#tw: funeral

[auro-cyanide]

Today is my mum's funeral service, one week after she passed.

I can say without a shadow of doubt that her death has been the most painful thing I have ever experienced, and the most confusing.

I've gone from being a primary carer to very very suddenly being an adult whose only dependants are two cats. The way my life is going to change is going to be significant.

For the first few days I was so heartbroken I wanted to die, and now I feel so weirdly normal that I'm just waiting for the grief to swallow me whole again.

I'm going to stand in front of everyone and read my mum's eulogy when in the past I thought I would be far too distressed to ever speak.

Tomorrow I leave to head to France to have what was meant to be a respite break from caring, which is now more of a circuit breaker from everything that has happened.

I've been reading a lot about grief and it has helped, especially stories from others that had lost their mum's, or lost their loved ones through a terminal illness.

The mix of emotions and thoughts are so complex and interwoven with memories of the past that I'm sure I'll need a lifetime to get through it all.

Right now it's one day at a time.

[kimmiessimmies]

Wistfulness (23/34)

James shrugged, “I don’t know,  maybe someone else who worked for her?” He whispered back. “Also, I think mum doesn’t like us talking…”

Sarah looked at her mum, who was glaring at them.

“Sorry,” she mouthed.

“Thank you all for coming to pay your respects to our mother,” Patty spoke moments later, “There’s coffee and tea back at the house.”

[the-blind-assassin-12]

As Clear As Day

1200 words for 1200 followers #11

A/N: Hi friends! Welcome to the 12-A-Palooza! This event is my way of saying thank you for sticking with me. Your support and kindness toward me and my writing is out of this world and I’m grateful for every last one of you! This was actually the very first request that I got, and I have been sitting on it trying not to let it get too angsty... I might have dropped the ball on that one. Please don't hate me. The song chosen for this request is about a dream the singer had about her grandmother after her death, so I took that as inspiration for this piece. This is not connected to anything else I've written for Frankie and Reader and is meant to be read as stand alone.

Warnings: descriptions of a funeral, mention of death of a grandparent, fear, angst, language, nightmares

Requested by: Anonymous Song: Only If For A Night Character Choice: Frankie Morales - anon, I hope you can forgive me for this... but the song demanded it. Thank you for sending this in. <3

Summary: A terrible dream wakes you in the middle of the night and you're left to wonder if it was just that... or something darker.

Your dress is scratchy. It didn’t feel that way when you grabbed it off the rack at the store or when you tried it on in the fitting room. It’s been years since you bought it, though, and nearly as long since the last time you wore it, so maybe you’re misremembering. Maybe it’s always felt this way. Stiff. Like a canvas sack with a zipper along your spine. 

Stepping up to the food table, you stare down at the array of casseroles and salads in mismatched dishes. You recognize Lori Miller’s yellow pyrex, and you’re pretty sure that’s Mariella Garcia’s blue one next to it. Some are still wrapped with foil or covered with lids. There’s too much to be eaten all at once so they’ll  go into the freezer for the coming weeks. You’re not hungry and you can’t imagine many others are, either.

And that’s when it hits you - you’re not sure who this funeral is for. You haven’t even seen anyone yet. A pit opens in your stomach as your eyes fly around the room, searching for a face you know, heart pounding as you hope to find the one you love. But you don’t see Frankie anywhere. 

In your peripheral you spot Benny. He’s talking to Pope, both of their expressions bleak, their eyes on the brink of vacancy before Santi notices you and starts to head in your direction. Faceless strangers populate the rest of the room - apart from Will, who you can see stepping out the back door with a beer in his hand. 

Your heart slams against your ribs and your palms sweat and your goddamn dress is like sandpaper on your skin. And you still can’t find Frankie.

The walls start to spin as a wicked thought weasels its way into your brain. Maybe there’s a reason why you can’t find him. Maybe he’s - 

“Hey. C’mere.” 

Santiago reaches out and wraps you in a hug, his large hands pressing against the abrasive fabric covering your back. You hold onto him, unsure of yourself if you were to let go. 

“Santi, where’s-” 

The question never makes it past your lips. It’s replaced with a gasp as you bolt upright in the dark. 

“Frankie!” 

Chest heaving and cheeks wet, you reach for the lamp on your bedside. The walls of your bedroom come into view - deep forest green. Splotches of the paint still stain the oversized t-shirt you’re wearing in lieu of the black dress. It’s one of his and even though he’s been gone for a week, it smells like him. You clutch at it with shaking fingers, balling the worn material in your hands and letting it ground you. 

It was a dream. Not real. 

But that icy feeling doesn’t go away, even as your eyes land on the framed photo next to the lamp - the two of you at Murphy’s, Frankie’s arm around you. You had just stolen the hat right off his head to stick it on your own, leaving his curls in disarray and a laugh frozen on both of your faces. That was the first night Francisco Morales had told you that he loved you. It was the happiest you’d ever been. 

Looking at it now, in the immediate aftermath of the dream, it does little to put you at ease. You’ve had a similar dream once before, long ago.

You were nine and had never been to a funeral before, but that hadn’t stopped your brain from conjuring up details like the color and texture of the stone marking your grandmother’s grave or the way the bright green grass in the cemetery looked against the brand new fabric of your dress. You’d had that dream three days before she died and had been too afraid to tell your parents. The night she passed away she’d come to you in another dream, her voice soft and warm, not weak or brittle anymore. “Everything will be alright, sweetpea,” she’d said. “Everything will be as it should be.” 

You never had another dream like it. Until now. And you’d never told anyone about that dream. Except for Frankie. 

You take a breath and sit back against the headboard. Bringing your hands up, you run them over your hair and grab the base of your neck, trying to steady yourself. You go over the details again. 

Benny, Pope and Will were there. Tom and Frankie weren’t. You weren’t familiar enough with Tom’s ex-wife to know her casserole dishes but you noticed dishes belonging to Pope’s sister and Benny and Will’s mother. None of your own, though. And no one would expect a widow to bring food. 

A sob bubbles up at that thought and you stare down at the diamond Frankie put on your finger before leaving for Columbia. Is widow the right term if you’re not even married yet? 

You don’t fall back to sleep that night. The next two are just as restless. In the middle of the third night, your phone rings. A quick glimpse at the screen shows the call is coming from a restricted number. But it’s the time that gives you pause - the numbers read the same as they did when the nightmare had woken you up. 

“H-hello?” 

Your brain goes numb when you hear your name. In Pope’s voice. 

“Santi?” Your breath comes in gasps. “Why… why are you calling me?” 

