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the-most-humble-blog · 1 month ago
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🧟‍♂️ HATE TO BURST YOUR ZOMBIE-HORDING BUBBLE (But in real life? Y’all wouldn’t be fighting zombies. You’d be laughing while smoking ‘em.)
I know. You’ve got it all planned out. Your Zombieland fantasy. Your Walking Dead cosplay lifestyle. You think when it all goes to hell, you'll become Daryl Dixon overnight with a crossbow, fingerless gloves, and a stone-cold thousand-yard stare while a horde of the undead moans outside your fortified Bass Pro Shop.
You think the power grid collapses, the government falls, and you're out here eating canned beans off a bayonet while fighting off literal corpses in a trench coat made of riot gear.
Sounds cute.
But here’s the truth: Real humans? Are good at killing. Like, insanely good at killing.
If zombies were real?
They wouldn't overrun us. We'd annihilate them so fast it’d make a wildlife conservationist cry.
🔪 REALITY CHECK #1: HUMANS ARE SERIAL KILLERS WITH A CONSCIENCE We’ve survived wolves, tigers, plagues, warlords, each other, and countless extinction events.
We built religions, bombs, and air fryers. We survived the Ice Age without pants. You think a moaning meth-head with half a jaw is going to end civilization?
Please.
If anything, humans would treat zombies like pests.
Neighborhood watch groups would turn into hunting parties. Suburbs would form kill leagues. TikTok would be flooded with #ZombTok tutorials for machete sharpening and viral trends like “How I cleared my HOA of 47 rotters in under 2 minutes.”
🔫 REALITY CHECK #2: MODERN MILITARY + 72 HOURS = GENOCIDE Let’s do the math.
Even at modest mobilization, the U.S. military has:
1.2 million active-duty troops
393 million civilian-owned firearms
6,500+ main battle tanks
Drones that can see your heat signature from space
And bunker-crushing MOABs that can turn an entire infected city block into glass.
You're telling me slow, unarmed, rotting pedestrians are going to outmaneuver trained sociopaths with night vision and air support?
Zombies wouldn’t even make it to Day 4.
🧠 REALITY CHECK #3: ZOMBIES HAVE SHIT TACTICS Let’s break down zombie strategy:
Moan
Walk toward sound
Bite if lucky
That’s it.
No stealth. No camouflage. No coordinated attacks. Just moist gurgling in traffic.
In real life, they’d be sniped, burned, tased, trapped, dumped into pits, run over, and exploited for sport within the first 48 hours.
We’d have entire YouTube channels dedicated to zombie obliteration ASMR. Merch drops. Fan cams. Season passes.
They wouldn't be "winning." They’d be streamed in 4K and monetized to death.
🏹 REALITY CHECK #4: REDNECKS, MILITIA DADS, AND DIY PSYCHOS WOULD GET BORED Every town’s got at least one guy who owns 19 guns “for raccoons,” built a bunker “just in case,” and jerks off to Joe Rogan podcasts.
You really think he’s not ready?
That dude would have the entire county cleared by breakfast and still be asking:
“So uh… when does the real war start?”
And don’t even get me started on rural communities. They’d treat the apocalypse like a church barbecue with kill scores.
🧬 OBSCURE, HORRIFYINGLY TRUE FACTS:
Genghis Khan’s forces wiped out 11% of the global population with horses, bows, and zero antibiotics.
Ants have been known to build bridges out of their dead. Humans? We built civilizations out of stacked skulls.
The average human has enough jaw strength to bite off a finger— but won’t, because society told us not to. Take away the rules? You think we won't bite back?
☣️ THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE YOU ENVISION = THE SHORTEST MASSACRE IN HISTORY Zombies wouldn’t last long enough for a plot twist. They’d be rounded up like cattle, studied, and pit-fought for betting apps.
There’d be sponsorship deals. Limited-edition zombie sneakers. Fashion lines called “Rot Couture.”
Half of Hollywood would star in zombie hunting reality shows before the midterms. Netflix would greenlight 13 documentaries and a prequel drama.
You’d be scrolling Twitter in a recliner while the last pack of infected gets bulldozed by a retired oil tycoon on Twitch.
🩸 SO WHY DO WE LOVE ZOMBIES? Because they give us permission to fantasize about clean violence. No guilt. No consequences. Just mowing down monsters that used to be your boss.
But in real life? You wouldn't be scared. You’d be desensitized by lunch.
The real horror isn't the undead. It's how efficient we are at erasing them.
🧃 TL;DR?
You want a zombie apocalypse because deep down, you want an excuse to unleash the part of yourself society made you leash.
