#wait does the wizard go to the cinema?

[sweetcreatortimetravel]

These bitches go to the cinema??

[thepilotanon]

Do you have had canons of Draco with a muggle wife and how he would handle the muggle world and taking care of her in the magic world?

This is going to be changed for Draco having a spouse, instead of a wife, so that all genders can be included!

I would think you probably met when Malfoy went lying low in the Muggle World and you guys had an instant connection, and developed a very close relationship before revealing he's a Wizard and the Wizarding World when you two get serious. You take it very well, and I think you two have a lot of fun teaching each other about your ways of life and customs and differences.

As I have said before, Malfoy is extremely protective of his partner from his parents - I think this gets tenfold when you're a Muggle and get married. I think Malfoy kinda goes low contact with his parents for a bit, but you still encourage sending letters and offers to make dinners and holidays (Malfoy can't help but smile sadly when you ask if his parents would like this or that for their birthdays/anniversaries). Once Malfoy takes over the manor, I would think Lucius and Narcissa start to accept your "place" in the family.

I think it would be cute if you and Malfoy start off in an apartment in the Muggle World, and you have a rule that he isn't allowed to use magic to do chores. You catch him enchanting the laundry to fold themselves and you call him out, and he looks like a child caught with a cookie before dinner. It does come in handy when the heater or AC breaks down, and Malfoy flat out refuses to freeze/melt while waiting for someone (and has to pay!) to fix it when he can just flick his wand.

You get Malfoy into going to the cinemas and watching some sports (he's impressed by how Muggles will tackle each other on the ground, instead of the air). He likes reading Muggle's interpretations of wizards, magical creatures, and fairy tales and hearing folklore from your childhood and your imagination. You absolutely love the crazy candies from his world, and can never stop looking at the shop windows with enchanted pieces and seeing kids playing Gobstones and watching Quidditch. How cute would it be for Malfoy to take you on date-nights with broom -riding, since you can't?

[sodamnradd]

Dramione prompt: draco secretly loves muggle movies

Thank you for the prompt, Anon! Thoroughly enjoyed writing this one. (Includes The Notebook spoilers).

The sixth time he asks her out, they’re in line at the canteen, waiting to fill paper cups with medium roast coffee and two-percent milk. Hermione recognizes his scent before he opens his mouth, the only wizard who affords her zero personal space. 

The coffee carafe sputters out, nothing left for the irritating shadow that seldom leaves her alone. Good.

“Just one date.” He abandons his hollow cup to follow her. 

She slaps a lid on hers. “Fine.”

Malfoy’s face lights up. “I’ll make reservations at—”

“I want to go to the movies,” she says. 

“The what?” 

“The Muggle cinema. Dark room. Big screen. Riveting entertainment.” She blows into the opening of her cup, rich steam wafting beneath her nostrils. “No wizarding folk around.”

His hesitation confirms her suspicions. 

“Forget it then.” She walks around him.

He blocks her path. “Friday night?”

She purses her lips. “No dinner beforehand or drinks at Leaky.”

“Be ready at seven.”

Malfoy picks her up wearing a Muggle suit and a nervous smile. When he buys their tickets at the counter, his wallet is stuffed with crisp fifty-pound notes fresh from the teller. She picks The Notebook. He buys popcorn with extra butter, fizzy drinks, and no fewer than five chocolate bars.

“My armrest’s sticky,” says Malfoy the moment they sit down. “And this popped corn is mushy.”

“You asked for extra butter.” She tosses a few into her mouth. “Try shaking the bag.”

He spills a heap onto his trousers. “This is barbaric.”

There’s no shutting him up.

“Granger, I’m allergic to this beverage. It’s tingling my throat.”

“Why does it have to be so loud and dark?”

“Really, a movie about a book?”

“We’re not going to watch old people shag, are we?”

At some point, he stops talking. 

Mid-way through the film, he’s leaned forward, elbows on his knees, watching the screen with huge eyes. 

When it’s revealed that Allie has dementia and has forgotten Noah, a teardrop rolls down his cheek. 

When Allie chooses Noah, Malfoy reclines with a sigh. 

When the credits roll, and everyone exits the theatre misty-eyed and moved to silence, he reaches for her hand.

“What did you think?” she asks over the drone of evening traffic. 

He eyes the movie posters outside the building. “These are showing in there?”

“Yes.”

“Want to see another one next week?”

She’s baffled. “Nobody will see us.” 

He shoots her an odd look. “You want people to see us?”

“I know you’re going out with me to fix your public image.”

Realization dawns on his face. “Is that why you kept rejecting me?”

“Why else would you ask me out?” She raises her arm to hail a taxi.

“How many times have I asked you out?” He follows her. “I sat in a filthy seat at a Muggle theatre and ate soggy corn.”

She sighs. “You don’t even know me properly.”

He catches her hand before she opens the car door. “Did I do something to offend you tonight?”

“No.”

“What do you want me to do?” The sincerity in his face makes her pause. “I’ll do anything you want.”

She falters. 

He shoos the taxi away and speaks over her protests. “Let me take you out again. That Spiderman fellow looks intriguing.” 

Their hands are still intertwined, sturdy fingers warm over her knuckles. Nobody’s ever looked at her this way before. Nobody’s ever been this stubborn about being with her.

She advances down the footpath, her hand slipping from his.

His eyes screw shut, shoulders slumping.

She catches his sleeve before he lowers his arm. “Walk me home?”

(600 words)

I write a dramione drabble once a week, send me your prompts here.

[wistfulrat]

a 4-part rec list of my fave drarry fics - the thrillers, dramas, soft bois, and wankbanks getting me through 2020′s shitstorm

[the soft boi list is here and truly i’m not surprised this rec is going to be the longest bc if there’s one thing a bitch is going to do, it’s yearn.

as always! if you love a fic, follow the authors, leave kudos & comments, send them nice msgs bc free art is still labor xoxo]

part 3: soft bois

mood: for when I need respite, a balm to the all-consuming shittiness of life

includes: fluff, comfort, low-stakes, slow-burn fics. a wistful look, a rainy morning, an unexpected grace, a stupidly disarming joke. i could live inside these fics. the smallness of human lives removed from the site of that which hurts & irreparably changes. the story-equivalent of a deep breath after a long day. pregnant silences & pensive mundanity & shy smiles. banter with bite but without the cruelty. the color lavender. weirdly whimsical. soft fics are not necessarily conflict-averse (no drarry fic rly can be, considering the context) but, they offer the reader a generous distance from the initial harm. they’re the quiet cleaning up after a storm. sometimes healing is an exacting surgical knife and other times it’s a slow scabbing. you read these fics to be reassured that the way forward is not always ruthless. and honestly?? they deserve a semblance of peace godDAMmit.

