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justdaphne · 2 years

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A Christmas in the mortal world

Jude and Cardan celebrate Christmas with the Duartes

As the hooves of the ragwort steeds touch the pillowing snow, the High King and Queen of Elfhame were welcomed to the mortal world with the sound of the frosty wind swooping past them as chill ran up their spine while taking in the Christmas atmosphere with vibrant lights before them. Little children were busy playing in the snow at hours late like this, seeming to make a friend out of it, with rocks, sticks and carrots. Peculiar, thought Cardan, but he was rather intrigued. Everything was covered in snow as if it was a blanket, shielding it from the chilly weather.

Jude took Cardan’s hand and led him into Vivi’s house before he could get anymore distracted. Inside was warm, contrary to the cold outside, due to the nice, big fireplace Heather had installed.

“My, my. The King and Queen of Elfhame making a guest appearance, I see.” teased Vivi as she greeted them with a tray of freshly baked cookies with Heather beside her. The smell itself was so sweet anybody could be easily baited by it.

“I’ll be home for Christmas.” replied Jude, singsongly, which made Heather giggle.

“Don’t mind if I do.” said Cardan as he took a cookie from the tray. He seemed to have melted from the inside as he took his first bite due to its scrumptiousness, thus grabbing more greedily. Typical of him really.

“There are more batches of these cookies we’re making so don’t worry.”

“JUDE! CARDAN!” Oak yelled in his Christmas sweater, running to hug them as tight as his little arms could. Taryn and her young child followed shortly, both in matching Christmas pajamas.

“Let me show you guys the tree we built!” said Oak as he grabbed the couple’s hand, leading them to the living room.

Tree? Built?

There was a massive christmas tree in the corner of the living room as Oak had said. It was decorated with bright, colourful lights that were pleasing to the eye, giving a warm, comforting touch to this seasonal holiday. Beside the tree was the vibrantly large fireplace that kept the house from freezing to death. There were seven large red socks hanging above the fireplace, each with each person’s name written on it.

“Those are Christmas stockings which have little presents inside aside from the main presents,” explained Jude, when she saw her husband’s bemused expression.

“Can you guys help out here?” Taryn asked, shouting from across the house from the kitchen. “There seems to be a commotion..”

***

On their way to the kitchen, Jude stopped Cardan from walking any further. They were standing in a doorway and above them, a mistletoe was hung.

She tiptoed to kiss him softly on the lips. “You’re supposed to kiss someone who’s next to you if you’re under a mistletoe.” she explained, pointing to the mistletoe above them. A sly grin crept up his face.

“Well then, as High King, I will make sure to hang mistletoes everywhere in our palace back home then,” he replied, brushing her hair aside and placing it behind her ear.

“What if I’m not next to you but say, one of the advisors were?”

“Then I’ll make sure you’re tied next to me until there is no space between us.” he replied, stealing another kiss which made Jude giggle.

“Unbelievable, you are.”

***

The kitchen was a mess. Cookie dough was literally everywhere.

“What happened here?” Jude laughed.

“This is exactly why we need your help. The mixer exploded!” said Vivi with batter all over her hair. The sight caused a roar of laughter from Cardan to which Vivi replied with an eyeroll.

“Yeah whatever. Just help out.” Vivi said and tossed a mixing spoon.

The baking was quite intense since no one was speaking but only baking. Cardan would admit that he had absolutely no idea what he was doing since he grew up with servants to do everything for him and never learned how to bake. He was just mixing the dough mindlessly until Jude took over. To loosen up the intensity, Taryn got a hold on one of Heather’s speakers and a song began to play. An all too familiar bell sound started to ring and before you know it, Vivi and Heather were dramatically singing the intro for All I want for Christmas is You. Then everyone started to dance or clap along to the beat. Genuine smiles plastered on their faces and laughter filled the air, contributing to this joyous holiday.

***

They fell back against the coach, all exhausted from the baking except Oak and Taryn’s son who were watching on a tablet. The cookies were to be baked for quite a while. When it all seemed like they were finally going to get rest, the doorbell rang. A grumble came from Vivi as she begrudgingly stood up and made her way to the door to answer it. A choir of children dressed in white began to sing Silent Night - singing harmoniously and beautifully. It was like ascending to the heavens. The rest came to see the carolers too and they were all moved to tears with their wondrous performance. It amazed Cardan to witness what these children could do.

The oven rang - the cookies were finally done. They all rushed into the kitchen to smell the aroma of the baked cookies. Without much surprise, it smelled mouth-watering.

“Oak, can you bring a cookie and some carrots and place them below the fireplace?” asked Taryn as she picked up her sleepy son.

“Alright.”

“Make sure you don’t eat it!”

“Of course not! I want presents and not rocks.”

“Why would you need to put cookies and carrots below the fireplace and why would you get rocks instead of presents?” asked Cardan.

Oak laughed at his confusion. “Don’t you know about Santa?”

“Who?”

“He’s this old man who lives in the North Pole and delivers presents to kids if they’re nice and rocks to bad kids. He comes through the fireplace so the cookies are for him and the carrots for his flying reindeers!”

“But how could he know if you’ve been bad or good? They’re agazillion children in this world!”

“He just knows..duh!”

“..weird”

“You should go to bed now, Oak. If you want Santa to come.” said Vivi

“OH YEA!” He replied as he rushed up the stairs. “GOODNIGHT EVERYBODY”

“But how does -”

“He’s just a myth, Cardan. Come on, we should get some rest too.” said Jude, walking towards the stairs.

***

As usual when they visit the mortal world, Oak gives up his room so that Jude and Cardan can stay there. Before going to bed, Jude gave Cardan an early present to open up.

“Pajamas?”

“Christmas pajamas, love. I have a matching one.” Jude smiled.

“It’s lovely. Thank you.” Cardan replied.

When they both had their pajamas on, Cardan scooped Jude up in his arms before collapsing on a bed far too small for the both of them.

“So, what do you think of this holiday so far?” Jude asked with Cardan in her arms.

“Peculiar but .. I like it. I like seeing you this happy.”

She smiled “It reminds me of my childhood here before..” she sighed, “It’s a very special one and I wanna make sure I share this with you.”

She brought her mouth to his, kissing him sweetly and softly, not the intense, hungry ones they usually share, but the ones that say I love you and I’m glad you’re here with me. A kiss can say things words can’t.

“You’ve made it special for me, Jude.”

***

“ITS CHRISTMAS ITS CHRISTMAS!!”

Everyone in the house was all awakened with Oak’s excitement and wanting to open the presents he was expecting to receive. They gathered around the tree suddenly surrounded with piles of wrapped presents, all dressed in their Christmas pajamas. It must’ve snowed at night since the snow outside was nice and smooth with no footprints marking into the snow.

“Santa came!” Oak exclaimed.

“He sure did.” said Heather, to which Vivi laughed in response.

And then, the opening of presents began. It was filled with cheers and thank yous, laughter and excitement.

“So before we came here, I had this made for you.” said Cardan, somewhat nervously when he gave Jude a box nicely wrapped.

“You knew about this gift-giving part?”

“Let’s just say I wanted to be prepared.” Cardan explained while nodding to Vivi.

When Jude opened the present, she seemed to have melted, a soft smile teasing her lips. “It’s so beautiful.” She said in awe as she picked up her new dagger, made of gold and emerald crusts. A brand new one to her collection.

“This is for you.”

“Oh Jude, you shouldn’t have! But if you insist..” Jude rolled her eyes.

It was one of those mortal books. She knew they intrigued him since she caught him rereading Alice in Wonderland about a million times before so she figured to get him a new one.

“I also got you a library card so we can borrow more if you ever get bored.”

“Jude, don’t you know you’re the best wife anyone could ever ask for?” Cardan said dramatically and hugged her tightly.

“I know,” she laughed.

The Duarte household was filled with laughter and showered with love. One would be brought to tears. It was warm and cozy inside although it was snowing outside, like angels descending from the heavens to wish everyone a merry Christmas.

“Merry Christmas, Jude.”

“Merry Christmas, Cardan.”

#the folk of the air #high queen jude #jude duarte #jude greenbriar #jude x cardan #high king cardan #cardan greenbriar #cruel prince #the wicked king #high queen of elfhame #high king of elfhame #queen of nothing #holly black #jurdan #christmas

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death-and-other-myths · 2 years

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The Queen of Nothing Deadass Book Review

Okay look, this book has everything. Our main character is an unhinged monster. Her husband was raised by a cat or something. There's snakes. GOD DAMN I LOVE THIS BOOK.

This is an unhinged book review of The Queen of Nothing By Holly Black.

*SPOILERS AHEAD*

Well the 3rd and final book in this series starts out with a bang, with the prologue painting Cardan’s tragic backstory as a baby taken to meet his father by his shitty, neglectful mom. Baefin, the royal astronomer shows up and decides to ruin everyone’s day by saying, “Hey, the stars say this kid is going to topple your kingdom and you’ll never have another child after him.” — so right out of the gate, everyone hates Cardan. His siblings play with him like a puppy. His Mom is the flakiest asshole. She uses a… cat..?? As a wet nurse?? Like WOW LADY. Both CPS and PETA would like a word with you.

There’s a super sad part when Cardan is older, and Dane is messing with him. They are shooting a walnut off of a mortal’s head, who happens to be Val Moren’s lover. Val Moren was the old High King’s sineschel, and his heart was broken for the rest of his life after his boyfriend got shot with an arrow by these big dumb faerie princes.

Dane offers to switch arrows, so if Cardan messes up and hits the man, everyone will think Dane did it. Cardan says fine, but chickens out when it comes time to shoot. So Dane shoots Cardan’s arrow into the guy’s chest, and tells everyone that Cardan did it. So as punishment, they sent Asha into jail and cultivated Cardan’s reputation of being a heartless asshole. It’s just shit all around. GOD THIS POOR BABY I CAN’T BELIEVE I EVER THOUGHT HE WAS A MONSTER. HE IS THE SWEET, MESSED UP PRODUCT OF HIS AWFUL FAMILY. AUGH.

Meanwhile, in the mortal world…

Jude is watching Oak play war games with the other 5 year olds and he keeps accidentally glamoring them (so he appears invisible until he attacks). When all of his friends leave, she sneaks up on him and you know, almost chokes him out. Like sisters do!

He’s all upset with her and she’s like “I’m just trying to show you that fighting is real, and it’s serious, and it’s not a game!” and he says he never ever wants to be king, which makes this reader happy.

At night, Jude makes money by doing odd jobs for the local faeries. They apparently can live in the mortal world, usually because they’re in hiding or exile or just because they want to. She meets up with one of the Roach’s old friends, who is a goat man that gives her a job to go talk to a lady named Grima Mog and tell her to quit murdering people.

Grima Mog is part of the “Court of Teeth”, and is a warrior who was banished for one reason or another and is causing a scene in the real world. Jude goes over, tells her to cut it out, and Grima Mog challenges her to a duel on the roof. Jude wins, because she is still a savage badass. And in return, Grima Mog tells her the latest hot goss: That King Cardan is going to be overthrown before the next full moon.

Jude is like cool I don’t care about him. Yep. Totally don’t care about that loser who is also my husband. Fuck him. Ima ride the bus home covered in blood. So she does that.

And when she gets home, Heather is there trying to pluck up the courage to see Vivi again. But moreover, TARYN IS THERE in her flowy pretty dress and Jude is like “Get the fuck out.” (still covered in blood by the way).

Taryn explains that she MURDERED LOCKE. Like not even in self defense or anything. He pissed her off and slept around, so she stabbed him with a LETTER OPENER and THREW HIM IN THE OCEAN so his body washed up a few miles downshore all chewed up, and now she has to go to Faerie court and be glamored to tell the truth. So she’s asking Jude if she’ll pose as her and go in her stead.

Jude can’t really resist the opportunity to get back into Faerie land and slap her husband, so she agrees. Also Taryn drops the bomb that she’s pregnant too. So ... damn. I guess being bloodthirsty maniacs runs in this family. Like whoa.

Alright, Jude goes back to Elfhame pretending to be Taryn. She spends a brief night in Locke’s house where she finds drugs just… everywhere. Gold stuff is smeared on the couches and the servants bring her a faerie apple with dinner, which Jude finds hella weird since that stuff is like heroin to humans. She’s starting to realize Taryn isn’t as innocent as she thought. As if the whole “murdering her husband” thing wasn’t her first clue.

She walks into the courtroom and gives a curtsey, and Cardon goes “…Taryn?”

She’s like “Yes m’lord tis I, sweet lil’ innocent Taryn. Look at me all in my pretty little dress being demure and cooperative.”

Cardon smirks and is like “okaaayyyy. Begin the questioning.”

Jude is standing there thinking “Cardon you dumb fuck I’ve tricked you. You’ve played right into the palm of my hand, you treacherous scum.”

And we as the reader realize it’s pretty fucking obvious that he knows its her. And that he looks elated to see her.

He “glamours” her to only be able to tell the truth and asks her if she killed Locke. Jude says no. So Cardon turns to Nicasia and his Mom (who are also there) and is like “Welp, she didn’t do it. Guess we can all go drink and party and forget this ever happened now. Like we did when Valerian died. Remember how no one seemed to care about that?”

But Jude has to take it a step further and be like “I think the sea had something to do with it.”

Nicasia is pissed. “WHY would the sea start shit if we have a treaty with the land? Also Locke was my friend! If anyone killed him it was probably your horrifying sister. She loves murdering people. She does it like, all the time.”

Lady Asha chimes in like “It’s court gossip that Locke was fooling around with both you and your sister. Maybe she killed him to get revenge because she loved him.”

And Jude (as Taryn) says, “My sister only loves one person, and it’s not Locke.”

Cardan is unable to stifle his glee.

“And she wants that person dead.”

Cardan bristles.

Nicasia says they can’t trust anything “Taryn” says because she could be wearing a charm to resist glamour (implying Jude should strip in front of the court). But Jude can’t do that without revealing herself, since she’s all scarred up and Cardan knows every single one of those scars.

Luckily, our boy is on to this so he’s like “How about I personally inspect her for charms in my quarters. Alone. Away from here. This is totally normal, right?” And the court is like “Right!” So they’re walking to his room. And a servant runs into her with a tray, and slips her a knife and is like “Don’t worry miss Taryn. Your father is coming to save you.” And Jude is like What? Shit. What??

But then she’s alone in Cardan’s room and he is immediately like “Oh my god how are you? Did you get my letters? I wrote you every day but you never replied. Hi.”

And Jude is FLABBERGASTED “You knew it was me?!”

“From the second you walked into the room?? You’re my wife? God, you’re cute.”

She’s still pissed at him though for tricking her, which to us is very obvious to us that it was for her own protection, but Jude thinks he’s awful. She shows him the knife someone gave her and for a moment he’s like… wait… shit… is she going to stab me? She kind of likes making him think she will. But she tells him Maddock is up to something, then there’s a huge explosion. And instead of stabbing Cardan, she goes back to her warrior ways like “Stay here!” Even though he’s shouting at her not to.

Jude takes like 2 steps outside the door and gets knocked out with Faerie chloroform by some of Maddock’s knights.

She wakes up in a carriage with Oriana being carted off to Maddock’s stronghold. And everyone is like “Sorry Taryn! It was just easier to get you out of there if you were… you know… unconscious for 3 days.” (Wtf faerie people??)

So now Jude is STUCK pretending to be Taryn in Maddock’s snowy army headquarters near the Court of Teeth territory. She has to hang out and pretend to like Oriana, her prim and boring stepmother, and convince everyone she’s Taryn or Maddock will literally kill her.

During her time in camp, she meets Grimsen the master forge guy, who likes compliments and young girls (which is hella gross). She flirts with him to learn about his magic weapons and learns he’s making a crazy powerful sword for Maddock to use to take Cardan’s crown.

Jude has an awkward conversation with Maddock where he’s like “I never much cared for Jude. God she’s so annoying. You’re cool though.” He also tells her that when he saved her from the palace, half his knights got murdered in the process. He said the doors shrunk and trapped his men inside, then vines came down from the ceiling and strangled them. Only the ones running with her made it out alive and everyone else got savagely choked to death. So like… Cardan is a badass and can still control the land around him. And clearly he does not take kindly to people kidnapping his wife.

Jude decides she needs to run away before anyone catches on to her, and on her way out, she stops to inspect this cave set far away from the camp. In it, she finds THE GHOST who betrayed her like a little fucking asshole just because his buddy Dane got killed. He tells her his whole sad story. That Dane was like, his friend and ally. He even gave Dane his “true name” (which is a big real. If anyone knows a faerie’s true name, they can command them to do anything). And then somehow Locke got his true name from Dane. And was commanding Ghost to do all these terrible things. Then Locke gave him to Maddock. So Jude is like SIIGHHH God damnit okay I’m getting out of here and taking you with me. I just need to get the key from Grimsen.

She goes BACK to camp, where Oriana is waiting for her like a huge dick. And she’s all like “You’re not Taryn, are you?” But thank god she doesn’t rat her out. Jude tells her why she was masquerading as Taryn, which Oriana totally understands (everyone in their family hated Locke) and the only reason she’s here is because Maddock FAERIE CHLOROFORMED HER.

Oriana agrees to write Vivi to come get Jude if Jude agrees to leave and never fucking come back to Faerie. Jude, being a lying liar, is like “yeah! Totes!”

So Jude goes to bed and plans on waking up before dawn and stealing the key from Grimsen to grab the Ghost and run. But she gets a hand thrown over her mouth in her sleep and elbows her assailant hard. Before she can STAB THEM, the Roach is laughing his ass off like “Jude, come on. It’s us.” And I nearly screamed and fell off the treadmill when she realizes that it’s CARDAN who has his hand over her mouth.

