#twd negan slowburn

[trashcanband4]

Therapy Sessions Ch. 3

Ch. 1   Ch. 2

Pairing: NeganxOc (Kelly). Setting: The Sanctuary. Warnings: Ooc Negan.

Three weeks went by. She would sleep on the other side of Negan’s bed. Wake up to him gone, do a morning work out, eat whatever small amount of food was left on a plate on the table then wait for Negan to come back just to be prodded with what he called get to know you question’s. These questions were so pointless and superficial that she swore that Negan was simply trying to bore her to death. Frankly she was getting tired of it.

It was after the twentieth or so question of the day that she asked, “Why are you wasting time and resources on me?” finally snapping, raising her voice at him for the first time. “Why are you dead set on this?” she stood up and looked down at him.

He glared up at her. “I don’t know. I just know I need to.”

“God, you are so…” she started but stopped, not being able to think of a word that described him.

“Charming,” he said as she stood up, looking down at her, “handsome, generous, drop dead fucking sexy as hell.” He finished with a smile and a slight lean back.

“Annoying…ass-hole…arrogant… bastard.” She spat the words at him then moved to turn around, but he grabbed her by her arm and pulled her back around to face him. Her eyes traveled to his hand on her sleeved upper arm then back up to his glaring, dilated eyes.

“I have taken it easy on you, Dead Girl.” He warned her. “Talk to me like that again and you’ll join Daryl on easy street.”

“Good, do it, it has to be better than do you like this, do you like that, when did you lose your virginity, when did you have you first kiss, blah blah blah blah blah.” She said in her best deep Negan voice. “If your goal is to drive me fucking bat shit crazy then congratulations you’ve won! The fucking gold metal goes to surprise, surprise, you! Asshole of the year everybody!” she was yelling at him and finally lashing out, but it wasn’t enough for Negan, he needed more.

So with glaring eyes and a strained grin Negan he wrapped his long fingers around her neck and shoved her back until her butt hit the edge of the table causing glasses to rattle then pressed his lips to hers. He was actually surprised that she started kissing him back and placed her hands on his sides. As her tongue snaked its way into his mouth she slid one of her hands up to rest on his chest. His hand on her throat relaxed as his eyes slipped closed. Feeling him relax she swiftly, slid her hand across his chest and used her forearm shove him back with all her might.

He stumbled back, hand still in there air where it had been on her neck as his eyes slowly opened. As he saw her panting with flared nostrils and fire in her eyes, a smirk spread across his lips. “Well, I wasn’t expecting that.” His words had no effect on her. “But that, right there,” he motioned to her face, “I did. You fuckin’ look like you want to murder me right now, Darlin’.”

“I fucking hate you.” she growled still seething in anger.

“According to that kiss, you fucking love me.” He said with another cheeky grin and a jerk of his chin.

“Don’t flatter yourself.” She told his as she walked around him. “It was a distraction tactic and it worked.” She grabbed her plaid shirt off of the bed and shrugged it on.

With her back still to him she drew in a calming breath then held it a few seconds. “Holy shit, he just fucking got to me. He fucking did it. I felt pure…raw rage for the first time since Markus left me. Oh my God, is that when all this started, when he left me? Is that when I started shutting down? And whoa, that kiss. I had thought about Negan kissing me before, when he first brought me here and I thought that sex is what he wanted from me, but holy fucking shit was that good.” After silently panicking she let the breath out. “What’s next, you gonna try to make me cry?” she asked as she turned around and walked past him and sat down in her dining chair on the left side of the table. “Boo hoo hoo my children died and my husband left me. You murdered two good men and took me away from my people. You made Kelly angry waah.” She rubbed under her eyes as she pretended to cry then dropped them from her faced and let her face turn sarcastic. “I don’t cry anymore. In order to cry you need to hurt and I can’t get hurt anymore.”

“Getting hurt is part of living.” Negan responded. “Shutting down like you’re doing is hurting you.”

“I can’t feel anything.” As she spoke her eyes fell to the floor. “What I’m doing is self preservation.”

“No, what you’re doing is selfish.” He countered.

“How so?” she asked.

“By not letting people in, you’re robbing them of the pleasure of knowing you, of having a friend in you. Hell you are drop dead fucking gorgeous.” She rolled her eyes at him. “Seriously, I’m surprised some poor fucker hasn’t turned just from lookin’ at you. If that kiss is any indication I’m sure you’re a good fuck too.” He was trying to get under her skin again.

“None of that is true.” She said with a head shake. “As for being a good fuck…I don’t even remember what I’m like.” She shrugged then leaned back in her chair, crossing her arms over her chest.

He moved to straddle her outstretched legs. Her eyes took in his big hands that gripped the arm rests of the wooden chair she was sitting in before she let them travel up his plain white t-shirt covered chest, his neck, his lips then his eyes. “Do you want me to help you remember?”

“No.” Negan was surprised to see that all that rage he had seen before was now gone and she was back to her cool calm collected self. “I may be mentally broken…but I still have morals. I’m not your wife.”

“Would putting a ring on your finger get you to open up to me…let me in?” he asked, still leaning over her, staring her down in the chair.

“No.”

“Tell me why not.” He said leaning down a little more as if that would get to her, “Explain yourself.”

“If you didn’t have other wives…If I knew making a vow and putting a ring on my finger would make me something special to you, then maybe it would help. Maybe, but you’ve already admitted between the lines that you don’t see them as real wives. So why would I want that for myself?”

“I guess as you see it now you wouldn’t.” he stood back up and moved to sit in the chair across the table from her. “But you’ve already got one advantage over them. I don’t allow them to sleep in my bed. I don’t give anyone anything without expecting something in return. Most people here, they work for points and those points are spent on what it takes to keep them alive and comfortable. My wives, they earn their keep by keeping me happy. Then there are the people that are good for nothing but working the fences.” He explained a bit of the inner workings of the sanctuary to her. “What have you given me to earn what you have been given? As I see it you are in negative points right now which is not a good place to be.”

“I didn’t realize that’s how it worked.” She said quietly, hating the fact that she was now in debt to him. “I’ll earn my point’s… Just tell me what to do and I’ll do it.”

“All I want you to do for now is let me help you.” he answered.

“I don’t know how to do that.” She whispered more to herself than him. “I can handle being thrown into a room to be isolated and abused. I can even handle physical torture, but I have spent years building up these walls that you’re asking me to break I…” for the first time in a long time she felt her eyes water, but she didn’t let the tears fall. “What if I break?”

“That’s what I’m here for.” He told her as he leaned up and placed his arms on the table. “If you break, it’ll be because I made you. So I’ll pick up the pieces and put you back together.”

“And how do I know I can trust you?” she asked sitting up to mimic how he had his arms cross on the table. “How do I know that you don’t intend on breaking me and leaving me that way? How do I know that you don’t get some sick sadistic pleasure out of breaking people?”

“Blind faith?” He answered and she shook her head no. “Do you know why I chose you?” he asked and she shook her head no again. “I’ve seen a lot of people with the same void look in their eyes and it never bothered me before, I never cared before. But something about you, something about how you looked at me, made me care. I care too much about you to break you indefinitely. I can’t find out what has drawn me to you until you are alive and care about the people in your life.”

Kelly sighed and let her head fall onto the table, her forehead pressed into the cold wood as she covered her head with her arms. “You might as well stick me in the cell next to Daryl. There is no fixing me. I’m too damaged…”

“You don’t have a choice, sweetheart.” His whispered, soft words made her pick her head up and rest her chin on her arms that she folded on the table. “I’m gonna fix that fucked up head of yours rather you fuckn’ want me to or not.” He stood up and locked the door and chained it shut. “You’re goin’ to stay right here. You can fight me every inch of the way, but it happenin’ darlin’.”

The fire was back in her eyes for a split second. So it surprised him when she said, “Fine.” And just like that the hatred in her eyes was gone, replaced again with emptiness. “Do your worst.” She said as she stood up and walked over to stand chest to chest with him. Her boldness also surprised him. She kept doing that, surprising him when he thought he had her figured out. “Try to make me feel something other than rage, but it won’t work. I…feel…nothing good.”

If he was being honest, she had him riled up, harder than a rock the way she kept glaring at him, her chest pressed against his. He wanted to grab her and this time push her against the door and take her right then and there, but he knew that wasn’t the way to go about getting to her to truly open up to him. Instead he bit his lip and nodded then walked around her to sit back down at the table. Her eyes followed him curiously. “You know, Daryl’s been asking about you. Every time someone goes in to feed him he asks where you are and what I’m doing to you. He’s threatened to kill me several times if I lay a hand on you.”

She sat down on the bed and pulled her knees into her chest. Negan noticed her start chewing on the inside of her lip as she stared at the floor. She had never done that before, but Negan had never spoken about how Daryl was doing before. He had mentioned here and there about what he was doing to Daryl and how he intended on breaking Daryl, but never had he mentioned Daryl’s side of things. Kelly had cared for Daryl at one point a long time ago. He’d saved her on more than one occasion and in more than one way.

“No comment?” he asked making Kelly’s dark eyes snap up at him. “Do you care about him?” he watched her suck her lip into her mouth and shake her head as her lips slid between her teeth. “Could’ve fooled me.”

“I cared about him…past tense.” She answered as she dropped her legs to hang off the edge of the bed.

“Tell me what you think about Daryl.” He told her as he leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms over his chest.

“No.” she shook her head, her brown frizzy waves slapping her in the sides of the face.

“Why not?” he asked, trying to not let his aggravation show.

“Because I’m not going to give you ammo to use against him.” She answered.

“What is said between us in this room stays here in this room.” he told her and she just stared at him. “As soon as I walk out of that door I will forget whatever you may tell me. We can’t talk about your past for forever. We need to talk about the here and now. The people you surrounded yourself with and what you think about them will tell me about you. So talk to me.”

“Fine.” She said as she leaned back to lay on the bed. “What I think about Daryl.” She sighed as she stared up at the ceiling. “He’s a damn good man. Loyal to a fault. Protective of his people. He’s saved me a lot, even when I didn’t want him to. We were close before I fell away from everyone.”

“What about Rick the prick?” he asked as he stood up and took off his leather jacket.

“God where do I start with Rick?” she scoffed. “He’s a leader, hardheaded, strong. He doesn’t take shit from anyone. He doesn’t always make the best choices, but his heart’s always in a good place when he does. He’s pissed me off more times than I can count, but he’s still a good guy.”

“What about that guy…Spencer?”

“Arrogant, entitled asshole not worth the air he breaths.” She answered quickly.

“Good to hear that, because I killed him yesterday.” Negan answered causing Kelly to sit up and look at him.

“Why?” she asked flatly.

“He was trying to weasel his way into my good graces…trying to play me and I saw right through it.” he answered.

“Stupid.” She said making Negan think she was calling him stupid for killing Spencer. He glared at her, making her realize how Negan took her word. “Spencer, not you.” she clarified. “So you’ve been inside Alexandria?” she asked and Negan nodded. “Have you met Judith, Rick’s daughter?”

“Yep, she’s a sweetheart. I made her and Carl dinner then rocked her to sleep while I waited for Rick the prick to come home. Speaking of home, you guys have it made there, electricity, running water…”

“I know I’m in no place to make requests, but can I ask that you don’t hurt Judith?” she asked quietly.

Negan stared at her for a second. “I’d never hurt a toddler.”

As he thought about Negan rocking Judith to sleep, she remembered that when she was brought to the doctor, one of Negan’s wives was leaving the office and the doctor threw away a negative pregnancy test as Kelly walked in. “Can I ask you something?” she asked and Negan motioned for her to talk. “Do you like kids?”

“I love kids, they’re the future. I worked with them before the turn.”

“Do you want kids?” she asked and Negan just stared at her for a second, trying to figure out what she was getting at.

He smiled a little, showing off his dimples before he finally answered. “I would love to have a kid one day.”

“Is that why you have all those wives? To try to have a kid before you bite the dust?” she pulled her knees to her chest again and wrapped her arms around them, thinking he was going to get mad or lash out at her.

“Hadn’t thought about it like that, but yeah, I guess that’s one of the perks.” He said with a smile on his face at the thought of having a kid. It didn’t matter which one of his wives was the mother. He just loved the idea of being a father.

After a while of sitting in silence, which was odd given that Negan was in the room, Kelly dropped her toned legs, clad in black yoga pants, from her chest and stood up. “Am I ever going to get to see what else is out there besides the doctor’s office and showers?” she asked as she walked over to the counter in the room and poured herself a glass of water. She took a drink as she turned and leaned her hips against the bar.

“The day you truly open up to me will be the day you see something other than these four walls.” He answered and she swallowed then nodded. “Oh, I almost fuckin’ forgot.” He said as he jumped up and walked over to her. “The doc. pointed something out to me today. Mentioned you might be needing these soon.” He took the glass out of her hand and replaced it with a stack of pink wrapped sanitary napkins. She wrapped her hand around the stack and dropped her hand as she looked up at him to see if he was embarrassed. Most men would be in this situation. The inner workings of the female body tended to make most men squeamish. Negan however looked amused. “Felt like a dumb ass walking around with those in my back pocket all day, just so you know.”

She smirked at him a little and simply said, “thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” He gave her a small smile in return. “Lucille used to make me go get those things all the time. She always got really sick during that time of month.” He said as he turned his back on her and walked away a bit.

As she scanned his back, taking in his broad shoulders, covered with a white t-shirt, slim waist and his ass, clad in grey pants, she felt the urge to touch him. “Fuck. This isn’t happening.” She told herself as she started chewing on the inside of her lips again. “I’m not starting to feel something for him. I just…I find him attractive, that’s it, plain and simple. I don’t like him or want him.” She reassured herself.

“You hungry?” Negan asked getting Kelly’s attention. “I’m fuckin’ starvin’.”

“I could eat.” She answered with a numb nod, Negan noticed the distracted look on her face, but decided to drop it for now. “What time is it?”

Negan looked at his watch then answered, “Six twenty-five.”

She realized then that she was actually starving and had missed lunch. “Time flies.”

“I’m gonna go grab us some dinner.” He said as he put his jacket back on and walked out of the door without another word.

When Negan was gone, Kelly pulled the sanitary napkins out of her pocket and looked at them, then around the room. She’d been there for almost a month now and in this world if you stayed in one place longer than that you started to call it home. Here felt nothing like home and as she looked at the napkins she realized they were the only things she could call her own here along with the necklace on her neck.

For the first time since she had gotten there she thought about Alexandria, about home. The old folded up photo of her kids that probably still sat on her night stand. The pictures they had drawn her that was still taped to the walls. Her clothes that hung in her closet. She missed having her own room and her own things. She didn’t think she ever would miss Alexandria.

With a sigh she tucked the napkins back into her pocket and took her necklace off of her neck. It had been so long since she opened it that she feared that it wouldn’t, but after sticking her thumbnail between the pieces, it popped open. The faces of her husband and children looked back at her. Her old life flashed before her eyes and before it could get to her, she clipped it shut and took a deep breath. She pushed back the tears before they could make it out of her eyes. Negan had really done a number on her when he pissed her off.

She was letting the breath out when Negan opened the door with a tray in his hand and a reusable shopping bag in the other. She hopped up and took the tray from him to place it on the table. “So what’s for dinner?” she asked as she turned back toward him.

“BLT’s and fresh fruit.” He answered and her mouth instantly watered. “But first I went shopping for you.”

“What?” she asked, a little confused.

“Here.” He handed her the shopping bag with a recycling symbol on the side of it and she hesitantly took it from him.

“What is this gonna cost me?” she asked still not looking in the bag.

“It’s on the house.” He answered causing her to glare at him. “It’s not a trap, I promise. I just figured you could use a few things of your own.”

“Okay…” she drawled as she set the bag on the bed and started taking things out. A hair brush with hair ties wrapped around the handle, bobby pins were hooked on the elastics, a notebook and a few different colors of pens, a Mac cosmetics lip balm that changed color depending on the ph of lips, a Too Faced black eyeliner and mascara set, deodorant, toothbrush, toothpaste, a compact mirror, tweezers, nail clippers, a nail file and a small tube of bath and body works hand cream. “Are you sure there’s not a catch? This is a lot of stuff and not cheap stuff I might add. The makeup alone is like, eighty bucks.” She knew she was making a good case for him to take the stuff back, but she didn’t want to owe him anything.

“Really, those three things are worth that much?” he asked disbelievingly and she nodded at him. “Well they’re worthless to me so take them.”

“Okay, if you insist.” She said with a nod.

While she put the things back into the bag, Negan started taking the lids off of their food. When she turned around she saw that he had found her necklace that she’d left on the table. She froze, as she saw that he had opened it and was looking at the pictures. When he looked up at her their eyes locked. “I’m guessing these are you kids.” He said as he looked back down at the pictures. “And this is your husband.” He pointed to the picture of Kell’s husband. “What are their names?” his tone told her that she had no choice but to answer the question.

“Darcy and Xavier were my kids. Markus is my ex husbands name.” she answered wondering why he cared what their names were.

“That’s what I thought.” He sighed making her cock her head at him in confusion.

“What?” she asked as he snapped the locket shut and handed it to her.

“Markus isn’t at Hilltop or The Kingdom.” She stared at him, wondering what he was getting at. “Markus is here. He's one of my men.” Negan said quietly.

Kelly just stared at him, a million thoughts flying through her head. Would he tell Markus that she was here? Would he use him to try to break her? She couldn't see Markus again, not when he was the cause if her shutting down in the first place. "Are you going to say something?"

"I don’t know what to say." She whispered as he took in the look of pure fear on her face.

"Do you want to see him?"

"NO!" Kelly answered louder than she meant to and Negan cocked his head to the side. "If I see him again I will not hesitate to kill him or at the very least re-break his nose."

"That is something I'd like to see." Negan told her with a smile then remembered that Markus's nose was broken when he first came to the sanctuary. "Wait, you broke his nose before he left Alexandria?"

"I told you things got ugly between us." She answered with a shrug.

"Elaborate." He told her as he picked up his sandwich, but when she didn't answer he looked her over a little closer and noticed her hand on her stomach. Seeing that she was so upset she couldn't eat he changed his mind. "Never mind. Calm down, eat your supper and well cover that topic in the morning."

Eventually her nerves untangled enough that she could eat and as soon as she was done she crawled into bed before Negan then quickly went to sleep.

[ajbwasntwriting]

Daughter!Reader X Negan, Reader x Daryl: Chapter 1. Darling Princess

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After the sneak peak tested well I decided to post the first chapter. I have many more already written and in the making but I’ll only post them if this gets a good reaction so please if you enjoy this please heart it, reblog it, and/or reply to it. Interaction inspires.

Sucking on another cigarette the stale tobacco burned your throat in a way you would’ve been disgusted by years ago. You looked out your window down at the gate, walkers pulling at it to try and get in. It had been a couple of years since Negan took power and more than long enough for you to feel trapped. You held the smoke in your lungs, a small part of your brain wishing it would ignite inside you and let you combust, before letting it out slow and smooth. Luxuries like this were meant to last. Another luxury was the leather loveseat you were sitting on, and the black and blue mosaic coffee table your feet and ashtray were on, and the acoustic gibson on your lap.

You placed the smoke between your lips to free your hand so you could strum the strings. You were playing an old rock balled your old man had taught you what felt like a life-time ago. He didn’t teach you to play guitar but when you came back from scouts playing campfire songs he insisted on teaching you some real music. You thought back on how many of his guitar strings you broke before that Christmas he bought you your own Washburn. The strings seemed to break less when the instrument was more your size. Those memories felt so distant now. As if they belonged to another person or were part of a movie you watched. The lyrics of the tune you were playing were on the cusp of coming back to you when your door opened violently somewhere behind you.

“My dearest daughter” Negan spoke as he entered your private room. You likened his new way of talking to that of a TV presenter. Always having to keep people on their toes. You used to think it funny when you were a kid but it wasn’t part of his personality then. “What are you doing here? Dinner was half an hour ago.”

“I’m not hungry” you shot back not even turning to face him, which would have been easy since the chair sat with its side to the window, but the walkers chewing on the fence were far more interesting.

“Y/N, don’t lie to me. You said the same at breakfast.” He sauntered over. Out of the corner of your eye, you noticed Lucille wasn’t with him.

“Food I didn’t earn doesn’t sate my appetite” you shot back, leaning forward to put out your smoke in the ashtray. That must have stirred something within him because the next thing you know you were grabbed by your arm and dragged out of your room, the guitar hitting the ground with a sorry sound. You let him drag you without protest, knowing better.

You were pulled into a plush dining room, immaculately furnished with white cushioned chair and a long oak table, set with silver cutlery. There were five sets in total for you, your father, and three of his ‘wives’. You figured this was some sort of ‘happy family’ play he’d act out but you didn’t know who the viewer was. You? The wives? The men? Or maybe knowing you didn’t want to be here was entertainment enough.

You were shoved into a chair next to the head of the table across from Frankie. She looked comfortable while nursing her drink but you reckoned that wasn’t her first. In front of her sat a bottle of vodka, distilled on-site by worker number 12. Fat Joey was filling the bowls with soup when your father shoved your chair in. He plopped himself into the chair next to you at the head of the table.

“Now isn’t this nice. A big happy family dinner before your old man takes off tomorrow.” You didn’t dignify him with a reply, instead motioning to the bottle of vodka in front of you. 

“May I have some, Frankie?” she looked at the bottle then smiled at you 

“Go ahead, Princess”. You picked up the bottle and filled your glass half-way to spite her for that nickname. 

“Thank you” you tried to be civil, as badly as you wanted to just walk off with the bottle, you sipped your glass instead.

You silently started the soup. The veggies were cut into large pieces. Perfect, chewing gave you a reason not to talk to the dickhead to your left. Your eyes were too buried in your soup to see the other two wives staring at you and your father who was boring holes into your head with his eyes.

“How was your day, Y/N?” Tanya perked up

“Same as yours” you replied with a mouth full of carrot and potato

Silence

“Where are you going tomorrow Negan?” Nicolle added.

“Ladies.” Your father spoke out, his tone showing his distinct lack of patience. “I’m not an idiot. I can tell that our darling daughter doesn’t want to share our company.”

“I made that obvious in my room.” Your spoon fell gracelessly into your bowl. “Why am I here?!” 

He reached over and rubbed your cheek affectionately. “Because I love you. And!” he punctuated the final word by raising a finger in front of your face, a silent cue to wait. He stood up from his chair and took off out of the room and down the hall. You took this moment to talk to his wives.

“You don’t have to be nice to me,” you said before starting to shovel soup into your mouth.

“Like hell, we don't.” Frankie retorted, earning a short child from one of the others. You chuckled and swallowed the food in your mouth. You picked up your glass and gestured it at Frankie

“Take notes, Ladies. Frankie doesn’t try bullshit on me” Frankie gestured her glass back. You guessed she’d been in a similar situation, forced to get along with people because it was easier. She didn’t try to be your friend because you knew you wouldn’t appreciate it, which in a weird turn of events you appreciated.

Your father arrived back. It was now you noticed he was a lot cleaner than usual, even the signature leather jacket had left him. Now you were alarmed. In his hands was a pink box with a purple bow. He placed it in front of you and kissed the top of your head. “Happy Birthday, Y/N.”

“Is it my birthday?” you asked, not quite sure. Time had become a blur since the end of the world. You pushed your bowl away to bring the box in front of you.

“Give or take a few months. I know I’ve missed a couple what with...everything...so this will count for at least one of them.” He placed a hand on your shoulder giving it a little squeeze, your own hand finding its way on top “There’s a lot more gifts coming for my princess, don't you worry.” You couldn’t help the smile that came to you, giggling slightly. You looked up at him, seeing nothing but unconditional love being sent back your way 

“Dad, it’s alright.” You smiled and turned back to your gift. The wives were now watching, captivated by this little bit of humanity at the end of it all. You gingerly opened the bow and lifted the lid off.

Inside lay a military knife, clearly hand-made on-site with a beautiful leather handle and your name carved into the side in cursive. You released a breath you didn’t realize you had been holding. You picked it up, finding it fits in your hand perfectly. 

“It’s beautiful” you near-whispered, watching as the candle lights hit against the metal. In a moment it was lodged in the table a mere inch from Tanya’s hand. You kicked back your chair, making your father step back, and grabbed the vodka bottle in one motion. “Now if only I had a reason to fucking use it” you spat as you stormed out of the room.

Back in your room, you sat in the corner with your head against the cold-glass window, looking down at the dead, only illuminated by the moon. You had killed so many of them before arriving at Sanctuary. Hell, you’d say you saved your old man’s ass more than he saved you...but he was a people’s person. Ruthless. But a people’s person. ‘Let me do my thing and I’ll have these assholes sucking my dick in days’.

That was a different age. Back when your father was a teacher. Back when your mother was sick. Back when your father cheated on her with anything with a pulse and she took it out on you. Back when your mother’s treatment and your father’s lifestyle drained your college fund and you had to enlist. Back when she’d attack you, both emotionally and physically, and you took it cause you knew she was in pain.  Back when you had come home from a 16-month mission because her condition had worsened. Back when the world went to shit. Back when you had to put her down because your sleazeball of a father wasn’t man enough to do it. You looked down at the dead and thought, if you reached your hands through the wires...you could be back with your mom.