The Way Down by @letteredlettered - 65k - T “and I thought that if someone talked to you as though you were a human being you might—maybe you could act like one” --the way i think about this line daily. the characterization of draco in this fic is one my favorites bc he’s earnest and neurotic and tired of harry’s shit. which is to say, he cares so so much. and harry doesn’t know what to do with that bc he’s got a monster in his chest and lives as a recluse. but they both humanize each other in ways no one else can. “you’re just a person” has to be some kind of drarry ethics of belonging and it makes me CRY. -

Little Deaths and How to Avoid Them by @greaseonmymouth and dustmouth - 96k - T “Maybe it’s not about deserving it? Maybe you just get to have it anyway. . .I’m allowing myself to want something and to let myself have it and to fight for it.” --harry runs a daycare and also works at a library. draco spends a lot of time in said library. they bond over sci-fi books and therapy anecdotes and quiet philosophical conversations held over cafeteria soup. and harry’s struggling to understand his asexuality. draco’s learning how to live with anxiety and depression. they both want to be deserving of love. incredible fic with beautiful art by dustmouth. - 

Open for Repairs by @drarrytrash - 35k - T “A few leaves rustle in the gutter and the muggle world pays no mind to them, to two lost boys holding on for dear life.” --all of their fics feel exactly like this. like you’ve been allowed to look at something private, tender, unexpected. draco, known abba fan, is a repairman in the muggle world & harry can’t stop breaking thrifted things in order to see him? say less, i'm thERE. also “I think I have a crush on you” goddddd  - other faves by them: Counting Down By Ten - 2k - T: draco’s stepped outside of the party for a smoke. harry follows him bc of course he does. i could read this 100 times and not get tired of it. - Clouds That Veil the Midnight Moon - 36k - E: FUCKING HILARIOUS I CACKLED THROUGH THE WHOLE THING. draco’s wolfy problem and harry helping him and harry being flustered by how much he likes draco and draco’s hot heroic moment. shutup it’s perfect. “He almost asks if Draco ever gets tired of being a miserable complaining shit all the time, but he knows that he, personally, never ever gets tired of being a miserable complaining shit.” and “It’s the traumas,” Harry says gravely” --lines that live rent free in my head -

Harry Potter and the Future He Doesn't Really Want, Thanks by seefin - 70k - E “That was the only logical thing to do here, wasn’t it? It was the next step, it was the end of hurting each other and the beginning of the exact opposite.” --harry lives with luna and neville and also he dreams about the future sometimes? and he keeps running into draco. draco thinks this is sus as hell, until he doesn’t. feat. taxi rides, museums, cinemas, rooftop conversations beneath a lunar eclipse, mid-sex innocuous banter, draco and harry discussing nicki minaj. this fic charmed my ass off. seefin writes the most effortlessly hilarious dialogues. i smiled at my phone like an idiot at least 7 times. -  other faves by them: Wild - 93k - E: “he liked feeling needed, for the things that he was needed for back at the house in Ireland. For cooking and gardening and driving. Easy things.” --this shit makes me cry it’s so good. harry lives in Ireland with these three brilliant, hilarious, wandless witches and draco’s a potions student who's come to study under one of the housemates and the boys have so much shit to work through but their love becomes so tender and honest. draco yells at harry a lot and harry lets him and they both keep each other grounded in something real and fuCK.  - Divination for Dickheads - 7k - G: “I’m terrible at having crushes. I’ve never played anything cool a day in my life.” -- oh harry, we knOW. a bus ride, a fortune teller, an aquarium birthday party. god i love this fic. -

Modern Love by @tackytigerfic​ - 61k - E “But we’ve worked so hard at this, haven’t we? Yeah, I know it’s a horror to have to talk about it, but fuck it. We’re friends now, but it took so long to get here. Have you ever had to work so hard at something before?" --the steady blossoming of their friendship in this fic is so goddamn beautiful i want to yell. it’s draco and harry learning to trust each other and the whole thing unfolds so slowly, in this whimsical mix of london streets, wizarding politics, church halls feat. a Hot vicar, and a magical antique shop owner who’s married to literal poseidon?? goD the environment of this fic. immaculate. [also there’s a tender shower scene that makes me cry every single fucking time so if you read this fic pls dm me so we can be embarrassing about it together tbh] -

Nice Things by aideomai - 22k - M “He kept waiting for the weird shock of touch to not knock him clean out of his head, leave him quiet and warm and happy.” --8th year. harry forms an unlikely friendship with draco that begins with smoking weed on a windowsill. harry is touch-starved and draco touches him like he touches all his close friends - like it’s easy. the quiet affection in this fic, the way harry burrows himself into touch bc he’s been without it for his entire life. reading this is like being held. -

Running On Air by @tinyhistory​ - 74k - T “do you remember when we were eleven?” --alexa play coldplay’s the scientist it’s sad girl hours and we’re about to fucking yearn. you’ve seen this fic rec on every drarry list under the sun and i'm here to be redundant. the hype is so goddamn real. this story is a lyrical masterpiece held together by lines that act as refrains that will rattle around your brain until you die, probably. draco’s been missing for 3yrs. harry goes to find him. it’s their odyssey of homecoming. -

Title of Their Sex Tape by @cibeewastaken - 12k - T “But Draco, Draco was everything but boring. Draco made sitting in the rain watching an empty house fun.” --auror partners pining and draco being eccentric and harry being very earnestly gay about draco’s eccentricities!! god this fic is so genuinely fun skskd feat. undercover missions, murderous faeries, a book heist, a stunning navy dress, harry’s eyelashes. -

How We Throw Our Shadows Down by @thistle-verse - 14k - T “Draco is about to say something else— to thank Potter for what he’d done, however poorly— but Harry is smiling at him again, and it’s so soft and perfect that Draco holds in any inadequate words, lest he spoil it.” --draco collects tea cozies and of course harry has the one he wants. the sad and tender gays are at it again feat. conversations in the rain at a train station, melancholy Blaise, muggle photos, wizarding e-bay, the Dursleys.  -

Helix by Saras_Girl - 92k - E “Draco sighs in his sleep and Harry clings on to consciousness, needing to hold on, to give this tiny, insignificant moment the attention it deserves” --I think maybe you can describe every soft Saras_Girl story as giving tiny, insignificant moments the attention they deserve. like, this is an 8th year fic about snails and it’s full of whimsy, grief, compassion, and easy humor. an absolute must-read author in this genre if you want languorous, episodic fics full of distinct OCs and affectionate creatures. - other faves by them: Light up the Night Sky - 98k - M “Draco, sometimes you make my head feel like soup” --the one where harry is a fireworks artist and has a pet chameleon named ken. draco is on the wizarding arts council. they both pine like hell. - Headlights in the Snow - 71k - M “they stare at each other in silence, Harry’s heart beating so loud in his chest that he thinks the biddies must be able to hear it over the sound of their card game.” --the one where draco drives the knight bus and carts around the biddy club, a group of rambunctious old ladies who knit and drink tea and gossip. harry can’t help but fall in love with the everything about this. -

Follow the Water by @xanthippe74 - 38k - T “Harry’s heavy thoughts lift at the sight, like dark clouds blown away from the sun by the wind. The tent doesn’t feel so cramped and stifling now. It feels cozy. And safe. It’s the same feeling that Harry gets when he’s at the Burrow for Sunday roasts, when a group of people who care for each other deeply are crammed into too-small a space.” --harry wanders to the lovegood house on a sunday afternoon. he’s baffled to see that luna’s taken pansy, greg, and draco under her wing. what follows is a summer of forest walks, scavenger hunts, gardening, water fights, odd cakes, faerie rings, and picnics. so many picnics. i love the pace of this fic, the innocent return to childhood things, the way luna brings out the best in all her friends. reluctantly soft slytherins are just *chefs kiss*!! -

Going Postal (A 125pg comic) by dustmouth - T what. a. beautiful. ass. comic. the wizarding fashion, the textures, the character design!! harry travels a lot for his job as a resourcer. draco works in the regulations dept. they pine like a bunch of lovesick idiots via field report notes. god i love dustmouth’s art. -

