#to post cleavage on the internet for strangers

[glutenfree-rootbeer]

🖤🖤🖤

Bonus slow motion bouncing:

[sanders1665]

They proudly proclaim how much they love their country,

this home of the brave and land of the free,

"God Bless America", you hear everywhere,

well, I love everyone that thinks and acts like me,

except for those dark skins of varying degree.

They support female empowerment and equality,

but abortion faces so much hostility,

don't kill the fetus, lets send it off to war,

and stop being a bitch with your feminist attitude,

men are still in charge, accept your servitude.

A bad guys murderous bullets rage from an assault rifle the media boasts,

but its the good guy cops that kill the most,

it seems the killer good guys get a pat on the back,

a Founding Father right written 250 years ago,

and we all live in fear of the gun sights shadow.

They say we should do more to help the poor,

the beggar comes a knocking but they won't open the door,

what they say and what they do are completely different,

leaving the store with shopping carts full of food,

satiating their selfishness and obesity with a growing brood.

They criticize a woman for showing her cleavage,

or if she drinks too much alcoholic beverage,

its a fine line between being a lady and a tramp,

so they tell her she needs to wear make up to look pretty,

as a plain looking woman only draws pity.

They complain there is no privacy on the internet,

and hackers will always be a threat,

no matter what you do, the data is collated somewhere,

paranoid that the government can see thru their cams,

but they will continue to post on their Facebook's, Twitters and Instagram's,

They criticize people over their gay sexuality,

saying its against Gods law and their own morality,

but they will dance to their music and watch their action movies,

while maintaining its an aberration and deserves scorn,

but in secret they masturbate over internet lesbian porn,

Hey brother, I'm pleased you are proud of your skin,

I'm glad you've gotten over your historical chagrin,

we're all blood and bones underneath anyway,

but if I say that being white is the greatest,

then you scream and shout that I'm a racist.

You tell your kids to run from strangers offering candy,

as they might say "I'm a friend of your mommy and daddy",

but come Halloween we see the opposite being played out,

dressing their kids in alluring costumes and pushing them to unfamiliar doors,

asking strangers for candy to fill a cupboard drawer.

She's called a whore for what she does in many beds,

but the guys don't complain when she's giving head,

consenting adults can fuck as much as they want,

he fucks all the girls and is called a stud,

all this fucking around only leaves bad blood.

"Save the Planet" the environmentalist demands,

as he flicks a cigarette with his left hand,

driving around town in his gas guzzling S.U.V,

loudly proclaiming his sincere ethics and morality,

but fails to understand honesty and personal responsibility.

Many Godly believers say the Pope is divine,

and many atheists believe him to be asinine,

but some live their lives with admirable truth and good manners,

while others will force their point of view,

but the truly enlightened merely gaze upon azure skies of blue.

We judge everything that is different to ourselves,

and we'll pray for Gods forgiveness under pealing church bells,

our actions will always betray our self righteous words,

too much critical judgments of the strangers we see and people we meet,

and personal vindication because we're pure and sweet.

[thebeardiswriting]

A Rant About Nice Young Ladies and DMs

As usually happens when I am scrolling through tumblr a picture caught my attention today. I stopped to take a look and it turned out to be a selfie posted by a newer mutual. It showed the young woman from just below the nose to mid way down her chest. It wasn't anything spectacular, but it does show that she is probably very attractive.

Me being a helpless flirt I decided to pay her a compliment. I tried to think of something to say more than just that is was a nice picture. Everything that came to mind sounded kind of sketchy when I said it to myself and took into account I'm a stranger. She's been following me for a bit so I am sure she has seen what I write, but that doesn't mean I can talk to her like that, so I didn't.

in the end I did just tell her it was a nice pic, and me being me I confessed I couldn't think of anything else that didn't sound creepy. We ended up having a nice little conversation that sadly included her telling me about how many just horribly rude comments she got in her DMs. She said it was about 50/50 nice, polite and rude, nasty. It's gnawed at me since and I just have to say something.

What the fuck is wrong with you guys out there?

Seriously it's not hard to be polite to women, or any one else for that mater. Believe me it's not that I didn't think of the rude nasty comments. My favorite hobby is writing erotica that usually centers on power exchange and mild humiliation so I am pretty good at rude and nasty. It is pretty much a reflex for me to go through a picture and mentally go over how I would describe it in as vivid erotic detail as I can.

This young ladies picture was no different. From her full sensuous lips, along the angle of her jawline, down the sweep of her neck to the eye pleasingly ample cleavage and how her dark hair hung like a shadow down her shoulders I thought of how I would write her. Yes, I thought of how she would react to teeth dragging lightly along her jaw. I pictured rough hands on her throat and twisting in her hair. Those inviting lips stretch around a thick shaft as drool dripped onto her full breasts. All this and more shot through my mind in seconds, but I was never tempted to say any of it to her.

I couldn't even bring myself to say even mild things about about her mouth or breasts and those were pretty much all that was being shown. All I could do was say "Nice Picture" to not feel like I was a creep. Why? Because I knew anything else was out of line. There is a long list of young ladies I know on here that if they posted that picture I could say damn near anything I wanted and they would love it. The important part of that sentence is I know them. I know who likes to be called whore or slut, or have explicit comments made about them. This young ladies blog is explicit but I hadn't seen anything inviting me to make those kinds of comments to her and I find it baffling how anyone thinks it's okay.

There are ladies out their who invite strangers to talk to them that way, go find them. It's not hard. Just like it's not hard to not verbally assault someone you don't know. It doesn't mater if they post a picture showing off parts of their bodies or not. Until you know the person on the other end of the internet from you keep your dirty mind to yourself. Until you know them and that they want to hear something like that from you, Then and only then, have at it.