Your door opened slowly, heavy footsteps coming your way. There was no need to look. Only one person would enter your room without knocking. “You scared Tanya back there, Princess.” your father spoke in a low voice. 

“She can take it” you croaked, a clear sign you had been crying. He kneeled down beside you. In the reflection of the window, you could see him holding out the knife.

“Please take it.” You turned around, your back now pressed to the window.

“Why?”

“You need to be able to protect yourself”

“Give me a gun then”

“No.”

“Why? Scared I’d leave.” You took a swig of your drink. 

“I see you’re upset-”

“Do you?! Do you really?” you cut him short, stumbling to your feet using the window to push yourself up. “Why am I upset? Because I eat food I don’t deserve? Because you make people die for me? Because you have me trapped in a fucking tower like Repunzel or some shit!?” That earned a chuckle from him, which only served to piss you off. “I should be down there earning my bit just like everyone else.”

“Do we have to go over this again?” He sighed dramatically. He cupped your face, the knife now dangerously close to you. “You're my daughter Y/N. My darling baby girl. My precious princess”

“I was twenty-six when this shit hit, dad” you mumbled through your squished cheeks. He gave them a little loving slap.

“You're valuable to me, which means some people might want to hurt you. You eat to stay alive, people die because they’re stupid, and you live in this room on this floor so you can be kept safe.” you blew him off with a wave of your hand and an angry sigh. You pushed passed him to your bed, twirling to sit on it and start taking off your combat boots. He walked over and lodged the knife in your headboard before kneeling down to look up at you. “I have to go out for a while. Find this Rick Grimes asshole and get some payback for the fifteen men he killed at our outpost.”

A chill went up your spine “The one near the hilltop settlement” you whispered. 

“That’s right.” You looked him in the eye, not noticing how your lip quivered.

“You don’t have too.” you didn’t know if it was the booze or genuine worry for human life but you found yourself begging. “We have more than enough peo-” he shushed you soothingly, his hand coming up to your cheek, rubbing soothing circles. 

“Oh but you know I have too, and while I’m gone I don’t want anyone to get ideas on what they can do to you so” he nodded towards the knife. You pulled it out of the wall, looking it over before nodding, mouthing ‘okay’ and depositing it in your nightstand table. He kissed your forehead before leaving, wishing you a good night. Once again alone you took two large gulps of your drink and laid down.

Edit: For creative reasons Y/N is now 26 at the beginning of the apocalypse instead of the original 24

[takeiteasypeasybaby]

Save Me: Chapter 18 - Angel or Devil?

~Hey guys! Chapter 18 has just been released ❤️ This is a dark chapter, so I’m just forewarning everyone that if anyone is triggered by sexual assault/rape then avoid this chapter. As always, love you guys and stay safe ✌🏻~

Molly and Negan were unstoppable, inseparable. Or so they thought? With Molly being put into harms way because of Negan, will he ever be able to forgive himself?

A couple days had passed since Negan and I came out as a official couple.

He always joked that we were now the King and Queen of the Sanctuary but I just rolled my eyes every time.

I was nice though, seeing him this genuinely happy.

But, in my heart, I knew it wasn't meant to last. Things right now were too perfect.

I had officially moved into Negan's room and now my room was like an office.

I guess this was what he meant way back when, when he asked me to help him run this place one day.

Negan was still the leader of course but now people knelt when I walked by too.

It was a curious feeling, it felt dated and wrong but at the same time it was exhilarating.

I felt like I was worth something, like people depended on me, more so than people ever did back home.

Sure, some people talked, but I didn't care because the majority were happy for both of us and I think that a lot of people liked having me by his side to calm his moments of rage.

There were far less punishments after all.

But some would always blame me and call Negan weak, especially Simon.

This was made worse by Negan's decision to demote him.

'There's my girl' Negan said smirking and sauntering up to me in the main hall.

He wrapped an arm around my waist as I was taking inventory of the food stuffs.

'You don't have to do that' Negan said confusedly.

I sighed 'I know, but I want to. I can't just parade around here without pulling my weight' I said turning around to face him.

'Well, all I'm saying is that you won't have time to do that once you accept your new position' he said smiling excitedly.

I tilted my head in confusion, 'what position? I thought we talked about that' I said in a hushed tone so no one could hear, even though all eyes were on us.

'I know that you're my partner darlin, but I need someone by my side in all operations, and you'd be goddamn perfect for that' he said softly and still smiling eagerly.

I looked at him hesitantly.

'Are you asking me to become your right hand man...I mean woman?' I whispered, he just nodded while smirking.

I sighed, 'but I'm not a Saviour?' I said slowly.

'I know that doll and I get that this is a lot, but I can't trust anyone else' he said softly.

'Besides, I've already given Si his notice' he said nonchalantly.

My eyes widened at this.

'You did what?!' I yelled in a strained whisper which now people could hear.

'He already hates me enough' I said sternly.

'So what if the asshole's threatened by you, maybe it'll kick him up the ass enough to get back in line' he said scowling.

I sighed and asked 'can I at least think about it?'.

He nodded in response as I walked back out of the hall.

Negan stayed in the hall, people asking him questions as I left.

I thought we had agreed on my position, but apparently not.

I rubbed my neck in frustration as I walked down the hall which was dimly lit for some reason.

There was silence, you could hear a pin drop.

Only the sound of my footsteps echoing down the hallway, when suddenly a large arm grabbed me at the corner and pulled me against the wall.

It was darker now, but I could make out the face.

It was Simon.

He shoved me forcefully against the wall, I winced at his aggression.

'What the hell do you want?!' I shouted.

'You. It seems, that around here you have nine fucking lives honey, so I'm gonna teach you a lesson' he snarled as he pinned my arms by my sides.

He was far stronger than I was.

'Help!' I screamed as he put his hand over my mouth, he chuckled sinisterly.

'Don't worry, I've made sure that Negan is occupied. He won't hear you, no one will' he said grinning viciously at me.

Although he had my arms pinned down, my legs weren't.

With all my might I collided my knee with his balls.

He winced and weakened his grip immediately.

I tried to get away but he pulled me back by my hair and landed a punch straight to my face.

I crashed down to the concrete floor immediately, the impact of the surface colliding with my head knocked me almost unconscious.

He punched me over and over, in my stomach, my legs, my face he left relatively untouched.

I was weakened, floating in and out of consciousness, lying on the floor and blood gushing out of my nose and cheek.

The shock concealed my pain until after.

I heard him unbuckling his jeans and I knew what was coming.

He pinned down my arms, digging into my skin as his weight crushed me.

I was numb, frozen and unable to move. Tears rolled down my cheeks.

A short while later, he stood up and spat venomously 'now I get what Negan was talking about'.

He pulled up his jeans and said 'now, you tell Negan about any of this, I give the heads up to my guys to kill your sister Tara, might even let them rape her first. Depends how I'm feeling. Oh, and tell your boyfriend that you want me to get my position back'.

He chuckled as he walked back down the corridor, leaving me there in a pool of blood on the floor.

Even after he left, I still felt him on me like I was somehow infected.

I lay there, shaking as tears continued to roll down my face, mixing with my blood.

As soon as I heard footsteps getting louder and louder, I knew someone was coming and I remembered what Simon had said.

I couldn't tell anyone.

I tried to gather myself back up and scrambled at the ground to pull myself off of the floor when I figure stopped dead in front of me.

Sherry.

I quaked and shivered in front of her, my entire body revealing cuts and bruises.

Her eyes widened as she was stunned to silence, 'oh my god' she whispered.

'Oh my god, Molly. Molly are you okay? What the hell happened?' she asked rushing over to me frantically.

As soon as I saw her face, I broke down.

Tears rolled more ferociously down my face now, I stuttered and scrambled to make words come out of my mouth.

She hushed me as talking made me more nervous, instead she held me up and stroked my hair as she brought me to my room.

There was no one else down the corridor, just me and Sherry.

Her eyes were filled with tears like mine at my pain.

She held me up all the way to my door and laid me gently down onto my bed.

'Shhh, I'm here now. I'm here. You're okay. You're safe now' she repeated as she stroked my hair.

'I'm gonna get Dr Carson to check you out. I'll lock the door behind me, don't worry' she said calmly as she walked towards the door.

She knew exactly what had happened without even asking.

I didn't know whether that was comforting or worrying, thinking the same might have happened to her.

'No, please Sherry! No one can know!' I yelled in between tears.

'You could get an infection and I'm not losing you. I'll make sure no one is around okay? Trust me' she said calmly.

I just nodded slightly.

I lay there, still until the Doctor came.

When he saw the state of me, he was overwhelmed.

'Molly, Dr Carson is gonna take a look at you, okay?' Sherry said quietly as she guided the Doctor into my room.

He sat nervously on the edge of the bed as he scanned over my bruises and cuts.

'Molly, the Doctor will need to touch you, is that okay?' Sherry asked nervously, I just nodded while I closed my eyes tightly.

I hated the thought of anyone touching me after what I went through, but I just kept thinking that the quicker I healed, the sooner I could see Negan.

He checked for broken bones. There were none, just a sprained wrist.

He then disinfected and covered the cuts, stitched up the more open ones.

Finally, he slowly handed me a morning after pill. I looked at it for a second, so did Sherry.

That was when it hit me.

I took it with a sip of water and just lay there while the tears rolled down onto my cheeks which were burning from the bruises.

He left paracetamol for me, alongside some bandages and antiseptic.

I just nodded at him and he left.

Sherry could barely look at me, her eyes so full of sorrow.

'I-I am so sorry that this happened to you Molly' she said crying as she sat down next to me.

Her face now hardened with anger, 'who did this to you?' she asked sternly.

I looked away and took a deep breath.

'If I tell you, you have to promise me that you won't do anything about it' I said sternly as my voice was shaking.

'Molly...' she said softly.

'Promise me!' I yelled as tears continued to flow.

She just nodded softly, 'Simon' I said hesitantly.

She looked at me with wide eyes, in silence.

'But if you told Negan...' she said softly.

'No. If Negan finds out, Simon will kill my sister and I don't doubt that he has people ready to do it if he gives the word' I said softly.

'He has to pay for this' Sherry said, rage filling her body.

'He will, eventually. But not now and not soon' I said shaking my head.

'What about Negan? He'll want to see you?' she said worriedly.

I nodded, 'you'll think of something to tell him' I said seriously.

She looked at me with her eyes wider than before, 'what would I say?' she asked frantically.

'I don't know. But you have to promise me Sherry, that you won't let him see me. I need you to do this, for me and Tara' I begged.

She sighed and looked to the floor, 'The doctor won't tell and I'll tell Negan that you're ill, but you'll be fine' she said nodding at me in reassurance.

I smiled weakly at her and thanked her.

She then left me so I could rest.

I lay there, staring up at the ceiling for what felt like hours. I couldn't sleep, I didn't feel safe enough to do so.

Suddenly there was a gentle knock at the door, my eyes widened as a rush of anxiety came over me at the thought that it might be Negan.

'Darlin, let me in' he said calmly.

My eyes teared up at hearing his voice.

I shut my eyes tightly and prepared myself so I sounded like I wasn't in pain.

'I'm just about to go to sleep' I shouted from the other side of the door.

'Darlin just let me see you, please. Sherry said that you we're ill. I wanna take care of you' he said softly.

I could hear the pain in his voice. Tears flowed down my face.

All I wanted was to just open that door and have him hold me forever and tell me that everything would be okay.

But I couldn't.

I wiped my eyes and sniffled as I composed myself.

'I’m pretty tired, I just want to sleep and I've got the flu so I wouldn't want to make you ill too' I said, pressing myself against the door frame, trying to feel him through the wood.

'In sickness and in health darlin. Just let me in' he said now with worry in his voice.

'I’m fine, I promise' I said sternly.

'I thought you moved into my room? Why don't you sleep there? You'd be more comfortable and I could be there for you' he said as his voice was breaking revealing the hurt he was feeling, not knowing why I was being distant.

I clenched my eyes tightly shut in agony. Tears flooded my face at his pain and mine.

I took a deep breath, knowing what I needed to do.

'I just need some space.  The move was too soon and I don't want to be your right-hand guy. Please, just give me time' I said sternly.

He was silent on the other side for a few minutes.

'Do you love me?' he asked sternly as I heard him bang his head against the door.

I wiped away my tears.

'Of course I love you. I just need time to myself to think' I replied weakly.

'Goodnight' I said gently, which he didn't respond too.

I only knew he had left once I heard his footsteps get quieter and quieter.

I limped back into bed, scared because I knew full well that he couldn't give this up.

He would come to my door every night and beg me to let him in.

A week later...

After a week of trying he came once more.

'Darlin, you better move back from this door because I'm about to break it down' he said sternly.

I gasped as his men broke the lock and the door swung open to reveal Negan standing there in front of me with three of his guys.

My bruises had faded slightly but they were still visible.

He just stared at me, tears forming in his eyes at the pain I was in.

'Leave us' he said sternly to his guys who immediately nodded and walked away.

Negan shut the broken door somewhat behind him.

'What the fuck happened?' he said, rage filling his body as he walked slowly towards me.

I tried to hold back my tears and fear.

'Nothing, I was sparring with someone and got hit. I'm fine' I said cooly as I moved away from his gaze and pulled my boots on.

'You're not fucking fine. You have bruises all up your arms' he said as he tried to reach out to touch me gently.

I flinched and yelled 'don't touch me!'.

He looked at me in confusion and worry. 'Darlin...' he said worriedly, making me fight back my tears once again.

'I said I'm fine' I said sternly as I turned and walked out of the door.

He paced after me. 'I don't believe you. I know you, you are the love of my goddamn life so I know when you're not telling me something' he yelled after me.

'Did someone hurt you?' he said slowly as he stopped in front of me.

I looked into his eyes, trying hard not to cry.

'No one hurt me, it was an accident then I got ill okay?' I said as I kept on walking, trying not to look at him.

'I need you to leave me alone, please. I need space' I said as I walked faster.

He stopped dead and didn't respond.

Silence echoed through the corridor, he had let me go...

[negansmistress1987]

Masterlist for MINE

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

[krkekcnehx]

Negan’s Rose - Chapter 1

Word count: 2351

Warnings: mentions of hunger pains.

This is my very first chapter of my very first fic. This just kinda sets up the character and lets you get to know her a bit. More exciting things are to come in the next chapters. If you read this, thank you !!!

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Chapter 1

You had been on your own for four months before everything changed. You had managed fine at first, finding an old barn about a mile off of a small stream that ran through the trees. You were lucky to have a source of fresh water and used it to wash yourself and your clothes, making you more presentable than the average survivor. When you investigated the barn for the first time it was completely empty apart from a few bales of hay that you had used as a makeshift mattress. There were no signs of life in the barn so you hesitantly made it your home for the time being. You spent the time scavenging in the small neighbourhood close by, it was a three mile walk each time however your scarce food supply was slowly depleting and you had hopes of finding others you could join. You were a natural introvert before all of this and you thrived being on your own. You loved curling up with a good book and a mug of hot tea while the sound of the rain calmed your mind after a busy day at work, but those cozy days were over and circumstance had forced you to become a people person. Over the weeks you were becoming weaker and weaker, the hunger pains getting worse. You were gonna have to go further out if you had any chance at finding new supplies and food.

You awoke at sunrise and the familiar dull hunger hit you immediately. You sipped on some water you had collected from the stream the night before, hoping it would briefly soothe the ache before you had to resort to eating the last of your food. With weak shaky hands you combed your hair through with your fingers before securing it in a tight braid the way your mother had taught you as a child, letting it rest on your neck. You had picked up the ginger gene from her side of the family and got your looks from her too. Your porcelain pale skin contrasted against your bright golden hair and red lips. You were the centre of a lot of attention before the world went to shit. Men liked you. You were witty and charming and had striking good looks. It could disarm a man and make him fall to his knees, but a year of surviving in this world had taken a toll on you and it was evident, with your protruding cheek bones and deep set eyes as green as the forest. You had dark circles and you looked and felt weak, not remembering the last time you had had a decent meal. Any muscle mass you had gained was withering away and your ribs were beginning to become prominent. Adapting to this new world was tough, you hated violence and couldn’t use a gun to save yourself. Literally. Guns were never your thing and your mother taught you to use violence as an absolute last resort. This wasn’t much of a problem in the old world as you could talk your way out of most things, manipulating the situation to your advantage. You had an incredible gift for reading people and a sharp, quick sense of humour which you assumed you picked up from your father, your mother telling you stories of how he had smooth talked and charmed her. This had helped you in the past when you came across other survivors, convincing them to trust you and let you join their groups. You never had any bad intentions but you knew that you had to convince them you didn’t anyway, they were wary of who to take in, naturally. But you knew you couldn’t rely solely on your personality and had to adapt your mentality as you navigated through this new world, forcing yourself to learn to use a knife. You had only killed a handful of walkers and it didn’t get any easier each time. Your breath still caught in your throat whenever you came face to face with them as you forced yourself to unfreeze and defend yourself.

You double checked your back pack making sure you had everything before you set off. Water bottle, a spare knife, a small blanket, the last granola bar you were down to and an old tattered photo of your mother and your older brother. You traced the outline of their faces with your fingers, losing yourself momentarily in memories of a past life. This was your only family and not knowing where they were, if they were even alive ate away at you, however you were good at repressing these things. The absence of your father growing up had rendered you cold and taught you to lower your expectations. You failed to form meaningful bonds with the groups you were a part of before so as not to get hurt, but this left you extremely lonely. On multiple occasions your mind retreated to a familiar dark place and you had thought about ending it, but you were strong like your brother and kept on going. You knew that there were other people out there you just had to find them.

You took another sip of water, the hunger still gnawing away at you as you tried to hold off on eating the last of your food for as long as you could manage. You always kept your boots on in case you had to run. You tied your plaid shirt around your waist over the only t-shirt you had, an old faded camp shirt that was another reminder of your past life. The summer had been harsh and unrelenting and scavenging and walking miles in the Georgia heat had been brutal, constantly testing your thirst however it was coming to an end and you knew the winter was going to be even worse if you didn’t find somewhere more secure. You slumped your denim jacket over your shoulders and put on your backpack before leaving the small barn, knife at the ready. You would miss your makeshift home that had sheltered you from the world, but you hoped someone else would find it once you had left. You didn’t know exactly where you were going but you wanted to make it to the small town a few miles away before the sun rose fully in the sky. You made your way through the woods, the familiar ache in your legs from your daily hiking trips to the water stream resurfacing as you picked up your pace. The sun was still rising so the woods were dusky, gloomy but peaceful. You walked for about two hours before you reached the long dirt road that led to the town. You allowed yourself to stop for a rest, stretching your legs and taking the smallest sip of water, knowing you had to conserve it for the day. You balled your hands into fists and pushed your stomach inwards, tricking it into feeling full to try and distract yourself from the growing hunger pains, a trick a former leader of an old group had taught you.

The silence you had become accustomed to was suddenly interrupted as you heard the snarl of a walker emerging from the other side of the trees. Walkers were rare when you were deep in the forest and you only had to deal with the occasional straggler, however you were edging closer to your destination and knew that there would be more walkers ahead. You quickly grabbed ahold of your knife taking a deep breath and in one swift move brought it down on the poor thing’s skull, instantly silencing it. You couldn’t help but wander if he - No, it- you reminded yourself had a family before all of this. You swiftly pushed that thought aside knowing it wouldn’t do any good. Even though it was smaller than you and weak, killing it had used a lot of your energy and you were starting to feel faint. You knew you were going to have to regain some strength if you were going to walk another hour and a half until you reached the town -Fuck it- you thought reaching into your backpack for the granola bar. You struggled to even open it, using more strength than you had as you took a small bite, appreciating how it felt in your mouth, the maple syrup it was coated in feeling sweet on your tongue. It was like heroin. You chewed slowly and deliberately, savouring it as you broke up the rest of it into three parts before putting it securely into your pocket, saving it for later.

You wanted to curl up in a ball on the dirt road for a few moments, your whole body exhausted and hungry. You had no time to stop and rest as you saw another walker emerge from the trees about 40 feet away from you. It was slowly making its way towards you however it was big and you knew it could easily overpower you in your current state. You forced your feet to move, ignoring the burn in your chest. You were faster than the walkers. If I keep walking it can’t get to me. This was the mentality you adopted for the rest of the day.

You had been walking for about an hour and had put some distance between you and the now group of walkers that had gathered. There was about five of them and even though you were practically running you still looked back at every chance you got. You came across the familiar sign for the town, telling you you were half a mile off. Not long now. Then you can rest. You kept a steady pace as you sipped on your water. The town came into view on the horizon, little houses and stores all lined up. You had lost the walkers that were trailing you and you were hoping the town was as empty as it was when you had re searched it for the hundredth time the week before. You felt the familiar heeby jeebies as you made your way down the desolate street, desperately wishing you had someone with you, the loneliness getting to you. It was times like this you wish your brother was here to crack a joke. You couldn’t remember the last time you had laughed.

You stopped outside a house you had searched before knowing it was free of walkers. You cautiously searched the lower half of the house, checking the kitchen, living room and small bathroom making sure to check behind every door. You made your way up the staircase methodically doing the same thing in all the rooms. Once you were convinced the house was still empty you made your way to one of the bedrooms. You had to deal with your hunger straight away as it was becoming all consuming. You found the rest of your granola bar and told yourself you were only going to eat two pieces of it, saving the third but you lacked the self control and ate it all. The burn in your stomach eased a little bit as the food settled, however the panic set in as you realised you were down to no food supplies. You tried to calm yourself down by familiarising yourself with the room. You would deal with your food problem after you had rested. You had been in here before but only to search for walkers.

You tried to tell from the decor who it belonged to. The walls were a pale pink colour and were covered in band posters and fairy lights that had been strung up. The batteries were long dead but you could imagine what the room looked like with them switched on. Looking closer, you saw photos taped to the wall in a heart shaped montage. The photos were of a young girl, maybe 16/17 with all of her friends, smiling and laughing. She had blue eyes as clear as swimming pools in July and long blonde windswept hair. You instantly felt a pang of sadness for this beautiful stranger as you realised you were standing in the remnants of this girl’s life. You made your way over to the dresser and caught a glimpse of yourself in the mirror, letting out a small gasp. Your hair was hanging loosely out of its braid and you noticed how long it had grown, well past your shoulders. Your cheekbones were sharper and your face looked hollow, devoid of any colour from your lack of food and rest. Your already pale complexion not doing you any favours. You took your hair down from it’s braid taking a moment to try and unwind all the knots. Your body desperately needed sleep and more food but you wanted to feel human again. You didn’t even recognise yourself. You opened the dresser drawer and searched around for a hairbush, finding moisturisers, hair products and perfumes and took the moment to rub some cream into your face, pretending for a brief moment that you were just a normal teenager in a normal world getting ready for school. You weren’t starving, lonely or tired, you were simply moisturising. Your skin tingled at the sensation, not used to being pampered after a year of a makeup less world. You kept searching for a brush when your hand touched smooth metal, it was a tin. You suddenly remembered your teenage years when you hid your diaries in your sock drawers and left little notes for the future you to find. This girl wouldn’t want a stranger snooping around in her things and you felt guilty for a moment, but she could have some hidden cigarettes or medical supplies. What you would give for a cigarette. You knew smoking was a horrible habit but it was your vice before all of this. Curiosity got the better of you and you hesitantly opened it, not believing what you had found. Tears of happiness threatened to spill over as your searched the small tin. It was packed full with chocolate, beef jerky, gummy candies and peanuts. You had found this strangers snack stash.

[wolfwhiteflowers]

Caryl and comic Carl & Sophia theory

So there’s been a theory that Caryl are like comic Carl and Sophia for awhile. I tried to find a post that was the first time it made me think of it, but I can’t find it. I think it was back in s10A and someone was arguing that Caryl are not like comic R & M but more like comic Carl & Sophia (Carlphia). I had made some parallel posts about it in my blog. It would be interesting if the writers are now trying to adapt Carlphia and comic Lydia in the 10C and s11. 

I hope I can explain this well and accurate. :P

First, there’s similarities with Caryl and Carlphia. Both ships are like life-long friends and kinda have this subtle slowburn love relationship going on since the start. Oh, they both are actually the last two surviving Atlanta members of TWD. (Comic MIchonne-prison, tv Michonne left). There’s also a thing with one of the Peletier girls living till the end or dying early on. Also, for awhile, I see Leah and it keeps reminding me of another L name in the show, Lydia. So, maybe it’s meant to be connected to comic Lydia. (Name thingies lol. Idk yet what Leah is like in s10c and s11 though.)

*I’ll explain comic Carl and Sophia story, if I remember. And some parallels ..including with Leah if she’s like comic Lydia.