All the Earnest Young Men by @tepre​ - 29k - E “Draco is twenty-seven layers of personality wrapped up in drama and humour, and a wit so sharp it still stings when he doesn’t see it coming. But there is something below that, too. Something that makes Harry ache just looking at him.” --the way i would lay down my little life for tepre’s characterization of draco, whom invented the word earnest. he’s a magical art theory expert and portraits are disappearing all over London and harry’s the auror assigned to this case. and well. they’re both so very avoidant about how gay they are for each other and it’s like!! shutup and kiss!! which they do in fact, shutup and kiss.  -

Trenches by sara_holmes - 3k - M “Somewhere in the distant part of his mind that hasn't frozen solid, he thinks that maybe he and Draco are about to become more than auror partners, smoking buddies, wine-mates and co-inhabitants of a snow filled trench somewhere in western Scotland.” --the plot line here is literally “it’s cold and i need a fucking cigarette” but let me tell you how I never tire of the shared loaded-silences of two emotionally repressed gays. -

The Years Before Love by lomonaaeren - 13k - M “That’s one of the meanings of peace, he thinks, as Hermione hugs him...That he can do things slowly, softly, without worrying that they won’t be there tomorrow.” --andromeda taking harry under her wing and harry finding solace in teddy. narcissa and draco showing up and the tentative relationships that slowly develop in the quiet calm of andromeda’s house. found families and kisses in the snow and special xmas gifts ugh what’s not to love -

The Moon Looks Lovely Tonight by Omi_Ohmy - 35k - M “I want this to be a house where people are welcome, where they don’t have to be any one way or another” --in which harry collects lost things--owls, best friends, inept bakers, potions experimenters--and turns the mausoleum that is grimmauld place into a home. feat. your fave drarry tropes like shared-beds and reluctant waltzing partners. -

[part 1: thrillers | part 2: dramas | part 3: soft bois | part 4: wankbanks]

[sweetbuckybarnes]

Leave Excalibur alone. The fate of everyone you love rests upon it.

Pairings: Captain Killian Jones + Emma Swan

Summary: What if Emma never united the swords, and left it alone as Merlin told her to?

As the heroes (and villains as Killian put it) stand in Granny's, waiting for Emma to unite the blades finally.

However, Emma starts hearing a voice in her hand, the same voice she was spoken to as a young 6-year-old in Boston.

'Leave Excalibur alone. The fate of everyone you love rests upon it.'

As Emma made the flame and held the two ends of the sword together, the words echoed in her head.

She then set the two ends down and shook her head. "No, I'm not going to do it," she backtracks some and does a turnaround.

"What are you talking about Emma? It's the only way to get rid of the darkness," Snow walked closer to her darkened daughter.

"If there's anything I have learnt from Storybrooke, there's more than one way," Emma said, the hood of her white cape swinging along with her steps.

Killian started to shake his head, knowing what Emma was thinking. "I'm not losing you, Emma," Killian had never been scared of the 'dark swan'.

"But long before any of this, someone told me not to touch Excalibur, and to leave it alone," Emma said, as Killian wrapped his arms around her.

Emma knew Merlin was starting to smile. "Who was it?" Henry asked, looking up at his darkened birth mother.

Emma raised a finger and pointed to Merlin. "In the cinema, in Boston, 1989, I think it was. I watched The Sword in the Stone, and there was an usher who told me not to take the sword out of the stone," Emma smiled at Merlin, purposefully leaving out the part to do with her stealing a chocolate bar.

Merlin smiled. "I can see you're taking my advice," he smiled, and took Excalibur in his hand, as Regina grabbed the dagger.

"The most powerful wizard in the world? I'm going to have to!" Emma laughed, letting a smile blossom over her face.

Merlin gave her a smile and nodded. "You know what I'm going to do?" Emma asked, looking up at Merlin.

-Storybrooke, Maine, United States of America-

A huge earthquake (which is only felt in town), making signs rattle and car alarms start, as people crash-land on the floor of Granny's Diner.

Two of the five dwarfs that we left behind came running in if Killian had to guess - Sneezy and Bashful? and looked at the group on the ground.

"How long have we been gone?" Regina asked as Robin helped her off the ground.

A pair of heels clicked on the ground, as a light swan came around the corner. Their Saviour, light magic, Emma Swan.

"It was 6 weeks," she had a dress similar to the white one she wore in Camelot, but Killian could see the resemblance to the dress she wore on their first date.

"MOM!" Henry smiled widely, seeing his birth mother back to normal. He stood up quickly and went running to collapse in her arms.

Emma knew that Henry would be heartbroken with what would happen, so she wanted to tell him lightly. "Henry, I wouldn't," Emma softly said, as her son came to a stop.

"What do you mean, Emma?" Snow spoke up, with David's arms wrapped around her, making sure she's ok, with their son wrapped in Snow's tight arms.

Emma let out a sigh, and looked over at Henry, holding her hand out like a high five. "Go on, kid," as that left her mouth, Henry reached out with his own hand, as his fingertips slipped through hers without a flinch from Emma.

"What the hell happened in Camelot?" Killian spoke up, walking over to Henry, who was looking between his hand and Emma's.

"This is why I sent you back. Before you could stop me," Emma admitted, as tears welled up. "It's not something I would have wanted you to see, especially you, Henry," Emma looked down at her son, who had started to crumble into a seat.

Killian knew what she was talking about. "It ended with you, didn't it?" He asked, his heartbreaking. Emma is his happy ending, and now she was gone forever.

With a nod of her head, Snow White let out a sob and collapsed again David, they'd lost their daughter, their firstborn, their baby girl. "Emma," Snow's broken voice drew Emma away from Killian and to her parents.

"Look after him, raise him like you would have for me," Emma smiles tightly, and a couple of lightbulbs went off in her head. "I've met my grandparents. All four of them," she smiles as her parents look up at her. "They say hi, they were watching over me, making sure I didn't make any stupid decisions, maybe that why what I did in Camelot happened," she looked at the ground.

"I'm so glad you got to meet them, Emma," David smiles, remembering his mother and her loving nature.

Emma then looks at Regina. "Graham's alright," the former Evil Queen looked shocked. "He forgives you, and I've been demoted!" She exclaimed, pouting as she explains to Robin, Killian and her father that Graham was the Sheriff prior to her.

She then looks at Henry, remembers the shock she felt, seeing her favourite celebrity in the Underworld. "You want to know who's down there with me, kid?" She asks, who looked up and raised an eyebrow. "The King of Queen. Freddie," she smiles as a large grin takes over Henry's face.

The chat for a short while, about Freddie, and then Emma turns to Killian. "I've met Milah," Emma watches as an unfamiliar glaze goes over Killian's eyes, something she's never seen before with her. "Nice woman, I can see why you loved her," Emma couldn't help but feel a bit broken when she saw a tear roll down his cheek, like he gave up on his quest for vengeance was never over, not until she was out of the picture.

Then she felt an unfamiliar tingle throughout her body, she was going back. "It's time for me to go," Emma said, as a bright light overtook the dinner, leaving behind four notes.

Regina, My Parents, Henry and Killian.

"How sentimental," Zelena sneered, and with a flick of Regina's hand, the sister was back in her cell. 

Regina, There's a lot to say to one person, and the most I can say to you is that I sincerely thank you for taking Henry in and adopting him. I know I could never have raised him the way you have. You may believe yourself to be a "villain", but take one look at our son, the way he acts. That's all you.

Thanks for raising him, and making him the young man I believed him to be, Emma. 

Mom and Dad, I don't know what I could ever say to you, other than I'm sorry. I'm sorry for turning into a dark one, I'm sorry for not forgiving you right away after I found out about Lily and Maleficent. Raise my baby brother the way I know you both wished to have raised me.

I hope you know that I loved you both so much, Forever your little girl, Princess Emma of Mistheaven.