Oh I even let the young lady know I would be writing this even though I wasn't naming her. Why? Because it is the respectful thing to do.

[andromeda-nova-writing]

My Entire Life

Fem!Reader

Summary: When you say you can’t imagine life without each other it becomes clear to everyone that becoming a couple is only a matter of time. Who knew falling in love with your best friend was something that was going to happen.

Words: 2251

AN: Anyone who knows how to perfectly describe how Pokémon sound have my respect. 

Previous / Next

Chapter 3: Closer

Y/N hit send on her post before going back to editing some photos she took of Pokémon in the Wild Area a few weeks ago. The fog made the Ghastlys quite scary looking. It also made the photo a bit desaturated. She just needed to liven up the colors while keeping the overall tone of the picture.

Her phone rang. She considered letting it ring so she could try to focus on these photos. She grabbed the phone and answered it before checking the caller Id. “Hello.”

“Y/N I got lost again.” Leon spoke.

Y/N held in a curse. “You’re 19. I thought you’d get better at this. What’s around you?”

“Hammerlocke’s Gate.”

“I’m going to come there and fight you. Just go walk through the gate.” Y/N spat back annoyed.

Leon laughed. “You should still come. What if I actually get lost?”

“Then you can call someone else.” Y/N rolled her eyes.

“No. You should come. I know you just posted that you were bored and wanted someone to come to hang out with you.” Leon sat on the steps near the gate.

Her jaw dropped a bit. He was out here plotting up how to get her to try and meet up together. She basically gave away the information but still. “You’re an ass, you know that?” Y/N looked over at her camping gear. It was already packed up. She was supposed to go to the Wild Area tomorrow anyway.

“Aw come on. I’m free for the next three days. I’m trying to make up for last time. You know I could comment on your post and really bring the pressure on you.” Leon joked.

“We both know that’s worse for you. ‘Leon hits on internet stranger’ or maybe ‘The Champion’s new love interest?’ You want to have to get out of that mess?”

Leon sighed. “Are you bringing up when I commented about saying you had a good costume?”

Y/N smiled and got up from her desk. “Maybe. It was really funny. Risked your family-friendly image for me.”

“Don’t remind me. Our yearly costume contest came back to bite me that time.”

“I worked hard on that costume. Like rushing in 4 hours of hard work.” Y/N teased. “I feel like I looked kinda sexy in that costume. I think I also actually showed off cleavage for once in that photo.”

Leon rolled his eyes. “You did. I had to save myself by posting a photo of us trick or treating from when we were 7.”

Y/N laughed. “You never told me if you got yelled at by Olena for that.”

“I did! That’s why I had to post that photo. Are you going to actually meet me or are you just gonna make me suffer?”

“I’ll be there soon but you are paying for my taxi.” Y/N put her phone on speaker and started changing into clothes more suited for being in the Wild Area. “How long do you plan on us being out there?”

“We don’t have to stay here camping. We could just go to my apartment and catch up while watching movies.” Leon suggested.

“Ooo scandalous.” Y/N teased before laughing.

“If I didn’t know better, I’d think you like being known as my ‘secret girlfriend’. I think you like watching me get in trouble for that being in the news for stuff like that.”

Y/N laughed. “Well, it is funny since my hair is always different now. I’m 4 different mystery girls. Plus it’s lowkey revenge.”

“Revenge?” Leon asked with shock. “Revenge for what? I’ve been a great friend.”

“A great friend doesn’t miss my birthday every year since they won.” Y/N pouted.

“We could make up your birthday now. I mean that’s what I’ve been trying to do.”

“That’s five birthdays. Are you sure you're up for it? I’ve been told I have expensive taste.” Y/N pulled on a hoodie she had for a few years.

Leon rolled his eyes. “You always order water when someone else pays. I think I can pay for water.”

“Yeah but mystery girl 5 is still a bit pissed about the birthdays. She’s feeling like the real fancy type. The ‘make you wear a suit to a restaurant’ type of girl.”

“You are really having fun messing with me aren’t you?” Leon shook his head.

“Yeah. I’m about to leave. See you in a bit.” Y/N smiled.

-

Y/N had set up her camp in the Wild Area. The sun was supposed to start setting within an hour. The plan was to get some photos of the Lake of Outrage. Most photographers were scared to come to this lake since so many wild powerful Pokémon lived there. It was no problem as long as Y/N had Mimi. Her Drifloon wasn’t the strongest since they never had wanted to evolve. She wasn’t going to force her Drifloon to evolve if they didn’t want to.

Mimi was an example of why many people were scared of Mimikyu. Mimi was an insanely strong Pokémon. Easily able to scare off other Pokémon with a look and the cracking sounds of its voice. Any Pokémon that were brave enough to try and fight Mimi, well those got to have a rough playdate. 

Mimi was an extremely helpful Pokémon even out of battle. She liked to help find areas to take photos. She also loved to photobomb every now and then. Mimi was an extremely creative Pokémon. Any of Y/N creative endeavors were helped by Mimi being around. 

Y/N had been setting up her camera not focused on her surroundings. There wasn't a big need to with Mimi being out to help. She was locking the camera onto the tripod when she felt Mimi pulling on her leggings.

"I didn't know you were so excited today. The camera is almost ready. Just give me a moment.” She smiled before getting ready to attach the lens to the body of the camera.

She bent down to the camera bag only Mimi moved directly in front of the bag. Her shadow hand pointed to the right.

“I can’t get a photo if you stay in front of the lens.”

Mimi shook a no and pointed over to the right again. 

Y/N frowned. “Mimi, What?”

She made a screeching like noise and pointed to the right once again.

“Okay, I’ll look already.” She stood up shaking her before looking over to her right. She saw a Charizard walking with their trainer. “Is that...?” She squinted her eyes trying to get a better look.

Mimi creaked again.

