#toxic lesbians fr

[lunar-sams]

you're not all bad.

[terra-tortoise]

fully going ham with these beasts meet harte and lin theyre not registered yet and idk if they yellow is acceptable but theyre wormed into my brain (art linework from the subspecies thread, linked in both their bios)

[kissingagrumpygiant]

i have to draw more rhaenicent .

[creatuesfromthedeep]

They taught us well, we were first in our classes We learned to see through many glasses How to sink and how to fly, we learned to watch each other die My God, this course is harder than we thought

Ways to Love - Jason Webley

Kireg

[bibiana112]

Everyone leave me alone I need to listen to Juri singing in the musical adaptation on loop for at least four hours before I recover

[solibrie]

the way people talk about the black rose arc as filler makes me want to explode. whatever happened to characterization.

[transsexualjoanofarc]

To be fair transhet Michael would also have to deal with feeling like a degenerate, it's just that he manages to hide it after a while...but his family still knows and he's painfully aware of that

i think transhet michael thinks if he 1) performs masculinity well enough & 2) likes Women in a Manly way & Doesnt like Men because hes a Man & Men Like Women (also point one but iwth extra steps) than it wont be a problem fr him like if he does the Being A Guy & Not In A Gay Way thing hard enough that he will just be another normal guy fella & get away with it all this does is make him deeply insecure y the way ☝️

[gayrudeboys]

no one told me velma was just straight up abusive in mystery incorporated wtf

[aedemoth]

House of the Dragon is a lot more bearable and relatable of a show when you pretend that Alicent Hightower is a lesbian and just super repressed

[haechvn]

Dating Shuri Udaku Headcanons

Pairing: Shuri x F!Reader

Warning: Fluff, Toxic!Shuri, Angst and Smut since yall nasty asf

Summary/Request: I got so many requests for an update so here it is!

Word Count: 1k words

Author’s Note: I decided to make her mean since you hoes wanna be treated like shit or whatever. I'm getting back into my groove with this one for sure. 18+ MDNI fr or imma beat yall ass. NEED MORE SHURI GIFS WTH

Taglist: @inmyheadimobsessed @theblacksuccubus @melodykisses @blackhottie25 @tonakings @coalmistyy @szalipcombo @prettyluhlaiiii @yelenabelovasgf @callmeoncette @clqrosmgc @theblacksuccubus @cherios @shuris-whore @nut4shuri @gaspyghosttt @elliesdinosauar @idkhersposts @ziayamikaelson @trinthebean @sleepingnova @yunhofingers

Credits: @anitalenia for the super cute dividers get into itttt

Fluff 

Cooks breakfast for you every morning after the two of you have sweet and reckless nights together 

Loves getting the two of you matching sets of grillz. Gold, silver, diamond studded. It doesn't matter

Brings you alongside her for all of her council meetings as she truly values your opinion and wants you to be involved and know your role in leading the nation with her

Has a throne for you next to hers 

Trains you with the Dora because she doesn’t want what happened last time with Namor to ever repeat itself

Buys you whatever you want right off each and every runway during all the major Fashion Week shows

Always get the biggest section when y’all got out and you betta be shaking that ass cause she gon be throwing them bills babyyyy

The amount of decorated hotel rooms you get from her is ridiculoussss. She’ll decorate a whole hotel for you just because she loved seeing your smile in the morning.

Always has her hand in yours no matter what the two of you are doing. Even hold your hand while you two brush your teeth

Never breaks eye contact with you while the two of you are speaking

Has more that 100 nicknames for you

Toxic/Angsty 

Purposely starts arguments with you because it turns her on to see you riled up and she can’t stop thinking about you putting her back in her place

Used a bit too much of her strength on you during training and you had to stay in the hospital for a few nights. She locked herself in her room and couldn’t even stand to look at you when you were released. 