 Carlphia were a couple for awhile when they’re young kids (kinda would make someone to ship them from the start/kinda like a main ship), but mostly were good friends that grew up together. They grew apart I guess when Maggie moved to Hilltop after Glenn died. Eventually, it’s when Carl wanted to be independent and be a blacksmith apprentice(?) in Hilltop. It’s there when teens Carl and Sophia started to be friends again. And also when Whisperer War arc begins and that’s when teen Carl mostly falls in love with Lydia. His first real girlfriend/love I would say.  I don’t remember much and comic Sophia wasn’t really featured in the comics a lot. I think during and after the Whisperer war, Carl and Sophia were doing usual teen things, and helping out communities and family. Carl was more independent and mature (compared to Sabastian) so Sophia would listen to him on some things. Like love and stuff. Sophia would be jealous that Carl would know what to do in life, and have a gf Lydia. Sometimes its like she’s jealous that’s she’s alone, or jealous and misses her friend Carl who was always with Lydia. I think Robert Kirkman did have some hints of a love triangle going on but we didn’t really see it much. (It’s like a most recent love triangle in the story) And then uh I think it’s mostly that Carl and Lydia were shown to be good relationship and Lydia support Carl to being a good young man/leader. Carl and Sophia were good friends too. Then during the Commonwealth arc, an issue before, Carl’s dad died. And then the 20 years time jump on the last long issue (chapter or episode.), we see adult Carl who’s married with Sophia and they have a daughter named Andrea. We see how Carl interacts with Sophia and Lydia. There’s a page of Carl and Lydia that explains kinda why he chose to be with Sophia instead of Lydia. Basically it’s like a trope that Lydia is from the past and was when life was about survival and death. When he’s with Sophia it’s like he’s about living and for the future. So, somewhere in those 20 years, he grew to wanting to live life and making a better world then into the ZA. So, in a way it’s a subtle parallel.

So if Caryl and Leah are to be like comic Carlphia and Lydia, then I can see some parallels. It would be really interesting to see that on the show and sweet because Caryl would be endgame. But, I’m not sure how this theory would play out. The show now since s9 became so different from the comics and the comics ended what would be very different for the show. We don’t have the same main characters now as the comics did. The show is ending with s11..but is it really the end of TWD story when Rick movies will continue(if everyone will be there too)? We’re gonna be into the Commonwealth arc, post Whisperer War, Negan redemption & Maggie arc, and different plots. Also the show sometimes do comic arcs a bit out of order.

 So sdlfjlsajf????? It’s hard to speculate the show now with the comics now. I don’t know how TWD show would end really. To end with Judith...there’s that 20 years time jump to see people in ZA living life like normal in modern times in, in the New World. But, there are other plots not done. Like Rick’s story and Michonne looking for him, and Caryl in their spinoff show. It’s all hard to speculate. 

Anyway, Idk how this Carlphia and Lydia theory would work. I guess the writers could not adapt some things like the last two issues or really alternate it in the show.  Yeah it’s hard to speculate and also s11 is a long season probably like 4 arcs they will do. So that’s a lot of guessing.

Another thing that’s hard is that the writers would put for an example comic Rick plots onto tv Aaron and then later different plot for Daryl. The writers would change characters to adapt comic plots in a season. So, Daryl is using some comic Rick plots and comic Carl’s because it’s usually for the main storyline and Daryl is leading in the show. (Even Carol had some comic Rick plots but she mostly had comic Michonne’s in the past.) Anyway we have Aaron who has a missing arm and long beard like comic Rick, and he might be into political things. I think he might be killed in the end of the show like comic Rick.😢 Daryl might switch up again to be like comic Carl to whenever writers want to explore/remix a plot. 

* So there, Daryl can be like comic Carl in s11 sometimes. We know Leah will be in s11 but Idk where is she from now. If she’s from Commonwealth, I would think she could be the Governor of Commonwealth, Pamela. I can see Daryl acting as comic Rick to Pamela and they can probably fight about the way of living their life in ZA while also being like comic Carl and Lydia. They could argue and maybe try to start their relationship again because of their past. They used to be a couple. During of this I could see Carol realizing her feelings and feel jealous of them like comic Sophia. Idk what else Carol could do in s11. She could probably be like comic Michonne or Magna to be opinionated on the whole politics of Commonwealth and help Daryl. And to end the season, Idk, they could have Judith feel like she’s safe in Commonwealth, or ASZ is at peace with other communities and let Caryl go travel together. Or, Rick and/or Michonne reunite with their kids and warn about CRM community (Rick movie). Somewhere in s11B, Daryl realizes he doesn’t want to be with Leah. It’s always been Carol for him. And then Caryl became canon/endgame and left ASZ to travel. I think that’s what would be like comic Carlphia and Lydia theory.  @carylmeanslove here's a post with my speculations

[superprincesspea]

The Honey House, Chapter 21

Breakfast

MASTERLIST

Negan rolled over in the bed, his voice thick with sleep as he mumbled “wrap me up in those long legs baby doll.”

Rae pressed herself against the warmth of him, happy to oblige as he eased her leg around his waist and her cheek found a home on his shoulder. She liked being the big spoon, squeezing Negan tight and hiding under the covers as a new day crept into the room. It was the morning after the night before and it felt good, better than she’d expected.

She brushed her fingertips through the soft hair of his chest, letting her breathing fall in sync with the rise and fall of Negan’s body. It was like any lazy Sunday with a new boyfriend, the only thing missing was breakfast in bed and a broadsheet she could pretend to be interested in while the radio hummed in the background.

“You hungry baby?” he said, as if reading her mind but more likely hearing the gurgling of her stomach. Last night Negan’s body had seemed to satisfy her every craving, this morning she needed fuel for that fire that had burned for him.

“Starving,” her teeth grazed his shoulder like she might eat him up and he moaned happily at the attention before rolling over to face her.

He made sure to keep her legs wrapped around him as he claimed a space for himself on her pillow, his face kissing distance to hers. “I could go for some bacon and eggs, coffee and bagels. What about you Red?”

Rae’s stomach rumbled even harder, she didn’t realise how much she missed the salt and grease until right now, “don’t tease me… I can’t remember the last time I had bacon.”

Negan’s grin slipped across his face, “that's so? Well, if you behave yourself Miss Honey I might think about bringing you some next time.”

Her mouth watered, her enthusiasm peaked, “you have bacon and you’re only telling me this now?”

“I have whatever the fuck you want baby doll,” he murmured as his lips devoured hers, his hand cupping her ass to bring her closer to him.

“Whatever I want?” she asked, brushing her nose along his while his erection pushed against her thigh.

“Anything,” Negan’s breathing deepened, curling hot on her neck as his kisses trailed to her collarbone while his hand ventured with an insatiable appetite of its own.

Rae’s stomach grumbled in protest and she laughed, batting his advances away and pulling the quilt all the way up to her chin with a mischievous smile, “what about the food in the car?”

“That your game Red?” he tickled her side, “get a man all worked up then ask him to run out in the goddamn cold to fetch you breakfast?”

“You got yourself worked up,” she teased, nestling further into the quilt. If he went to the car then he was a keeper, if not, then he was still great in bed.

Negan’s eyes crinkled at the corners and he scratched his beard like a dog with fleas before planting a sloppy kiss on her forehead and rolling out from the bed. He stood by the door without a stitch of clothing on his body as he stretched his arms out as lazy as a big cat with a yawn to match. She rolled onto her side, tangling her legs in the sheet, enjoying the view as he bent over to pick up his boxers and slide them over his ass with the twang of elastic slapping against his waist. With a boyish laugh he grabbed the fluffy pink robe from the peg on the back of her door and slipped it on like the most natural thing in the world.

“Don’t think about moving a muscle from that bed,” he warned with a grin before ducking out of the door.

When she heard the door close, his footfalls down the hall stairs then the outside door slamming behind him she allowed herself to squeal, kicking her legs in the sheets like a crazy woman before jumping out of bed. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d felt like this, like she wanted to call her best friend and recount every detail of last night over a cup of coffee or a cocktail. She had no idea what had happened to her friends from her old life and the ones she had now were more interested in what supplies she’d found how much ammo was left in the stores.

She threw open the bedroom curtains and sat on the window sill like she’d done a hundred times before. Only instead of watching the world go by she watched Negan hurrying towards the car with barefeet and her robe. It suited him, she liked him like this. She liked herself like this, even with Jacob it had never been this relaxed, this normal feeling. It had always been frantic, pushed against a tree, two people desperate to feel anything at all. This didn’t feel desperate or rushed, it felt like forever.

Rae waited at the window until he was returning, his arms loaded with options and his smile devilish when he spotted her watching him, her nipples hard buds in the cold, her body completely bare at the windowpane.

“I told you to wait in bed,” he threw the snacks onto the nightstand, “you disobeying me woman? You know how that makes my palm as itchy as fuck.”

Her jaw dropped, her eyes widened and a tingle of excitement crept across her skin, “you wouldn’t dare.”

But of course he would.

///

All morning Negan couldn’t keep his hands off Rae. He didn’t want a inch of her to go untouched. She made him feel twenty years younger and a newlywed to boot and he’d been newlywed more times than he cared to think about. But not like this. He wanted to eat her with a spoon until he burst then he wanted to put all the pieces back together and burst again but no matter what either of them wanted even honeymoons had to end. It was already long past noon on day two of what should have been a couple of hours worth of scavenging.

“Grandma will skin us alive if we don’t go back,” Rae insisted, attempting to slip from the bed. He pulled her back, plastering her back against his front in a bear hug until she sagged against him in surrender.

“Then let's not go back.” Negan laughed it off like a joke but part of him meant it when he said, “runaway with me Red.”

She nestled the back of her head against his chest, her voice light with opportunity, “where would we run?”

“Somewhere hot,” he kissed the point where her shoulder curved into her neck, “with a nice beach. How’s that sound?”

Rae tilted her head to look at him, her lips quirking into a smile, “I burn like a lobster in the sun.”

He chuckled, his hand splaying across her stomach and all that alabaster skin, “then let's go to Alaska.”

Negan practically felt her shiver as she escaped from his hands, covering her arms across her chest with a “brrr… too cold.”

He hated the cold too, he liked a temperature where nobody had to wear clothes unless absolutely fucking necessary. He smiled to himself watching Rae pull on her bra like a strip tease in reverse as he quietly played out the fantasy of them just leaving the world behind with nothing but a sports car, a box of food and each other. “What about a national park, somewhere not too hot and not too fucking cold, how does that suit your majesty? We can be forest people.”

She raised one eyebrow, her jeans smoothing over her legs as she laughed at him, “and what exactly do you know about surviving in the forest?”

Truth was he knew very little, but he knew he could make it with Red if they had to. She was feisty, strong and that's what he loved about her. Loved, as soon as the word crossed his head it sounded off like an overbearing klaxon. His chest was tight, his face froze in a look that was probably half shock and half terror but his body snapped into action reaching for his own clothes, thrusting his feet through his jeans like he needed the protection.

Rae snorted, “I’ll take your silence to mean you don’t know a single thing about living in a forest.”

He buttoned his shirt, “you’re right, it was a stupid idea.”

Her smile faded a little, her arm brushing past him and reaching for her glock before holstering it in her belt. He watched every second of it, his heart pounding, before her eyes locked with his, “it’s not stupid. I think about running away all the time. It’s my guilty secret…” she laughed quietly, “one of them.”

Negan didn’t say anything. He stood as still as a fucking statue but his blood was pounding, his palms sweaty.

This wasn’t love. It was great sex. Great sex with a great girl when he hadn’t had either in a long time. Jesus fucking christ, run away with her, what the holy hell was he thinking?

Of course he knew exactly what he was thinking as she ran her fingers through her hair pulling it into a ponytail. He’d be fucked if he could keep his eyes off her for one goddamned second and fucked if he kept on watching.

“Actually,” she said like nothing had changed in the past two minutes, “I’ve been thinking about setting up this town like I wanted to before. With Jacob gone, there’s no reason not to. There’s plenty of room-”

Negan’s laugh was as loud as it was nervous, “I know I’m fucking awesome in the sack but let's not jump straight to fucking living together. Jesus fucking christ Red, you don’t need to tie me down and brand my ass.”

“Don’t flatter yourself!” Rae bit back with her fiery temper, her cheeks pink, “I’m not the kinda girl to go all goo goo eyes because we had one night.”

Negan held up his hands. He’d be lying if he said it didn’t hurt, at least his pride if nothing else. He laughed it off, “but it was some damn good sex.”

Her tempered simmered just a touch, enough to leave her with a smile at the ready but her eyes still sharp and so fucking green.

“What kind of girl are you Red?”

She rolled the idea around in her head. “I’m the kinda girl who liked sleeping in my own bed last night.”

She picked up the quilt, flipping it through the air where it spread out before settling over every corner of the mattress to erase any sign it had ever been slept in, or fucked all over. As she fluffed the pillows back into place she had a wry laugh, “you know, I share a bedroom with Grandma and Zuzu back home.”

“Jesus. Grandma and the kid?” Talk about a fucking cock block. Even if he wasn't sure about shacking up with Red, he was pretty damn sure he didn’t want to share a room with all three Honey’s. “You want this town baby just tell me whatever the fuck you need me to do and it's yours.”

She pressed her lips to his jaw, “you don’t need to do anything. This is my town, my people. And if you wanna move in then... I guess you’ll have to ask nicely.”

He cupped her cheek, what the hell had this woman done to him? Part of him knew it was time to walk away before he got any deeper, the other part refused to even remember he could walk. “I don’t ask nicely for any-fucking-thing.”

“When you want something bad enough you might have to learn to be nice.”

“I already got you, so I don’t have to be nice to any other fucker.” He kissed her, his tongue sinking into her mouth claiming his own defeat.

When they finally pulled into the match stick fort it was almost dark. Negan noticed Tim playing catch with Zuzu and using Negan's glove. That fucker. He fumbled the ball when he saw Rae, dropping it between his sneakers and never taking his eyes off her while he crouched down to pick it up.

If she had noticed the look Timmy was giving her then she did a good job of pretending she hadn’t. She called out for a couple of her people to help unload the car, leaving Negan to stand like a spare part with murder eyes directed to the fucker.

“You staying for supper?” Grandma Ellie’s voice almost made him jump but he kept his shit together, glancing her way with his smile at full grin before he caught the hard stare she was cutting him down with.

His grin faded, “was that an offer or a threat Grandma?”

Her hand rested in her hip, her shoulders squared with indignation, “you kept my child outside all night and I don’t appreciate that!”

Negan might have laughed if his throat wasn’t so damn dry, it reminded him of the time he was caught with his pants around his ankles in his girlfriend's bedroom when they were teenagers. “With all due respect sweetheart, your Granddaughter is a grown woman.”

“You remind me of my late husband,” she said in a way that let him know it wasn’t a good thing, “I hope you prove me wrong.” With no more explanation she turned on her heel, heading back inside with Zuzu chasing hot on her heels. Timmy was lurking behind to stand by the porch steps like a guard dog with the sniff of a crook.

Whatever Grandma thought he might have done he’d probably done far worse.

He spotted Rae heading right for him and he couldn’t ignore the fact that he had five wives back home. If Rae knew the truth… he couldn’t let it get that far.

“That should keep us going for an extra few days,” she smiled, slamming the hood of the trunk.

Negan grabbed Lucille from the footwell where she’d spent the entire night while he was with Rae, “I gotta go home baby.”

“But…” her eyes searched his, probably wondering why he was leaving like she’d done something wrong, “it's getting dark.”

He pressed his lips to her forehead, breathing her in before he let her go, “I know but I gotta get back.”

Rae sucked her bottom lip, her hand resting on her gun as her gaze drifted to his chest instead of his eyes.  Negan wondered what she would have said if he’d found the balls to tell her the truth, he wondered if it would have meant he could stay the night here and as many nights as he wanted to. Mostly he wondered how the hell she’d managed to bring him to this, to be a man standing with a woman and feeling something except completely fucking empty.

“Is it gonna be another month before I see you?” she said.

“I didn’t plan on that Red, shit happened. I’ll be back in a week. I promise. Just don’t

do anything stupid and remember my men are just over the field for whatever the fuck you need.”

“Okay,” her face was a little crestfallen and he reached for her hand, holding it in his before kissing the very tips of her fingers before letting them slide away.  He couldn’t ignore it any longer, he couldn’t keep putting things off, if he wanted Rae then he had to do something about his wives. Fucking hell, he had to do something about a lot of things but his wives would be first. Whether he liked it or not, whether he fucking wanted it or not, things had changed.

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[trashcanband4]

Therapy Sessions Ch. 2

Chapter 1

Pairing: NeganxOc. Setting: The Sanctuary. Warnings: None other than Negan being OOC. Summary: Negan begins attempting to get to know the OC (Kelly.).

The next day she woke up to an empty bed and a note left on the dining table. As she picked it up she read aloud, “You are to stay here until I return. Make yourself at home but touch my stash of food and you will be sorry.” She scoffed and tossed the note back on the table.

“Right, so what am I supposed to do here all day?” As she looked around the room she spotted a few books, a small stereo and some CD’s on a shelf sitting to the right of the door, but none of them peaked her interest. Finally she popped a cd into the stereo and started working out.

She had just finished doing cool down stretches when Negan walked in. Lucille propped up on his shoulder. “Good morning.” Negan told her seeing that she wasn’t still in bed like he expected she’d be given the events of the previous night and how late they went to sleep. If he had the chance to sleep in he’d definitely take it, but he had a community to run.

“Mornin’.” She answered as she sat down on the foot of the bed, leaving the dining chairs at the table for Negan. He walked into the room and leaned the sparkling clean Lucille against the bookshelf by the door then sat down in the dining chair crossing his legs at the knees.

“So what’s in store for me today?” she asked bringing her socked feet up onto the bed to sit cross-legged.

“You and I have the rest of the day together and I intend on spending every second of it picking at your dead little soul.” He replied as he sat down in the armchair.

“Why?” she asked, emotionlessly, as usual.

“Because what’s dead doesn’t stay dead these days.” He replied with a cocky smile.

“You think you can bring me back to life?” she asked, her voice turning hard as she crossed her arms over her chest. She wanted to tell him that the walls she had built up, walls constructed from the fallen bodies of her loved ones, were impossible to tear down. However she kept her mouth shut, because telling him that would be letting him in and that wasn’t going to happen.

“I’m going to try.” He answered finding it ironic that while he was going to attempt to fix her, Daryl was being held in a tiny room in which Negan intended on breaking the man.

“Good luck with that.” She shrugged and dropped her arms from across her chest.

“Tell me about who you were before the world got flushed down the shitter.” He told her as he uncrossed his legs and leaned forward placing his elbows on his knees.

“And if I don’t want to?” she asked flatly.

“Then I’ll ask you to tell me what you did for a living.” He countered.

“And if I say that I don’t want to answer that question either?” she asked already getting tired of him and his pointless questions.

“Then I’ll tell you that I am being very generous keeping you in here with me. I could easily put you in the room next to Daryl’s where you can listen to him screaming and crying as fucking Easy Street play’s on loop and you will be fed the same shitty as fuck dog food sandwiches as him.” He told her as his face turned cold and his eyes glaring.

She sighed and crossed her arms over her chest again. “Fine, before the dead came back to eat the living, I was a wife and mother. I was chasing two kids around a three bedroom house, changing diapers and getting baby food thrown in my face. My husband worked two jobs to make ends meet. Things were hard, but I wouldn’t and couldn’t have asked for a better family.”

“Do you have children back at Alexandria?” he asked and she simply shook her head no. “What happened to them?”

“Near the beginning my youngest was taken from me by a virus that spread through our community like wildfire. We didn’t have the resources to handle it. The poor baby didn’t stand a chance. He’d always had a weak immune system. He was three.” She answered not looking at Negan, but at her hands in her lap as she picked at her cuticles. “My oldest, was taken from me by some ass holes that called themselves the wolves. I was helping stock the pantry and my husband was out on a supply run when they attacked. She was home alone. The wolves slit her throat.” She glanced up at Negan then back down to her hands. “She was nine.”

“So is that when you started shutting down?” he asked quietly.

“No, I felt every single bit of that shit.” She answered honestly.

“You mentioned a husband. He dead now?” Negan pressed.

“After we lost our son things between us became…strained. We only stayed together because of our daughter. So when we lost her-” she cut herself off not wanting to elaborate too much. “Let’s just say things got really, really ugly. He eventually left the community. I don’t know where he went and I don’t care to.” The whole time she answered his questions her voice stayed the same, flat, uncaring tone as usual.

“Damn… that all sucks.” he sighed and rubbed at his chin.

“The world sucks now.” She shrugged one shoulder.

“You’re not wrong about that.” He replied as he leaned back in the chair again and brought his booted foot up to rest on his knee.“Let’s lighten things up a bit.” He said and Kelly stopped picking at her cuticles. “Coffee or tea?”

“French Vanilla chai tea.” She answered quickly.

“I’m a black coffee guy myself. What TV shows were you into before?” he told her information about himself even though she didn’t ask.

“The Big Bang Theory, South Park and as embarrassing as it is to admit, The Bold and The Beautiful.” She answered.

“The Bold and The Beautiful was that shitty soap opera right?” he asked and she nodded. “I wasn’t much into tv myself. Did you have a celebrity crush?” He picked up a baseball that was on the floor next to the dining chair and started tossing it in the air and catching it.

“It was always a tie between Channing Tatum and Jensen Ackels.” She answered and for the first time Negan heard what he thought was a smile in her voice.

“Seriously, Jensen Ackles?” he asked as he stopped tossing the ball and cocked a brow at her.

“Hey, dude was hot as hell.” She argued with a small smile that was no where near reaching her eyes, but it was a start. “Just saying.”

“You know Lucille used to tell me that Jensen reminded her of me what I was younger.” He commented quirking Kelly’s interest for the first time.

“You’re bat talks to you?” she asked and he knew she meant it sarcastically but the tone wasn’t there.

“Lucille was my wife. My real wife… before all of this.” He explained and Kelly just made an “Ah” face. “Dog or Cat?” he asked going back to this or that questions.

“Dog, you?” she asked figuring that if he was going to get to know her and keep her in his room for the foreseeable future, she should start getting to know him too.

“Dog. Cats are too fuckin’ moody.” He replied. “Toast or eggs?”

“Eggs.” She answered then motioned for him to answer. He smirked a little, thinking it a good thing that she wanted him to answer his questions too.

“Toast.” Negan answered than asked, “Cardio or Weights?”

“Cardio. Stamina matters these days.” She answered.

“Weights.” He smirked again.

“Cake or pie?”

“Neither. I don’t do sweets.” She answered.

“What’s the matter with you? Sweets are what make life worth living.” He asked dramatically with a shake of his head.

“I’ve never had a sweet tooth. Even as I kid I didn’t eat a lot of candy.” She said with a shrug.

“So what did you do on your birthday, stick candles in a pot roast?” he asked and she cracked the smallest of smiles.

“I had a cake, I just didn’t eat it.” she answered as she dropped her feet to hang off of the side of the bed, not quite touching the floor. “What about you, cake or pie?”

“Classic apple pie with the sugared lattice on top.” He answered. “So you don’t eat sweets at all, none, ever?” he asked stuck on the sweets thing.

She sighed and tilted her head back, people always had this reaction when she told them that she never ate chewy or hard candies or cake or cookies. “I will eat mint chocolate chip ice cream every other blue moon, but that’s it.”

“Mint chocolate chip? Out of all the awesome ice cream flavors you chose the most disgusting one.”

Kelly just rolled her eyes at him. “Okay so out of all the awesome ice cream flavors what’s your favorite Mr. Judgmental?” she asked sarcastically.

“Butter pecan all the way baby.” He answered with a shit eating grin that showed off his dimples and perfect teeth.

“Now that’s disgusting.” She said with a point at him. “Bath or shower?” she flipped things around and asked him a question. He didn’t seem to notice, too caught up in the conversation.

“Shower.” He answered.

“Same, I never understood how someone could soak in a soup of their own filth.” She added and he smiled at her, thinking the same thing. “Hamburger or taco?”

“Hamburger.” He answered without missing a beat.

“Yeah you look like a hamburger guy.” She said giving him an appraising gaze.

“Let me guess, tacos?” he asked and she nodded. “Most important quality in a partner, Intelligence or sense of humor?”

“Why can’t I have both?” she asked and he shook his head at her. “Fine, sense of humor.”

“Intelligence.” He answered “Cups in the cupboard right side up or up side down?”

“Up side down. It’s more stable and causes fewer chips.” She answered. “Toilet paper on the dispenser facing up or down?”

“Down, what kind of psycho puts it on facing up?” he asked with a smile.

“My ex-husband. It drove me absolutely batty. That and leaving his socks right next to the laundry basket instead of in it.” She said getting more rapped up in the conversation than she had meant to.

“Well, as you can see I’m a pretty tidy guy so we should get along just fine.” His statement brought her back down to earth, remembering that she was once again going to be sharing a bed with this man. A man she hardly knew anything about. Noticing her sudden silence and her eyes that stared down at the floor he stood up from the chair and moved to sit next to her, a few inches of space between them. “What are you thinkin’ about, Dead Girl?” he asked as he bumped his shoulder against hers as if they had been friends for years.

“I…am… thinking about how I don’t think you’re going to be able to…fix, me. I know I’m fucked up. I watched you turn two men’s head into tomato soup and yet I still have no problem sharing a bed with you. A normal person, someone in their right mind, wouldn’t have willingly climbed into your truck, slept in your bed, or be sitting here with you like you couldn’t be the literal death of me.” She finally looked across her shoulder at his bright hazels looking at her as he listening closely. “If you can’t fix me will you at least make my death quick and painless?”

“I’m not going to kill you, darlin’. I refuse to except that you are un-repairable.” He replied.