He sighs heavily, swearing under his breath. “Fish is okay. Fuck, I’m sorry I probably scared the shit outta you.” His words are an instant balm and they let you take another breath. “Took one to the shoulder, he’s gettin’ it looked at right now. Asked me to call you, let you know he’s…”

He’s alive. He’s okay. He’s coming home to me. 

“W- what about… everyone else?” 

There’s a pause and when Pope speaks again his voice is strangled. “Tom.” He swallows and you feel a weight drop into your gut. “Tom didn’t make it.” He clears his throat. “Listen, I should go. Home soon, yeah?” 

“Yeah.” You whisper the word and the call ends. 

Another three days pass before Frankie is at your front door. There’s a shallow cut across the crest of his cheek, two steri-strips holding it shut, and his right arm is in a sling. His eyes are wide and you know he’s only seconds away from losing it as they lock with yours. You’re already there, tears flowing like rivers from your lashes to your lips. 

He steps inside and you wind your arm around his middle. For a long time it’s silent, the two of you holding one another, your hair growing damp where he rests his face against it. When he finally speaks, his words shock you. 

“I had a dream, the night I got shot.” He sighs shakily. “You came to me. Told me to come home.” His one good arm tightens around you. “Told me to fight to get back to you and-” 

That’s when he breaks and you both sink to the floor. You stroke his curls, pressing your lips wherever they land. “Shh, it’s okay, Frankie.” There’s too much to talk about but only one thing that matters. “You’re home.”

.

.

Thank you for reading! If you’d like to be added to or removed from the tag list, please feel free to let me know. You can also fill out the form on my Masterlist! :)

tags: @something-tofightfor @paracosmenthusiast@cannedsoupsucks @dihra-vesa @disgruntledspacedad @littlemisspascalwrites @alraedesigns @mishasminion360 @stevie75 @nyctophiliiiiaaa @practicalghost @tanzthompson @amb11@harriedandharassed @woodlandmouth @thescarletfang @trickstersp8 @princessxkenobi @imtryingmybeskar @wildmoonflower @mswarriorbabe80 @theredwritingwitch @silverstarsandsuns @competentpotato @pedro-pedrito-pascalito @jedi-in-crocs @hannahkatharine @anoverwhelmingdin @chiyo13 @myloveistoolittle @spishsstuff @noisynightmarepoetry

[promptful]

do you think you can provide some scenarios where characters would have to dress formally? i seem to see them same like 3 over and over again :(

Reasons to Dress Formally

absolutely love this request, anon.

WARNINGS: funeral mention.

EVENTS: 

1) To schmooze around a gala. 

2) For a birthday party.  

3) Sitting down for a high-end dinner. 

4) To impress your prom date. 

5) A dinner date. 

6) A wedding. 

7) A funeral. 

8) A gathering. 

9) For church. 

10) A fake-date. 

11) A double-date. 

12) A work promotion. 

13) An award ceremony. 

14) A coffee date. 

15) A college graduation. 

16) For one of the various ceremonies. 

17) A suit/dress fitting. 

18) Modeling for a shoot, 

19) To go out to a bar. 

20) An undercover mission. 

21) Simply to look nice. 

22) A presentation. 

23) A college reunion. 

24) Tying the knot in a courthouse. 

25) In a courtroom. 

RELATIONSHIP

26) Because your mom bullied me into Sunday brunch, and I fear her. 

27) Because we’re meeting for the first time in ten years, and I want to make a good impression on you. 

28) Because you keep stealing my clothing.

29) Because you like tying my ties. 

30) Because you say this is your favorite dress.

31) Because you say that this is your favorite outfit.

32) Because I’m meeting your family. 

33) Because you like it when I look classy. 

34) Because it's the only thing I have clean. 

35) Because it makes me feel confident. 

36) Because I need a new wardrobe, and you’re convinced that classy clothing is the way to go.

37) Because you keep giving me too expensive clothing. 

38) Because I wanted to be by your side at the wedding. 

39) Because I wanted to be by your side at the funeral. 

40) Because five years ago, you told me I looked nice dressed up/in a suit/in a dress, and we’re meeting again after all this time.   

[valeffelees]

hey, what's up! i hope today has been kind to everyone.

i haven't shared on a wipsday in a while. mostly 'cause i've been temp posting about my wips throughout the week instead, so it felt a little silly to repost all those sketches/snippets, yk? but i thought i'd come on today share a bit of the fic that currently has the most of my attention, just as a way to say hello. how's everyone been? :)

thank you kindly for tagging me today @artsyunderstudy @blackberrysummerblog @alexalexinii and @youarenevertooold, and to @stitchyqueer @larkral and @aroace-genderfluid-sheep for tagging me on sunday!

The funeral is a grim affair. “It’s not a funeral,” Jamie said. “It’s a celebration of life.” Simon doesn’t really understand the difference. He shows up wearing dark grey instead of black. It is a nice picture. Lucy Salisbury is (was) a beautiful woman. Simon finds her lovely in the unique way of little boys and their mothers; her face has the halo of a memory surrounding it. Soft, golden. Framed in curls. She did not have those curls, in the end, but they will always be a permanent part of her. Always falling over her shoulder, always tied up with green ribbon, always clinging to the curve of her brow in the rain. It is a nice picture. She is (was) so young, then. Her smile curves back from her teeth in the shape of a heart, and the summer sunlight is pink on her cheeks. A spot of light flares between her knuckles where it catches on the jewel of her wedding band as she tucks a lock of hair behind her ear. An emerald. Lucy Salisbury hated diamonds. “It’s a nice picture,” Agatha says. Simon doesn’t look at her. He wonders how long she’s been standing there. It is a nice picture. In the bottom left corner, the top of a little head is just barely poking into frame. An unruly mop of golden-brown curls. Her short, slender fingers tangled gently through them. “I guess so.” “She’s beautiful.” “Was,” Simon says. “She was.” It is a nice picture. Simon stands beneath the awning of his grandmother’s porch, an unlit cigarette hanging from the corner of his lips.  The street is a sardine can full of cars, packed bumper-to-bumper on both sides, lining the curb in stitches of dull, inoffensive colours. Grey, black, silver, brown. Damp, yellow lamplight floods the tarmac. He pats the pockets of his jacket. Then he pats the pockets of his jeans. The screen door creaks behind him. “You’ll break Ruth’s heart if she sees you,” Agatha tells him. “D’ you got a light?” She steps beside him and turns to rest the small of her back against the metal railing. Without a word, she reaches over and pulls the zipper on Simon’s jacket. Sticks her hand in and fishes out his pack of Canadian Menthol. Flips the top open. Simon’s lighter is wedged inside between his smokes. “Oh,” he says. “Thanks.” “She doesn’t like when you smoke.” “It’s—yeah, I know. I know, it’s fine. I’m leaving anyway.”

