#unassertive protagonist

[picaroroboto]

oh right I did say I was going to post about Dante Limbus Company earlier. I guess I should do that now. Not that being obligated to do so is a burden for me there is a lot worth thinking and talking about with that clockhead.

With my fixation on Silent Protagonist Player Characters of the sort from RPGs and gachas, I've been meaning for a while to dissect what I feel is one of the major common themes for a lot of these sort of characters - a sense of "emptiness". With a variety of tropes like little to no facial expressions or dialogue options, androgyny, amnesia, no canon name or backstory, etc, space for the player to imagine or project themselves is created.

But while Dante has a lot of these tropes going on - amnesia, nonbinary, faceless and mostly voiceless due to the way the clock works, they are not a player-insert/self-insert character. They are a player vessel since they are the viewpoint character: the metaphorical camera is placed behind their (metaphorical) eyes. Unlike many other examples of player characters, particularly in gachas, they have a distinct internal monologue with their own defined thoughts and feelings. They have their own personality, it's just that said personality is unassertive and lacking confidence, which is in no small part due to the confusing and powerless situation they're trapped in.

The times we do see shades of a deeper personality are interesting though: we can tell they have some sense of justice and compassion even as they understand more and more that such things are almost impossible in the City, they sympathize with and want to connect with their Sinners even with all the pain and difficulties they put them through. They have no head, no memory, no voice, almost nothing at all except a sort of determination to get those things back and to understand what's going on around them.

This turned into a bit of a ramble since I didn't really have a specific direction to this post other than recognizing that while they have a lot of similar tropes Dante isn't a pure player-insert. I'm a little behind in story - just finished Canto IV - but I'm certain that as the story goes on we'll understand a lot more of what goes on behind that clock (literally and metaphorically), and I'll be enjoying every second of it.

[proficient-in-hoarding-deadlines]

The problem of boobs

So I'm translating a part of the novel The Holy Man of Mt. Koya (高野聖) by Izumi Kyoka for my final paper this year. And the thing about Kyoka is, he chooses his words in ways so eccentric it makes your head spin.

One thing that had me thinking recently is his usage of the kanji 乳 when speaking about a man's chest. There are 2 instances of that in the opening chapters of the novel: In Chapter 7, the narrator says (about himself), "うむとこの乳の下へ念仏を唱え込んで [...]". In the english translation Charles Inouye renders this as, "and, with the nenbutsu on my lips, [...]". More literally it means something like, "and, humming the nenbutsu towards my chest [i.e. under my breath, presumably]". In chapter 8, the narrator says (again describing his own experience), "乳の下へ潜んで帯の間にも一疋", which Inouye translates as, "another [leech] had worked its way into my kimono and was hiding on my chest".

There is no denying that normally 乳 is the word for 'breasts' and is used specifically in relation to women. Kyoka himself uses it in that meaning in later chaplers.

I'm nothing even close to a native speaker, but i have formed the impression that in modern japanese the basic option in both cases above would be 胸, 'chest' (also, figuratively speaking, 'heart'). If there's a specific word for male boobies, i'm not aware of it. So, why 乳?

The first thing that occurs is that for some reason Kyoka wanted to avoid the word with a hint of a double meaning (胸), but this idea doesn't hold up as Kyoka thrives on layered meanings and making the reader guess. And 乳 doesn't mean precisely the same.

Having read even a few chapters of Kyoka's work, it's easy to see his peference for unconventional spellings. For instance, he always writes the word for a person's head as 天窓 (あたま) instead of standard 頭 (this seems to be consistent across different works). Note the reading written beside in kana: it needs to be specified bacause the word 天窓 normally has a different reading. My favourite case of this kanji/reading disparity is this: 停車場 (ステイション). Here Kyoka basically writes the (probably rather recently coined) kanji compound for 'train station' and then breaks out katakana to explain it with a loanword of the same meaning. Maybe, the reason behind 乳 is simply that Kyoka felt fond of it in some way. The only trouble I find with this explanation is the lack of an explanatory reading above.

Speaking of readings, in this article Izumi Kyoka and Language Inouye quotes recollections of some Kyoka's relative, describing his "eccentric regard for certain sounds". For instance, he avoided the syllable ge, as to him in sounded "vulgar" and was in turnd comforted by the syllable na. This might be a bit far-fetched, but perhaps something in the reading of 胸 was unpleasant to Kyoka and he had to create a work-around.

Finally - and this IS too far-fetched, but I'm just making things up off the top of my head here so bear with me - the use of 乳 for a man sort of fits with the themes. The main character/narrator of the story is a monk. His narrative foil is a brash, almost toxically masculine tradesman. This conforms to Kyoka's favorite archetype (as described in his only english-language biography "The Similitude of Blossoms", again, by Charles Inouye): his sympaties lie with the unassertive, emphatic young man. In this light the lexical grafting of a female form onto the protagonist may be read as an attempt to further soften his image by way of feminizing it. Certainly, the opposite transformation - that of the violent masculine body into (literally) bestial - is a crucial part of the story. Of course, neither does this supposed feminine transformation of the hero appear in the right place in the plot to make any such impact, nor is Kyoka's feminine unequivocally good and gentle. This idea requires further thought to fit into the world of the story properly.

Meanwhile, instead of thinking I'd like to suggest my personal favourite reading: literal. The narrator has boobs. He's trans. There, I won diversity for you. (Alternatively, call this the Eowyn Solution. Oh, the character escaped the witch who turns all men into animals? well that's cause they are no man.........)

____________________________________________

Read The Holy Man of Mt. Koya in "Japanese Gothic Tales", trans. by Charles Shiro Inouye, 1996

Also, in addition to previously mentioned pieces by Inouye, you can check out Metamorphosis: Fantasy and Animism in Izumi Kyoka by Cody Poulton - a (repulsively Freudist) article about transformations in Kyoka's prose

[rin7713]

Excerpt: Aurora Rose Project

He was standing in the door with a grim expression. A miasma of despair loomed over him, threatening to overthrow the aura of the room. “Nyrce,” he breathed hoarsely, “where is the boy?”

Nyrce became panicked instead of somber. Alarms pounded in her skull. How could she answer his question without incriminating herself? The fear of punishment overtook her sorrow. Braddock’s mere presence in her room usually stirred unrest but the aura he brought with him, in this moment, brought forth new depths of anxiety Nyrce did not realize she could succumb to. “You left him behind in your retreat, my lord… he slipped from my arms as we… as we…” the sorrow came back to the surface as Nyrce made an attempt to choke on her tears, “my boy, the one thing about this place that made me want to live…” her words slipped away with her memories of the battle field but returned as her fiery, tear soaked eyes looked up to pierce Braddock “IT WAS PRIDEFUL OF YOU TO PARADE US THERE AND BELIEVE WE WERE SAFE AS WE WATCHED YOUR HORRORS IN THE DISTANCE!!!”

Braddock did not flinch at her verbal jabs. Whether he was caught up in his own feelings or simply uncaring was not clear to Nyrce in her hysterical state. “He was my last heir, after exhiling the son you and I agreeed had no place here. He’s likely unharmed, after all it’s only my people that would callously make casualties of children. The only thing you have to mourn is that he is no longer of use to me.”

Nyrce was caught off guard with his matter of fact demeanor. “What is that supposed to mean.”

The room grew chill as Braddock took breaths to prepare his next statement. Nryce shook, feeling the fires of embarrassment and chill of fear surround her. “I think you know how you can still be of use to my legacy. Ever since my worthless son brought you to me I’ve felt drawn to your very being: your eyes still so innocent, despite what my son took from you, your scent so alluring like the fields of flowers you used to carelessly walk through, your voice so soft, knowing that you’re safer if you do not speak loudly for yourself. Surely Thanatos wishes to end my second term of bachelor hood and take on a goddess of my own.”

Her body gently shook as the anxiety boiled to the top. Tears began to slip steadily from her eyes. She wanted to run but knew she was cornered. She wanted to scream but had no will left to make her mouth move beyond a tremble. Nyrce’s flurry of emotions began to make her body numb. She looked to the incarnate of all evil in the world and saw his square jawline, his icy hazel eyes, his grey mane full of hair and his broad shoulders and considered the life she would lead with him, once her surrender was complete.

Braddock began to shift from his place in the doorway. Beyond him, Nyrce could see through the long wall of glass, that separated her apartments from the city of towers surrounding the General’s fortress. If she could break the glass with her body. Perhaps then instead of being his wife she could be a corpse, at last free of that demon’s foul gaze.

Before she could will her body to move, a sudden warmth wrapped around her wrist. It tugged her hand up from the bed and to a midpoint between General Braddock’s lips and Nryce’s lap. She gasped quietly and looked to Braddock helplessly. Warm tears slowed their flow. “Despite what evils you know I am capable of,” he began calmly, “I am not one to physically force myself upon those I desire. I want you to be a willing participant, I want you to accept me, not fear me, I want you to know I won’t harm you just because I can and I want you to appreciate how wanting you doesn’t turn me into a monster.”

Was she even capable of breathing? What was happening? The fires and chills grew more intense. Nyrce could not feel her chest moving but she could feel her face growing hot. It was hard to process losing her son, realizing the Braddock’s true intentions and contemplating suicidal escape all at once. The natural response was to tremble, numb and silent as her head felt ready to explode.

“I’ll give you some time to rest, it’s been such a long day of losses, for us both,” Braddock perched the hand he had captive back on the bed “just as a precaution you will stay in this room while I lounge in your apartments, wouldn’t want you to do anything drastic while you think things over.” Somehow he was back in the doorway, without having made a sound. Nyrce looked from him to her knees. Her body tightened as it shook. Braddock shut the door slowly and after awhile, there was the click of lock gears turning on the other side of the door.

[hpowellsmith]

ooo ok Peridot but for the Royal Affairs ROs?

