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repriseofthereprise · 4 months

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Separatism is Not a Luxury

By C. Maria

In Lesbian Ethics Vol 4 No 1 Spring 1990

Julia Penelope, in “The Mystery of Lesbians,” asks, “HOW, in spite of derision, incarceration, violence, and poverty, do we find the courage TO CREATE OURSELVES??”(1) This question rekindled my anger at having been unemployed for two years following college graduation in 1986, as well as at the poverty many women are forced to endure. But as an Afra-Latina Radical Dyke living and working in racist heteropatriarchy,(2) I was next brought to consider the current phallocratic system and wondered how possible it would be for Lesbian Separatists to move beyond a focus on class.

My point in this paper is that socialist feminists are wrong in insisting Lesbians focus on class. They dismiss the connection between economic deprivation and the sexual caste system, where men make women’s lives almost unlivable. We live in a world that is ready to prepare our funeral pyres daily.(3) Many Lesbians, in focussing on class, have missed the importance of separatism, which is to make our Lesbian lives livable in the present. This is not living “one day at a time.” Rather, Lesbians must be active, creative, and rigorous participants in our present reality. To that end I conclude with A Proposal.

Socialism Is Not the Answer

Most women could care less about separatism. This purposeful ignorance not only comes from non-feminists and anti-feminists, but also from feminists who should know better, yet choose to ignore separatism even as a possibility. Some of this ignorance is caused by the fear of male reprisals. But fear alone has not stopped many Lesbians and Radical Feminists from envisioning a world free from male oppression and violence. So what else is behind this ignorance?

The only way to account for this dismissal is the belief among liberal and socialist/left-wing heterosexual and lesbian feminists that some men, particularly poor men and ethnically different men, are more oppressed than women in general. They say these men do not benefit from the sexual oppression of women. bell hooks even goes as far as to justify male sexual crimes committed against women and to argue that men are the real victims.

Alienated, frustrated, pissed off, he may attack, abuse, and oppress any individual woman or women, but he is not reaping the benefits from his support of sexist ideology. When he beats or rapes women, he is not exercising privilege or reaping any positive rewards; he may feel satisfied in exercising the only form of domination allowed him [emphases mine].(4)

In fact, physical and sexual abuse that come from male heterosexual privilege are so pervasive and oppressive, that less privileged and LEAST privileged women often DO become Lesbian Separatists.

Those who see Lesbian Separatism as classist and racist deny the lives of Lesbian Separatists, most of whom are not privileged. For example, hooks sees separatism as purely a class issue.

Most women do not have the economic freedom to separate from men because of economic interdependence. The separatist notion that women could resist sexism by withdrawing contact with men reflects a bourgeois class perspective.(5)

hooks assumes all Separatists are white and privileged. But if Separatism derived from a “bourgeois class perspective,” most of the more privileged lesbians would be Separatists, or at least give separatism some serious consideration. And there would be few racially and ethnically different Separatists or less privileged Separatists.

Yet Separatism IS an economic issue. Lesbian Separatists are painfully aware it is racist heteropatriarchy that keeps women poor. No woman, however wealthy, has unrevocable power. All men however poor, have some unrevocable power.(6) In patriarchal heteroeconomy,(7) ALL women are economically bound to men. Jeffner Allen explains this dilemma:

Although we choose to live as lesbians, we are obliged … to stand in relation to the patriarchal economy … We are obliged to stand in relation to men, especially to secure food, water, shelter, clothing, and frequently, for the goods and money that must be exchanged for such commodities.(8)

Any woman who separates, however partially, from a man or men, will suffer economically. Living as a Separatist entails taking the risk that racist heteropatriarchy can, at any time, withdraw the only means of support available to us for obtaining basic necessities and maintaining any quality of life. Becoming a Separatist means that a Lesbian has placed integrity above any other consideration that would unnecessarily bind her to men.

Socialist feminists, however, would say less privileged women must remain allied with men IN OUR GROUP, because it would be in “our” best interests. But less privileged men still equate their interests with the interests of “our group.” If women follow the socialist feminist prescription, they will remain the economic and sexual slaves of the men they are forced to serve. “Freedom,” for socialist feminists, means keeping solidarity with less economically privileged men no matter how sexually, physically, or psychically abusive they are to the women who have the misfortune to be around or involved with these men. Women are not allowed to separate from men for any reason.

