

Hugging him back, you realised that there had been nothing to be afraid of. How could you have assumed that he would have been insulted by your gift?

“Anything from you is something to be treasured.” He mumbled to you, giving you another kiss on your lips.

Patreon

[electrozeistyking]

Tiny Disassembler Tries To Put Himself in Second Food Coma; Girlfriend Won't Let Him

(you better believe that first time was an accident)

[aroaceleovaldez]

we should make Nico more fucked up, actually. enough woobifying him. that boy should be covered in blood and viscera

[ladyhavilliard]

mo dao zu shi tarot

wheel of fortune: good luck, karma, life cycles, destiny, a turning point

the tower | jiang cheng

death | wei wuxian

[library-fae]

realising im the autism outlier by finding every conversation interesting if i can learn more from it

oh you're an expert on car mechanisms? i know nothing about that, tell me more

oh your favourite tv show just aired it's finale? share with me all of it

im always seeking knowledge and need to know the answers to every question

[strangerstilinski]

a mildly suggestive and smutty but extremely fluffy little bit of goofy eddie bc he is my boyfriend and i love him — brought to you bc my fiancée did this the other night and it immediately gave me eddie vibes

(reader with breasts & a vagina)

𝐍𝐒𝐅𝐖 +𝟏𝟖 under the cut

you’re still a little fuzzy with the lingering fog of your orgasm when eddie begins to make his way back up your body, marking his path with a series of wet kisses as he goes. when he exhales, his breath meets the sticky dampness that his face has smeared from your cunt up your belly, the rush of air feeling startlingly cool against your skin. there’s a sharp rise and fall in your chest as you come down, your chin tipped down to your chest so you can watch eddie pepper your ribcage with loud, suckling kisses.

a yelp tumbles past your lips when he nips at the underside of your breast, teeth pinching at the sensitive skin sharply. you half-heartedly push at him, shaky hands smacking at his mess of curls in reprimand, but eddie isn’t deterred. instead, he chuckles and continues pressing soft kisses all around the curve of your breast.

his affection has the hands that you were using to nudge him away only a second before curling into his hair as his lips find your right nipple. you stroke softly over his head, patting down his curls while a contented sigh slipping past your lips in response to his gentle kisses.

his pace slows, though he continues to worship you inch by inch. he moves on to your other breast, digging his nose into the fat as he breathes you in. it’s then that his hands slide past your waist and up your ribs, pushing your tits up and to the center of your chest until they’re pressing in around his face. an aggressive shake of his head draws a tired giggle from you, your thumb stroking soft over the apple of his cheek as you attempt to drag him up.

but eddie fights your hold, instead letting out a groan into the soft skin of your breasts, his words thereafter muffled against them, “I wanna live here.”

another laugh bubbles up and slips past your lips, “between my boobs?” you question, voice dripping with entirely too much adoration and fondness.

eddie hums, a sound of agreement, but quickly continues when you only laugh. “’m serious. I could stay here forever.”

as if to back up his words, he gives another shake of his head, nuzzling himself further into the suffocating plushness of your breasts.

“please.” you laugh, “you’d never last forever, you love kissing me too much. and you’ll have to stop motorboating me if you want-”

you don’t get to finish your words before eddie is abandoning your chest to crawl the rest of the way up your torso. he drops and crushes you with the weight of his body, dark curls tickling at your cheeks as he dips his head and crashes his lips against yours in a collision that’s more laughter and teeth than it is kiss.

[nicelytousled]

Steve's House From Hell

I'm bastardising @mcmansionhell's carefully honed craft to make fun of Steve's house from Stranger Things. If you like making fun of far more ridiculous houses and learning about architecture along the way give them a follow!

The Harrington's house is actually in Atlana. 8253 Carlton Road, Riverdale to be specific. With that in mind, lets get into the epic highs and lows of this property.

FRONT EXTERIOR

Built in 1976 when Steve was the tender age of ten, this grey hunk of bricks boasts 4 beds, 5 baths, 2 acres of land, and of course the heated pool. These photos are a mix of shots from the show and pics taken when the property was last sold in 2009.

FOYER

There isn't physically a chandelier in the Harrington's foyer but spiritually there is.

MAIN ROOM

I think Steve's Plaid RoomTM was a set built separatley from the house? Unless that balcony bit has been renovated since 2009.

POOL ADMIRATION ROOM

Why this room has two giant empty doorframes into the main room I don't know. Otherwise it's kinda cosy!

A KITCHEN

I have no idea where this kitchen is in relation to any of the other rooms.

REAR EXTERIOR

(as someone who has zero garages I may have gotten emotional here)

I hope you enjoyed this foray into all the photos I could find of Steve's dumb rich people house! Worth an estimated $421,700 today, it's nowhere near the fanciest or most ridiculous McMansion out there. Nonetheless I hope this inspires you to include it's more nonsense features in your fics.

