#totally harmless

[rewiredmind]

Now they're all little

(I promise I do take art seriously)

[yume-fanfare]

i hear there might have been some trouble at the flambé teddy bear toss, something about fairies

[piratefishmama]

are people really gettin mad over the totally not-invasive one piece tab?

[thornychairman]

"HIII! MY NAME IS KEVIN AND I'M THE HEAD OF THE COMPLAINTS DEPARTMENT! Remember....if you don't follow the ToS or void the warranty, we're not responsible for your service or purchase breaking or not working out! It's highly recommended you follow all instructions to. The. T! Otherwise you may be subject to death and dismemberment -- oops, I read that announcement wrong! I meant displeasure and disappointment! Hahahaha. Have a good day, folks! With love, Kevin from Macro Cosmos!"

[gaywineauntsstuff]

I have a REQUEST of non dick Grayson fanfiction writers

If you’re writing a fic and you need a way to write Dick out a la ‘Cass was busy in Hong Kong’ PLEASE MAKE IT THE MOST NONSENSICAL thing I’ve ever read

I wanna see

“Dick was busy fighting the devil in hell… he said he was fine so we’re leaving him be”

“I called dick and he just said no? And hung up?? So I’m guessing he’s busy?”

“ Dick was kidnapped by a space monarch and the titans are trying to bargain for him back… he didn’t do anything wrong they just like him and his wanna keep him”

“He’s stuck in a barrel rn”

“Dick is trapped in a noir film”

“He’s busy at the MET”

“I would call Dick but I think he’s on a remote island battling deathstroke rn and I don’t wanna be involved in all that”

“I would call Dick but he’s in Amazon rainforest and they have bad signal”

Are you seeing the vision? Like I want SILVER AGE NONSENSE FOR MY BOY. Like bro is just chilling firmly OUTSIDE the story

Like Tim is doing his whole angst plotline and he tries to call dick and he gets “hey Timmy would love to stay and chat but I’m being chased by sentient cotton candy and I gotta find a water source love you ciao”

Jason needs Allies and he calls Dick and it’s like “hey sorry would love to help but I’m in an alien deathmatch for the crown of a nation and I’m being attacked by a meat cleaver thing? Bye don’t get blown up again! Love you”

Damian needs a place to chill after Bruce is an asshole “sorry kid would love to help but i am currently in the Gotham sewers being handfed cheesecake don’t ask it’s a long story I’ll tell you when you’re 18 bye”

Babs needs him for something “would love to help but I’m having a tea party with a being beyond comprehension and if I blink I’ll die so send me details and I’ll get back to you when slash if I’m alive in 5-6 business days.”

Bruce calls “I’m herding space cows rn is everyone alive? If not tell me now so I don’t have to find out from a newspaper? No everyone’s fine. Lovely. Delete this number”

[elaenim]

My piece for the @opshankszine

Grab something while aftersales are still ongoing !!!

[pangur-and-grim]

in hotter weather, Chiefcake likes to sleep in the bathroom because of the cool tiles. but unfortunately she is VERY territorial, so when using the toilet, you will be attacked.

she just boxes you and growls, so I tolerate it without much thought, but guests get quite alarmed if they're not warned. what makes it worse is that she sleeps behind the toilet, which hides her completely!

[nikki-152006]

Them: Kittens can't look scary. Me:

[runecatwrites]

Y’all, the fact that someone had to explain to Sky what a rabbit is, in detail, makes this jab 1000% funnier.

(X) Like, Sky doesn’t have rabbits in his era. He’s never seen one before this adventure. His closest frame of reference would be a remlit, which is both super cute and super vicious. He probably would have initially seen Legend’s dark world form and thought that rabbits had their own special brand of viciousness too. If that were the case, he wouldn’t have poked fun at Legend like this. But no. He seems fully aware that rabbits are skittish, fearful, practically harmless prey animals.

And someone made a point to explain that to him specifically.

The most likely culprit, I think?

TWILIGHT 😏

[crushedsweets]

It makes me sooo sad when people make a cute/happy/familial/ship/fandomy creepypasta post and they feel the need to be like “but I get it’s totally unrealistic like it could never be canon like I know they’re actually heartless and would kill eachother but I just like when they’re happy ik it’s cringe stupid fanon though” YOU DESERVE TO MAKE A HAPPY OR SILLY OR CUTE POST WITHOUT REPRIMANDING YOURSELF FOR ENJOYING THE FICTIONAL CHARACTERS YOUVE PROBABLY LOVED SINCE CHILDHOOD!!!! YOU SHOULDNT HAVE TO DEFEND YOUR INTEREST IN LIGHTHEARTED FLUFFY CONTENT!!! IT IS A BEAUTIFUL THING TO CONSUME POSITIVE CONTENT!!! YOU DO NOT HAVE TO CONSUME HARDCORE EDGY CRUEL GRUESOME CONTENT IF ITS NOT YOUR PREFERENCE!!!! Please. We all want you to be happy. Whether you enjoy fandom-style content or dark serious horror.

[bluxhi]

LMAO HE DIDNT GIVE A DAMN ANYMORE AT THAT POINT-

Sabre in the beginning of TSS: this is terrible, blue steve is so mean, he’s the strongest Steve

Sabre later: yeah so I punched a steve god in the face, laughed about it and got 100k views on YouTube

[moomoochan]

[halenhusky309]

Sure Jiang Cheng loved Jiang Yanli but that racoon had zero respect for his sister, from spitting on his sister's sacrifice by leading the seige to kill Wei Wuxian, to treat Jin Ling like he was a nuisance child and barely spare any word of love and care...

It's no way better to treasure your sister memories than to harm her dear shidi and treat her son "lovingly" with insulting, degrading words and threats, and occasional slappings.

[sanityshorror]

When the two most evil creepypastas are so unserious together. This is so stupid but I needed to get the mental image of this out. 😭💔

Pov: Tommy Taffy invited Julius the Dressmaker to join him and your family for dinner.

Y/N: 😅 I'm so glad to have your friend, Julius, join us for dinner, Tommy! 😅

Julius: mhm, this is going to be--

Tommy, interrupts to burst into song: -ALMOST HEAVEN, West Virginia!

Julius: ... blue ridge mountains, SHENANDOAH RIVER!

Tommy: life is old there, older than the trees! Younger than the mountains, growing like a brEEZE!

Julius and Tommy: COOUUYNTRYYY ROOOOADS, TAAAAAKE MEEEE HOMEEE, TO THE PLACE I BELONG-

Y/N, beyond done: --holy shit, shut up, shut up, SHUT UP YOU BOZOS! 👺

Julius: ...

Tommy: ...--WEST VIRGINIA, MOUNTAIN MAMA!

Julius: TAKE ME HOME, coouuuntryy rooooads!

Y/N: that's it, I'm killing myself.