“Good idea.” Y/N pulled her phone out of her pocket. She dialed the number waiting a moment before hearing the ringtone go off in the distance. “Oh, he better not be lost again.”

“How do you know I was going to call you in a bit?” Leon asked through the phone.

“Not even a hello? You hurt me. Mimi saw you first actually. She thinks you’re lost.” 

“Wait Mimi saw me? Are you both here?” He sounded more excited.

“Yes, she saw you. She wouldn’t even let me set up my camera.” Mimi croaked again. “It’s okay Mimi. You probably saved him from being lost for a week.”

“I’m not that lost.” Leon sounded more defeated with every word said.

“Cause that definitely sounded like a man who knows where he is. Where are you supposed to be?”

He stayed quiet for a moment. “Motostoke.”

Y/N took a breath and pinched her nose. “Where did you start?”

“By the meetup spot where the train drops you off when you leave from Wedgehurst.” He sounded like he was pouting already.

She took a breath again. “When do you need to be at Motostoke?”

“Tomorrow afternoon. I was going to go to spend the night at the hotel there but I thought it was a nice day for a walk and well you get the idea.”

Y/N took the phone away from her face. “Mimi, remind me to take you to the cafe later. I’m getting you anything you want.” 

Mimi did a few hops while making a few noises of excitement.

She put the phone back to your face. “When did you leave for your walk?”

“I think around 3ish. I see you. I’m coming over.”

“You probably should stay on the phone till you’re standing in camp.” She very much wanted to keep her sanity and Leon getting lost while being 50 ft away would drive her into insanity.

“I’m not that bad.”

“Yeah, you’re worse.” She waved with her free hand. “You see me right?”

Leon laughed. He picked up the pace. “I already said I saw you. I don’t know who trusts me less with directions, you or Mimi.”

Y/N hung up once she saw that he got close enough. She spoke a bit louder. “No one would trust you to get from your house to mine even as kids.” She exaggerated.

“I’m starting to feel attacked. I just came here to have a good time.” His voice quieted down to a normal volume as he walked closer. 

“Oh, you so aren’t trying to start guilting me into not roasting you right now.” She crossed her arms.

“A guy can try.” Leon shrugged.

Mimi wiggled over to Charizard, hopping around, and croaking a hello. Charizard growled a greeting. Charizard bent their head down toward Mimi. She bumped the top of her costume against the Charizard’s nose.

“Why does Charizard get a nice greeting but not me?” Leon placed his hand over his heart faking being offended.

“Charizard is helpful with directions unlike you.”

“Have you tried using ice types?”

Y/N playfully pushed his arm, only for Leon to not even be budged. “Where did you learn to be so rude?”

“You. Now can I get a hug from you? I haven’t seen you in a month.” Leon opened up his arms.”

Y/N went into the hug. “How many times have we run into each other like this now?”

“Lost count.”

Y/N pulled away from the hug and returned over to finish setting up the camera. “Of course you lost count.”

“We could go catch you an ice type right now. Maybe we could find a Froslass. It would keep with your team of ghost types.” Leon walked over and stood next to Y/N as she set up the camera.

“I’m not being that cold to you. I do appreciate the recommendation though. Drifloon rather just chill instead of fight and I do need to find a new Pokémon. Mimi could use a break from being the only one to help out when I come out here. It’s like every Pokémon I have just wants to have a chill time.”

“I was kidding about the Froslass.” Leon thought back to Froslass’s Pokédex entries and shook his head. “You have enough horror on your team.”

Mimi screeched and waved her shadow hands at Leon rapidly.

“You are a cute horror.” He complimented quickly with a smile.

Mimi calmed down and went back to talking to Charizard. It was quite cute to watch.

“You never actually told me why you love ghost types so much.” Leon sat down on the ground.

“Never thought I had to. You have an Aegislash and a Dragapult. I thought you would kinda get it.” Y/N started messing with the camera before taking test shots for lighting.

"Well, that's different. Your team is really just ghost types. Just thought there would be more behind it."

"Well, I guess when you look at the Pokédex, ghost types are either extremely deadly, dead, or just lonely."

"Extremely deadly might be an understatement." Leon had encountered enough problems due to a rogue ghost type. Being the strongest trainer in Galar did cause him to be sent out for some very scary situations. He didn’t like to think about them much.

"Especially with a powerful trainer. Even without one."

"Makes them all kinda scary when you think about that."

"Well all the ghost types I've found, they've always looked a bit lonely like they want a friend. Only fighting cause it's what they can do to defend themselves. Like any Pokemon." Y/N tried to lighten the mood with her reasoning.

"You aren't wrong."

"I've just thought they are only scary as a defense mechanism. Mimi for example. Most people and Pokémon would stay away from her. But she's actually, really sweet.”

They looked over to Mimi and Charizard who were playing around. “It makes sense.” Leon looked back over at Y/N and her camera. “So what are you getting photos of today?” He looked around at the almost dark sky. “Well, I guess tonight.”

“I was going to get photos of the sunset reflecting on the lake. Don’t think I can do that now.” She looked over back at Leon and placed a hand over on her hip. “Since I now have to adjust my plans. You got any ideas?”

Leon looked up at the sky then back down at the lake. “It looks like there’s gonna be a full moon tonight. It’s not a sunset reflection on the lake but it’d be just as beautiful.”

“Probably should wait for an hour or two so the moon can get bright.” Y/N turned the camera off for the time being. “Want to catch up over some food?”

“That be nice.”

[mycptsdstory]

Here’s how toxic I was back in the day (and yes I’m admitting to all my mistakes);

I used to have a big go at people and bully them when I thought they were prettier than me.

I used to cause arguments because I couldn’t have a go at my family so I had a go at strangers on the Internet. Or I used to have a big go at people who I knew.

I used to stalk people on social media and wishing my life was theirs.