Sometimes she lacks empathy because she believes she’s gone through the worse shit. She definitely gaslights you sometimes and walks away if you complain to her about having family issues

“Wow. It’s so sad you argue with your mom everyday. Where’s mine? Oh yea right. I’m done listening”

Tries to deny that she felt anything for RiRi but will constantly talk about how beautiful she is just to get you jealous. You end up beating her ass bc wtf

One of those lesbians that doesn't like when you talk to other women bc why the fuck would you?

Will look you dead in the eyes and tell you that you aren’t more important than her work and you should just leave her alone and spend the money she gives you. She sent 2 mil to your account while you stormed out of the lab

She’ll deny you sex because she didn’t like the way you spoke to the Dora earlier that morning. You said hi 

She sometimes embarrassed by the lack of strength you have. Like tighten up tf

“Can you stop touching me? Even the Dora don’t smother me this much.”

Hates when you constantly run your hands through her hair like she didn’t just get it done

Kisses her teeth when you try to shake your ass and it doesn’t move the way she want it too

“Try harder maybe? Ugh just stop actually. You look cringe doing that” LIKE WHERE'S YOUR ASS MA'AM????

Smut

Shuri likes when you eat her pussy with her panther suit on. Yes. That part is cut out 

She has different grillz for eating your pussy and then ones for eating you ass— SHE A BOTTOMFEEDAAAA

Shuri loves pressing her kimoyo beads against your clit and sending intense vibrations there. Rose toy who???

She eats your pussy at night sometimes because if you look hard enough while she’s making your head spin, her inner bottom lip glows softly with her vibranium tattoo, being the only source of light in the room

LOVES WHEN YOU DRILL HER SHIT TO THE POINT THAT SHE CANT BREATHE AND TRIES TO GRASP AROUND BUT SHE CANT BC THE VIBRANIUM CUFFS TOO STRONG EVEN FOR HER SO SHE HAS TO BEG YOU TO RELEASE HER EVEN THOUGH SHE KNOWS YOU WON’T AHHH

Can literally eat you out for hours and against your (consented) will, she definitely does

RIDES YOU IN THE NASTIEST SLOPPIEST WAY LIKE SHE LOVES SEEING YALL CREAM MIX AND IS OBSESSED WITH HOW STICKY SHE IS AND HOW MUCH STICKIER YOU ARE UGH SHE PRESSES HER LIPS AGAINST YOUR AS IF SHE CAN GO INSIDE YOU BYEEEEEEE

SHE AINT NO FAKE GAY NO MA’AM

Wakes you up most mornings with her lips sucking and teasing your breast bc babe she can’t get enough

BOTTOM!SHURI LOVES WHEN YOU SIT ON THE THRONE AND SHE TRIES TO MAKE HERSELF CUM OVER AND OVER RIDING YOUR THIGH WHILE YOU SIT ON HER THRONE OH WOW

SHE WHINES SO MUCH AND IS NOT QUIET AT ALL. Constantly getting complaints from everyone in the palace

Likes getting her ass devoured. SORRY NOT SORRY 

Kissing you alone get her wetter than river Niger omgggg (I’m African and this how we say it PLS)

Constantly talking you through EVERYTHING she does to you

“You take my fingers so well”

“Hmm, you know I love when you squeeze around me like that. Fuck, do that again.” (THE WAY SHE ROLLS HER R’S UGHHH)

“Please, I can’t take it. I-I… Fuck you feel so good. Don’t stop fucking me, put me in my place”

Never breaks eye contact with you when she’s drilling the shit out of you 

LOVES WHEN YOU FUCK HER FACE WITH ALL THE STRAPS SHES MADE IN THE LAB

Literally she’ll be in the lab with her goggles on with all her tools scattered all of the table and gets wet picturing you standing over her and using her mouth like a toy OMG

Loves when you tie her up with pink and purple ribbons and stuff her mouth with your panties BYE

