#very sexy of him to wear it

[tadbitfooled]

I think...I'm finally satisfied with Arzan's in game look.

[wasyago]

i imagine it's quite chilly in the black sea (for the lack of sun and color), so they're wearing slightly warmer clothes now uwu

+ thoughts

[gay-jesus-probably]

I like the general fandom trend to just take the plot of Hyrule Warriors as a loose guideline at best and just use the whole concept as a good excuse to get blorbos to interact across timelines, BUT I'm very disappointed that everyone is missing the comedic potential of a very specific squad of characters:

Young Link (aka Mask), who walks out of the nightmare of Majora's Mask and immediately gets portal kidnapped into a temporal war, takes one look at the whole mess and decides that you could not fucking pay him to admit to being the resident expert on Time Shenanigans. He introduces himself with the title of Hero of Termina, and definitely doesn't have any other ones, that would be crazy. Hero of Time? Never heard of him.

Tetra, who is a kickass pirate captain with zero patience for people trying to shove her into the Designated Princess role, and realizes immediately that Oh Fuck, this Hyrule has a lot of Ideas about how the Hero and the Princess are supposed to properly play their parts, the second they realize she's technically a Zelda they're gonna shove her in a goddamn dress and damsel her again, that's not happening. So she's definitely just a really cool pirate captain, nothing else going on here at all, definitely not the heir of the Hylian royal family in her time, that'd be crazy.

Ravio, who is literally just a palette swapped Link, meaning that the second his hood comes off, things are gonna get Awkward. There's no way in hell he's dealing with all that Hero baggage, that's Link work, so that giant bunny hood/mask is practically superglued to his head, and he's not taking it off for love or money.

Spirit Tracks Zelda, who is just in the Phantom Armour the whole time, and passing herself off as just a friendly ghost posessing a suit of armour to help the Hero of Spirits. Of course she isn't Princess Zelda, that's ridiculous, if she were a Zelda then people would start getting really weird about her technically being dead, and boy does that ever sound like a whole Thing she doesn't want to deal with, so she can't possibly be Zelda, she's just a nice ghost knight. Also, her teenage grandma is here, and that's kinda weird, so it's easier to just not admit to being royalty and avoid that awkward conversation.

Finally there's Sheik, who is not the Princess Zelda of the era straight up abandoning her war torn country for months at a time so she can risk her life in extreme cosplay for no clear reason, but is instead the actual Sheik from Ocarina of Time, who just beat Ganondorf like a month ago and is still trying to process what the fuck to do now. Also, he's been pretending to be a boy since he was ten, and is realizing there's a pretty good chance that he isn't pretending anymore, so that's a whole other can of worms. But for the last seven years of his life, being Princess Zelda meant certain death, so he's not really inclined to introduce himself like when in a new and stressful situation (not to mention he might actually just not be a girl named Zelda anymore), so he automatically introduces himself as just Sheik the spooky ninja man, and fuck he's in too deep to back out now, looks like he's committing to the bit. If you think you sense the Triforce of Wisdom on him, no you don't.

Cue shenanigans as the five of them attempt to hide that they're all actually kind of A Big Deal. The group motto is "Nobody says shit", which is usually delivered as a frantic hiss whenever someone slips up. Just the reunion between Sheik and Mask alone would be absolutely buckwild given how they parted, and how they're both frantically pretending to Not be involved with each other. For added hilarity and/or drama, Sheik gives his semi-bullshit cover story of having just been a friend of the Hero of Time, then runs into said Hero of Time and they both have to desperately pretend not to know each other, because if anyone picks up on the mountain of baggage between them then Mask is busted, and he won't hesitate to drag Sheik down with him out of sheer spite. Not to mention the weird balance of Sheik being used to this Link being a teenager that's actually a small child, and now has to adjust to Link who is a small child that's actually a teenager.

Also, i really feel like we're all missing out on the comedy potential of Ganondorf recognizing Young Link on sight and the two of them immediately launching into a grudge match with some extremely personal and specific insults on both sides. Meanwhile literally everybody else is just standing there watching, trying to process the fact that out of every single person that's been pulled out of time, Ganondorf only has personal beef with a literal nine year old.

I just feel like we're all really sleeping on the potential for Shenanigans here. The whole thing is an absurd mess, why not have some fun with it?

[roachliquid]

"Why is Cooper 'The Ghoul' Howard so absurdly smooth?" because he's the only guy in the wasteland who wears a wide-brimmed hat. everyone else is rocking those sunburns

[towl]

SAMATOKI AOHITSUGI 『 Hypnosis Mic -Division Rap Battle- 』Rhyme Anima PLUS EP.01

[lukeskqwalker]

I am not immune to cool markings

[eoinmcgonigal]

Hi!

Judge Eoin! And Paddy

Disclaimer: I am not responsible for anything said or done while thinking about Eoin McGonigal

No mortal is fit to judge such perfection.