But sorry to burst your fantasy: it wouldn’t be survival. It would be slaughter.
And humans? We’d be too good at it.
So good that by Week Two, we’d be lobbying Congress to put zombies on an endangered species list.
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📦 This post—and other brutal truth payloads—will join the vault soon. Because some fantasies need to be corrected with statistical violence and sociological fire.
The Patreon archive awaits. You're welcome.
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schizo-bbgs · 1 year ago
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How did you study about military gear? I'm currently trying & searching sources and looking for some tips.
I really like your work btw. Keep going✨️
Hi! Thank you so much, I'm excited to share some knowledge with someone. <3 I tried summing up methods that have helped me the most: 1. lots of research (vids, blogs, magazines, loadout lists,...) 2. store/product photos 3. military photos (not airsoft!) 4. damtoy loadout showcase vids I first started off with doing extensive research on cod operators. Cosplay guides by shadeops21 (DeviantArt) are a huge help with the most accurate loadout lists.
Next step was looking up product photos & studying the functions, shapes, different angles. Store/product photos are my most used refs, they're in high resolution & you'll see every detail thanks to a well lit environment. I also collect military pics in one huge folder, not only for pose refs & inspo, but also as refs on how the gear is used. Product photos will lay flat, worn gear will always look different!
Make sure to learn how to differentiate airsoft from real military pics, airsofters (except for dedicated reenactors/milsimers) tend to have wacky tastes (ugly, black amazon gear and fake, glowing NVGs,...).
The gear of Damtoys is incredibly accurate & precise, watching videos of the dolls being dressed will also give you an idea on how accs (pouches, glow sticks, radio systems, ...) are attached to the equipment.
My strongest interests lay in SOF, so I'll also collect magazines with expert info, insights & loadout descriptions (K-ISOM (German) SPECIAL OPS (Polish)). To my advantage, I do have friends who are either huge military nerds or in active duty, I'll sometimes ask them questions and learn about the features and (dis)advantages of various pieces of gear. It's a life hack, but you'll achieve your goal either way if you're determined!
After you got a feel for the basics, you can start accommodating knowledge. Study drawing/recognizing the most used equipment first, western modern kits are very repetitive (as the products are so good, they don't need to be replaced). Headsets: 3M Peltor ComTac, Sordin, Ops-Core AMP Helmets: Ops-Core, Crye AirFrame, Team Wendy, MICH 2000 Plate carriers: Crye JPC, Crye AVS, First Spear, Lindnerhof, AGILITE, LBT Slick & 6094 Gloves: Oakleys, PIG FDT Alpha, Mechanix, Petzl, Nomex flight gloves, Outdoor Research Ironsight After that you can start looking up more niche or less iconic brands and gear, you'll be a nerd in no time. I hope this is helpful and I'm sorry for the late reply. If you ever need help or info on something, feel free to dm me on Twitter or Tumblr!
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shiominato · 2 months ago
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THERES 56 TUTORIALS????????
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haplogamingchef · 19 days ago
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Mastering Ironeye: The Ultimate Elden Ring Nightreign Guide
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Introduction
Welcome to your all-in-one guide for mastering Ironeye in Elden Ring: Nightreign. If you're looking for a powerful support class that also brings serious ranged damage to the table, Ironeye is the way to go. In this detailed breakdown, you'll learn exactly how to make the most of Ironeye’s abilities—from optimal weapon use to positioning, team synergy, and boss fight tactics. Whether you're brand new to the game or refining your build, this Nightreign Ironeye guide covers everything you need to start dominating as the best support class in Elden Ring.
We’ll go over ability mechanics, gear selection, upgrade routes, and real-time combat strategies to help you maximize your impact across PvE scenarios.
Understanding Ironeye’s Strengths and Role in Your Team
Ironeye in Elden Ring: Nightreign is best defined as a ranged support class. This character shines by combining damage output with team protection. The marked ability is at the heart of Ironeye's utility—it not only revives allies quickly but also increases the enemy's vulnerability, making them take 10% more damage and suffer heavier stagger buildup.
Key strengths include:
Excellent at interrupting boss mechanics (like sleep attacks).
Effective in kiting fast-moving enemies and flyers.
Allows your frontline to focus on aggro while you control spacing and crowd pressure.
Reliable at keeping stagger pressure on enemies, especially bosses.
The gameplay loop is simple but powerful: maintain your distance, mark enemies strategically, and punish mistakes with burst damage.