LIKES BEING BLINDFOLDED AND WEARING FLUFFY EARMUFFS SO YOU CAN DO ABSOLUTELY ANYTHING TO HER AND GIVING YOU FULL CONTROL

WHITE FLUFFY EARMUFFS WITH PINK RIBBONS AND HER CURLY HAIR SHAKING AROUND EVERY TIME SHE MOVES

[booksandpaperss]

god catradora is so good it’s SO GOOD and I fall in love with it every time I rewatch spop. i will Never understand their haters it’s genuinely one of my favorite ships to ever ship, they have everything that makes a romance good idc. people will write aus of their faves with a fanon dynamic that catradora already has in the show (I’ve seen this. childhood best friends to enemies to lovers is where it’s at fr) bc it’s just that good. catradora haters I feel sad for you. cant enjoy an amazing sapphic ship bc catra is “too toxic” for u to handle (this is a magical princess show). it’s so good I almost can’t believe we have it. oh what a great day it is to be a lesbian 🙏

[rinstrumental]

ellie gf headcanons pt. 2

# i’m a headcanon machine i cant be stopped… also she is literally a cheesy ass lose girlfriend this part is actually canon confirmed by naughty dog. modern au

if your native language isn’t english/speak any language other than english she is going to think you’re ten times cooler than you already are. best believe she’s hopping on duolingo first thing she gets home too so she can impress you (i know duolingo isn’t the best but she’s TRYING)

she took spanish in high school though

even though she can’t retain the info for shit she will search up terms of endearment in your language and call you them all the time even if you think its corny she can’t stop

whenever someone asks her what her type is she just says “my girl” with the most stupid grin on her face

she fidgets SO much omg she doesn’t wear rings often but when she does (you said they looked nice one time and all of a sudden she’s wearing rings every time you see her) she’s constantly playing with them. she also plays with the strings of her hoodie/loose threads etc.

*playing basketball* “this one’s for you babe” *completely misses*

such a nerd for collectibles!! has been since she was a kid. she has funko pops, vinyls, pokemon cards, snowglobes, plushies, smiskis, calico critters she’s a slave to capitalism

little social media presence. her only instagram account is basically a photo dump which is private with only her closest friends following it. (spoiler alert, most of the pictures are of the two of you)

in the last post i said she’s have a pet gecko but i also strongly believe joel would have a dog. could be a teeny tiny chihuahua or a fucking great dane idk just give my man a good friend! ellie also loves that dog (whatever it is) dearly

doesn’t have any piercings and doesn’t ever consider it unless you say that they’d look good on her… your word is her law FR 😭😭😂😂

okay no she’s not dependent on you to the point of it being toxic though. HOWEVER it’s a bit hard for her to express when she feels upset sometimes and gets jealous easily but she tries her best to communicate and keep it healthy

she has her tattoos though of course. although this is a modern au so she’d have different ones i guess… forearm one is definitely in the cards but also lots of tiny little ones. a few for her friends and family and a few she got in a drunken stupor

pottery lesbian that’s it

gets SOOO red when she’s drunk i dont care what anyone says her alcohol tolerance is average at best

i think she would play a sport sometimes. like volleyball. she plays competitively if she’s in school and she always wants you to come “watch your girlfriend be cool”. bring a sign - she’ll love it

kisses and hugs u after the game while she’s all sweaty too…ew but aw

she also really likes animated movies, not disney but like how to train your dragon and the spiderverse and puss in boots (im projecting). she went to see barbie and oppenheimer on the same day and she didn’t dress up but the spirit was there!!

she’s not a gymbro per se but joel probably would have workout equipment in the basement which ellie uses from time to time. and she’s just naturally lean because she’s an active person. pls tell her how big and strong and sexy and amazing she is

ok fine i think she likes being praised AND SHE DESERVES ITT like she’s such a wonderful girlfriend ❤️ ugh shes perfect I CANT STAND HER

goodnight and good morning texts are part of her routine

sunburns easily so you have to remind her to wear sunscreen all the time

doesn’t really know how to do makeup but she’ll paint your nails for you and do your hair

whenever the two of you spend the night together she’s usually last to get up. this bitch could sleep through the rapture i’m not kidding but it’s okay because it gives you time to admire her pretty face as she sleeps in peace and quiet for once

takes the aux very seriously you guys HAVE to share it. unless you like the same music and i think she would like radiohead, joy division, deftones and loser sad songs like that…. she also is a big fan of the spiderverse soundtrack and kendrick lamar though and thee stallion 😜 (i have two wolves inside me)

please reblog mwah thank you!!