She sighed and fell backwards onto the bed. “I hate this, you making me remember my past, trying to get into my head…”

“Well,” he started as he turned around and threw one of his legs over hers, straddling her, “there could be perks for both of us.”

She bit her lip as she placed her hands on his chest then slid them up to rest on each side of his neck, making him smirk cockily. “You can get into my head, or you can get into my pants. You can’t have both.” She patted him on the shoulder then slid down off of the bed, her nose brushing the crotch of his pants as she did. “Sorry Charlie.” She said as she stood up then turned to face him.

“Okay, then I’ll ask you some more questions.” He said as she moved around to sit in the middle of the bed.

“God, you’re borning.” She groaned then sat down in the dining chair to answer more pointless, boring questions.

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[trashcanband4]

Therapy Sessions Ch. 4

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3

Pairing: Negan x oc (Kelly). Setting: The sanctuary. Warnings: ooc Negan. Word Count: 6,525

When Negan came back to her the next morning, instead of finding her awake and done with breakfast like usual, he found her still in bed. The covers were pulled up over her head to shade her face from the light coming in through the windows. He wanted to jerk the covers down and jolt her awake, but decided against it and sat down on the side of the bed and rubbed her shoulder. Kelly just grunted and turned away from him. “Come on, darlin’, time to get up. I didn’t bring you breakfast for it to go to waste.”

Kelly sighed and turned onto her back as she pushed the blanket down and glared at him. “Why do I find your voice so grating?” she asked, her voice raspy with sleep.

“You can get out of bed willingly or I can make you.” he told her with a smirk. She just rolled her eyes and turned away from him. So, he wrapped his arms around her and threw her over his shoulder, stood up then sat her on her feet and tossed the blanket back on the bed.

“Seriously?” she asked as she pushed her brown waves out of her face. “What does a girl have to do to be allowed to sleep in around here?”

"Be deathly ill, which you are not." Negan answered then pointed to the plate of food. "Eat."

"Sir, yes, Sir." She sighed sarcastically and sat down at the table eating her breakfast.

"I have to go." Negan told her as he walked over to the door and grabbed Lucille. "Don't go back to sleep."

"No promises." She mumbled around a bite of scrambled egg.

"Exercise. It releases endorphins and will help you feel better." He advised and she shot a look up at him through her lashes. He tossed Lucille over his shoulder then left the room.

She was sitting at the table drumming her fingers on it in boredom when Negan walked in and propped Lucille up by the door then plopped down in the dining chair across from her. "Hard day?"

"Long day." He corrected. "Have you had dinner?" He asked and she nodded yes.

"Good. So have I and I'm ready for bed." He stood up and started taking off his jacket.

"I know you're tired," Kelly started and Negan looked at her out of the corners of his eyes, "but sleeping in pants has been really uncomfortable. Is there any way I can get a pair of sleep shorts or something?"

Negan walked over to his dresser, grabbed a pair of soft cotton navy blue boxers, made sure there was a button on the crotch then opened up another drawer and grabbed a long sleeved white shirt. "Will these work for now?" He asked as he handed them to her.

"I didn't mean you had to solve the problem tonight." She told him as she walked over and took them from him. "But yes, they will, thank you."

She expected him to turn his back, but instead he just raised a brow with a cheeky smile. Not breaking eye contact with him she pulled the white long sleeved shirt over her head and pulled it down, took her arms out of the sleeves of the shirt she was already wearing and pushed it up around her neck then put her arms through the long sleeves of the exterior shirt. Impressed, Negan watched her grab the underlying shirt that was bunched up around her neck, pull it over her head and toss it into the dirty clothes hamper in the corner.

Since Negan was bigger than her his shirt was like a dress on her so she was easily able to slip off her pants and replace them with the boxer shorts without showing anything. "Touche."

After he slid in beside her under his own covers minutes of silence passed, both of them knowing that the other wasn't asleep. “So tell me about you and Markus. You said things got really ugly between the two of you?” Negan struck up a conversation.

“Yeah, after we lost our daughter.” She answered.

“Darcy?” he asked.

She nodded then remembered that he couldn’t see her in the dark room. “Yeah, after we lost Darcy we really started drifting apart. We didn’t talk about stuff. He refused to talk about Darcy. We’d sleep in the same bed, but it was like we were miles and miles away from each other. I was grieving, we both were, but we couldn’t do it together, he wouldn’t let us do it together. So…I…turned to someone else for comfort.”

“Daryl.” Negan added quietly, making her brows draw together.

“How’d you know?” she asked, looking at him, only seeing the outline of him in the dark.

“Pieces weren’t hard to put together. Plus I noticed that Markus seems to hold a personal grudge against Daryl.” He answered. “Did you fuck him?”

“No.” Kelly answered and turned her eyes to the black ceiling. “Daryl was just there for me when I needed him. He and I were sitting on the porch swing. I was crying and Daryl hugged me and wiped my tears.”

“Aww.” Negan cooed.

“Yeah well, Markus saw us through the window of our house across the street and assumed we were kissing.” She said with a bit of anger in her words. “Even though I told him a thousand times that we weren’t making out, still suddenly I became a whore, a slut, a cheating cunt… So when he yelled these things at me so much that I finally snapped and threw a snow globe at his head I became a psycho bitch. From then on out it was his favorite thing to call me. After that the bitterness grew. He started making up things that didn’t even happen, like I wasn’t at the house with Darcy because I was off screwing Daryl. Or I didn’t give a shit about Darcy all I cared about was Daryl. Everything got blamed on me and Daryl when nothing ever even happened between us.”

“Well, all of that makes sense. Markus was pretty mad at the world when he ended up here. But he calmed down when-”

“I don’t care.” She interrupted him. “I don’t care who he is now, what he does for you or even if he’s found someone else."

“Okay, understood.” His gravelly voice whispered. “Goodnight, Dead Girl.”

“Goodnight, Negan.” She whispered back and soon, both of them slipped off to sleep.

The next morning as she slowly woke up she started to realize that something was different. Scent was the first sense to awaken and the masculine fragrance of sandalwood and cinnamon invaded her nose. Her half asleep brain thought that maybe Negan had lit a candle before he left. But then her sense of touch woke and she realized that a heavy arm was thrown over her waist and a warm body was pressed into her back. That's when her ears joined the party and the quiet soothing snores she recognized as Negan's hit her. As she opened her eyes she saw that her blanket was gone and she lay under Negan’s.

"How the hell did this happen?" She thought to herself. "Why is he still here?" She thought and when she tried to slide out from under his arm it just gripped her tighter. So she decided that the best thing to do was to just try to go back to sleep. That way if she did fall asleep it would be Negan’s move, not hers.

She didn’t go back to sleep and instead laid there hoping with everything in her that Negan would wake up soon and let go of her. His warm hand was pressed into her flat stomach and she tried to not even think about the long hardness that was pressed into her rear. She couldn’t decide if she loved or hated the intense sensations his touch, even over her clothes, was sending through her body.

Finally, Negan’s breathing started to change and she felt his body reacting to their position as he woke up. First his arm tightened around her then the hardness grew harder making her squeeze her eyes shut and bite her lip to keep from having an audible reaction. Soon his hand on her shirt covered stomach slid up between her breasts then down to rest on her arm. Warm breath skimmed her neck as he brushed his nose along the soft skin. She had been hoping he would move away when he realized how they had been sleeping, but he was doing the opposite.

No doubt he was trying to get a rise out of her, but instead of giving him what he wanted, what she so badly wanted to give in to, she simply took in a deep breath as one would do when bothered in their sleep and rolled over to lie on her stomach. She was surprised when he actually let her and even further so when he brushed her sleep mussed hair out of her face, slipped the backs of his fingers down her cheek then rested his fingers on her neck as he caressed her cheek with his thumb.

Unable to resist, a content sigh left her nose as her eyes opened, instantly finding Negan's hazels that seemed to be taking in every feature and detail of her face. When they met hers he gave her a sleepy version of his signature dimpled smirk and a small sleepy smile flashed so quickly on her lips he almost missed it. "Was that a smile, Dead Girl?" His voice was normally a little on the gravelly side, first thing in the morning it was even more so and it only added to the sensations his touch was sending through her. In response she simply looked down at his hand on her face then back up at his eyes, giving him a little squint of hers that almost dared him to do more.

Not one to turn down a challenge, but at the same time not wanting to push her too far, Negan simply slid his hand down her neck, over her shoulder, down her arm to grip her hip before slipping his hand under the shirt to grip the curve of her waist and pull her closer. Now, with just inches between them, she could smell the warm spicy scent of him again. It, combined with the feel of his hand caressing the bare skin of her back, had her light headed, as if she'd drunk just enough alcohol to get buzzed.

Her hand took on a mind of its own as she lifted it and placed it on his chest, slipping her fingers through his chest hair. Testing and tempting her, he brushed her nose with his, drawing her eyes from his chest back up to his. She didn't pull away. So slowly, giving her all the time in the world to pull back and say no, he moved his lips closer and closer to hers. Their lips had just barely brushed when a pounding came from the other side of the bedroom door. The unexpected sound made her jump and pull away from him.

Negan growled as he took his hand off of her, threw the covers to the side, stood up then padded over to the door. "What the fucking fuck are you banging on my door for?" Negan practically yelled at whoever was on the other side.

"Its 11 o'clock and no one has seen you. We were worried that your psycho hostage had murdered you in your sleep." She recognized Markus's voice right off the bat.

Hearing him call her a psycho she snapped. With more speed than she used in a long time she hopped out of bed and stomped over to the door. Seeing the fury in her eyes Negan stepped out of the way. Half a second later the back of her hand collided with the side of Marcus's right cheek so hard he fell, catching himself with the door frame to stay on his feet.

Negan looked between them with raised brows, eagerly waiting to find out what Markus was going to say to his ex-wife. "K-Kelly?" He asked, blinking at her in confusion as she glared up at him. "You're the psy-"

"Call me a psycho one more time and I swear to fucking christ I’ll break your fucking neck and never think twice about it." She warned.

Marcus looked to Negan. "Boss, you gonna let her talk to me like that?"

"Yeah." Negan answered with a smile.. "Because after all the shit she's told me you'll be fucking lucky if you only get the iron." Negan said coldly as he placed his hand on Kelly’s stomach and pushed her back as he moved to stand in front of her. Markus’s eyes got big as he looked at Kelly where she stood off to the side of Negan. “You want to know what I learned last night?” Negan asked and Markus turned his big blue eyes to Negan as he shook his head no. “That you failed to tell me that Alexandria existed. A secret that cost me a whole fucking outpost of people!" Even Kelly flinched at Negan’s raised voice. Negan look at the second man standing behind Markus that Kelly hadn't even realized was there, "Get him out of my fucking sight before I fucking gut him right here and now."

Markus made a fast retreat and Negan slammed the door. Kelly didn’t look at him, knowing she probably made things harder for Negan. Because of her Markus was going to get the iron, whatever that meant, and Negan was going to lose the trust in one of his men.

When Kelly didn’t say anything, Negan turned to her. His anger hardened face softened as he looked into her eyes. "Well, this has been an eventful morning." He sighed and sat down on the foot of the bed.

Kelly ignored his statement and moved to her side of the bed where she grabbed her covers off of the floor. As she folded it she took in his bare torso and the tattoos and freckles that peppered his skin. "What's the iron?"

"You'll see." He answered as he glanced over at her, catching the way she was observing him. He didn’t say anything, just smirked at her.

“So you’re letting me out of this room?” she asked not getting her hopes up, she might have misunderstood him.

“Those fuck me eyes you keep giving me and the pure rage I saw right before you slapped Markus was enough to earn you the privilege of seeing the show later." He wasn't going to mention that if she showed any emotion later it would earn her even more. She watched as he pulled on a white long sleeved shirt like the one she still wore then turned her back as he switched his pajama pants for a pair of dark pants and a belt. "I want you to get dressed, fix your hair and put on some of that makeup I brought you." He told her as he shrugged on his jacket.

She nodded at him as he walked out of the door. With him gone she got dressed then tidied up the room. She was putting his clothes she’d borrowed in a basket when a man walked in with a tray of apple and orange slices and a neatly folded stack of clothes. "Negan requests you wear these today." He told her and she watched silently as he sat the tray and a stack of clothes on the table then walked out. So she grabbed a piece of fruit and popped it in her mouth as she sat down and pulled the notebook and pen out of the bag that Negan had given her.

“Dear Diary,” she started, then stopped to pop another piece of fruit in her mouth. “I thought I liked it here at the sanctuary. For some reason Negan is treating me better than everyone else, and I like it, but last night I learned that Markus has been here the whole time he’s been gone from Alexandria. I liked it here because I had no ties to anyone other than Daryl who’s being held in a cell away from everyone. Now things are getting complicated. I’m starting to feel again. For the first time since Markus walked out I don’t feel numb. All I feel is hatred for him. The man I once loved more than anything else in the world, I now hate more than the walkers that plague the world.” She paused to eat a little more then picked the pen back up and skipped a line. “Then there’s Negan. I’ve thought he was attractive from the get go, but now I can’t stop looking at him and sometimes, all I want to do is jump his bones. I shouldn’t want him… He murdered Glenn and Abraham in cold blood. Strangely I get why he did it. We murdered a whole slew of his people and he only took two of ours. He probably would’ve only killed Abraham if Daryl hadn’t punched him. I don’t blame Daryl, he was just reacting to what was going on around him and he didn’t know that it would cause Negan to murder Glenn. I can see why Negan runs things the way he does. People can be stupid and fear is the only thing that can get through to some of them. Fear is the only thing that can control people.”

She skipped a line then continued writing. “Negan, for some reason, has decided to help me, I didn’t think it would work, I didn’t think I could care about anything ever again. But he is slowly breaking down my walls and I don’t know what to do. How do I let him help me and not fall for him? He has wives for god’s sake. He is a leader and a dangerous one at that. Getting even more involved with him could be dangerous for not only myself but the others back at Alexandria. I thought I didn’t care about them, but I do. I don’t want anyone to die, but Rick isn’t going to just go with how Negan runs things and he will get people killed.” She signed off on the entry and closed the book.

After finishing breakfast she braided her hair into two French braids that hung on each side of her shoulders then smudged on some eyeliner, coated her lashes in mascara then added a touch of the tinted lip balm. She had dressed in the new clothes and was putting away her things when Negan walked in. He gave her an appraising gaze taking in the black pencil skirt, black wedge heels, and red, sheer lace long sleeved shirt that she wore over a black camisole. The smirk he gave her caused a blush to color her cheeks as she placed her hand on her opposite arm self-consciously. He shut the door and closed the space between them and looked down at her with lust veiled eyes. She noticed them slip down to her soft lips, taking in the tiny glitter in the glossy balm. "That lip gloss have a flavor?" he asked, his voice quiet and gravelly.

She licked her lips making him bite his bottom one. "Vanilla."

"Good to know." He told her then backed up and opened the door. "You ready to get out of this room for a little while?"

She nodded and walked over to him where he motioned for her to walk ahead of him. So she did then let him lead her to a big room where they both stood on a platform above the people. After banging Lucille on the yellow bars people kneeled. “Do I kneel or stand?” she asked Negan quietly.

“You can stand, Sweetheart.” Negan told her, not whispering back. She turned her eyes to Markus who was tied to a chair in the middle of the room, next to a lit fire pit. “I just gave a speech about this shit last week.” Negan spoke loudly to the crowd. “I did not want to have to do this again.” He said as he started walking to the stairs and not knowing if she should follow she stayed behind. “But people keep breaking the rules. And again, why do we have rules?” Negan yelled.

“The rules keep us alive.” The crowd echoed back.

“That’s right. We survive, we provide security to others, we bring civilization back to this world. We are the saviors. But we can’t do that without rules. Rules are what make it all work.” Negan stopped on the stairs. “I know it’s not easy, but there is always work and there is always a cost. Here, if you try to skirt it! If you try to cut that corner!” Negan paused to laugh. “Then it is the iron for you.” Negan paused and let it all sink in before he said, “On your feet.” And everyone stood as Negan walked down the stairs.

As Kelly scanned the room she noticed a small group of women, dressed in fancy black clothing and heels with their hair done to match their upscale style. They were all giving her death glares. She assumed them to be Negan's wives.

"Kelly." Negan's voice drew her attention to him where he stood across from Markus. "Join me please." She walked down the stairs, hoping she wouldn't fall on her face considering it had been years since she'd worn heels. When she got close to her he wrapped his arm around her shoulders. "What you're about to see is going to be gruesome. And Markus is most likely going to pass out before it's over. Is there anything you'd like to say to him before I get started?" She nodded so he stepped aside and motioned to her ex.

Kelly walked over to him, her heels against the concrete echoing around the silent room. Hate was clear in both of their eyes. "You…" she started pacing around the chair he was tied to. "I loved you with every...cell...in my being." She said, placing her fist over her heart at the memory. "But...that love is gone." She stopped walking and stood across from him, glaring down at him. "You starved it and stomped it so far into the dirt it couldn't see the light of day. Since that day that love has sat in that dark hole and festered into a raging hate," She walked over and leaned down, putting her hand on the back of the chair her nose almost touching his, "that burns so hot it is taking everything in me to not get that iron myself and burn that cold black heart from your chest." She stood up and turned her back on him. "Unfortunately, I have to assume that would get me into a world of trouble." She slipped her eyes up Negan's body to his eyes. "Correct?"

"Correct." Negan answered.

"So," She said with a sticky sweet, chipper voice as she whipped around and walked back over to Markus, "I'll have to settle for the satisfaction of watching whatever torture Negan has in store for you." She leaned down and whispered, "I hear it's going to be gruesome and honestly, I'm a little excited." She admitted with a smile and a wrinkle of her nose that Negan found incredibly adorable.

Markus looked at her with fear in his eyes as she walked back over to stand beside Negan. Finally Markus realized exactly what he had done to her, what he turned her into. Then it sank in that he was about to get the side of his face melted by a red hot iron.

"You done?" Negan asked with a smirk at her.

"That was a little long winded. I apologize." She told him quietly.

"Don't apologize, Darlin'." He told her as he stood up straighter. "This is a part of your therapy and honestly," he leaned over and whispered, "it got me a little excited." She bit her lips closed to keep from laughing. He passed her his baseball bat. "Keep Lucille company for me." He told her and she took it without hesitation. To keep the barbed wire from messing up her clothes she put the end of it on the floor between the toes of her shoes and rested her hands on the end of the handle.

She didn’t look at Markus, but instead watched as Negan put on a thick leather glove. “D.” he called and Dwight grabbed the red hot, old school iron out of the fire with a hook and handed it to Negan. “I’m sorry Markus, but you knew the rules. Secrets don’t make friends.”

Markus started breathing heavily through his teeth anticipating what was about to happen as Negan moved the iron closer and closer to Markus’s face until it made contact with his cheek and jaw. Markus screamed, never taking his eyes off of Kelly. Negan’s eyes were also on Kelly's, looking for a reaction. “Psychotic Bitch!” Markus yelled right before he passed out. All her face held was a smirk of triumph.

Negan removed the iron from his face, taking skin and meat with it. “Let Markus’s face be an everyday reminder to all of you and him that secrets are against the rules and will get you the iron in a heartbeat.” He called to the crowd then handed the iron back to Dwight. “He’s all yours Doc." Negan walked over to her, she picked up Lucille and he took it from her with a smirk. "Thank you, Darlin'." They walked in silence until they got in the room. “So, before I tied Markus to that chair we had a chat.” Negan started as she sat down on the end of the bed and he started taking his jacket off. “According to him you lied to me.”

“About what?” she asked, confused because she had never lied to Negan.

“He says that you did cheat on him with Daryl.” He said as he put his jacket next to her on the bed then pulled a dining chair up to sit across from her. “Now one of you is lying and I want to know who.”

Kelly sighed and rubbed at her temples. “I never slept with Daryl.” She answered, telling the truth. “Daryl was a listening ear and a good friend to me but it was never romantic. I wouldn’t blame you if you didn’t believe me, but I told you before and I will tell you again. I don’t lie. Lies only further complicate what's already complicated.”

“I believe you.” Negan told her, staring at her with appraising, judging eyes. “I know what a cheater looks like, I don’t see that quality in you.”

Kelly gave him a small smile that lasted for a split second. “You wanted to know when I started shutting down?” she asked and Negan nodded. “I thought it happened slowly, that I didn’t just break and shut down all at once, but I did. I broke the night he told me that I was the most disgusting person that he’d ever met and he couldn’t stand looking at the woman who let his children die for a second longer. I cried for a full twenty-four hours, hating him and hating myself, missing my children.” She sniffled and quickly wiped at her eyes, taking away the tears before they could fall. “After that I never shed another tear.”

Negan slowly blinked at her sympathetically seeing more signs of her starting to feel again. Not being able to stop himself, he placed his hand on her cheek and swiped a tear away with his thumb. She gave him a small, sad smile as she placed her hand over his, reveling in his touch, before she pulled it away from her face. “He’s a douchebag.” Negan said, making her glance up at him. “He deserved every bit of what he got today.”

“Yeah.” She whispered then looked back down at his hand. She stroked her thumbs over the back of his hand, thinking about how she’d never been attracted to someone’s hands before. At the moment all she wanted to do was put it back on her cheek and let him have his way with her. Instead she said, “Okay change of subject, you ever had a hand massage?”

“No.” Negan answered with a bit of a smirk that suggested she was weird for asking. “Why?”

“Because you did me a favor today, you gave me a break from this room and let me get something out that's been bottled up inside me for a very long time. I studied to be a manicurist before I settled down." She slipped her thumbs down his pointer and pinky fingers, admiring how long and slim they were. "We were taught how to give hand massages. I would very much like to give you one. They feel really good and it's the only way I can think of to say thank you.” she said as she flexed his wrist with one hand then slid her other one up it aligning their fingers with their palm pressed to his.

“Really, that's the only way you can think of to thank me?” He asked with a big grin that was suggestive as shit. She just rolled her eyes then looked up at him through her lashes. “If you insist, sure, but it will have to wait until after I get done with the daily bullshit.” He stood up and grabbed his jacket off of the back of the chair. She found herself admiring his body as it flexed from him shrugging on the jacket.

After he left she sank down on the bed then leaned back, trying to figure out how she was going to not fall for him, considering he was the only company she had, when a sound came from the door and she turned to see a white piece of paper slide under the door with her name written on it. Curiously, she walked over and picked it up. “Meet us in the room at the end of the hall tomorrow at three.”

She stared at it, contemplating if she would really meet them or not, but after bouncing back and forth between yes or no, she decided that the only thing she could do was show the note to Negan. He was the only person she could trust. Anyone could have put that note under the door.

After the sun had set Negan finally came back, a tray of food in hand. Tonight was a simple meal of mashed potatoes and a small pork chop. She was quiet and didn’t look at him as he took off his jacket and sat down at the table across from her. When he started eating she picked at hers. “You wanna tell me what you're thinking about so hard over there?” Negan asked around a bite of potatoes.

Katie reached into her pocket and pulled out the price of paper. He frowned at her as she unfolded it then slid it across the table to him. "This was slid under the door while you were gone."

He picked it up and looked at it then put it back down on the table. "Why did you show this to me?"

"Because secrets don't make friends, obviously." She answered using his words.

"Did you want to keep it a secret?" He asked. "Did you want to meet with them?"

"No, of course not." She answered as if the questions offended her. "Your people saw me today. The women in the black dresses, they're your wives, right?" She asked and he nodded. "They don't seem to like me. For all I know this could be from them. They might be trying to rid you of the woman who takes up all of your nights."

"You didn't see who left it?" He asked.

She shook her head no. "I was too scared to open the door and look." She admitted.

"You don't have to be scared. No one is going to hurt you." He assured her. "Finish eating before it gets cold."

When they were both done, Kelly cleaned everything up and set the tray outside the door. When she turned around her eyes landed on Negan taking his shirt off. She averted her eyes to the floor knowing he was about to put on his pajama bottoms. When she looked back up, Negan held a shirt and a pair of light blue plaid boxers out to her. She did the same as she had done the night before and changed without showing him anything.

As he poured himself a glass of water she grabbed the tube of lotion out of her bag and sat down in the center of her side of the bed, crossing her bare legs. When Negan turned around and looked at her she patted the bed for him to join her. “Right, hand massage, I forgot.” He sighed as he walked over and set the glass of water on the makeshift night stand then sat down on the bed in front of her, mimicking her sitting position.

When he didn’t willingly give her his hand she sighed and picked it up. She started by massaging the underside of his forearm then worked her way down to his palm where she massaged a bit then stopped to add lotion. As she worked she made it a point to not look at Negan’s face. It was particularly hard to not look up when she ran her thumb from the bottom center of his palm to the base of his thumb and a breathy moan left his lips.

“You were right, that does feel good.” He sighed and she smiled to herself.

“I figured you could use it, considering you carry Lucille around all day.” She said with a glance at the bat that he had placed in the corner of the room.

“Are you calling my leading lady fat?” Negan asked with a playful tone in his voice.

Kelly faked a dramatic gasp. “I would never.” She placed a hand on her chest looking shocked that he would ask her that.

