#today in global

[inkskinned]

you have to go to work so you can pay for your doctor, who is not taking your insurance right now, and if you say i can't afford the doctor's you are told - get a better job. it is very sad that you are unwell, yes, but maybe you should have thought about that before not having a better job.

(where is the better job? who is giving out these better jobs? you are sick, you are hurting - how the hell are you supposed to be well enough for this better job?)

but you go to the doctor because you had the nerve to be hurt or sick or whatever else. and they tell you that it is because you have anxiety. you try your best. you are a self-advocate. you've done the reading (which sometimes pisses them off worse, honestly). you say it is actually adding to my anxiety, it is effecting my quality of life. so they say that you are fat. they say that all young people have this happen to them, isn't it a medical marvel! they say that you should eat more vegetables. they say that you probably just need to lose a little more weight, and that you are faking it for attention.

(what attention could this doctor possibly give? what validation? that's their fucking job, isn't it?)

there is always a hypochondriac, right. someone always tells you about a hypochondriac. or someone who is unnecessarily aggressive during the worst days of their life. or someone looking "for a quick fix". or some idiot who wasn't educated about how to properly care for themselves who just abandons their treatment. and again, the hypochondriac, the overly-cautious hysteric. these people don't deserve to be treated like humans (right), and since you might be one of these people, you also don't get treated like a human. because those people can really fuck with the system, you now have to pay for it. and besides. you're actually probably faking it.

(more often than not, you find a 2:1 ratio of these stories. for every "hypochondriac", there are 2 people who knew something was wrong, and yet nobody could fucking find it. the story often ends with pointless suffering. the story often ends with and now it's too late, and it's going to kill me.)

you are actually just making excuses. someone else got that procedure or that diagnosis and he's fine, you should be fine too. someone else said they watched a documentary about other inspirational people with your exact same condition, maybe you should be inspirational, too. you're just too morbid. your pain and your experience is probably just not statistically concerning. it is all self-reported anyway, and you're just being a baby.

(once, while sitting down in the middle of making coffee, you had the sudden, horrible thought - i could kill myself to make the pain stop. you had to call your best friend after that. had to pet your dog. had to cry about it in the shower. you won't, but that moment - god, fuck. the pain just goes on and on.)

you know someone who went in for routine surgery and said i still feel everything. they told her to just relax. it took her kicking and screaming before they figured out she wasn't lying - the anesthetic drip hadn't been working. you know someone who went in for severe migraines who was told drink water and lose weight. you know someone who was actively bleeding out and throwing up in the ER and was told you're just having a bad period.

in the ER there are always these little posters saying things like "don't wait! get checked today!" and you think about how often you do wait. how often the days spool out. you once waited a full week before seeing the doctor for what you thought was a sprained wrist. it had actually been broken - they had to rebreak it to set it.

but you go into the doctor. the problem you're having is immediate. the person behind the counter frowns and says we're not taking your insurance. you will be paying for this out-of-pocket.

they send you home with tylenol and a little health packet about weight loss or anxiety or attention deficit. on the front it has your birthday and diagnosis. you think about crying, and the words swim. it might as well say go fuck yourself. it might as well say you're a fucking idiot. it might as well say light your money on fire and lie down in it. and the entire fucking time - the problem persists.

it's okay. it's okay, it's just another thing, you think. it's just another thing i have to learn to live with.

[psykopaths]

The Hidden Life of Trees, (2020)

[sioneve]

Today marks the 10th anniversary of Nicomaki duet song "ずるいよMagnetic today" release! 🩷❤️

At this point I treat the song’s release date like nicomaki couple anniversary 💀 i mean!! a duet song!! WITH VERY PERSONALIZED LYRICS ABOUT THEM TOO….. pls let me have a long life so i can make it every year 😇🙏

the last time i made anniversary art for zurui yo magnetic today was in 2019! It’s getting the biggest number i’ve ever posted on tumblr lol (but that is definitely cuz of the wild almost-to-kiss-tension-pose lol)

enjoy the meal for every nkmk shipper if you’re still breathing?? nicomaki will be forever my top, it surpasses all my ships across the universe. I love you both my dumbass magnet 🩷❤️

imagine applying physics reference to your art

process (lots of skipped parts i forgot to save)

[a-dowryofblood]

[sleepsucks]

heya, no post today + won't be queuing any for the rest of the week either; instead i'll queue up reblogs for useful resources to support this week's global strike for palestine >

[popcornfairy28]

[harundraws]

doing some curiouscat - art requests in honor of hitting 1k follows on twitter and someone requested *checks notes* "GENLISSA BARK BARK BARK ABRK ABRKK ABRK" so here is genlissaaaaa ♡

[ballpitwitch]

Keanu Reeves performs with his band Dogstar at The Roxy on July 18, 2023 in Los Angeles, California.

[justfriendsbestthings]

Simon’s Month Day 13: Hoodie

@youngroyals-events

[noxious-fennec]

Alright. I want you all made perfectly aware that I have completely cut support for Wilbur soot and any associated projects. I find his "apology" to be disingenuous and trashy damage control, and it undermines whatever desire he has to improve, however genuine that is.

I 100% support Shelby and any victim of such disgusting behaviour, i commend them for their courage, and I wish them nothing but prosperity, support, and happiness. I will always value their peace over whatever art he made. I'll find other fucking art.

[actualbird]

thank you sOOOSOSOSOSOSOSOOO MUCH TO HAZEL @seven-tastic FOR THIS ADORABLE HARPY!LUKE I COMMISSIONED THEM FOR!!!! hes so proud of his little nest now everybody tell him he did a good job right now, and while youre at it, go look at hazel's art because everything they do is FANTASTIC

[canadiancryptid]

Tumblr has added a new feature, and its time for me to play everybody's favorite game:

IS THERE A LIMIT?

[unknownarmageddon]

geddon im fucking sobbinh i got an essay prompt from cross

BAHAHAH???? well. are you gonna give him his more than 122 words about the french revolution /silly/silly

[valoale]

Helsinki, Finland 18.01.2024