According to Alison Jaggar:

What the politics of total separatism ignores, however, is that some groups of women have interests in common with some groups of men. Working-class women have interests in common with working-class men; Jewish women have interests in common with Jewish men; differently able women have interests in common with differently able men; and women of color have interests in common with men of color.(9)

What Jaggar doesn’t explain is how women of color, Jewish women, working-class women, and differently able women, despite a strong commitment to ending all oppression, still have the fortitude to be Separatists. Yet socialist feminists call working-class, Semitic,(10) differently able, Afra-Amerikan, Latina, Native Amerikan, and Asian Amerikan Lesbian Separatists racist, classist, antisemitic, ableist, and ageist.

Jaggar continues:

… a politics of total separatism is necessarily classist and racist no matter how far classism and racism are eradicated inside womanculture. In part, it is classist and racist because access to the womanculture is more difficult for poor women and women of color, just as it is more difficult for such women to be exclusively lesbian. On the most fundamental level … total separatism is classist and racist because it denies the importance of class and race divisions … Consequently, it can never be effective in bringing about far-reaching social transformation [emphasis mine].(11)

Jaggar contradicts herself immediately in this statement. If classism and racism are done away with in “womanculture,” why does she still see it as classist and racist? The contradiction doesn’t bother her, or else she would have given this comment more thought. Everything desirable is more difficult for less privileged women to obtain. But she chose to focus on the idea that less privileged women are supposedly unable to be Lesbians. Her mentality is the same as that of many socialist countries, such as Cuba, which proclaim Lesbians are the result of regressive, perverse, bourgeois influence. They uphold compulsory heterosexuality by making criminals out of Lesbians.

Socialist feminism suffers from a lack of moral and ethical intelligence. When socialist feminists tell us we are classist and racist for being Lesbian Separatists, they are hiding their own moral failure to consider the same for themselves. Socialist feminists assume economically, racially, and ethnically oppressed women are not intelligent enough to make our lives as livable as possible, or to choose our beliefs and how best to act on them. They assume we must be “rescued” and placed back in the “graces” of racist heteropatriarchy.

It is impossible for Lesbian Separatists, especially racially and ethnically different Lesbian Separatists to ignore race and economics because these are our daily reality. We understand very well what divides us. And however real many of these dichotomies are, we NAME the agents responsible for the imposed FALSE differences.

While Lesbian Separatism cannot afford to ignore race and economics, it is the strength of our diversities AND similarities that will bring about a REAL social transformation, one far beyond the reach of socialist feminism.

The Bottom Line

Many feminists, particularly liberal and socialist feminists, will defend working in the male economy on the basis that doing so will increase our socio-economic standing. But, as Jeffner Allen states men, not women, achieve a monetary advantage.(12)

Class status is something possessed by men working in patriarchal heteroeconomy. Women do not have class status. The male class structure defines and prescribes women’s economic, emotional, and sexual servitude to men, while the patriarchal heteroeconomy constructs the concrete basis for women’s economic oppression. Patriarchal heteroeconomy, by paying women the lowest wages, coerces us into remaining under racist heteropatriarchal domination. Sexual terrorism in the workplace extends women’s continued servitude beyond the realm of the phallocratic household. In turn this terrorism forces women into the “private” sphere, where the terrorism can continue in secrecy. Like rape and pornography, sexual terrorism in the workplace tells women what men think of our presence, our existence, and our place in racist heteropatriarchy.

Women do not acquire class status on our own merit, but rather as socio-economic, political, and sexual attachments to males. Any woman who refuses to be a male attachment loses the “benefits” of the male economy. The Lesbian Separatist is not part of the patriarchal heteroeconomy. Nor is any woman who is not attached to a man.

Poverty is something not fully belonging to patriarchal heteroeconomy. The levels of the class structure imply that members have “upward” mobility.(13) This mobility is a phallic mobility. Women, not phallic beings, are automatically excluded. In order to survive, unattached women, including Lesbian Separatists, work in the male economic system performing tasks that define our lack of class status. We are forced to live like stationary migrant workers, who must earn our keep and never protest our condition, lest we sink further into degradation.

Women’s lack of our own class status can be seen most clearly in the “service” industries, such as restaurants and diners, corporate offices, and retail stores. Women are the majority of low-level workers in these industries. We often work 8 or more hours a day, frequently at minimum wage. Some jobs, particularly in restaurants, pay below the minimum, forcing women to live on tips received for smiling, being courteous, and being compliant.(14) These jobs require little educational training and offer few opportunities for promotion or increased wages. It is not surprising that these jobs have the highest turnover rates, because the women who do them are easily expendable.