Looks: 1000/10 Sexiness: off the charts Derangement: 10/10 he loves Paddy there's hope for us all Voice: 1000/10 Capacity for fatal levels of loyalty: 10/10 Other: +801 for gorgeous hands Total: perfection/10

If you find him hot, well, you're only human.

[brutal-nemesis]

Goretober III: Hematemesis (Written By Nemesis)

This one funny to me haha Castys so miserable he super loves the @coyotehusk goretober

←Previous - Castys Masterlist - Goretober Masterlist - Next→

Ingredients: chocolate, emeto (blood!), poison, gore, noncon touching that is a little bit more intimate than normal but still unsexy

Today’s restraint of choice was a metal collar around his neck that was chained to the floor, and Castys wasn’t really a fan. Sure, it gave him more freedom of movement than the table or dangling on a hook, but it didn’t really matter when Kuro could pin all of his limbs down and still have her hands free, which was super unfair. And the chain attached to his collar was long enough to allow him to sit up, but he couldn’t stand at all, which he supposed was better than being forced to stand and not able to sit, but still. 

Right now, though, Kuro was sitting across from him, holding out what appeared to be a piece of chocolate. “Here, Castys. You deserve a little treat for being a good boy so far.”

“You know I’m, like, way older than you, right?”

“You’d be surprised,” she laughed. And hey, maybe she was pretty old, too, considering that he didn’t even know what exactly she even was.

He kind of wanted to refuse the chocolate on principle, but he was also not one to turn down a little treat, especially if it was candy. Warily, he took it, watching Kuro as he put it in his mouth, but she just watched him right back, unreadable as ever. The chocolate was good, and it’d been a long time since he’d had something sweet, or any food at all, really, so he tried to savor it, but the longer he kept it in his mouth, the more he started to taste something…odd.

He was a fucking idiot this wasn’t just chocolate of course it was laced with something-But as soon as he tried to spit it out, Kuro pounced on him, pinning his wrists next to his head, her hand covering his mouth. “Swallow, Castys. You deserve it, remember?” Castys tried to squirm free and spit what was left of the chocolate in her face, but Kuro didn’t budge, so he was forced to chew the rest of the chocolate and swallow, since it would just melt in his mouth if he kept it there. “There you go,” Kuro said, stroking his face and causing him to flinch, which of course just made her laugh. It was always so funny to everyone how much Castys hated being touched!

Finally, she got off of him, allowing Castys to sit up and scoot as far away from her as his short chain would allow. “What the fuck was in that?”

“We’ll see, won’t we?” Castys sighed in annoyance and crossed his arms, waiting for whatever stupid drug or poison she’d fed him to take effect. He felt fine at the moment, maybe a little chest pain, but…okay, it was starting to get worse. As time went on, the pain only got sharper, and he started to get nauseous, which wasn’t really unexpected but still not fun. 

Soon enough he really, really had to puke, but Kuro was still sitting there, just staring at him, and he didn’t want to give her the satisfaction. However, his stomach didn’t give a shit about Kuro, forcing him to lurch forward on his hands and knees and vomit. It sounded more…solid than he was expecting, like there were little bits of something in it, but it was hard to tell by looking at the dark puddle between his hands.

Having a Suspicion, he wiped his mouth on the back of his hand, and…yep, that was blood. “What’d you do to me?” he groaned, feeling even worse now that he’d thrown up, like the worst heartburn ever combined with an awful stomachache.

“It’s a special poison that sort of…destroys your stomach lining,” Kuro said lightly. “So your stomach acid is digesting you from the inside right now. I want to see if it’ll get fixed when you die.”

“It won’t.” Castys gave up and laid down on the cold stone floor, already feeling nauseous again. Well, this sucked ass. The acid was gonna eat through him no matter how many times he died until it…ran out? Did acid run out? Probably. Didn’t matter right now, he was gonna puke again, and he was barely able to get upright before even more blood spewed out of his mouth, splattering all over his arms and hands. 

Kuro laughed and picked up a little red chunk of something. “Ooh, I think this is part of your stomach. Looks like little pieces of you are coming up now instead of just blood clots.” Castys didn’t have the energy to reply, just lying curled up on his side as he coughed blood out of his nose and mouth, waiting for the next delivery of corroded bits from inside himself as the world spun out of focus.

He could hardly tell when he’d died or come back to life, the pain never really went away despite him having a stomach lining again since the rogue acid was no longer in his stomach. At some point Kuro tackled him so she could wrench his shirt up and look at the fun shade of purple his stomach area had turned, poking at it with interest. He’d stopped puking now and was just stuck lying there and groaning as his insides turned into soup.

It would stop eventually.

Right?