Peridot: What is your protagonist’s greatest strength / weakness

Asher: [strengths: principles, loyalty] [weaknesses: unassertiveness, overcautiousness]

Beaumont: [strengths: ambition, resilience] [weaknesses: insensitivity, emotional unavailability]

Dominique: [strengths: generosity, enthusiasm] [weaknesses: complacence, people-pleasing]

Hyacinthe: [strengths: drive, charm] [weaknesses: diffidence, perfectionism]

Javi: [strengths: creativity, outward self-confidence] [weaknesses: resentment, insecurity]

Trevelyan: [strengths: courage, directness] [weaknesses: opinionated, reckless]

question list

[arcstral]

PERSONALITY TYPE, muse versus you.

               marth personality   —   ENFJ-T,  turbulent protagonist

extraverted  –  63% intuitive  –  52% feeling  –  73% judging  –  68% turbulent  –  53%

‘ Broader emotions guide both Assertive and Turbulent Protagonists when they make decisions, but that doesn’t necessarily tell us how these personalities handle transient emotional states. Both types of Protagonists tend to adopt the problems of others as their own. Being prone to experiencing their emotions more often might increase this tendency in Turbulent Protagonists. Sharing others’ emotions can increase Turbulent Protagonists’ level of compassion. But, if taken too far, it can also weigh them down. ‘

               soji personality   —   ISFP-A,  assertive adventurer

introverted  –  72% intuitive  –  52% feeling  –  59% prospecting  –  53% assertive  –  58%

‘Nearly two-thirds of Assertive Adventurers believe they handle stress well. In all their self-assurance, they may see such pressure as something that doesn’t impact their lives much because they feel that they can handle it. They may even shrug such challenges off. This disregard for stressful things allows these personalities to move forward worry-free and probably more boldly. But they may also overly minimize the significance of their stressors. Assertive Adventurers may not always attend to the problems they should.‘

What are some differences between you and your muse?

Marth is a bigger idealist and his vision for the future goes further than mine. He wants to make peace happen so he obviously acts with foresight and the intention to make waves, i.e, for a better tomorrow. My ambition to get by in life on a marketable college degree is pretty shortsighted by comparison.

I don’t tend to lose sleep over my failures. Loss and failure on the other hand affect Marth much more personally. He never forgets and always holds himself accountable even for outcomes he doesn’t bear total responsibility for.

I’m a quasi introvert whereas Marth isn’t. He’s always at the forefront of things, making proactive moves to help others, and so on. In group settings this translates to me being an active participant and speaker, but not necessarily the leader type. Marth, however, is definitely a natural born leader.

Definitely would say that Marth is more self-aware and conscious of his limits. He understands what he can and can’t do on his own, as well as more receptive to feedback and taking breaks to pace himself. If I find something worth my time or attention, I’ll be absorbed in it and forget about taking care of my health. In that sort of way, he’s a more responsible adult.

I am more owning of my achievements than Marth is and have never once felt unassertive about the talents I hold. He accredits all his accomplishments and feelings of pride to his friends. More confidence on my end, more humility on his.

What are some similarities you share with your muse?

Marth and I are proponents of moving forward. We put the past behind us no matter how sad or bitter and we’re fairly optimistic about what lies ahead for us. In the realm of relationships, it also means we don’t hold grudges too strongly against people that have wronged us or they eventually do fade away even if they existed at first.

We value family the same way and make it one of our primary goals in life to see our loved ones happy and fulfilled as well as safely accounted for. For Marth this is his sister and for me it’s my parents.

Our approach to conflict, research, and mediation is the same. We both like to reach out to as many sides as possible for a clearer picture and don’t like sticking to a one-sided or personally motivated narrative.

Our poker faces. We're both relatively calm in the face of pressure and that makes us good public speakers and presenters no matter how we might feel inside.

To both of us, our friends matter deeply but so does fairness. Even if we struggle to detach ourselves from our deepest relationships at first, and even if cutting away certain bonds will hurt, in the end we’ll do the right thing.

[xoruffitup]

Sexuality In Neon Genesis Evangelion: Adolescence & Violence

(I’m literally 20 years late to the party here, but if anyone still cares for NGE metas, this hasn’t left me alone...!)

It takes only a few episodes into NGE to sense there’s some form of unrest beneath its surface. A palpable sense of unease and malcontent shadows the characters, seeping into the bleak cityscapes and following Shinji’s listless drift from one battle to the next - creating the unrelenting sense that this show has no intention to coddle or comfort you. Much will not be explained, or even directly addressed. Most of that unease you’re feeling as a viewer will be left for you yourself to decipher – probably in a manner uncomfortably and bracingly personal. I would call this a mark of artistry, in that the viewing experience becomes something deeply intimate and unique from person to person.

The obvious narrative explanation for all this dark ambiguity is the evocation of Shinji’s troubled psychological state. He mopes in his dark bedroom, rides the train alone with his headphones in and no destination, and accepts the role of Eva pilot only when his refusal would make him feel yet more despised. He is utterly directionless and thus helpless – caught in a paralysis between his pathological need for external affirmation and his crippling fear of being hurt. He craves kindness and care from others, but is both unwilling and unable to forge such positive connections with others because he presupposes doing so will cause pain. Therefore, he makes few self-motivated choices and rebukes all notion of the driven, intentional protagonist. 

Shinji’s rejection of the traditional mantle of the hero’s journey, and his repeated regression into unassertive self-hatred also signals an unorthodox approach to storytelling - where the narrative flows around the inhibited, apathetic characters rather than through them. We as the viewers do not become invested in the narrative progression as an extension of Shinji’s own investment. Rather, a central part of the narrative becomes the self-aware exploration of its own impact upon Shinji and the wider cast of characters. Shinji, Rei, Asuka, and to a certain degree Misato and Ritsuko, do not determine the narrative direction through their own choices and thereby set events in motion; they are instead passive, reactionary presences drawn along by the provocations of seemingly inevitable series of events. (Angels attack – characters respond; Gendo or Seele give some unexplained order – characters react; Instrumentality begins – Shinji reacts)

As the curtain is finally drawn back from the human instrumentality project in the show’s final act, we realize Shinji was not simply whiny or poorly-written: His constant struggle between the fear of pain and need for intimacy is in fact the defining tension of the show as a whole. The “Hedgehog’s Dilemma.” This dilemma saturates each character’s personal trauma, fears, and desires, and finally elevates the characters’ internal reckoning in the face of instrumentality to create the show’s climax.

The show’s indirect yet masterful depiction of Shinji’s depression and undefined malaise is, in fact, keenly intentional and central to the story’s purpose. In a show defined by endlessly rich even if agonizing ambiguities and a narrative style that reveals itself only in subtlety, no minor detail is inconsequential. And so, I repeatedly found myself trying to discern the purpose of a recurring element that could be neither accidental nor innocuous. I am referring now to the show’s consistent and blatant preoccupation with the sexualization of its (female) characters and the infusion of sexuality into inter-character relationships. 

The sexualizing and/or objectifying gaze is applied far too often to be anything but an intentional layer generating narrative meaning. In a show that elegantly weaves together psychological, religious, ethical, and technological allusions to construct a cutting inspection of the human psyche, this preoccupation is not a mere trope or “fanservice.” The recurrent reference to characters’ sexuality and their depiction as sexual objects cannot be a neutral or peripheral element of narrative meaning. Beyond the impossibility of this element being unintentional or divorced from the show’s narrative purpose, we are also obliged to make ourselves aware of the gendered lens through which this depiction of sexuality is filtered, and the power balance or imbalance this depiction enforces upon the characters involved. Consistent nudity to the point of fetishism and sexual inferences to the point of defining character cease to be superficial and become something pernicious.

Below, I will explore two different frameworks through which to interpret the show’s sexual overtones. The first framework – adolescence and the fear of adulthood – aligns with my initial response to the anime, while the second framework – sexual violence –reflects my more troubled response to the End of Evangelion film. 

Framework 1: Shinji’s Adolescent Fears of Adulthood and Intimacy

Lest we forget, Shinji is only the tender age of 14. His internal struggle with self-worth and identity is exacerbated by its intersection with puberty and Shinji’s fraught understanding of his own budding sexuality. Shinji’s characterization of being highly dependent on the guidance and praise of his elders highlights both his adolescence and his own inability to confront his growth to adulthood. His unwillingness to navigate the perils of adulthood (as well as its corresponding sexual relationships) is probably evoked most clearly in his Episode 18 conversation with Kaji. After Kaji opines on men and women’s inability to understand each other – let alone themselves – Shinji merely replies dismissively, “I don’t understand adults at all.”

Given his 14-year-old perception of adulthood as something impenetrably mystical, it follows that his own budding sexuality acts as both a source of anxiety and a central aspect of his journey through adolescence. The often discussed parallels between Shinji’s relationship with Asuka and Misato’s relationship with Kaji further cements sex as something firmly belonging to adulthood; just as Asuka’s eagerness to present herself as sexually mature reflects her desire to appear independent and “grown.”

Coming to terms with one’s sexuality is of course a commonplace metaphor for the development from adolescence to adulthood. However, the characters’ understanding and comfort with their own sexualities also plays a key role in their internal reckonings and decisions which occur within instrumentality. 

During his moments of metaphysical introspection, Shinji’s confrontation with his deepest fears repeatedly presents itself in the form of sexual temptation. We see him translate this need for external validation into unconscious sexualization and desire for the women around him.  While fused with Unit 1 in Episode 20, Shinji is questioned by imagined specters of Misato, Rei, and Asuka. He reaches his breaking point when, after admitting he only pilots the Eva in hope of earning others’ praise, he cries out for someone to take care of him. After pleading, “someone be kind to me,” all three women appear to him naked, asking repeatedly, “Don’t you want to become one with me? In body and in soul?” In this imagined ordeal of self-examination, Shinji’s deepest, most fundamental need for approval and warmth from others is coded into the prospect of understanding and intimacy associated with sex. At a subconscious level, he perceives the offering of sexual union as the highest form of acceptance. Shinji therefore feels varying degrees of conflicted, guilt-ridden desire for the women around him, in the most primal form of his craving for acceptance. 

In this scene, the offering of sexual intercourse is also a direct foreshadowing to the prospect of union with all during instrumentality, and either the acceptance or rejection of that union. In End of Evangelion, Shinji’s crucial choice during instrumentality is again presented in the same terms: Asuka, Rei, and Misato’s voices all asking “Do you want to become one with me, body and soul?” Shinji’s mix of attraction and repellence (for he fears intimacy as intensely as he craves it) when confronting this question indirectly depicts his struggle to decide between a solitary but self-defined existence, and the sacrifice of his autonomous self to total union. Thus, Shinji’s repressed desire for sexual intimacy becomes in and of itself a key facet of both his decision to ultimately reject instrumentality, and his conclusive creation of an independent and capable identity.