Tag, you're it! 🪄 @cutestkilla @raenestee @hushed-chorus @thewholelemon @captain-aralias @you-remind-me-of-the-babe @imagineacoolusername @ivelovedhimthroughworse @facewithoutheart @rimeswithpurple @jasonfunderberkerthefrogexists @nightimedreamersworld @shrekgogurt @prettygoododds

[elliesdeadite]

A Nightmare on Elm Street 4: The Dream Master ( 1988 ) | Director Renny Harlin

" Mind over matter? Shelia used to say that. God, every day, she changes . "

[halstudandruz]

Best of Me ~ Part 4

*Not my gif*

Pairing: Jay Halstead x Reader

Requested: Yes

Prompt: Who knew your words would come back to bite you.

Part 1 here // Part 2 here // Part 3 here

Warnings: Swearing, death, funeral, grieving

“Hey, I’m ready. Where are you guys at?” You asked Emily as soon as you heard her voice on the other line.

“We’re already at the church Jay’s supposed to be picking you up.” She answered.

“Jay’s what?” You practically whined. You had yet to answer his message from this morning and you really weren’t in the mood to deal with the questions plaguing you to start what was sure to be a terrible day off.

“Haven’t you looked at the group chat? He offered to just pick you up since he lives closer.” Sydney explained in the background.

“No, I haven’t. I’ve been too busy trying to get ahold of Luke,” you complained. Your fiancés flight supposedly landed 3 hours prior and you had yet to hear from him. All your calls went straight to voicemail, “Why wouldn’t I just go with my parents then? I bet they live closer than he does.” You rolled your eyes.

“He’s already on his way so suck it up buttercup. See you in a few.” She ended the call, putting your protests to a halt.

You glanced out your bedroom window just in time to see Jay’s truck pull against the curb. Grabbing your purse you bolted down the stairs hoping he would stay in his truck and not come to the door.

“Find Luke yet?” Your father asked just as you reached the door.

“Nope, but the girls are here so I’ll see you guys-“ A knock at the door cut your sentence short.

“Doesn’t look like the girls to me.” Your mother raised her eyebrow, a knowing look on her face as she glanced out the side window.

“They’re in the truck. See you there.” You made your way out the door pushing Jay back in the process causing him to stumble.

“No offense, but I’ve never seen anyone so eager to get to a funeral.” He joked, regaining his balance.

“Did you really have to come to the door?” You glared, stalking towards the truck.

“Excuse me, but yes. I am a gentleman.” He exhibited by making his way to the passenger side of the truck to open the door for you and help you in. “You're just scared they still like me more than their own daughter.” He teased, once he was comfortably in the driver's seat starting the engine. Your parents really did love Jay when you dated throughout high school. They weren’t the kind of people who thought high school relationships only equaled puppy love. They trusted him and really believed he would fight for you no matter what.

“Breaking their daughter's heart has the ability to sway that narrative.” You shot back and his face immediately fell, “Anyway, where is it?” You peaked into his cup holders until he reached up to open a compartment on the ceiling retrieving the diamond and holding it out to you, “Thanks.” You mumbled shakily, taking it from him to slip back on your finger. Silence drifted throughout the truck and it was deafening. You couldn’t handle it. It only gave your mind room to race. Taking it upon yourself to break it you took a deep breath, “Jay, last night..did we?” You finally asked and he looked over at you offended,

“You were drunk out of your mind. You really think that low of me? No, we didn’t.” He assured you coldly.

“I’m sorry.. it’s just I don’t really remember anything. Why was my ring at your house then?” You refused to make eye contact with him.

“Well after you took it off Emily ended up pulling you over to the jukebox to dance to some song. Being the nice guy that I am, I put it in my pocket so it didn’t go missing. I meant to lay it on your nightstand after I got you in your room, but I forgot.” He shrugged.

“Wait..you put me in bed last night?” You finally looked over at him.

“Yes, and knocked that damn end table over again. Silly of me to think your mom would’ve ever gotten rid of it.” You couldn’t help but giggle at that. Ironically, every single time you came in late throughout the years one of you accidentally knocked over the end table by the door. Now you knew she definitely placed it closer to the door purposely so she would hear you come in. “Speaking of you might want to tell your parents to put their spare key somewhere else. Keeping it in the same spot for twenty years is a safety concern.” Your heart swelled at the new information though. You shouldn’t be surprised, but knowing Jay still cared that much for you, was still concerned with your safety made you slightly emotional.

“I don’t understand how you’re functioning so well today.” You changed the subject, still reeling from your hangover.

“You do realize there’s no alcohol in water right?” A cocky smile filled his face.

“What? But I saw your beer bottles and what about the shots?” Your brows furrowed. You didn’t remember much but you knew for a fact he had done a few shots with you.

“Pays to know the owners.” He winked.

“That is so unfair-“ You began to complain, before the ringing of your phone filled the truck.

Seeing Luke’s name pop up on your screen immediately caused your body to relax with relief but seconds later rage took over. You didn’t want to do this in front of Jay though. You were going to keep your cool. He probably had a perfectly good explanation. “Where are you? I’ve called you a million times. You were supposed to be here like 3 hours ago. I looked, your flight wasn’t delayed or anything.” You answered the phone without even saying hello.

“Yeah babe, listen I’m so sorry but I had that meeting today and it ran late so I just asked Carly to book out the company's plane, but she didn’t tell me until after the meeting Paul is using it for his conference in D.C. today. Which isn’t entirely my fault cause he never signed it off like you’re supposed to.” With every word he spoke your grip tightened around your phone.

“Tell me you're joking, please.” You said after a beat of silence.

“I promise I’ll make it up to you. I’ll get on the next plane out.” His voice was calm and steady, not concerned at all.

“Don’t bother.” You scoffed, ending the call. Jay had without a doubt heard every word of the conversation, but he also knew you well enough to stay silent.

Your group stood closely around the hole in the ground. You had more than enough room to spread out but you stood tightly together. Emily was securely snuggled into Cody’s side, he rubbed her back lovingly while his other arm was draped around his sister who stood beside you. On your other side Jay stood stiffly, his foot tapping anxiously, and his jaw clenched. Carson stood between him and Vanessa’s parents. Your arm was linked with Sydney’s and you continued to try and swallow the knot in your throat obviously failing as it just continued to get bigger. You weren’t going to cry today. You were going to be strong for everyone around you. So, you completely toned out the words your father was saying in front of the group currently. Instead focusing on the worm that was crawling through the dirt in front of you. You could feel your hands sweating like crazy rubbing your palms against your dress for the hundredth time, but this time Jay softly pulled your hand into his, intertwining his fingers with yours, squeezing gently, and rubbing his thumb in circles across the back of your hand. The weight of his hand in yours brought you a comfort you wouldn’t ever be able to explain and it was exactly what you needed in that moment allowing your shoulders to relax.