YAYYY!!! Cardan needs more screen time. I was so sad when Jude got kidnapped like god damnit. The high king is there in regular-people clothes. No crown. No gold eyeliner. He tells her that he knew where she was because he went to visit Vivi in the human world, which Jude cannot even picture and neither than I.

She’s like “Wtf did he even WEAR?” She tries to picture him sitting on their beat up couch next to Oak’s half eaten Lucky Charms. So apparently Vivi, Taryn, AND HEATHER are waiting for them in the forest. They bullied their way into the rescue operation by refusing to tell the high king where Jude was unless they could come.

Jude, difficult as usual, is like “Neat. You can’t rescue me yet. I need to free the Ghost from his torture cave first.”

Cardan is like “Can you FOR ONCE just let someone RESCUE you without being DIFFICULT?”

She’s like “No. Help me get this key from Grimsen.”

And he says “Okay.” (Whispers: “I love you so much”)

So the Roach, Jude, and Cardan sneak into Grimsen’s forge to get the key. Jude totally doesn’t notice how good Cardan is at sneaking around, nor how good he looks in those pants.

Before they left, the Roach told Cardan he could come on the dangerous mission if he promised to leave if they got discovered. Cardan is like Oh my god FIIIINE why does everyone make me promise thiiiings. Stupid fucking promise magic.

He also made a promise to Jude that if she returned with him to Elfhame, and told him what she needs to tell him, he’ll un-exile her. So Jude is like HOT DAMN YES.

They break into the forge, get the key, and immediately trip a booby trap. Some darts fly out of the wall and Cardan instinctively protects Jude with his cloak that is basically bulletproof. They look at each other as if they’re surprised at this, because they are having a little fight where they can’t figure out who betrayed who, if at all. GOD THESE KIDS ARE SO STUPID I LOVE THEM.

Well the romantic moment gets ruined because the Roach is down with a dart. Cardan carries him and Jude is like “BRB I GOTTA TELL MY SISTERS TO LEAVE or they’ll get caught” (The knights are scrambling now in response to the alarm). Cardan, who is honor-bound to return to Elfhame is like “Fine. Fuck. Fine. Damnit.” And leaves his woman, who totally does NOT go to her sisters, but runs to the cave to get Locke. AND IN THE CAVE, SHE FINDS MADDOCK WAITING FOR HER.

She’s like “When did you figure out it was me?” and he says “Later than I would have liked.” — apparently it was the way she looked at the BOATS on the MAP in his tent that tipped him off, which is kind of a slight to Taryn more than anything lol

Jude refuses to surrender, and knowing all she has is a dagger, she runs off into the snowy woods and does a halfway decent job of defending herself, but ultimately gets stabbed in the stomach. Maddock is kind of surprised at this too, and he even seems like he’s going to spare her life until an ARROW flies out of nowhere and into his chest. Vivi, Taryn, and GRIMA MOG (not Heather) show up and threaten him. So they let him retreat back to his army.

Jude is like “Ya’ll I don’t feel so good.” And collapses, asking Taryn to stitch her side. While she’s on the ground, she remembers that she is a queen and tries to heal herself with the land… however one does that… but it totally works because it heals up enough. And when she stands up there are flowers everywhere, because that’s a fun side effect of being royal.

Maddock said he sent the Ghost after Cardan, so Jude leaves Grima Mog to protect her sisters and rushes off to the palace to stop “Garret” (his real name!) before he can kill Cardon.

She climbs up in the rafters, which is the Ghost’s favorite killing place, and is watching Cardan and everyone below when the Bomb climbs up in the rafters too, and AIMS AT JUDE. Jude realizes that Maddock tricked her, and sent her there to look like SHE is the one trying to kill Cardan. So she dodges the Bomb’s arrow and FALLS straight onto the banquet table.

There’s this cute part where Jude croaks “I lost your cloak.”

And Cardan is like “You’re a fucking filthy mortal liar.” In front of everyone, which stings. Jude thinks he believes she was trying to assassinate him too. We all know it’s cause he’s pissed she keeps putting herself in danger after promising she won’t.

The court is demanding her death, because they love dinner and a show, and Cardan says “DON’T TOUCH HER. That’s my wife.”

Jude passes out. Wakes up in Cardan’s bed with him being super sweet and tending to her. Passes out some more. Wakes up naked and gross so she takes a bath. Sees her sisters, who are super happy she is alive (I love the sisters, even stupid Taryn).

After they leave, Cardan arrives, which is sweet. Then the Bomb shows up with a medical tray, and says to him “you should leave.”

And he’s like “I’m not leaving. This is my room. And she is MY wife!”

Bomb: “I know, you keep telling EVERYONE. But I need to take our her stitches and you probably don’t want to see that.”

Jude goes “Maybe he wants to stay and watch me scream.”

And Cardan says “Maybe I do. Maybe one day you’ll do that for me.” And touches her head and LEAVES. AHHHHHH!!!!!

Jude gets her stitches out. Later, Cardan comes to fetch her because the Living Council wants to talk to her. But they take a detour to the rose garden for these two stupid idiots to work out their issues. Jude is like “I’M STILL PISSED THAT YOU EXILED ME.”

Cardan: “I wrote you letters?? Every day?? The contents of which were BEGGING YOU TO COME HOME. Also? I very explicitly said that you were banished until pardoned by the crown. You are also the crown. You could have pardoned yourself and come back any time you wanted.”

Jude slaps him lol. Smears his cute gold shit he wears around his cheekbones.

SHE IS PISSED. And again. They are so dumb. But I love them.

Cardan explains that he never thought she was capable of breaking? Or being sad? Or being defeated? In his eyes she’s like this immortal warrior demon that he wants to make love to all day. So he thought he was proposing a fun riddle for her to work out. Like Jude would show up any day now like “Hah! Good trick to make Orla think you were an ally. Let’s conquer the world, babe.” — instead Jude fell into a DEEP depression and ate fish sticks for a few months, all the while Cardan’s shitty MOM was keeping his letters from reaching her.

Jude feels embarrassed and foolish and in typical Jude fashion, does not handle this well.

She goes off on a tangent about how she’s not an immortal warrior demon, she’s SCARED all the time. Scared of this world and of powerlessness and of CARDAN. It’s a cute exchange and sweet things are said, but none of which are explicit. Will you idiots shut up and kiss already??? GAWD.

Jude goes and talks to Lady Asha who is languishing in her bed over the trauma of watching HER fall off the rafters. Jude basically hears this woman talk shit about her son who “was difficult to love” and sasses her something fierce, then leaves.

A knight comes and finds Jude and tells her that Nicasia is in the throne room with a bunch of soldiers. When Jude gets there, Cardan is holding her hand and speaking closely with her (OH SNAP) - but nothing weird is going on. They’re just friends and he’s comforting her because MADDOCK SHOT HER MOM WITH SOME KIND OF MAGIC BULLET. And she’s not dead but is in a coma. So Nicasia has to leave and make sure no one tries to unthrone her mom.

Jude puts two and two together that it was the Ghost that probably shot the sea queen. He’s out there running around being all crazy under Maddock’s control. Jude is interrupted from her council meeting by a messenger saying Taryn needs to meet with her immediately in Hallow Hall (which is weird).

So she gets up to leave but Cardan is like “I’ll come too.” and he looks at her so innocently (but also knowing this annoys her) and off they go TOGETHER in a carriage. There, they find Taryn in Balekin’s gross dungeon with the GHOST who she has trapped in a hole. He tells them it was HE who shot Orla, and we also learn the Ghost’s true name (Larkin Gorm Garrett).

The Ghost tries to kill Cardan, but Taryn uses his name to say “Hey, cut it out. You’re free of any previous orders.” and he’s just like “AUGH THANK GOD.” – Jude hands the Ghost aka Garrett over to the Bomb’s custody, and on the carriage ride back, Cardan is being adorable and asking Taryn about the human world. She tells him about slushies and gummy bears. You know, basic human stuff.

Cardan escorts the Ghost to the Bomb, but never comes to bed that night. Which makes Jude sad.

The next day, Randalin bursts in on Jude, and is like “Your dad is such a dick! And he’s being a dick because you’re the queen. Step down and make this easier on all of us.”

And Jude says “No, fuck you.”

And Cardan comes in and in the most elegant, royal way possible, drags his advisor into another room to threaten his life for insulting Jude. It’s very cute.

But Ranndal makes a good point. The lower courts are starting to assemble at the palace because word on the street is that Maddock is going to challenge Cardan to a duel for the crown, and they are either here to show their support or usher in a new king. It’s all very shaky right now.

But in true Faerie fashion, they’re like “Let’s throw a party to celebrate everyone coming into town!”

Jude wears a gold dress with like… battle-esque looking leather shoulder pads and chain-mail lookin accents. She looks like a badass, and this is made even better when Cardan gives a toast at the party that is like “Welcome everyone. To you I offer my honey and wine and to any traitors or oath breakers, I offer you my queen’s hospitality instead. The hospitality of knives.” and everyone is like hahahaha cheers (Jude included)-- meanwhile she’s sipping her cup like “Hah yes it’s true, I will murder you all without batting a eyelash.”

Heather and Vivi are also there with Oak and having a good time considering they have some stupid deal where when they go back to the human world, they’re going to break up and Vivi will erase Heather’s memory. It’s even sadder because Heather seems to be regretting it and Vivi seems to be all about it. Jude is like… when I’m done with this whole “murdering my cat dad before he can murder my king husband” thing, this is next on the list.

OKAY.

OKAY….

So like… after the party…

Jude and Cardan go back to their bedroom, and this is the cutest fucking scene. They start making out and it’s getting super steamy up in there– Cardan picks her up against the wall, and the second she shows any sort of hesitation, he’s like “Okay we don’t have to.” (So sweet) But Jude is like no no, I’m cool. One sec. And she steps into her closet to compose herself, because she hates how inexperienced she is and how he’s an expert.

So this badass bitch gets completely naked, and steps out of the closet just to see the look on his face. Then she kneels and asks if this is what he imagined she’d be like when he thought about her obsessively in Hallow Hall. He’s like um yes. Exactly this. But with more groveling.

“So what did I do?” she asks.

“I imagined you telling me to do with you whatever I liked.” - he says, kind of mortified and scared of her. Like this is such a cute vulnerable moment from him where she has his heart in the palm of her hand. And yay Jude for discovering her sexy self, which like every other personality trait of hers, is also terrifying. Cardan’s into it though. And they have very sexy sex on the floor, which is fucking adorable and sweet and I love it so much, and I also know this means something TERRIBLE is about to happen.

(This was in Chapter 21 by the way!)

In Chapter 22, Maddock finally shows up. He wants to come parlay as per traditional fru fru tradition. The Bomb is like “How about this? How about I shoot him with an arrow?” and Cardan’s like “Nah, I’m not a coward. But I’m not going to duel him either.” – So everyone is just hanging out gathering for this like spectators. Even Vivi, Heather, and Oak who REALLY shouldn’t be there and I’m surprised everyone is okay with this. While they’re getting ready to have the parlay, Jude and Cardan have a little moment.

Before they go out there, Cardan comes out and says that he LOVES HER, and walks away all cool before she can reply, which drives her nuts. Jude realizes she’s loved him for a long time. She loved him before they got married. AUGH so SWEET.

Maddock comes in there like “Duel me. Lookit my big sword made by this master smith. I’ll even let you use it.”

Cardan’s like “I’m not going to fucking duel you, dude. And you better put that fucking sword down in my throne room, kay thanks.”

“Want me to put it down? Okay.” And he DRIVES the sword into the ground, which causes an earthquake so strong it makes the throne cut in half. Like this hundnreddsss year old throne that Cardan’s family has been protecting for generations, just destroyed. God Maddock is an ASSHAT.

Then Maddock starts spewing his shit like “Do you think your people actually care about you? Like your stupid murdered family ever cared about you? The only reason you accepted the crown was because you so desperately wanted to be accepted by your family. Your subjects don’t even like you. My army is super loyal. You suck. DUEL ME OR I KILL THE SEA QUEEN with my magic bullet that moves if I tell it to.”

Cardan has this interesting introspective moment and says “A king is not his crown. You’re right that loyalty or love shouldn’t be forced. But Elfhame shouldn’t be won or lost on a wager, either. You fuckin weird bloodthirsty old man.”

Cardan CRACKS THE BLOOD CROWN IN HALF and is like “The people shouldn’t swear loyalty to a crown. They should support the king they want to support. Your choice is your own.”

And boom, democracy is born in Elfhaim.

The folk are bowing their heads and nodding, totally on board the Cardan train. But then Grimsen interrupts everything by FREAKING OUT about his precious crown and how upset he is that it’s broken.

Jude remembers that everything Grimsen makes is cursed, just as Cardan’s eyes turn black, and the roses over the throne turn black, and his eyes start fucking BLEEDING BLACK and before she knows it, her adoring husband from the night before TURNS INTO A GIANT FUCKING BLACK SNAKE!!!!! *Pterodactyl scream* NNOOOOOOOO!!!!!

Grimsen says “It will poison the land. No true love’s kiss will stop it. No riddle will fix it. Only death.”

Maddock jumps on the opportunity and wants to kill the snake. Jude is like the FUCK you will. Her army seizes Maddock and his little posse. Snake Cardan bites and kills Grimsen, which kind of solidifies that his brain isn’t in there, because Cardan is very much against murdering people. It’s just pure chaos up in the throne room. There’s a cute part where Oak tries to save his mother with a little toy sword. Everyone runs away and the snake gets stabbed a little by Maddock but is okay, and it curls around the throne as Jude is dragged out the room.

Babygirl has herself a much-deserved panic attack. Grima Mog is like “Get a hold of yourself” and Jude says “I fucking will. I’m going to stand up. I’m going to be okay in a minute.” Grima is like “I know you will be.”

I like Grima Mog. I like her even though she’s like a bloodthirsty cannibal. What is it with this book and making me really like murderers?????

Alright so Jude immediately swings into badass bitch mode. Calls the Bomb. Tells her to go get intel on who out there is plotting her assassination and who is vying for the crown. She says not to ask questions. Murder anyone who looks like they’re trying to murder her. The Bomb is like yep. Roger that. Calls her sister in. Tells Taryn she’s good at decorating things (like Locke’s house of debauchery). Asks her to make up a room to act as a throne room where she can talk to people and be scary and intimidating. Taryn is like yep. On it. She tells Grima Mog she is the new army general, because she doesn’t like the guy Cardan chose.

Jude gets all set up in her makeshift throne room since the real one is currently being guarded by a huge fucking snake. She sees the Living Council in there and starts planning on what to do about Maddock and his stupid fucking army and all of the courts that are currently splintering off trying to figure out who to be loyal to. She calls in Baphen and tells him to consult the stars for a way to cure Cardan. The Living Council is like “we should just kill the snake” and Jude is like “We’re not fucking killing the snake. Focus on Maddock.” So they talk that out and rally the troops.

Eventually the snake gets out lol it gets through the crack in the floor, and then runs around the land for a little bit doing snake stuff.

Wherever it touches rots and turns black. And people have gotten it in their heads that whoever slays the snake gets to be king, so it keeps getting attacked and killing indiscriminately. But eventually, it comes BACK because apparently the throne room is its den now. It curls around the broken throne and it’s snowing in there. The weather outside is also nuts and thunderstormy and hailing.

After her meeting, Jude enters the throne room and tries her hand at talking to the snake. She tries to see if there’s any recognition in its golden eyes, but there doesn’t seem to be. She tries to call on the land to heal him, but nothing happens. There’s a sweet part where she says out loud “Take my crown. Take my power. Take whatever you need, just heal him. Please.” — and even though the land or magic doesn’t answer her, I hope somewhere in there, Cardan heard her.

Okay so the prophecy said… that if Cardan ever came into the crown, the throne and the crown would be destroyed. But the prophecy also said that only if his blood is spilled, would a truly perfect leader emerge. I THINK this means that Jude is eventually going to have to slay the snake.

Jude hangs out in the snowy throne room with the snake for like HOURS until the Bomb comes. The snake has gotten used to Jude’s presence and doesn’t seem to want to attack her, so that’s something. It’s still impossible to tell if Cardan is in there though. I mean it doesn’t react to his name.

Anyway the Bomb says “Hi. I killed a ton of people that were plotting against you. You wanna come out of the snake room now?” And Jude says “Okay.” Just as Grima Mog comes back with word that Maddock wants to talk.

So they move her whole complicated throne set up outside because Jude is livid and doesn’t want these people anywhere near her fucking home and her cursed husband. I don’t know if I mentioned it earlier, but the people from the Court of Teeth are weird. They’re like ice faeries and they have this little girl who is their queen, but she’s just a puppet for her parents who keep her on a literal bridle. When they get there, the bridle is gone, but her skin is all scarred from where it was. And she’s in these horrible chains that look just as painful. Maddock shows up with that lovely family and isn’t wearing any armor.

He’s like “Hey. I never wanted to kill you. I actually quite like you. You wanna strike a deal? I’ll give you this bridle so you can control your snake husband. It was made by Grimsen and gives you complete control over whoever you want to restrain. That way you can remain queen and make sure your snake stops running around rotting the earth and killing anyone who tries to pierce its apparently impervious scales.”

Jude is like “You threw a bunch of men at it and figured out it’s unstoppable, didn’t you? What are you up to?”

“Make Oak marry this tiny icy abused child and you get the bridle.” Maddock says.

AND TO MY SHOCK AND HORROR, Jude is like “Okay.” — well she agrees to accepting the bridle on the terms that the war should be put on hold and it’s better for everyone if there isn’t a deadly toxic snake running around.

She doesn’t agree to the marriage. She agrees to have a bridling… event? Where she is going to attempt to bridle the snake, and if she wins then yay. If she fails and it kills her, then the armies are all gathered and can duke it out. She thinks Maddock is trying to rule through her the way she ruled through Cardan. Oh gosh I hope she’s up to something and not actually considering putting that thing on the snake. That night, she throws a wadded up paper into the ocean that says “If you ever loved him, help me.”