[rainbowstargazerlilies]

Mechs Ships Tournament: Resurrection Round Part 2!

Hi! The winner of this poll will proceed into the final poll to face off against the other Resurrection Round poll winner, Polymechs And Lyf, and the HNOC trio. This will only run for one day. Hope you all are ready!

Link to the other poll here

Propaganda under cut:

Tim/Bertie:

The entire “Tim Goes Mad” section of GTVTMK. Tim looses it because his best friend dies and goes on a murderous rampage. Also that one art that Reegis made of the younger version of the two of them. 

gay moon bitches fr

Gptvstmk

*blows up the moon for you*

#TimBertie are literally so stuckycoded ngl#ITS ABOUT THE DEVOTION ABOUT CHILDHOOD FRIENDS GONE TO WAR ITS ABOUT THE VIOLENCE OF TRAGIC LOSS#ITS ABOUT GRIEF AND THE WAY IT HURTS YOU SO YOU EXTERNALIZE THAT HURT TO THE ONES WHO TOOK YOUR LOVED ONE#HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT MOON KAISER IM PISSING ON THE MOON YOU IDIOT!!!#im normal about timbertie (tags via @watermelonselfship)

Carmilla/Odin:

Lesbiabs

Because. Unethical lesbians who should be in sickly sweet love is not appreciated enough.

FUCKED UP TOXIC MILF YURI!!!!!!!

kinda bonkers women

TOXIC MILF YURI!!!!

Violinspector:

https://archiveofourown.org/works/37936555/chapters/94742191

violinspector (the stars claim them)

The Stars Claim 'Em 

yoyr fanfic idk i thought this was funny [Poll runner's note: I'm the author of The Stars Claim Them.]

it slaps. that’s all

no thoughts. only them.

Ashes/Jonny:

bc like... the vibes. i also like ashes as hades and jonny as cerberus. ashes is so cool, and jonny is so... jonny. 

their backstories both end with them murdering their father figure and then literally burning all of their ties to their former homes. its narratively satisfying. of course theyd be together.

#ASHES/JONNY MY EVERYTHING#good lord okay#they're best firneds. they were there for eachother since the beginning#jonny's a freak and ahses has to deal with jonny's bullshit & is also really the only one who knows how to put up with her bullshit#they're so awful but they really truly care so much about eachother#they're smoking buddies#ashes & jonny taking a moment and sitting together for a few minutes without saying a word#smoke break#they just Understand eachother do you feel me. they just Get eachother please (tags via @dropitdoeeyes)

Ivy/Raphaella

them <333 science vibe lesbians. Pedantic archivist and sciency scientist. Must I say more??? 

science saphics + ivy infodumping while raph does science™ is awesome

https://archiveofourown.org/works/41629023/chapters/104419359 :3

they could be called research paper which is based so vote them

no heart of gold, just flesh and blood - quantumducky - The Mechanisms (Band) [Archive of Our Own](Fic contains gore and some sexual content. It's about a vivisection :3) (via @mothocean)

#ivy raphaella sweep!!!#do it for the nerds! do it for the girls! do it for the nerdy girls!!#aa (tags via @jewishdainix)

Brian/Galahad:

i think they would kissies

Galahad sat on a murder chair because Brian said to. (via @bookworm-girl2002)

[roseworth]

hey <3 heres what i think of every scene that rosenberg has written with rose

disclaimer: most of this is me being very nitpicky. rose was a side character for all of these appearances so obv i understand that its not gonna be perfect characterization. but i rly like talking about rose characterization so this is just me pulling apart her appearances for fun <3

ok lets go

overall

i LOVE the jason & rose dynamic. im not much of a jayrose fan but since its happening im glad that its like this. i love that its so much "rose is excessively horny and jason is giving her nothing" bc its so in character for both of them. shes fucking with him and he does not know how to reciprocate. they r so sillies