[t8oo]

this happens in the columbo world and not the magic lupin world where physics dont matter and lupin probably breaks all the bones in his twiggy body to slide out the prison window bars 😢 (original by @/hausofdecline on twitter)

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for refusing to propose to my boyfriend?

We both wanna get married and our families & friends are cool and everything (honestly he's my mom's favorite child at this point), but he says I should have to do the actual proposal and I say he should.

He thinks since I hate every restaurant he takes me to (I work in food service I know what I'm about he picks BAD places) I should just be in charge of it, I think since he makes way more and he's stupid picky about jewellery (he knows what the different gemstone cuts are. He has OPINIONS on gemstone cuts. I am marrying a monster) he should have to buy the ring, and we both need it to be a special romantic surprise enough that we're not about to co-propose or some shit. We're also both guys, so there's not really any traditional rules to fall back on here, either.

It's been mostly fine, but his 30th birthday was the week before last and he's LEGIT mad I didn't propose then. We took a whole trip and had dinner with his entire family (we live a 2 1/2 hour flight away) and shit, so if I were gonna do it, that would've been the time. I told him I've already said I wasn't proposing, and that he can do it himself or we can be boyfriends for his 70th birthday too, and he said "If we're not married by the time I'm 70 you will be LUCKY to still be boyfriends" and stormed off to our room, and now he says he's fine but I'm 90% sure he's been training the cat to bite my hands? It's happened every single time I try to pet her and he looks very smug about it.

So did I fuck up here or what?

PS If I'm not the asshole how do I talk him into proposing already I am DYING over here I wanna marry him so BAD. He BRIBED the CAT to BITE me I NEED this man to be my husband N O W .

What are these acronyms?

[werepires]

Fic in which Mary tries extra hard to bond with Cas to show Dean she supports him and their relationship, except that relationship doesn’t exist in the way she thinks it does and because none of them ever use their words Dean is now faced with the horrifying thought Cas might become his stepdad

[delta-piscium]

Murray, after watching Steve and Eddie for all of five seconds, confidently walks up to them and starts his whole spiel about pining blah blah etc etc, and like, Steve will absolutely not have that, there is no way.

So he snorts, looks at Murray down his nose, and with zero hesitation lies, tells him “We’ve been dating for a month, congrats on seeing the obvious... Or not since you couldn’t tell”

He just hopes Eddie will play along. Steve is sending him the strongest signals with his mind right now, and, just, he knows Eddie can be petty like this too (that’s why he likes him so much, and yeah Murray is a little right but fuck him so much more for it)

Eddie ‘lives for the bit and to fuck with people’ Munson does not disappoint. He slings an arm around Steve and is like “Yeaaahhh wow, real clever observation there buddy.” In the driest tone imaginable

And Murray, well he was sure he was right, still kind of is sure he’s right so he just squints at them for a bit and then breaks out in a wide grin, and only sounds a little sarcastic when he says “Congrats on figuring your shit out yourselves.” 

Except he absolutely does not mean it because he wanted to do that, he likes doing that. And now he's sulking and will watch them so closely because something seems off 

Eddie and Steve, so committed to the bit and to not let Murray win, start fake dating. All while Murray tries to catch them in their lie, and they’re all too stubborn to give up

Murray starts to slowly think he maybe was wrong though because they really seem like a couple. And even though there’s still something there he can’t ignore the proof.

When they straight up make out in front of him, and he can tell that they’re so lost in each other they probably don’t know he’s there he's about to concede

But then after that, they act so weird around each other again? It’s like before but worse and how did the pining get worse when they’re actually openly together? Regularly have their tongues down each other's throats and all?

Meanwhile, Steve and Eddie are going through it because they thought they’d be okay but that kiss was so much, and oh god they don’t think they can do this? But they can’t let Murray win?

A week and a half later at their monthly 'we survived the apocalypse, again' get-together at Hoppers and Joyce’s, Murray just gets enough of how twitchy they are. He grabs them both and locks them in a closet and is like “I don’t wanna know anymore, whatever fight you had or didn’t figure it out”

They sort of stand there shuffling from foot to foot not marking eye contact until Eddie is just like “Oh for fucks sake, I like you for real okay? The bastard was right so can we actually just date? Please?” And all Steve's can do is say "Thank god," while he smiles the most blinding smile and grabs Eddie by his collar pulling him in for a kiss

Fifteen minutes later they come out of the closet (the irony and symbolism is not lost on them) all disheveled and a little too satisfied looking and are met with very loud screaming from all the younger teens, ranging from a simple “Ew!” (Mike) to “Dude we are right here what if we'd heard? Or walked in there and seen?” (Dustin)

They’re lucky they’re too distracted by this to see Murray's self-satisfied smirk because if they did they would have pretend broken up and there would have been another month of sneaking around but this time actually dating and pretending they weren’t