Jude and the Bomb have a sweet convo and Jude goes to try to help the Roach, who is still poisoned. When Jude sees him, she’s horrified to find that he’s not just sleeping, he’s having like… nightmares. She tries to heal him, but the earth magic won’t come. The Ghost, who is part of the gang again (yay!) tells her not to force it, just let it come. AND IT DOES! The roach is back and confesses his love to the Bomb and it’s fucking adorable.

Jude takes the bridle to that old hag lady that once tried to trick Cardan into marrying her daughter. Now she’s good I guess haha. The hag tells her that if she followed the instructions Lord Nell or whatever his name is gave her, and tied her hair around the bridle, then she would have been bound to the snake as well. Basically, it was a trick that would have trapped both Jude and snake Cardan into servitude. Thank god she found this out.

Jude also visits Heather in the library who is researching snake-themed faerie tales looking for a clue. Heather tells her that she struck a deal with Vivi that when they go back to the human world, her memories will be erased. But Vivi will have to meet her again and win back her love. But do it properly this time and be honest about the faerie shit from the get-go. And if Heather falls in love with her despite that, she’ll get all her memories back. That’s super freaking sweet I love them.

There’s like a banquet before the snake bridling.

And Jude is doing her best to be a badass queen and make speeches, but she’s so nervous. She gets through it though. Her and Nicasia have this super sweet moment (after Kaye, Roiben’s lady punches her) where Nicasia is like “I know you’re a bloodthirsty monster who is only using Cardan for his power, but please save him. I beg of you.”

And Jude actually CRIES with her and says “Tell me the riddle I must solve. Tell me what to slay. What to sacrifice. And it’s done. I’ll do anything to free him. I promise you.” And they just stand there, two enemies, crying together and realizing how much they love this poor cursed snake boi.

Taryn and Vivi find a chest with some badass silver armor made for a woman, so Jude wears that to the big “snake bridling event” that is happening out in the woods somewhere.

The snake is out. Doing it’s thing. Turning the land to shit. The armies are gathered on either side, and everyone is watching Jude and waiting to see what happens. Will she bridle the snake or will she be eaten? It’s growing bigger too, so by now, it could swallow a car.

Jude has some internal monologue… where she actually wonders if bridling him is the right thing to do. She has no idea how to break the curse. This way, Cardan wouldn’t have to die. He’d be trapped as a poisonous snake forever, but at least he’d be by her side. But she also remembers what Cardan said before he got cursed. That no one should be forced to swear their love or allegiance. That’s the kind of thing you should decide for yourself. And she remembers that Cardan said something along the lines of “I was on my way to becoming Balekin. Becoming a monster. If I ever go down that path again, I want it to be you that ends me.” — SO SHE CUTS OFF THE SNAKE’S HEAD.

HE DEAD. There is blood EVERYWHERE.

And the second she does this, fighting breaks out. It’s just a bloodbath all around while Jude is in shock. Maddock’s army gets defeated because Nicasia shows up with the sea. But instead of trying to kill Jude, Maddock comes to help her up.

He tells her “You’ve already won. Look.” And turns her around to the snake where a bright golden light has emerged. And out of it steps naked-ass Cardan covered in blood and looking regal as hell.

“Only when his blood is shed will a great ruler emerge”

BOOM. He calls for the fighting to end and Jude runs and hugs him. They hang on to each other and it’s so sweet. THE BEST REUNION.

Someone literally is like “Welcome back, King! Here, you want this cloak?”

And Cardan goes “Nah. I haven’t worn clothes in days.”

And literally rides buck ass naked in the carriage, covered in blood. HAH. Like. Yeah nudity is a thing in Faerie world but alrighty. Here we go. Cardan is back and he’s not messing around.

Everybody gets a bath. The general mood is SO HAPPY and celebratory. There’s a big ole banquet where Cardan and Jude slip away to the pretty glowing mushroom room behind the throne (which he fixed with his magic and split into 2 chairs). They finally have a moment alone, and Jude blurts out “I love you.”

He’s like “You don’t have to say that out of pity.” — which breaks my heart. That he STILL thinks she hates him so much that she seriously never will love him. And he’s CONTENT with just being with her even if it’s just for power.

But Jude launches into this awesome, fumbling speech about how she liked him ever since they went out together during the revelrie, and he helped her learn about each court and how to win them over. She says being around him is fun. And walks through their whole history together to help him understand that despite her being a cold, unfeeling monster, she loves him to pieces.

And they kiss. And it’s fucking adorable.

Jude also asks him what it was like being a snake and he says it was hella weird. He definitely had an animal brain. And was filled with fear and strife and a feral instinct to kill indiscriminately. But he says, he knew Jude. That’s why he was calm when she came and sat with him. He always knew her. (Awww!!!)

The next day they have a formal coronation. Apparently 2 people have never ruled together. It’s always a king or queen who has a bunch of consorts. But they get the ceremony where the court gets asked if they accept their king and queen, and everyone says yes because Cardan is awesome and Jude is scary. But they like scary. Then they get to give out BOONS to all of the people that were loyal or traitorous.

Grima Mog gets to keep the earth-shattering sword and continue to be general. Taryn gets cleared of all charges even though she totally fucking murdered her husband. The ice princess with the bridle scars gets freed and her parents get put in her custody. And she gives a creepy shark-toothed grin that makes Jude think maybe her parents were keeping her in chains for a reason. But that’s their problem!

Maddock gets brought in and Jude sentences him to live in the mortal world for the rest of his days, and to forget the name he knows (she’s talking about the Ghost’s name). I like that her and Maddock totally come to this agreement. He’s like “Yeah, okay I lost. You’re absolutely a badass. I hate losing but I’m also pretty proud”. I think he was really sad when he thought he killed her. So this is a better punishment than getting executed for sure. Oriana decides to go with him and Oak is excited because he loves the mortal world and now his parents are going to live there too. YAY!

I love how this book ends. It ends with Jude and Cardan flying home with Vivi and Oak to the real world. And they find Cardan some normal clothes (a tshirt over his black pants) and they have a cute little party at Vivi’s apartment.

Heather is there and puts up a sign that is like “Congrats Newlyweds!” And says “Vivi has told me some wild things about ya’ll!” Jude just hugs her. They also got them a cake with little gummy snakes sprinkled on it. And Oak takes them to pick up pizza.

Heather also got everyone paper crowns, and there’s this cute part where Cardan tilts his paper crown at an angle, like he used to wear the Blood Crown and it makes Jude laugh. The book ends with them toasting to a new future, and pizza, and friends, and Cardan says “To scheming great schemes.”

I love that this is where we leave them. In casual real world clothes wearing paper crowns and eating gummy snakes.

Boy, I loved this book. I love the world building. I love the slow burn romance. The sexy times. I love that Holly Black makes me like and cheer for this cold hard bitch Jude. I love that Cardan, who at one time was SO NOT LIKEABLE it was CRAZY became one of my favorite characters in fiction.

I loved when that heel turn happened, when he was a prisoner of the spies, and was so cute and charming. We all fell in love with him at the same time Jude did.

Then we spent 2 books watching Jude be a complete idiot and be the last one in the world to realize how much he loved her. And how much she loved him. She loved him more than power, which was her single solitary goal this whole time.

This mortal girl overtook a bunch of magical immortals and it was completely believable and fun and baffling. Damn I can see why Holly Black is so highly regarded. That was SO GOOD. I am going to need a few days to digest this.

I just keep thinking of them all happy and celebrating together over pizza and paper crowns. EEEEE!!!

Deadass Rating: 9.5/10

#cruel prince #jude x cardan #queen of nothing #folk of the air #cardan greenbriar #books & libraries #currently reading #fiction #literature #writers #the wicked king #holly black #jurdan #deadass book reviews #book reviews #book recommendations

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cruelprincae · 6 months

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@lcfthaunted liked the sc for older! Cardan

Although he has never had the patience to dedicate time to study all the progress that humanity has made over the passage of the years, merely content with the fundamental information that is the existence of tremendous skyscrapers, internet, pizza and cars ― all of which being Vivi's input on the few occasions that he has come to visit the apartment herself and Heather inhabit ―, Cardan is quite familiar with the concept of coffee shops, for they have been there on the occasion that he visited the mortal land when he was significantly younger, and he would return the ensorceled mortals to their families and homes, away from his brother's influence.

On the rare occasion when his moth would twinkle its antennas in a silent demand of wanting for something other than the six-pack bottle of beer it was accustomed to, to make the journey back to Elfhame, he would visit one of these shops and he would glamour himself a handful of caffeinated beverages; one for himself, and several for the gigantic moth he would often park behind the establishment, hidden away from prying eyes, which he would then pour inside of a bucket for it to drink from. Even if the taste was foul and did little more other than insult his taste buds, it would appear that the moth quite fancied it, as it took its sweet time devouring all the liquid it could find as well as licking all traces of it from the bucket's walls. The Prince knew little of its use, but what he did know ― most of it being from observing the moth's behaviour, which stood on high alert for days on an end after consuming the caffeinated beverage ― is that, upon its consumption, it offers clarity, focus and liberation from the heavy feelings of tiredness that would occasionally wash over him.

Mab, he can use some clarity right about now, particularly since the heir to his throne thought it would be rather fitting to make himself a prisoner of the now-dispatched Court of Teeth, all to impress its teenage Queen. Cardan is no stranger to rough declarations of affection ― in fact, majority of the romances in his life were of such nature ― and, were the circumstances any different, he would have sat back and allowed the youth to work on their problems; alas, Oak's ill judgement made for a fairly ancient enemy of the Crown to threaten the integrity of both the himself and the Court that he has tried to built for the better part of the decade. Interference is, at this point, inevitable.

Alas, he knows not how to move. Both Jude and his General, Grima Mog, opt for a direct attack against the Court of Teeth in sight of such deliberate disrespect, which would most likely result in the uproar of war ― in fact, it would appear that the majority of his court thirsts for the taste of battle after nearly a decade of tranquillity. And, though Cardan is a pacifist, with battle almost always as a last resort, he knows not how to talk his way out of this predicament. Clarity and ideas are what he beseeches, and hence, the reason why he is seated in a particularly crowded coffee shop, with the chatter of mortals like the irksome buzzing of sprites flying above his head.

❛ I wish for a coffee, ❜ He merely says at the girl that comes forth upon his table and pushes forth a green leaf, glamoured to resemble that of mortal money, with two ring-adorned fingers. Then, there is a moment of a silence as his black hues glance upon the catalogue of delicacies in a considerate frown, and he adds; ❛ I also wish for dumplings. ❜

#lcfthaunted #( 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐝𝐢𝐝𝐧'𝐭 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐲 𝐈 𝐭𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐨𝐟 𝐚 𝐜𝐫𝐮𝐞𝐥 𝐛𝐨𝐲 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐚 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐧𝐞 ┊ main )#( this was long i'm so sorry sjhfk

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elvinapandra · 3 years

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JURDAN BABY :

Its kinda complicated, like Jude gives a boy mom vibes while Cardan seems like he's gonna be a dad to girls

Anyways let's just go with a boy

Jude seems likely to have the baby in Elfhame but since I find her very unpredictable she might give birth in the mortal world

If you think our High Queen's gonna scream in labor, you are wrong

Because its Cardan's the one who is screaming

As soon as the baby cries Cardan cries too but won't let anyone see it

The entire elfhame celebrates the welcoming of the little prince

With parties that goes on for days

Jude's kinda awkward with the new born at first but Taryn, the bomb, Vivienne, Heather are there to help.

But as soon the time passes by She eventually warms up to her son

Oak will be the happiest to have a cousin

Basically a mini version of Cardan in terms of appearance.

He has Dada's tail which he adores

A total momma boy in matters of closeness

Follows Jude literal everywhere(even in the washroom and she has to kick him out)

Knows all of her secrets

Sit beside her when she is working

Loves it when Jude holds him on her hips

Also really enjoys seeing her training

But sits on his dada's lap when he's sitting on the throne

Cardan would spoil him rotten. He names it he gets it.

Would start playing with him during meetings, much to the annoyance of the council members

Always gives a kiss to both his parents before sleeping

Doesn't let children of the courtiers touch him tho

Only plays with Taryn's child and Oak of course

Favorite aunt is Vivi, because she spins him around in her arms(but many times drop him giving Jude a heart attack which she doesn't shows)

Glows with joy when his parents are going for trip to mortal land

Makes drawings with Oak in mortal lands

High king of mischief, plays prank on anyone he wants on to especially on the bomb and the roach.

Wears Cardan's crown.

Him : I want a sibling

Cardan : of course-

Jude : NO

When grows older, Jude tries to train him but fails.

Just like Oak, doesn't wants to become high king.

That's it for now. Request if you want more like this❤

#the cruel prince #folk of the air #jurdan #jude duarte #high king cardan #cardan greenbriar #jude x cardan #high king of elfhame #jurdan baby #cardans tail #i love cardan #the wicked king #queen of nothing #jude and cardan #holly black #we all need to write more fics like this #high queen of elfhame #high queen jude

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books-and-draws-eclectic · 2 years

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(The Stolen Heir x Heartstopper)

Oak: *in trouble*

Jude, Taryn, Vivi, Heather: *appear instantly*

Oak: Damn, how do you just appear out of nowhere?!

Jude, Taryn, Vivi, Heather: *shrugs* Older sister magic 💫

#yes Heather is his sister too #the stolen heir #heartstopper #oak greenbriar #charlie spring #jude duarte #taryn duarte #vivienne duarte #heather #tori spring #holly black #suren #older sister magic

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snusbandxknifewife · 3 years

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stickyfickystickyfickystickyfickystickyfickysti

What is this? Lex writing something after a literal fucking year? It’s more likely than you think.

Sticky ficky 10 (yea boiiiiiis)

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Weeks had passed, time moving a little less slowly now that Jude and Heather were spending time with one another. She discussed her difficulties adjusting to the mortal world, Heather aired her confusion about Faerie, and they both staunchly ignored discussing their respective ex-partners. It was a happy, almost easygoing friendship; something Jude never thought she’d get to experience.

It was because of this that Jude had started to come out of her little hobbit hole of a depression cave and it was because of this that she started to frequent the local kite shop that Heather loved so much.

It was because of this that Vivi knew where to call when an emergency came up.

“Is he alright?” Jude asked, all but yelling into the kite store phone and her mind going frantic as Vivi told her that Oak needed to be picked up from school.

“From what the principal said, he doesn’t feel well, but I haven’t gotten much in the way of information,” her older sister sighed. “I’m out of town today so I can’t go get him. You’re on the pickup list. Everything should be ok.”

Jude nodded. She had a vague recollection of how to get to Oak’s school, having been there already for one play that his grade put on. She knew how to get there and—as long as the bus wasn’t late—it shouldn’t take her very long.

“Yeah I can get him. I’ll head that way now.”

She didn’t waste time waiting for her sisters response; she simply hung up the phone as wished Josh—the store’s middle-aged father figure of a cashier—a good afternoon on her way out.

The trip to the school was quiet and uneventful, exactly how she liked things and also exactly how she didn’t. It’s nice not to have to deal with attackers jumping out of dark corners to ambush you at every turn, but a lifetime of being raised to search for them leaves her antsy when they don’t appear. By the time she made it to the school, her hackles were up and her teeth were gnashing.

“I’m here for Oak Duarte,” she told the unassuming secretary, shoving her hands into her coat pocket and searching the office for her brother. “I’m his sister, Jude.”

“Can I have some form of ID?” The woman’s fake-chipper voice put Jude even more on edge, especially considering she had no form of ID. Missing important documents like your birth certificate and social security card tended to get in the way of shit like that.

But, thankfully, before she had the time to say anything, a door swung open and Oak came bounding out.

“Jude!”

“Hey, Oakling,” she accepted his hug with a gentle pat of his shoulders before nodding to the secretary. “This fine woman wants to see my ID.”

Understanding the assignment immediately, Oak turned and glamoured one of the secretary’s business cards into a fake license and Jude was in.

They were out the door and halfway to the bus stop, Oak excitedly pulling her the whole time, before Jude remembered exactly why she was there.

“I thought you were supposed to be feeling poorly,” she observed, one eyebrow cocked as her brother skidded to a halt, looking like a cat caught mid-air as he aimed for the family parrot. “What happened to that?”

He looked around him for a way out, only to half-heartedly cough into his arm.

Jude couldn’t help but snort. “Look, I know faeries can’t lie, but you’ll need to get better at faking it before you go back to Elfhame. That was pitiful.”

“What can I say? I feel much better now that I’m not in school.”

“Nice try, acorn,” Jude caught him as he turned to make for the bus stop once more, pulling him back to face her. “What’s in school that’s making you feel worse than out here?”

“Well math is rather boring,” Oak tried.

She rolled her eyes. “I don’t play games, Oak. I want the truth and I want it now.”

He sighed, clearly giving in, before motioning that he’d like to sit on the bench at the bus stop.

Jude watched her little brother as they walked, saw how he hunched into himself and frowned as he worried over whatever was bothering him, and it hurt her heart. Clearly, he was struggling with something, and it angered her that he’d likely been dealing with it while she was off in her own head, too preoccupied with herself to help her baby brother when he needed it.

They sat down and she turned her full attention to him as he played with his hands.

“The kids at school are mean to me,” he finally admitted.

“What happened?” Jude instantly zeroed in. “Did they try to drown you in the pond by the playground?”

“No.”

“Did they poison you?”

“What? No!”

She searched her memory for another possible option. “Did they make you strip naked while your teacher did nothing?”

“You know your experiences aren’t universal, Jude,” he crossed his arms. “Mortal school has, like, conflicts of identity, not literal murder attempts.”

“Fair,” she nodded, remembering why they sent him to the mortal world in the first place. “Please, continue.”

His righteous indignation was almost immediately replaced by that quiet concern of moments before as he looked to the ground. “They say I’m weird.”