Later in the day everyone gathered at Vanessa’s parents for lunch. You had spent a ton of time at each other’s houses, but for some reason Vanessa’s was the main hangout spot all throughout your teen years. Probably because of the pool and finished basement.

“Hi sweetie.” Vanessa’s mom, Helen greeted you once again pulling you in for a hug.

“Hey, you need anything?” You quickly offered.

“Oh no. Sounds crazy, but just talking to you girls gives me a comfort I can’t explain. Even talking to those juveniles over there does too.” She gestured over to where Carson, Cody, and Jay stood in conversation.

“We’re just glad to all be here for you.” You said sympathetically.

“Hey, where is your new beau? Is he hiding around here somewhere? Did I miss him?” She made a show of looking around the room.

“Oh um no, his flight actually got cancelled unfortunately.” You lied, conveniently just as Jay passed you on his way to the kitchen scoffing loud enough for you to hear at your conversation.

“Oh how sad. I was hoping to meet him before the big day.” She frowned.

“I’ll do my best to get him back here before then. He has too many important people’s approval to gain. Starting with yours!” You smiled, squeezing her hand, but the thought of going back to Seattle tugged at your heart.

“I must say I never thought I’d see the day where you’d walk down the aisle and anyone but mister handsome over there would be standing at the end of it.” She gestured to Jay who was browsing over the assortment of cheeses.

“You and many others.” You laughed because to be completely honest, neither did you.

“I just hope he makes you happy.” Helen looked at you sincerely.

“He’s a good man, and he loves me.” You assured her, ignoring the disappointment you still felt in him at the moment.

“Just make sure that you love him,” she emphasized, “So, Richard and I haven’t been able to go through any of Nessa’s stuff yet. I know most of her stuff is at her apartment which we already talked about, but we would be happy if you guys looked in her room. Take anything you want.” She changed the subject.

“Helen I don’t want-“ You attempted to protest.

“No honey, seriously. You know how many clothes there are up there and even though I know I’d look good in them I don’t want to scar the boys by wearing crop tops around every day.” She joked.

“Are you sure?” You asked.

“You guys were her sisters, whether you came outta me or not, and it’ll really help Richard and I out.” She patted your shoulder.

“If you insist.” You sighed.

“I do. You go ahead first I’ll give you a head start and send the others up in a little.” She winked pulling you in for a hug before kissing your cheek and moving onto another guest. It was unfair. To have to play host at her own daughter’s wake, but that’s just how Helen was. She wanted every single person to know how much she appreciated them.

You headed up to Vanessa’s room, nothing different from the last time you were in it. She had so many clothes that both her closets in her apartment and her closet in her childhood bedroom were all packed full. You stood studying a picture that sat on her nightstand when a voice came from the doorway startling you,

“Hey.”

“Jesus, Jay.” You jumped, dropping the picture frame from your hand.

“I’m sorry, be careful.” He ushered you away from the big chunks of glass that now lay on the floor.

“Seems symbolic in a way.” You looked sadly down at the broken frame which held a picture of your group at prom.

“How so?” He didn’t look up, still carefully picking up fragments.

“Everything seems broken without her here. Like a piece of the puzzle is missing. It’s never going to be the same.” You hadn’t really been able to talk to anyone about what you were really thinking and feeling. You knew Sydney and Emily felt the same, and you could open up to them in any way you needed but somehow it felt like if you danced around the subject, if you didn’t truly address it, then it wasn’t happening. With Jay it was different. There was never a guard there. Just being in the same room with him allowed you to be honest.

“Yeah..I know what you mean,” Jay shook his head clearing his throat before he changed the subject, “So, flight got cancelled, did it?” He threw the pieces in his hand into the garbage at the end of the bed, standing up to face you.

“You follow me up here?” You asked, avoiding his obvious smugness.

“Helen sent me up here.” He chuckled.

“Of course she did.” You rolled your eyes. What were you thinking? She was you and Jay’s biggest stan and you had fallen right into her trap, “Although I’m not exactly sure any of this would fit you.” You gestured to the closet full of clothes.

“You don’t think I’d look good in this?” He pulled a slinky red dress out.

“We both know you’d look good in anything.” You teased, but it came out more flirty than you intended.

“Well, I think you should keep it.” His eyes moved from the dress down your body obviously imagining it on you.

“Unfortunately, I think Sydney might want dibs on this one.” You took it from his hand laying it across the bed.

“Well, I’m sure Kevin would appreciate your sacrifice.” He smirked, moving to rummage through the closet, “anything in particular you plan on staking your claim on?” You knew he didn’t really care what you took. He was just trying to fill the void with words until one of your friends arrived and he could slip out.

“No, not really.” You shrugged, you heard him sigh turning to face you.

“Why do you do that?” He questioned.

“Do what?” Your brows furrowed, arms moving to cross against your chest because for some reason it felt like he was looking right into you.

“You repress everything. You always have. You’re too worried about what everyone else is feeling. Like if you’re feeling it too it makes you a bad person.” He stepped closer to you, and maybe he really was looking into you.

“I’m fine, Jay.” You rolled your eyes, hugging yourself tighter.

“Stop, don’t do that. It’s me.” He said it as if that should still mean something after a decade.

“Just because you knew me 10 years ago doesn’t mean you know anything about me now.” You scoffed, but that knot was returning to your throat again. He took another small step forward, grabbing your hand with his to squeeze it.

“Talk to me.” He encouraged, a look of begging in his eyes.

“There’s nothing to talk about. We all know what is happening, Jay. She’s gone. She’s dead. That’s all there is to it. Crying about it isn’t going to change anything. If Helen and Richard and Carson are all holding it together, so can I.” You said nonchantly, but your voice shook. Two more deep breaths. You weren’t going to do this. You promised yourself you were going to hold it together today. They needed you to. Jay grabbed your face between his palms forcing you to look at him, but your eyes still wandered refusing to look at the baby blues.

“Look at me, [Y/N].” It was posed as more of a question than a demand, but you knew you couldn’t. You knew what would happen if you did and you just needed the damn knot to dissipate first. Unfortunately, the second he whispered, “please,” your eyes immediately snapped to connect with his. Sadness pooled in his pupils and just as you feared your composure unraveled, slow at first then all at once collapsing against his chest.

Without hesitation his arms fell around you pulling you closer. Sobs wracking your body, your tears soaked his neck darkening the collar of his shirt. He didn’t say a word for several minutes only pressed his face into your hair, his hand followed a pattern rubbing circles around your back soothingly just letting you fall apart in his arms until you were finally able to gain control of yourself again.