When I was a kid, I used to start fights, didn’t care if I got beaten up either. I had a lot of anger problems that I didn’t know how to deal with.

I was supper attached with my abusers and speaking of them highly (especially my mother). I also didn’t realise at the time I had Trauma Bonding. (Will do a post in detail about that in the future.)

I used to drink alcohol to hide the pain. Never realising it was causing more harm than good.

I used to cause arguments with people who wronged me in the past. Didn’t think ar the time that strong feeling I had was an emotional flashback, not realising that happened long ago.

I used to gossip and bitch about people a lot, thinking that was healthy. It’s NEVER okay in anyway shape of form to do that.

I used to judge people so easily but never thinking I copied that from my mother. It’s NEVER okay to judge someone, just because you follow their lifestyle, doesn’t mean you can judge them.

I used to bully my own friends, thinking that was okay to do, since my own mother did that with her friends. It’s NEVER okay to do that.

I used put my own insecurities onto my friends and other people. Again, that’s NEVER okay to do.

I used to say “get over it” or “why can’t you be happy for once” or “can’t you just stop being depressed” or “can’t you just ‘snap it out of it’” to people who are depressed, have anxiety or have social anxiety and so on. I thought this was normal since my mother said it all the time to me and never realising I copied it from her. Again, this is NEVER okay to do.

I thought I knew everything and I used to give people really bad advice. Never realising I copied it from my mother.

I thought it was weird that some people didn’t drink alcohol. So I used to persuade my own friends to drink more. This is NEVER okay to do.

Even tho when I was living with my mother, I had two lives. Like one life where I was dating girls, having one stands with girls and going out drinking behind my families back. The other life I used to judge my own friends for being apart of LGBTQIA+ community. This is NEVER okay to do.

I used to think it was weird and strange that people are asexual and they need therapy to be into sex. I was basically judging their lives. Again, this is NEVER okay to do.

I used to judge people for marrying twice and thought they were sluts. I never realised my mother taught me this and I was copying her traits. Again, NEVER okay to do.

I thought it was okay for guys to use me and they could have sex with me, whenever they feel like (I had a lot of dissociation with sex in general).

I thought it was normal that guys would beat me up daily (I had a lot of Trauma Bonding issues).

I used to bully my own friends and other people for their disabilities, even hidden disabilities. Again, NEVER okay to do.

People used to have to walk like there’s eggshells around me. Making sure they don’t offend me. (Btw, that’s super toxic).

I used to judge people on their happiness, like people watching ASMR or something that makes them happy. Just because I don’t do what they do, doesn’t mean it’s okay to judge people’s lives. This is NEVER okay to do.

I used to judge people who go out drinking every weekend or month. This is NEVER okay to do.

I used to judge women for being pornstars or selling their bodies on the Internet; via webcam girls, models who do nudes and lingerie. I thought it was “not natural” and wrong because the bible says it’s wrong. This is NEVER okay to do. Hence why I follow Wicca now.

I used to judge other people’s religions and beliefs because the bible says it’s wrong. This is NEVER EVER okay to do. Hence why I don’t follow Christianity anymore, I follow Wicca.

I used to be super racist and thought white is the superior race. Any other race is dumb, any culture is rude and anyone who isn’t white should be poor and white people should be rich. This is NEVER EVER okay to do.

I used to think that being a transgender was wrong and they weren’t “real people”, like they had no rights and it’s wrong to change the gender because it’s against the bible. For example; you are born as a male so you should stay as a male and you are born as a female, you should stay as a female. Being transgender is “not natural and goes against God who created you”. This is NEVER EVER okay to think like that. Hence why I follow Wicca.

I used to think that women got asked for rape because women should bow down to men at all times. (I’m still shocked I used to think like this). This is NEVER EVER okay to think like that.

I used to think tattoos was the devils work and you should never get a tattoo because you’re “damaging your skin that god created for you”. This is so WRONG to think like that. Hence why I’m following Wicca and not Christianity.

I used to think that women should cover up and if you show cleavage that you’re a slut and asking to get raped. This is NEVER okay to think like that.

I thought spreading rumours about someone was okay. Even if my mother started it, I thought it was normal. This is NEVER okay to do.

I used to think it was weird and wrong that girls would have one boyfriend throughout their life. So WRONG.

I used to think that people should have lost their virginity till they were at least 13-16. This is soooo WRONG on so many levels.

I used to think it was weird and wrong if you’re still a virgin by 50+. This is WRONG.

I used to think it was wrong that a woman had children not be married. So WRONG.

I used to think the man should stay around all the time and have him around for his sakes and the children’s sake. Even tho he’s abusing the wife. This is NEVER OKAY.

I used to think divorce is wrong, even tho they are getting abused and raped daily. Completely WRONG to think that.

I used to think that people can get over death easily. That death isn’t that big of a deal. Even if they got murdered or they have committed suicide and it’s “not a big deal”. This is NEVER okay to think like this.

Suicide is wrong and they will go to hell and be tortured for the rest of time. Suicide is selfish and it’s wrong. Satan will punish the person and they should “get over” their suicidal thoughts. THIS IS NEVER EVER OKAY TO THINK LIKE THAT.

I used to think miscarriages are “not a big deal”. This is NEVER EVER okay to think like that.

I used to think doing drugs and drinking alcohol to avoid pain was normal. So toxic btw.

My family does incest and marry their cousins, fuck their uncles/aunties that’s okay to do. I thought this was normal. THIS IS NEVER EVER EVER OKAY.

I thought it was normal that my family picked my friends and the people who I date and marry. This is illegal and SO WRONG!

I thought it was weird and wrong for people who didn’t to marry outside of the families circle. Like I thought it was okay to marry my cousins or family friends. This is soooo WRONG on so many levels.