“Weird? How?” Jude gently probed, doing everything in her power to avoid mentioning that, technically, her fae brother was strange by human standards.

“When we’re playing at recess,” he continued, “they always separate into boys and girls. I don’t know how to play the sports the boys enjoy and when I went with the girls I got teased.”

She frowned, reaching back into her memory for her time in mortal school, back when the biggest threat to her life was a missing cooties shot.

“I remember having boy and girl friends when I was in school. Surely they aren’t all strict about this self-imposed gender segregation.”

He huffed angrily, throwing down his arms like she just wasn’t understanding. “That’s the problem! After a few days, when I finally got the girls to trust me, it all got worse! I can’t play like them.”

For just a moment, her heart soared at the idea that this was the struggle her brother was facing. Schoolyard teasing was nothing compared to violent bloodshed and upheaval.

But then she saw his face, saw how his eyes glistened with unshed tears, and she cursed herself for even feeling a moment of relief. He’d been right, her experiences weren’t universal, and she was wrong to judge his pains by her tolerance.

“Oh, acorn,” she pulled him into her side. “What do you mean?”

“They spend all of recess galavanting about, spinning tales about how I’m a princess in a castle of ice or I’m a sorcerer who can speak to animals,” his voice was muffled by her light jacket, but she could still hear the thickness in the back of his throat. “And I’m not allowed to tell them of Elfhame, so I can’t join in! I can’t dance the day away on falsehoods like they can, so they don’t want me around.”

Something deep and personal in her chest broke as she held her brother. Looking down at him, at his golden curls and his little horns and those sharpened ears that she’d currently despise seeing on almost anyone else; she was hit by the realization that he was much a stranger in a strange land, just as she’d once been.

He looked up at her, likely drawn by her silence, and scrunched up his face as he wiped his eyes. “I’m not sure what there is to smile about at this moment, my life is in shambles!”

“I’m merely proud, Oakling,” she said, attempting to pacify him. “Proud that you did not simply glamour the problem away the second it popped up.”

“I don’t see how glamouring myself a friend would help here. What good is a friend that you essentially have to create by yourself?”

That caused her to pause as the bus arrived.

“Acorn,” she asked as they got on, glad they were the only passengers. “Did you not have an imaginary friend when you were younger?”

He spun on her, looking something between puzzled and offended. “Whatever do you mean?”

“An imaginary friend,” she continued. “Someone that you talked to and played with when you were alone. Did you not ever make up an imaginary friend?”

“Who would do that?” He scrunched his nose up, looking, for just a moment, every bit the spoiled royal that his blood unfortunately made him.

“I did, Taryn did.” Jude tilted her head and studied him closely. “We’d tell lavish tales of their backgrounds when we played, making up everything along the way.”

“I can’t do that!” He sounded more frustrated than I’d ever heard him. “That’s the problem! I can’t tell the story of something that isn’t real.”

He spun, arms crossed once more as he glared out the window.

“They were real to me.”

She said it softly, more soft than possibly anything she’d ever said to him before, and she thought that he hadn’t heard her.

Until his head turned just a sliver, and she knew he was listening.

“I once asked Vivi why faeries could tell stories, even when they weren’t reading them off a page, and she told me that there were lessons in stories, and those lessons were enough of a truth for a faerie to be able to speak it,” Jude kept talking, looking ahead to give her brother the room to study her if he wished. “I suppose I liked the idea of that, because it made the fae and humans seem just a little more similar.”

She let the silence hang, waiting for him to take the bait.

“How?”

Hiding a smile, she went on. “Humans find truths in stories too, that’s why your classmates are so passionate about pretend. The sorcerer who can speak to animals? That likely comes from a love for her pet that’s so strong would give anything to be able to understand what it said. The princesses? Little girls who are learning to harness a power that within that they aren’t sure they understand yet. She wants to speak out and to lead and to be heard, so she is a princess because a princess does all of those things.”

She turned back to him, watching him from the corner of her eye as he pondered her words.

Then, as the bud stopped, she stood.

“Where are we going?” Oak rushed to grab his school bag and follow her.

“To the toy store, we’re making imaginary friends.”

She gave no other information as she led her brother into the tiny toy shop by the grocery store, even though he did his best to quiz her into submission. No, it wasn’t until they stood in front of a wall of stuffed animals that she spoke again.

“Choose something, a base, and I shall teach you how to play pretend.”

He frowned at her, then at the wall, and then back at her. “This is absurd.”

“I said the same thing about learning the language of birds when I came to Elfhame,” she laughed. “If you wish to survive in a strange place, you must be willing to unlearn your concept of absurdity.”

And she moved deeper into the toy store, studying dolls that she remembered from her childhood and electronic knickknacks that she’d never be able to work properly.

Oak followed behind aimlessly.

She was starting to think that she’d have to choose for him, to give him that extra little push he needed, when her eyes landed on something that made her gasp.

“Oh my god, I remember these stupid things!” Jude couldn’t help but laugh as she moved forward with the kind of speed that only a former spy could manage.

When she spun the package around, Oak made a face.

“Worm on a string?” He sounded more confused than before. “What is that supposed to do?”

“It’s this dumb little toy that you were supposed to be able to make look like it moved on its own,” she looked back to it. “I could never make them work. Vivi could, but I think it was glamour.”

Oak stepped forward, grabbing a package containing an orange worm. “So it’s just a fake worm and,” he squinted his eyes, “fishing line?”

“And googly eyes!” Jude nodded enthusiastically, gesturing to her blue worm like Vana White. “The height of early-twenty-first-century entertainment.”

“This is so stupid.” He shook his head.

But didn’t put the worm back.

“It’s so stupid,” Jude probed, “and you want it anyway.”

He scowled at her. “If you insist on this foolish imaginary friend agenda, I suppose a worm is a non-offensive start.”

Jude grabbed the orange worm and headed to the counter, letting Oak cross his arms and continue to act like this was all beneath him.

Once they made it home, she tore open the two packages and sat on the floor in front of the coffee table, already fussing with the tiny cardboard card that you were supposed to hide in your waistband and failing to make the worm move in what she considered to be a natural method.

Her brother watched from the edge of the living room, still clinging to the idea that this was dumb.

“Come on, acorn,” she shook the little orange worm at him. “Your friend is waiting for a name.”

“A worm doesn’t need a name.” But still he relented, walking over and sitting by her.

“Nonsense!” Jude exclaimed, brandishing her blue worm at him. “See? I’ll prove it. This is Fweej, they’re an alien from a different planet, set on conquering the world and bathing in the blood of their enemies.”

“But it’s literally not.”

“Oh, Oakling,” she sighed at him. “I’m going to need you to work with me here. The worm is your imaginary friend, you get to decide everything about it.”

He rolled his eyes, but looked to the orange worm all the same. “Fine. Can I just name it Orange?”

“Oak, that would be like if Oriana had named you Blond,” Jude fixed him with a tired glare. “Don’t you think your friend deserves a fancier name?”

“But oranges are called oranges and nobody’s ever had a problem with it!”

“I thought oranges were actually green and they changed it to make them look more appealing?” She looked back to Fweej, pulling him across the tabletop.

“Wait, what?”

“Not important,” she waved him off. “Name the worm, acorn.”

He frowned at her again before glaring at the worm once more.

“Clementine.” He finally announced.

Jude smiled at the little win, pulling Fweej over to her brother.

“Why hello, Clementine,” she said grandly, moving Fweej for emphasis. “I am Fweej, and I am so pleased to make your acquaintance. Would you like to be friends?”

Silence descended, and she fought the urge to look over and nudge her brother.