Reading Emma's true title, made Snow White sob so much, holding her son close to her, as another small piece of paper drifted to the floor.

Hey there, I'm your big sister Emma, You may not know who I am, or why you only have a letter and no memories of me. I'm sure mom and dad will tell you millions of stories about me, saving our town from curses, villains and a long trip to a place called Neverland. This is your town, and I'll be watching you so you don't make any stupid mistakes, maybe knock a book or two (just to freak mom and dad out). But, if I could have, I'd be helping you grow up, along with mom and dad, and Henry, and Regina, Robin, Killian, you know. The whole town.

I love you, little Prince, Your big sister, Emma. 

Henry, Kid, I hope you know that I would never leave you behind with these crazies for anything. Sorry, you had to go down to one mom, by you will be fine, believe me. I'll always be watching you (always watching, Mike Wazowski).

I love you more than ever, and if I had to do everything all over again, letting you go the day you were born. I would. Because you came back for me, and we have a family.

Keep an eye on Killian for me, kid? You're my only hope, Mom. 

Killian, Oh my devilishly handsome pirate, you'll always be my pirate, the one I met under a pile of bodies in the Enchanted Forest. Sure, we had a rocky start and all, but it got us where we are. Deliriously in love, crazy about the other, with a house to share. If I'm being honest with myself, I've probably loved you since the second I laid eyes on you. I was just too stupid and insecure to admit it. (Plus my walls were about 4 miles high, miles? Ask Henry).

But, you're the one that I will forever struggle to say "goodbye" to. I've never liked goodbyes, I've always hated them. But I'd say a million goodbyes if I get to say a million and one hellos to you.

There will never be enough words in the galaxy for how much I love you, and how much I wish I could turn back time and make sure we got together sooner.

I love you more than life itself, please don't spend 300 years trying to avenge me, as you did for Milah, be happy (move on, if you must) and I'll see you later, ok, baby?

I'll see you later in life when we're both in death (and don't do it yourself, because I will come up and murder you), because we're going to live forever and have a happy life.

I'll forever be yours, Your Swan, the Pirate Queen.

[aevyk-ing]

ROTT vs No Way Home

After seeing No Way Home yesterday, I left the cinema with a bittersweet feeling. It’s a good movie, it’s a good Spiderman movie, but there were some elements strangely similar to ROTT. I’m sure I was the only one in the whole cinema that has seen both movies and the parallels, but overall it was just distracting. I’m going to compare several scenes and themes and other scenes that helped Spiderman’s story. Spoilers ahead:

-Peter vs Jim: Peter (the main one) had a slow breakdown until he forced the situation and visited Strange. He then tries to save everyone and loses Aunt May, what causes him to have a bigger breakdown. This pivotal point is were he stops and listens and even though he lets his rage slip, he manages to do the sacrifice so at least his friends can have the lives they deserve. Forgetting him only erases their relationships, but none of their talents (Ned is still a wizard, for example) nor development and Peter is still Spiderman because he knows that’s who he is, that he’ll be fighting his whole life for justice and helping others.

-Strange vs Douxie: Both acknowledge the problems that kind of spell could do. Strange is an adult that has seen and do terrible things and he’s not afraid of standing up to Peter and make him understand how dangerous is to play with time. He ends up literally doing what Peter asks him to do in the first part and kind of saves the whole multiverse from destruction. 

-Portal use: Ned discovers he can make portals, so of course I have to compare that to the minimal number of portals Claire did in the movie, saying she was “spent” a lot of times. The portals here have a creative use in battle too, but also serve to find allies. 

-The deaths: The only important death is not forced and is given the treatment it deserves. Peter has to learn he can’t save everybody and he’s given time to mourn and seek revenge and continue with his life. Both Ned and MJ almost die but are saved at the last minute. Thanks to Ned’s development and who saves MJ, the story still works.

-The interrogation scene: While it was done better in ROTT (yay?), we see all the characters behaving like they should. There’s minimal comedy and it’s not forced.

-The train fight: Both are equally good.

-Ned vs Toby: Ned gave me huge Toby vibes and even though he’s the sidekick and have some jokes, none of them were of bad taste. We saw Toby screwing up and complaining all the time just to die like a hero and then have a destiny that wasn’t his shoved in his hands. 

-The reunion: There was something sweet and intriguing in the cafe scene. Pauses, looks, the feeling something is odd. I don’t like Peter and MJ as much as I like Jlaire, but life went on and Peter was happy for MJ and Ned and knows it’s going to take some time, but he’ll try to reconnect with them and, who knows, talk again to Strange to see if at least they can recover their memories.

-The sacrifice: For Peter, the world is coming to an end. They have fight and win, but doing the right thing is causing the whole universe to collapse. He knows he can’t change Strange’s spell. He says goodbye and they wait together. He knows he won’t get Aunt May back and he’ll lose his most meaningful relationships. But he does that for the good of all. Compare that to winning and just having to deal with some deaths. And here’s where Garfield’s Peter comes in. He had to dealt with Gwen’s death. He was in a dark place. But he’s still Spiderman, he’s still fighting. 

-The little things: Not only the main character’s stories ended giving us a feeling of hope. I would never have thought that having Maguire’s and Garfield’s Spidermans would also mean finishing their stories. We learn that Maguire’s Spiderman is happy with Mary Jane. We learn that Garfield’s Spiderman went through a dark phase and then he had the chance to save MJ. Every character, each one of them, had a chance to shine. Even the villains. It’s hard to do a movie with several villains, look at what happened to Amazing Spiderman 2, but while it’s hard, it’s doable. 

-The future: Life goes on. We see Peter’s plans. He’s going to live on his own. We don’t know if he’ll leave his friends for a while or not but we somehow know he’ll be alright. He’ll be Spiderman. He’ll do what he always do. And that’s enough to make you feel good towards that ending. 

PS: But seriously, how did they managed to coincide that much?

EDIT: Adding a new one after some days.

-Hope: Another part of why the ending feels hopeful it’s because we know that of course there’s going to be more. Marvel movies aren’t going to stop coming, so we could learn soon what will happen to Peter Parker. We won’t have a full Spiderman movie for some years, but he can appear in other movies, even indirectly! Sadly, that’s not the case with TOA, at least by now. They’ve left us in the dark, in the uncertainty, in the bitter part of that bittersweet ending. And that’s why it hurts so much.

[cadaceus]

C2E138

This was another short episode that had so much packed into it. I was literally on the edge of my seat the whole time, and it really does feel like it is ramping up to something big. My full spoilery liveblogs for Campaign 2, Episode 138 are down below but be forewarned that there are many capital letters because... yes, I got excited. MULTIPLE TIMES.  Can we time travel to next Thursday please?

- I came in one minute late and the Nordverse is going wild, Chosen One Travis never fails to make me laugh! (also *harp music* Laura Bailey~)

- I know it makes sense for it to be the end of the Campaign but it will still make me slightly sad every time he says it  😭

- “Cree Deeproots” ooh we’re getting Cree lore?  👀

- ROLLING INIATIVE RIGHT OFF THE BAT OH GOD

- 60 POINTS OF DAMAGE?? LET’S GOOO VETH

- Extort Truth?? Have we seen Beau use this ability before? Either way, that’s super cool

- Empire Sibs picking up on Cree telepathically saying “Nonagon, help me” I am both terrified but also kind of sad, I almost don’t want her to die?  😭

- WHAT DOES VESSEL OF THE PATTERN MEAN OH GOD DGVHFDJNKLDFL EVIL AVATAR STATE WAIT WHAT TF IS HAPPENING WHY IS SHE GROWING A WEIRD MONSTER BODY

- You know what, I take it back, y’all can kill Cree now because uhhhh ruh roh

- Everyone: battling scary monsters, having moral conflicts over killing Cree Meanwhile, Widojest in the corner:  💃 (I know what they’re doing is important but the difference made me laugh lol!)