In line with my earlier reference to Asuka’s desire to appear sexually mature, the anime consistently uses sexuality as a means of revealing character - often probing at characters’ deepest vulnerabilities. Misato is likely the most direct example. It is through her sexual relationship with Kaji that she confronts her conflicted feelings towards her father and their profound impact on her. During instrumentality, she also admits she enjoys sex as an escape mechanism from pain and a way to prove she’s alive. She seems to perceive sex in the opposite perspective from Shinji – who on some level finds it threatening. This could be attributed firstly to Misato’s maturity in age and correlating comfort with her own sexuality. Secondly, this speaks to the show’s use of sexuality to build character in ways beyond Shinji’s troubled adolescent shame. The show’s focus on its characters’ sexuality can therefore be viewed as a means of prying into the inner conflicts they each seek to hide from the world. Note it is also through the reveal of Ritsuko’s sexual involvement with Gendo that we understand the reasons for her troubled relationship with her mother, her dedication to NERV, and her knowledge of its secrets.

Though sexuality is used as a sometimes literal, sometimes symbolic, but often effective vehicle to portray abstract concepts and internal, non-physical conflicts, this does not fully explain or justify the show’s gratuitous use of the male gaze. Though the depiction of sexuality often serves the purpose of character development, this depiction is exceedingly gendered. Though Shinji is shown naked, his nudity serves comedic effect (when he runs out from the bathroom in Misato’s apartment in Episode 2) or appears highly stylized (embracing Rei’s equally naked form in End of Evangelion). By contrast, Rei and Asuka’s bodies practically serve as set pieces. The pilot suits and contrived “camera” angles incessantly present their bodies as aesthetic objects for consumption. 

Furthermore, early appearances by both female characters immediately define them as objects of sexual focus. The first time she appears, Asuka tells off Toji for looking up her skirt; Shinji ends up sprawled on top of Rei when she’s naked while first trying to get to know her in Episode 5. If we apply the interpretive framework of sexuality as a means of navigating adolescence, then it is exclusively Shinji’s journey towards adulthood with which the show shares its perspective and identification. It would therefore follow that Rei and Asuka serve merely as signposts or attractive obstacles along the path of Shinji’s development. Their bodies are exploited as tools through which to challenge and probe at Shinji’s psyche. While Shinji’s sexuality bestows him personhood and agency, Asuka and Rei’s often seem to do the opposite – instead reducing them to only the means towards Shinji’s end. Yet, even the justification that Rei and Asuka’s objectification may serve Shinji’s character development falls short, given that the girls are still depicted in a lewd and hyper-sexualized lens even when there’s nobody but us, the viewers, around to witness. 

Using sexuality as a key vehicle to convey the male protagonist’s psychology creates an inherently gendered narrative – one in which a male protagonist acts out his conflict upon female bodies. This uneven and highly exploitative depiction warps what might have been an adolescent journey of self-discovery and growth into something far less constructive and much more unsettling.

Framework 2: Pervasive References to Sexual Violence

As I argued previously, Shinji’s repressed and conflicted sexuality can be viewed as a mirror of his character-defining struggle between the desire for love and the fear of pain. In this case, Shinji’s exploration and acceptance of his own sexuality becomes in and of itself a central element of his character development and, by extension, the show’s narrative resolution as a whole, given that the outcome of instrumentality rests on Shinji’s shoulders alone. It then becomes crucial that Shinji actualize his latent desire for sexual intimacy and ultimately master his own sexuality – as the chief expression of his internal development towards accepting his relationships with others and the co-dependent process of creating his own identity, self-worth, and reality.

In the abstract, this idea seems relatively healthy. However, the “Don’t you want to become one with me?” scenes and essentially all of End of Evangelion left me with a distinctly uncomfortable impression that couldn’t have been more different from that of a guileless adolescent navigating puberty. Seeing the “Don’t you want to become one with me?” question repeated to Shinji in the End of Evangelion context made me circle around one key question: Why is this imagined physical offering by the women in Shinji’s life presented as temptation? Why does the timing of this sequence reappear while Shinji is experiencing instrumentality? Or rather, why is the experience of instrumentality itself presented with the air of sexual temptation or seduction? This all culminates into the depiction of sexual desire for the female body as something needing to be tamed or conquered – given that it is only through Shinji’s repudiation of these offerings that he ultimately also rejects instrumentality. This supposition implies an adversarial relationship between Shinji and the object(s) of his sexual desire. This implicit hostility paints sexuality now as a struggle for control and/or dominance, rather than a source of self-discovery and growth. 

I’ll note now that most of the observations and criticisms explored in this section speak almost exclusively to End of Evangelion. In my view, this implied hostility embedded into the exploration of sexuality is much more present in the film, whereas the show largely maintains sexuality as a means of fumbling adolescent growth and complex characterization. To frame what might be seen as an extreme interpretation, I’ll begin my closer reading of End of Evangelion with this Catharine MacKinnon quote:

“Once the veil is lifted, once relations between the sexes are seen as power relations, it becomes impossible to see as simply unintented, well-intentioned, or innocent the actions through which women are told every day what is expected and when they have crossed some line.”

The crucial dynamic supporting this darker interpretive framework – a dynamic much more palpable in End of Evangelion – is power relations. Referring back to my previous point wherein the persistent objectification of Asuka and Rei undermines their personhood to the same degree that it enhances Shinji’s – End of Evangelion takes this imbalance still further. Rei and Asuka’s sexualization not only serves Shinji’s development, but becomes the main stage upon which Shinji’s fight for self-determination plays out. This is to say that Shinji’s actions and key elements of the film’s narrative as a whole are acted out upon women’s bodies as both battleground and symbol. End of Evangelion resorts to a mode of storytelling that is explicitly gendered, portraying its conflict through a starkly male lens. Through the film’s imagery, brutality, and indulgence in the explicit, Shinji’s narrative is acted out through the depiction of women’s bodies as objects either with destructive power or being destroyed themselves; and as threats which much be conquered.

The Shinji we see in End of Evangelion experiences highs and lows far more extreme than his anime counterpart. EoE Shinji is shockingly depraved, powerless, and violent – in that order. His experiences in relation to the navigation of his sexuality take on a tone of violence and aggression. If he cannot act out his sexual impulses – if he cannot subdue the tormenting yet desired female body to the point that satisfies his desires (even if not always sexual in nature) – he resorts to violence to assert his will. During the kitchen scene within instrumentality, it is at the point when Asuka coldly rebuffs his pleading for her help that he first strangles her. Thinking back to the above quote re power relations – is this the “line” beyond accepted behavior where Asuka becomes deserving of male violence?

Violence takes many forms – all of them an embodiment of power relations. Yes, Shinji masturbating over Asuka’s stripped, unconscious form in the first scene is unequivocally an act of violence. No matter how “fucked up” and past sense Shinji may have been in that moment, he is still a man demeaning a woman and taking pleasure from the act – her inability to consent and even her comatose state all fueling male sexual gratification. Aside from the considerable shock value, this scene sets the tone of Shinji’s actions towards women throughout the film as relations of power and dominance. This scene further establishes repressed sexual desire and thwarted sexual frustration as the latent foundation of Shinji’s interactions with Asuka throughout the film; thus creating motivation and tension with the potential to drive him to further forms of violence. 

In EoE, Shinji shares some type of sexual experience with all three women to whom he’s closest. First, his repulsive descent into depravity at the film’s very start. In this moment when he’s at his lowest, it is his most base and yet powerful instinct that takes over. He exacts pleasure, comfort, and distraction from Asuka’s body despite its fleetingness and her lack of consent. Second, Misato realizes that physical intimacy is the only thing that will get through to Shinji in his shell-shocked state. With a heated kiss, she delivers on the show’s hints of sexual interest between the two. Demonstrating just how well she understands Shinji, she promises him “We’ll do the rest when you get back,” knowing the promise of this ultimate physical act of approval and care is likely the only thing he will fight for. To put this in blunt terms: Shinji is promised sexual access to a woman whose praise he values, and this prospect of sexual fulfillment is what motivates him to finally enter Unit 1. While he isn’t imposing dominance over Misato here the same way he did to Asuka, this keeps with the film’s overall gendered perspective wherein Shinji’s triumphs or rare moments of purpose are marked by his access to women’s bodies. 

Third, Shinji’s interactions with Rei/Rei-Lilith within instrumentality. It first must be noted that Rei is depicted naked for practically the whole movie. Sure, this might be necessary for the initiation of instrumentality, but it also serves to complete her objectification. I can by no means see it as mere coincidence that the advent of instrumentality and potential unleashing of the cataclysmic Third Impact is all represented by a giant, naked female form. What would be the greatest threat from the perspective of the male-gendered narrative? Precisely this – a female body that is overpowering, unconquerable, and unfathomable. By extension, I also don’t believe it’s coincidental that Shinji’s attainment of self-determination in his decision to reject instrumentality happens concurrently to his sexual union with Rei. She explains to him that no, he hasn’t died, “everything has just been joined into one.” This “joining” is depicted utterly literally, without any of the subtlety by which the anime presented sexuality as representative of total union within instrumentality. Thus, the resolution of Shinji’s character arc and the film’s climax as a whole occurs when Shinji finally attains fulfillment of the sexual desire he has harbored since the film’s beginning. The following shot of him and Rei naked with his head in her lap resolves the crisis of instrumentality with an unmistakable post-coital essence. 

After these three encounters, we have the much-debated final scene of Shinji reuniting with Asuka after emerging from instrumentality. By this point, Shinji has taken advantage of her comatose body and strangled her, but she still has not shown herself amenable to his sexual desires as Misato and Rei have. She remains beyond his ability to either control or dominate. And so, while Rei’s giant, naked, and broken (read: conquered) body rests in pieces behind them, Shinji asserts his newfound will to attack the woman who has resisted his desire and refused the gratification he sought – both physically and emotionally. 