Then, finally…

“Hello, Fweej,” Oak started, his voice quiet and unsure. “I would love a friend.”

~~~~~~~

The rise of FweejTM

Lmao sorry I literally went MIA for like 10 months college has me seconds away from grippy socks jail 🤪

Also before anyone is like “but the nerf war was oak playing pretend!” No my friends that was Real and our favorite ten year old was literally ready to commit both murder AND treason

Tag list: @cardan-greenbriar-tcp @hizqueen4life @slightlyrebelliouswriter23 @thewickedkings @aelin-queen-of-terrasen @cheekycheekycheeks @queen-of-glass @b00kworm @doingmyrainbow @andromeddea @jurdanhell @thesirenwashere @illyrianwitchling @courtofjurdan @clockworkgraystairs @st00pid231 @booksandlewks @fateandluminary @addies-invisible-life @nahthanks @dirigibleddinosaur

If anyone else wants to be tagged in the dumb, let me know. Also @jurdanhell the platonic love of my life is helping me with a list of links to each of my fics so y’all don’t have to keep scrolling.

#tfota #jurdan #jude duarte #Cardan greenbrier #tfota au #sticky ficky #the rise of Fweej #tyrannosaurus lex writes #tyrannosaurus lex answers #y’all thought I was dead didn’t you haHA

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ink-on-dead-trees-simp · 3 years

Text

Jurdan Halloween Fic

A little Cruel Prince fic set about a year after the series ended. Spoilers for the trilogy

Word Count:1378

“What are you wearing?” Cardan enquired as his gaze fell upon the elegant figure that was his wife. She was clothed in a stunning dress of the deepest blue covered in constellations and crescent moons. Around the waist was a simple metal belt, in which hung a sword. The shoulders and neck were covered in an intricate detailing of overlapping scales. All put together, it made her look like a princess from a fantasy novel. Or a Queen of Elfhame. “This is an armored dress.”

“What for?”

“Vivi’s Halloween party of course.” Jude said with some emphasis on the ‘of course’

“We were supposed to dress up?”

“Has no-one ever explained to you what Halloween is?”

“Evidently not.” Cardan looked puzzled as he said it.

“Well, it is a celebration of the death of loved ones. We dress up in costumes-usually grotesque ones-to scare off the evil spirits. Pumpkins are carved into horrendous faces to ward away the evil but they have candles in to bring the good and loved ones home. Children trick-or-treat which is when you go from door to door asking for a trick or a treat. Nowadays, the majority of people just give you sweets but they used to either give you sweets or some other treat or they would trick you whether that be by a riddle or a joke or even cardboard wrapped up in a sweet wrapper. It is a time when people can hide who they truly are and mingle with those they wish to without being judged.”

“It sounds amazing, especially the trick-or-treating. But what am I to wear, I only have my kingly robes.”

“The party is in the human world, your kingly robes will look like a costume. Mine is just an old outfit from my days with Madoc.”

And so, the High King and Queen of Elfhame went to Halloween dressed as themselves. Cardan found it odd that the mortals did not stare at him as he walked toward Vivi’s apartment. He then noticed that the vast majority of them were also costumed in dark cloaks or bright pumpkins. There was even a small boy running about dressed as a skeleton. Jude appeared to have noticed him too. “That skeleton costume lacks accuracy. The femur is too short and look at that clavicle, it doesn’t even stretch all the way to the end of the shoulder!”

“Jude, darling, from what you have told me, Halloween is about having fun, not the accuracy of body parts. Now let us hurry up to your sister’s house.”

The door to Vivi’s apartment was covered in cheap but effective decorations. When they knocked, they were greeted by an overly-enthusiastic Oak. “Cardan, Cardan, will you trick-or-treat with me and Heather? Vivi says that you haven’t celebrated Halloween before, is that true?”

“Slow down with the questions! I would love to trick-or-treat with you and yes, it is true. As you might remember from Elfhame, the Folk don’t celebrate Halloween.” Oak looked very confused as to why people wouldn’t celebrate his favorite holiday but his face quickly brightened up at the thought of going trick-or-treating with his favorite brother. He ran off to tell Heather that another would be joining their party.

Jude left Cardan to find the wine whilst she snuck through the crowd to find her family. The first on her list was Vivi, the only member of the Duarte family that hadn’t abandoned her. She found her sitting at a table with her (clearly drunk) friends. “Woah Jude, that fit is awesome, where’d you get it, fairyland?” asked one of the girls Jude remembered to be called Alice. A smirk played at Jude’s lips as she thought of just how close to the truth she had struck. Vivi giggled in a drunken sort of way as she too thought of the real land of Faeries. The other girls complimented Jude’s outfit and convinced her to sit and drink for a while. When she finally got up, the only thought on her mind was to find Taryn. The last time she had seen her twin was two months or so ago when she had given birth to her child.

She found her standing by the door to a bedroom, cup of gin in her hand and a smile on her face as she chatted to one of the guests. She was dressed head to toe in black silk. It was fitting, a widow dressed as a grieving woman. “Taryn!”

“Jude? I didn’t know you were coming! I love your outfit, where did you get it?”

“It’s just something I found from when we were younger. How are you holding up?”

“Not too bad, losing a lot of sleep but nothing I’m not used to. How’s your job?”

“Very demanding but what do you expect?”

“Oh, what do you do?” asked one of the girls.

“I’m in charge of a pretty large business. And I’m really sorry but I don’t know your name.”

“I’m Hannah. What does your business do?”

“We don’t do anything that would interest you. In fact, there isn’t really any point in us talking about it any more.” Cardan had sidled over and Jude could hear the glamour in his voice as he stopped the girl asking any other questions. Jude decided to abandon her quest to make peace with Madoc and spend some time with Cardan.

They slipped into the tiny spare room. Indeed it was little more than a closet. “So, how was trick-or-treating?”

“Well, I got a full pillow case of sweets although I think that was mainly the grounded teenagers who thought they may have a chance with me. Also, I don’t think that Oak will end up being the High King of Elfhame. He is extremely adamant that he doesn’t want to go back.”

“What does this add to the story? I already knew this.”

“Well, I was thinking that perhaps we should not make him if he truly does not wish to. I do enjoy being the High King and I wanted to ask if you were happy to remain the High Queen.”

“Who would say no to that?”

“Well, seeing as it involves remaining married to me for a considerable length of time and producing heirs with me, you at one point. I merely wished to see if your affections had changed.”

“Cardan, you once told me that your heart, miserable, worm-eaten thing that it is, belonged to me. You then stopped me from saying anything and then turned into a snake. I shall now reply. Once, I would have looked upon my affections to you with disgust, now, however, I feel only the deepest of love when I look upon you. My heart has been shrouded from the world and now I find it complex to unravel the knots tying it down. You once asked how people like you and I take off our armour and I came up with a response. One piece at a time. I am now ready to remove the final piece. My heart is solely yours, my love has been placed upon you and I only hope you can carry the weight. I would gladly sacrifice the throne for your love. Why would I not keep it?”

“My sweet Jude. I knew you would out-do me when I declared my love. That is why I cut you off. I now realise my mistake. I let you compose the poetry over time.” Cardan looked at his wife with nothing less than desire. His lips crashed on hers and she let herself submit to the kiss. The scent of sugar and wine were on his breath and they contrasted her whiskey perfectly. His tongue slid into her mouth as the door opened. “Cardan, have you seen my sweets?” Oak’s voice rang out causing the couple to part. “Unfortunately I have not.”

“OK, thanks anyway.”

The second the door shut, Jude let out a rare laugh. Cardan looked shocked but then laughed as well. The couple settled down at the window, watching the stars and pointing out those similar to the ones in the Elfhame sky. As Halloween switched to the 1st of November, the High King and Queen of Elfhame fell asleep in each other’s arms.

#the cruel prince fanfiction #the cruel prince #the wicked king #queen of nothing #high king of elfhame #high queen of elfhame #prince cardan #cardan greenbriar #queen jude #jude duarte #jude greenbriar #jurdan #cardanandjude

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visd3stele · 3 years

Text

magic and kids

summary:

A/N: I really hope you like it. Thank you for your requests. Loved writing it.

art credit: @phantomrin

TW: none

@britishbookworm2 requested (if you want to leave a request as well, click)

masterlist

°•▪︎~▪︎•°

It's been four years since Taryn decided the mortal world would be a more suitable place to raise her child than Elfhame. Even if her sister was now High Queen, the fairies would still make life hard for her and her baby. Maybe not on purpose, she admits it. But magic runs wild, free and unstoppable. Used to it, the Fae Folk barely notices the dangers. And frankly, they don't care. Not allowed to use it on humans as cruelly as before, some meaner courts claim innocent ignorance. How can an entire society of enchanted beings change overnight? How could they be expected to adjust to human fragility all of a sudden?

So Taryn took her baby, promised her sister to visit and fled to Heather and Vivi's. It wasn't as hard as she'd thought. Getting used to the mortal world, that's it. And if her baby had longer canine than normal, or his ears sharpened to pointy edges to the top, it passed unnoticed. Her son certainly didn't stood out the way Vivi did, even with light brown eyes that looked orange in the sun and rusty red hair. He didn't need much glamouring either, not like Oak, Oriana or Madoc. By the time she sent him to preschool his hair was long enough to cover the ears and no one seemed to notice the teeth even without magic.

For all the talk Taryn did on how she wanted her son to be free of his father in all ways, snapping at Oak when the boy tried to teach him magic before he knew how to properly walk and forbidding her family to bring Fairyland up, she named him Renard.

Fitting, though not what she should have done. Maybe part of her can't let Locke go, not entirely. She knew he didn't particularly wanted the baby, that everything he promised her were pretty lies. But for a few months, it has been real. Their marriage, their love, their lives. She saw her dreams come true, one after another: the mistress of an important household, throwing parties for courtiers, motherhood.

Now that everything she wanted snaped broken in tiny little pieces carried away by harsh winter wind, Taryn Duarte couldn't phantom having her child become like his father.

"It has nothing to do with magic, for fuck's sake!" Vivi exploded once, after Taryn better than not threw Oak and Oriana - who came to visit - out of the apartment for trying to reach Renard's magic. "He won't become a sly, selfish fox if he can change appearance or grow horses out of leaves. It's all about his up-bringing!"

"I want him to be normal, Vivi! That's why I took him here!"

Renard has been barely one year old when the argument happened. But it was enough to take his mother's words to heart.

°•▪︎~▪︎•°

Four years old Renard and twelve years old Oak played outside, jumping in crusty piles of autumn leaves. The princeling hadn't given up his plans to teach his cousin magic. He refused to let go of such opportunity: a friend he didn't have to hide of, one he could play with like he used to in Elfhame.

"Hey, Ren-Ren," Oak said, "check this out!" The older boy held up his hand, brows furrowed in concentration, lip grazed between his teeth. Nothing happened for an alarming amount of time. And then... the leaves twirl around the two cousins, splashing then with guts of wind and scarce dew as it swept them up in a friendly tornado.

Renard chuckled in delight, stretching to catch some of the closer leaves. But as soon as he touched one, the whole thing fell apart. "No!" Do it again, Oak. Do it again."

"I'm sorry, Ren-Ren," Oak faked a yawned and laid on the ground. "Magic is very serious business. Very consuming. I'm too tired to even move." He let his eyes close dramatically, watching Renard between his lashes. Truth be told, every time he did magic Oak felt good. Vibrant. As if the earth itself reached out and gave him life. But Renard didn't need to know that yet. He can definitely learn it by himself if Oak's plan works out.

The younger boy pouted and dropped on the ground. "Not fair," he muttered to himself.

"You know, Ren-Ren, you're half fae. That means there's a pretty good chance you're magic too."

"No, I'm not."

"You can't know that. Come on, give it a try!"

"No, Oak! I'm not magic. I'm not like Father, I'm like Mom. Like Mom, just like that."

Oak straightened himself, but didn't rose from the ground. "Ok, Ren-Ren. Listen up. Magic is not bad. It's fun. Don't you think it's fun?"

"Yes!" Renard nodded enthusiastically. "It's super fun. When you do it, Oak." At that the named boy own enthusiasm faded away in an instant.

"Thank you, Ren-Ren," he deadpanned. "But do you know what's more fun than watching me practice magic?" Not giving the kid a chance to answer, to even take in the question, really, Oak said "To do it yourself."

"Do you really think I should try, Oak?" Clearly, the little boy was attracted to magic. And clearly something was stopping him. But his older cousin slowly made whatever that was seem less big and scary, dragging him along in his qualms.

"Totally!"

Renard pushed his lips forward with his tongue, sticking it out through the gap in his teeth. Caramel eyes shone with desire, his red hair flown around by a cold, pleasant wind. "Ok," he gave in, as expected. "How do I do it?"

The smirk that lightened up Oak's face can only be describes as evil. Though no ill intention hid behind it. Only the knowledge his plan worked out, just like his sister, Jude's.

"Listen to me very carefully, alright? There is not just one way to make magic, Ren-Ren. You have to find your own. But for now, try the basics. Think really hard on what you want to happen. Something easy. Got anything in mind?" Renard frowned, then his eyes landed on a tree which still had some green leaves on its branches and nodded.

"Perfect! Now, imagine whatever you want to happen. Imagine it happening. Are you imagining?"

"Yes."

"No!" Oak groaned. "If you're paying attention to me, then it means you're not focusing on magic."

"But how will I know what to do if I don't listen to you?"

"I told you! Magic is your own, Ren-Ren. It comes naturally. So, dig it up. Use your imagination."

Renard tried to shut out the world around him, picturing the sole tree in his mind. A warm pull tugged at him and he followed. His magic, he tried not to dwell on the joy, but instead focusing on his practice. His magic reaching out. Because he reached out first.

The boy allowed the warmth to take control, guiding him through it. The tree now carved in his mind by detail wasn't enough. He needed action. But just imagining the leaves to fall wouldn't do. Renard couldn't say how exactly he knew it. He just did. Something more tender was needed. The half fae kid had to imply what he wants and trust his magic to follow his lead.

So Renard made himself cold. Chilly. Feeling a breeze of wind creeping inside his clothes, whipping his skin gently. Enough to rip a leaf off a tree, though. Which it did. The wind he summoned couldn't be felt, not really. Only by himself and the green leaves that departed one by one from their branch as if plucked by an invisible hand.

Oak gasped. Then grinned. And then he laughed. Renard broke free of his concentration, pleased to see his magic didn't falter. Not until every and each green leaf from his chosen tree didn't fall. The sight made him still in awe for a couple of seconds. But soon enough he joined his cousin with a bubble laugh, jumping up and down and running to tackle Oak in a tight hug.

"I did it, Oak! I did it!"

"Yes, you did, Rem-Ren. Indeed, you did. Congrats!"

"Can we show auntie Vivi? And auntie Oriana?"

When Madoc and Oriana first came in the mortal world, Taryn wanted nothing to do with them. But years of being cared for by the blue skinned, white haired, pink eyes woman showed their tale. She agreed to see her, but only her. She could be part of her child life, if she wanted.

"Sure. But don't you want to show your mom first?"

"Mom and auntie Heather work a lot. We can show them later." Renard said, but he felt his magic shrinking at the thought of his mother. His Mom didn't like his father. And his magic comes from his father. Is that why his magic doesn't want to reveal itself near Taryn? He hoped it was just him overthinking it, because he loves his Mom and wants to share this with her.

°•▪︎~▪︎•°

Oak stayed with auntie Oriana, who was his mother, so Renard couldn't bring himself to be upset over it. He would want to be with his mother as much as he can as well. So he did a little trick for auntie Vivi, who told him to stay where he was, brought a camera and ordered him to glamour the tea cups again. Renard made them look like pumpkins, since the Halloween being over the corner made him impossibly anxious - in a good way.

Turns out even mortal technology can be fooled by fae's magic. Vivi showed the clip to Heather, who coed over him until Taryn came home.

"Hello, treasure. How was your day? Wanna give mommy a kiss?"

Renard jumped into his mother's arms, pressing a strong kiss on her cheek before starting to tell her about all the fun he had with cousin Oak. "And then he said I should try magic too."

Tamryn stilled. "And?"

"Look, Mom!"

Renard broke a vase, then, with a twitch of his fingers put it back together. "Auntie Vivi says I'm a natural."

"Does she? That's amazing, sweetheart."

But his mother didn't sound thrilled. In fact, her smile wasn't even a smile at all, but a thin line. "I'm sorry, mommy. I knew I shouldn't've done it, but I didn't know why. Now I know: you don't want me using my magic. It'll make me bad, like father."

Renard pushed his lips up front, scrunched his nose up, wiggled his toes, all in an atempt to stop the tears hurting his eyes from falling. When he realized it was in vain, he took off running to his room.

When Taryn entered minutes later she found her son curled on his left side in the middle of the bed, hugging a black goat plushie his uncle Cardan gave him on his birthday tight to his chest. She hated herself for causing the pain struck look on her son's face.

"Hey, sweetie."

"Hi, Mom." Renard wiped his nose with his jumper's sleeve.

"I'm so sorry, sweetie. Mommy was just scared, but that's not your fault. You could never be bad. Magic is not bad. Of course you can practice all you want, but we'll settle some ground, basic rules first. Ok?"

"Really?"

"Rules you can never, ever break. Really."

"Thank you, Mommy! You're the best! Just wait until Oak hears about it."

A/N: Renard means fox in french. Also: oops, guess I finished it earlier than expected and didn't really felt like waiting days to post it 😅

#taryn duarte #folk of the air #cruel prince #the wicked king #queen of nothing #tfoa #oak greenbriar #madoc #magicfolk #the folk of the air #the cruel prince #the queen of nothing #wicked king #my fic #my writing #imagines #imagine #fanfic

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slightlyrebelliouswriter23 · 4 years

Text

Just Haven’t Met You Yet | Jurdan Pregnancy AU

Written for Jurdan Week 2020, Day 2- Pregnancy/Labour AU @jurdannet

Rating: T

Summary: Jude thinks she’s coming down with a fever. Taryn and Vivi think Jude is pregnant. Jude takes a pregnancy test to prove them wrong.

CW: Descriptions of anxiety, panic.

AN: As always, a massive thank you goes to @clockworkgraystairs for holding my hand (and jumping through the screen with anxiety blankets) throughout the course of writing this 🥺❤️

Next Chapter | AO3 | JHMYY Masterlist | Fic Masterlist

Chapter 1- Kiwi

Malls are terrible, awful places. We used to come here a lot to escape Faerie, but even that felt more like something Taryn and I did for Vivi—to reassure her we hadn’t forgotten where we came from.

I never minded coming here for her. In fact, I can’t remember a time when I’ve been anything but impartial to malls. They were a one-stop shop for all sorts of human necessities.

Now, weaving through the throng of mortals, who are all doing their best to drive a pic-axe through my skull by the sounds of their voices alone, I can’t believe I ever tolerated it.

Taryn holds Lorelei’s hand as she bounces along beside her. For only two, Lore is rather swift on her feet. She could give the speed-walking mall moms a run for their money.

Vivi has her arm slung over Heather’s shoulder. They’re laughing at something I don’t hear. Heather carries her Polaroid camera and snaps photo after photo of Lore in all her varying shades of toddler cheek.

Oak is holding my hand, swinging it wildly about between us.

I’m made nauseous by the thick cloud of cloying smells in the hall. Perfume and fake cheese and nail polish, all at once.

There are so many people in my way. Either unintentionally because they’re idiots, or intentionally because they want me to buy something. Both reasons make me want to shove them hard.

There are also way too many babies, screaming bloody murder or shrieking with laughter. I know they’re just babies, and they can’t help it. But it still makes me want to rage at them.

Suddenly, I don’t blame most of my subjects for turning up their noses at humans. We’re horrible.

When we make it to the food court, Oak lets go of my hand. He runs toward Panda Express, pointing at the big glowing signs above the counter. They advertise things like chicken in a bright orange glaze, fried noodles in a plum sauce, and egg rolls fried to a flaky, golden crisp.

Each dish is displayed behind lighted glass on the counter. The sight of them makes me want to vomit.

“I’ll get us a table,” I say.

A crease appears between Vivi’s brows. “You want anything?”

“I’m not hungry.”

“Suit yourself,” she says with a shrug.

Taryn gives me an odd look, but only bends down to pick up Lore, hoisting the toddler onto the jut of her hip so she can survey her lunch options in all the shiny metal bins behind the glass.