- God, Matt is so good at describing things--the way he described Cree’s face in the creature is so amazing yet spooky

- “Read in books” Or read in one specific book... that may have given them eyes...  and powers similar to what Cree is experiencing? 👀

- My heart skips a beat any time Beauyasha call each other baby <3

- HOW DO YOU WANT TO DO THIS VETH THE BRAVE?

- DUNAMANCY!!! Immovable Object was so clever, oh my god, Caleb I love you

- FJORD VETH AND ESSEK HAVE RED EYES IS THAT WHAT THE WIS SAVE IS RUH ROH 

- EVERYONE HAS AN EYE?!?! (except for Jester and Yasha, okay... I wonder how much of a role these eyes will have beyond just like... creepy aesthetic value and seemingly okay powers)

- All of them having Telepathy with each other (minus Jester and Yasha) is actually quite badass

- Essek finally admitting he’s hurt and then Matt RE emphasizing it later   😭 Heal my neutral evil NPC

- ESSEK SUGGESTING TIME TRAVEL I WILL FINALLY GET MY TIME TRAVEL ARC IF ITS THE LAST THING I DO 

- “We’re on what is essentially the largest Cadaver in history, I was born to put this shit down” CADUCEUS GO OFF, this gave me chills

- “Like I deserve all of the things that haunt me” it’s true but it makes me sad anyways

- Yes my internet cut out the first time around watching this, yes I am watching the rerun at 2am, don’t worry about it :P

- ESSEK’S NATURAL 20 I KNEW HE WOULD GET THERE EVENTUALLY AND THE FACT THAT IT’S ON A ROLL THAT COMBINES HIS PAST RESEARCH ON TIME TRAVEL WITH HELPING HIS FRIENDS....... POETIC CINEMA DARE I SAY

- it worked!!!!!!

- Mind Blank danggg! That is a smart choice I think!

- I’m glad Yussa is alive(? okay?) but big Yikes to Beau getting sliced!

- Gaudius seems so pleasant which makes them CREEPIER, also the politics of the Cognouza are so interesting, like the different relationships between everyone, I’m so curious

- YUSSA WITH A HOLE IN HIS FACE RUH ROH

- Caleb Banishing Yussa, thank goodness... also Caleb is being so Good with spells today what’s sexier than wizards....

- Beau et al. willing the flesh tunnel into existence... this place is almost like creepy body horror Alice in Wonderland?

- a FOURTH eye on caleb  😭 😭

- “Nine pulsating orbs” Are these orbs Luxon beacons or something else???

- I know the Somnovem are saying important things right now but I’m just so entranced by Matt’s voice

- Proto realm? Hmmmmmm “About to be born” don’t like that either

- LUCIEN???

- NOT A FLESH THRONE. HOLY SHIT. HIS AESTHETICS ARE ON POINT I’LL GIVE HIM THAT

- I keep expecting Matt to end the episode but I don’t want it to end dfgfhjkl

- WHAT HAPPENED WITH THE INTUIT CHARGES HELLO????

- Another short episode this week! (Funny that we can call three hours as “short”!) But oh my goodness this was such a good episode, and I was on my toes for so much of it... I genuinely feel like I’m about to go FERAL over here because we got: Almost all of the Mighty Nein (including Essek) with eyes, Cree battle/death, time travel, Somnovem lore, freeing Yussa,Lucien doing whatever tf he just did.... this is gonna be a lot to process

- BUT until next week... I love you all so very very much. Is it Thursday yet?

[ofmermaidsandmarauders]

the road less taken looks real good now

hope you enjoy this attempt at taylor swift/evermore inspired Jily smut!!

read on AO3 or FFN

If you had asked Lily where she thought she would see James Potter again, the last place she would have said was running into him as she turned the corner on her way to the little market next to the cinema. And yet, he was exactly who she collided with, his arms catching her just before she fell back and her bottom landed on the hard cement.

"Alright, Evans?" His cheeky grin and rosy cheeks drew her attention first, her eyes then sliding up that slightly crooked nose to meet his gaze. It was cold outside, but that wasn't what caused the shiver that ran down her spine, his eyes alight with that same mischievousness they held when she first met James at eleven years old, almost ten years ago now.

"Yeah, I'm just fine," she reassured him softly as her hands gave his shoulders a slight squeeze, "thank you."

'It's… wow. It's really good to see you," James admitted, the right side of his mouth lifting just a little higher than the left as his gaze raked over her body, setting her upright so his arms could fall pathetically back to his sides. "Like, really good to see you."

Lily thought of that night after graduation, the memory of their legs curled together under her bed sheets causing another chill to run down her spine. They had agreed to keep in touch, explore where this future between them could go, but then apprenticeships and family needs cropped up, too much time and space passed and the idea of James and Lily finding a future together had passed by, a missed opportunity.

Looking up at James' warm smile and tall stature, she wondered for a brief moment what their lives would have been like should they have traveled that road together. Would she be feeling so lonely this holiday season? Or would there have been a happier alternative in her path?

"It's good to see you too, James. I was just nipping over to the market for a few items to make Christmas cookies while I'm home for the holidays. Wait, wait, wait…" Lily paused, not even noticing that they had picked up their paces, walking towards the market as if on autopilot together. "What are you doing here in Bamburgh?"

James peered down at her, shoving his hands into his pockets as he pondered over his answer.

"My parents passed away about eight years ago now. Usually I spend the holidays with the lads, or with Remus' family, or just with Sirius, but with the two of them finally getting their shit together and coupling up, it felt a bit more like intruding. My parents always had a little cabin out this way on the coast, but we never visited much. I remembered coming here as a young boy and thought I'd try to clean it up and just have a solitary Christmas."

"Oh." This was the only thing Lily could think of to say, her mind going blank as she tried to process the fact that James Potter's family had owned a home in her small town, and yet the two had never run into one another until that day on the Hogwarts Express, his little body barrelling into hers at lightning speed. Her mouth quirked up at the memory and she peered up at him now. No, he was no longer that little boy. He was not even that boy of eighteen, the one who had whispered sweet nothings into her ear and promised her the world if they could just find a way to make it work.

She had always assumed that if he had meant what he said, he'd have found a way to make it work. Her own insecurities had interfered in her own efforts, causing her to wait patiently until she had to finally accept that James hadn't truly felt as strongly as she had led herself to believe.

And that was okay. Lily had moved on after a little time licking her wounds. The rejection had only stung for a short while.

"Hey, I have to head back but… you should stop by later if you've got some extra Christmas cookies," James told her, his hand reaching up to gently hold her elbow, guiding her to face him once again. "And just because I'd really like to see you again."

"A-alright," Lily stammered, surprising herself by her own quick agreement. "I'd really like that too."

"Great, hold on. Let me just…" James maneuvered and dug around in his pockets until he found some scrap of paper in his wallet, his mouth moving silently as an address slowly etched itself on the little white scrap. He handed it over with a cheeky grin, his impressive display of wandless magic completed.

"I'll be by later this evening," Lily told him, fingers grazing his own as she took the slip of paper, pocketing it slowly. She hadn't been expecting the warm zing of pleasure that shot up her arm just from their fingers brushing together in the cold.