This scene left me possibly even more disturbed than the film’s opening. To me, this ending implies that along with Shinji’s discovery of self-determination comes the male’s unfettered triumph following a struggle defined by sexual violence. In this final scene, we see the resistant woman subject to yet more violence at the hands of the protagonist – until at last, she no longer resists. In my view, this final scene was the occasion of Asuka’s capitulation. She is finally subdued to the point of acceptance and affectionate response even when being subjected to violence. She responds to Shinji’s aggression not with retaliation, but with a loving gesture. Her final words of “how disgusting” reminded me immediately of the hospital scene, and what Shinji had asked of her there: “Wake up, help me, call me an idiot like always.” Now, the man’s desire is at last satiated.

Beyond the narrative reliance on sexuality as a form of power relations, EoE also engages in gratuitous degradation of female bodies. They are either imbued with threatening, destructive power (Rei-Lilith), or experience destruction themselves (Asuka in Unit 2 and Rei-Lilith at the film’s end). Both Rei and Asuka’s bodies are subjected to extreme violence throughout the film, even while still being depicted as sexual objects. While suffering horrific, graphic injuries during her fight in Unit 2, Asuka is depicted writhing in agony in the entry plug with a disturbing sense of the erotic. After her body becomes the apocalyptic vehicle of instrumentality, Rei’s giant naked form is depicted crumbling to earth, stripped not only of her clothes but any sense of the human. Her split-open head rests beside the sea of LCL – a symbol of the male protagonist’s moral and psychological “victory.”

Framework 2: Counter-Arguments

Though I was disturbed by the rampant and dehumanizing sexualization in EoE, there were also plenty elements of the film I admired and remain deeply fascinated by. I don’t wish to seem overly disparaging, so I’ll briefly mention two counter-examples to this more critical framework.

1. Rei denying and rebuking Gendo and asserting her own will, while depicted as naked. It’s hard to overstate the enormity of Rei’s decision here. After existing as a seemingly unfeeling clone created for the purpose of realizing Gendo’s desires, Rei brings his plans to a crashing halt right at the pinnacle moment. The scene metaphorically traveled from 0-100 very quickly. It began with the insinuation of Gendo joining with Rei in a vaguely sexual sense, and his hand sinking into her breast in an unconventional bodily invasion while she showed discomfort. But then she asserts, “I am not your doll.” Her nakedness seems transformed from vulnerability to power. She is no longer the passive instrument of a man’s realization of his desires. Instead, she asserts her personhood and makes the individual decision how to employ the power within her. In so doing, she decides not only her own fate, but practically that of the whole world. 

2. Shinji and Kaworu’s dynamic could be seen as refuting a binary reading of gendered power relations. Taking Shinji for bisexual has the potential to revise my interpretation from ‘Shinji subconsciously desires sexual access and control over women’ to ‘Shinji subconsciously desires sex and control’ period, without the emphasis on women as the subjects of his struggle. If this gendered binary is removed, then his growth and self-actualization need not come at the expense of the female characters around him. Extending Shinji’s repressed sexuality to encompass desire for Kaworu also alleviates the connotations of dominance and confrontation embedded within heterosexual sexuality. 

Writing all this out was largely my personal means of resolving the million jumbled thoughts in my head after finally diving into this stunning masterpiece of a show. I’ll say again - what makes this show such a timeless work of brilliance is its highly personal resonance in the minds of its viewers. In the end, it isn’t a story about robots, aliens, or even sex at all – it’s a self-reflective act forcing you to wake up and confront your own role in creating the very reality in which you live. What kind of world have you made for yourself? Have you trapped yourself in confinement of your own making, or have you imagined every possible version of your world and liberated all the possibilities hidden in your creation of self? Evangelion can mean something different to every one, and no single interpretation is more correct than any others. So that said – a hearty thank you to anyone who actually read all the way here, and I’m always eager for discussion! :)

[laimdalen-itellam]

Getting to Know the Inquisitor

Basics

Name: Ma'aravel Lavellan

Age at the start of their game: 24 (Born 12 Bloomingtide, 9:17 Dragon)

Gender: Male

Sexual orientation: Bisexual

Race: Elf

Class: Warrior (temporarily); Rogue

Height: 5'3"

Weight: 118 lbs

Eyes: Hazel

Hair color/texture: Auburn; Straight

Skin tone: Peaches and Cream

Do they tan or freckle?: Tanning? Not so much. But he does have plenty of freckles, mostly bunched up on his cheeks and the bridge of his nose

Any distinctive physical characteristics?: He has a full face of olive green Mythal vallaslin

Personality

Personality type: INFP-T

Optimist, pessimist, or realist?: Probably an optimist, but clueless and naive might be better words for it

Best traits:

Kind

Open-Minded

Pure-Hearted

Loyal

Attentive

Worst flaws:

Impressionable

Naive

Unassertive

Soft-Hearted

Insecure

Tropes that apply to them:

Amnesiac Hero

The Chains of Commanding

Closest Thing We Got

Dream Walker

Everyone Calls Him "Barkeep"

Expecting Someone Taller

Frontline General

Go and Sin No More

Hearing Voices

Hope Bringer

Humble Hero

I Am Who?

Manchurian Agent

Messianic Archetype

Nice Guy

Oblivious to Love

The Only One

Power Palms

Red Baron

Reluctant Warrior

Right Man In the Wrong Place

Save the Villain

Sole Survivor

Spanner in the Works

Survivor's Guilt

Touched by Vorlons

Undying Loyalty

Unique Protagonist Asset

Unluckily Lucky

Unwanted False Faith

Weirdness Magnet

Are there any songs that particularly suit them?:

"I Don't Remember" by Peter Gabriel

"Stop This Train" by John Mayer

"Being Good Isn't Good Enough" by Barbara Streisand

"Do Something Good" by Darryl Worley

"With A Little Help From My Friends" by The Beatles

If yes, would they agree with your selections?: I'm not sure he'd know how to answer that, honestly

Preferences

Favorite color: Green

Favorite animal: Halla

Taste in clothing: Whatever's comfortable. He does really like the outfits he's seen Solas and some of the Dalish elves wearing, though

How do they feel about mage rights?: Shouldn't all people at least have the right to freedom? He doesn't understand segregation or prejudice of any kind

How do they feel about the other races of Thedas?: They seem nice enough. There are some humans that don't seem to like him, and that group of Qunari did try to kill him, but he knows better than to think a few individuals are representative of their whole population

Are they religious?: In a way. He definitely was before the Conclave, but then the amnesia hit. Solas retaught him many aspects of his culture and religion (with his own opinions coloring said lessons), and he has come across countless evidence that the Dalish gods exist, so he doesn't see why he shouldn't believe in them again

If they were to find themselves in a modern AU

Favorite food: Ice Cream

Drink order: Mudslide

What would they wear for a night out?: An untucked blouse or button-up, some pants, and a pair of boots

Song(s) that would be sure to get them on the dance floor: None that I can think of

College major: Forestry or Natural Resources Conservation

Ideal date: Getting food, watching a movie, and cuddling

Favorite movie and/or film genre: Maleficent; Fantasy

Family/Friends/Love Life

Relationship with their parents: Lavellan's father was a city elf he never knew, but his mother was more than enough. She was kind and gentle and raised him lovingly until she fell deathly ill. The two of them returned to her clan, so that she knew her son would be cared for once she was gone. Sure enough, the clan kept him safe and healthy, but he was never shown even half the love he'd become accustomed to under his mother's care

Siblings (outside of canon): N/A

Best friend(s): Cole, Iron Bull, and Sera

Companion(s) they get along best with: Dorian, Solas, Varric, Cole, Iron Bull, and Sera

Companion(s) they get along worst with: Vivienne

Companion(s) from other games in the series you wish they could meet, and why: Merrill. They're both adorable sweethearts who were ostracized by their clans, so I feel like they'd get along pretty well

Age of sexual debut: Around 18 or 19

Romanced: Dorian (RPs won't go beyond an awkward date or two with anyone else, and not even that once he's started to date his vhenan)

Relationship status as of the end of Inquisition: Long-distance partners

Are there any songs that particularly suit their romance?:

"Crazy for You" by Madonna

"Teenage Dream" by Katy Perry

"Love Is Beginning" by Imaginary Future

"Your Arms Feel Like Home" by 3 Doors Down

What are they like as a romantic partner?: Eager and willing to please. Also, incredibly cuddly and doting

Do they enjoy cuddling?: As mentioned before, yes! He will take every opportunity to be as close to his vhenan as possible

Do they want children?: He hasn't really thought about it

Do they (now or eventually) have children?: Probably not

Skills

Can they cook?: If asked to. He's made some stews and roasted meats in the past

Can they sing/play an instrument?: No instruments, but he can sing slow songs pretty well. He has a hard time sticking to the beat on faster ones

Are they a good dancer? If not, do they do it anyway?: His only experience dancing was at the Winter Palace. He stumbled a bit at the foreign movements with Florianne, so Dorian let him rest his feet on his own during their later reconnaissance to avoid spoiling the mood

Do they have any creative hobbies?: No

Any martial training beyond their main weapon?: He used to use daggers or a shortbow, and eventually he went back to them, but on his first outing after the Conclave, he just picked up the nearest weapon, which happened to be a longsword he had to hold with both hands. Assuming he didn't know how to fight at all, he was taught the basics of the weapon by a few of his companions

Languages spoken: The common tongue and Elvhen

Any other unique skills they'd like us to know about?: None that he can remember

Template

[ogradyfilm]

Recently Viewed: A Whisker Away

Logged into Netflix to watch A Whisker Away, Studio Colorido’s charming followup to the equally enchanting Penguin Highway.

The plot revolves around Miyo Sasaki, a young schoolgirl that, contrary to her cheerful demeanor, feels totally alone, unloved, and invisible. Abandoned by her mother and caught in the middle of a bitter custody battle, she privately wishes that the world would just vanish and put an end to her suffering… until a mischievous spirit sells her a mask that magically transforms her into an adorable kitten. Her feline disguise allows her to get closer to Kento Hinode, the object of her unrequited crush. Although she initially revels in his displays of affection, she quickly realizes that they are no substitute for an actual relationship. Unfortunately, complications soon arise, forcing our protagonist to race against the clock in order to reclaim her humanity before she loses it permanently.