HOWEVER. rose would not just hang around him like shes doing. as much as i like that dynamic i feel like he also has to at least sometimes show that hes. you know. interested in having her around. shes just kinda tagging along and i wish there was a reason why she would put up with him never giving her anything, especially since she has a tendency to leave at the first sign of not being wanted

on a completely different note, im a little disappointed that shes wearing her old costume instead of the new one she has in btbatb/kt ravager. i appreciate that shes still drawn like an adult but i rly like her new costume so im sad that she doesnt have it

man who stopped laughing #9

STRONG start. beats up a bunch of cops, then right after she appears she does her stupid flirting thing then immediately says that she doesnt want to associate with the batfamily. queen.

not to mention right before this is my fav failgirl moment where she goes through her whole plan to crash the car and break jason out of prison. then just goes up and knocks on the door

flips the car over then walks up and says "hey its the fire department. open up" and not a single person believes her. i love her

lesbian rose crumbs <3 i still choose to believe shes talking about cass here idc. shes so silly and this was a cute lil panel

so yeah. she was on one page of this issue but that one page was great and i love her

mwsl #10

shes so lame <3 i talked about this moment a lot when this issue first released but i love it. "somebody had all the fun without us" upon finding a body, then realizing someone else was there and just. starts shooting. she doesnt hit anything. she doesnt even know where the other person is.

my big problem here is that she does not carry a gun and pretty much never uses guns. honestly now that im thinking about it this is one of the only times shes ever used a gun on panel (the other times i can think of being: shooting wade off a cliff after her mom died, shooting starfire in n52 outlaws (but new 52 rose barely even counts as rose), and using deathstroke's gun when she was pretending to be him in deathstroke 2016)

shes not anti-gun or anything but it still bothers me just a little that suddenly she has a gun (hence why i fully believe she stole jasons gun <3)

if i want to nitpick, kate should not have been able to hit her. rose should've seen she was coming wayyy before (bc precog) and she wouldnt be knocked down from one hit. i fear we are headed down a path of her becoming jasons incompetent girlfriend but i wont be too dramatic about her getting hit one (1) time

but other than that i thought this was a fun moment of rose getting hit then jason immediately fighting the person that hit her. toxic girlbesties fr

then also her needing to be held back after she gets up so she doesnt start attacking the person thats helping them <3 i love her

mwsl #11

this is a nice issue for her just because in true rose tradition she LOVES to have homoerotic fights with every other female character she interacts with. the kate & rose dynamic was soooo fun i love it when shes mean to people for no reason <3

i did not like this part though. i feel like there are a lot of implications about rose here that are unfair to her character & her place in the dcu. i'll meet the book on its own terms and say that we're only talking about post-52 rose (blah blah everything's canon rn but this book is very clearly not using pre-52 rose lore) but even then? theres no real reason for her to be ducking superheroes or for superheroes to keep an eye on her. shes not a villain or even much of a killer, the fact that shes "staying off the radars" of good guys doesnt make much sense. and the fact that kate knows her and "studies" her (fellas is it gay to study another woman despite never meeting her) implies that rose is like. a threat. shes just kind of around there is no reason kate should know her like that

cute moment! but also it bothers me. i think its fun that she refused to go since its not her fight and she doesnt want to get into a joker mess. HOWEVER. when has she ever in her life passed up an opportunity to get involved in someone elses problem. to me she wouldnt have even delivered the list of addresses without a fight if she wasnt gonna go along

other than her using a gun again (where the hell did she even get that) i like this <3 her showing up and saving manhunter after she said she didnt care what happened is so her. also i just like the fact that she shot joker

gay gay homosexual gay

the rest of this issue is fun <3 just kate & rose fighting together then getting blown up together <3 this was a nice issue for her despite the problems i had with it

gotham war red hood #2

gotham war break!!!