I slog off to a group of small tables shoved together to make one long one. Collapsing in a chair, I try to think of things that don’t make me feel ill.

I move through the minutes as one might through quicksand. I have my head in my hands when Vivi plunks herself down across from me. Heather is sipping on a very large soda and takes the seat next to my sister.

They have trays of their own, bearing an assortment of fast food delicacies—waffle fries, orange chicken, a sub sandwich stuffed with deli meats.

“Brought you pizza,” Vivi says, sliding a red plastic tray my way. “You were looking a little pale.”

There’s a massive slice, cheese and grease oozing over the side of a paper plate. Next to it is a bag of Cool Ranch Doritos. Usually, I would scarf down this kind of meal and lick my fingers for good measure.

Now, I just grimace.

“What’s the matter with you?” Vivi asks. “I’ve never seen you turn down pizza before.”

“I told you,” I say. “I’m not hungry.”

Taryn joins us, sliding into the chair next to me. She sets down a tray laden with the finest Asian fusion dishes the Maine Mall has to offer.

“Oak and Lore went to check out the charity box,” she says, nodding in the direction of a huge black funnel. “Gave them three coins each.”

Oak stands near a sloped edge of the funnel and places a coin on its side at the very top. Lore stands on her tip-toes to get a good view, her head of copper curls bobbing in anticipation.

Together, they watch as the coin rolls down the ramp, right into the vortex where it keeps rolling on its edge. Around and around, faster and faster it spins, until it reaches the bottom, dropping with a heavy clink into the collection box below.

“Those things are designed for child manipulation, you know,” Vivi says.

Taryn waves her off. “So long as it keeps them entertained,” she says, then turns to face us again. “What’d I miss?”

“Jude isn’t eating,” Vivi informs her. “Not even pizza.”

My twin frowns at me. “What’s wrong, Jude?”

“Nothing,” I say, pinching the bridge of my nose. “I just have a headache.”

“Soda might help,” Heather says. She scoots her gigantic cup towards me. I consider it for a moment.

She’s right, of course. I could just be dehydrated. Or possibly, I have low blood sugar. Though something in me doubts that after the massive plate of smoked salmon and eggs I all but inhaled this morning.

I press my lips into a thin smile, bringing the straw to my lips. If anything, the cold feels nice.

“Did you eat breakfast before we came?” Taryn asks me.

I nod. “I don’t think that’s the issue, though,” I say, pushing Heather’s soda back across the table. “I haven’t been feeling right since this morning.”

Vivi looks at me, incredulous. “You’ve had a headache this whole time and you didn’t say anything?”

“It’s just a headache. It’ll pass.”

“Is it?” she asks. “Just a headache?”

I hate that she knows me so well. And if I lie, she will know that, too. “No,” I grumble, finally.

“If you were feeling unwell, Jude, you shouldn’t have come.” Vivi says this as a matter of fact. As if we haven’t been planning this trip to the mortal world for months.

Turns out, it’s hard being High Queen and sister to someone with a permanent residence in what is practically a different country.

“I was determined to see you,” I sigh, laying my head down on my folded arms in front of me.

“Yeah?” Vivi says. “And how’s that going for you?”

“It would be better if my sisters were not so solicitous.” My voice comes out less assertive than I’d like and garbled by the table.

“Ah, yes,” Vivi mocks. “How dare we, your family, ask you questions about your well-being?” She snags the pizza off my plate and tears a big bite off the end.

“If we were not so solicitous,” Taryn says, “Cardan would have our heads for sending you home sick.”

“I’ll remind you that I am the haver of heads in our relationship,” I say, glancing up. They all have concerned brows and wary stares, though I don’t believe it’s for their own safety.

I understand their concern and their wariness. I just wish they would aim it at something more important.

I plaster on a feeble grin and add, “Lucky for you, I say you can keep yours.”

“How generous,” Vivi snorts.

“Cardan is more likely to have my head, actually,” I say, closing my eyes.

“It amazes me that you still can’t see it,” Taryn says.

I peek at her face through one squinted eye. She’s shaking her head, which is the worst possible reaction.

“See what, Taryn?” I ask, because if I don’t, she’ll tell me anyway. I brace myself for another lecture on why I shouldn’t spread myself so thin—or some other equally crappy advice that I wouldn’t know how to follow even if I wanted to.

But she just fixes me with a stern look and says, “That boy would paint whole cities red for you.”

I blink. Well, I was not expecting that.

Cardan has always taken pride in the fact that he has killed no one. Rarely shuts up about it, actually. Apart from when he was a serpent—which apparently doesn’t count because he had no self-awareness, or so he claims—his hands are remarkably clean for a king. Of blood, at least.

But I suppose a good deal of time has passed since a threat last loomed over Faerie. Things in Elfhame have been relatively peaceful. Perhaps I’ve forgotten what it feels like to have something I love held constantly in peril. How far both of us would go to protect that thing.

I think about how Cardan looked when I was returned to Elfhame after my sojourn in the Undersea. The fury glittering in his eyes. The waves crashing violently against the rocks.

“She’s right, you know,” Vivi says, “And red is so not my colour. So spill.”

I roll my eyes. “Fine. I feel… lightheaded. Dizzy. A little nauseous, too. Like I may have a fever or something.”

“Do you have cold sweats?” Heather asks, stabbing a piece of orange chicken with her fork.

“No, I’m just really warm.”

“It is summer,” Taryn points out.

I shake my head. “This is different. I’m exhausted, too. The kind of tired where everything hurts. That could be the fever, though.”

A thoughtful expression crosses Taryn’s face. Her gaze drifts to where Lore and Oak still watch with rapt attention as their coins spin down the funnel. I think about joining them, if not to escape this interrogation.

“Or,” Vivi interjects, “It could be that you’re only twenty-one, and you’re running an entire kingdom?”

I clench my jaw. “And I’ve been doing so for three years, Vivi. I’m used to it.”

“Maybe this is your burnout.” She takes another bite of my pizza, then points the slice at me, a cheese-smeared accusation. “Maybe you need a little breather.”

My nails dig into the meat of my palms.

We’ve had this discussion before. It unsettles me that she should be so sure I will crack under the pressure of responsibility. But she is as adamant about this as she has been since the day of our coronation.

I will always be the naive little sister to her. No matter the heights or station to which I ascend. I could become like a god, and Vivi will always think I am in over my head.

“It would be natural, Jude,” Heather says softly. “To want a bit of a break.”

“I don’t burn out,” I snap, glaring at them. “And I don’t need a break from being Queen. So stop trying to convince me. It isn’t going to work.”

“Yeesh,” Vivi says, “We were only suggesting—”

“Well, don’t.”

“Okay, okay.” She makes a gesture of surrender and goes back to her food.

I wonder briefly if Madoc put her up to this. If, somehow, he managed to sink his hooks into her, too—convinced her to persuade me off the throne so he could swoop in, the bright knight once more.

But then I remember how much Vivi loathes our father. She would rather live in Elfhame forever than see him come to power.

“Jude?” Taryn’s voice sounds. “When are you due for your next period?”

I narrow my eyes. “If you’re trying to imply something witty about PMSing, you can shove off, Taryn,” I say. “I’m not on my period.”

“I wasn’t,” she tells me, looking earnest enough. “And that’s not what I’m asking.”

My eyebrows sink into a concentrated V. Now that she mentions it, I’m really not sure. Which I am aware may sound stupid for a mortal like me, who’s bleedings occur monthly.

But the irregularity of my cycles has always made tracking them a futile task. Stress, I’ve heard, is reason enough for this in humans. And I can’t remember more than a handful of days in Faerie that haven’t been stressful.

Besides, ever since I became High Queen, I’ve had more salient things on my mind. Usually, my period just happens—and I deal with it when it does. “I don’t know,” I tell her. “Probably soon.”

Taryn bites her lip.

Suddenly, we are rushed by two bounding children. Their excitement rolls off of them in exhausting waves. I rest my chin on my arms again.

Oak grabs a fry off of Vivi’s plate, and Lorelei climbs into Taryn’s lap. She flings her little arms around her mother’s neck.

“Mama,” Lore says, nuzzling Taryn’s shoulder. “Can we have more coins?”

“What happened to the ones I gave you?”

“All gone.” She holds out her empty palms, proof they’d spent their last copper.

“I’ll make you a deal,” Taryn says. “Eat two pieces of chicken, and I’ll give you two coins.”

Lore’s eyes light up at the opportunity for a bargain. Bargains are things that grown faeries make. Young fae are typically, and understandably, excluded from such dealings.

I am unsure whether Lore hasn’t yet grasped the rules of spoken word and how differently they apply to mortal tongues, or if she simply trusts her mother enough to know she won’t go back on her promise.

Either way, she reaches for the plate on Taryn’s tray.

“If I eat five pieces will you give me five coins?” Oak asks through a mouthful of orange chicken.

“I’ll give you five coins if you don’t make a mess of your shirt while you’re eating,” Heather says, shoving a wad of napkins in Oak’s face just as a glob of sauce dribbles down his chin. She swipes it up quickly.

Oak gives her a broad grin. “Deal.”

When Lore is finished with her two chicken nuggets, Taryn fishes out a velvet coin purse from her bag. Heather dutifully inspects Oak’s shirt before digging in her own pockets for change. Once they’ve collected their earnings, the children go running back to the charity box.

Taryn turns on me. “When was the last time you and Cardan… you know…”

Heat pricks my cheeks, and I give her a wild look. “Are you really asking me about my sex life right now? There are children.”

Taryn seems unruffled. “They’re going to learn about it some day. Besides, they can’t hear us.”

I think about fae hearing and really hope she’s right. “If you’re suggesting,” I hiss, “That I’m in a piss poor mood because of a dry spell, I’ll have you know it’s not that.”

“So, recently then.”

I grit my teeth. “Yes.”

Taryn’s face twists in thought. “How recent is rece—”

“Dear gods, Taryn. Last night,” I blurt. “It was last night.”

Heather suppresses a snicker behind her coke. Vivi pops a Dorito into her mouth, smirking. My cheeks blaze.

I don’t know if I’m more mortified by the intrusive nature of her questions or by what she’s implying. That she believes PMS or a dry spell over the possibility of illness.

“Okay,” Taryn says. “And the time before?”

I look daggers at her. “I’m not going to tell you every time I’ve had sex in the past year.”

“I don’t need the whole year.” A teasing smile tugs at her lips. “Just the past month or so.”

I steeple my fingers in front of me. “Let’s just assume Cardan and I are not in a dry spell and have not been for… longer than that.”

“You’ve been taking a draught then, I take it,” Taryn says. “Or at least using protection?”

I feel myself blanch.

Oh.

Oh no.

My stomach does a little flip. She cannot be suggesting what I think she’s suggesting. Even if it were possible for me to be pregnant, which it’s not, I’d rather be at once PMSing and in a dry spell.

Regardless, I will not sit here and be lampooned by my own sister.

My chair screeches across the tiles as I go flying to my feet. Then, I’m taking off across the food court in a breathless fury.

I’m about halfway to Claire’s when Taryn calls from behind me. “Jude, wait! Where are you going?”

I whirl around on a dime, coming face to face with her. She almost runs right into me.

“I am going to CVS,” I tell her, “To pick up some Tylenol for this headache, which definitely does not have anything to do with pregnancy, as you so kindly hinted for all the mall to hear.”

“I didn’t mean anything by it,” my sister says. “Honestly.”

Over her shoulder, I see Vivi, Heather, Oak, and Lorelei have caught up with us now. They stand a few feet away, apprehension written on their faces.

I heave a sigh. “I know. I’m sorry, it’s just—” My eyes mash shut. “My head is killing me.”

A gentle hand comes to rest on my shoulder. “We can leave the mall, if that’s what you want.”

I’m too weak to shrug her off so I nod meekly.

“Okay,” Taryn says. She turns to where the others are gathered and waves them over. “Come on, guys.”

“Are we going to Build-A-Bear?” Oak asks. “I want to make one for Lore.”

“That’s very kind of you, sweets,” Taryn says. “But we’re going to CVS and then we’re going home.”

“CVS?” Heather asks.

“Jude needs Tylenol,” Taryn informs her. “For her, uh… headache.”

☽☽☽☽☽

There’s a CVS right across the street from the mall. We walk to it. Though the sun droops low in the sky, it’s still muggy outside. Swarms of gnats flit about our ears.

The walk does nothing to quell the stress of our little outing. Nor does it shake the lingering sense of anxiety clinging to my thoughts.

The automatic doors to CVS slide open when we approach. Without saying a word, I stalk off to find the medicine aisle.

“I hope you’re planning on buying a pregnancy test, too,” Vivi calls after me.

I shoot a middle finger over my shoulder and don’t look back.

“Jude’s pregnant?” I hear Oak gasp.

I shove my hands deeper into my pockets, turning sharply down the nearest aisle so I’m out of their view.

Could this be any more mortifying?

I don’t think I’m pregnant, of course. We’ve been using protection. Or at least, all the protection Elfhame can provide on a regular basis. A simple draught cooked up by one of the palace nurses. Rare, considering the low birthrate of faeries, but not unheard of.

I’d been embarrassed to ask for it in the first place. Fae children are exceedingly uncommon, and I had a feeling this meant any measures taken to prevent them would be frowned upon.

But the thought of raising a child while still trying to gain our footing on the throne is what ultimately sent me hurtling for the nurse’s corridor. Tiny crystal vials of varying colors have been delivered to the High Chambers every morning since.

I haven’t missed a dose.

I find the Tylenol in the medicine aisle. I grab a thermometer, too, in case Heather doesn’t have one.

This headache makes me feel like someone’s cracking my skull open like a walnut. The air conditioning in CVS is blessedly cool, though, and I try to focus on that.

With my haul, I make my way to the checkout. Vivi is standing there with a bag of her own, flipping through the glossy pages of a magazine. She has a lollipop stick hanging out of the side of her mouth.

“What did you buy?” I ask when I’ve paid.

“This lollipop,” Vivi tells me, pulling it out and giving it a flourish. It’s bottle green and looks disgusting. “Oh, and pregnancy tests.” She shoots me a devilish grin.

My stomach does another little flip. If it wasn’t for the fact that my sisters are currently trying to prove that I am pregnant, I would have rushed to the parking lot to be sick. As it stands, I’m trying to prove them wrong.

I muster up a simper for my dear older sister. “For you, I hope.”

“I’m not the pregnant one.” Vivi closes the magazine she’s holding and places it back on the rack.

“Neither am I,” I tell her firmly, nodding at the bag in her hand. “So you can return those.”

She doesn’t budge. “Oh, come on, Jude. Humour us.”

“No.” I step around her and out the automatic doors. “I don’t think you’d find me very funny.” The summer air is thick and cloying—claustrophobic on my skin.

Vivi doesn’t leave off, remaining close on my tail. Which is annoying and makes me want to snap again. But I think that might bolster her and Taryn’s point further, so I clench my jaw against her badgering.

“If you’re so sure you’re not pregnant, what do you have to lose?”

“Time?” I offer, looking for the bus stop on this side of the street. “And my dignity.”

“Fine,” Vivi says, “What say we make a bargain?”

A laugh bubbles to my lips. “I’m not bargaining with you.”

“A deal, then?” Vivi grabs my wrist to stop me. She wants me to take her seriously. I do not, but I roll my eyes and wait. “I will give you $8.95 in real mortal dollars for every test that comes back negative.”

I cock my head to the side. “Why $8.95?”

“That’s how much one of these babies cost.” Vivi pulls a box out of the bag and gives it a shake. The contents rattle around inside.

I give her an acidic look. Really? A baby pun? Tasteless considering I’m not pregnant.

I regard her for a moment. If I take those tests, I could get my sisters to stop hounding me about things I am nowhere near ready to consider—things that make me want to be swallowed up by a black hole, or fling myself into the stormy sea.

I’d also get some money out of it. Which I would probably just give back to Vivi and Heather anyway, since they’re always skint. But I could buy myself a lotto ticket first. Or maybe a packet of Skittles. The tropical kind that taste like a sugary vacation.

“And if it comes back positive?” I ask out of curiosity, not because I believe it will. I want to know what’s in it for her, and I refuse to participate in being the butt of a joke for less than thirty bucks.

Vivi’s cat-eyes gleam in the setting sun. “Consider it my ‘congrats on getting knocked up but please don’t ask me to attend the birth of said little progeny’ present.”

I scoff. As if I’d want anyone but the midwives there to witness such a butcherly event.

I would maybe allow Cardan to accompany me; but only if he wanted to, and only if I could use him as a personal punching bag in lieu of an epidural.

Then I wonder if they might have epidurals in Elfhame. Or some magical substitute of the sort. If they don’t, maybe I can ask that one be acquired from the nearest mortal hospital.

I shake my head because I’m getting way too ahead of myself. I’m not pregnant, and don’t plan on being for a very long time. I square my shoulders.

“Fine,” I say to Vivi. “Make it ten real mortal dollars. For every negative or inconclusive test. Consider the extra charge a tax for my wasted time and dignity.”

Vivi gasps a mock. “A Queen taxing her subject? You know, some around here might think that’s in poor taste.”

I have no idea what she means by that, so I shrug and pluck the lollipop from her mouth. It makes a popping sound against her lips. “Fortunately,” I say, “I don’t care what anyone thinks.” I stick the candied end between my teeth.

It tastes like kiwi and a lot better than I expect.

With that, I sling my plastic CVS bag over my shoulder and strut across the parking lot toward the bus stop.

“Hey!” Vivi shouts after me. “If you get your gross sick germs all over that—”

“According to you,” I remind her, “I’m not sick. So you have nothing to worry about.”

☽☽☽☽☽

We take the bus back to Vivi and Heather’s apartment. The whole way there, Oak asks a string of insufferable questions.

“Is it a boy or girl?”

“We don’t know that yet, sweets,” Taryn says, bouncing Lore on her knee.

“What are you going to name them?”

“I think that’s up to Jude and Cardan to decide,” Vivi tells him.

“Am I going to be a big brother again?” Oak wonders.

“No, dear,” Heather says, chuckling. “That’s not how that works.”

“You’ll be an uncle again,” Vivi grins. “Even better.”

“And a cousin,” Taryn says. “Technically.”

Heather frowns. “How does that…”

“It’s a complicated family tree.” Vivi stretches an arm over Heather’s shoulder. “I’ll draw it out for you when we get home.”

I scowl, refusing to look any of them in the eyes.

Reaching into my shopping bag, I retrieve the bottle of Tylenol and pop two in my mouth, swallowing them dry.

I press my forehead against the grimy window. Exhaustion sweeps over me. I know I’ll need a nap, or several, after this. I close my eyes and hope that home comes swiftly.

☽☽☽☽☽

When we arrive back at the apartment, Heather puts the kettle on for tea. I flop down on the couch and let the weight of the day smother me into the cushions.

Oak leaps over the back of the sofa, dropping down beside me. He turns the television on. It’s already on Cartoon Network, so he leaves it there and finishes off my bag of Doritos that Vivi rolled up and saved when it became clear I wasn’t going to eat them.

I stare at the TV without really seeing it. Everything is acute, splintered in my vision. The bus ride broke down any resolve I once had. I am nauseous with nerves.

I know I can’t be pregnant, but what if I am?

I think about how I wanted to scream at the babies in the mall for crying. I think of the way I wanted to shout at Sophie for breaking down when I was trying to save her. Of the way the sound of child’s laughter has only ever made me a particular shade of cruel I don’t like to think about overmuch.

I would be a horrible mother.

“Here,” Vivi says, sticking a bottle of Gatorade right in my face, making me blink. “Drink up.”

I cross my arms over my chest and slump further into the sofa. “M’not thirsty.”

“Well, that’s too bad, your Majesty,” she quips, crouching down so she’s at my eye level. Like I’m a child. I scowl like one, too. “You’re going to drink this for two reasons. One, you’re looking even paler now than you did in the food court.”

“The bus made me nauseous,” I tell her. “I’ll be fine.”

Vivi ignores me. “And two, you have to pee on a stick,” she says, gesturing to the CVS bag on the coffee table. “Or, I guess, three sticks.”

I groan.

“Ah, ah, ah,” she says, wagging a finger. “You made a deal, remember?”

I glare up at her for a moment before snatching the bottle from her hand. “Fine.” The cap clicks as I twist it off and take a swig of blue liquid. I wipe my mouth with the back of my hand. “But only because when I win, I’m buying myself the biggest package of Tropical Skittles I can find. And I’m sharing none with you.”

“If you’re not pregnant, Jude, I will give you thirty bucks and all the Tropical Skittles in the candy aisle.” Then, my awful older sister leans over and plants an awful kiss on my forehead.

I feel my face flood with red humiliation.

Vivi joins Heather and Taryn at the dining table. I remain sulking on the couch with Oak, watching cartoons and sipping my Gatorade, trying hard not to think of screaming babies and dirty diapers.

When the bottle is empty, I grab the plastic bag of horrors from the coffee table and head for the bathroom. On my way, Vivi raises a mug of tea in salute.

“Good luck!” Taryn chimes.

I don’t know what she means by that so I roll my eyes and slam the door.

Alone in the bathroom, I can finally think. I lean over the sink taking deep calming breaths.