By having women perform degrading and repetitive tasks, men in control of the patriarchal heteroeconomy can continue to do whatever they choose without thinking about the consequences. Men continue, with total confidence, to waste and destroy, knowing they have conditioned women well to clean up for them. Women

…take on the dirty work, to take charge of the material and psychic rubble … [to] yield simply another variation … of female self-sacrifice and female housework: sweeping up the ruins of patriarchy.(15)

The Lesbian Separatist has chosen to defy men, to hate men,(16) in order to be for women and for our freedom to be our Selves. The price to maintain our integrity is often poverty, violence, degradation, and the denial of basic necessities. Despite the poverty suffered and the obstacles placed in front of us, we know we are right.(17) And because of the joy and freedom we radiate, our enemies know we are right.

Consider the case of the Masai warriors, a group of pastoralists that live in Kenya and parts of Tanzania. Although the women take care of the cattle, the source of the group’s wealth, their husbands are the owners, and the cattle are passed down to their sons. If a woman gives birth only to daughters or is unable to give birth, she is ostracized and is forced to live on her own. She is not valued as a woman in her own right. She is valued only if she takes care of the cattle and gives her husband sons. Her daughters will not be able to take care of her when she is old. They must leave when they are married off to men in neighboring villages, forced to repeat the same pattern their mother suffered when she was younger.(18)

Since power given to women by men is revocable, no woman can be said to be economically wealthy, because she does not live in an economy or a society based on female values.

A Proposal

Many feminists do not want to acknowledge how comfortable they have become with their heterosexual privilege within the oppressive system that many other women want to leave behind. They continue to ask for a few privileges for themselves, while conditions for most women remain unchanged. Few feminists any longer propose the abolition of racist heteropatriarchy, because to do so they would have to confront their own complicity and the painful subordination men have forced upon women through terrorism, indoctrination, deprivation, and lies.(19)

We can start, even in modest ways, to disrupt the male economy. Lesbian Separatists and Radical feminists have already begun, by refusing to be with men, or to cater to their needs, desires, and whims in our personal/political lives. Although heterosexual women can also contribute to this disruption, through sabotage, it is unlikely they will place themselves and other women above male priorities.

Lesbian Separatists can do much more:

We can disrupt patriarchal heteroeconomy through the barter system, where goods and services are exchanged directly for each other rather than for money. For example, if I need to have my broken window replaced, I would have a friend who is an expert glazier replace my window in exchange for my fixing her car when needed, in the present or the future. We both obtain what we need without the exchange of money. We can also create our own monetary system through the use of a voucher system only Dykes networking together would recognize. These vouchers could be used to obtain basic necessities and services from Dykes with specialized skills.

A similar form of disruption is to refuse to pay taxes. Most of the tax money paid goes directly to the phallo-military waste machine to invent more weapons to annihilate sentient life. The rest is used to keep so-called elected and appointed “officials” and corporate “officers” in the death-dealing, white, heterosexual male system wealthy. The two most recent, blatant examples are the theft of millions of dollars of federal housing money and the theft of billions of dollars by savings and loan executives. The system of taxes is another form of male parasitism, draining women’s energy through degrading work to feed their insatiable greed and hatred for life.

There are “illegal” methods that can be pursued, such as counterfeiting money, tapping into the money supply, which is regulated by computers, disrupting business on Wall Street and other financial centers where the business of patriarchal heteroeconomics is conducted each day.

We can organize ourselves into cadres of thieves and shoplifters to steal basic necessities and money for our daily living. With increased skill, we can also teach other Dykes how to steal.

We can squat in abandoned buildings and renovate them for living and/or political action purposes. Lesbians are often denied space, even by feminists. Renovating buildings would be a good way to re/claim our much needed space to think and act toward our well-being.

For those who have female children, we can refuse to send them to public and so-called private schools. We can instead create our own Radical Lesbian schools. Some fundamentalist christians have resisted sending their children to public schools, because, in their opinion, racist heteropatriarchal values are not promoted enough. They actually want to take control of the public school system by taking away the few “reforms” education has been allowed to make. Christians notwithstanding, most schools continue to teach racist heteropatriarchal values and to promote “great” white men, while women are ignored or shown only in stereotypically “supporting” roles. The agents of the monetary tax system are running a protection racket on the educational system, so that it will accept money on the agents’ terms. A Radical Lesbian education would be based on values that maintain our moral intelligence and integrity. We can learn about our foresisters’ lives, struggle, and achievements and about what is being done in the present.