okay first of all i LOVE that he took her along. there was no reason for rose to be here but jason was told to meet someone and said "ok ill go but my weird friend comes with me" its so funny

ive seen a lot of people complain about the "you're my only friend" line but i LOVE it. not necessarily because she doesnt have any friends but because she would not in a million years ADMIT that she has friends. she would rather be shot in the head than say that she actually likes the people that she hangs out with.

but to be fair.... she also doesnt have friends. "what about the lazarus island gang?" the only person she actually liked there and showed any friendship toward was damian, and they ARE friends but she considers him more of a little brother than a friend. "what about the teen titans??" a) she would NEVER admit that she is friends with any of them b) its technically.... not really canon that she was ever on the same team as them. like i said before, im meeting this book on its terms, and rose being a teen titan hasnt been mentioned since flashpoint :( i wont go on a whole tangent about her friends but given that she hasnt really made a friend in years and never talks to anyone else, i think its fair for her to say that she has no friends

so yeah all this to say: she has friends, but it is 100% in character for her to say that she has no friends. i stand by this line

i dont have much to say here i just think shes so cute <3 i also love the fact that jason jumped straight to "rose is robbing a dead person" instead of "rose is inspecting the body"

but im OBSESSED with the fact that she DOES rob him. i feel like we're not talking about this enough. she saw a dead body and took his money. im not even mad about it because its so fucking funny to me

im sorry jay/rose fans this makes me want to vomit. this feels too "earnest emotions" for both of them. the rest of this scene was fine but this panel specifically feels so :/

"i just need help" "always" and "please take care of yourself" and "meet at our spot" "promise?" "i promise" does not feel like them at all. its a very sweet and genuine moment but they would NOT have sweet and genuine moments! neither of them would ever express their feelings and they would not have this conversation

this does not feel like rose at all idk who this is. where is the rage!!!!!! where is the anger!!!!!!! why did she stand there for hours just. worried about him. why isnt she lashing out

comparing this to the scene in tt03 where she's worried about eddie:

she gets angry! shes worried about him and starts yelling at everyone around her because hes hurt and she doesnt know whats happening. i would have LOVED this energy in this book and its sooooo disappointing that she just. stands there like 🥺 when she doesnt know what happened to jason

mwsl #12

i rly liked this part fhdkjfhakjdfd i thought her pretending to be him just to get batman out of the way was so good and so real. shes helping out AND fucking with batman

very minor complaint here but this isnt even true . she DOES try to run into him in ds16 when slade kidnaps damian and rose gives bruce the ransom terms. also i feel like this line is vaguely implying that she HAS found him (/he found her) on accident before which is also not true given that their only interactions are in ds16 and being in the same general area in shadow war. and also reiterating that shes not a villain so batman has no reason to track her down or cause problems for her but. whatever. this is entirely just me jumping to conclusions about what this one throwaway line means and then getting mad about it

LOVE this. she inserted herself into the situation then complains about it. this isnt her business and shes making sure that jason knows it. but also she completely volunteered for most of this

BOOOOOOOO she would not fucking say that. "sorry about that whole chase" no she would not apologize. "please dont kick my ass" she would NOT say that!!!!! first of all given that this is after gotham war she would probably kick his ass just for what he did to jason. even besides that she would not be afraid of him even a little. comparing their convo in ds16 #5 to this is so sad bc </3 why is she afraid of him instead of being a huge bitch and yelling at him

this ending is really good for her though. she absolutely would dive into the water with joker gas, trash, and dead bodies just to save her friend <3

this is more like it!!!!!!!! shes worried for him and takes initiative to save him by jumping in the water despite it being a very dangerous decision and then insults him while she saves his life <3333 its a tiny bit more of her being mean to express worry which is nice <3 its not perfect but its closer

in conclusion: there are many good moments. there are many parts i like about it. but there are just so many things that dont feel like rose </3 most of the broad strokes are there but it just doesnt feel like her when shes not full of rage and going out of her way to piss people off

[creatuesfromthedeep]

She covers her plate with the blood of the saints Though her sanguine she knows will not quell Her longing to blister, burn all who resist her Dragging them down, down, down to her hell

Her kingdom comes On the backs of the ones she once loved So why, oh, why don't you run?