This is stupid, I tell myself. There’s no reason to get worked up. Yet, my heart races like I’m sparring an especially challenging opponent.

I raise my eyes to the mirror.

I look terrible. Worse probably than when I first tried my hand at mithridatism. Definitely worse than after my first lesson with the Ghost.

I splash cool water on my face to calm down.

My hands shake as I remove the tests one by one from their Pepto Bismol pink cardboard boxes. I lay them out in a neat row on the counter. Then, I read the instruction pamphlets through. Twice.

I shake my head. I am being a coward. I just need to buck up and do it. Vivi is right. I’m not pregnant, so what do I have to lose?

Waiting is the hard part. I flush the toilet and place the peed-on sticks back in their little row on the counter before washing my hands. The instructions say I am to wait three minutes to confirm a negative result.

Three minutes isn’t that long, I think. But time always moves differently when you’re expecting something.

I lie down on the tiled floor, resting my head on the braided floor mat.

Once, when Taryn and I were little and still living in the mortal world, we were charged with taking care of the class newt for the weekend.

Taryn was off buying new shoes with mom because hers didn’t fit anymore, and I stayed home to watch Fig (yes, his name was Fig the Newt—but what else could you expect from a class full of six-year-olds).

Of course, newts don’t really do much, so I got bored after about five minutes. I felt sad that Fig should always have to stay in his little tank. So I took him out for some “fresh air”, sitting him atop the lime green composition notebook on my nightstand.

“There,” I remember telling him. “It’s green, just like home.”

I fed Fig treats from the palm of my hand and, after a few, I decided he must be thirsty from all this excitement. Newts liked cool, wet environments, according to Mrs. Myers.

So, like the dutiful temporary ward I was, I went downstairs and filled a plastic Tupperware container with water. I was only gone for a minute. I didn’t think it would matter. But when I got back to my room, Fig was gone.

Vivi helped me search the upstairs for an hour before mom and Taryn got home. Then we all searched some more, tearing up the whole house in our wake.

We never found Fig. Taryn was devastated.

The next time we were at the farmer’s market, we bought a cactus from the plant lady and named it in his honor. A month later, Fig the cactus died.

I can’t take care of a salamander. I can’t even take care of a cactus. I am known by an entire kingdom of immortal creatures as a murderous wielder of blades.

How the hell am I supposed to care for a baby?

A knock sounds at the door and I start.

“Jude?” Taryn’s voice comes muffled through the door. “You alright in there?”

Looking at my watch, I realise I’ve been lying here for far longer than three minutes.

“Give her time, Taryn,” I hear Heather say. “She might still be working up the nerve.”

“Ten bucks says she jumped out the window,” Vivi says. “Fled the scene.”

“You need to stop making bets,” Heather scolds, “Or it’ll become a habit.”

The rest of their conversation fades away as I swallow and pick myself up off the floor. My heart speeds. Squaring my shoulders, I look down at the three tests.

Six lines glare back at me. They are judging little things, as if they see the whole of me and know that I am much too unworthy for the role I will soon have to play.

There is something rising in my throat. I feel as if I’m drawing away from the cluttered bathroom, the din of chatter outside the door, the rawness in my chest. Back and back into the haze of my mind. Slipping into it is like slipping into a pool of held breath.

I’m not pregnant. This isn’t real. I’m going to wake up now. I’ll be sweaty and panicked, but Cardan will be there to reassure me and everything will be fine.

Only, it’s not.

Because when I open my eyes again, I’m still in the bathroom in Vivi and Heather’s apartment. And the pregnancy tests are still lying in all their positive, two-lined reprehensibility on the countertop.

I rip the door open.

A crowd has gathered in the hall right outside, it seems. They lapse into immediate silence when they see me.

“Well?” Someone says. I am not sure who, because I’m staring blankly past all of them, into the sitting room where Oak and Lore are sprawled on the couch sharing the last of my Doritos.

“Positive,” I say, and I’m numb when I say it. Then, I look at them and feel nothing about that, too. “They’re positive.”

“All of them?” Taryn squeaks.

I give a curt nod of my head.

“Congratu—” Vivi starts, but I cut her off with a glower.

“Don’t.” I push past the group into the living room. Oak and Lore look up at the disturbance.

“Jude, wait,” Taryn says.

I’m being followed, I can tell. But I don’t pause, heading straight for the kitchen. Once there, I turn on the stove.

“What are you doing?” Vivi wants to know. They’re all standing in the doorway of the kitchen, observing me like I’m some sort of museum exhibit.

“I’m making tea,” I tell her in as calm a voice as I can. Blood rushes in my ears. I fill the kettle with water from the tap. It all sounds the same.

“So… that’s it?” Vivi asks. “You don’t want to talk about it?”

I slam the kettle down on the stove. Water sizzles and pops as it sloshes over the sides. “You want to talk, Vivi?” I whirl around. Three pairs of eyes widen, their expressions nearly identical. They think I’ve gone mad. They’re probably right. “Fine,” I say. “Why don’t we talk about how this is all your fault.”

Vivi gives me a horribly smug look. “I should hope not,” she says. “You have no one but yourself and your husband to blame for this, sweetheart.”

I rake my fingers through my hair. “If you hadn’t pushed me into taking those stupid tests, pregnancy and panic and… pregnancy panic would be the furthest things from my mind.” I choke all of this out and hate how brittle my voice sounds.

“It wouldn’t make you any less pregnant, though,” Vivi says pointedly.

A sound of frustration gutters in my throat. Throwing my head back, I implore the ceiling for guidance, but there’s only water stains. I dig the heels of my palms against my eyes.

“Jude,” Taryn says. “Why are you so distressed by this? You love Cardan, don’t you?”

“I do,” I rasp, letting my arms fall to my sides. “Gods, you have no idea.” Everything is blurry for a second while my eyes readjust to the light.

Taryn purses her lips. “Then why aren’t you happier about this?”

“Just because you were a teen mom,” I snap, “Doesn’t mean the rest of us want to be.”

Taryn flinches like I’ve slapped her. She folds her arms around herself.

“Stop being a jackass, Jude,” Vivi chides. “Besides, you’re twenty-one. You’ll hardly be a teen mom.”

“I just…” My jaw sets. “I don’t understand how this could’ve happened.”

“Really?” Vivi asks, disbelieving. “Because it seems pretty self-explanatory to me.”

I give her a black look. “We use protection. Always. I take a draught every morning before bed.”

Taryn pulls an odd face, but she quickly averts her gaze when she notices my attention, and starts fidgeting with the tassels on her shirt.

“And you haven’t missed a dose?” Heather asks me.

“No.”

“You’re sure?”

I nod.

“Maybe the nurses made it wrong,” Taryn suggests, and I arch a brow at her. “What? Mistakes happen.” She shrugs, mumbling under her breath, “Clearly.”

I choose to ignore her snide remark. “If that’s the case, they’re all dead.”

“Whoa, hang on,” Vivi warns. “That’s a pretty steep price to pay for what’s normally considered a good thing.”

“Yeah, well, it’s not a good thing to me.” The words barrel out of me before I can stop them. And then they just hang there in the air like grotesque festoons.

The silence that follows is unbearably sharp. So sharp it feels as if someone has punctured my lungs with a shard of it. I don’t feel bad about my outburst, because what I said was true. I just feel ashamed for having spoken the thought aloud. It’s not really the kind of thing a normal person would say about their unborn child. Though, I feel maybe that just reinforces my theory.

Either way, I am so out of sorts I can’t keep track of what to say and what to keep to myself. I am entirely unmoored.

“I’m going to bed,” I say in a frayed sort of voice. “Excuse me.”

I duck out of the kitchen.

It is a ridiculous excuse. It’s only a little past midday by faerie standards. But I don’t think I can bear their judgement much longer.

Tonight, I will allow myself to cower, because it is the only thing I presently know to do.

When I’m back in my makeshift room, which is actually Heather’s office space turned guest bedroom, I close the door softly behind me and lean against it.

I can’t breathe without tremors racking my body. It feels like air is being forced into my lungs, one long wave of breath that rises and rises but never crests. This feeling claws at my chest. I’m afraid it will never stop.

All these years, I’ve resented Vivi for treating me like I couldn’t handle myself, like I was in over my head. Now, I think that maybe she’s been right all along. I’m in way too far over my head.

I feel sick to my stomach. One hand raises on its own accord, coming to rest on my belly. I snatch it away instantly.

To steady the panic, I set small goals for myself.

Stop leaning against the door.

Stand up straight.

Walk over to the satchel in the corner of the room.

Find nightclothes.

I change into my pyjamas, biting my lip hard the whole time to keep from crying. When I slip under the sheets and turn out the light, I haven’t shed one tear.

I guess that’s a small kind of accomplishment, too.

☽☽☽☽☽

AN: This fic has been in the works since June and I’m so happy to finally be putting the first part out into the world! The next chapter will be less angsty, I promise.

I hope you enjoyed reading this. If you did, reblogs and comments are highly, highly appreciated. It may take me a little bit but I WILL respond to every single one—they truly make my day. If you’d like to be added to my tag list, just let me know!

Back to the forest now.

-Em 🖤💫

Chapter Title Inspo: Kiwi by Harry Styles

Tag List: @velarhysismine @knifewifejude @the-mithridatism-of-jude-duarte @clockworkgraystairs @thesirenwashere @courtofjurdan @nightbringer @aelin-queen-of-terrasen @whocares-idont @babycardan @sweetlyvillainous @aesthetics-11 @storiesandschemes @jurdanhell @poeticbrownmermaid @thechainofiron @random-llama-socks @villanellevi @lady-thea-of-narnia @b00kworm @flowersinvegas @vanessa172003 @cardanstrickytail @queen-of-glass @judiecardan @words-of-the-wise @scarznstars @charincharge @fizziefaerie @fateandluminary @tessas-herondales @styles-taylor @jyoti96 @losssssstttttt @transbordeamento @katsemkitgostadetog @gloriouspalacebakerylawyer @woodsbeyond1 @hizqueen4life @highqueenjudeduarte @m-like-magic1-blog @dorkzrul @whataboutmyfries @livelovereading123 @queenofgreenbriar @ireallyshouldsleeprn @lifeminuspickles @df3ndyr @christalpaez @hurema @the-poets-muse @rhysandsrightknee @alta-lok143 @aknymph @iammissstark @st00pid231 @disco-tits1 @the-third-me @cardanslittletail @katexrenee @fandomfanatic987 @justtryintolivemybestlife @hopefullyanauthor @junipersuns @curlyredqueen06 @emmabookworm08 @thebookish-fangirl @pig-on-acid @theoceanfaewriter @acourtofbookworms @theirownconstellation @violamom

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shadowturtlesstuff · 3 years

Text

A day dedicated to Jude

I was looking through my google docs and found a random jurdan fic so i quickly edited it. Enjoy

We are alone, walking through our rose garden as the sun starts to set over Elfhame. There is another revel tonight, like most nights, but tonight serves more of a purpose. At least it does for my husband and I. A few weeks ago I accidentally told Cardan my birthday, and so he took it upon himself to organise a revel in my honour. He thankfully neglected to tell people why it was honouring me; he has just claimed that he can honour his wife whenever he likes. Which made me smile despite the fact I did not want any sort of attention around my birthday. Perhaps just by my sisters, Oak, Heather and Cardan. Alas, tonight I will dine with Elfhame and my husband and dance and try to enjoy my night.

Cardan had refused to go to meetings and made sure I wasn't able to attend any, either. Again missing the reason behind his actions. The Court of Shadows knows, we spent time with them drinking, until the Bomb and Roach decided to spend the rest of the day in the mortal world until tonight. The Ghost has disappeared in search of my twin most likely. So we had spent the day in bed, over a year of being married, of being High King and Queen together, and the simplicity of the day had been strange to us both. Cardan had become used to it far faster than I. Yet I will admit I did enjoy doing nothing, worrying about only my husband, which I always did but there were no other worries alongside it. It was nice. As much as that thought would've scared me in the past it does not now. I welcomed relaxing on our bed and resting my sore muscles.

My stomach has healed nicely from where my father stabbed me. Often I find Cardan tracing the line when we are in bed together. His face is always lost in thought when I find his hand absentmindedly caressing the line. He has expressed his hatred for Madoc many times, which is completely understandable. So when I find him in that state I simply take his hands and reassure him I am okay, that we made it.

I take his hand now, which surprises us both but he smiles. It was his idea to walk together before we entered our party. Even though we spent today together alone, he wanted one more time with me. So we've dressed ready and are walking slowly together. "Thank you for the revel Cardan, even though I specifically told you I didn't want to celebrate." I feel his pace drop and he turns and faces me. I have not explained why I wished not to celebrate but with Cardan I didn't need to. He understood that it was a reminder that I was mortal; one of my many shortcomings. Fae do not age the same ways as mortals, and my life would end far faster than Cardans'. It was a reminder I was running low on time to spend with my husband in the peace that we'd worked so hard for.

"And I told you that I simply cannot just ignore your birthday. It is a day where I can tell you how much I adore you and you cannot stop me." It never ceased to amaze me how much we have both changed by opening our hearts to each other. He kisses my hand and pulls me into a hug. Cardan, I have found out, loves to cuddle. He will do it any chance he gets. Not that I mind it, often when I feel his arms snake around me whilst I’m working I welcome the small break it offers.

“Very well husband, I supposed we should go to the party.”

“Your party.” He counters and I nearly shake my head at his antics.

We walk hand in hand together, the guards open the doors for us and we make our way into the main hall. All eyes turn to us. I spot my sister with the Ghost, Vivi and Heather on the other side of the room dancing together already. Taryn left her child with Oriana for the night and I’m sure she was complaining about not being with him. Cardan and I have only seen my nephew a handful of times. When Cardan held him for the first time his eyes had held promise for our future. Both of us had not been raised as a child should be or in a way that prepared us to be parents; but we both held hope that we’d learn together. I know Cardan would be the most loving father a child could ask for.

Cardan leads me to my throne and instead of going to his he sits on the arm of my chair. He refuses to leave my side, and whilst it isn’t strange for him to sit here, I fear that our people will figure out why this is in my honor and that Cardan is being more of a husband than High King. Most revels we have roles to play, to appear menacing and diplomatic and everything people in charge should be. Cardan is more open with gestures of love than I am, yet I can’t help but think of all the things they could claim when it is just a mortal birthday he’s celebrating.

It is a long time before Cardan and I have a peaceful second with each other. People have been coming to us all night, to show respect as they always do and to try and figure out any information about tonight. They haven’t. I am tired even though I have done nothing all day. I would happily spend tomorrow in bed with my husband if I didn’t have more meetings that I pushed back to have today off. Cardan is still sitting next to me, and I’m half tempted to fall asleep on him despite being in front of everyone. Instead of doing that I grip his elbow. He’s currently gesturing to some fae I didn’t realise appeared so taking his hand would only annoy the fae he’s talking to. So I settle for the elbow and he wordlessly slows his hand gestures until it is just his left moving. Then eventually that stops and the fae has left us all alone and Cardan is facing me. I give him a small smile, and he returns it. “Do you want to leave?” He asks.

I sigh. Yes, I do. I want to be in bed with him holding me as I do nothing. But I know I can’t get into that habit no matter how much I now wish to. “No, we haven’t even spoken to my sisters yet and I think they’ll hang you if I don’t see them at all.” I tell him and then laugh when he panics. “I’m kidding, kinda. I mean, if they don’t at least wish me happy birthday then they’ll be a bit angry.”

“Let’s go find your sisters then shall we?”

We find Taryn with Vivi and Heather instead of the Ghost and I am immediately embraced by them all. They whisper happy birthday so that everyone around us cannot hear and then Vivi notices that Cardan is just standing awkwardly watching the four of us hug and insists that he joins us. Somewhat reluctantly he wraps his arms around me and Taryn and joins our hug, finding a way to press a kiss to my head. Despite my tiredness, and I suppose my stubbornness, to not celebrate my birthday I smile at the people willing to tolerate me in this way.

“How’s your little one?” I ask Taryn as we all move from our hug. The fae are all listening and hovering but I don’t really care too much.

“He’s getting so big, you two must come see him soon. He misses his Uncle Cardan.” This makes Heather giggle as Cardan winces. He doesn’t mind it but would prefer not to be called that here. When we got home and spoke about it he kept repeating Uncle Cardan like he still couldn’t believe he was a part of our family. As messed up as all of us are, I am happy we faced so much to find this life.

“When we were with him yesterday he squeezed my finger and I honestly nearly had a heart attack.” Heather, ever the dramatic, going into more detail about the time she and Vivi spent with Taryn yesterday. Because Taryn lives alone she often has my sister and her girlfriend around often and if me and Cardan didn’t have to work to run a kingdom I’m sure Cardan would be with his little nephew all day.

I feel Cardans' hand move around me and he holds me in a side hug as we listen to our family. Again he kisses my temple and this time I rest my head on my husbands' chest and smile. “Happy birthday my Wicked Queen.”

(i’m using normal tags so if you only read my cressworth sorry)

@fangirling-again @kittycat2187 @goatahoan @city-of-fae @the-hoofflepooff @ink-insomnia @purplecreatorhorsewagon @boredbookwormgirl @goddess-of-writing-wars @lovecakeandmore @yikesitsmaddie @loveyatopluto @bookscressworth @androgynousdeputylawyershoe @fandomtakeover @throneoftsc

#tfota #jude #cardan #jurdan #cruel prince #wicked king #queen of nothing #cardan greenbriar #jude duarte

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darklesmylove · 4 years

Text

under the mistletoe | jurdan

happy holidays to all of my lovely fellow jurdan lovers, here is a little bit of fluffy christmas drabble as my gift to you <3

dedicated to my bff @staticpetrichor

enjoy!

tags: @illyrianbeauty @thomasscresswell @mariamuses @lost-in-fictionn @b00kworm @clockworkgraystairs @sweetlyvillainous @totallyamazingasshole @snusbandxknifewife @acourtofabsandillyrians @maastrash @nalgenewhore @vivorsomething @nalgenewhore

***

"Are you seriously making zombie gingerbread cookies, Oak?" Jude attempted a motherly sigh of disapproval, the chastising rendered useless when a smirk of amusement pulled at the corner of her mouth. He grinned devilishly in return, flashing his newly awarded gap tooth before hunching back over to splatter more blood red icing around the frosted mouth. Vivi snickered, patting his head lovingly before hefting the ornate dish holding the Christmas ham onto the weathered dining room table.

Heather had almost singlehandedly cooked the entire dinner herself after the brief but disastrous help Cardan had attempted to offer. Instead, she had shooed him into the living room to decorate to his hearts desire.

With a flourish, Jude finished her own Christmas cookie, a gold and silver candy cane that glinted like evermore in the low light. After a quiet moment of contemplation, she placed the cookie on top of the steadily growing pile they all had contributed to throughout the day, proceeding to get up and dust the multicolored sprinkles from her sweater.

"The living room has been suspiciously quiet for a bit now so I'm going to check on the idiot," she announced to no one in particular, making Vivi let out a less than elegant snort.

"Make sure he doesn't burn the whole place down."

Jude hummed in assent before making her way down the hallway, footsteps padding lightly against wooden floorboards.

"Holy shit."

Her mouth fell open to cartoonish proportions as she rounded the corner.

Lights. Everywhere.

An explosion of technicolor blanketed the room, flashing in bright colors with excessive holiday cheer, layered thick over curtains and walls and furniture. A path spiraled from the floor up around the sizable Christmas tree that filled the air with the scent of pine, twisting through branches and ornaments in an elaborate tangle that likely would take hours to undo.

And who else but her husband, Cardan Greenbriar, was in the middle of it all, holding yet another strand of twinkling gold between slender, elegant fingers. He flashed a dazzlingly guilty smile.

"It looks like Santa threw up in here," she let out a breathy laugh of disbelief, making an adorable crinkle appear between his brows.

"Santa?"

"He's a made up old man that comes down the chimney and leaves gifts for children," she hummed absentmindedly, carefully picking her way through the maze of lights criss crossing through the soft fibers of the carpet underfoot.

His lips curled in displease as she approached. "That's creepy."

This time her laugh was bright, genuine, forming on her lips with an effortlessness that he always seemed to elicit. Life was effortless with him.

"I very much agree," she nodded as she approached, gently brushing off strands of sparkling tinsel sticking to his Christmas sweater that he had insisted match with hers. A 'human couple thing' he had gotten so excited about she couldn't possibly make herself say no.