Some feminists have proposed destroying the system by working within the male economy, especially at a bank or large corporation, but giving the money to our causes. There is nothing inherently wrong with taking the money we earn from our jobs in patriarchal heteroeconomy and using it for Lesbian causes. It is a good strategy to give back energy to our Selves and each other. We need to find every possible way to get money from the male economy for our well-being. But we must understand that any such strategy is short-term and must contribute to long-range goals. It also must be understood that it is very difficult, although not impossible, to work in a corporation, a large business, or government, and simultaneously maintain Radical Dyke perspective and anger.

The corporation, the state, and the heteropatriarchal family all have the same hierarchy and “relational” lines of superiority and subordination. Dissenting women, especially Lesbian Separatists, are removed for not deferring to and being for men. Dissenting women are also held up by the male corporate structure to all other women as examples of what their fate will be if they challenge the system. Women’s reason, intelligence, and anger are fragmented, dissipated, and purposely misaimed(20) in order to maintain corporate power. The male economy needs female complicity, at any expense, up to and including the destruction of women’s knowledge and passion. The corporation is part of the phallic upward mobility scheme. And as we have seen, women cannot achieve upward mobility in patriarchal heteroeconomy.

We must realize that as long as we work in the male economy, females will not benefit from the work men have told us to perform. A crucial step to ending patriarchal heteroeconomy, and ultimately racist heteropatriarchy has been proposed by Susan Cavin and must at the very least be considered by ALL Lesbian Separatists. That is to stop working for men in any capacity.

.. it is when the oppressed stop working for the oppressors … that liberation solutions are actualized. As long as women work in patriarchal economies, they will remain oppressed.(21)

We can be very creative in our methods of disruption. But we have to end the phallic heteroeconomy that perpetuates the male class structure and the male value system. Thus we can continue to create the gynocentric society we have already begun. We must act now, because we have recognized the racist heteropatriarchy for what it is; we must “… render it harmless and … see how one goes about living without it.”(22)

Lesbians and our liberation are, and must be, the most important considerations in our lives. To assign our Selves and each other lesser value is to the peril of us all.

Notes

Julia Penelope, “The Mystery of Lesbians: IL” Lesbian Ethics 1:2 (1985), p. 53.

It is impossible to conceive of patriarchy as NOT racist as well as lesbophobic. Therefore I have chosen to expand on the Original insight Julia Penelope had when she coined the term heteropatriarchy, which I first encountered in her article, “WHOSE Past Are We Reclaiming?” Common Lives, Lesbian Lives 13 (Autumn 1984), p. 19.

The Inquisition in Europe has been referred to by Starhawk as The Burning Times. The truth is that since the beginning of racist heteropatriarchy, women’s bodies, minds, and spirits have been immolated in the phallocratic death pyres. The evidence of woman-burning is global because phallocracy is global.

bell hooks, Feminist Theory: From Margin to Center (Boston: South End Press, 1984), p. 73.

ibid., p. 77.

Although this insight/incite has been around the Feminist movement for some time, it is always Original. Among those who have dis-covered this is Anna Lee in her article, “One Black Separatist,” Innerviews 5:3 (1981), p. 31.

A term I have coined to show how the exploitation of all women by men is connected to the economy that maintains heterosexuality as the “standard” and forces women to remain in relation to men.

Jeffner Allen, “Lesbian Economics.” Trivia 8 (Winter 1986), p. 40.

Alison Jaggar, Feminist Politics and Human Nature (Totowa: Rowman and Allanheld, 1983), p. 296.

I have purposely not written “Jewish.” This is not done out of disrespect to Jewish Dyke Separatists, but to include our Arab sisters who are Lesbian Separatists.

Jaggar, Ibid.

Allen, p. 49.

I am not proposing any form of “downward” mobility. When women are earning 0.73 to every dollar men earn, when women who are college graduates earn LESS than men with an eight grade education, when women cannot afford day care for young children, when it is estimated that by the year 2000 virtually all of the poor will be WOMEN AND CHILDREN, we are not “downwardly” mobile. We are IMMOBILE!