James backed away, grinning brightly as he rounded the corner once more and she was able to head towards the market once more, her mind now cloudy with thoughts of what ifs.

______________________________

"Hello?" Lily called out as she trudged up the driveway, the keys to her mom's car jingling in one hand, a plastic-wrapped tray of various cookies held in the other. One upside to being muggleborn was definitely the additional travel options, Lily thought to herself. "James, open the door! My hands are full!"

"Hey there!" James' voice rang out from the left side of the house, appearing just a second after she registered where he was. "Sorry, I was doing some work clearing out the weeds in the garden. Hard to do with layers of snow covering the area, but luckily for me, my parents got this place knowing it was set away from the muggles so I can still use my wand." James wiped his hands off on his dark jeans before gesturing for her to follow him inside.

Lily was having trouble wrapping her mind around this grown up version of James. He came across as so responsible and mature, though what else should she have expected? She scolded herself for expecting that he would still be that same eighteen year old she had started to envision a life with.

"These look incredible," James complimented as he gently slid the tray out of her hand and carried it into the kitchen.

"James, it smells incredible in here," she breathed out as the scents of various spices filled her nose. She could see the small pot on the stovetop and the oven light was on, indicating that there was a dish being kept warm inside.

"I just made us a spiced carrot and lentil soup, and a small roast chicken and vegetables. You brought the real goods though," James informed her, a wide grin on his face as he silently waved his wand, conjuring two table settings, the bottle of wine already uncorked that poured itself two healthy glasses of wine. "I'm sorry, I assumed you'd join me for dinner. I hope that's alright."

"It's perfect. It really does smell good. I'm sure it tastes great too," Lily reassured him as she slid her coat off, peeking around before hanging it on a small coat hook by the side door. "It's so cozy in here, not what I would have expected from a Potter family vacation home."

James laughed softly at the joke, offering her the glass of wine before shrugging. "It's not big at all. That's probably why we didn't come here often. Mum loved the extravagance of the larger homes and resorts. Dad was the one who liked the quiet bliss that the coast offered. I think this was one of his ideas. I didn't get it when I was little… but I do now."

Lily let the words settle in, taking a small sip of the wine.

"I was bored the few times we came here as a child. I had so much energy, y'know? I needed a friend to play with and something to keep me entertained at all times. Now that I'm older I crave the quiet sometimes. Everything gets to just be so loud and I can manage but I just need a few minutes to catch my breath sometimes."

James' words kept Lily quiet, letting the thoughts flicker through her mind as she imagined this new James and tried to merge it with the James she knew. "Yeah, I get that," she finally said.

He set about serving the soup and then carving the chicken and plating some of that as well. She watched in fascination as he did things the muggle way, a small smile on her face as he flitted around the kitchen expertly.

"I lost my wand at Sirius' for a week about six years ago. It was a nightmare," he explained as if answering a question she didn't ask. "I couldn't conjure anything, couldn't just make food in an instant, but I think I learned how nice it can be to get your hands dirty and make something on your own. I still use magic to help me out now, though."

Lily laughed at her cheeky grin and assisted him with refilling their glasses just before settling into the seat he pointed to. Settled across from him at the table, Lily had a brief flash of what life could have been.

The two passed through their meal, casually chatting and checking in with their current status. James was between "experiences," trying to find the right next move in the wizarding world that would fulfill his desires to do something good. Lily was working with some of London's most skilled healers, researching a new potion that would cure effects of dark magic that had never been explored before.

"See, that is something I've always loved about you, Evans! You could do anything you want in this world, make enormous amounts of money doing private materialistic work, and instead you want to make a true difference. Just brilliant!" James complimented before shoveling in a mouthful of chicken, finishing off his meal.

Lily's cheeks flushed, choosing to ignore the first part of his compliment. "Well, thank you. I think I'm a little selfish though. The notoriety if we can pull it off means I'll be guaranteed a job anywhere I want in the future. But thank you."

James boldly reached across the small table and took her hand into his, giving it a gentle squeeze. He didn't drop it after squeezing, instead just holding it across the table. "You can stay, can't you? For a bit longer?"

Lily nodded quickly, not wanting this night to end. She wasn't entirely sure what they were going to do, but just being in James' presence was a warm balm on her soul. Being around her family could be draining, especially her sister and her sister's husband, and their preteen son. Ever since their father had passed, Lily's mom worked overtime at the holidays to smooth things over between her girls, trying to keep her family together.

James was offering Lily an escape from the constant stress and darkness she felt visiting her childhood home. It was the reprieve she didn't even know she wanted until it had been offered.

"I have nowhere else to be," she explained before realizing how cold that sounded. "Nowhere else I'd rather be."

James grinned at this, using his free hand to wave his wand and clear the dishes from in front of them, the tray of cookies suddenly appearing unwrapped on the small table. She grinned up at him before reaching for a peanut butter ball, his own settling on a gingerbread man.

He used his grip on her hand to ease her out of her seat, guiding her towards the little sitting area that he had near the back of the house. It was a small room, two bookcases settled on either side of the large window that framed the lake. There was a small couch and coffee table, a rug underneath that made the room feel warmer somehow. The fireplace sat on the left of the couch, a small blaze already going, built up by a flick of James' wand to warm the room just a bit more.

Lily was unsure what to do with herself before deciding that she wanted to just enjoy this space with James for a short while, so she let her feet carry her to the couch, curling them beneath her as she sat. Her body was aimed towards the empty space beside her, waiting patiently for James to take the hint and fill the seat. When he did so, her grin grew that much brighter.

"If you had asked me earlier what my plans were for tonight, this is the last thing I would have expected," he admitted, his cheeks tinged pink, though she blamed that warmth on the fire. His eyes met hers and she felt her own cheeks flush, though that warmth could be blamed solely on James' burning gaze.

"Me either," she told him softly, a shaky hand bringing the wine glass to her lips. "But I'm glad that we're both here."

Lily licked her lips and she watched as James' eyes dropped to her mouth as her tongue poked out just slightly. She heard the hitch in his breath and felt a slow burning in the pit of her stomach mixed with anxiety, wondering if this was going to end up being a mistake.

"I... '' Lily stopped herself with a shake of her head, glancing up at James nervously. His hand reached up to push back a lock of hair that had fallen out of her long braid, letting his fingers tentatively trail down her cheek, thumb tracing along her jaw. Her breath was caught in her throat and for a split second she wasn't sure if she would ever breathe again. "I'm leaving on Tuesday. I have to leave immediately after the holiday to return to work. I… I can't stay."

"I know," he breathed out, face inching closer to hers. "I know you have to be back, but we could… this could be just a thing we do. Right?"

The husky tone of his voice was driving Lily mad. She wanted to lean forward and accept whatever was about to happen, but she stopped herself and tried to let rational thoughts process in her mind. She knew the hurt she had felt last time they parted, but she hadn't been prepared for that rejection. This time she could protect herself, and her heart. Lily would know exactly what was happening this time and could stop herself from getting in too deep.

Yes, it would be just fine this time. They both knew this was just for the weekend. Something to get them through the holidays until they returned to their individual lives.

Lily leaned forward the rest of the way, feeling the way that James' fingers clenched against her jaw in response to her lips meeting his. They hadn't kissed in almost ten years and yet it was like riding a bicycle with how easily she fell back into a rhythm. Her head tilted just slightly to avoid nudging his glasses, her mouth opening beneath his for only a second before James pulled away.

She felt her mouth forming a slight pout, but James just smirked as he took the wine glasses and set them onto the coffee table before letting his hands slip down her waist until he was gripping her hips tightly.