Core Combat Mechanics and Movement Mastery
Getting the basics right with Ironeye is critical. The key to staying alive and doing consistent damage lies in movement and attack precision. Here’s a breakdown of essential controls and techniques:
Two-Handing Your Bow: Use Y + RB or Triangle + R1 to enter two-hand mode. This boosts your damage and allows for quicker shot cycles.
Aiming and Shooting: LT to aim, RT to fire. You'll get more accuracy and flexibility, especially in mid- to long-range duels.
Jump-Back Shot: Dodge (B or Circle) + RT triggers a backstep attack. This move lets you maintain space while still dealing damage.
Triple Shot Sprint: Sprint forward and press RT to unleash three arrows. Use this to apply pressure or chase down weakened targets.
Skill Activation: With two-handing active, use RT again to activate your weapon skill or enchantment, if available.
Pro Tip: The charged ultimate (Y + RT) can pierce through multiple enemies. Holding the input lets you aim—ideal for lining up shots in boss fights or clustered mobs.
Weapon Selection and Upgrade Strategy for Ironeye
Success with Ironeye depends heavily on your weapon choices. While any bow works early on, certain options provide significant boosts depending on your target’s weaknesses.
Early Game Tips:
Find Element-Specific Bows – If you’re up against a lightning-weak boss, prioritize finding a lightning-infused bow.
Rare/Blue Weapons Are Worthwhile – Even if they don’t match your damage type perfectly, rare weapons can be upgraded further and faster.
Smithing Stones – Aim to collect Smithing Stone [2] by Day Two, especially from mines. These are key to boosting damage for mid-game fights.
Recommended Approach:
Search early areas for churches and bosses.
Loot based on enemy weaknesses (ping areas where a lightning, fire, or holy element can give you an edge).
Don’t forget to visit your Grace points frequently for upgrades.
Top Tip: Always have a secondary ranged option (like a wand or elemental bow) to exploit boss weaknesses.
Using Ironeye’s Marked Ability Effectively
The Marked Ability is what separates Ironeye from basic ranged characters. Not only is it a dash (comparable to Bloodhound Step), but it sets enemies up for team combos.
Benefits of Marking:
Targets take +10% damage from all sources.
Significantly increases stagger susceptibility.
Helps tanks and melee DPS secure staggers or criticals faster.
When to Use It:
Dash into an enemy and apply the mark before a team burst.
Use on fast or aerial targets to control the flow of the fight.
Apply during boss attack wind-ups—this allows your team to get a major damage spike while they’re exposed.
Stack Pressure: Keep hitting marked targets to prevent stagger bars from resetting. This is crucial in prolonged boss encounters.
Exploration and Day-One Priorities
Getting started right on Day One sets the tone for your entire run as Ironeye. Your goal early on should be to secure key upgrades and elemental gear to align with upcoming boss weaknesses.
What to Focus On:
Target Elemental Weaknesses – If you know a boss is weak to lightning, explore zones with lightning weapons.
Search for Greases – These consumables let you coat your bow with elemental effects for added power.
Secure Healing and Buff Items – These items become especially important since Ironeye has low health scaling.
Do Not Overcommit Early: Mines are great for Smithing Stones but avoid deep exploration until Day Two unless you're well-equipped. Save major grinding for later when your gear and stats catch up.
Key Locations to Prioritize:
Churches for buffs.
Mines (light exploration only).
Areas with rare item drops (blue-tier bows or greases).
Day Two Strategy: Upgrades and Evergaol Runs
Day Two is where your Ironeye build really starts to scale. With access to more materials and tougher challenges, you should focus on leveling up, finding Evergaols, and refining your playstyle.
Main Goals:
Level Up Regularly – Return to Grace points often and invest in Dexterity and Mind (for faster bow use and ability usage).
Find Evergaols – These reward around 10,000 runes and often contain useful loot like rare weapons or stat-boosting relics.
Gear Synergy – Start looking for weapons or artifacts that match Ironeye’s strengths (ranged damage, mobility, stagger support).
Survivability Tips:
Prioritize dodging upgrades like improved rolls or dash boosts.
Look for Wending Grace, which lets you revive once per life—game-changing for boss fights.
Adapt Based on Elemental Zones: If you enter a lightning-heavy area, pick gear that resists or enhances that damage type.
Boss Fight Strategy and Team Synergy
Ironeye isn’t just about dealing damage—it’s about positioning, timing, and setting your team up for success. Knowing how to handle boss fights is what elevates a good Ironeye into a game-changer.
General Boss Tactics:
Stay Behind the Boss: Most enemies have frontal AoEs. Stick to the rear or sides, allowing your tank to absorb aggro.
Use Ultimate Shot to Interrupt: Your Y + RT attack can disrupt abilities like the sleep move from the Augur fight.