A personal/political point After working in several varieties of restaurants in the past years, I have made this observation: Although many men also work in restaurants, they generally are not working in the local greasy-spoon diner or fast-food restaurant. As restaurants become more “up-scale,” catering to the clientele they want to attract, men are seen in these establishments as employees, where pay, benefits and opportunities for advancement are much better. Women are never seen as employees in these restaurants. Do YOU support this instance of oppression by eating in these restaurants anyway?

Christina Thurmer-Rohr. “From Deception to Un-Deception: On the Complicity of Women.” Trivia 12 (Spring 1988), p. 69.

See Jeffner Allen’s discussion on man-hating in her essay, “Remembering: A Time I Will Be My Own Beginning.” In her Lesbian Philosophy: Explorations (Palo Alto: Institute of Lesbian Studies, 1986), pp. 19-24.

Marilyn Frye, “Some Reflections on Separatism and Power.” In her The Politics of Reality: Essays in Feminist Theory (Trumansburg: The Crossing Press, 1983), p. 98.

I first heard about the lives of the Masai women from a movie I saw in a sociology of gender class in April 1985. Their plight is the plight of many women throughout the world including Amerika, where older women, after making many self-sacrifices to raise children and maintain the house, often find themselves with nothing to show for their hard work, especially if the husbands die or divorce them.

There is also an interesting story told about the male ownership of the cattle. In pre-patriarchal history women were the owners of the cattle and were responsible for making all decisions. But a drought came during the summer season and killed all the cattle. Although the drought could not have been prevented, the men blamed the women for the death of the cattle. When they were able to replenish the livestock, the men took everything away from the women, from positions of responsibility to ownership of the cattle. Here we have more evidence that we have not always lived in a patriarchal society. Yet the fact that this story, assigning women blame for a natural disaster, was told by a woman shows female complicity in justifying and maintaining male lies and male control.

Gerda Lerner, The Creation of Patriarchy (New York: Oxford Univ. Press, 1986), p. 217.

See Mary Daly, Pure Lust: Elemental Feminist Philosophy (Boston: Beacon Press, 1984), p. 206-7, for her discussion on women’s passions and knowledge and how they are fragmented and dissipated by racist heteropatriarchy.

Susan Cavin, Lesbian Origins (San Francisco: Ism Press, 1985), p. 153. 22Thurmer-Rohr, p. 74.

Thurmer-Rohr, p.. 74.

#race and class

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dbjofsbk · 1 year

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This awful stress and true peace

03.23.2034

This awful headache. The stress that chases sleep from my nights and keeps my soul from peace. I got respite from it all tonight at worship. Worship at our church on a Thursday night at 8pm, for only the second time in In Com's history. It felt good. It felt life-affirming, it felt life-sustaining, it felt like God was giving me room to breathe in that space along with that collective of souls. It felt good. Thank you God for giving me the gift of worship in your name tonight. Life is scary when the next step is unknown and even worse, when the decision comes down.. when I execute.. when I ask.. and the question itself is a mistake.. in the real world, with real world consequences for my company, for my boss, for me, for the relationship, it is terrifying. But it needs to be done. Because without progress thereis no growth. And it has to be my next step or it's not my growth. Internally, spiritually, or externally, in my life in the office, or without. And God knows that. And God knows that I know that and that I fear that and that therefore, I shy away from that. But shying away from that is not what will help me at this stage in my life when I am twenty eight, going on twenty nine. That is not what will leave a lasting legacy into my thirties and beyond for me right now. Right now is my opportunity to ask the questions, to take the next step. It may be wobbly, but I will ask for grace to make my steps as firm as God deems sufficient. For His plan and not mine. For my plan to be part of His plan- for His will to be obeyed and executed faithfully. That I may be a vessel for His will. That I may be true creation. Face to face with my God. In conversation with my God. With my God walking with me in my life, in this world, in HIs kingdom.

Tonight's Scripture reading was Matthew 3:13-17

Then Jesus came from Galilee to the Jordan to be baptized by John. But John tried to deter him, saying. "I need to be baptized by you, and do you come to me?" Jesus replied, "Let it be so now; it is proper for us to do this to fulfill all righteousness." Then John consented. As soon as Jesus was baptized, he went up out of the water. At that moment heaven was opened and he saw the Spirit of God descending like a dove and alighting on him. And a voice from heaven said, "This is my Son, whom I love; with him I am well pleased."