I used to think any kind of therapy was bad and they should “get over it”. This is NEVER okay to do.

I used to be such a people pleaser and everyone should like me and should be friends with me. (This is soooo toxic.)

I used force friendship on people (this also super duper toxic).

I used to think that women should marry and have kids later. So WRONG!

I used to think women should never be single parent. SO WRONG!

I used to think it was wrong that women didn’t want children and not get married. This is WRONG btw.

I thought it was wrong that people didn’t get married in a church. So WRONG!

All LBGTQIA+ shouldn’t get married, they are not human beings and they go against the bible. This is so stupid and so WRONG!

I used to think men who dress up as drag queens are “not natural” and it goes against the bible and they should be thrown in jail and hell. So this is NEVER okay to think like that.

I used to think that people who didn’t swear are weird and “unnatural”. This is so toxic.

I used to judge peoples kinks and fetishes. This is soooo toxic.

I used to think guys raping me was okay and I was “asking for it” or they were “entitled” to have sex with me. Aka rape me was okay. This is NEVER EVER okay to think like that.

I used to shit stir with my friends and cause arguments within friendship groups. This is soooooo toxic.

I used to think only women are victims to domestic abuse and men should “man up”. THIS IS SO WRONG!

I used to think that everyone should marry, have children and live how the bible says. Soooo WRONG!

I used to think adults watching cartoons (not anime) is babyish and wrong. This is so toxic btw.

I used to think men should only game and not women. So wrong.

I used to think some jobs should be a mans only job and the women should stay in the kitchen. Super toxic btw.

I used to think that everyone should go to church and if they don’t, they will go to hell. This is so stupid btw.

I used to think that single dads are going to be bad dads and the children should go to the woman. Also that woman should be married to a different man so they can’t be single and grow up a child/children on their own. This is soooo toxic.

I used to think women shouldn’t have their own business and women should stay in the kitchen. This is super toxic.

It’s a mans job to be in the military and women can’t because they are women. Women can’t shoot because they are women. Again, so toxic and so WRONG!

I used to think that you can’t have children and work at the same time. So toxic btw.

I used to think children are dumb and they don’t understand when you call them names. Btw they do understand and they are not dumb in anyway shape or form.

I used to think that a still borns death is normal and they should never grieve. The woman should blame herself for the still birth. This is so WRONG ON SO MANY LEVELS!

I think that’s everything. Sorry it’s a huge list, I just had to write it down because I know I was toxic before. So writing down all my mistakes, honestly makes me feel better, like I’m admiting my wrongs and I’m trying not to be a toxic person. Trying not to be like my mother.

[dreamland96]

March 27, 2021

I started this blog because for some reason there is nothing more satisfying than spilling your feelings on the Internet. One of my closest friends decided to hop back on Tumblr and since my classical old one filled with teenage angst is officially deleted, it felt nice to start over new. 

I think I’m going to start right with the nitty-gritty shit and fuck all introductions because I tend to hide a lot of my feelings lately and I’m just tired of not being raw. I intend on keeping this blog fairly anonymous so I don’t really have anything to lose. 

Tumblr was actually kind of traumatizing to me in a really real way. I have never thought I was someone who had “repressed memories,” but recently a really dark one came back to me in a real way, and it has been pretty fucking hard to cope with. It’s crazy the way your mind can kind of just be like “AY THAT SHIT SEEMS LIKE IT IS TOO TOUGH FOR YOU TO DEAL WITH RIGHT NOW, LETS FILE THAT SHIT AWAY ALL THE WAY IN THE BACK OF YOUR HEAD AND HAVE YOU DEAL WITH IT LATER LMAOOO”

When I had a Tumblr in the past, I was an insecure 15 year old girl and would post pictures of myself to the site in the hope of male validation. I hate how many terrible places my low self esteem has landed me, honestly. Some of them showed cleavage, but it honestly never really was anything that revealing. I remember getting a message from a blog complimenting me, and I said thank you but I never really thought more from it. But then later, that same blog told me to check them out, so I did. It was a blog of a 40 year old man who just jerked off to random people. This complete stranger on the Internet had printed out pictures of my 15 year old face and made a 15 minute video jerking himself off to me. I remember having a panic attack and feeling so fucking disgusted and violated. I told him to take it down before I got law enforcement involved, which was pretty fucking smart for a teenager, which is credit I’ll give myself. He called me a bitch and told me that it “really wasn’t that big of a deal” but I blocked him and then the memories of this even happening for the next ten years of my life. 

In all honesty, this probably isn’t even the worst way I’ve been violated, but there was something about it that was just particularly humiliating and as a 24 year old woman I get so fucking ANGRY and I just want to protect my younger self from ever dealing with that. I want fucking justice. I want to find that guy and fucking expose him and ruin his fucking life for thinking that way okay. If that had happened to my little cousin, or daughter, or any other girl in my life I cared about, I would have ripped that man to shreds. I know that somewhere in the dark depths of the Internet, that video still probably exists, and it makes me fucking sick. People are fucking sick. Although it shouldn’t surprise me, I’m still genuinely surprised with how some people are so fucking twisted. FUCK. 

Writing it out did feel better, so I enjoyed doing so. I think this blog is going to be extremely cathartic for me. Damn. 

[ravenruns]

Long Run Report

Today’s run was 18.03 miles at 3:26. Not spectacular but that includes water stops and pausing a few times to look at birds. The Red-Shouldered Hawks were out hunting and I saw them several times, including once when the hawk just sat on a tree branch and screamed at me. Dude, I’m just running, I’m not trying to mess up your breakfast.

I would post the map but I can’t figure out how to get it from Fitbit without screenshots - it won’t share the actual route map. I mainly wanted to share because you can actually see where my GPS signal cut in and out, plus I didn’t use my house as a starting point so it’s not like, “Here’s a map to where I live! Enjoy, random internet strangers!” It just amused me that I apparently ran through a swamp a couple of times.