Negan actually laughed at her and she couldn’t help but look up at the bright genuine smile on his face. He stopped laughing when she started massaging again and hit the center of his palm making a deep groan rumble his throat again. She would be lying if she said she didn’t get a little turned on at the sound. Other than the occasional moan from Negan, the room was silent as she finished up his left hand. When she started on his right she looked up at him again to see him looking at her with lust hazed eyes. “Fuck, sweetheart that feels fucking amazing.” Negan laughed loudly. An electric wave shot from her chest through her every limb then settled in her core.

“Yeah, that’ll convince people we’re not screwing.” Kelly giggled a little, not looking up from her work.

“Well I am hard as a fucking rock right now.” Before she could stop herself her eyes moved from his hand to his crotch to see that he wasn't lying. The truth was there, long, hard, curved and begging to be let out of the confinement of his jeans. He didnt miss that she actually looked. “You should do my cock next. It's obviously begging to get a taste of your talented hands.”

Her mouth went dry at his words and as much as she wanted to look at his face she kept her eyes down and kept massaging. “I’m gonna have to refer you to one of your wives for that particular massage.”

“Damn.” He sighed and Kelly smiled. “Well, can’t blame a guy for trying.” She didn’t respond and instead worked in silence, making sure to hit all the spots that got reactions out of him on his left hand. When she was done, she glanced at his watch to see that it was almost ten o’clock. So she dropped his hand and finally looked up at him to see him smiling at her with closed lips. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” She told him with a small smile in return.

While he got up and washed his hands Kelly spread their blankets out, splitting the bed between them then tucked herself under her cover. He turned the light off then did the same. As she laid there thinking about how she felt about Negan, how he made her feel safe and how every touch from him sent sparks through her, making her feel alive for the first time in years, her hand slid to the center of the bed, bumping into Negan’s where it was already waiting for hers. His hand slid over hers, and flipped it so her palm was facing up then brushed his fingertips over her palm sending a shock wave through her. She thought he was just teasing her until his palm met hers and he laced their fingers together. "So about this morning..." He whispered, making her chest tighten. "Did you like being close to me?"

"I did." She answered, her voice nervous and shaky.

He sat up, pulled her blanket off and tossed it to the floor then tugged his over her. "Get over here." The gravel in his whispered words told her that resisting wasn't an option. Even if it was, she wouldn't have. So she turned her back to him and intended on scooting over, but he looped an arm around her waist and pulled her flush against him. She rested her head on his pillow that his arm that wasn't around her was under. She tried to even out her breathing as he slid his hand down her arm then grabbed her hand when he found it. "Tell anyone I like to cuddle and I'll personally kick your ass."

"Doesn't sound very threatening coming from a man who likes to cuddle." She joked without thinking.

"My point exactly." He whispered harshly.

"Yeah yeah, you got a reputation to protect. No worries, my lips are sealed." She whispered. "Besides, I'm pretty sure you couldn’t kick my ass even if you had cause to."

"Did you forget who you're talking to?" He asked, if it hadn't been for the hint of amusement in his voice she would've thought that she pushed too far.

"No, but I don’t think you know who you're talking to." She answered being cocky.

"Oh yeah?" He asked with a chuckle.

"Yeah." She answered with a smile in her voice.

"We'll see about that." He laughed and she wished that she could see his dimpled smile, but it was pitch black in the room. "Good night, Dead Girl."

"Good night, Savior." She whispered then snuggled her head into his pillow and quickly drifted off to sleep.

[takeiteasypeasybaby]

Hey guys! Chapter 15 of ‘Save Me’ has been released ✌🏻Go check it out and lemme know what you think. As always thank you to everyone supporting my page and story, it means the world ❤️

But...a special thank you to my top supporters:

@stephlee92 @thy1grace @ninamarietwd @androgynoustoadknightshark @captainmotgane @ravenwings73 @scorpioempress @fitzym @star017 @deanthedemon @lostdarksoul6 @danaedaniels @negansmistress1987 @blackbird69 @lesley28 @x-its-funnier-in-enochian-x @negan-morningstar @negan-the-cat @neganslucille87

^ JDM being beautiful as always appreciation gif

[takeiteasypeasybaby]

Save Me: Chapter 19 - Whispers

~Hey Guys! Chapter 19 is out ❤️ Molly finally learns about what happened at the lineup and why Rick’s group never came to save her... I hope everyone enjoys this chapter and stay safe ✌🏻~

Finally, all the secrets of the Sanctuary would be revealed and Molly would now be forced to come face to face with the 'true' nature of Negan.

Three weeks later...

It had been weeks since I saw him.

I walked around the Sanctuary for a while, trying to keep some distance between Negan and I.

I couldn't let him touch me let alone talk to me.

I felt like I could cry every time that I saw him because of how much pain I was putting him through.

He must of thought that I no longer loved him.

I needed to talk to someone and the only person who knew was Sherry.

I walked over to the old wives compound, the room where they used wait for Negan was now more of a communal area for them.

As soon as I opened the doors, the ex-wives looked at me with scepticism and wonder.

Sherry seeing me, rushed over and asked me to come with her so we were out of earshot.

'Come in here' she said quietly, ushering me into the old closet room which was now just storage.

It was like she was in two places at once, her mind clearly somewhere else.

'What is it?' I asked.

'I can't take it anymore' she said looking at the ground.

'What?' I said quietly.

'After what happened to you, I can't lie anymore' she said, tears falling down her face.

I sat in silence, waiting for her to tell me.

'You need to get out of this place. You need to leave Negan behind and go, because I can't watch you get hurt. I just can't' she said, her voice shaking on every word.

My eyes started to well up, knowing that she had kept something from me and it involved Negan.

'Sherry...tell me. Now' I said sternly and breathing heavily.

She wiped her eyes and took a deep shaky breath.

'Negan killed your friends. Glenn and Abraham' she said, through her tears.

Her words seemed to fade away like I was hearing them under water.

'I should have told you when I knew. God, I am so sorry Molly' she said crying.

I was dazed, paralysed by these words.

'H-How do you know?' I said now looking up at her.

She sighed, 'a few months ago, Negan went to Alexandria and his men boasted of him killing two of Rick's people. Dwight told me their names' she said quietly.

I was still in disbelief and shock.

'Dwight was there?!' I asked, my voice raising slightly.

She just nodded 'he tried to stop it, but it was no use' she said wearily.

'He wouldn't do that to me' I said shaking my head as the tears rolled down.

Sherry tilted her head and reached out her hand.

I instead stood up and paced around the room.

'I told you, he's a monster' she said calmly but sternly.

I just kept repeating 'he wouldn't do that to me'.

Sherry took a deep breath before saying 'Go down to the armoury. Look in the drawer next to the bin. You need to know' she said nodding at me, while her eyes were full of pain.

I spun around to look at her. A part of me now believing that this was true.

I wiped my eyes and raced out of the room, running down the hall to the armoury.

Sherry sat back with her head in her hands and watched me leave.

As soon as I got to the room, there were a couple guys working including Eugene.

I shouted in rage 'everyone out. Negan's orders!'.

They looked at me for a second before I shouted again 'out!' to which they all put down what they were doing and left.

Eugene sat there in silence, I ignored him and went over to the drawer.

I took in a deep breath and pulled. It was locked.

I grabbed a hatchet and started hacking at it in a tear filled rage.

Eugene just looked at me, standing up once he saw what I was doing.

Suddenly, the drawer came open.

I audibly gasped as I saw the photographs.

Pictures, upon pictures of mutilated bodies with their heads bashed in.

Tears flowed more furiously now as I tried to look away.

I tipped the pictures onto the floor and fell weakly to my knees.

I sorted through the pictures and then I found them.

Two pictures named 'Ginger' and 'Asian'.

My heart sank as I saw their mangled bodies.

I let out a sound which I'd never done before. It wasn't a scream, It was guttural, it was pure pain.

Knowing that two people I loved had died at the hands of the man I loved.

Eugene just stood there, knowing exactly what I was holding in my shaking hands.

I felt nauseous, I felt weak and strengthened by rage at the same time.

I breathed deeply before I walked over to Eugene and slapped the pictures down onto his desk.

I looked up at him slowly, with a fury in my eyes 'you knew' I said softly.

'I was there' he said shaking as tears filled his eyes.

I sighed and shook my head.

'This isn't happening' I told myself.

'Why didn't you tell me? Why are you working for him? After what he did?!' I yelled.

'I tried to be brave, like Abraham had taught me to be. Negan swore to kill us all if we told you' he said frantically through tears.

I looked up at him on his last comment.

'What did you just say?' I asked slowly.

'He made everyone, including the Saviour's, swear to keep it a secret' Eugene said looking away from me.

I collapsed to the floor.

I tried to cover my mouth to hold back the tears as my breathing became more rapid.

I was having a panic attack.

'Maggie, Rosita, Sasha' I whispered though muffled breaths.

I looked up at Eugene's desk which had a bottle of whiskey on it.

Eugene helped me up as I undid the bottle cap and took a large glug.

He just watched me, it must have been like he was reliving it all over again.

I exhaled and wiped my mouth and eyes.

'I need you to get Sherry and Dwight for me' I said to Eugene as my hand shook on the bottle.

He just looked at me and gave a curt nod and walked out.

In silence, the room now felt eery.

Every touch, every kiss, every word, every lie, every ounce of pain. All memories of Negan came flooding into my mind.

The love of my life had destroyed me.

I now knew what I needed to do. For me, Maggie, Rosita and Sasha.

Just as I heard footsteps coming back, I grabbed a gun from the box and some ammo and slid them into my waistband, folding my top down over to cover them.

The door swung open and in came Eugene with Dwight and Sherry close behind.

They were all wary and hesitant.

'Molly, I-' Dwight said as he walked in.

'Don't' I said stopping him.

'I need both of you to help me, Eugene I need you to work on that plan we discussed, for Abraham. Sherry, I need you to act as a distraction while Dwight gets me out of this place' I said seriously.

Dwight and Sherry looked at each other before looking back at me.

'Got it' Sherry said confidently, while Dwight still hesitated.

'Dwight, if you truly want to help us, I need you to get me back to my family' I begged.

He paused for a moment before looking to Sherry and finally nodded in agreement.

'I have a plan' I said, my eyes now glistening with vengeance...

[takeiteasypeasybaby]

Save Me: Chapter 22 - Alone

~Hey Guys! Chapter 22 is out now ❤️ Molly encounters Saviours as Rick confronts Negan about Molly’s presence at the Sanctuary...I hope everyone enjoys this chapter and chapter 23 will be out on Sunday 🤟🏻~

It was better to be alone, than to hurt again.

There I was, lying wrapped tightly in his arms. He kissed my neck gently through my hair.

I could feel his warm breath against my ear, tingles rushing down my spine and a smile now plastered across my face as my eyes remained shut.

I awoke abruptly to hear a gunshot outside.

It had been a dream, a perfect dream. I was back in my surroundings, the abandoned damp house.

I darted towards the window, and peered outside, shielding the majority of my body from anyone's view.

There were a group of men standing close to the house, with a car that I recognised.

Shit. Saviours.

They were standing around pointing at the various houses. They meant to search them.

Negan sent these guys to bring me back? Or worse kill me?

He let me go. It didn't seem like something he would do.

I was amidst my thoughts as I still crouched by the window.

Suddenly, one of them looked in my direction, frowning as I shifted frantically out of view.

I could still hear them outside, 'check it out!' one shouted.

My eyes widened. Fuck.

I took out my gun and held a knife below it. I paced quietly to slide behind the bedroom door.

I heard the front door creak open as a couple of guys walked in slowly.

'Could've been a walker' he warned the other guy.

I smirked, oh boy you've got something worse coming for you. I would never let them kill me or take me back.

They walked up the stairs and went into separate rooms to check them out.

Seeing one guy walk into the adjacent room, I slipped round the side of the door and followed him in.

I made no sound as I crept up behind him.

'Hey Mike check this out' he said softly as he bent down to reach for an old Pac-Man game.

I wrapped my arm around his chest and slit his throat quietly.

Blood splattered against the wall and I set him down gently on the floor.

The other guy said 'what?' as he came round to enter the room.

I waited against the wall and had my gun aimed at the door ready.

He walked through the threshold and shouted 'you!' as I shot him in the head.

There were still three other guys out there and the gunshot had now alerted them to my position.

I crept round to the window and opened it slightly to position my gun.

They were arguing and shouted 'Mike, Robbie, what's going on?' from outside the house.

I managed to get a clear shot on one of them and killed him instantly. The other two ducked and ran into the house and up the stairs.

They fired on the room I was in repeatedly. They had far more ammo than me.

After firing for a few minutes, seeing all the bullet holes in the wall. I dragged one of the bodies over to the door so that the blood would spill through under the door.

They mumbled to each other, thinking I was dead.

I heard their footsteps slowly get closer to the door. I looked around the room to see if I could use anything.

I smiled when I saw an aerosol can of old deodorant. Fuck yeah.

I crawled to pick it up and counted a couple seconds until I knew they were close.

I opened the door suddenly, through the can out and shot at it.

They gasped as the can spluttered and exploded, sending a cloud of white powder through the hall.

They were disorientated and shouted to each other.

Seeing the back of one of the guys step backwards towards me, I grabbed the back of him and held him with a knife to his throat.

Once the mist had cleared, the other guy stood in front of us and aimed his gun at his friend.

'Put down your weapons' I shouted to him as his friend struggled in my arms.

The other guy started to lower his gun slightly as I said sternly 'tell me who sent you and I won't kill you'.

He looked at his friend and sighed saying 'Simon. He told us to kill you'.

'Really? I'm guessing that asshole will kill you if you don't kill me' I retorted, tightening my grip on his neck.

He winced, 'do what she says' he said shaking.

'Be smart, me or Simon' I said slowly.

He sighed before saying 'I'll take my chances' and raised his gun back up at his friend, willing to shoot us both.

Seeing his intent, I shot him in the heart immediately, his friend said 'please' as I slit his throat.

I dropped to my knees, weary and numb. I felt no remorse killing those men. It was me or them.

I was more like Negan than I thought, or even worse, I was already like him before we met.

I wiped my brow, pushing all thoughts of him out of my head.

I snapped back into action seeing walkers approaching the house. They must have heard the gunshots.

I grabbed my rucksack and swept supplies into it as I ran down the stairs and out the front door.

They were getting closer and started to clamber and snarl around the Saviour's car. I ran to it, shooting the walkers nearest the door.

They dropped as I pulled open the door and shut it just in time as more walkers now encircled it.

I started the engine and saw that there was a half tank of gas. Thank god.

I pushed my foot down and floored it sharply away from them. The ones in front of the car flung wildly over the bonnet.

I had no idea of where I was going but I just kept heading further and further away from the Sanctuary.

I drove for about half an hour as I began to see roads that I recognised. I was close. These were the old routes to Alexandria.

A smile grew across my face in relief which was quickly replaced by a scowl seconds later.

I stopped dead in the middle of the road.

I couldn't go back. I couldn't go home.

How would I even begin to explain? How could I even look at Maggie, Rosita or Sasha?

Rick would banish me like he did to Carol years ago.

I was better off out here.

I couldn't stay too close, given that Negan and the Saviours would come to collect each week, I couldn't risk anyone seeing me. Least of all, him.

Negan's POV//

Silence, complete silence.

I sat there, in my room with Lucille propped by my side. My hand slipped slightly as I poured myself another glass of bourbon.

I was almost through the entire bottle.

I sighed and rubbed my forehead. I missed hearing her voice.

I lifted the glass up to my lips as I heard a faint Negan echo around the room. I stopped dead and put the glass down.

It was her voice, Molly.

'Fuck, I'm going crazy' I whispered to myself. I stood up and smashed the glass against the wall and walked to the window.

I gripped the window ledge firmly as my eyebrows furrowed. I was trapped. I had lost the only thing that made life worthwhile.

After Lucille, I never thought I would find someone like that again. I fucking ruined it.

Suddenly, my thoughts were ripped from me by a slight knock and the door opening slowly.

'I thought you might like some company' a hesitant voice said.

I sighed, knowing it was Frankie. 'If I wanted your company, I would've asked for it. You're not my wife anymore' I snapped at her.

She was silent for a second before she closed the door again.

I bowed my head against the window pane. I needed news of her, anything.

I threw on my jacket and marched over to the door, I spun back around and picked up Lucille, almost forgetting her.

I strolled to Simon's room and knocked loudly on the door.

'Negan' he answered.

'Molly. Was there really nothing you found those first weeks?' I said exhaustedly.

He looked at me with surprise.

'No, nothing really. Except this' he said coldly as he handed me a necklace. It was her locket.

'We found it round the arm of a walker' he said with an amount of admiration.

I scowled in disbelief as my eyes began to water.

'She can handle herself' I said, smiling weakly with hope.

'It didn't look good sir, there were a hoard of them around it' he said looking down.

I gripped the locket in my hand and marched away back to my room.

I was full of guilt, rage, fear and regret. To think that I had put her in this situation. I might have killed her.

It was overwhelming me and I was drunk. At least that's what I told myself later on.

I found myself stumbling into the wives lounge. Ex-wives.

I leant against the doorframe and looked around. None of the other wives remained, only Frankie.

She sat there in her black dress and looked up at me. I just needed to forget her and feel like myself again.

'Frankie, baby. Come with me' I said smirking at her.

She grinned widely and jumped up, running over to me. I tried to seem interested but really I was using her.

The next morning...

I woke up the next morning, her arm wrapped around me.

My eyes opened as I felt her behind me. I sighed, she didn't feel like Molly.

I got up and looked over at her as I got dressed. I felt nothing.

As I picked up Lucille, I grabbed Molly's locket and pressed it against my lips before holding it in my pocket.

I was wrong. She didn't make me weak, she gave me strength. Holding that locket in my hand showed me that.

I was regenerated with a vengeance.

I ordered everyone into the meeting room, it was time Rick got what was coming to him.

At least there was a comfort in knowing Molly couldn't hate me more than she did.

At that, there were bullets fired against the walls, smashing in the windows.

I peered out of the window to see Rick's group shielded with metal barricades.

'What's the plan?' Simon said sternly as I simply scanned around for her.

'We talk. Otherwise we're just wasting metal on metal' I said as I walked out of the door.

Dwight, Simon, Arat, Gavin and Eugene following me.

'Well shit! I'm sorry, I was in a meeting' I said sarcastically, swinging Lucille over my shoulder.

I looked at all of them.

'I see you got your little mud flaps with ya. So I'm not exactly feeling a reason for us to try throwing lead at each other. I care about my people, I'm not just gonna throw them into the line of fire because I wanna play my dick is bigger than yours!' I yelled.

I smirked before softly saying 'it is, by the way. We both know it'.

I paced on the balcony, looking now at Rick.

'But, I'm also comfortable enough to accept the fact if it wasn't. But I'm certainly not gonna let my people die over that shit, like your about to' I said, pointing to him with Lucille.

'So Rick, what the hell can I do for ya?' I asked mockingly.

He paused before moving out into full vision.

'Give us Molly' he yelled. I froze at her name.

I looked down awkwardly, 'she's not here, she left' I said, choking slightly.

Rick just nodded in frustration, probably thinking I lied.

'Dwight, your name's Simon, you're Gavin and you?' Rick said pointing at my people.

'Arat' she replied.

I was now fed up with his bullshit.

'Rick I'd feel remiss-' Eugene spoke before he was interrupted by Rick.

''No! I know who you are...' he said now scowling at him.

'Listen you five, the Saviours inside, all of you have a chance to survive here, to survive this. Y'all can live if you surrender. Can't guarantee it anytime but now. Right now' he spoke, almost pleadingly.

I just smiled and a light chuckle escaped my lips.

'So they surrender, and you and your little piss patrol doesn't kill em. That sounds like a good deal!' I said sarcastically.

I now looked down at him, saying 'what about me Rick?'.

'I told you, twice. You know what's gonna happen' he yelled.

I nodded, 'I do, I do know what's gonna happen. You have no idea the shit that's about to go down. Lemme ask you something Rick, you think you have the numbers for this fight?' I said gesturing to the Sanctuary.

'You don't' I added.

'Let's find out shall we?' Rick stayed confidently.

I was silent.

'You're gonna make me count. Okay, okay, I'm counting. Ten, nine, eight, seven...' he yelled before he opened fired on all of us.

I ran down the stairs and round the back while my guys ran back inside.

Rick followed and fired on the scrap metal I was crouching behind.

'Rick! It's not about you' a voice said to Rick, making him ceasefire.

He went round the side and I ran towards the nearest base.

The old trailer.

Walkers encircled it and I was trapped inside.

'Fuck' I mumbled. 

I sat inside, in darkness when the door opened to reveal Father Gabriel...

[takeiteasypeasybaby]

Save Me: Chapter 16 - An End or A Beginning

~Hey Guys! This is Chapter 16 of ‘Save Me’ ❤️ Molly confides in Sherry about her relationship with Negan which progresses to new heights 😉 I hope everyone enjoys this chapter, it’s pretty long! Chapter 17 will be out on Sunday🤟🏻~

Molly has built up walls around her ever since her sisters died. She thought Negan would be the man to break them, but would he break her instead? Tonight would be the night that changed Molly's life forever, for better or for worse. From here on out, whether or not she had fully accepted it, she was Negan's.

Walking out of the armoury, I felt deflated. I went from belonging at to two places to feeling like I didn't belong anywhere. I couldn't trust anyone and my family meant nothing to him.

Eugene seemed to be adjusting better than me. I guess it's true what they say about getting too close to power.

As I was in my own thoughts, walking down the hallway, just as I passed the doors to the main hall, the doors swung open to reveal him.

I looked at him briefly with no emotion as I carried on walking to my room.

'Molly' he said softly.

I stopped suddenly, still not facing him.

'We need to talk' he said exhaustedly.

I turned around slowly.

He looked tired, like he hadn't slept after yesterday.

'I think I'll skip the excuses thanks, you'll probably just give me more of the same bullshit you spouted yesterday' I said sternly before I spun back around and carried on walking.

'I did what I had to do' he said softly.

'The hell did you just say?! You promised me one. One person and you lied to me, never mind the fact that you actually enjoyed it' I yelled as my eyes started to well up again.

'It would have just been your boy Spencer, but that girl tried to kill me! Or have you forgotten about that?! I told you, every time they resist, there has to punishment. They brought it on themselves' he shouted back.

'Why the hell do you think they resist?! You acted like a complete asshole at Alexandria' I yelled back.

'Alright, fine darlin, we're doing this. Yeah, I enjoyed it. I enjoyed every goddamn minute. What do want me to say? Seeing the people who killed an absolute assload of my people squirm makes me happy. But what about you doll? You don't think I noticed you step in front of that girl? She your little girlfriend?' he said sternly as he walked slowly towards me.

I broke eye contact with him when me mentioned Tara.

'Oh, darlin. Looks like I've touched a nerve' he whispered mockingly. 'You can pretend that I'm the bad guy if that's what will help you sleep at night, but you know the truth, just like me' he whispered edging closer to me.

I scoffed. 'You're right. I lied. But that girl I protected is my sister, Tara. So if you or any of your 'Saviours' ever threaten her again, I won't hesitate to kill you' I whispered in his ear.

I shot him a scowl as I walked away. He just stood there in awe as I walked away.

Once I got back to my room, I shut it behind me and leant back against it with my eyes closed.

I hated him but I wanted him.

I heard footsteps outside my door which was followed by a hasty knock. When I opened the door slowly and saw Sherry standing there, her eyes filled with hurt and anger. 'Are you and Dwight together?' she asked breathlessly.

I looked at her wide eyed. 'What?' I said almost chuckling.

'I'm serious. Frankie told me you kissed him and you've been going out on 'runs' together so cut the crap', she said now scowling.

I sighed, 'Sherry, you better come in' I said as I opened the door wider.

She hesitated before stepping in. A saviour who was her guard stood outside.

'Sherry, there is nothing going on between me and Dwight. To be honest he's not my type. But he's been a surprisingly good friend to me and he gets what I'm going through. I kissed him because I wanted to make Negan jealous and I've asked him to come with me on a couple runs but we just sit in silence in the sun. We both just needed space from this place' I said calmly.

She took a moment before sighing in relief. 'Thank god' she said smiling.

'You honestly think I could do that to you?!' I said smirking.

'Oh god I'm sorry!' she said pulling me into a hug.

'Wait wait wait, you wanted to make Negan jealous?!' she said frowning.

I looked down before looking back at her. 'Ah, yeah. Trust me, as far as I'm concerned that is completely over' I said sorrowfully.

'Are you sure he knows that?' she asked.

'What do you mean?' I asked anxiously.

'Well, Negan hasn't visited any of us for months now, I kinda assumed it was because you guys had a thing. But don't worry, none of the girls know, it's just me. They just think he's been busy' she said nonchalantly.

I looked at her, my jaw dropped almost to the floor.

She rubbed my arm, bringing me back to the present situation. 'Are you okay?' she asked softly.

'Oh my god. So wait, he hasn't slept with his wives since-' I said softly, stopping myself as the realisation hit. He hadn't been with his wives since our kiss.

Sherry's gaze still focussed on me, she was nervous now. 'Since?' she asked slowly.

I looked down before looking back up at her 'since we kissed' I whispered, in utter disbelief at myself.

Her eyebrows rose, 'you kissed him?' she asked calmly.