Mixed with reflections on Timothy Keller's sermon via podcast preached on March 4, 2007 at Redeemer Presbyterian Church. Mark 14:29-31; 53-54; 66-72.

Jesus is my advocate in heaven, standing at the right side of God. In the court of heaven, my lawyer, my advocate is Jesus Christ. My righteousness is in heaven, in his kingdom, not here, not judged or ordained or administered by people, by the world.

Jesus being my advocate, even till now, says Paul- does not mean that Jesus stands up before God the Judge, saying, 'Lord, it's your daughter again. She promised just last night she would never do it again, but she did it again today. Can you please give her a chance? For me, just do it for me, please.'

That is not Christ Jesus's advocacy on my behalf. It is this- Lord, your daughter sinned again today, when she swore, when she promised she wouldn't do it yesterday. I have already paid the price for her sin. So it is not fair for you to ask for the price for the same sin twice. This is paid in full. The debt is cleared by me. The balance is restored forever and nothing more can be asked in repayment for her sins.

And so, through the advocacy of Christ Jesus on my behalf, I am justified in the eyes of God. I am whole and perfect and righteous in the eyes of God. I am, in other words, God's daughter, whom he loves, with her I am well pleased.

Because Christ Jesus secured that eternal, unrevocable, undeserved privilege for me to stand before God without burning up and dying on the spot. I can meet the face of God, I can stand in His presence, I can talk to Him, I can pray to Him, I can meet Him, again.. like Adam and Eve did in Eden.. because of what Christ Jesus endured on the cross for me. His obedience to his father's commands bought my salvation, through which I've gained true freedom. So I give it up all for Christ, all for God. I choose to put on His yoke, that I may have true, righteous freedom by being new creation in His Kingdom. That I may bring His Kingdom to my reality, even if just in my little corner of the world, even for short bursts of time. It isn't the span of a life that makes it glorious. It's who's made it justified that makes it glorious. The very nature of His being... and that He created me in His image, created to bring His glory to all the earth, his creation, and to glorify Him by reflecting his glory back to Him in a way that only human beings can do.. that only the priests in his temple were created, designed and ordained to do.

HIs mystery.. the mystery of the cross and His love which bought my soul and justified my being and secured me salvation and eternal life and eternal, true peace.. this eternal mystery is forever and ever and I wish to bask in it forever. I wish to know my God, the God of the universe, the God of all.

#ThursdayWorship #TimothyKeller #Prayer

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chalemee · 1 year

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Dear God

Hey I am honestly very idk, but I have been feeling your around me today so thank you but I must confess my back hurts a lot I know it is probably my fault but I wanted to ask you to take this pain away this is and forever will be my safe place. I wonder ... Honestly i wish I was more in my self to speak to you but I am just cooling down from a long day honestly I probably should go to the gym again my work out was weak today and my calories where more then anticipated. Father I have received many revelations and answers to the things I had been asking because they do not make sense in my heart I dont understand the unecessary deaths. I can not judge them because they did not know better but did you disappear those nations the fallen ones truly for the desire in their heart in honesty I feel like it was their ignorance that doomed them but idk beuase I dont know what it was like to be them soo many years so millenias so many centuries and I am here today. I dont hold judgement against you but I do ask why so much darkness why has that been allowed my father why not free them from the cages in their heart and mind what is the point of free will if nothing is as it seems is the truth really deep inside of us all are they really choosing to follow those steps I am gaining my willingness to live through you God because I myself had lost it so as the insignificant spec in the unverse me with my heart and my soul with all that I am look at the things that I suffere and endure look at the things I go through some are beyond imagination and purely amazing but others are not so great honestly back then I felt like I had more of understanding maybe I realy just need to meditate in you this week was not good.. I should pray more seek you more often I have sinned in my spirit form and been bad and I am sorry creator I an disgusted at my actions in the spirit realms these things no longer ecxute me nore attract my passion nor desire it use too but pure heart and honest to my self and God I dont want it I rather pledge my unrevocable loyalty and my bloods loyalty to you I ask that you forgive. my ancestors and those who came before me and who will come after to forgive our ways and hope you always humble us and take care of our hearts to always serve the highest good of you conciousness your love and light I dont want the riches of the earth but I want the freedom of the universe I dont want to live in abundance bt harmony in a place where the songs that play are those of love creation and magic where the water flow and the spirit is free father please....... do not forget about us. I pray that you shower us with yur gold with your grace love and health and I hope that every part of my being honors you and serves you in every way shape or for I ask that my existence be one of love and creation t serve all those around me in aiding a better existence for the universe. I ask that with every breath the wheel of time trancends those things that make reality into something better and I ask that the course of time with every flutter of my eyes by stillness of my breath this aids the universe and my creator in carying the purest essence of love and washing that we no longer wish to see or feel in this world one far greator where all the kings and queens of the land are safe and never forgotten but honored and celebrated for their unques that where created for the fullfillment of our God in the name of the son the father and the holy spirit amen.