Also - boobs. Holy shit. Either I’ve lost more chest mass or something is wrong with my sports bras because I have the worst raw, chafed skin. Taking a shower was agony. My entire ... I dunno, cleavage? Help, I’m terrible at girl stuff ... the skin all along my sternum is completely raw. After showering (people three states away likely heard me when the water hit my skin) I put some shea butter on it, and that feels better. Considering having Mister pick up some zinc cream, or that diaper rash stuff. Boudreaux’s Butt Paste, LOL.

I have been getting these sports bras that zip up the front because they’re easy to get on and off, especially as I have trouble raising that left arm over my head. Obviously I’m going to have to find something else, and do it fast - RunDisney is the first week of January. Given that my shoulders have raw spots where the straps chafed, too, I think I may just be in need of a smaller size, and should go try some on when I’m next out.

[trendsdresscom]

Aussie Stunner Gabby Epstein Spills Out Of Plunging, Polka-Dot Swimsuit That Leaves Little To The Imagination

Gabby Epstein is showing some serious skin in her latest Instagram update.

The Aussie stunner took to her account on Thursday to share a steamy new set of snaps that sent temperatures soaring on her feed. The upload included a total of four photos of the model posing outside at nighttime while the bright flash of the camera illuminated her flawless figure.

In the caption of her post, Gabby noted that it was “O-Week” in Australia — the orientation period at universities before classes begin. In celebration of the event, the blond bombshell revealed to her 2.3 million followers that the popular clothing line Pretty Little Thing was offering students a steep discount of 55 percent off of their purchases.

Sale or no sale, many fans seemed captivated by the 23-year-old beauty, who looked absolutely incredible in the skimpy, polka-dotted swimsuit from the U.K.-based brand that left very little to the imagination.

Gabby sizzled in a barely-there one-piece that did way more showing than covering up. It featured a halter-style neckline that showcased her toned arms — but that was just the beginning of the babe’s skin-baring display. The number also boasted a daringly low-cut neckline that was barely enough to contain her voluptuous chest, leaving an ample amount of cleavage spilling out from nearly every angle.

Upping the ante of the Instagram hottie’s look was its cheeky design, which she revealed to her audience by posing with her back to the camera. The scandalous style exposed her pert derriere almost in its entirety, while also giving fans a look at her toned legs. The garment also featured a unique tie-belt that was knotted high up on her hips to accentuate Gabby’s trim waist and slender frame.

To complete the itty-bitty ensemble, Gabby added a pair of dainty hoop earrings that provided just the right amount of bling. She tied her platinum tresses in a low, messy bun, and opted for a minimal makeup look that allowed her natural beauty to shine.

Unsurprisingly, the social media sensation’s latest Instagram appearance was a huge hit with her followers. The post has racked up over 58,000 likes after 11 hours of going live, as well as hundreds of comments with compliments for Gabby’s jaw-dropping display.

“Looking absolutely superb beautiful lady,” one person wrote.

Another said that Gabby was “the sexiest beast on the internet.”

“You are so stunning it’s unreal!!” commented a third.

Gabby is no stranger to wearing risque swimwear. Earlier this week, the stunner flaunted her killer curves in an impossibly tiny hot pink bikini that just barely abided by Instagram’s nudity guidelines. That look also proved popular with fans, who awarded the snaps nearly 75,000 likes.

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from Trends Dress https://trendsdress.com/2020/02/21/aussie-stunner-gabby-epstein-spills-out-of-plunging-polka-dot-swimsuit-that-leaves-little-to-the-imagination/

[beau7x-blog]

Chapter 1.