Next→

Castys Cult: @as-a-matter-of-whump​ @blackrosesandwhump​ @fanmanga1357-blog​​ @thehopelessopus​ @just-a-whumping-racoon-with-wifi​ @hearse-song​ @muddy-swamp-bitch @whumpasaurus101 @yet-another-heathen​​ @galaxywhump​ @starnight-whump​ @his-unspoken-words​ @misspelledwitch​ @suspicious-whumping-egg​ @pumpkin-spice-whump​ @painsandconfusion​ @i-can-even-burn-salad​​ @befuddled-calico-whump​ @whumpinggrounds​ @whump-queen​ @whumpedydump​

[jimmyspades]

"You looked ridiculous in that disguise, by the way." BOSTON LEGAL 4.11 "Mad About You"

[tricoufamily]

obscure associations tag 2

tagged by @itsmariejanel <33 thank youuu maria did 2 in 1 so i'm also doing 2 in 1 these are the rules beckett green connor purple YIPPEEEEEE

ANIMAL: DOG / a snake or a cat but like. lucifer from cinderella you know

COLORS: green / purple 🤭

MONTH: july / january

SONGS: rocky mountain high by john denver, piano man by billy joel, mammas don't let your babies grow up to be cowboys by willie nelson and waylon jennings / mama by my chemical romance, you're gonna go far, kid by the offspring, ptolemaea by ethel cain

NUMBER: 12 / 4

PLANTS: dead grass with a prominent desire path going through it / venus fly trap

SMELLS: the winn-dixie from your childhood, cigarettes (he doesn't even smoke), old furniture / conditioner packet from box hair dye, jolly ranchers, jeans

GEMSTONE: agate / jet

TIME OF DAY: sunrise / 3 am

SEASON: summer / winter

PLACES: backroads, appalachia, abandoned house in the woods / gotham in the batman 2022, closed museum at night, cemetery

FOOD: southern biscuits and gravy / fish

DRINKS: MOUNTAIN DEW / black coffee

ELEMENT: air / fire

ASTROLOGICAL SIGNS: i don't think i've ever given blood sports characters birthdays. please don't make figure out the timeline in minute detail oh god there's so many of them

SEASONINGS: fuck ton of black pepper / garlic and he loves the smell mmm num num num fuck garlic smell haters

SKY: blue and cloudless / pitch black

WEATHER: punishingly hot / bad thunderstorm

MAGICAL POWER: speed / necromancy and he's using it for evil purposes he's bringing random people from the dead to do his bidding

WEAPONS: rifle / his black clip point knives

SOCIAL MEDIA: none #amish / myspace

MAKEUP PRODUCT: he'd despise the texture of all of it / black eyeliner

CANDY: grandma candies from purse / warheads

METHOD OF LONG DISTANCE TRAVEL: hours and hours in his truck with his music playing he loves it / plane

ART STYLE: regular show / arkham knight

FEAR: what comes after death / uhh nothing at all (😐)

MYTHOLOGICAL CREATURE: church grim / siren

PIECE OF STATIONARY: chewed on pencil / scissors

THREE EMOJIS: 🚜🦨🥤 / 💀🥀🔪

CELESTIAL BODY: jupiter / black hole

[pastafossa]

I’ve been wondering if Jane ever dressed up for Halloween what would her costume be?

She would 100% wear a cheesy knockoff Sexy DevilDare Horned Hero costume just to fuck with Matt.

Alternatively, I can also see Foggy absolutely making use of finally having Four People to do a Princess Bride team costume - Matt would be Wesley, obviously, both for the black outfit and because he's capable of dry snark.

But Foggy would demand to be Buttercup as the owner of the beautiful golden locks (also because he gets to shout 'YOU MOCK MY PAIN' at matt).

Karen would be Fezzik because Major Tall, and also because she's usually the one that has to metaphorically bulldoze down doors for Team Nelson and Murdock.

Jane would be Inigo because she not only relates to vengeance, but also because she'd want to try to poorly swordfight with Matt at every opportunity.

[cheekblush]

i might just fall in love with my physiotherapist..... 😳

[pardonmydelays]

A loungewear set???? Even better. 🥹😍 Too bad he (1) didn’t take the hoodie off to show off his white t-shirt and (2) put the hood on. The gold chain bracelet was a perfect addition.

i was also thinking about this t-shirt when i found the photo... would be nice to see it. & that gold chain bracelet on his wrist is doing things to me and i hate it so much 🥹

[lip-rings-and-quiffs]

Ok but in that photoshoot Lu looks a lot like fetus!luke like his face and all and IM FREAKING OUT!!!

Um yes!!!!! 100% yes!!!

Like let’s take these for example

Like look at that baby face with the most sultry poses and looks but unfortunately we’re not here to talk about that asdfghjklllkj

Now let’s take some fetus!luke pics like these

I mean just look at that!!! Now let’s put them side by side

Like I get its not like completely 100% alike and this is the same person and all that but that doesn’t stop us from talking about it lmaoo.

Like look at this cute idiot how can we not talk about him?????? Also I can’t add more pics or anything 🥲😭

[loversgothic]

like most fashion illustrators my first sketches are fucking nonsense. And that is ok

[dudefrommywesterns]

i like it so much when anthony isn't wearing his scarf because then i get to see where his shirt goes up his neck on the sides and opens down to his chest. hhhhhh