I absolutely adore this particular subgenre of Japanese fantasy—supernaturally-flavored love stories that utilize a whimsical fairytale structure to explore deeper universal truths. The central “mask” metaphor is a bit unsubtle, but is nevertheless quite effective. Even before her literal metamorphosis, Miyo hides behind a smile and an extroverted attitude, fearing that showing any sign of vulnerability would make her an easy target for bullies. Hinode, meanwhile, is rather insecure and unassertive beneath his cool and confident exterior. The conflict is propelled by these characters’ refusal to be emotionally honest with one another—and it remains consistently compelling and engaging.

If the movie has one glaring weakness, it lies in its familiarity: Hayao Miyazaki, Makoto Shinkai, and Mamoru Hosoda have been traversing this same thematic ground for decades, and A Whisker Away never strays very far from the established tropes and archetypes. Still, it manages to excel within that framework. Humorously ineffectual villains, for instance, are a dime a dozen, but it’s rare to find an example that is both genuinely funny and legitimately threatening; the corpulent, soul-stealing Mask Salesman, however, pulls off the perilous balancing act with plenty of panache.

I wouldn’t call A Whisker Away an instant classic (it certainly doesn’t rank among such animated masterpieces as Spirited Away, Voices of a Distant Star, and Wolf Children), but it is undeniably cute, cuddly, and heartwarming—and sometimes, that’s all you really need.

[ryanmeft]

Movie Review: First Cow

First Cow is a quiet movie. I’m using that word in both a literal and figurative sense. It has a minimal score and not a lot of need for extraneous chatter. Where it is quieter, though, is in it’s soul. It is set in 1820, a mere 45 years after the founding of the United States, and exists in that strange time between the Revolution and the Civil War that isn’t of much interest to most filmmakers. It has two quiet protagonists---even the man on the make, who has a scheme for every opportunity, is not loud or boisterous. It even has a quiet antagonist, a man who, when his wrath is roused, sounds more like a flustered bank clerk than an enraged baron.

It begins with a quiet shot, as a woman and her dog discover two human skeletons buried in the woods of Oregon. You’ll almost never get such a shot in a non-horror film, but you get it here, and it’s almost peaceful. A tug moves down a nearby river, the day is fair, and the remains seem as if they could have just fallen asleep and stayed there.

Kelly Reichardt does not like Big Drama. She has made a film about eco-terrorists that was so low-key, the explosion that wrapped up the plot came like a thunderclap, despite explosions being common in modern movies. Here, her heroes are Otis Figowitz (John Magaro), a shy traveling cook who dreams of opening a bakery, and King-Lu (Orion Lee), a Chinese man who seems to be constantly in trouble but never worried. Otis helps King-Lu escape his pursuers, and they meet again later, whereupon the cook is taken as his friend and essentially invited to live at his makeshift cabin. The cook is unpopular with the more rough-and-ready trappers and hunters who populate the Oregon Territory, seemingly for no other reason than his lack of hard-drinking, hard-talking ways.

Much about the two men must be inferred. King-Lu claims his murder of a Russian hunter was in retaliation for the killing of his friend on suspicion of theft, but as we will discover, the man plans petty thievery as casually as some men put on socks. He is plainly a con-man, though a decidedly working class one. His plan, which is to steal milk from the only cow in the territory so that Otis can make honey biscuits and sell them to the luxury-starved trappers, hurts only the rich landowner (Toby Jones) who has plenty. The roughnecks they sell the treats to do not feel cheated, nor are they---if you’re the only one providing something that can’t be gotten in hundreds of miles, you are on their side, however much you charge.

They are, apparently, too far out in the frontier for racism to be a huge factor, but Otis is notably referred to by his name while King-Lu is only The Chinaman. Natives weave their baskets on the river shores by the docks and mingle in the tiny settlement. In that time, and that place, there was still room. What there might not be room for is Otis. He is quiet, shy, does not relish the company of brash men, and aspires to open a bakery. He gravitates toward King-Lu’s soft-spoken authority, defers to his plans and his greater level of confidence, and has no qualms about sleeping in the same tent. Is Otis homosexual? The movie leaves that possibility open. He may just be an unassertive man in need of a more dominant, but also not unkind, figure to shepherd him. Yet if he were to prefer men as lovers, or even if his companions were to think that he might, it would certainly explain the level of burning hostility they hold for him.

I noticed as I watched that most of the shots in the film are very close. Reichardt and her regular cinematographer Christopher Blauvelt are working with only 2 million bucks, a small sum even by indie film standards. As with Night Moves and Certain Women, they not only make it work but turn it to their advantage. Westerns tend to be shot broadly, to pull the camera out and take in the unforgiving but beautiful landscapes. Reichardt and Blauvelt instead zoom in. Notice how they make a tiny trading post seem alive and bustling by only ever shooting one part of it at a time, and by leaving certain action, like a bar fight, mostly off-screen. Or how they enhance the claustrophobia of living in these wild places by never covering more than a tiny part of the woods at a time.

Reichardt and co-writer Jonathan Raymond have a script at hand that plays to the strengths of very small films, and to the strengths of their two lead actors, who deliver their writing in ways worthy of notice. Magaro and Lee act against every instinct of a person with a camera in their face. This is especially true of Lee, who is tasked with playing a schemer who does not preen, does not call attention to himself, and does not flaunt his success. Indeed, to do so as a Chinese man in these times would certainly have been more trouble than it was worth. Instead of grand adventures out of dime novels, the film presents the more common picture of the west: two people trying to take the advantages they are presented with, put together enough to get out, and cope with economic injustice in a land supposedly full of opportunities. And it is, of course, if only you’re able to take advantage of the situation, and get away with it.

Verdict: Highly Recommended

Note: I don’t use stars, but here are my possible verdicts.

Must-See

Highly Recommended

Recommended

Average

Not Recommended

Avoid like the Plague

You can follow me on Twitter here, if you want more posts about film and video games and sometimes about manscaping:

https://twitter.com/RyanmEft

All images are property of the people what own the movie.

[houseofanubis-headcanon]

An Analysis of the Joy-Fabian- Nina Love Triangle

I would like to preface this analysis with the reminder that my thoughts and feelings, although passionate, are subjective and open to change. Some of the ideas I express her might be seen as controversial. I don’t know. I’m actually very interested in discussing this plotline. Therefore, if people disagree or would like to add on - please do! I’m also writing this at 2 AM and I am wackers-bananzos.

In the beginnings of House of Anubis we are given three important pieces of information pertaining to this analysis. Those being 1) Joy and Fabian are at the very least friends, 2) Patricia and Joy are at the very least best friends, 3) Nina and Fabian are growing closer. Nina and Fabian’s friendship later causes Patricia to accuse Fabian of being to relaxed on Joy’s disappearance.

My ideas lean with support of the headcanon that Patricia, while maintaining her friendship, did throughout the events of season 1 and beginning of season 2 have a crush/romantic feelings for Joy. This is my personal preference and interpretation, but doesn’t affect the analysis that much. This crush can be hinted at by the behavior exhibited by Patricia. She is very concerned for her friend after Joy’s disappearance, which, although not inherently romantic, is more likely out of a deeper feeling. Patricia’s feelings are also expressed through her opposition to Joy attempting to attract Fabian, Patricia’s explanation also supported by her friendship with Nina. There are other more subtle hints regarding Patricia’s sexuality, but in the scheme of this analysis I will establish an unrequited crush without delving too much into the independent intricacies.

In season 2, and hinted in season 1, it is revealed that Joy has feelings for Fabian and is discouraged by his relationship with Nina. Joy throughout the entirety of season 2 makes it part of her mission of assimilating back into her old Anubis lifestyle to cause a rift between Fabian and Nina. This eventually devolves into Joy blatantly attacking Nina.

Nina also has a part to play in the stroking of Joy’s fire. Other than dating Fabian in the first place, Nina is also very jealous of anyone Fabian is remotely romantic with. This especially includes Joy. Nina tenses whenever Fabian and Joy joke, hang out, or talk, because of the threat Nina interprets Joy to pose. This threat is only heightened by Fabian’s indecisiveness and unassertive attitude that only tends to get him in trouble with Nina and Joy.

This plotline goes back and forth between Nina being too awkward to communicate with Fabian, Fabian being too flustered and confused to do anything about anything, and Joy being a little coo-coo maniac (just kidding, but you know what I mean.)

Somewhere throughout the late-middle of season 2, as Joy becomes more exposed and broken down, Patricia’s distance, originally brought on by her Sibuna obligations, only becomes more prominent. At this point, is where I assume Patricia fully moves on from her unrequited crush on Joy and the two separate. Patricia is happy with Eddie, and Joy has lost Patricia as a friend.

The season’s conclusion involves Joy aiding Sibuna in the Senet task, eventually leading to a fight between Joy and Fabian where they both shout each other’s flaws at one another. This fight is seemingly resolved by Fabian, showing his development, decides to take Joy’s potentially life or death advice, despite her warning not to follow her lead. This shows Fabian to have grown as not only a character, by making decisions that have big consequences, but as a friend of Joy, expressing his trust in her, despite her chaotic behavior. The two solve the Senet task and rescue Nina, Alfie, Patricia, and Amber from the evil Senet dungeon. Joy and Fabian become friends again. Nina and Fabian start dating again and the season concludes once again with Fabian and Nina kissing and their friends being oddly happy about it.

There is more to discuss about season 3, but I will get into that in a bit.

Now for the real shit. Also known as, how this plotline helps develop these characters.

Fabian- Personally, I feel as though Fabian’s transformation throughout this plotline was the best part about it. He certainly grew as a character. In season 1 and the beginning of season 2 Fabian struggled with being assertive, making decisions, and communicating with others. By the end he was still a confused, bumbling dork, but he was one who wasn’t afraid to trust his intuition. I feel like season 2 both had Fabian’s lowest and highest moments of trusting himself and his decisions. The lowest being both throughout this love triangle plot line and the Senet game. (Honestly, I could do a whole analysis on the Senet task. It fucking tested some limits!) The highest was also in the Senet game as Fabian showed both his fight with and trust in Joy. If this thread of assertiveness and decision making continues throughout season 3 I can’t entirely say, but it definitely seems like it isn’t a struggle anymore. Also, his attraction to Mara in “Touchstone of Ra” showed him to be able to handle relationships a lot better than previously, in terms of his instincts.