Fallen - Dirt Poor Robins

Niranye

[transgenderturnip]

time for a meduka meguca otp choice "what it says about you" style roast!

homura and madoka:

basically canon. toxic Yuri staple food. you were weirdgirl aligned at some point, are a weirdgirl, or you really like squishmallows. probably have been on psych meds I'M JUST SAYINGGGG!!! WHY'S EVERYBODY MAD I'M JUST SAYI-

Sayaka and Kyoko:

good taste. question how's your relationship with your parents answer quickly. you like mcr don't you. did you go through a stereotypical weeb phase. don't lie to me have you said kawaii in English conversation. you buy pocky or have bought pocky fairly regularly huh. do you play rhythm games?? you sick fuck???

madoka and Sayaka:

you're so stable while also being a pmmm fan it grosses me out. how does it feel? do you want an anime lesbianism award? get out of my face. you have impeccable taste. you probably have friends, freak. have fun kissing them or whatever (not jealous voice)

Mami and homura:

you like your enemies to lovers as violent as possible huh? I like your taste in drama. homura probably thought about it too. this is telenovela levels of anime girl otp choice. when did you develop a mommy kink? or are you the one who owns fishnets and platform boots. you don't have to pay for hot topic black lipstick it's not good. take my hand. we can go to CVS. we can even go to Sephora.

madoka and Mami:

oh you're a real Yuri fan. you kind of scare me. power couple tbh. they would have been so good in a different less tragic genre. what's your favorite otome game answer quickly I know you have one. did you watch/read nana? or was it magical girl utena that did this to you. you know how to read tarot cards I can smell it.

Sayaka and Mami:

go see a therapist. I love you but you have to talk to someone. you understand the character arcs right? jeez are you okay? do you need a hug? it's gonna be okay. you don't have to be perfect.

kyoko and homura:

holy fuck you're based. so when did you start your gender journey? how many tattoos and/or piercings do you have? do you have a skateboard you don't use or a guitar you don't use I know you have one.

hitomi and Sayaka and/or madoka:

what did they do to you at gay camp. like you're right but why did you choose this. I hope you're doing well. reclaim that cross baby. remember not to bootlick the rich even if they're pretty. you just want everyone to be happy though, and I respect that.

Mami and Kyoko:

you confuse me. but I respect it. I want to dissect your mind. I can't even picture this pairing but they're my two favorite characters. the manga? ... girl go outside.

junko and saotome:

×[I can't find an image of them at the bar, which is an international tragedy. That's fine though I was running out of pictures I can put on this post.]×

you're just based. you're hilarious witty charming and have a huge weenor. however how does it feel to have just picked side character aged up madoka x Sayaka. you need an insane woman bad huh. do you identify as a meow meow? you should make me sick, but I want to hang out with you. good choice.

SPEED ROUND!!; the STRAIGHTS

Sayaka and kyosuke: alright hetero Jessica how did you get here? how's being a cuck for mickey mouse going? don't lie to me I know you're a Disney freak. what happened here? how are you still that into Hamilton at this point?

kyosuke and hitomi: no it isn't. you are lying.

junko and madoka 's dad (I'm not looking up his name he's madoka's dad fr): I have no roast for you. you're right. they're beautiful. you just didn't want to admit your choice is actually madohomu because it's basic sounding though huh

BONUS ROUND

anyone involving magia record: please consume less madoka media. I say this as a freak myself. go outside, I'm begging you. this is worse than reading the manga. you probably did that too. it's okay. take my hand. we can look at the flowers.

anything involving kyubey: one, stop lying. this is less funny than hitomi and kyosuke. two, seek help... okay if it's homura it's a little funny.

anything involving Charlotte / Bebe / Nagisa: go to jail.