"Humans are fascinatingly peculiar," he murmured, hand lifting so he could run a warm fingertip down the curve of her ear, hand cascading down her shoulder to come to a rest against her lower back.

"Do you find me peculiar too?" she arched a manicured brow, canting her hand in a playful manner.

Rosy lips formed a soft yet tantalizing smirk. "I find you the essence of perfection in every way, my darling wife."

She rolled her eyes in response though was unable to hide the slight blush that heated her cheeks. His hand moved to slide his fingers through her own, skin velvet soft against callused palms as his eyes searched hers with a sudden soft earnestness.

"Can I show you something outside?" he asked softly.

Warmth blossomed in her chest. "Of course, Cardan."

Immediately he flashed a catlike grin, abandoning the string of lights he had yet to put up in favor of tugging on her hand out the front door. The cold was piercing, powdery snow and dripping icicles glittering in the afternoon sunlight, their breath frosting in ghostly clouds.

"Surprise," he gestured upward with a dramatic flourish and genuine pride. About fifty mistletoe sprigs were hanging from the awning up above, along with velvet bows and scattered silver glitter.

"Vivi told me about your little kissing shrub," he smiled knowingly with glimmering coal eyes, "So if I trap you under it, you owe me your beautiful lips."

A smile crept up her face despite her scoff, the sliver of romantic in her sighing in adoration at her husband. "Fine, dumbass. Lay it on me."

He chuckled softly before gently pulling her into his chest, tail curling against her leg as his lips captured hers in a toe curling kiss, one that made every inch of her come alive wherever they touched. She pushed closer, fingertips weaving through his silky curls as her teeth grazed over his lower lip.

He hummed in satisfaction before breaking away a mere centimeter, breath dancing against the corner of her mouth. "Can we have Christmas every year?"

She huffed. "Only if you behave."

"I'll take that as a yes," he murmured amusedly, lips returning to hers, a warmth there that even the cold of winter couldn't touch.

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court-of-forever-undone · 4 years

Text

How Am I Going To Tell Him?

Jude x Cardan Fan Fiction | | Part 4 of 11

Summary: Jude has been feeling sick for a few days. The flu? Poison? It takes Taryn only a minute to realize the cause: The High Queen is pregnant.

Read on AO3 -> “How Am I Going to Tell Him”

Masterlist

Rating: T

Chapter 4: The Party

An hour into the festivities and the party was in full swing. The pledging ceremony had gone off without a hitch. The new ruler had bowed low before both of them and had pledged loyalty to the crown. Together, they announced the start of the celebration, at which time, many of the guests made themselves well acquainted with the endless flow of wines the palace provided.

Now, Jude and Cardan were circling the room making conversation with important members of the lower courts before it was time to bring out the main feast.

Jude had just finished a conversation with Randalin and a member of the Unseelie, when she noticed Vivi, Heather, Taryn, and Ghost laughing together, with Oak playing at their feet. Jude could not help but notice the way Ghost’s hand lingered on Taryn’s back as he slid her out of the path of a particularly intoxicated guest. Jude had suspected the two were involved for some time but was patiently waiting for her sister to tell her.

Jude could never truly be happy for her sister while she was with Locke, given his true nature and his pleasure in creating stories from those around him; often painful ones. While Valerian enjoyed physical torture, Locke enjoyed playing with emotions. Taryn likely suffered more than she ever shared to be at his side. But seeing the sandy haired spy smiling next to her sister made her feel hopeful.

Jude made her way over to the group to enjoy a moment of unofficial conversation.

“Hi Ju- I mean, Your Highness!” Heather said excitedly. Heather had recently dyed her roots a ghost white which faded into her now bubblegum pink hair. At first glance, one could almost mistake her for a faerie. Almost.

“Hey Heather, I am so glad you could make it!” Jude responded with similar enthusiasm. Vivi and Heather had been able to fully regrow their relationship, and this time, Vivi was honest and much more cautious of the dangers that mortals face around fey. With more stability and ultimately the protection from the crown, Heather had several fun short trips to Faerieland. Although, Jude always made sure to have a member of the Court of Shadows keeping an eye on her in case Vivi got distracted.

“So…” Vivi starts, “has anything interesting happened since we last spoke?” Her sister said while making a not so subtle glance over at Cardan, who appeared to be laughing with Baphen and a few others.

Jude was speechless. She had not expected her sister to so obviously inquire about it so publicly, especially when it had only been a couple of hours since the tests. Jude had planned to find and tell Cardan before the start of the ceremony, but Fan had been unable to locate him.

The silence had gone on too long and Jude could feel the heat rise in her cheeks. Ghost raised an eyebrow at her, attempting to solve the reason for her silence. Even Heather looked to Jude with a happy smile, clearly out of the pregnancy loop. At least Vivi could keep a secret from someone.

“Uhh… Cardan and I are, um, going to be…” Jude struggled to get a lie out. Any lie was better than nothing. Even Oak looked up from his game with a small faerie child, to hear her response.

“Redecorating the throne room,” Taryn says definitively, saving Jude from their stares. “They asked me to help!” The complete lie had seemed to dismiss the attention of a few faeries nearby that had been eavesdropping, but Ghost appeared unconvinced.

“Are you going to put new cushions on the throne? They are awfully uncomfy,” said Oak, now turned back to his game.

A familiar voice came from behind the circle. Cardan’s voice was full of mischief as he spoke, “Hmm, I am not sure. What did we agree upon again, my Queen?” Cardan wore a wicked smirk, knowing full well that they had never made such plans.

Damn faerie hearing, thought Jude. Cardan’s eyes found their way to Jude, who promptly looked down as her skin turned an even darker shade of red.

Cardan continued to peer at his wife curiously, before looking down to Oak. Cardan continued, “And dearest nephew, how is it you know how uncomfortable the throne is? Perhaps you are ready to take the crown?” Cardan’s face still wore a smirk, but this one was much more playful as he spoke to the child.

“No way! I like my classroom. On Fridays we each take a turn at bringing homemade snacks to share. Plus I think I want to go to college!” Oak declared, his face scrunched up with passion.

Cardan laughed. “Alright then. Well, I will see if Taryn can make the throne room more comfortable. When it is finished, you can be the first to test it.” From hearing this, Oak lit up with excitement.

“Okay! But I still don’t have to be king right?” Oak asked.

“Oak!” scolded Taryn, while the rest of the group just laughed, apart from Jude who was preoccupied with her thoughts.

Suddenly, it was announced that the feast was about to start. Everyone began making their way towards the tables that would soon be overflowing with delicacies from the court of honor that evening. With Jude’s never ending morning sickness, she was entirely out of the loop for the planning, thus was just as curious about the contents of the feast as any other guest. Cardan had been working harder than usual to ensure that Jude had an easy week off of her duties. Once he found out she was pregnant, Jude wondered how much he would try to restrict her to resting rather than ruling.

Jude watched as her family made their way to a table nearby, when she felt the High King take her arm, leading her to their head table. “So, the throne room?” he murmured as they took their seats. The mention of her and Taryn’s lie was a reminder of how much easier it would be once Cardan was in the know. But for the rest of the evening, it was best to pretend nothing had changed.

“You have to admit they could be more comfortable,” Jude whispered back. A smile peaked up at the edge of Cardan’s lips.

The thought of the inevitable conversation that night caused sweat to accumulate in her palms. Even if she knew he would be delighted at the news, her brain had been working nonstop to think of potential dangers and issues surrounding having a child. Jude attempted to dry her hands on her dress. With a deep breath, Jude said, “I did actually have something I wanted to talk to you about tonight.” A small jolt of excitement or possibility anxiety jumped through her torso. It was going to be a good thing, she had tried to convince herself.

Jude only had a moment to read the surprised look on Cardan’s face before she was hit in the face with a foul smell that turned her stomach against her in a second.

The kitchen staff had entered the space carrying dozens of trays filled with an assortment of sizzling meats. The smell had filled the room, leaving Jude with nowhere to hide from it.

Jude felt a rise in her throat and knew she needed to leave the room quickly, but saw no graceful exit.

“Cardan.” The desperation in her voice caught his full attention. But before she could continue her plea, a servant placed a full spread directly in front of the pair.

The smell was too much for Jude to ignore. She turned slightly before vomiting all over the ground next to the table.

While most of the party-goers had not initially noticed, those who were nearby or watching the crown looked on in a mix of horror and disgust, causing a wave of more eyes to turn towards the head table.

If there was a graceful way for the High Queen to exit after emptying the contents of her stomach during a celebration, Jude did not find one. Jude ran as quickly as she could manage towards the exit. Servants and guests backed out of her way as she went. Jude heard Cardan quickly declare that the party continue before she felt him catch up behind her.

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laequiem · 4 years

Text

No tricks, only treats [ONESHOT]

/ Cardan and Jude join the rest of the family to enjoy Halloween in the Mortal World.

Part of Tales from the Mortal Realm, a collection of random moments in the lives of the Queen and King of Elfhame.

"Is it strange that I find you attractive dressed as such?"

I was looking at myself in the mirror, assessing my outfit, when Cardan sneaked into the room. His training with The Ghost was paying off, he was as silent as ever.

"Strange? Yes. Surprising? No."

Read it on ao3

"Is it strange that I find you attractive dressed as such?"

I was looking at myself in the mirror, assessing my outfit, when Cardan sneaked into the room. His training with The Ghost was paying off, he was as silent as ever.

"Strange? Yes. Surprising? No."

I saw him prowl towards me through the glass. He slid his arms around my waist, staring at me through my reflection.

Today is October 31st and Oak insisted we join him in celebrating Halloween. Of course, this means we all need costumes. I decided to go as the one character I knew more than anyone else.

Cardan.

I looked through his wardrobe for my outfit. It was quite hard to find a top that was loose enough to account for my breasts, as most of his clothes were tailored to fit him perfectly. I also found a dark blue coat, its collar covered in iridescent feathers. I gave up trying to find pants in his collection, as my hips would never fit, and just wore a pair of black leggings with black combat boots.

"What do you mean, dear Jude?"

"The only thing you love more than booze is yourself."

He raised his brows, making a show of looking offended.

"Your capacity to lie to yourself will always impress me,” he said then plucked a kiss to my temple, “I love you more than I love wine."

I don’t think I will ever get over him being caring . It felt as if he was a completely different person from the boy who would disturb lessons just to get attention.

Cardan turned me to face him, then inspected my face. “Something is missing.” He took my hand and directed me to his personal vanity. He opened the drawer and pulled out some cosmetics. He lined my eyes with kohl and coated my lashes with dark mascara. I suppressed my laugh when I saw he was so concentrated that he had stuck out his tongue. Then, he took out some glittery gold powder and applied it on my cheekbones.

He took a step back to look at his handiwork and smiled.

“And the final touch,” he said as he plucked his crown off his head and put it on my head at an angle, “Voilà!”

I looked at myself in the mirror. I did not bother with any kind of wig. I put my hair up in elaborate braids, letting a few short curls hang in a few places. Yet, even without his signature dark hair, I still looked like him. I made faces at myself in the mirror, trying to get his grin right.

Finally, I got up. “Your turn now, dearest Cardan.”

When Heather learned that Cardan would be coming too, she started suggesting outfits for him. She even went as far as drawing some of them. Something about his otherworldly looks inspired her. Maybe it's the tail, since a lot of her designs included it: a devil, sexy cat man and my personal favorite, a cute puppy.

In the end, I chose my own, petty idea. I walked in the closet and pulled out the outfit I had the servants clean for the occasion.

“A King needs his Queen,” I grinned as I revealed the Queen of Mirth dress and crown.

Cardan threw his head back laughing. “You sure know how to hold a grudge.”

Thankfully, my husband was a team player, and he went with it. Even in this, he looked strikingly handsome. Or pretty, I guess. Unfair.

We landed in Maine in the early afternoon. It was strange to be awake so early, but Cardan did not seem bothered at all. We met up with Vivi, Heather, Oak, Taryn and Garrett at the entrance to FallFest, some kind of harvest festival that was held every October in the local park. It had everything from harvest contests to food stands, a section with typical carnival games, a small hay maze and even a haunted house.

I was not surprised to see my eldest sister dressed up, she went crazy for Halloween every year. Vivienne would dress up for a week straight before Halloween, even when she still lived in Elfhame. She was wearing a tight black bodysuit with a tail and claws as well as a black leather mask with cat ears. Heather dressed up as some kind of … plant lady? She had a short bodysuit made of green ivy leaves, green stockings and a long red wig. Oak was with them, wearing a reddish pink shirt with a big yellow star on it. I can only assume they went for pop-culture references I am unfamiliar with.

The real surprise was seeing my twin Taryn and her quiet lover also dressed up.

"What are you dressed as?", Cardan inquired, cocking his head to the side, "You ought to have dressed as Jude, you have already proved to be so good at it."

I snapped my head at him and slammed my foot as hard as I could on his. He was joking, of course. But the peace between me and Taryn was still fairly new. We mostly kept to ourselves and rarely talked. Garrett was back with the Court of Shadow and we were friendly, but he kept his professional and personal lives completely separated.

Cardan was hopping on one foot, scowling at me like he did not understand why I was upset. Taryn understood, though. She was sheepishly looking at the ground.

"I… I'm sorry for tricking you, Cardan."

I tried finding something to say to end the awkwardness. I wanted Cardan to apologize for what he said, but I knew he would not. Fae don't apologize.

Thankfully, Vivi broke the silence. "C'mon guys, we're here to HAVE FUN!" she complained, "What ARE you two dressed as?"

"Phantom of the Opera." Garrett replied.

"Nerds."

"Says the one dressed up as Catwoman." Garrett mocked.

The bickering continued, though less mean-spirited than Cardan’s original comment, as we walked down the main path. Our first stop was the pumpkin carving station. Each couple got their own pumpkin to carve, though Vivi and Heather’s pumpkin was mostly Oak’s handiwork and the couple making sure he did not stab himself. Taryn and Garrett made some intricate flower design on theirs, Garrett being the one doing the carving of course. As for us, well… Cardan had creative ideas, but no skills with a blade, and my skills were more of the stabbing variety. We settled on giving our pumpkin a traditional jack-o-lantern face.

After the effort of carving pumpkins, we were starving. Oak was complaining, dragging his feet on the ground so much that Vivi and Heathers were holding both of his hands to pull him along. Behind them, I saw Taryn with her arm looped around The Ghost's.

I was suddenly very aware that Cardan and I were the only ones not holding hands.

Nobody knows us here. We needn't keep the appearance of the power couple, together to rule and nothing else.

I took my hand out of the pockets of my borrowed coat and tentatively brushed my fingers against Cardan's hand. I saw him whip his head towards me, and I blushed when I witnessed the surprise in his face. Soon enough, he smiled. One of those smiles he kept for me and only me, blissful and happy. The smile he gives me when we have the time to spend hours cuddled together in bed, enjoying each other's presence.

Cardan took my hand and squeezed. I squeezed back.

We spent the rest of the afternoon eating good food, trying to guess the weight of giant pumpkins and visiting a haunted house. Cardan was fascinated by the weird human traditions and absolutely ecstatic about the food. Pumpkin-spiced flavored food will become the new trend in Elfhame, judging by his reaction.

When the sun started to go down, Taryn and Garrett left for Madoc’s, who decided to try giving out candy to the trick-or-treaters. Heather and Vivienne had initially volunteered to take Oak trick-or-treating himself, but when one of their friends invited them to a party, we offered to take him instead. Oak was excited to spend more time with me and “Uncle Cardan”.

I had not gone trick-or-treating in...10 years? Maybe 12? Since my parents died. Cardan, obviously, had never gone. So, dressed up as each other, with Oak dressed as some cartoon character, we roamed the residential streets of the city to beg for sweets.

“If it is called ‘trick-or-treat’, does that mean I can make bargains if someone refuses to give me candy?” Cardan asked as we watched Oak go up to a house.

I gave him my best ‘I’ll-strangle-you-if-you-do’ stare. “No. No turning people into cats, no curse making them hear imaginary insects buzzing around their ears.”

“Why is it called trick-or-treat, then?”

Vivienne told me they had to explain this to Oak, too, a few weeks ago. Someone at school had mentioned being excited to go trick-or-treating and my brother had been very confused.

“I don’t know.”

Cardan hmmed and smirked, “Perhaps the Folk were involved when the holiday was first established.”

I crossed my arms.

“If that’s the case, not all traditions need to be brought back.”

He laughed at that, then reached around me and pulled me closer to him.

“You win. I won’t trick anyone,” he crooned in my ear, “but I want a kiss for being well behaved.”

I rolled my eyes dramatically. “So needy.”

Once again, I had to remind myself that nobody knows us here. Nobody recognized our costumes today: in the mortal world, dressed as each other, we were only The Guy In An Ugly Dress and Fashionable Emo Boy. Nobody knew we are King and Queen of Elfhame, therefore there are no expectations to be the hedonistic king and his murderous wife.

I slid my hand behind his neck and pulled him down. I felt him smile as I captured his lips with mine.

“Ew, gross!” Oak’s voice came from the other end of the driveway, “Stop that, come here.”

Reluctantly, we pulled away from each other and looked towards the house. Oak was in front of the opened door, talking with a couple.

“Honey, look,” the tallest woman exclaimed as we walked down the driveway, “She’s dressed as High King Cardan!”

“Oh my god,” the other one replied, sounding so very human, “that sounds kind of profane. Do you think he would have her hung for this?”

As I looked at the two women, I realized that Oak had stumbled upon the house of a Fae couple. They saw through his glamour, and he saw through theirs.

“This is my sister Jude,” Oak started, “and this is my Uncle Cardan.”

Both females had gone completely still and were staring at Cardan with wide eyes. Simultaneously, they bowed deeply.

“Forgive us, Your Majesty. We weren’t expecting you.”

“We so rarely see our kind around here,” the shorter one said nervously, “we… wanted to meet who little Oak was with.”

“We have tea, if you would like.”

I dared a glance at Cardan and noticed he seemed amused. Was he delighted to make them uncomfortable?

“That won’t be necessary,” he said as he took my hand, “My wife has us on a tight schedule, we have other houses to visit. Have a nice evening.”

I caught the emphasis on wife and realized they only recognized him as royalty. ‘ Your Majesty ’, singular. I could tell from the two females’ expressions that they also understood their mistake. I felt bad for them knowing they had no ill intent, probably unaware of the situation in Faerie. Yet, I could not help the grin that crept on my face. I worked hard to become High Queen. I fought and killed my way through the ranks, almost dying. Multiple times. I made decisions that will haunt me until the day I die. I am High Queen, and the Folk must know.

“It was nice meeting you,” I say as I take Oak’s hand, “You are welcome to visit us at the palace if you wish.”

My memories from before Faerieland were to blurry, I did not remember getting so much candy. Did Taryn and I get that much? How could we possibly have eaten all of that? Cardan and I each had a smaller bag, only accompanying Oak to some of the doors, but Oak had multiple full bags. Once he went to sleep, Oriana was more than happy to give us some. She had learned how bad candy was for children’s teeth - even little Fae kids. She filled little bags for us to take back to Elfhame.

Like anyone eating candy for the first time, Cardan went a little crazy. He wanted to try everything. Faeries might be different in a lot of ways, but I now have proof that chocolate is addictive even to them.

The High King of Elfhame ate so much candy that he fell asleep on the couch, to the former General’s dismay.

#tfota #the folk of the air #cardan #cardan greenbriar #jurdan #judecardan #jude duarte #the cruel prince #the wicked king #queen of nothing #holly black #fanfic #fluff #laequiem

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