Joy - Joy’s journey throughout season 2 revolves around her recovery from her disappearance. She is having to deal with both the events of last year and readjusting to school. Joy in season 2 is in my opinion one of the most fascinating moments developmentally. Joy loses everything in this season. She realizes that returning to her school after a year of being away means that nothing is the same. This is what initially triggers Joy to desperately attempt to get Nina away and Fabian back. This was what it used to be before Joy went missing. But in this season, as Joy tries to win Fabian back amongst other things, Joy just becomes more and more distraught. She loses Fabian. She loses Patricia. She loses her reputation after many things, but especially the Jack Jackal scandal. Season 2 is the phoenix bursting into flames. It is only until Joy becomes friends with Fabian again that she realizes and accepts how things will be different, but also okay. And as much as I would like to say that season 3 is the phoenix rising from the ashes, it is not. At least, not in the beginning. I believe the way the writers handled Nina leaving was very poorly. Especially when considering how Joy reacts. In the beginning of season 3 she is immediately after Fabian again. Only when he rejects her, showing his newfound assertiveness, is she turned off and decides to remake herself (aka the phoenix rising from the ashes). Personally, I think this makeover should’ve happened at the very beginning of the season to signal Joy’s new confidence as a different person with advanced understandings. Having Joy pine after Fabian once more simplifies Joy’s motivations to be purely about her attraction to Fabian, bring that piece of her development right to the surface.

Nina- Nina, in my opinion (very much opinion), is one of my least favorite characters on the show and this is one of the reasons. In season 2, more of Nina’s flaws are revealed through her conflict with Joy. I like this aspect. I like to see protagonists as imperfect people with undesirable qualities. However the flaws that the writers gave Nina seemed… incomplete. Nina, to me, being a person who doesn’t communicate well and often blames herself for the bad things happening to other people, wouldn’t be an openly jealous person. Her conflict with Joy makes sense, but it is fueled by the wrong reasons. These flaws only become worse when Nina breaks up with Fabian, but also gets extremely possessive and jealous of him. This becomes especially apparent during the masquerade kiss fiasco. It is understandable that Nina would be upset about that. This is a boy she likes kissing a girl who she does not. I get that she would be upset. I would also get that she would cry to Amber about it. My friends have certainly done that with me. My problem is that the show frames it in a way that makes it seem that handling Nina’s feelings is now Fabian’s responsibility. He needs to save Nina both literally from falling down the chasm, and figuratively from falling into a sadness because she thinks that “Fabian likes Joy more than me!” Once again, these flaws are only made worse by the season finale. After all of this jealousy and possessiveness Nina still gets what she wants. She kisses Fabian. Yes, she did somewhat resolve her conflict with Joy by thanking her for saving her from the Senet dungeon and by accepting her into a part of Sibuna, but that still doesn’t solve this issues that she internally made acceptable. Nina is developed into a character where jealousy and possessiveness will get you what you want. I don’t know if the writers had a plan to solve this issue later, but I doubt it.

In conclusion, this plotline had very interesting aspects tied to it. Fabian developed into a stronger character because of it, Joy’s arc in season 2 was very strong, and Nina began the season with the potential for potential. However, overall this plotline fell flat.

TL;DR - The writers don’t know how to handle character arcs.

[ournewoverlords]

Booksmart slaps. It’s just a huge amount of fun to watch - the key word here for me is “good-natured”. This is a good-natured movie that teases and pokes fun at a lot of people - a lot of *kinds* of people, from the queer drama kids to the dopey jocks to the Gen Z overachieving feminist types who have pictures of Michelle Obama on their wall and can quote Susan B Anthony from memory - without ever making fun of anyone in a mean-spirited way, and highlighting that no one is ever “just” their tribe. The ending ties the story up neatly with a feel-good bow about how no one is really what they seem on the surface, especially not in high school, when everyone’s trying so hard to be invulnerable… which also means they can’t be *seen*. There’s a lot of great character work here that I think could’ve been fleshed out even more (the 1 hour 45 min runtime feels shockingly short in the day and age of Endgame) but still feels natural and sincere, and the huge array of secondary characters - real characters, not just insert-famous-cameos - gives this movie not just humor but so much life and buoyancy.

(Warning: light spoilers beneath cut)

What keeps it from reaching the top tier for me, though, is that it somehow still feels like something I’ve seen before, even though the window dressing is so different. It’s definitely rare to see female best-friendship displayed so frankly, genuinely, and *hilariously* on the big screen, and I can’t remember another movie where the nerdy valedictorian is a boss and knows it, not to mention one where one of them is a lesbian (my young baby lesbian Amy!! protect that cinnamon roll), but the story of two blood-sworn, childhood-, everything-friends reaching the last chapter of their adolescence together in fun and games and boozy celebration, all while the fear of how they’ll face the great unknown without the other is this silent undercurrent churning beneath… that feels familiar to me? That doesn’t keep me from loving this particular theme, because it IS a great one, I just mean it’s not as original as Ladybird, so it lends itself to comparison more easily. 

Superbad, for instance. I actually kinda hate how every review (including the one linked here, which is totally in line with my sentiments) keeps calling this “the female Superbad”. Yes, it’s a coming-of-age comedy about two friends at the end of the senior year trying to go out with a bang together, and yes, it’s a little raunchy, and yes, it really is all about the friendship between the two main characters at its core… but the whole texture, color, and point of Booksmart are completely different. 

By texture, I mean that even as the two girls are the “heroes” of this quest, it’s still interested in the characters outside them, such that you really get the sense that they are their own people, with their own lives and inner life. In the briefest of screentimes you grasp instantly why someone like Molly would be attracted to easygoing jock Nick (but then connects to the hopelessly-messy-but-sweet Jared), and why Amy likes the skatergirl with the big toothy grin. The other kids and love interests aren’t just vessels for Molly and Amy’s own awakenings. In fact, some of them have their own troubles, and they’re all really pretty good kids.

It’s interested in the way that the two mains are, in their own way, not the most perfect people. How the world’s really not out to get them; in fact, they’re the ones who have to learn to fit into it. I talk more about this below, but this was the part I liked the most, because it feels particularly true to life in a way that I don’t think I’ve seen in many other coming-of-age narratives, much less light-hearted comedies.

Speaking of light-hearted, the whole tone of the humor is waay different from Superbad’s too. It’s funny as hell, which is probably the most important thing at the end of the day — there were a few scenes that had me and my entire theater howling — but amazingly for a coming-of-age comedy, I remember very few of the jokes being gross-out or sexual, or even all that cringe. Booksmart mines a lot of physical humor just in their sheer facial expressions (if a picture is a thousand words, Beanie Feldstein’s face does the work of a thousand punchlines), but it’s mostly the little throw-away lines and hilarious sketches (the attempted robbery in the car! Amy’s overly-well-meaning parents! everything GiGi and Jared do) that string everything together and carry the day. That’s not to say that there aren’t serious moments that are given due weight too — Amy under the water, submerged in that song is just an absolutely beautiful shot. 

It reminds me a little of Bo Burnham’s Eighth Grade, which I think is a more interesting comparison than Superbad here. Booksmart tries to capture some of that raw realness that Eighth Grade had, underneath all the silliness and humor; it is, in many ways, about how hard it is to be vulnerable to someone else, even (especially) the people you love. It pulls at a lot of strands and among them are the idea that this is what high school is really like, that to be honest all these boys (and girls!) who hold your heart in their clumsy, sweaty fingers will be like leaves in the wind years from now, that standing on the entrance to adulthood isn’t a physical change, it’s not about booze, or losing your virginity, or getting accepted by your peers. Becoming an adult is inner work, alright, but it’s also not work you can do on your own. Because it’s about how you treat yourself, but it’s about how you treat other people too. 

But I think where Eighth Grade really succeeds is this it has this kind of specificity to it — it really, really is about this awkward girl, and her lonely existence, and about being a girl who is becoming a woman in a certain context. And that specificity gives it a kind of honesty that rings painfully true to me. Booksmart — probably because it is trying to avoid stereotypes and do something entirely new here, which is totally commendable — almost feels a little too universal. It feels like you could replace Molly and Amy here with dudes, and it wouldn’t be a huge change in dynamics outside the pussy hats and Malalia worship, because these two are defined more by their identities as “overachieving party-pooping best-friend NERDS” than by being girls per se. These are two whipsmart dorks who are best friends, and happen to be female, rather than a portrayal of female best friendship per se. And the other kids treat them that way too: no one gives a shit Molly’s chubby or Amy’s a lesbian, they give a shit that they’re exasperating know-it-alls.

Which is REALLY refreshing. I’m being unfair here — it’s *because* it’s so rare to see female friendships or just girls in general depicted this way on screen that I think it doesn’t quite “fit” my own intuitions about real life. But I’m a weird case of someone who really struggled in high school, and definitely didn’t have friends much less deep ones like theirs, and I bet other women would recognize themselves in these two and their relationship much more. The frank vagina talk and the fact that Molly and Amy are actually really self-assured and even pretty damn well-liked are just super freakin’ cool anyways. In particular I LOVE the way they’re still dorky, in a way I so rarely see female characters allowed to be because female characters written by dudes tend to be so poised and “above” the main male protagonist (probably because the screenwriters are thinking back to their own high-school crushes, who must’ve seemed so mature and unattainable to a nerdy teenage boy). 

It goes back to what I said about this being an affectionate, feel-good movie where everyone turns out to be pretty decent in the end. It doesn’t set out to be much more than that, and I’m not sure if I wanted it to be, but I think it’s that fact they didn’t go all out that keeps it from being a 10/10 for me. It’s just very sweet and knowing and funny and always making sure to laugh with these oddball kids, but that same gentleness keeps it from being something great; it’s like you need some claws to expose something “real”.

It’s a little strange to me, for example, that the movie dishes out a lot of high-school tropes — all the kids are playful representatives of some stereotype — but doesn’t seem to have any real bullies, and happily accepts the two not-very-outcasted outcasts at the party with open arms. And the girls each get their heart crushed, but only for like five minutes before they (tbqh) each get an upgrade. Every Gen Z tribe gets represented — from the failing stoner who actually has an offer from Google to the misunderstood school slut to poor Jared, my sweet beautiful mess of an unloved richboy — in this kind of Glee grab-bag kinda way, but without Glee’s sense that what ties us all together is this fucking shared suffering called high school; Booksmart’s high school is more like a utopia where everyone wears what they want and gets to be quirky and different and much cooler than you think in their own individualistic way. (They even have Jessica Williams as a teacher! UGH, so jelly.)