"Only for the weekend," Lily spoke firmly, her fingers itching to touch him again. She had memorized his body at eighteen, let it be a memory of hers that lingered in the back of her mind for those nights when she felt so lonely and wanted to conjure up a dream that would keep her warm at night, hand shoved into her pants as she frantically tried to remember what it had felt like to be so cherished.

Over the years, the memory of him had faded and felt icky to use as she grew older. Lily had always tried to imagine what he would look like now, but as her hands slid beneath his shirt, nothing had prepared her for this adult James.

His own hands slid beneath her shirt, his thumbs stroking at the ridges along her spine. "You're too skinny, I'm afraid you'll shatter in my arms."

Lily pulled away to laugh at his comment, her face lighting up as the tension between them broke. There was something about James that made her feel at ease, even when he was being serious.

"I'm not that fragile. You can be rough with me," her voice was breathy as she leaned in once more, a groan falling from James' lips as she spoke.

"You can't say shit like that to me, Evans," James muttered darkly, his fingers pressing roughly against her spine to bring her closer. Lily took it a step further, climbing into his lap so that her thighs were framing his own. Their bodies aligned tightly together, faces only inches apart.

"And why not?" she whispered, lightly kissing his lower lip, allowing a faint smile to spread across her mouth. A sound that Lily could only describe as a growl came from him as he fervently kissed her, hands now sliding down to grip her arse. This was the answer to her question. A passionate, anxious, feverish kiss.

Her own hands slid from his biceps to his shoulder to his hair, gripping it tightly as if it were an anchor, not allowing him to move away. Though, it didn't seem that he had any intention to.

Lily felt like her body was on fire everywhere his hands touched. They were roaming over her frantically, like he was afraid that she would slip away at any given moment. They finally settled back on her bottom, giving it a firm squeeze before guiding her hips to slant over his just so. She could feel the hard press of him against her core, feel the way that her body ached in reaction to that gentle cant of his hips, lifting slightly to meet her own subtle thrusts.

"Lily, please," he begged, letting a hand slip to the hem of her thick sweater, tugging at it gently until she nodded, allowing her arms to lift up so he could tug it over her head. A few wisps of hair fell from her braid at the sudden friction of material, though her body felt cooled off by the slight chill in the air. Lily peeked over and realized the fire had died down again, though she was distracted once more as James' fingers unclasped her bra from behind and the straps slid down her arms with his guidance. His hands quickly replaced the cups, her nipples hardening beneath the rough texture of his palms.

A soft moan slipped from her lips as his fingers began to stroke in even circles, slowly tightening until they were tugging at her nipples in that way she liked.

"James," her voice was a harsh croak as she leaned forward, capturing his mouth in another kiss, letting her hands slip beneath his own shirt. She pulled it up, separating from his mouth only to pull it off. Her tongue probed at his mouth, wanting to taste every inch of him. If he was desperate to feel, she was desperate to taste.

James hands' never stopped their assault on her breasts, palming and tugging at her nipples until she was squeezing her thighs together, only his own were getting in the way. Instead, she began to slowly press herself down against his length, needing to feel something more than what he was doing. One of his hands moved from her breast up to cup the back of her head, his fingers probably messing up her braid, but she didn't quite mind.

Lily felt the groan that he let out, not just against her mouth, but beneath her hands that were pressed to his own chest. That firm chest that had only strengthened over time. A shiver ran down Lily's spine as his mouth pulled back from hers with a tug to her bottom lip using his teeth. Those teeth that scraped down her neck, sucking gently and peppering kisses until he reached her chest. His tongue poked out and circled once, twice, around the flesh until he sucked at her nipple. She gasped, both hands gripping the back of his head, keeping him pressed there as she arched up towards his mouth.

"James, please," she whimpered, her voice hoarse as she straddled one of his thighs, trying to press herself against it through her thin leggings. She knew that she was soaked through, desperate for his touch.

"What do you need?" he asked after pulling away from her chest, letting the hand that had been in her hair travel down her back and around then around to her stomach until it reached the waistband of her leggings. His fingers moved just beneath it, slowly inching towards the one place that was taking up all of her focus.

"Please," Lily breathed out, lifting her hips up to try to make room for his fingers, but he insisted on teasing her, letting them just stroke against the front of her pelvis, not even sliding beneath the thin silk of her underwear. "James, please. I need to feel you inside me."

James choked on a moan, bringing a smile to Lily's lips that quickly turned into a soft "oh" as his fingers slid lower and pressed against her through the fabric, index and middle finger rubbing in small circles. It wasn't enough, but it was more than she had a minute ago and that was progress.

"Oh," she breathed out again, clutching the back of his head once more as she tried to move her hips, though he steadied her with his free hand, keeping her in place. Lily hated how needy she felt, how much her body craved the feeling of his own.

James pulled his hand out suddenly, her face falling once more at the loss of contact. He only kissed her, distracting her long enough until he was suddenly standing, hands holding onto her arse for support as he began to carry her towards his bedroom. Lily began to pepper kisses along his jaw and neck, too distracted to notice which way he was walking them.

She squealed in delight as he tossed her down onto the bed, his own laugh bouncing off of the walls before he grew serious once more, climbing over her on the bed. His body encased hers, providing a shelter from the cold as he let one hand slide down to her hip, pushing her pants lower until she took the hint and assisted him in getting them off. Her own hands then went to the button on his jeans, pulling it open so that she could push the material down his legs, letting her feet finish the job until they were on the floor somewhere by the side of the bed.

Their breaths were heavy as he leaned down and kissed her once more, left hand sliding beneath her panties once more until a single finger was pressing inside of her.

"Fuck, Lily. You're so wet." He sounded incredulous as he began to slowly curl that finger and then pull it out before pushing it back in. His finger moved in slow strokes as she began to pant, lifting her hips in time with the pushing, lowering them with the pulling.

"It's for you," Lily whimpered, clutching onto his shoulders as she tried to get him to give her more. She just needed more of him. "James, please. Stop teasing me!"

"Anything for you, Evans," his cheeky grin made her giggle as he slid his briefs down his body, kicking them off somewhere before kneeling before her, spreading her legs with both of his hands. "Fuck, you're the most beautiful thing I've ever seen."

Lily keened at the compliment, her lips already flushed from activity, though she was sure they'd be red at his words.

"I'm - I take a contraceptive. You don't need to… We're covered," she finally admitted, tugging him back down by wrapping her spread legs around his waist so that their bodies were aligned once more. Lily let her hips lift until the tip of his cock was gently pressing inside of her, slipping out as she lowers her hips again. James seems frozen for a moment and this scares her, but he must see the look on her face because he lowers his mouth to hers and just kisses her until that anxiety is quelled.

When it's obvious that she's putty in his hands once again, nerves calmed down by the soothing action of his lips and tongue, his hips press forward until he's filling her. It's agonizingly slow until their hips are tight together and he breaks their kiss to let out a loud groan against her mouth.

"You're… Fuck, I… You…" James is speechless and this makes Lily giggle fiercely until he's pulling out halfway and then pressing back in, as if he can't bear to even be separated from her for that much. "I've never wanted anyone the way I want you, Evans."

"Oh, gods, James," Lily moans as she pressed her hands into his shoulder blades, wanting his body to press into hers completely. She wants to feel every inch of him against her, wants to memorize the way he feels as he's inside her fully. This ache that she's had since seeing him again feels like it's starting to be sated.

As if something has broken inside his body, James begins to thrust in and out, his hips moving at their own pace. Lily feels like her body is connected to his by a string, because everytime he goes to move, her hips are there to meet his at each thrust.