I just slowly nodded. After everything that had just happened, I was full to the brim with confusion.

She started to stroke my back in comfort, 'and now?' she asked softly.

I shook my head. 'I have no clue. I mean what am I doing?! I mean who am I right now?!' I shouted.

She sighed looking up at me as I paced around the room agitatedly.

'Do you love him?' she asked hesitantly.

I spun around immediately in shock at her question. I glared at her for a second, 'I-I, well, I' is what came out of my mouth.

She nodded slowly, clearly knowing what my answer was without even saying it.

'Just be careful, he's not-' she said strained, she sighed at finding it difficult to gather her words.

'He's not what, Sherry?' I asked folding my arms.

'What i'm trying to say is that...if he hasn't hurt you yet, he will soon. That's just who he is, and there's no changing him' she said in a hushed tone so no one outside could hear.

I avoided her gaze and turned slightly to the side. She knew exactly what I was avoiding.

She tried to meet my gaze by walking over to me and holding me by the shoulders, 'has he hurt you?' she asked worriedly.

I sighed, 'yeah' was all I could manage to respond.

She didn't pressure me to talk about it anymore but all that I could think about were Olivia, Rosita and the brutality of Spencer's death.

She looked at me, her eyes heavy with pity. 'I know what you're thinking' I said frustratedly.

'I don't wanna say I told you so but...' she said softly.

I smirked, 'yeah, thanks for that. I'll be fine' I said reassuringly.

Sherry smiled for a second before it disappeared. She needed to tell me something.

'Molly...I have to tell you somethin-' , the door swung open and the guard interrupted Sherry.

'Time's up' he said scowling at her.

He ushered Sherry out as she looked back at me apologetically. I frowned confused by the whole situation.

The way he had just acted right now, they way all of the Saviours did, Negan must have been hiding something from me and I wouldn't rest until I found out.

Sherry's POV//

As soon as that asshole had ushered me back to the room, I shot him a scowl as I went to sit back down.

He checked the room before leaving to go on a break. I made my escape.

I walked back out and took the back stairs down to the basement where the cells were.

I wanted to tell Molly about Daryl but Negan would kill me. So I had to take matters into my own hands.

I found his cell and whispered to him, standing outside the door, 'Daryl? It's Sherry'.

I slipped out the key from my dress that I'd hidden ever since I stole it from the guard when he was sleeping last week.

I opened the door slowly as Daryl stood up sharply.

'Follow me down the hall, once we get to the back doors, take a motorbike and drive home. I'll cover you' I whispered.

He hesitated before he followed me out. He was in a yellow jumpsuit they had given him, he looked terrible. But he had helped us before so I had to do this, whatever it cost me.

When we got to the back doors, I looked outside. It was clear, Daryl ran out, grabbed a motorbike and drove away.

Two Saviours yelled as they saw him from the top window.

I snuck back to the room, just in time for a guy to come round and check on us. I should have gone too, but I couldn't leave Dwight.

At least I protected one of Molly's family members.

Kingdom - Carol's POV//

He called himself the King. King Ezekiel, he had a tiger on a chain as Morgan wheeled me into the auditorium.

He said she was called Shiva but I had no idea what was happening anyway.

It was like a fairytale town. An actual Kingdom. Everyone was working away, planting crops, making weapons, training with each other.

People called the Saviours came to the Kingdom every week to take half of the supplies. Ezekiel was okay with that. He seemed like a reasonable enough man.

All I wanted in the beginning was to go back to Alexandria, but Ezekiel wouldn't let me leave.

He came to a compromise, I would live in the small house outside of the main area of the Kingdom but still within the walls.

Every morning he would come and bring me fruit and sometimes he would bring Shiva. She loved me.

Morgan had stayed for a little while at the Kingdom to make sure I was okay, then he left. He wanted to be alone.

I understood, I wanted that too initially.

One morning, I got a knock at the door. Thinking it was Ezekiel, I opened the door smirking. It was Morgan, he had came back.

'Do you really wanna know what happened in Alexandria?' he said hastily.

'What happened to you?' I asked.

Morgan paused with hesitation, pondering over his killing of a member of the Kingdom before he spoke.

'I killed Richard. Strangled him with my bare hands. Negan killed Glenn and Abraham' he said looking down.

I froze, processing what he just said. Tears began to roll down my face. I didn't want to fight anymore. I had come here because of that.

But I know knew that no matter what happened, I always would have to. Ezekiel had to resist them. We would no longer comply. This was our fight.

The next day...

Molly’s POV//

I could sense it. Negan was keeping something from me and what made it worse was the fact that Sherry knew.

But, I had to be smart, I had to play the long game.

I wanted to just trust him, but after Spencer and Olivia, I just couldn't, no matter how much it killed me inside.

I had plans for today, I was gonna check on the crops, talk to some of the families, help out in the kitchen but I was frozen in place.

My mind was reeling, thinking about what else he could be keeping from me. But surely it couldn't be that bad since Sherry also knew and kept the secret? If it was bad, she would tell me because I know her.

I spent hours pondering endlessly, looking out of my window to see people outside talking and transporting stuff.

I could just ask Sherry to tell me, or even Negan but it was safer for them not to know that I knew.

I threw myself back onto my bed, sighing as my head hit the pillow. What could it be?

There was a sudden knock at the door which made me jump up agitatedly.

When I opened the door, a Saviour was stood there with a vase full of wild flowers which held a single note card in between them.

I looked at him confused just as he said 'delivery from Negan' and put them into my hands and walked away.

I stood there for a moment, stunned. He gave me flowers.

I nudged the door shut with my hip as I went to place the flowers by the window. They were lavender with some tulips mixed in and smelled sickly sweet.

I picked up the card and unfolded it gently, it read:

                       Forgive me - N

Was he serious?! He expected me to forgive him immediately after he killed two of my friends?! I asked him to kill Spencer, but still! And with flowers, does he really think that I'm that type of girl?

The slight smile on my face vanished as I crumpled them up in frustration and chucked them into the bin outside my room.

I'm not a girly girl, I don't wear dresses, I'm not like his wives nor will I ever be and if that's the type of girl he wants, then he definitely doesn't want me.

I'm so conflicted. I want him, I want to be with him and I know how crazy I sound because of what he's done and what he's capable of, but theres a part of me that believes in him. But I can't take that leap if he's not serious, because if I'm betraying my family, it should be for a damn good reason.

I couldn't stay cooped up in here any longer. If I was left alone with my thoughts anymore, I'd go insane. I sighed, put on my jacket and combat boots and was ready to head out the door. 

I swung the door open, to find Negan standing there just about to knock on my door with Lucille like he usually does.

'What do you want?' I said tiredly.

'You didn't like the flowers huh?' he said with annoyance.

'Of course not. What kind of girl do you think I am? I'm not one of your wives, alright I don't want pretty things and I'm not gonna fucking forgive you just because you decide to buy me a gift' I said sternly.

His frown turned into a smirk slowly as his eyes lingered over mine. 'You're a goddamn angel you know that' he said smiling.

I frowned in confusion and asked 'what?'.

'I knew you wouldn't want the flowers, I just wanted to make sure I was right about you darlin' he said smirking.

'Right about me?' I asked now intrigued.

'Uh huh, figured you'd like this more' he said smirking as he pulled it from behind his back and handed it to me.

My eyes widened. 'My gun?' I said in astonishment.

'Yup. I got your buddy Dr Smartypants to revamp it a little. I have no fucking idea what the hell he did but I tested it and it sure as shit is cool' he said proudly.

I checked over the gun, it now had my initials engraved and a little button on the side which released a mini bayonet. It was fucking awesome, but I couldn't let Negan off easy. 'Thanks' I said cooly, putting it back into my holster and squeezing beside him to walk down the hallway.

'Wha? Thats it? I change my schedule to make things up to you and all you got is 'thanks'' he said charging after me.

'You lied to me' I said calmly.

'You lied to me! Let's not forget that you, alongside Rick and his merry band of pricks, took out over thirty of my men! You can't be mad at me for killing two, one of which you chose! Oh and your sister, you told me she was dead!' he yelled.

I hated when he was right. I yelled back 'I was protecting my her!'.

He scoffed, 'so you don't trust me?'.

I threw my arms in the air and said 'would you trust me if the roles were reversed?!'.

'Darlin...' he whispered as he put Lucille down and reached his arms out to me which calmed me.

'I'm not mad at you. I am angry, at myself. Because as much as I want to blame you, for everything, it's all on me. And every minute of every day that we spend together, is another where I feel guilty because the people that I love are suffering because of you, but I lov-' I stopped myself, but he knew what I was about to say.

His eyes looked as though they were on fire, amber highlights swirling through dark space.

He lingered on every word and as soon as I stopped myself from saying too much he didn't smirk or shoot me a mocking or pitying gaze, he wrapped his arms tightly around my waist and pulled me into a gentle kiss.

This time it was meaningful. It wasn't about lust or longing, it was about two people that cared so incredibly deeply for each other and just wanted to comfort each other in that moment and feel so connected that they felt like one.

I pulled away and whispered 'this doesn't mean I forgive you'.

He nodded and said sweetly 'I know. I know that I hurt you, but I promise I'll make it right'.

He placed one last kiss on my lips before he pulled away. Looking up at me, he smiled as his hands traced the curve of my back.

'I have to go, but meet me tonight at 7:00pm, my room' he whispered smirking as his lips were centimetres away from mine.

I sighed but nodded.

He smirked at me before picking up Lucille and sauntered off, whistling happily with a hop in his step, every once in a while turning round to look back at me.

I smiled back at him before I carried on down the stairs to go outside.

Little did I know then that Simon had been watching us the entire time, and had been doing so for weeks now.

Ever since I had made suggestions in the last meeting, he saw me as a threat. He wouldn't have minded if I was one of Negan's wives or a regular Saviour, but I represented the unknown for him.

Negan couldn't place me, so neither could he and therefore I threatened his position as Negan's second in command which was already made precarious by his public challenge of Negan in the meeting.

He hated me and would all the while be predicting my demise.

Several hours went by after Negan and I had somewhat reconciled. I had helped to plant some new crops, taken the food inventory and now was moving boxes of meals into the canteen.

I was just minding my own business when a couple of Saviours were sitting talking at a table as I walked by.

They spoke in hushed tones as I walked past but I could still hear what they were saying.

'I know, how could he do that to us? We needed that food. We better get some from Hilltop or that asshole Gregory's gonna get it' he whispered while he sharpened his knife.

They were talking about Alexandria, about Rick. Had Negan been going easy on them after our argument? I smirked slightly while I unloaded the boxes.

The Saviours all looked at me as I walked out, each of them nodding to me as I went past. That was weird, like they actually had respect for me or something.

I looked up at the clock in the corridor. Ah shit it was 7:05pm.

I hurried back to my room and changed into less dusty and worn clothing, choosing tight black jeans and a black tank top with my leather jacket. I took my hair down and fluffed it up a little, I looked like a damn badass in my all black ensemble.

Negan hated when people were late so I jogged down the hall to his room, catching my breath at the door before knocking.

He swung the door open, he looked relaxed and fairly happy despite what the Saviours must have been saying about him.

'Began to think you weren't coming doll' he said smirking.

'Well, you would have waited for me anyway' I said smirking back and waltzing into his room.

'Can I ask you something?' I said hesitantly as I shrugged off my jacket.

'Sure darlin' he said as he went over to sit down.

'Did something happen with my group?' I asked softly.

'What?' he said, almost panicked.

'It's just that people have been talking about the food situation' I said worriedly.

He relaxed now. 'Oh, that shit. Well, I thought I'd lay off Rick for a few weeks, give em time to get us some really good shit' he said while he fixed us some drinks.

I was so happy that he did that for me. I couldn't help it, I bounded over to him and turned him round to face me before I wrapped my arms around his neck.

'Did you do that, for me?' I asked sweetly.

'What do you think doll?' he replied sarcastically.

'Thank you' I whispered against his lips as he smiled.

'You're welcome darlin' he said smiling.

I just smiled wider as I pressed my lips against his.

He growled softly as I pressed my lips further into his, his hand wrapped gently around my neck as he attempted to dominate the kiss.

His other hand wandered down my ribcage before landing on my hip bone which he pressed against firmly as my hands stroked his torso playfully.

As soon as my fingers caressed the hem of his t shirt I lifted it slowly over his head and pressed my body closer to his, he groaned at the amount of layers still covering us, mainly me.

His fingers traced down my arms, skimming lightly over my breasts as he did so. A wave of electricity flowed through me just at the lightest of his touch.

He kissed me gently as he fingered the hem of my shirt, drawing circles with his thumb on my skin underneath.

His hands drifted under my shirt stroking gently up my naked torso, stopping just below my bra line.

I moaned softly at his touch making him chuckle slightly. 'You want more doll?' he whispered, I just responded with a whimper.

At seeing the effect he was having on me, he smirked and kissed gently across my cheek to my ear, nibbling and sucking my lobe as his hand grazed teasingly around the edges of my bra.

A wetness was starting to pool inside of me just as his hand finally grasped my breast, rubbing his thumb over my nipple over the cup.

I couldn't take it anymore. I yanked my shirt over my head and started to kiss him much more needfully now.

He smirked as I deepened the kiss, but seeing it as a strive for dominance, he spun me around and wrapped his arms around my waist as he started to kiss along my shoulders.

He delicately moved my hair aside as he kissed along my neck. Even though he couldn't see my facial expressions, he knew exactly what he was doing to me, knowing exactly where my sweet spot was.

As he did this, his hands trickled up my back once more and undid the clasp on my bra and pushed it down over my shoulders.

The cool air which touched my now exposed nipples mixed with his warm breath on my neck in between gentle kisses was enough to send a ripple of heat to course through my veins.

His warm hands now moved over my shoulders, massaging them gently as he did so, and travelled down to my breasts.

He lightly skimmed over them, brushing against my nipple teasingly before he cupped my breasts with both hands and pulled me backwards into him until I could feel his warm torso against my back.

My eyes closed lightly and I bit down lightly on my bottom lip as he massaged me gently.

He chuckled softly as his hands drifted down over my stomach, stopping at the waistband of my jeans.

'Uh uh' I mumbled. It was his turn now.

I pulled myself off of him and turned around to face him as his face started to form a frown. He was about to say something before I rendered him speechless by touching lightly against the buttons of my jeans.

I turned back around and undid the zip, pulling them down excruciatingly slowly, revealing my black laced underwear underneath.

He was speechless and I heard a low growl escape from his lips as my ass was now in full view.

I turned back around sweetly and glided over to him, running my hands over his chest.

Just as he started to lower his head to kiss me, I lowered myself to my knees and kissed down to his naval as I did so.

As I undid his belt buckle, his eyes darkened as a smirk sprung across his face.

He moaned softly as I felt against the bulge in his jeans, lightly touching my lips against the area as I undid his zipper.

His eyes were fixed on me as he stroked my arm while I pulled down his pants slowly.

As soon as I got them down around his ankles, his impressive member sprung up and rested against his torso. He was hard already.

My eyes widened as I saw the length of him, and just to tease him more I left light kisses up his thighs, each time edging closer to his shaft.

His smirk had now disappeared and his mouth was parted slightly as he breathed heavily in anticipation.

I smirked at the effect I was having on him, feeling satisfied that now I had the upper hand...literally.

I wrapped one hand around his length and began to pump back and forth slowly as I kissed him gently on the tip.

Swirling my tongue around the tip as I pumped him and licking along the length of him made him tilt back his head and let out a less controlled moan than before.

'Fuck', escaped his mouth as I started to take the full length of him in my mouth. His eyes were tightly shut and his mouth parted slightly as he was in my full control.

His eyes were tightly shut and his mouth parted slightly as he was in my full control. Just as a smile grew across my face, he looked back down at me and pulled me back up towards him.

He picked me up and I wrapped my legs tightly around his waist as he lustfully pushed his lips against mine.

He walked over to the bed and rested me down gently as he hovered over me. Leaning down, he left kisses along my body, nibbling and sucking against my nipples teasingly before moving down towards my navel.

His hands rubbed against my inner thighs as his kisses got closer and closer.

Suddenly, one hand rested on my mound as his other grazed over my folds.

I grasped at the sheets in reaction and my head flung back onto the mattress at the touch of him.

He smirked as his fingers danced over my entrance.

I was glistening already. 'God you're so fucking wet already darlin' he growled.

At this he readied two fingers at my entrance while his other hand glided downward over my clit.

I let out a soft gasp as he massaged circles with his thumb over my clit and plunged his fingers inside of me.

'Mmm' escaped my lips as my body riled and contorted with his every touch. Heat rose to my face as a rush of warmth and electricity flooded my body.

He chuckled against my thigh at my reaction and he knew then that I wanted more. I needed more.

He released his hands from me and edged his mouth closer to my entrance. Just the feel of his hot breath against me sent tingles up my spine.

'Tell me what you want darlin' he said softly, as his beard grazed my skin.

My head rocked to the side as my eyes opened to look at his dark orbs, 'I wanna feel your tongue inside of me' I whispered seductively.

He edged closer, his lips over my clit, 'you want me or you need me?' he whispered teasingly.

'Fuck, I need you Negan! I need you!' I expressed breathlessly.

At this his lips came crashing down to my clit as his tongue swirled and flicked around it, rolling his tongue back and forth along my folds.

I moaned loudly as he picked up the pace. Negan sensed that I was coming close and straddled me as I wrapped my arms around his neck, bringing him down into a passionate kiss.

I felt his length against my entrance which made me dampen with anticipation.

He pushed slowly inside of me and at the size of him I gasped audibly and wrapped my arms around him tighter.

He picked up the pace as my walls began to accommodate his size.

His eyes remained fixed upon mine as waves of pleasure rolled through both of us, and his hands rested either side of my head, gently caressing my hair with every movement.

I wrapped my legs around his hips tighter to bring him further into me which made us both quiver with satisfaction.

I could tell Negan was coming close as his eyes shut tightly and he pressed his forehead against mine so we were connected as one.

'Fuck i'm gonna cum' he growled.

This sent me over the edge as a final wave of pleasure rushed through my veins.

'Me too' I said breathlessly.

Negan moaned and grunted loudly as he came inside of me.

My eyes slowly opened as he pressed a deep kiss against my lips and stroked my hair.

My eyes locked on his, I couldn't help but smile at him. He was still serious like a thousand thoughts were running through his mind. He hesitated for a moment before he looked at me with that rare meaningful look where it was like he was nervous but also never more certain of anything in his life.

'I love you Molly' he said softly as he wrapped his arms around me.

I looked at him for a moment, almost in disbelief and shock. He loves me. HE LOVES ME. HE. LOVES. ME.

I ran my fingers through his hair before cupping his cheek and rubbing it gently.

'I love you too' I whispered against his lips before I pressed a gentle kiss against them.

He smiled down at me before he rolled over and opened his arms to cuddle me.

I smiled back as I nestled into his warm comforting arms and he pulled up the covers over us.

Our bodies intertwined, my head buried in his chest as he held me against him, everything was perfect. He was perfect.

At that we drifted off to sleep in each others arms and for the first time in my life, I felt safe.

[takeiteasypeasybaby]

Save Me: Chapter 14 - Trust

~Hey guys! This is Chapter 14 of ‘Save Me’ ❤️ It’s finally time for Molly and Negan’s first kiss 😍 Hope you enjoy and as always I appreciate you all so lemme know what you think! Chapter 15 is out on Sunday~

Emotions were running high for both Negan and Molly. But this time Molly was determined, she was going to get what she wanted. What she truly wanted, no matter how dark and twisted that was.

Waking up that morning felt different from any other, I had a mission, a plan.

Having these feelings about a man who I really shouldn't have feelings for made me feel like I was out of control, and I hated feeling like that.

Plus, I wanted to make him feel how I felt, when he would continuously flaunt his wives in my face when we both knew that we had feelings for each other.

So, today would be the day that he got what was coming to him and I knew exactly who to choose.

It was currently 7:00am so I knew that everyone would be in the main hall eating breakfast.

But, most importantly since Negan didn't have a morning meeting today, he would be there too.

I lingered getting ready, making sure I looked my best. Well, the best you can look in this fucked up world. I brushed out my hair, fluffing it up and cleaned down my jacket since it was still covered in walker guts. Quickly I pinched my cheeks, put on some skin tight jeans and my most low cut cleavage revealing tank top. Now I was ready.

I walked over to Dwight's room, he looked startled by my appearance but quickly asked me what I wanted. I asked him if he would help me out, since he owed me a big one after killing Denise.

He slowly nodded and after I told him, he scowled for a minute, refusing because of Sherry.

I told him that I didn't want to hurt her either, but as long as she knew it was just for show and she wouldn't be in the room anyway, he obliged, with less resistance than I expected which was flattering, I guess.

So, we made a plan that he would enter the hall first and stand close by to Negan, but not so close as it would be obvious that we were rubbing it in his face.

Looking through the little square of glass on the door to the main hall, I saw Dwight nod hello to Negan and go to stand against the wall.

So, there were groups of people chatting between Negan and Dwight but there was still a direct line of eye contact.

After taking a deep breath I marched in, smiling at some families and Saviours who had been kind to me, just before I pretended to spot Dwight in the room. I smiled at him before heading over while I completely ignored Negan.

Of course as soon as I walked through those doors, Negan sensed my presence and while Simon was talking to him, his eyes followed my every move, looking just past Simon's head.

I didn't make eye contact with him, not wanting him to think that I was doing this because of him, but because I genuinely wanted to.

Dwight's eyes were fixed on the ground until I came to stand in front of him. He was leaning back against the wall in a laid back manner which made the whole act much more believable.

Dwight said that looking past me, he could see Negan scowling at me just talking to him which made me smirk because I hadn't even started yet and he was already jealous as hell.

Dwight and I carried on like we were best buddies, even though we weren't. We were chatting about random shit and then laughing about it, Negan obviously thinking that we were flirting.

Dwight got up from leaning against the wall and moved closer to me as I decided just to go for it.

It was now or never, fuck it.

I pressed my lips firmly against his, Dwight's eyebrows raised as he moved in synchronicity with me, both of us going deeper into the kiss just hearing people whoop and cheer mockingly at our make out session.

When we eventually pulled away, I asked Dwight whether Negan was watching and as I said that, Dwight looked up and saw Negan standing there, his body now turned to directly face us.

Rage filled his eyes as he scowled harder than before, nostrils flaring and his grip on Lucille tightening.

Finally, he knew how it felt to have someone all over the person you like and not be able to do a damn thing about it.

I whispered to Dwight, thanking him while people still clapped and cheered. He just nodded, before clearing his throat and stroking my arm before heading out of the hall.

I turned around, still not looking at Negan but instead moving over to talk to some Saviours who hugged and high fived me as I left the hall.

I sighed in relief as I strolled back to my room, proud of how I finally got to feel like a badass again and finally able to take some control back over my life.

Shutting the door behind me, I went to take off my jacket and was just about to sit down when two loud earth shattering knocks erupted against my door.

I stood up, sighing because of my interrupted me-time when I opened the door to reveal Negan on the other side, breathless and red faced he shouted 'what the holy fuck was that?!'.

I looked at him, pretending to play dumb. 'I don't know what you're talking about' I said nonchalantly and moved back over to my chair and sat down.

'Dwight?! Really?! You've gotta be fucking kidding me?!' he said still yelling but this time shutting the door behind him so none of the Saviours could hear us.

Although they probably still could considering how goddamn loud he was being.

'Oh you saw that huh?' I said coolly as I picked up a book, flicking through the pages.

'Yeah darlin I saw that' he said angrily.

I moved around my room distractedly keeping my eyes on the pages.

'I don't know what it is about Dwight that just turns me on. Besides, I thought you'd be happy? Now you know for sure he's over Sherry...' I said shrugging my shoulders, a smirk slightly forming as I was amused by how jealous he was.

'So what is it? You got a thing for guys whose faces look like a fucking margarita pizza?' he said scowling and chucking Lucille onto my bed as he moved closer to me.

I sighed, 'Well, I don't think it'll be a long term thing, I'm just in it for the sex really' I said more nonchalantly than before.

I closed my book and chucked it onto the the chair as I walked towards him. He was furious at what I just insinuated.

'The fuck did you just say?!' he said inching closer till our bodies were pressed up against each other.

'I was surprised, he's really good with his hands...' I whispered seductively, making doe eyes at him.

He clenched his fists in frustration and grabbed my waist.

He inhaled and parted his lips, about to say something in response when he just sighed, dropping his head to the floor.

'Darlin, you know full fucking well what you're doing to me here alright? So can we just skip to the part where you say you want me instead?' he said defeatedly.

I looked back up at him, saying playfully 'who said I want you? maybe Dwight's a better fit'.

Just as he was lowering his lips to mine, I moved past him and walked to the door. He sighed in frustration, clearly wanting me as much as I wanted him, if not more.

He spun around to see me open the door and stand there, ushering him to leave.

He nodded, picked up Lucille and had a smirk rising to his lips as he got to the doorway and whispered in my ear, 'trust me darlin, I'd be a much better fit'.

He winked suggestively and left me speechless as he strolled down the hallway.

He knew I now wouldn't be able to think of anything else but him, inside me. Fuck sake.

Negan's words played on my mind for hours after he left.