There’s something that’s actually really subversive about this, because 1) no one’s a villain and 2) to the extent that Molly and Amy are unpopular, it’s kinda brought on by themselves. *They* were the ones who chose never to hang out with the other kids, because studying was more important. *They* are the ones who have to learn something. Molly was the one who judged everyone by the school they got into, even as the others never gave a shit about it. Amy came out two years ago, but the reason she’s never had a kiss isn’t so much because she’s a lesbian, but because she’s too timid and unassertive as a person. Molly’s character arc is discovering that she’s too freaking judgey and she needs to stop assuming she knows everything from the cover, Amy’s is to realize herself as her own person outside of the (admittedly powerful) centrifugal force of her best friend. 

Those are GREAT ideas for arcs, it’s just that the execution of them didn’t completely land for me — maybe because the jokes were competing so much with the serious bits for screentime, it had to scramble at the end for the moment of character growth. So it didn’t feel fully “earned” to me, even as it worked on the thematic level of truly seeing people when you aren’t blinded by your own assumptions. 

Still, it’s a really satisfying movie with a different take on a common trope, and packed with killer lines and secondary characters like Jared that are just so great (he’s one that feels especially on-point to me because I recognize one of my old classmates in him — a great kid, just… swimming through life in a different lane). The cameos by the adult actors — Jessica Williams, Lisa Kudrow, Jason Sudeikis, Will Forte — were predictably fantastic. In fact all the acting and casting was SO GOOD (I found out later that the casting director was the one who did Freaks and Geeks!). I’m impressed by Olivia Wilde in her directorial debut here, it’s clear that she has an ear for comedic beats and some of the shots were wonderful — in a lot of comedies the camera is just kinda static and it’s all talking heads, but here the angles, the POV shots, the longer takes that move in and out of sound add so much dynamism. Excited for what she does next.

[asianhappinesss]

You are My Destiny (2020)

Summary

On-board a cruise ship bound for the Bahamas, two people from separate worlds have a chance encounter, transforming them into one another's destiny. The mousy and unassertive admin assistant, Chen Jia Xin meets the handsome, educated, and charming Wang Xi Yi heir to a large toiletries conglomerate. Mistaken identities serve to complicate their impromptu one-night stand, which ensures further contact, once back on land.

Family pressures arise from the pregnancy that has Jia Xin agreeing to contract marriage with a divorce clause. The child once born, will remain with Xi Yi, who will marry the woman he loves, dancer, and long-time girlfriend, Shi Anna.

Meddling and miscommunication lead to a tragic event. A heart-broken Jia Xin runs away from her feelings and Xi Yi to Hungary where her friend and art broker Dylan is headquartered. Over the following three years, she will establish herself as a potter, thanks to the tutelage of a prominent mentor. Dylan is ever supportive and finds himself developing feelings for Jia Xin.

Separation from Jia Xin finds Xi Yi maturing into someone certain of desiring a family. Meanwhile, he must fend off the advances of the delusional Anna, who's plotting to get him back. Dylan remains steadfast in his quest to locate his long-lost sister, with whom he was separated as a child.

Fate and a business deal will reunite Jia Xin and Xi Yi in Hungary. As their shared history and future possibilities converge it's as if they had never been apart.

Review

This review may contain spoilers

It’s Cheating!

You Are My Destiny is the kind of drama whereby you need to ignore the morals behind the actions of the protagonists or create excuses for their behavior in order to enjoy the story. Basically, the main character cheated on his girlfriend by having a one night stand with another woman he met on a cruise. The woman who slept with him also knows that he has a girlfriend. Granted that the girlfriend stood him up and they were both drunk when they did it. If you can accept this excuse, then well and good. You might go on to enjoy the story. But if not, the story that unfolds could make you hate the guy even more. In short, Xi Yi is not your typical romantic hero. His behavior in the first half of the drama would not endear him to many. In fact, some may even find him to be a jerk. He got Jia Xin pregnant, forced to marry her, and then kept quiet about the marriage and the fact that he is going to be a father from Anna for a few months. Again, the excuse is he is going to divorce Jia Xin anyway and that such news is better told face-to-face. But then, he also starts to fall for Jia Xin. At some point of the drama, it is as if Xi Yi doesn’t want to give up either woman! Plot Development (Spoilers Alert!) Personally, I’m not so judgmental about the morality of the main characters or the lack of it in the story. But as the plot develops and inches towards the last quarter of the drama, it begins to feel lacking in some ways. Xi Yi and Anna seem to be a couple again. But there is no explanation on what makes Xi Yi re-consider his relationship with Anna apart from her refusal to give up. Then, when he meets Jia Xin again, there is a sense of deja vu. He drops Anna in favor of Jia Xin whom he still loves. Xi Yi’s relationship with Anna is never fully explored as she is made to be the evil one for the main characters to appear good overall. Jia Xin’s brief fling with Dylan is also weird in terms of plot development. It feels to me as if they have to stretch the drama a bit longer by throwing in a fling that doesn’t seem to have any romantic notions to it. You wouldn’t even know that they are dating if you don’t follow their conversations closely. Add in Xi Yi’s online persona, Mr. W, and Jia Xin’s emotions seem like a mess to me since she is falling for a stranger she is messaging with while still feeling attached to Xi Yi. Then, she starts dating Dylan who pretends to be Mr. W when all along she has never had any romantic love for him. All these are happening within the last few episodes. Hence, I think they should have stuck to a simpler plot as the story moves towards its conclusion rather than making it more convoluted than it should. Adding in more things that fall flat doesn’t contribute anything to the storyline to me especially when it is approaching a happy ending. My Verdict If you are looking for a rom-com like Intense Love, You Are My Destiny doesn’t belong to that category. But neither is it so melodramatic like Here To Heart. There are some crying scenes but nothing that will weigh you down heavily. If you want fluff and sweetness as well as enjoy a more natural relationship progression, then you are better off watching Love Designer instead. For this You Are My Destiny review, I’m prepared to give it only a 3.5/10 rating. You can watch it for the Xing Zhao Lin and Liang Jie pairing as this couple have grown very comfortable with each other after working together in the Eternal Love series. Hence, their on-screen interactions are definitely easy on the eyes and they emit a natural couple vibe, more so than Xing Zhao Lin’s pairing with Bai Lu in Lucky’s First Love to me. You can check out some of their scenes in the above clip for a sampling of their chemistry. However, to enjoy You Are My Destiny, you really have to be able to get into the plot as I don’t think it will resonate easily with everybody. If you absolutely hate two-timing characters, my recommendation would be to drop it and watch something else! And if you are a Liang Jie fan, you can always check out Mr. Honesty which is a slightly better drama in

terms of relationship development to me. To be honest , I really regretted watching this drama

[setyoonbumfree]

A Brief Intro to KS, Madness, Ethical Readership (and Me)

I first became acquainted with Koogi’s manhwa Killing Stalking in early 2017, when I stumbled upon this now-immensely popular music video– https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hYAxMW65RcM

The MV sparked my interest in the comic, which I have been hooked on ever since.  Due to Koogi’s beautiful drawing and engaging storyline, I consider this my favorite manga.  It’s a volatile, disturbing mix of tragedy, violence, mystery, suspense, pornography, and romance that makes me feel horny and horrified at the same time.

For those of you who have never read KS before, or for readers who need a refresher, here’s a brief summary of its plot: Yoon Bum, the protagonist, is a scrawny, boyish-looking 28 year old* whose parents died in his childhood.  An only child, he was placed under the care of his paternal uncle who beat and raped him since young.  This constant abuse shatters Bum’s self-worth, causing him to grow up isolated and starved for affection.  In his youth, Bum had aborted romances with two women: a prostitute (?, see chpt 25) and a classmate**.  In college, Bum becomes infatuated with a student: Sangwoo, a handsome 24 year old* stud with a tantalizingly ripped physique. However, the shy and unassertive Bum lacks the courage to approach Sangwoo and his affection remains one-sided for a long time. 

Unbeknownst to Bum, Sangwoo is a psychopath: a misogynistic, homophobic serial killer who murdered his parents.  Also an only child, Woo is an extrovert whose emotional deficiencies fuel his urge to dominate others.  Haunted by some unknown childhood trauma, Sangwoo gets a high out of murdering young women: he lures them to his house where he (probably) rapes them, maims their legs, and tortures them in his basement for several days before dismembering them.  Sangwoo’s abusive father is his only male victim to date.

One day, Bum breaks into Sangwoo’s house in an attempt to get closer to his crush only to discover he has entered a house of horrors.  Sangwoo discovers Bum poking around in the basement and maims Bum’s legs to prevent him from escaping.  From then on, Bum becomes his prisoner and (sex) slave.  As the story progresses, Woo exploits Bum’s emotional frailties, and the twisted relationship between these broken individuals descends further into sex, violence, and madness.  Though initially disgusted by the idea of gay sex, Woo warms to the idea after growing closer to Bum, and later uses sex as a tool to fulfill his fantasies of domination and to subjugate Bum rather than to express love.  In contrast, Bum undergoes several dramatic transformations: from a captive he becomes Woo’s live-in maid, then his accomplice in crime, and eventually, his lover.  

Their twisted, Stockholm syndrome-like devotion to each other, their love–if I can even call it that–is one born of their mutual frailties: Woo realizes that Bum is the only person crazy enough to still love him despite his horrific crimes, and can’t bear to kill him.  In contrast, Bum, in his lust and desperation for affection, helplessly clings to Woo, whose violent and demeaning sexual overtures he mistakes for expressions of true love.  Bum’s naivety, lust, and inferiority complex cloud his judgment: despite having the opportunity to turn Woo (and by necessity, himself) over to the cops, he willingly stays with Woo and lavishes him with sexual favors because he thinks they’re in a loving relationship.  Tragically, he fails to see that he’s little more than Woo’s submissive sex slave and punching bag.  He reminds me of a battered girlfriend who lacks the willpower to leave her abusive boyfriend because she’s been brainwashed to think she doesn’t deserve anyone better.