Sniffling you tried to wipe away any evidence with the back of your hand, but Jay beat you to it, both thumbs coming up in a poor attempt to clear the tears. “Same old, [Y/N/N].” He smiled lovingly.

“Maybe some things do stay the same.” You chuckled lightly, still only a breath away from the man, “I just wanted to be there for them.”

“[Y/N], you have been and you still are. That doesn’t mean you’re not allowed to feel your grief either. They don’t expect you to be a stone. You’re human too.” He reassured.

“What if I told you I actually wasn’t human.” You joked in an attempt to lighten the mood.

“So what are you? Like an angel? Cause that I could believe.” He grinned, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear moving just an inch closer. It was the world's worst pickup line but it still made your heart flutter.

“Jay..” You sighed instinctively.

“Tell me to stop..” He challenged, looking for hesitance to appear on your face, but it didn’t. Instead you grabbed ahold of his neck pulling his lips to yours. The spark was instant. An all too familiar feeling pooled inside your stomach. How could you have forgotten what this felt like? How could you have gone so long without coming back for this? You felt your back hit the wall harshly, Jay’s arms moving to completely block himself around you. Your hands fisted the lapel of his jacket pulling him impossibly close ensuring there wasn’t a single part of you not pressed against him. A small whimper escaped your throat at the feeling of Jay’s tongue teasing your lips, just before you heard the door knob begin to twist.

“Girl I swear if you took that red-“ Sydney pushed her way into the room, a loud,

“Fuck!” Falling from Jay’s lips as he hit the floor hard, clearly losing his balance from the hasty push of his chest you had given as a reaction. Sydney’s eyes moved from Jay’s body sprawled in front of her over to you who was still pressed tight against the wall. She kept her mouth shut, but a knowing smirk took over her features.

“Sydney! You know I look better in that dress!” Emily’s voice carried before she too appeared in the doorway over Sydney’s shoulder. “What’s going on here?” She asked with an eyebrow raised after taking in the situation.

“I don’t know, Em. What is going on here [Y/N]?” Sydney asked, sarcasm dripping off her words.

“We were just..” You looked to Jay for help.

“We were…looking to see what is stashed under her bed. Probably best for us to go through it rather than her parents. Everyone knows you hide the bad stuff under your bed.” Jay lied through his teeth flipping on his side to face the bed. You were hoping as a detective he could’ve come up with a better lie than that. He wasn’t wrong though. You knew she wouldn’t want her dad going through the stuff under her bed, and come to think of it probably not Jay either.

“Yeah..actually we,” you gestured to yourself and your two friends, “should probably be the ones to look under there now that you mention it.” Your friends knowingly nodded their heads in agreement.

“Alright then, I don’t want to know.” Jay got back onto his feet brushing his dress pants off, “I’ll just..let you guys do that. The guys and I will be downstairs if you need us..” Jay informed the three of you before brushing past you avoiding eye contact.

Maybe you weren’t wrong when you told Emily grief was the best aphrodisiac.

All Tag List:

@corebore123 @scarletsoldierrr @hehurst23 @beautiful-bunny89 @ingie @halsteadsway @malrunaway @grettiwrites @inlovewith3 @wanniiieeee @que-serasara @dedlund82

Jay Taglist:

@jayxhalsteadx @life-treatments @weepingfestivalmentality @toomuchtv95 @queen-of-arda @sofferderynnp @mrspeacem1nusone @chicago-pd-13 @maddi-bug @nevaehstreater18

Best of Me Taglist:

@iamasimpingh0e @keabbs @scenesofobx

@jlynmulti @notanordinaryprincess95

[aliceofthelongbottoms]

This was the first time Alice had looked put together since her grandparents were attacked. Her natural brown hair was starting to come through at the top of the pink and she had mostly worn comfortable clothes and just tied her hair up in a messy bun. Now, for the funeral, her hair was still the same colours but it was neatly straightened and pushed back with a black band. Her all-black outfit was freshly ironed her short, black, heeled shoes were polished. She had her mother to thank for how tidy she looked because the woman had been the one to help her pull herself together before the service. Now, she was in the Hogwarts corridors, leaving the refreshments happening in the Great Hall after the funeral. She had been holding herself together. Teary, of course, but trying to politely smile and thank people for their condolences. She needed out. Finding somewhere secluded, she pulled off the hair band and threw it across the corridor, ignoring the protesting portrait that it hit. She leaned against the wall and slid down, unable to fight back the flow of tears that started, "Fuck!" she exclaimed before a sob exploded out of her and she put her head between her knees.

[feraylocke]

TRAGEDY BEFALLS HOUSE LOCKE ; THE DEATH OF THE THREE LOCKE BROTHERS

lord nasir manderly returned from war with the news that lord bekarys locke, the heir of oldcastle, had died from his wounds after shielding amir from an arrow meant for him. lord okan locke and lord enver locke had fallen victim to a surprise attack while they were out scouting. when it was discovered they were sons of house locke, well known for following the old way and for their fierce loyalty to house manderly, both brothers were immediately beheaded and their heads were mounted on sticks in front of one of the northern camps. their heads were quickly retrieved and have been returned to oldcastle on the orders of nasir. amir was able to have bekarys' body sent back to oldcastle for a proper funeral.

house locke has been in deep mourning since receiving the news. lady feray locke returned to oldcastle from white harbor for their funeral rites and was pronounced as the heir to oldcastle upon her arrival. the only houses invited to attend the funeral rites and burial outside of house locke's own household were the houses known for following the old way. as it was a traditional funeral, only the men took part in the actual burial of the remains of the three brothers while the ladies continued to pray together. lady nasrin locke, formerly rowan, has not spoken a single word since receiving the news that all her sons had perished in the war.

feray did not leave oldcastle after the funeral before it was time to travel to king's landing for king jaehaerys' coronation. she has been sent there as the official representative of house locke as her parents both chose to stay home to continue their mourning.

[imagine-all-the-elves]

Imagine singing during a funeral after a battle and yourfavourite Elf, who doesn't know you yet, falling in love with you only to discover you're also a powerful warrior.

Author: @dawn-petrichor-world

Artist: Yec_yourz

[thestressedsimmer]

September 2nd, 1314

The next few days were a whirlwind of paying taxes and making plans for what to do. Unfortunately, Elusaid had no time to make any of them black clothing to wear the funeral.

It was just a normal mass, but she had managed to scrounge up some money to pay for her husband to have a small part of the service said for him. And today, they would bury him in the graveyard next to their son.

Father Undewyn told a beautifully upbeat sermon about how wonderful paradise is and how every sim has a chance to go there and reunite with their loved ones.

No matter how upbeat he tried to make it, however, this is little Malise's first experience with death - how unfortunate that it was his father.