Track Aggro Swaps: If the boss targets you (e.g., red chest mark), kite away from your team to reduce risk.
Supporting Your Team:
Constantly mark bosses to raise team damage.
Use ranged pressure to keep stagger bars active, aiding melee teammates in triggering criticals.
When a teammate is down, prioritize picking them up. Ironeye’s revive is one of the fastest in the game.
Avoid Overextending: Ironeye is not tanky. Don’t get greedy—stay mobile and use distance to your advantage.
Dealing with Groups and Fast Enemies
Crowd control is one of Ironeye’s hidden strengths. You’ll often find yourself facing waves of enemies or highly mobile units like flyers.
Tactics for Handling Multiple Targets:
Aim for the Weakest First: Focus down the lowest-health enemies to thin out the group.
Position High: Use terrain to get a better angle and avoid being surrounded.
Use Triple Shot Smartly: Sprint-shot (forward + RT) is ideal for groups when retreating isn't an option.
Special Cases:
Flyers and fast bosses (like Augur) are where Ironeye shines. Stay locked on, keep firing, and use dodge shots to maintain pressure.
When fighting multiple enemies, mark one to reduce group pressure and allow your team to collapse on that target faster.
Use Jump-Back Shots to escape quickly if surrounded. This move gives just enough spacing to reposition without taking a hit.
Late Game Tips and Advanced Tricks
By the late game, your Ironeye should feel like a fully realized support DPS class. At this point, maximizing your contribution depends on optimizing cooldowns, refining mark timing, and adjusting your loadout for each fight.
Late Game Focus Areas:
Elemental Swaps: Carry multiple bows or enchantments tailored to specific enemy weaknesses (e.g., Holy for Albanarox).
Critical Combos: Stack marked shots with teammate ultimates for massive burst.
Situational Magic Use: If you find yourself with underused FP, equip a wand or talisman for ranged elemental damage.
Important Reminder: Some bosses are resistant to piercing. Have a magic or elemental alternative ready to avoid being stuck in a damage drop-off.
Support Mentality Wins Games: Reviving allies, applying mark frequently, and controlling field presence is often more impactful than raw DPS.
Conclusion
Ironeye is one of the most versatile and rewarding classes in Elden Ring: Nightreign. With a mix of mobility, crowd control, and team support, this build offers a strong balance between survivability and pressure.
Whether you're pinning down flyers, keeping your team alive, or marking a boss to break its posture, playing Ironeye right means knowing when to stay back, when to mark, and when to unleash damage. Mastering these rhythms transforms you from a backline shooter to a frontline enabler.
Stick to ranged positioning, prioritize utility, and keep pressure on your enemies’ stagger bar. If you follow this guide, you’ll soon see why Ironeye is considered one of the best support roles in the game.
Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ)
Q: Is Ironeye good for beginners? A: Yes. Ironeye has straightforward mechanics and is very forgiving thanks to its ranged style and revive ability.
Q: What stats should I focus on first? A: Dexterity, Mind, and Endurance. These boost bow efficiency, ability usage, and movement.
Q: What weapon should I use? A: Look for bows that match enemy weaknesses. Elemental bows (Lightning, Holy) are especially strong.
Q: Can Ironeye deal with bosses alone? A: Yes, but it’s more effective in a team. It excels in supportive roles, softening up targets and reviving teammates.
Q: What is the best time to use the marked ability? A: Before a damage burst from your team or to interrupt dangerous boss mechanics.
Q: Is Ironeye viable in all fights? A: Mostly, yes. However, against high-resistance piercing enemies, you may need a backup magic or elemental weapon.
🎮 Meet Haplo Gaming Chef 🍳
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Specializing in: • Game-inspired recipe creation • Cooking quest guides • Power-up snacks for gaming sessions • Achievement-worthy meal prep
Join my party as we explore the delicious intersection of pixels and plates. Whether you're a casual foodie or a hardcore gamer, there's always room at my crafting table! #Gaming #GamingGuides #GamingChef #HaploGamingChef For More Visit: https://haplogamingchef.blogspot.com/
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droegeboycreations · 2 months ago
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HWBT Skirmish Tutorial (Video 10)
https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/holywar/holy-war-battlefield-tactics
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presentablemichael · 2 months ago
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Im rly liking isat but the tutorial rly fcking dragged on
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shawnthebro · 1 month ago
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Throwables are a big part of most FPS games. Let’s explore grenades, tacticals, and more!