I couldn't concentrate, knowing that he was just a few doors down from me. Then the thought of his wives popped into my head and my heart sunk again.

I could never have him because he would never give up his wives and I would never be one of them.

I had to take my mind off him, try to stop my feelings, think about everything he's done, everything he's done to people I love. What was wrong with me? How could I have feelings for someone like that?!

I sighed deeply before grabbing my jacket and headed downstairs to the main hall. I needed to see Dwight.

As I walked into the hall, people smirked looking at me while they turned back to their conversations, clearly whispering about what went down earlier with Dwight.

I walked up to Arat and said 'hey, have you seen Dwight?'.

She chuckled mockingly and said, 'shouldn't you know?'.

I nodded smirking. 'Thanks for the help' I said smiling sarcastically and rolling my eyes.

Before I knew it, Dwight strolled into the side door of the main hall and I ran after him.

Tapping him on the shoulder, I said 'hey, I need your help'.

Dwight looked around seeing all eyes on us, 'whatever it is, no' he said sternly.

'It's not what you think. I need you to come on a run with me' I whispered.

He looked at me frowning sceptically and asked 'why?'.

'I need to clear my head and I can't leave the compound by myself' I pleaded.

Dwight sighed before saying 'you do know Negan will kill me right?'.

I scowled, replying 'you do know you killed my friend and owe me right?'.

He looked down before saying 'fine, but only a couple hours. I need to get out of this place too. Meet me in five down by the basement stairs'.

He walked out, grabbing his cigarettes before talking to Simon and Arat.

Negan wasn't in the room, but it felt like he was since everyone was Negan and he had eyes everywhere. I looked around uncomfortably before grabbing some water from the canteen and walked down to the basement.

Dwight was there waiting for me as he brought two motorcycles round to the back door.

I smirked as I looked at the bikes, I hadn't ridden one in so long.

'This is where they're kept by the way. If you ever need one' he said seriously, like he predicted my future.

I looked at him sceptically before saying 'got it' and smiled.

We hopped on, strapped on our helmets and drove round to the front.

Arat and Simon had obviously told Negan I had left the compound because when I looked up to his room, he was standing by the window frowning down at me.

I looked at him briefly, knowing he would be pissed I had left without permission but I thought fuck it and revved the engine and drove off in front of Dwight.

We didn't even go anywhere in particular but it was just nice to breathe.

Sometimes with the amount of people, the Sanctuary can feel cramped and just too much.

Six months ago, who would have thought that I would be riding motorbikes with the man who killed my friend.

Our relationship had officially transformed into those who tolerate each other. Shit, I knew I would have to tell Sherry about all this before too long. I couldn't imagine what she must think considering someone must have told her what had happened.

Even though I cared about her so much, I didn't even know how to face her.

I think subconsciously I used Dwight in my plan instead of any other Saviour because I wanted to get back at Sherry for being able to sleep with Negan whenever she wanted, even though I knew she didn't want to. Fuck, I hated myself right now.

Dwight stopped on the road to have a smoke, while I just lay down on the grass soaking in the sun.

We didn't talk, we just sat in silence, both of us consumed by our thoughts. Dwight probably thinking of Sherry while I thought of Negan.

Suddenly, Dwight sat up and said hesitantly 'Molly, I have to tell you something'.

He stood up and stubbed out his cigarette on the grass. I looked over to him, 'go on' I said reluctantly.

He sighed and looked nervously around him in case any Saviours were close. 'I'm helping Rick' he said quietly.

My eyebrows rose in response, 'what do you mean?' I asked confusedly.

'A while back, your buddy Rosita, kidnapped me and brought me to Alexandria' he said defeatedly. I couldn't help but let a small smirk come to the surface at Rosita kidnapping him.

'Wait, Rosita was at the Sanctuary?!' I asked.

'Outside the walls, but yeah. Anyway, Rick interrogated me and I swore to them that I would do what I could to help them with Negan' he said slowly.

My mouth dropped open as my brows furrowed, 'why would you help my family?' I asked.

'Like you once said, I was doing it for someone else' he said slowly and now looking at the ground.

I just nodded, understanding exactly who he meant.

'If Negan ever found out...' I said worriedly.

'He won't' Dwight spoke sternly, 'we can take Negan down together, under the radar. Just you and me' he said reaching out his hand for me to shake.

I accepted it, not knowing what I was getting myself in for.

The sun was starting to set and we had killed a couple walkers that came onto the road so we decided to head back.

This time thinking about what people were probably thinking which couldn't have been further from the truth and in a messed up way, after Negan and Sherry, Dwight was probably the only person who actually knew me.

Once we got back, we propped up the bikes on the rack and headed back inside before I stopped him and said 'thank you, really'.

He nodded with a slight smile. Both of us understanding how much that silence outside the walls had meant to us.

Dwight headed down a passage, the one which he used to secretly meet Sherry when they knew Negan wasn't around.

I climbed the stairs from the basement up a few flights of stairs before a figure stopped in front of me.

Negan.

'Did you enjoy your little screw session with Dwighty-boy?' he asked annoyed but also cockily.

I just huffed and walked straight passed him and kept climbing up the stairs. 'It's not like that' I said sternly.

'Oh I'm sorry, did you not leave the compound to go screw his brains out in the woods?' he retorted smirking through his anger.

I stopped dead on the stairs and turned around to face him. 'Just stop' I said furiously.

'Well, just let me know next time and I'll arrange a pretty little fucking picnic for you two lovebirds!' he shouted.

We had now reached the top of the stairs and were finally at our corridor.

'You wanna know why the hell I went out there?! To clear my goddamn head because of you! To actually get some peace and quiet and the fact that I really scraped the fucking barrel by bringing Dwight, just shows how desperate I was to get away from you!' I yelled before walking down to my door.

He just stood there, looking at me silently as I faced against my door.

'Is that what you want?' he asked softly.

I sighed against my door, 'I don't know' I whispered.

He marched over to me and lightly grabbed my shoulder to spin me around. 'Have a drink with me. We can talk?' he asked.

I just nodded before following him to his room. This wasn't a good idea but lets face it, who could resist?

As we walked inside, he shut the door behind me and made us a couple drinks.

He only had bourbon in his room, but I needed something strong to take the edge off what I knew would be a difficult conversation.

I sat down on the sofa as he brought over the drinks, taking a seat opposite me.

I took a sip, squinting my eyes as the sharpness of the liquor hit the back of my throat. Negan chuckled at that.

'I don't know what to do' I said softly, my eyes tracing the glass.

'I can think of a couple things' he said smirking while taking another gulp.

I looked up at him faux warningly and said, 'I'm serious'.

'Alright, twenty questions because I am way too sober to talk normally about this with you' I added as I refilled our drinks.

'Alright, first question. Dwight', he said seriously and looking directly into my eyes for any trace of a response.

I hesitated before saying 'it didn't mean anything'.

'But you still fucking kissed the guy?' he retorted.

'What so i'm not allowed to kiss anybody but you're allowed to screw your wives and you expect me to just do nothing?!' I said with a raised voice.

He smirked and asked 'you jealous doll?'.

I took another large gulp of bourbon, not answering his question. 'Look, we both know where we stand. You can't give up your wives and I won't be with you unless you do, so where does that leave us?' I asked seriously.

He sighed, looking down and said 'can't we just ignore all of that shit and just focus on me and you?'.

'That's the problem, they are you, they come with you, you're a package deal! And I can't just betray my family over just becoming another one of your wives, not meaning a damn thing!' I responded with frustration in my voice.

'I get it' he said softly while standing up and placing his glass down onto the table. He smirked at me, raising out his hand and waiting for me to take it.

I looked up at him confused but slid my hand over his as he pulled me up from the sofa. 'What?' I asked softly.

He said nothing but leant down until our noses were practically touching. 'You could never mean nothing to me. God, what is this power you hold over me Molly?' he whispered against my lips.

I could feel his breathing and he slid his hands down from mine and placed them gently onto my waist, wrapping his arms around me and pulling me in closer.

I moved my hands up to around his shoulders as one of his hands drifted up my arm and caressed my neck, holding my chin in place with a finger.

This was our moment.

Every nerve ending in my body sparked as I felt his lips come closer to mine.

My entire body went numb and limp as his presence made me feel woozy. I wasn't drunk, but he sure made me feel like it.

Our eyes closed softly as we were engulfed in each other.

Both of us breathing heavily with anticipation and longing when suddenly he couldn't take it anymore and crashed his lips against mine.

They were softer than I expected, but they were strangely complimented with the coarseness of his stubble against my cheek.

Our lips moved in synchronicity with each other, hearing his moans at the feel of me on him turned me on.

His hands drifted down from my waist to my lower back before he started to move towards my ass.

I wrapped my arms around his neck and jumped up onto my tippy toes to reach more of him.

He of course wanted to take control of the kiss, his tongue battling mine for access as he flicked it against mine playfully.

I could literally feel him smile at the fact that he was in control.

So, I swiftly deepened the kiss by flicking my tongue against his and nipping at his lip which made him let out a low growl.

I smirked back as we fought for domination when suddenly he bent down, moving his hands from my ass to the back of my thighs, hoisting me up to straddle him.

I wrapped my legs around his waist as he pushed us against the wall, placing his hands against the wall so I wouldn't hurt my back.

It felt like a dream, I was so lost in the kiss until he thrusted forward, feeling him stiffen against me.

I smirked, raising my eyebrows as I heard him moan.

The feel of his hardness against me made me tingle all over with electricity as a pool of heat formed in me.

Wetness started to form as he carried on thrusting his body against mine.

His lips suddenly parted from mine as he kissed from my cheek, to my ear, before finally landing on my neck.

I tipped my head to the side as he licked and sucked on my sweet spot which he knew exactly where it was from last time, knowing the effect he already had on me.

Well, two could play at that game.

My eyes rolled back as my head rested against the wall, letting out a quiet moan.

He smirked at the effect he was having on me, 'you like that doll? he whispered into my ear, sucking on my lobe.

I just nodded, 'mhm' which escaped my lips breathlessly. I dipped my head down and pulled back his t shirt from his shoulder a little to reveal his tanned bare skin.

I pressed my lips gently at first to his shoulder, moving my way up to his neck, leaving soft little traces of kiss marks. He let out a louder moan as I felt him stiffen further beneath me.

I wrapped my arms around him tighter as a wetness pooled within me, letting out a moan just as there was a knock on the door.

I looked up, eyes widened as Negan just nestled his head into my neck. I stroked his hair as he sighed and shouted 'what?' in frustration.

'Sorry to bother you sir, but there's an a situation with Rick's group' Simon shouted from the other side of the door.

Negan looked up at me and bit his lip in frustration, I just smirked.

'Goddamn it' he said softly, slowly placing me back down onto the ground.

He cupped my face in his hands and gently pressed his lips against mine.

Negan put on his jacket before saying 'I'm sorry darlin' and opened the door.

'Si, this better be one hell of an fucking emergency' Negan growled at Simon who just looked at him, then me before replying 'it is sir'.

'Well, I'm gonna need one hell of cold shower now' he said looking back at me and chuckled.

He told Simon to wait and closed the door slightly on him as he walked back over to me.

'To be continued...' he whispered as he lightly pressed his lips against mine before smirking and walking out.

I stood there, alone in his room.

I wanted to scream with excitement, pinching myself to see if it was real.

We had kissed, finally.

I looked around his room before flinging myself down onto his bed.

The dark silk sheets felt so soft against my skin, almost cool to the touch which was a relief seen as it was still hot out.

I laid there, looking at the chandelier on the ceiling, taking in the aroma of his scent on the pillows.

It could have been the alcohol, or the fact that I hadn't slept well the past few nights but my eyes felt heavy. I promised myself that I would just close my eyes for a few minutes seen as Negan would probably be back in an hour.

As I started to feel myself become aware of my surroundings again, lying on my side, I felt an arm wrapped around me and breathing against my hair.

I frowned in confusion and as I turned around slowly I saw Negan.

He was just in his t-shirt and black lounge pants, nuzzling against my neck whilst he spooned me.

We had the covers over us and feeling me roll over, Negan awoke. 'You okay darlin?' he asked half asleep. I just smiled to myself and turned back over.

I mumbled quietly a soft 'mhm' as he wrapped his arms tighter around me not wanting me to leave.

There was something about lying there in his arms, it felt so safe and comfortable like we'd know each other for years.

Content and safe, I drifted back to sleep.

The next morning...

The sunlight beamed through the window in front of the bed.

I squinted, rolled around waking myself up and rubbed my eyes.

When I came to, I rolled over to see that Negan wasn't there.

I rolled back over frowning to see that Lucille was propped over on his chair with his leather jacket. Knowing him he would never leave his room without them.

But, maybe this had just been a one time thing...

Just as I was contemplating his whereabouts, suddenly his bathroom door swung open as he walked out wearing nothing but a white fluffy towel around his waist.

Steam seemed to fall around him as he strolled out, clean shaven and his hair damp and slicked back.

My mouth dropped open to see his tanned toned torso covered with tattoos and his chest hair glistening in the sun.

He caught me staring at him while I lay back on the bed.

He smirked at the trance I was in, 'mornin doll' he said with a hoarse voice.

'Morning' I said smiling sweetly.

He looked me up and down, biting his lip before waltzing over to me.

He smiled, bent down and kissed me gently. 'You are so damn beautiful you know that?' he said before throwing on a t-shirt.

I was mesmerised by him as I smiled back at him, 'since when did you get so sweet?' I replied mockingly.

He chuckled and replied 'must be your influence'.

A serious look grew across my face as I looked down avoiding his gaze. 'So what did Simon want last night?' I asked nonchalantly.

He looked back up at me as he pulled up his pants, 'he wanted to show me the plans for the crops we'll be plantin' at Alexandria and Hilltop' he said avoiding my gaze.

'So, they agreed?' I asked anxiously as I sat up.

'Uh huh. Lucky for you we'll be lightening the pricks load' he replied while throwing on his jacket and picking up Lucille.

I smiled up at him gratefully.

'You ready?' he asked as I stood up stretching.

'For where?' I asked grabbing my jacket.

'To pay Rick a little visit' he said seriously and opened the door.

'Alexandria? You're letting me go back?' I asked confused by his sudden interest in me going with him.

'Yup, figured you'd want to see your family' he said softly.

I just looked at him for a minute in awe of how genuinely nice he was being.

'Wow, I have melted your heart after all' I said smirking before wrapping my arms around his neck and pulling him into a kiss.

'Hey, i've got a reputation to uphold' he said smirking back.

Negan's POV//

~flashback to last night~

'This better be fucking good Si because now I've got one hell of a case of blue balls' I said strutting in front of him.

'It is, apparently Rick hasn't been keeping to the gun quota, seems like those pricks have some more stashed away' he replied marching behind me.

'Well, looks like we're gonna have to pay Rick and his merry band of pricks a little visit again' I said smiling down at Simon.

'He broke yet?' I asked seriously, referring to Daryl.

'Not yet, but it won't be long now' Simon replied happily.

'Good, crank it up a notch will ya while I'm gone' I said patting him on the shoulder before sauntering down the hallway whistling as I went.

'Dwighty-boy, I need you to make sure that Daryl is broken by the time I get back. Whip out the photos to make things really suck ass' I said shouting over to Dwight who was in the corridor.

'You know what, since your doing such a fucking great job with Daryl, you wanna little blast from the past with you know who?' I said throwing Lucille over my shoulder, teasing him. He looked scared shitless.

'I'm kidding man lighten up. Nah, pick whoever as long as she says yes' I said smirking. He didn't reply.

'What? Ah shit is it...is it not working down there? Your penis? Cus that guy, well he chomped on it!' I chuckled.

That one was to get back at him for Molly.

'I'd rather get the job finished first' D said nervously.

'But, I just said that it's happy hour at the pussy bar and Dwight eats for free and you're telling me no?' I said frowning.

'I-I haven't earned it yet. I want to do it' he replied anxiously.

I chuckled at seeing him squirm, 'that's my boy!' I said patting him on the shoulder before I walked off to the meeting to plan Rick's demise. A boring ass meeting and I couldn't wait to get back to my gal.

'Later fellas, my girl's probably in bed waiting for me' I said winking at Dwight as I walked out of the room.

He must have thought I meant Sherry, what if he was thinkin' about Molly? She was mine, no doubt about it.

I swear, just thinking about screwing her I knew I could never get bored. Goddamn just thinking about how perfect she is and a fucking badass. I want her by my side, I mean I like screwing Frankie and Amber but I don't need them like I need Molly.

Fuck, I was getting soft and I wasn't about to lose what I'd fucking built just for one girl when I have six of them waiting for me at all hours of the day.

Then it hit me, opening that door and seeing her lying there. So peaceful, so goddamn beautiful. Fuck, she was an angel and she was asleep in my bed. She trusts me.

I crept around the room, trying not to wake her, got changed and then slipped the covers over her to keep her warm as I wrapped my arms around her.

Her skin was so soft and smooth, her hair smelt like her, sweet and floral. I didn't just want her, I needed her, forever and only her.

She had already asked me to leave my wives and I actually wanted to but they're part of my image and if I had a real wife, it would ruin my reputation.

I don't think I've ever cared about someone this much since Lucille passed away.

But I was weak when I was with her. So, I now knew that no matter how much I needed Molly, I had to let her go because I could never be what she wants.

[takeiteasypeasybaby]

Save Me: Chapter 15 - Would you die for me?

~Hey Guys! This is Chapter 15 of Save Me❤️ I can’t believe we’re already at 15 chapters and everyone’s support has made this possible so thank you all!! Molly is devastated as she encounters Negan’s cruelty first hand, causing her to question her ever-becoming real feelings for him. I hope you enjoy and Chapter 16 is out on Wednesday ❤️🤟🏻~

Molly had finally gotten what she'd wanted for the longest time, a chance to see her family again. Little did she know that this reunion would be far from sweet.

'What time are we going?' I asked as we strolled down the hallway together.

'3:00pm, I've got a couple things to do before we go but we can spend the morning together' he replied smirking.

He spun around, propped Lucille against the wall and pulled me in for a kiss.

I smiled and giggled 'oh, is this what we do now?' I whispered against his lips mockingly.

He chuckled and whispered gruffly, 'oh yeah'.

We moved over to lean against the wall as I moved my lips against his passionately.

'Wait, not here' he growled as he pulled me down a dark corridor.

His hands drifted to my waist as he firmly pressed me against the wall and raised my arms above my head.

I moaned as his fingers traced up and down my bare arms until his fingers interlocked with mine as he held me there.

He pressed his body against mine, feeling his warmth rush through me.

I so badly wanted to touch him but I immediately surrendered to his touch when his kisses travelled along my neck, nibbling and licking at my bare flesh.

My eyes closed as I rested my head against the wall with a smile across my face.

I noticed his kisses getting less frequent and I opened my eyes as he frowned and pulled away.

'What is it?' I asked frowning with concern.

He sighed deeply until he said 'I need to tell you something'.

I waited anxiously for him to continue, 'right now?' I asked in frustration.

'We gotta make Rick and the others stand down and there needs to be punishment, you know that' he said seriously.

I pulled back from him, 'what do mean punishment?' I asked sternly.

'Lucille's gotta get her three, then we can move forward with a new understanding' he replied nonchalantly.

My eyes began to well up as I looked at him, he was deadly serious.

I pushed him off me and said sternly 'no one has to die'.

'You are wrong Molly, punishment? can't do anything without that. Punishment is how we built everything we have. I thought you got that?' he said with a raised voice.

How the hell did we just go from making out up against a wall to arguing again?!

'I get that, really I do. But they're my family. No has to die' I repeated slowly.

'Okay, how bout this. One, just one' he replied softly.

'Fine. But I get to pick' I stated coldly.

He looked at me intensely until his lips formed a smile.

'Alright, who'll it be?' he asked seriously.

I took a minute before deciding, 'Spencer Monroe' I said looking back up at him with determination.

He smirked and asked 'why?'.

'He's weak and entitled. He put the group at risk too many times' I said angrily as I reflected.

He just nodded as he agreed.

'I am sorry it has to be this way darlin’. You know I'd never want to put you through this if it could be avoided' he said touching his forehead against mine.

I closed my eyes, feeling closer to him than ever, yet so unbelievably far away.

Alexandria - Rosita's POV//

His hands were wrapped around me as I woke, ugh I can't believe I did that last night, and with him.

I would never be over Abraham. Spencer, though he was hot was a distraction and an asshole.

I managed to wriggle out of his grasp and grab my clothes off of the floor, as I was getting dressed Rick radio'ed us saying we needed to meet at the gates in five.

I chucked a pillow at him, 'Spencer!' I shouted.

He mumbled and rubbed his eyes as he woke, 'what?'.

'Get up. Meeting by the gate' I said with a hint of anger. Mostly at myself.

'Last night was fun' he said chuckling as he pulled up his pants.

'Uh huh' I said as I grabbed my gun and headed out.

'Bye then' he shouted after me. I just rolled my eyes, this hangover was worse than ever.

'Alright listen up. Negan is coming today and we don't want any conflict so just do as he says so he'll leave faster. That means moving all of the supplies out to the gate ready for their pick up' Rick shouted so everyone gathered around could here.

I gave Rick a scowl, why the hell was he being so complacent? It honestly felt like Michonne and I were the only ones actually giving a shit.

As we stood at the gates, Eugene was on watch and shouted there was a figure approaching.

Thinking it was Negan, people started to panic.

‘Oh my good gracious, she's back' he boomed down to us.

I smiled knowing exactly who had returned to us. Tara.

She waltzed in past the gates, wearing orange shades, like she'd been on vacation.

She ran over to me, pulling me in for a hug before she went over to Rick and the others.

'Where's Heath?' I asked confusedly.

'We got separated. A hoard were all around us and he bolted' she said defeatedly.

'What a dick' I replied to which Tara just smiled weakly.

'Where's Molly and Denise?' she asked excitedly.

I looked down for a second before breaking the news.

'Tara...Molly's with the Saviours, she has been for a while now. But...Denise, she um, a saviour killed her' I said with sorrow in my eyes.

She looked down, tears flowing down her face. 'So what? Are we doing nothing?! How have the Saviours taken two of the people that mean the most to me?!' she shouted through the tears.

'I'm sorry Tara. But they killed Glenn and Abraham. Now we have to provide for them, for Negan, he's their leader' I spoke while turning to Rick who was heartbroken.

Tara said nothing, she just turned and ran for her house.

When I found her, she was sitting on the floor in her kitchen, looking at a doctor bobble head.

'I'm sorry Tara' I said, my voice catching in my throat.

'I'm sorry too' she said wearily and breathing deeply.

'We don't have to just sit here. Guns? Ammunition? You don't have any leads?' I asked.

Tara looked up at me now.

I stormed over to her, bending down in front of her, 'anything, anywhere, I don't care how dangerous it looked. Just tell me a place and i'll go' I pleaded.

'There's gotta be somewhere' I said, tears falling down my face.

I sighed, 'we can square this, we can make this right'.

She looked down, looking at her locket.

'We can't. I didn't see anything like that out there' she said softly.

I sighed in frustration. 'Stay here while Negan comes, don't put yourself through that' I said touching her shoulder before walking away.

She just nodded in agreement.

Molly's POV//

That journey felt like the longest one yet. Butterflies filled my stomach as I anticipated seeing my family.

Questions circling my mind, clouding my concentration:

What would they think of me?

Would they hate me?

Was Tara back?

Was she okay?

Had I picked right?

All these thoughts flooded my brain.

I was angry at him, but I also understood.

If Rick had been in this position, he would have killed them all. I know he would...he did at the outpost.

Negan turned to me briefly before focusing back on the road, 'you okay darlin? I know this is tough' he said softly.

'I'm fine' I said hastily as I turned around to look out of the window.

I was anything but fine. I only hoped that they wouldn't sense our relationship.

Before too long, I spotted the gates in the distance. My home, Alexandria.

It was sunny that day, although it felt like it should have been raining.

As soon as we stopped at the gates, and they let us through, I could see everyone working away like nothing had changed. That wasn't true of course, everything had changed and I didn't know whether it was for the better.

There was a pile of supplies by the gates which made Negan chuckle 'god, they're eager this week aren't they?' he said. I was silent.

Negan jumped out first, swinging Lucille over his shoulder, as did the other Saviours.

I sat in the truck for a couple seconds, breathing heavily. I had to do this.

I jumped out, putting my gun into its holster and held my locket in between my fingers nervously.

Negan sensed how I was feeling and came over to me, but I immediately stepped away from him not wanting anyone to see.

When he was caring like this, I almost forgot that everything between us was just a game. On my part it had to be, I could never let myself truly have feelings for such a man. But on his part, I wondered how real his feelings were, or whether my partiality towards him simply meant loyalty to his Saviours and not Rick.

He was hurt at this but shot me a look of understanding.

'Alright people, let's get this show on the fucking road. I want all houses checked for guns and a list of inventory taken. Arat come with me and Molly' he said striding out in front of me.

I gulped. All residents looked at Negan, then at me with their eyes a little wider when we made eye contact.

Some thought me his prisoner, I'm sure. But, I kept my composure as we walked through Alexandria.

Rick wasn't here which was odd. Neither was Michonne or Maggie.

All of a sudden a gunshot fired out of nowhere.