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mxgilray · 3 years

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Did you not see the interview with the actress that was literally called "Sophia Di Martino on fighting and falling in love" where she talks about Sylvie's feelings for Loki? Or are you just ignoring it because you don't like the ship? Because methinks it's the latter. If you don't like the pairing that's fine, but you really shouldn't be arguing with the shippers of a canon ship about why you think it isn't canon. Keep to your own tags pls and leave them alone.

Thank you for being the only dang Sylki shipper actually sourcing their facts! (And not so thanks for being snarky at me for replying to asks people personally sent me. I don't seek out these convos it's all been people getting at me on my blog so maybe check yourself. I tagged Sylki in my posts because I was discussing the ship, people made the choice to get at me for my perspective)

At 5am when fact searching I had missed that one. It does lend weight to the argument that Sophia confirms Sylki, but only a little bit. Having some inkling of attraction that she doesn't really understand is not the same as Sylvie being in love with Loki and does not confirm that her kissing him was supposed to be a declaration of love. Sophia herself referred to the kiss as a parting goodbye.

Like I've stated over and over, I think the way her acting portrayed it was vague and meant to not cement anything. Beyond any behind the scenes interviews, in canon Sylvie's actions don't come across as black and white as people are treating it. That's the whole point I've been trying to make.

#loki spoilers #loki #loki series #I guess I'm banned from tagging sy*lki unless I unrevocably believe it's without a doubt 100% canon and not up for discussion??#like since when is discourse about the finer nuances of an actors portayal not allowed??#I've stated so many times I'm not anti s*lki yet peeps keep accusing me of it because I think the canon purposely made her feelings unclear

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eulchu · 2 years

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i think people would benefit a lot from being a little more self aware and honest to themselves like it's ok to say mean things because you're angry or jealous or hate someone. they treat the stuff they say as unrevocable truth because they're too scared of recognizing these feelings that society has deemed makes you "a bad person". at this point i"d rather you say you're being a bitch because you're angry than just thinking you're right because that just makes you a bitch AND a bigot

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fe3h-incorrectquotes · 3 years

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Typically don't think about poly ships too often but that one anon who said Catherine x F!Byleth x Shamir is just right. I just wanted them to know that their statement is completely unrevocably true.

heya catherine x f!byleth x shamir anon, here’s a message for you!

#not a quote #there is one thing this fandom can agree on and it’s catherine x shamir x f!byleth /j

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hundr3d · 4 years

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I am alone.

Hopelessly alone! Deeply and unrevocably alone!

What most people deemed awful made me feel alive. But now, that I no longer shouted it from the rooftops, I suddenly felt myself terribly alone. No, not the alone away from other people. But the alone that I had walked away from myself.

I am ashamed. I’ll be the first to admit it. I want to cry to mourn the fact that I left her for another. The divine space and time I had created to nourish her was now gone. Surely, I can call her back (hence this message) and truly, it is a simple ordeal. Call her back, get her back, love her full, let it go. But my pride was so caught up in it. I didn’t want to tell a single soul that yes, I kept my whole life intact and nothing budged, but still. For some reason, I felt like I lost something.

There it is again, the inner call of freedom. It calls from somewhere far beyond that I’m not actually able to locate where it comes from. Somewhere within, she calls. These days it’s a faint call. But I don’t want it to be. God, I don’t wish things were different. Things are beautiful. I am just not accustomed to letting her go anymore. I’ve done that so much, and I apologized so heavily, that it feels like I shot myself even walking 2 steps away. I’m sorry, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. Maybe it’s easy but I’m still so sorry. I want her back. I hope to see this through sun filled eyes, no more shadows.

#personal #hundr3d #text

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theairbetween · 2 years

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Loosing yourself.