[mxstball]

[CREATOR CLASH] [PLOT END] Finale

Heidi found a proper place to bury her All-Mother. There was a plot of land not too far off from the Clocktower. It seemed to have been undisturbed despite everything around it. Heidi started digging into it to give it some distance under the ground.

It... was finally over. She was... able to defeat Friede and keep her friends and family safe. Yet, sorrow plagued her heart. She missed her All-Mother already. Heidi wished that she could go back in time... spend more time with her.... She wished that Friede had changed her mind and wished to live with everyone... that her heart had never closed or that she never was traumatized.

Heidi wanted to protect her All-Mother, too... along with everyone else.

Heidi flew down and placed Friede's Legend Plate in the hole and re-filled it. She then took Friede's greatsword and stabbed it into the ground as some sort of tombstone.

"...Rest well, mom."

Heidi started to walk away--

--but stopped for a moment.

Heidi summoned Izanami's Legend Plate as well. She thought of the Arceus that gave her the opportunity to make the choices that she had... the enigmatic yet loving creator that wished nothing but the best for her, her family, and her world. She deserved to be given a proper burial as well.

Besides, just as she said, she's not an Arceus. As such, she had no use for this anymore.

Heidi found another plot nearby and made a hole. She placed Izanami's Legend Plate inside and then re-filled the hole. Heidi summoned a standard sword and plunged it down at the head of the hole.

"...You too, Nami. I promise that I'll do whatever it takes to keep our home safe."

Heidi turned around and walked away. She pulled out her Portal Gun and shot in front of her, stepping through it and into the Hall of Origin.

It was from this moment that Elysium became the Land Without a Creator -- for, while Heidi will fill that role for now, she will never truly identify herself as Arceus...

...and perhaps the world would be better without one, anyway.

[kimmiessimmies]

Wistfulness (22/34)

***Appaloosa Plains burial grounds, six days later***

“James...” Sarah whispered, “Who’s that guy with Granny’s gardener and housekeeper?”

[medusapelagia]

It rains

I’m I good at dealing with grief? Absolutely not. That’s why I should probably pay a therapist but instead, I wrote a very depressing little Steddie fic!

This is your warning.

TW: death, funerl, grief, sorrow, emotional pain, parent’s death

The day Mary Margaret Harrington dies it rains.

This is the only thing Steve is sure of. All the rest is a blur.

He knows that someone called him, that he answered his phone, and that his husband rushed to him, helping him sit on their second-hand couch while gently trying to pry open his hand that is still holding the phone.

It rains, and the water drops bounce on their terrace. The sound of the rain was always so comforting to Steve, but this time he doesn't feel safe and protected, he feels naked and raw.

It rains, and Robin's jacket is wet on the side when she hugs him, reassuring him that she is there and that they are going to go through this together as they always did. Her wife, Chrissy, must be somewhere with Eddie because he can't feel his husband's presence hovering over him but he knows that he can't be far.

It rains l, and it's the perfect rain.

The drops aren't too thin or too big.

They are the right amount to justify the use of an umbrella without bothering too much.

It rains, and the windshield wipers move from one side to the other, while the soft sound of the heating fills the air. Eddie has tried to make small talk but in front of Steve's stubborn silence he gave up and now he is driving in the traffic jam in silence, doing his best not to complain or insult the other drivers.

It rains, and Steve has a black suit in his bag, the one he wore on his wedding day. It feels a little bit tight but they didn't have the time to buy another one.

It rains, and they get to Steve's old house and Lauren, his mother's personal assistant, gives him a list with his mother's last wishes.

It rains, and Steve doesn't have to think while he gives his credit card to the woman to buy the exact nuance of roses his mother asked for, he doesn't have to think when he pays for the coffin that his mother chose, he doesn't have to think when he finds a letter with his funeral discourse written on it.

It rains, and Steve feels empty while moving from one place to another without really knowing what he is doing, his husband a step back but always at his side.

It rains when the funeral home comes to take the coffin.

It rains when they get to the church.

It rains during the funeral party.

It rains when all those unnamed people dressed in black say their goodbyes and hug him tight.

It rains when Steve closes the door behind Robin's back, the last person to leave.

It rains when he falls to the ground howling.

It rains when his husband holds him tight, whispering sweet nonsense in his ears, grounding him with his presence, praising him, and offering him comfort at the same time.

It rains when the dam opens and all the tears fall from Steve's eyes

It rains when he thinks about all the time lost, all the incomprehension, all the pain.

It rains when Eddie drags him to bed, makes him a chamomile, and gives him something to help him sleep.

It doesn't rain when Steve opens his eyes, surprised to find himself in his old room.

It doesn't rain when he finds a letter on his desk.

It doesn't rain when he opens it and finds a picture of his mother taken the day of his wedding, the same wedding she was determined not to attend.

It doesn't rain when he reads the words that his mother never told him. She asks for forgiveness and gives him her blessing

He cries, silently, and those words feel like a balm on an open wound.

They sound like peace.

[pastafossa]

Weirdly morbid question but what do you think Matt and Jane's funeral songs would be?

I only ask as I'm currently helping my friend plan his mum's funeral and we got to talking about what songs we would want at our own funeral. My song would probs be rainbow connection.

I'm so sorry about your friend's mom first off, he has my condolences, that's so so hard. 😔 I think Matt is Catholic enough that he'd find comfort in choosing a soft, peaceful hymn for himself like Amazing Grace. Something gentle that brings the comfort he struggled to find in life, something he hopes to find in death if he's lucky, something that captures just what he thought of himself while also bringing to mind peace for the people listening.

For Jane, I think I Was Here by Beyoncé hits the right note for her, especially after all the events of TRT. For someone who spent so long of her life forced to wipe away signs of her existence, who finally found a family and friends, was able to finally live a real life and find love, make an impact on people? A song like this would be perfect at the end.

They'd probably also have songs they each picked specifically to comfort whichever one of them is left behind - expect Jane to pick something like When I'm Gone by Joey + Rory to remind Matt things will get better, and expect Matt to choose something like How Long Will I Love You? by Ellie Goulding to remind Jane that his love won't stop, even after death might be an especially heartbreaking move if something like that also plays at their wedding.

I'd probably pick Somewhere Over The Rainbow/What A Wonderful World by Israel Kamakawiwoʻole personally. It's got the peaceful, comforting vibe I'd want my loved ones to feel.