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emeraldcreeper · 5 months ago
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Every time I have to menu+x load state then go back to the last item I felt safe in the map I’m doing in fe7, (or just before I go hmmm this is a stupid move that’ll get a unit slaughtered mercilessly, let’s see if the gambit pays off) I learn something important, like sometimes it’s the ai will go clear for whoever they can kill so move dorcas *away* from the danger instead of into, he had 6 hp and their health bars are invisible unless you move the cursor over their pixel bodies, or maybe the lesson is check the map for what the enemy units are before you say no we don’t need the monk he won’t do anything becaue there’s a magic user yeah there’s only one but he’s better than fuckin Nils the baby bitch so we need the monk here
Sometimes the lesson look at the fucking map. As in look at it. Look. At. The. Map and see how the tiles work and how to funnel your units so you don’t waste turns trying to move a non mounted character agonizingly slowly to the ballista. I’m so fucking stupid there was an impassable area by the ballista and I was like cool it’s sooo close by, I’ll just move Will near it with Dorcas (beef man) as bait so they hit him instead of the squishy archer who can sneak up and shoot him out of the ballista and steal it so we can pick the enemies off at better range. I got one of my knights killed (as I reloaded, he’s fine. Even if I didn’t he’d be okay just worse than if he hadn’t died.) because I fucked up so bad and I still haven’t learned the lesson of the enemy will snipe the fuck out of whoever they can kill next turn. At least I didn’t try to put the flying mounted unit in the kills flying units map. It’s the small things
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fogaminghub · 7 months ago
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Hey, ant warriors! 🐜✨ Ready to conquer the ‘Stealing’ mission in the Empire of the Ants game? Check out our latest blog post for all the essential tips and strategies you need to succeed! Don't miss out on expert advice to strengthen your colony! 🎮🌍
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veiledfox · 9 months ago
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} Space Marine 2 is stupid satisfyingly fun to play
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hanniesunshine · 11 months ago
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THAT’S what meta means?? Bro fucking fr 💀
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legionofmyth · 1 year ago
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Questions & Clarifications for the Palladium Megaverse TTRPG System
⚔️ Confused about the #Palladium Megaverse hand-to-hand combat rules? �� We've got you covered! Watch our video for clear answers and rule clarifications. Become an #RPG combat expert! #RPGCombat #PalladiumMegaverse #GameRules #TTPRG
Heroes Unlimited 2E Dead Reign Dive deep into the nuances of the Palladium Megaverse hand-to-hand combat system with our latest video. We address the most debated topics, clarify rules, and offer insights to enhance your gameplay in series like Rifts and Heroes Unlimited. Whether you’re resolving combat conflicts or looking to refine your understanding, this video is a treasure trove of…
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swishyrebootedyt · 2 years ago
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🎮 Welcome to our comprehensive Call of Duty: WWII walkthrough! 🎮 Immerse yourself in the epic battles of World War II as we guide you through every intense mission, strategic encounter, and heart-pounding moment of this iconic first-person shooter. Join us on this historical journey as we relive the bravery and sacrifices of soldiers during one of the most pivotal periods in human history.
🔥 In this Call of Duty: WWII gameplay series, we provide you with step-by-step guidance, tactical insights, and expert tips to conquer each mission. From storming the beaches of Normandy on D-Day to battling through war-torn European cities, we've got you covered. Get ready to experience the realism, action, and emotion of World War II like never before.
🔔 Don't forget to subscribe and hit the notification bell to stay up-to-date with each new mission in our Call of Duty: WWII walkthrough. Whether you're a seasoned veteran looking to relive the nostalgia or a new recruit diving into the series, our detailed commentary and strategic gameplay will help you navigate the challenges ahead.
📢 Join the conversation! Share your thoughts, strategies, and favorite moments in the comments below. Let's embark on this unforgettable journey together!
#CallOfDutyWWII #Walkthrough #GamingGuide #WorldWar2 #CODWW2 #Gameplay #TacticalGaming #GamingCommunity #WWIIGame #GamingWalkthrough #FirstPersonShooter #HistoricalGaming #SubscribeNow
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droegeboycreations · 3 months ago
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HWBT Skirmish Tutorial (Video 4)
https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/holywar/holy-war-battlefield-tactics
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wickworks · 3 months ago
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🦴☠️ Lancer Tactics "bones" done! ☠️🦴
The first fully public early access build for Lancer Tactics is live! We got 2 mechs per manufacturer, 2 sitreps, a handful of NPCs, and a tutorial. I'm still tweaking the new itch page, but you can get it here:
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maabelasdaruth · 5 months ago
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Bringing Solas on Blackwall's personal quest events as a shaming tactic / tutorial on how to admit to lying and war crimes and be redeemed by the Inquisitor
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