While some readers may romanticize their affection because it “looks cute/hot”, I do not ship the couple. Though I guiltily admit that I find their sex scenes arousing, I honestly believe Bum deserves better (Seungbae perhaps? XD).  

My blog’s name reflects my sincere wish for Koogi to give her story a happy ending: for Bum to be free of his chronic loneliness, helplessness, angst, and–most importantly–to be free of Woo.  Bum can only be truly free when he first realizes the misguidedness of his love for Woo, which is the root of his mental imprisonment.  Call me old-fashioned, but I believe in justice: the wicked should be punished, the innocent protected.  Woo deserves the death penalty, or lifelong imprisonment in an asylum.  While I believe Bum should pay for his crime, I also believe he deserves someone who truly respects and cares for him, and I hope he finds redemption and love in the end.

While I feel reluctant to foist a single “right” interpretation on a work as complex as KS, I would like to suggest the following: though we are reading fiction, we have an ethical responsibility not to idealize Bum and Woo’s relationship, or to allow ourselves to let Woo off the hook on account of his good looks.  Koogi’s genius is to have created a charming villain (similar to John Milton’s Satan, or Frank Underwood from House of Cards): an antagonist so seductive, so impressively herculean that our inhibitions are disarmed and we hesitate to condemn him.  We’re almost rooting for him to escape justice–that’s in large part due to the seductive power of Koogi’s drawing and writing, if you ask me.  But if we allow ourselves to let our mental defenses down, we confuse a villain for a hero; we let Woo manipulate us as he has the rest of the world, and we commit the same mistake Bum has made–we fall for a madman.

This blog is my homage to Koogi’s masterpiece, and a cathartic diary that allows me to clarify my thoughts on the story’s complexities.  Time permitting, I will post on ideas, symbols, themes, or patterns in KS that I find especially striking.  Readers are welcome to send me questions or comments.

I’m currently a Literature major in university; I live in Asia, and like Bum–I’m a guy, which means I’m a rarity in terms of this manga’s readership.  I think that most of its readers are (young) girls, which is typical of yaoi.  In my conservative country, I cannot openly discuss subjects relating to same-sex love, much less a manga as explicit as this one.  As I do not have any friends who read this manga, I hope to exchange my views with fellow readers in the Tumblr community.

A few disclaimers: I’m not an expert on the fandom community or its lingo, so please be patient with me if I’m slow on the uptake.  Also, I’m still learning how to use Tumblr, so I will need some trial and error to learn the finer points of tagging/reblogging/posting/replying.

As I feel similar in certain respects to Bum, I shall sign off my first post, and all future ones, with the initials of the character I feel so much pity and empathy for.

        –YB

*I have guesstimated their ages.

** Because of this, I consider Bum bisexual, just like Woo, who was initially heterosexual before Bum “converted” him.

[the-angel-of-filth]

A new ref for one of my newer ocs, Mahlah (the main protagonist of VITW Verse)!!

They’re a greenhorn diplomat on the behalf of their forest community, Sequoio, hoping to one day become the first albino redwood to become an official ambassador. Since albino plants aren’t able to produce chlorophyll as their main food source, Mahlah exclusively relies on their parent redwood (which I have yet to design and name) and animal meat (a common supplement for plants) to get nutrients.

Of course, being new to the job and being an albino tree, their endeavors are difficult. Despite plants like Mahlah being relatively rare and usually unassertive in nature, others see them as parasitic and few believe them to be something like a vampire (and yes, there’s plant “vampire” hunters out there but they are generally dismissed as twisted dogmatical vigilantes). Mahlah is being assigned to their first diplomatic operation where they’ll go to their first conference. Accompanied by their best friend, a black witch’s butter mushroom (name pending) and their parent redwood, they plan to travel together to a neighboring state of Lur for this job.

During their travels, Mahlah and their friends come across some… odd folks. Traveling in the world of Florusborne, it’s not unusual to run into some really weird people and some unexpected troubles from Mother Nature. But this time around, Mahlah feels like they’re being stalked. Not by a herbivorous beast or anything like that. But it’s almost as if they just saw someone out there. A bit concerning, perhaps… it's probably nothing, right?

[recentanimenews]

Shojo Fight, Vol. 1

Shojo FIGHT! Volume 1 by Yoko Nihonbashi

I’m very happy about Kodansha’s recent investment in digital manga, since it means that some titles that might be not commercial enough to get a print release are being translated. At the same time, I’ve been burned by digital manga in the past, and I only have so much budgeted for digital comics a month, so I’ve been a little picky with my purchases. I was very interested to see a girls volleyball title coming out from Kodansha, because I do enjoy a good sports manga. The first volume of Shojo FIGHT! is largely set-up for the whole series, and it packs an impressive amount of drama in one short volume.

Neri spends her time on the bench for her middle school volleyball team. She seems to be content to be incredibly unassertive and dismissed, but she has a group of friends and fans who look after her. The manga starts by showing the dynamics of Neri’s current team. Koyuki seems to be noticed as much for her looks as her volleyball talent, while Chiyo is the seemingly evil teem member who is comfortable saying horrible things to everyone. While Neri doesn’t do much in the way of athletics in the first few pages, it is clear that she has the aura of somebody special. Neri has a built in fanclub that includes Odagiri, a girl who spends her time drawing volleyball manga. There are also the brothers Shikishima. The younger blond Shikishima is a carefree volleyball player while his his older brother with the dark hair has the burden of being the heir to his family’s osteopathic clinic, having magic injury soothing fingers, and also playing volleyball.

When Neri does get off the bench, it is clear that she’s been hiding her skills as well as her single-minded intensity towards the sport of volleyball. Part of the reason why she’s been able to hide so long is because her school tends to give starting positions based on the height of the players. Neri becomes aggressive and vocal, yelling at Koyuki to get her head in the game. Neri and Koyuki end up colliding when they go after the same ball. Neri’s travails in volleyball would be enough to carry this volume, but she also has a family tragedy that she’s dealing with as well. Slowly the details are revealed as the story progresses, and while Neri’s set up for a different type of volleyball career as she enters high school, she’s still dealing with plenty of baggage. It seems like her friends are always going to be around to support her, especially Shikishima the elder.

Part of my enjoyment of Shojo FIGHT! is due to the novelty factor. Perhaps because I haven’t been able to read many female-oriented sports manga, I found Neri’s portrayal as a volleyball hero with athletic prowess and intensity that could cause situations to get out of control refreshing, just because I’m much more used to seeing this type of character as a male protagonist. If this had been the 5th female volleyball manga that I’d read instead of the 2nd, I might not find it quite as charming though. Other reviewers have noted that the art of this volume looks very similar to OEL manga, with smooth dark lines, sparse backgrounds, and lacking the delicacy that most shoujo fans might expect. I was halfway wondering if it was as I was reading it if it was OEL, but as I looked up Shojo FIGHT, it indeed came out in Japan originally in the mid 2000s. Nihonbashi’s style made me wonder if it really was that unique, or if it comes down to just the type of series that tend to get translated for a North American audience. Nihonbashi’s high contrast style gives Shojo FIGHT a more graphic, less flowery sort of look, and while she is good at facial expressions, I did find myself wondering at times if Neri had variants of her stunned and shell shocked look as she grapples with her emotions. I did enjoy all the distinctive character designs. With such a large cast, having distinct looks for the characters helps the reader greatly.

There was enough drama for two volumes in the first volume of Shojo FIGHT!, but at the same time I’m reserving judgement a bit, because I expect the narrative to settle down in the second volume. I’m hoping to see if Neri is able to fight off her inner demons a bit for the sake of volleyball.

By: Anna N

[myownbestblog]

Funny Honey

Show: Chicago

Character: Roxie Hart

Time Period: 1920s

Style/Mood: blues, jazz, ballad, sultry, scheming, angry, romantic, comedic, crime, manipulation, manipulative, serpentine, cunning, crafty, loving, superior, condescending, sexy, seductive, slow, frustrated, love, affair, adultery, murder, trick, deceit, deceitful, false, betrayal, hatred, murder, cover-up

Character Type: lead, star, performer, protagonist, vaudeville, murder, murderer, murderess, adultery, adulterer, adulterous, adulteress, temptress, murderous, jail, criminal, dancer, singer, angry, crass, rival, new, inexperienced, fake, false, phony, condescending, celebrity, villain, patronizing, disdainful, superior, haughty, unfaithful, dishonest, liar, deceptive, sexy, seductive, cheater, opportunist, killer, felon, tactless, famous, proud, arrogant, conceited, self-important, selfish, fraud, disloyal, sensual, opportunistic, puppet, wife, enthusiastic, fervent, lover, girlfriend, client, adored, loved, uncouth, greedy, materialistic, attention-seeking, rejected, hurt, crude, unhappy, self-serving, lucky, paramour, covetous, immature, center of attention, stage, self-reliant, creative, crafty, persevering, resolute, tenacious, unyielding, quick-thinking, persistent, determined, cunning, sneaky, sly, ambitious, confident, poised, self-assured, composed, dramatic, melodramatic, theatrical, exaggerated, sensational, bubbly, personality, divorced, funny, pessimistic, optimistic, afraid, fearful, nervous, anxious, lowbrow, underhanded, lost, boy-crazy, lively, energetic, dynamic, Fosse, triple threat, jazz, powerful, glamorous, racy, showy, feisty; husband, divorced, duped, foolish, sap, gullible, naïve, sad, cheated on, susceptible, trusting, innocent, simple, sweet, father, humble, unassuming, meek, invisible, inconsequential, low self-esteem, ignored, modest, self-effacing, unassertive, unimpressive, undistinguished, timid, submissive, tender, gentle, docile, insignificant, overlooked, unnoticed, disregarded, butt of the joke, character, comedic, slow, dumb, stupid, mechanic, loyal, faithful, devoted, reliable, dependable, loving, forgiving, pathetic, loser; police, officer, stern, strict, lawful, sarcastic, sardonic

Age: young adult/adult

Vocal Type: mezzo

Popularity: Chicago is a well-known musical, but this song is not as popular as other songs in the show. Still a well-known song.

Composer: John Kander

Race: not specified

Famous Performers: Gwen Verdon, Ann Reinking, Ruthie Henshall, Renee Zellweger

Type of Song: Solo

Song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JQcSM1hr1xk