[halstudandruz]

Best Of Me ~ Part 2

*Not my gif*

Pairing: Jay Halstead x Reader

Requested: Yes

Prompt: Part 1 can be found here

Warnings: Talk of death/funeral, swearing

You didn’t think you had any tears left after the last 3 days, but stepping into the church an hour prior proved you wrong. Breaking down in your mothers arms at the sight of your best friend. Vanessa looked beautiful dressed in a simple purple dress you and your friends had helped pick out. The line continued to grow rather than diminish with each hour. It was sure to be wrapped around the church now as you and your friends sat in the front pews. Assuring you were close enough to Vanessa’s parents and Carson that you were ready to step in at their beck and call. Also allowing you to greet many of your old classmates that filtered through the line. You were engaged in conversation with one of your old teammates from the cheer squad when Emily elbowed you hard in the side.

“What?” You turned to hit her back, but instead averted your eyes to the doors where she was clearly gesturing.

Your heart dropped at the sight of him. Why did nobody warn you he looked like that now. Good lord.

He was always attractive when you were younger. A blue eyed boy with an attitude full of charm and face full of freckles, but watching him walk in now..an obvious confident demeanor washing over him, freckles not as prevalent, muscles you could literally see outline his jacket, chest filling the dress shirt out, just the right amount of stubble, clean cut hair with just enough on top to still pull through your fingers if you wanted to, and those deep blue eyes that your swore could always look right through you.

“Are you fucking kidding me?” You turned towards your friends. Emily tried to hold in a giggle as Sydney sucked a breath through her teeth wincing,

“Yeah..” She put on an apologetic face. You could feel the heat creeping up your neck into your cheeks. Heart pumping faster in your chest.

“I uhm..” you cleared your throat standing up as he quickly made his way towards the front, “I need a minute.” You turned to make a beeline for the back exit closest to you. Where you were going you didn’t know, but it had to be somewhere away from the walls that were sure to close in on you the longer you sat in that room. Taking a long deep breath when you made it to the fresh air. The sun was just beginning to set, a warm breeze flowing through the air. Closing your eyes you leaned against the railing of the back entrance. Just trying to take in the silence.

“[Y/N]?” A voice broke through you like a sharp knife.. Oh god. You would know that voice anywhere. Only a little deeper since last time you heard it, and it immediately sent goosebumps throughout your limbs. No, not right now. You begged just hoping you would somehow find someone else standing in front of you when you came to your senses. But as you slowly opened your eyes you came face to face with him, and you could swear your heart dropped the whole way to the ground.

“Jay.” You replied, barely above a whisper.

“Uh hi..can I?” He opened his arms tentatively after a long beat of silence.

“Yeah, of course. Hi.” You laughed awkwardly pulling him in for a hug. His body hard against yours prevalent from the obvious years of growing up he had done. “It’s good to see you. I mean obviously not under these circumstances, but still..good.” You fumbled over your words internally begging your heart to stop echoing in your ears.

“I couldn’t agree more. This is certainly not how I imagined seeing you after all these years. How are you doing?” He questioned sincerity in his voice, leaning against the railing beside you and somehow the scent of him brought you a familiar comfort.

“As good as I can be. Just trying to make sure Carson and Helen and Dan have everything they need.” Jay chuckled at that,

“Always your mission to make sure everyone is taken care of before yourself. Some things never change.” He smiled warmly.

“Yeah, well unfortunately there’s only so much you can do in situations such as these.” You sighed.

“Well speaking of, I picked dinner up for everyone, Cody told me to park back here and bring it through the back. Mind giving me a hand?” He questioned.

“Yeah, absolutely.” You smiled, moving to follow him to his truck. Out of instinct he moved to grab your hand to help you down the steps. “Always the gentleman.” You giggled, but stopped to look up at him when you reached the solid surface, your hand still tightly in his.

“Sorry,” he cleared his throat dropping his arm, “that’s just one hell of a rock you got there.” He commented, opening the back of his truck to hand you a box.

“Oh..” you blushed trying to somehow hide your hand like he hadn’t already seen it, “yeah it’s definitely something.” You nodded refusing to meet his eyes as you took the boxes making your way quickly back up the stairs into the common room. Where your friends were waiting to sort out the food so anyone who stopped in could quickly get a snack. “Little help here.” You glared at Cody who only smirked taking the box out of your hands. “I’m gonna go check on everyone and see if they need anything.” You quickly made your way back into the main room successfully dodging Jay for the rest of the service.

“What’s this place called again?” You questioned grabbing your purse to follow Sydney and Cody out of their house.

“Molly’s.” Cody answered, helping you and Sydney into his truck.

“I really don’t think this is a good idea guys.” You sighed once Cody had gotten into the driver's seat and turned the truck on pulling up his GPS.

“We all agreed this was something we needed.” Sydney reminded you.

“Yeah well I’m just not really feeling well and I don’t want to bring everyone down.” You lied.

“Yeah nobody’s going to buy that. Just a few drinks and then we’ll leave, okay?” Sydney brushed you off. You nodded, unhappily. At least now you had time to prepare how you were going to act around Jay, but for some reason your brain was coming up blank, butterflies swirling through your stomach. You sat quietly as you stopped to pick up Emily and made your way towards your destination, anxiously tapping your foot until Emily put pressure against it unable to take the fidgeting.

“Okay, need I remind you all that fireball is off limits.” Cody looked around at the three of you eyes landing on Emily solidly after he pulled into a parking spot.

“It was one time! Are you ever gonna let that go?” She pouted, rolling her eyes.

“Unlikely.” He winked and the blush that took over her face was obvious.

“Let’s get this over with.” You grumbled unhappily climbing out of the truck.

You and your friends walked to the side of the bar as instructed leading to a patio lit with string lights all around you. Spotting Jay at a table in the corner along with Carson. Reluctantly trudging behind your friends you made your way over to them. Everyone piling into the table and conveniently leaving an open spot beside Jay. Quietly you pushed in beside him leaving as much space between you two as possible.

“It looks really nice here, Jay.” Emily complimented looking around at the open scenery.

“Best bar in Chicago.” He smiled warmly, “My tab is open go ahead and get whatever you guys want.” He offered. Emily and Sydney jumped at the proposal, but you stayed seated letting the conversation between the men around you take over.

“You okay?” Jay whispered causing you to jump.

“Yeah, all good.” You nodded tightly and you were aware he didn’t buy it but he let it go for the time being. Once the rest of your group returned with full cups you began to relax as the conversation became easy. Like you were teleported back in time laughing at all the memories, but still missing one crucial member of your group.

About an hour and a half in you noticed your friends were becoming tipsy. Emily and Cody were more outwardly flirting with each other than normal, Sydney was scoping the men out, but Jay was surprisingly still completely put together after his 3rd or 4th beer. Carson excused himself to get a ride home. Nobody expected him to stay long, but it was enough to get him out and really get to talk about Ness where he felt comfortable.

“Call if you need anything man.” Jay reminded him as everyone bid their good night to him.