'Stop right there or the next one goes in you' Carl shouted walking over to us.

Negan chuckled as he turned round to see him 'of course, really kid?' he said smiling.

'You should go, before you find out how dangerous we all are' Carl said scowling at Negan.

I was stood directly behind, but when I stepped out Carl saw me and scowled.

'Well pardon me young man, excuse the shit out of my goddamn french but did you just threaten me?' Negan replied, slightly amused by the situation.

'We're taking half of your shit, and half is what I say it is' Negan said sternly.

'Molly?' Carl said, his voice catching in his throat.

I just looked at him with tears filling in my eyes, before I pushed them back.

'Where's Rick?' I asked sternly.

'Out getting supplies' he replied softly as he frowned at my behaviour.

I just nodded.

Negan smiled before looking at me to see how I was doing.

'Alright well, we'll just wait till he gets back. You gonna take us on the grand tour kid?' he said smirking at Carl.

Carl huffed and scowled before striding out in front towards their house. This was more painful than I ever imagined.

As soon as we got there, Negan wanted to see every single damn room in their house, which included Judith's nursery.

'Oh my, look at this little angel' Negan said smiling as he went in and lifted her up, holding her against his chest.

Carl looked super uncomfortable, but when Negan looked at me it was a strange feeling.

Seeing him holding Judith made me wonder whether he would be a good father, he seemed like a natural.

I couldn't help but smile when he looked straight at me with that meaningful look he does.

He was intent on holding Judith while we sat in the kitchen. He bounced her on his knee, made silly faces at her which made her giggle.

I smiled at him, he was so good with kids.

Arat stood outside, like a guard.

We heard her shouting 'no!' outside so we decided to see what was going on.

Negan handed Judith to Carl as he opened the door. 'Don't be an asshole Arat. Let the man pass' he said playfully.

Spencer came stomping up this stairs with a glass of bourbon in his hand.

'Oh, crap. Is that for me?' Negan said smiling.

'We haven't officially met, I'm Spencer Monroe' he said smirking.

Negan looked back at me and winked, then gestured to him to have a seat out on the porch.

I stood in the doorway looking at them.

Spencer just looked at me suspiciously.

'Running water, air conditioning, a housewarming gift?' That settles it, I am getting myself a vacation home here' Negan said smiling.

'Cheers to that' Spencer replied as they clinked glasses.

Negan took a sip of bourbon, 'mmm. Oh, that is good. You know the only thing missing is a pool table' Negan said raising his eyebrows.

'Nothing better than a good game of eight ball' he added.

'House across the street has one in the garage' Spencer said cockily.

'Oh, Spencer. I do believe you may just be my new best friend' Negan said chuckling.

Jesus Christ, just get it over with already! I thought, scowling at the pair of them.

They got some men to lift the pool table into the middle of the street.

'I could never do this with Rick, he would just be standing there scowling, giving me that annoying side-eye he gives me' Negan said while reading up his cue.

'That's actually what I came to see you about. I wanted to talk to you about Rick' Spencer said with determination.

Negan looked at me standing by him before saying, 'Alright, talk to me Spencer'.

'I get what you're trying to do here, I'm not saying that I agree with your methods, but I get it. You're building a network, you're making people contribute for the greater good. It makes sense' Spencer said so everyone around could hear him.

Rosita and Tara came out, hearing the commotion. I looked around to see her.

'But you should know, Rick Grimes has a history of not working well with others' Spencer added.

'Is that so?' Negan answered.

Rosita saw me first and I felt the pain in her eyes as she held Tara back from running towards me.

I looked at Tara, before looking towards Negan. She immediately understood, and saw me as on his side. I wanted so badly to run to her, but Negan didn't know I had a sister alive and as much as I wanted to trust him, I couldn't.

I just touched my locket and she knew how much I loved her.

We always did that, if we couldn't say it, we held our lockets in our hands. Tara, seeing me hold it she held hers in response. I smiled slightly looking down, before looking back at Negan to make sure he hadn't seen.

'Rick wasn't the original leader here, my mom was' Spencer said confidently.

'She was doing a really good job of it. Then she died, not long after Rick showed up, same with my brother, same with my dad' he continued resentfully.

I looked over to see Carl standing talking to Olivia. She was the one who looked after our food supply. Carl looked happier so I knew Rick must have returned, hopefully with Michonne.

'So everything was peachy here, for what? Years? And then Rick shows up and suddenly you're an orphan? That is the saddest story I've ever heard' Negan said with an air of sincerity.

'Good thing for you, he's not in charge anymore' Negan said smiling.

'Doesn't matter. His ego's out of control' Spencer replied.

I scowled at him for speaking about Rick like that and Negan noticed.

'He'll find a way to screw things up and take over' Spencer whined.

'What exactly are you proposing be done about that?' Negan asked.

'I am my mother's son. I can be the leader she was' Spencer said confidently.

Negan leaned in, smiling and said 'so I should put you in charge, that's what your saying?'.

'We'd be much better off' Spencer added.

'So, what are you thinking?' Spencer asked Negan.

'I'm thinking about how Rick clearly hates my guts, but he is out there right now, gathering shit for me to make sure I don't hurt any of these fine people that live here. That takes guts. Then there's you, the guy who waited for Rick to be gone, to get me to do his dirty work, so he could take Rick's place. Why not just kill Rick yourself?' Negan asked.

Negan moved closer to Spencer before whispering 'you know what I'm thinkin?'.

He exhaled, 'It's because you've got no guts' Negan whispered before drawing out a knife and slitting his stomach open.

Everyone was in shock. I gasped at what he just did.

'How embarrassing, there they are. You did have guts, I've never been so wrong in my entire life!' Negan shouted while smiling. He was enjoying this.

'Anyone wanna finish the game? C'mon. I was winning' he said smiling.

No one made a move. Suddenly Rosita pulled out her gun and took a shot directly at Negan.

I lunged forward. Negan looked at Lucille who how had a bullet.

‘Shit, what the shit?!' Negan yelled as Arat tackled Rosita to the ground.

What the hell?!

'Shit! You just- You just try to kill me?!' Negan screamed hovering Lucille over her.

'You shot Lucille!' he yelled.

'She got in the way' Rosita said breathlessly.

Negan looked at me while I shook my head, 'don't' I mouthed.

He calmed down slightly before picking up the bullet casing.

'What is this?' he asked, 'This little bad boy made from scratch? Look at those crimps' he said while admiring the bullet.

'This was homemade' Negan said softly. Eugene was terrified. Of course he'd made it.

'You may be stupid, but you showed some real ingenuity here' Negan whispered as Arat held a knife to Rosita's throat.

'Arat, move that knife up. Out onto that girl's face' Negan said sternly.

I scowled at him.

'Lucille's beautiful smooth surface will never be the same again, so why should yours!' he yelled. 'Unless...you tell me who made this' he said holding up the casing.

Arat started to dig the knife into Rosita's cheek. I shot her a look of pleading.

'It was me, I made it' Rosita said confidently

'You see, now I just think your lying' Negan said smirking down at her.

'It was me' Rosita said leaning up to cut herself with the knife.

'Oh! You are such a badass!' Negan chuckled.

'Arat, kill somebody' Negan said seriously this time. He couldn't look at me, he just looked at the ground.

'No! It was me!' Rosita screamed.

Arat spun around and shot Olivia in the eye. She was dead instantly.

A single tear rolled down my cheek. Tara gasped as I looked over at her.

Suddenly, Rick came walking over with Aaron over his shoulder, Aaron looked like he'd been beat up badly.

Rick looked at me in surprise before marching over to Negan, 'we had an agreement!' Rick spat.

'Rick! Look everybody its Rick! Ah your people are making me lose my voice doin all this yelling' Negan shouted excitedly.

'How about a thank you? I mean, I know we started off this relationship on the wrong fucking foot but how about a little credit? Is that too much to ask?' Negan said to Rick scowling.

'Your shit is waiting for you at the gate, just go' Rick said hoarsely.

'Sure thing Rick, right after I find the gal or guy that made this bullet' Negan said smiling.

'It was me' Tara shouted.

I lunged over to her putting myself in front of her, 'no!' I shouted.

Negan looked at me frowning in confusion. Now he knew.

Arat aimed at me just as Eugene spoke up, 'it was me' he said nervously.

'It required one spent casing one four-holed turret reloader, powder, one funnel for the powder-' Eugene said hastily.

'Shut up' Negan whispered, leaning into him. 'I believe you' Negan added softly.

He scowled down at Rosita, then back up at me still protecting Tara. I held my hand behind me for her to take. She held my hand, shaking like a leaf. I was steady now.

'I'm gonna be relieving you of your bullet maker Rick, that and whatever you left for me at the gate' he said frustratedly.

'Whatever you scavenged, it's not enough because you are still in a serious, serious hole after today. Let's move out!' he yelled.

'No! Please just take me' Rosita screamed.

Negan looked at me, nodding to go. I spun round to Tara, tears in my eyes.

'Be strong for me, okay?' I whispered rubbing away her tears. I smiled at her as she pulled me in for a hug.

'I'm so happy you're back and you're safe' I said softly.

I let go of her and walked towards Negan who was waiting for me, scowling.

I turned back around and held my locket, she smiled weakly and did the same.

Rick stopped me as I walked past, 'I'm okay' I whispered to him. Rick let go instantly.

Once I had caught up with Negan we walked, side by side, in silence.

It was the same way the journey home. I just wanted to sleep and cry. I couldn't even look at him right now, he promised me one and he killed two and harmed one.

He tried to reach out his hand across to my seat in the truck but I just shifted away to look out of the window to see Tara and Rosita stood there watching me leave.

When we got back, Negan held the door open for me and held out his hand like I was some princess. I was no princess, just an animal in captivity.

I hopped straight out and nudged his hand out of the way with my body as I charged past him, not even looking at him.

He said nothing, didn't even try to hold me back.

As soon as I was out of sight, I ran as fast as my legs could carry me all the way up to my room and I cried myself to sleep that night. To think, I had slept next to him the night before.

The next morning...

I didn't speak to Eugene until the next morning when I walked straight past the main hall, knowing Negan would be in there, and headed for the armoury.

The armoury had an extension where there were tools for fixing weapons and now bullet making.

I opened the door to see Eugene sat down, sorting through the casings. He looked different to last night, like he was content.

'Hey' I said softly.

'Hello Molly' he replied, still engrossed in his work.

'I'm so sorry Eugene. How are you doing?' I asked.

'Hunky-dory' he replied curtly.

'Eugene, do you not wanna talk about what happened yesterday?' I asked confused by his manner.

'I have a good set up here, Negan gave me a large bedroom and a jar of pickles. I must concur I am satisfied' he said lightly.

I shot him a frown. 'He what?' I said, my voice getting louder.

'Yup, safe to say he has made me very comfortable. Looks like I am Negan after all, just like you' he said now looking at me.

I scowled, 'I am not, nor will I ever be Negan. Why the hell are you?!' I shouted, he became more nervous now.

'I am grateful to be alive Molly. Being useful, it's one of life's greatest pleasures' he said now fiddling with casings.

'How much do you really know about these?' I said, taking a deep breath and picking one up and admiring it.

'A fair amount' he responded.

'So...you could accidentally make some that don't work?' I whispered looking at him slyly. He looked up at me, shocked.

'I can't let anyone else die Eugene' I pleaded.

'Negan will inspect every one' he replied.

'Then hide them, do anything, I don't care. I don't want to kill him, I just need him stopped and I can't do that without you Eugene' I begged.

He looked me over before saying, 'I am Negan. I will not betray him' and then asked me to leave.

I couldn’t believe what I was hearing so I just stared at him in shock for a couple of seconds before I dazily walked out of the room. Eugene was a coward but he was not an idiot, so I couldn’t believe that in less than a day he was already on Negan’s side. So, it looked like I would have to stop Negan myself and seeing my sister motivated me to do whatever that it took...

[takeiteasypeasybaby]

Save Me: Chapter 21 - You Loved Me

~Hey Guys! Chapter 21 is out ❤️ Molly and Negan come to terms with their separation while conflict with Rick escalates...I hope you all enjoy and chapter 22 will be out on Wednesday! Love you all and stay safe 🤟🏻~

Molly and Negan are overwhelmed by their memories of each other as they both face difficulties since their separation, both of them wrangling with their 'weakness'.

Negan's POV//

'I swear to fuck, if you don't hurry the fuck up Doc, I will feed you to Lucille' I yelled in frustration.

He was taking way to fucking long to patch me up.

The bullet hole was clean but I would need stitches, at least she had done me that kindness.

I clenched my jaw at every stitch, every ounce of pain brought her flooding back to me.

Every week, I got checked over by the Doc to see if I was healing right.

But every time he peeled off my bandages, I saw her, she was walking through the main hall, smiling when she looked at me, like an angel.

I had had that vision for many weeks since she left me, always the same and every time I ran to her she vanished.

When did I become so soft? Was it her? Did she do this to me?

I scowled as I dazed, Carson now frantically finishing up with my wound.

'All done sir' he said meekly, this snapped me back into the present.

Simon now stood in the doorway, 'Negan, we're going on a supply run today. We can find Molly for ya?' he said confidently.

'No, it's a waste of time. We have to focus, because Rick, the Widow and Dreds are teaming up. So, I think it's time we pay another visit' I said smiling at him.

He scowled at my response, 'There's another thing...the girl who broke in last week, what's the plan?' he said.

'She's got guts, I like that. Keep her alive, she's valuable' I replied sternly.

He started to turn around when I stopped him, 'Oh and Si, I'm now in need of a new right-hand man' I said sternly.

'It would be an honour sir' he replied.

I faux smirked at him as he nodded and walked away.

Simon's POV//

I nodded curtly at his response. He's weak.

I walked out of Carson's office and headed down to the main hall to gather up some guys.

Fuck his plan, it's time we had real leadership.

I grabbed Keith and told him to instruct the other guys that Negan wanted them to find Molly and kill her or they would be killed.

He nodded nervously and marched hastily over to the other guys who were in agreement.

She was a threat to all of us, everything we had built. Everything I had built.

I wasn't gonna let that bitch ruin what I had.

She made Negan weak and as long as she was dead, I would be safe.

I had everything back in my grasp.

Molly's POV//

The bike had ran out of gas, so now I had to go on foot.

My thigh still ached, but I had found a house a while back which had a needle and thread which I used to sow up the wound.

I now walked through seemingly endless fields, I couldn't see anymore houses and I was low on canned food.

Suddenly out of the trees came four walkers, all snarling and leering towards me.

I felt no fear, in fact it felt strangely comforting to be back to my normal.

I grabbed my knives out of their cases and waited for the walkers to come closer.

I stabbed one in the head, while another came round to my side.

I ducked and tripped it over and plunged my knife into its skull.

I pushed the other one onto the other, they fell backwards against a tree.

Slashing my knife at their skulls, which were lined up and it plunged through both of them.

It hadn't hit me until all of them lay there, lifeless on the grass that waves of guilt and sorrow swarmed through my body.

I broke down, my knees weakening as I fell to the ground.

I could barely breathe, visions and memories of Glenn and Abraham invaded my mind.

I had never felt like this, weak and vulnerable. He had made me weak.

I grasped at my chest to steady my breathing, when my hand made contact with the metal chain around my neck.

My locket, I turned it over to reveal my initials M.C.

I thought of Tara instantly, I couldn't give up or lose faith. That place had weakened me but not broken me.

I smiled weakly as I thought of her, tears rolling down my face. I sighed deeply as the sun started to set. I needed to find shelter.

So, I carried on.

I walked for hours, until I decided to stop next to a tree.

I was weary, my energy draining out of me as I slid my back down against the tree, sinking to the ground.

There was no one around me so I rested my eyes for a few seconds.

I drifted in and out of consciousness when I heard a faint snarl coming from behind me.

When the realisation hit, my eyes opened wide as I spun around to see a walker lurching over me.

It gargled and snarled and fell on top of me as I struggled underneath.

I held it just off my face as it snapped at my cheek, its arms trying to claw at my neck.

As I tackled it and threw it off me, I straddled it and reached for my knife.

It grabbed at my necklace which was dangling in front of me as I stabbed it in its head.

I grabbed my rucksack and ran seeing a hoard of walkers approach from out of the trees.

Not even realising that I had lost my locket.

I walked a couple more miles until I saw a small village in the distance. My heart lifted.

Thank god, I thought.

All the shops and houses looked virtually empty, I doubted that there would be any useful supplies but it was safer to be inside at night.

I picked the closest one, it was the smallest beige one so it probably had less stuff but also less walkers inside.

I peeled open the door, keeping my gun steadily in my hand. I checked over every room, including upstairs.

Nothing. No walkers in sight and a cupboard with a few cans of dog food.

Memories of that cell came flooding in. I shuck it off and opened one.

I struggled to keep it down but it was better than starving.

There were papers everywhere, with torn sheets and cracks in the windows.

I placed my rucksack under my head and curled myself up.

Tears rolled down my face as I thought about him.

His warm soft bed, cuddling up with him. It felt like someone had torn out my heart.

I pushed those thoughts out of my head when I thought of Maggie. This was my fault.

What if I had said something which made him kill them? What if I was nicer to him in the beginning? I couldn't face her.

I wanted to be there to comfort her, but how could I knowing what I did?

Maybe I couldn't go back home. Maybe I never would.

A couple days later...

Negan's POV//

'All points are covered. Every contingency is already met. I come armed with two barrels of the truth. A test is upon you, and I'm giving out a cheat sheet' Eugene bellowed into a megaphone as we rolled up.

Eugene spoke to Rick first.

'H-Hello, I come salved with the hope that it is my dropped knowledge that you heed. Options are zero to none. Compliance and fealty are your only escape. Bottom lining it, you may thrive, or you may die' Eugene continued.

I sat back, scanning the people at the gates. Tara was there, but not her.

'Where's Negan' Rick yelled.

'I'm Negan' he said worriedly. I smirked at his loyalty.

Rick ducked down suddenly, they tried to fucking blow us up!

Rick tried to reach for his gun but the trash people beat them to it. They had betrayed them for us.

They opened the gates and I stepped out with Simon and the others.

I smirked at Eugene and flung an arm around him. My boy!

I stepped out in front of Rick, smiling at him.

'You ever hear the one about a stupid little prick named Rick, who thought he knew shit but didn't know shit, and got everyone he gave a shit about killed?' I yelled.

I pointed at him saying 'it's about you Rick!'

'You're all gonna wanna put your guns down now' I said sternly.

I still scanned over all of them, checking to see if she was there. What if she hadn't made it?

'No one drops anything' Rick said weakly.

'We had a deal' Rick whispered to Jadis, 'Tamil came for the boat things. Followed ones who took. Made a better deal' she replied.

I'd tried so fucking hard to save them and this is how he repays me?!

'You push me, and you push me and you push me Rick! You just tried to blow us up right? I mean I get me, my people. But Eugene? He's one of yours, and after what he did - he stepped up' I bellowed.

'You people...are animals, universe gives you a sign and you just shove your finger right up its ass!' I said while flipping off Rick.

Daryl glared at Dwight.

'Dwight, Simon, chop chop' I shouted pointing at the crate. They went over immediately and unwrapped it.

Oh boy did they have a surprise coming! They would be getting back one of their own!

They brought out the coffin and placed it upright. I looked over to see Tara, she must have thought it was Molly.

I scowled at her memory.

'So you don't like Eugene anymore. You guys gotta like Sasha! I do too' I said smiling and tapping on the coffin with Lucille.

'Got her right here, packaged for your convenience, alive and well. Now I brought her, so I wouldn't have to kill all of you, and not killing all of you could get complicated. See, I know theres a lot of firepower left in there Rick! So I'm gonna make this simple, I want all the guns you've managed to scrape up' I smiled at him.

Then scowled at his brief upper-hand, 'yep, I know about those too'.

'I want every last grain of lemonade you got left', I continued, just wanting an excuse to see if Molly was in one of those houses.

'I want a person, of your own choosing for Lucille!' I said as I pointed to her.

They now looked scared shitless.

'Daryl, ooh I gotta get my Daryl back!' I said looking at him and smirking.

How in the hell did that prick even escape?

'I see you' I said smirking while pointing to him. That would break Rick even more.

'The pool table and all the pool cues and the chalk, and I want it now or Sasha dies! Then all of you...probably' I said standing next to the coffin.

Rick was silent still.

'C'mon Rick, just because I brought her in a casket doesn't mean she has to leave in it' I said.

He didn't respond.

For fuck sake. I sighed and rubbed my forehead in frustration.

Molly already hated me, she would hate me even more if I killed anyone else. But I couldn't be weak.

'You know what? You suck ass Rick, you really do. I don't wanna have to kill her, but thats exactly what you're gonna make me do' I yelled.

Rick stepped forward, 'let me see her' he replied calmly.

'Alright, just give me a second. I might have to get her up to speed. Can't hear shit inside this thing' I replied.

I whacked Lucille against it, 'Sash, you're not gonna believe this crap' I said as I opened the door slowly.

She growled and snarled at me as she came out.

'Holy goddamn!' I said as she pushed me off the truck. She fucking killed herself.

I heard gunfire all around me.

They were taking out the trash people and some of mine.

'Ah, honey. Goddamn it!' I said as I struggled to get her off of me. She snapped and tried to bite at my face.

Jeff managed to pull her off of me but got bit in the process.

So, I grabbed Simon and retreated behind the truck.

'Ahhhh! Plan B it is!' I said as the trash people managed to wound Rick as I grabbed Carl.

I didn't want to do this, he had potential.

I knelt him down as my guys surrounded him. Jadis brought Rick over to me.

'Hello again' I said as I took Lucille from Dwight. Jadis made him kneel next to the boy.

'Well, shit Rick. You just couldn't stick with us, huh?' I said slightly amused at his efforts.

'You had to go with these filthy garbage people? No offence' I said now looking at Jadis.

'Deal is for twelve, yes?' she said.

'Ten. People are a resource' I replied.

'Twelve' she argued, she reminded me of Molly. But she wasn't.

'Ten' she conceded. I smirked at her subservience.

I sighed, 'Rick. This is just gonna make you sad. Broken. You're gonna wish you we're dead. I like having fun, I do. Maybe you think that the guy who did what he did to your friends wasn't me, like that was some sort of a put-on' I said, now moving round to Carl.

A part of me wished that wasn't me.

'Oh shit. Maybe this is on me. Maybe this is all on me. I gotta make it right. I guess I gotta start all over again' I said sternly, now looking at Carl.

'I gotta tell you Rick, if I had a kid, I'd want him to be just like your kid', sadness twinged in my gut as I said that.

'You're not gonna win' Carl said looking up at me, 'Carl, It is over' I said warningly.

'Why don't you point your one ball up the street and take it all in? I said crouching beside him.

Suddenly, there came a scream as a woman fell off one of the buildings. The look on Rick's face, he must have known her.

'Oh, wow. You just lost somebody important to you, like just now. Jesus, that is timing' I said crouching now in front of Rick.

He was shaking and tearing up.

'Well, Rick...you chose this. I truly don't know what more I could've done to warn you. This isn't a warning, this is punishment. I'm gonna kill Carl now' I said scowling at him.

'I'm gonna make it one nice hard swing because I like him. I just want you to put that in your brain and roll it around for a minute. I'm gonna kill Carl, and then, Lucille here, she's gonna take your hands' I said holding her up in front of his face.

He looked unaffected by what I just said.

'You can do it right in front of me, you can take my hands. I told you already, I'm gonna kill you, all of you. Nothing is gonna change that, nothing. You're all already dead' he whispered in my ear.

I scowled at him harder now. He had guts, I'd give him that.

I started to smile and then chuckle at his threat.

'Wow, damn Rick. Okay' I said as I got up and went round to Carl.

I plucked off his hat and swung Lucille into the air, saying 'you said I could do it!'.

Suddenly, a tiger jumped out and wrestled one of my men to the ground, killing him.

A fucking tiger!

I flung myself backwards and retreated away from it. Gunfire now ensuing.

Simon and Dwight followed me as people from the Kingdom came in on horses, including the Widow.

'End these Saviours and there accomplices! Alexandria will not fall, not on this day!' The one with the dreds shouted.

Fuck, we we're outnumbered!

We moved round to behind a car, 'they've got a goddamn tiger!' I shouted as I pelted them with bullets.

'You taste that Simon? That is the taste of shit' I said as I ran out of ammo and ran round to another car.

We needed to retreat.

The trash guys set off smoke bombs so we could escape. We climbed into the truck and drove out of the gate as I flipped Rick off in the mirror.

Once we got back, everyone was on high alert.

'You say the word and we're ready to go' Dwight said nervously, I just looked out of the window onto the courtyard.

Looking at the spots where Molly used to stand. My eyes started to well up thinking about her.

'That's good' I replied.

Eugene was still standing behind me. I spun around and pointed Lucille at him.

'How the hell do you think she wound up dead in that box?' I said angrily.

'My, um best possible posit fingers the tarp. That sealed up said box good and tight. She ran out of air' he said with sadness in his voice.

I was sceptical. I walked towards him, my eyes still glistening.

'Maybe' I said looking over him.

I sighed and turned around to walk out onto the balcony.

'So...we are going to war!' I shouted to my people who were cheering below me.