Beau looked at herself in the mirror as she adjusted the apron on her uniform. She took a deep breath and clenched her hands into tight fists to stop them from shaking "It's just for a week" she whispered to herself. It had taken a lot of courage and determination for the shy, anxious 24-year-old to take the 18 hour flight from Brisbane, Australia to San Diego USA. But, as previously mentioned, she was determined. This may be a once in a life time opportunity and she was not going to miss it. Beau had signed up to serve as a waitress in the "FamilyJules Jamily Maid Café", a patreon goal that was initially set up as a joke, because it never seemed possible that it would happen. But over time, and with enough support and stubbornness, the goal was met, and Jules had no choice. A lot of organization and time went into the project, with it being settled on renting an old empty house for approximately two weeks to run the 'donation-only' (for legal and tax purposes) café downstairs, while having certain guests, mainly volunteer staff, board in the rooms upstairs. Beau knew nobody here. Not really. She'd talked to them online and even skyped with a few but she'd never met them in person. She had never worked as a waitress, she had never been to the States, never boarded with strangers, and all of these things terrified her. Yet, here she was. She somehow felt comfortable with all these 'strangers' around her. Probably because she knew that only "Jamily" members were allowed access to the café, and she knew that they were one of the friendliest and most supportive communities you can find on the internet. Everyone who has or will, step foot in that house, were there for the same reason; to support and share a common interest that they loved. While Beau's anxiety tends to make her catastrophize everything, she had been met with nothing but utmost kindness and smiles. However, she could not shake this feeling of unease. An awkwardness if you will; the feeling of someone watching you get dressed or being spied on in the shower. She looked at her new maid uniform. She liked it; the thigh high black stocking with a white lace trim were soft and fuzzy – not too tight or too loose. The black dress was tailor made of soft cotton that swished a little when she turned. The puffy cap sleeves sat comfortably on her shoulders, and the apron was only as tight as she made it. She scrutinized her face. She rarely wore makeup but felt it an appropriate occasion. Nothing fancy; a little foundation to even out her skin tone, a bit of mascara and eyeliner forming a wing. The hue of lipstick was only a few shades darker than her natural color, nothing too bright or overdramatic. Was it the cat ears? Every maid had a choice of headwear: a bow, traditional frill, or cat ears. Beau had chosen the last thinking it was cute and fairly innocent, but now she doubted herself. Was it too much? Was she trying too hard to be cute and relatable? Maybe it didn't quite fit with her hairstyle; Her long fine brown hair pulled into a tight bun with a side fringe swept to the right of her face. She knew she looked better with her hair down but found it easier to work with it up. It was a good balance of efficiency and aesthetic. It wasn't the cat ears. Beau knew exactly what was making her stomach knot but unfortunately couldn't do anything about it. Underneath the frilly lace collar was a love heart cut out across the bust section of the dress, only making her tightly fitted cleavage even more glaringly obvious. She frowned. She bit her lower lip. She growled quietly low in her throat in indecision. She had the option of adding a long bow to the collar to hang down across the cutout but was afraid it might draw more attention, rather than hide it. She considered asking one of the men next door if she could borrow a tie instead, then remember they had opted for bowties instead. She huffed "No one's going to care, calm down. You are literally the only one making a big deal out of this." She pinned her name badge above her left breast. The black and gold plate read "Beau" with 'Beau7x' in a smaller font underneath it. If anyone were to recognize her it would be by her chat name, not her face. She quietly tiptoed down the hall and to the ground floor. It was only 7.14 a.m. and the café didn't open until 10 a.m. but she was too excited and wanted to get a head start to make sure everything was ready for opening day. The ground floor of the house was fairly large. All of the walls previously separating the rooms had been knocked down so now it was only split into two areas; the main room which would serve as the café, and the kitchen. The main room was set up with tables covered in an assortment of tablecloths and none of them had matching chairs. Some large wingback armchairs left by the original owner were positioned in front of the large fireplace near the front corner of the house, opposite the front entrance. Bookcases framed the wall high windows filled with tableware, books, toys, and board games for patrons to use at their leisure. On the opposing wall were dozens of pictures sent by other Jamily members of themselves, their pets, memes and artwork they had created and submitted to decorate the house. Beau headed to the back of the room towards the serving counter. Two people were already there, one was sitting on a barstool eating cereal, the other behind the counter making coffee. "Good morning." Beau called out quietly "Morning" the man behind the counter replied blearily. "Good morning." The other replied after removing the spoon from their mouth, trying not to spit milk over the counter. "You know we don't open for another few hours." The man behind the counter called over his shoulder "I know," Beau nodded. "Just couldn't sleep" "Same" he replied, taking the first sip of his coffee. Beau took a seat at the counter next to the person eating cereal who introduced themselves as ShinytheLarvitar. "It's a pleasure to finally meet you Shiny." Beau smiled at them. The man behind the counter introduced himself as ChaoticMeatball "Coffee?" He offered. "No thanks, I don't drink coffee." He narrowed his eyes at her, "How can you work at a café and not like coffee?" "Because I'm not here for coffee?" She questioned his accusation "But how can you make good coffee if you don't drink it?" "'Cause I don't need to drink coffee to know how to work a coffee machine." "Yeah, but, how do you know if it's good?" "Do you drink or eat every edible item you prepare for someone else?" "Well, no." "Then how do you know if it's good?" "Cause, well...hm. I see your point." he gave up arguing "So, what are you going to do this morning, Beau?" Asked Shiny Beau stretched her back as she thought, "Well, I need to decorate the cakes still, but other than that," She shrugged, "Maybe I can make it last until ten? I also want to set up some more decorations." They both looked around the room filled with balloons, confetti, streamer and I big banner that read "Welcome Home Jamily" across the windows. "Where?" Asked Shinty "Good point." Beau agreed, "I guess, I'll find something to keep me occupied." She added, slinking off towards the kitchen to start work. Throughout the day it seemed less like she was working as a waitress/maid at a café and more like a giant family reunion she was helping out with. People had started to pour in with luggage and gifts, exclaiming arrivals and hugging people they had never met until today. It was the most uplifting and wholesome environment Beau had ever had the pleasure of being present in. "God, why can't life just always be like this?" She shrugged to KelsanFL as she poured them some fresh tea. "I know right? Why do people have to be mean to one another? If you don't like someone, leave them alone. It's literally that simple." "Exactly. Life is hard enough as it is. It actually takes more effort to be an asshole. That's why I love seeing all you lovely people, " Beau beamed, "Reminds me there are good people in the world." Luckily, she wasn't requested to do anything too nefarious, or anything she was uncomfortable with at all. There were rules posted by the front door and on the back of the menus that stated any inappropriate or lewd behavior would lead to the patron being asked to leave, and if they refused, they would be removed by force if necessary. It also stated that if any maid/butler were assaulted, they had permission to handle the situation accordingly, including violence if they so wished, an idea Beau had no problem with. She believed the majority of people were either unaware or too uncomfortable of all the things they could ask the maids to do, so she offered a few things such as feeding them, giving shoulder massages, playing a game, and having a drink with them (Just one though, she did have a job to do.) Her role involved mainly waitressing. Anytime a new patron would walk in she would immediately bow and say "Welcome home." And escort them to a table, take their orders, serve them, clean afterwards and repeat the process. Her back ached and her feet were burning but she didn't want to stop. It wasn't until half past seven at night that she realized she had been working nonstop excluding her lunch break. LadybugSheep tried to convince her to stop and take the rest of the night off. "But, we're only open for another half hour, so I might as well keep going." "Beau you still need to shower and have dinner and if tomorrow is anything like today, you're going to need all the rest and sleep you can get." Beau groaned, "But I'm not tiiirreedd." "No buts! Now get in the kitchen and grab some dinner before the chefs finish up." Ladybug ordered. Beau sighed defeated, too tired to argue now. "Fine." She said and removed her apron and cat ears and headed towards the kitchen. "Finally finished eh?" One of the chefs called out. "Yeah. I've been up since about six or seven so, Ladybug kinda kicked me out." She smiled "Jeez, they really ride you guys hard huh?" "Depends on how I'm feeling on the night" she smirked. "Actually, we can work however long or short we like." "And you wanted to work for twelve hours?" Beau smiled at him and shrugged. "Would you like some dinner then?" He asked "That's okay, I'm just going to steal one of the premade sandwiches." "Don't be ridiculous." He rolled his eyes. "Go sit out there and I'll bring you something." He pointed his knife towards the dining room "Are you sure? You don't have to." "It would be my pleasure" he assured her. "Now go and sit down for once." Beau let down her hair and headed to the dining hall. The place was packed with people talking, playing games and enjoying a few drinks. Not wanting to intrude on anyone she sat down at a barstool by the counter and watched everyone go by. She was watching a couple at a nearby table playing slaps when everyone was interrupted by a loud exclamation from the front of the house "PAPA'S HOME!" A broad smile immediately spread across Beaus face as she stood up and bowed "Welcome home Papa!" Her voice swirled with the chorus of others calling out the same, cheering and clapping Jules had finally come to the café, with a large group behind him including Adrianna, Delcake, Darkages, Jonathan Young, Richaad, and a few other she couldn't see from the back of the café. Too shy to approach anyone and sure it wasn't the only opportunity she would have to introduce herself, Beau was happy to just watch everyone from the back, grinning stupidly, and soaking up the positive feeling of happiness, excitement and love.