“I will. Thank you guys again. I’ll see you tomorrow.” He smiled sadly climbing into his parent’s truck.

“I just wish there was something more we could do for him.” Cody sighed walking back towards your table.

“You know I really do think being there for him and with him is all we can do for now.” Emily squeezed his hand reassuringly. Everyone nodded still feeling the weight of the last few days still upon your shoulders, but it was somehow lighter together.

“So Jay..” Sydney slid into the seat beside the brunette previously occupied by Carson, a flirtatious smile covering her lips and you instinctively wanted to slap it right off.

“So Syd..” He encouraged her to continue leaning closer towards her. You willed your body to stay seated and not throw yourself between the two to create more space.

“Do you happen to know that tall dark handsome man over there? And what’s his situation?” She gestured towards a muscular curly haired dark man laughing at a table not far from yours.

“Luckily for you my dear friend, that is my man Kevin Atwater. Come on, I'll introduce you.” He stood up to pull her towards the opposite table, leaving you all alone as Emily and Cody had drifted near the jukebox.

“Normally we don’t do a whole lot of waitressing duty, but you look lonely. Can I get you anything?” A gorgeous Latino girl who you had noticed standing behind the bar a few minutes prior now stood in front of you.

“Oh thank you, but-“ You began to answer when someone else interjected themselves.

“She’ll have a rum and coke.” Jay responded sitting back down beside you.

“Poor girl looks like she’s had a bad enough night. She doesn’t need you coming over and making it worse just from your presence.” She teased.

“You and I both know how easily I can turn a bad night around.” Jay wiggled his eyebrows, “Gabby this is [Y/N] [Y/L/N].” He introduced you and you swore a visible lightbulb went off in her head.

“Gabby Dawson,” she stuck her hand out with a wide smile.

“Nice to meet you. How long have you worked here?” You inquired.

“Oh I’m actually a firefighter-paramedic over at Station 51. I co-own this bar with a few of the guys.” She explained and after putting the puzzle together you felt jealousy pit deep in your stomach.

“Oh well it is gorgeous.” You complimented, grinding your teeth a little. Jay wasn’t off-limits. You couldn’t seriously be annoyed at her having dated him you internally scolded yourself.

“Thank you, it’s always a work in progress. Let me just grab that drink for you.” She turned to walk towards the bar, delivering it a minute later, “don’t worry I put it on his tab.” She winked, leaving you once again alone with the former love of your life. The anxiety now coursing through you, grateful for the drink that was in front of you grabbing it to take a drink. You hadn’t planned to drink more than two, but clearly the situation called for it.

“So, that must be the ex?” You questioned, welcoming the warmth the alcohol elicited as it washed down your throat.

“How do you know about that?” His eyebrows furrowed.

“Cody told me you dated one of the owners here. Not that hard to figure out which one.” You shrugged, “So, what happened?” The drink rattled in your shaky hand.

“It was more of a fling. I liked her and dating her got me the job I have now so that was definitely a win in the end, but I didn’t stand a chance next to him.” He shrugged, gesturing to where Gabby leaned against the bar talking to a young blonde man.

“Mmm can’t say I blame her.” You giggled taking a sip of your drink.

“Well now that’s just rude.” Jay feigned shock, a hand falling to his chest.

“Anyone with eyes can see he’s attractive.” You shrugged.

“Oh, and I’m not?” He challenged.

“And they are so obviously in love.” You avoided the question, noticing the way Gabby’s eyes were full of light talking to the man.

“So, we’re avoiding the question then?” A hint of teasing sparkled in his eyes, but you didn’t dare stare at them too long.

“I just don’t think that’s a very appropriate question for me to answer.” Clearing your throat, did he really need the confirmation from you? He looked in a mirror everyday, he knows the obvious.

“Why not? Because of this?” His finger traced across your engagement ring, “I apologize I wasn’t aware this piece of jewelry suddenly took away your right to an opinion.”

“I’m allowed an opinion. I just don’t think it’s a good idea for me to give it on this particular subject.”

“Afraid to hurt my feelings?” Jay asked, but you once again disregarded him pulling a deep chuckle from his throat, “Well.. I want you to know that you are more beautiful than I was ever prepared for.” He looked at you sincerely, grip around his glass tightening.

“Jay..” You sighed.

“You don’t have to say anything. I don’t expect you to. I just want you to know that. In case you don’t get told enough.” Jay smiled softly and in an attempt to hide your blush your face drifted towards the ground.

“Anyone order another round of shots?” Cody danced over to you with Emily trailing behind, laying down another tray of full shot glasses on the table.

“No, nobody did.” You chuckled but he pushed one closer to you.

“Oh right that was me!” He shrugged, picking up his own shot to down, rolling your eyes, you followed suit. Wincing as the alcohol burned down your throat. “Thank you for your participation.” Cody saluted moving back to the corner of the room where he had apparently made a few friends. You had already done 4 shots that night against your better judgement, but this one had a different effect on you. Boldness beginning to boil in your blood. Sneaking a look to your left, the man beside you took your breath away. A grin on his lips as he watched his friend Kevin try to put the moves on Sydney and if Sydney’s loud laugh was any indication it was certainly working in his favor.

Deep down you knew the reason you didn’t want to drink tonight. Even if you didn’t want to outwardly admit it to yourself, it was becoming more obvious with each sip of alcohol. Your body tingling, warmth radiating down to your toes despite the cool breeze starting to roll through.

“Kev’s a really good guy. I think they could hit it off.” He turned towards you, smile immediately fading when he watched you start to slip the diamond off your left hand, dropping it onto the table with a clunk.

“You are.” You answered, your hand feeling a million times lighter and to be honest maybe your heart a little too. Your inhibitions began to slip and your assertiveness began to take over as you continued to lean in closer to him. His musky scent overwhelming you and your libido, and even if you would admit it to yourself now it was too late. Already too far gone to piece together the rationale of what you were feeling seeing Jay again. Grown up, confident, calm, composed, and as completely and utterly sexy as they come. “You are unbelievably, incredibly attractive now Jay and to be honest I’m not sure how I’m supposed to deal with it.”

And that confession was the last thing you remembered of the night.

All Tag List:

@corebore123 @scarletsoldierrr @hehurst23 @beautiful-bunny89 @ingie @halsteadsway @malrunaway @grettiwrites @inlovewith3 @wanniiieeee @que-serasara

Jay Taglist:

@jayxhalsteadx @life-treatments @weepingfestivalmentality @toomuchtv95 @queen-of-arda @sofferderynnp @mrspeacem1nusone @chicago-pd-13 @maddi-bug @nevaehstreater18

Best of Me Taglist:

@iamasimpingh0e @keabbs