Loosing yourself means being to close to the other, oversensitive to what they feel, what You are perceiving of them, what they might want. Loosing connection to what You want, and thus to what You are.

Your perceived expectations that they might have of You or You might have of them lead to reactivity to Your own thoughts, since You are always just interpreting - Interpreting what they think or feel or want. But You never know. It's a tough game to distinguish between the two: You might really be sensitive to what other people feel - but You cannot have the arrogance to assume that You actually know what is happening in the other. That would mean to ossify their aliveness.

That is why You should always ask.

The big question lies in how to deal with this sensitivity. Do I perceive it and act on it? Possibly also just re-act to something? Or do I perceive it and just take it inside of me, be pregnant with it - and at the same time not loose that which is me, that which created the sensitivity, the feeling, the thought. Do I manage to keep feeling my center throughout everything I do, to every possible reaction to someone or something? I am empowered and I do not get caught up between the lines of battle between ego and reception and perceived wishes.

There is another thought that comes to mind now which is the one of certainty. We live in a society that is addicted to certainty. Addicted to having the answers, addicted to the idea that in case they don't have the answers, they are sure they will soon find them through this and that method - that is the paradigm of science.

This creates great problems, since this certainty entails arrogance over others - since your certainty must be more important than theirs, it must be the certain certainty. That's the same idea as personal truth being absolute truth. So where does this addiction for certainty come from?

I believe it to be of historical provenance. Through long, long years, religions have sculpted humanity, trying to put humans in the mold that they themselves created. One of the quintessential points that distinguish religions from animist and spiritual societies is the absence of the female. That is also a trait of monotheist religions, since God is mostly portrayed as a man, most likely a white one with a beard sitting on a cloud.

We have disconnected from the mother in us. From the mother that feeds and nourishes us, the mother that is our planet. We always tend to look up at the sky for answers. Sky being the invisible, the realm that is distant from us, hard to grasp. A realm that You can describe but not feel directly below your feet. This has, in many societies, been associated with the male energies, the energy of the father. That's why god is in most religions assumed to be a man.

So what happens as when we demystifiy the world, robbing it of the female qualities? We loose connection with the ever-changing phenomena of that which we can perceive, that which we can touch - the earth below, the tree, the grass, the barley... What happened, so long ago, when we became sky-gazers, searching only there for answers, losing touch with the earth?

This created yet another disconnection, and it plays into the initial ideas of this text: Disconnection from ourselves, from our incarnated self, the self that actually has and resides in a body, that body which was formed from the clay of this planet, from the physical love of mother and father. So this demystification created the lack of connection from the female, the earth, the directness of perception, but it also created the need for certainty: With no connection to Your actual perceptions, where do You put Your faith ? I believe, we have as a society put it into very ethereal ideas that are far away, a heavenly kingdom with an idealized yet anthropomorphized deity far beyond our reach.

This disconnection then created the need that that which You think to be up there to be absolutely, unequivocally unrevocably true.

And science plays right into that, paradoxically so, since it negates the existence of anything other than matter and (physical) energy - at least in traditional Newtonian science there are these two interchangeable states, and everything else was created from them, and that's that.

And that is an assumption! Which should be tested according to the methodology of science, but it is not. Everybody seems to align with the idea that matter-energy created everything else. And consciousness does not exist. But: We do not know that!

So - You can see that this addiction to certainty also plays into what happens today with the pandemic, it also plays into all the mansplaining (by both men and women, albeit much more common in men) and so many more pathologies of our society.

We can't bear the uncertainty of experiencing what is. We have to know the answers before we ask the questions. Ant that creates human interactions that are finished, dead and cold and calcified - because You don't actually allow the other to enter Your field, to perceive him or her, to be moved by them, to move them inside of You. Maybe an answer comes, maybe certainty comes, maybe it doesn't. Maybe the nature of experience is uncertainty.

If you consider how quickly things can change in Your own body, how a feeling might come and go, how an ache might come and go, You can touch this knowledge that certainty is an addiction, the futile attempt of your mind to control, to control everything inside and outside of You.

So what do we do?

Let's connect with ourselves! Our own internal experience: standing tall, from Your center in your lower belly, rising up, and then expanding upward. And if You do that - You can bear the uncertainty, You can bear the oversensitivity, You can bear the idea that Your mind or maybe your sensitivity might believe things to be like this or that. You can act with integrity.

Just throw Yourself into experience, in the now, and let go of the addiction of certainty. Be brave.

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