[smokeybrandcompositions]

Generational Apps

My Instagram is full of pictures relevant to my life. There’s stuff i eat on there, stuff i cooked, games i’ve played or was mad hype for, things i’ve always wanted, people i absolutely adore; It’s a wealth of information about me. That being said, there’s not really that many pictures OF me on it. Same with my Facebook. Aside from this Tumblr account which  i use basically in the same manner, i don’t really have social media. No Snap or Twitter or any of those other burgeoning apps that allow you to be tracked and cataloged according to your browsing habits. Hell the only reason i have a Facebook is because that’s easier than giving away my phone number to everyone whenever i decide to move across the country. it’s already happened three times. It’ll happen again toward the end of this year. sort of.

I was already an adult when Myspace dropped, the genesis of this whole oversharing phenomenon. Again, i got one because the majority of my friends had one. I never really used the thing but, admittedly, i used it more than my Facebook but still, it was rare. I never got on board with all of this social media nonsense. Maybe it’s because i’m kind of anti-social or maybe because all of this sh*t is stupid but i passed on the hype. Fast forward until now and it’s wild to see how far this stuff has come. Facebook is one of the most powerful organizations in the world. They literally make money like entire countries. Seriously, they make more cash than 90 percent of the world’s GDP. Yearly. That sh*t is wild! And stupid!

I bring this up because my little brother is dating a 20 year old and, a a 20 year old, she had to follow all of us in the circle on social media. I told her if she could figure out who i was, i’d follow her and she did, so i did. I’m a man od my word. A i perused her Insta, i was astonished with how many pictures if herself were there. Like, that’s all she takes is pictures of herself. She occasionally takes pictures of her due at the moment but mostly, it’s just her. Now, ma is attractive to people. I know this because i watched my brother’s circle of friend basically eat each other in an attempt to have a chance a t eating her. I don’t think she’s all that cute but i can understand, objectively, why people might believe otherwise. Ma is a busty ass redbone. That mess is crazy coveted in the hood. She’s aware of that fact, to, and she uses her Insta specifically for that. Like, she fishes for compliments. He posts before and after shots of her makeup. She always has those angles where her cleavage is showing. And cats eat that sh*t up. She’s flooded with compliments and what not and it makes her feel good. The adoration of strangers, passing internet acquaintances, gives hr life and i find that to be just the saddest thing ever.

More so than that, she’s  weaponized her social media. Whenever she gets into a fight with her significant other, she deletes all of their pictures f the Insta. She’ll drag them to her friends on Facebook. Yo she rails and rails in that echo chamber. Cats literally just tell her what she wants to hear, that she’s beautiful and vulnerable and totally always in the right, even though she admittedly takes joy in being the pettiest. We got into it once because of her wild, unapologetic, immaturity so i threw her out of my house. In retaliation, she deleted me from her Facebook. A few weeks later, she popped up at my house when she wasn’t suppose to and apologized for everything and made it a point to emphasize that she unfriended me or whatever. I told her i didn’t care and she was visibly hurt. Seriously, i struck a blow to this chick over my indifference to her acceptance of a follow. That sh*t is crazy to me.. I t was like a direct assault on her person. I might have punched the lights out of her ego, in that second or so. I don’t understand that sh*t. You know me. You’ve lived with me. You date my brother. You can call or text m whenever you want. Who gives a sh*t about Facebook statuses?

I’d say this was an isolated thing but kids her age take this social media sh*t seriously. They physically fight each other over it. i literally watched an argument over Facebook, escalate into a fist fight outside my house. Motherf*cker, why? Who cares what a friend of one of your friends said online in passing? That less than someone calling you a b*tch to your face and even then, i’m not risking jailtime to prove how macho i am. I’m not f*cking up my life because this guy doesn’t like me. That’s dumb as sh*t! but to these kids, that sh*t is real. They measure their worth by how many friends they have. They get violent over status updates. Lives are ruined because About Mes aren’t updated properly. It’s f*cking stupid. In the end, i think i’m just to old for this ah*t. I was an adult by the time any of this was a thing. I grew up in a pre-google world. I great up in a pre-internet world. We went outside and played with each other. I suppose the group chat is this generation’s playground now.