"Nobody but you, Evans. Nobody has ever felt this good. Fuck, nobody. Fuck," James rambled, each thrust feeling like it's not enough and too much all at once for her. Lily wants to come, wants to feel her world fall apart, so she slips a hand between their bodies and reaches down to where their hips meet. Before she can accomplish this, his hand is there, pushing hers away.

"No, this is mine to give," he whispered, nipping at her earlobe with his teeth as he let his fingers find where they met, rubbing small circles against her clit as she felt a tidal wave of pleasure wash over her body in waves, that pit in her stomach tightening as she tried to just reach that point of pleasure.

James seemed to understand what her body needed because he continued to thrust in a way that was getting her to that point until her toes curled and her heels were digging into his hips harshly.

"James, oh, oh," her voice was like a siren's call because within an instant he was meeting her in a wave of pleasure, his back arched as he groaned and spilled inside of her.

"Lily," was the only thing he whispered before giving her another kiss, pulling out of her body in one smooth motion, using wandless magic to summon a warm towel and a wet washcloth. Just as he took care of her during the act, James made sure to take gentle care of her in the clean up, just enough, before allowing her to use the bathroom to finish up.

Lily took one look in the mirror, her braid now half pulled out of its form and eyeliner smudged beneath her lids. She giggled to herself as she used the toilet and then wet another washcloth to wipe under her eyes. Lily dug around until she found a comb and was able to brush out her hair into soft waves, letting them fall down her back.

She felt self conscious reentering the room, though the wide grin on James' face as he gestured for her to join him in the bed washed that feeling away, replacing it with a warmth that his grin always seemed to bring.

"That sure was something, Evans," James teased, leaning over once she had joined him again to press a soft kiss to her mouth. "You sure are something."

Lily could only let out a breathy giggle as she laid on her back for a moment, trying to wrap her mind around what the fuck had just happened. Sure, she knew what was going to happen, but somehow they had ended up naked and in bed together much faster than she realized. There hadn't been any time for thinking, and that was honestly the best feeling.

"Hey, you okay?" James' voice broke through her ocean of thoughts. She felt the corners of her mouth tilt up and she nodded quickly, a glow overtaking her as his hands slid down to her hips, bringing her closer to his body until she could tuck her face into the crook of his neck. Lily cocooned herself into his body, letting him lift a sheet over her.

"I'm okay," she finally responded, the index finger on her left hand circling around his nipple, though she wasn't fully paying attention to her actions. "I'm good."

"You looked like you regretted it, for a minute there," James sounded nervous as he admitted to this and she peeked up at him from her hiding spot, watching the nerves in his eyes disappear as she offered up a genuine smile, letting her mouth press gently to his jaw.

"No regrets, it was good. You were good." Lily's voice sounded assured and it was a surprise to her how comfortable she felt laying here with James.

"Not even one?"

"Nope, not a single one. It was good, James."

James seemed content at that, the hum he released vibrating against her cheek which had returned to his solid chest. The pair laid contentedly for some time before James broke them out of their reverie. His hands had been sliding up and down her back, fingers tracing along the ridges of her spine until she was almost ready to fall asleep.

"I regret that we never made it work. That we didn't try harder. I should've tried harder for you," James told Lily, letting his hands continue in their soothing patterns on her skin. His voice sounded pained and Lily wasn't too sure how she wanted to answer.

I wish the same? It's fine, don't worry about it? I should've tried harder but my crippling anxiety and insecurities got the best of me until I gave up on the idea of us?

No - definitely not that last one.

Instead, Lily settled for an uncommitted hum instead, just letting him interpret what he wanted from that.

"I'm serious, Lily. You're the one person I've never been able to get past. Everyone dims compared to you. I meant what I said back in those days, and I should've tried harder to show you that."

As if dipping her head into a pensieve, Lily was taken back to the last time they had been curled up in bed like this:

"You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen in my life, Lily." James' words captured her heart as he slid his fingers down her body, tracing the curves of her thighs before pulling them around his waist so he could have her body wrapped around his own.

"Stop it," Lily admonished, cheeks burning from the compliment.

"I mean it. I've loved you for years, probably since the day I met you. Maybe even before we met. I was made to love you. I can't imagine a world without you in it. I can't imagine my life without you in it, Lily Evans."

"James, you're just saying that because I let you have sex with me."

"No, that's not true! I mean it," James pouted as he spoke, only smiling once Lily kissed the pout away. "When we leave here, wherever we go, I want to make this work. I want to marry you one day, have you take my last name, become a family. I want to be a dad and have kids with you. I want a life with you, Lily Evans. You're it for me."

Despite his words, James had never sought her out after that final encounter. They had never even spoken after that day, separated by time and space and people who wanted to keep them apart. An impending war, one that was completed just a month after graduation. One that James had been ready to throw himself into, and one Lily had been scared to join but knew it was the only way to move forward.

The day she had met with Dumbledore and he told her that the fight was over, that they had won, he provided her with a top notch recommendation to one of the world's most well-renowned potioneers. That month had been a rush of emotions as she prepared to battle (and lose her life) only to come to terms with the fact that she no longer needed to. She had an entire future ahead of her and yet there she was, trying to figure out how she was supposed to spend a life she never thought she'd be entitled to have.

"Where'd you go just now?" James asked, stroking through her hair until he let his hands fall down to her lower back, slowly inching until he was gripping her bottom, pulling her tightly to him.

"I was just thinking about how long it's been since we last saw each other. How much you've changed." Lily's words were a lie and for a minute she thought he'd call her out on it, but he chose not to, instead letting his mouth move down to her neck, sucking on the sensitive skin there.

"What are you doing?" she asked quietly, fingers combing through his hair.

"Pulling you out of your own thoughts until you can think of nothing but me and you. Here. In this bed." James sounded firm as his mouth slowly kissed down to her chest. She moaned softly as he nipped the soft flesh on her breast before lapping at the mark, as if he was going to heal the pain she felt. His lips wrapped around her nipple, but Lily was still trying to get herself to think straight.

"I can hear your brain starting to smoke," James whispered before blowing over her breast, the peak hardening under his cool breath.

"Shut up," Lily muttered uselessly, having no brain power to think of something more insulting.

James just grinned and continued his assault on her body, moving lower and lower until her fingers were tangled in his hair and his mouth was working wonders.

Later, his cheek was pressed to her stomach, hand pressed to her hip so that she wouldn't go anywhere. Her fingers combed through James' hair slowly, trying to muster up the strength to ask him to move so she can get dressed and go home.

"Stay for the night," he whispered, as if reading her mind. "I miss holding you. Even if it's only for the weekend."

"Okay," the word was out of her mouth before she even realized that she wanted to agree. Lily knew that she was just complicating things, but the thought of leaving this warm bed and, more importantly, leaving James just hurt to think of. It was a problem that future Lily could deal with. This Lily wanted to bask in the afterglow of climaxes and cuddling with this James.

Somehow through the night, James and Lily shifted until their legs tangled together and he was spooning her against his chest. She woke up to the light shining through the windows, unclear of what time it was. Lily thought back to last night, the amount of kissing and touching that they had done. The thought made Lily's toes curl and she pulled his arms tighter around her body as she nuzzled into the pillow.

Her movements must have woken James because she felt chapped lips pressing little sucking kisses to the back of her neck and shoulder, fingers slowly gliding down her body until James was gripping onto her hips, pulling her back so that their bodies stayed connected where it counted. Lily let out a breathy sigh as he slipped his other hand in between her thighs, stroking at a lazy pace as he woke them both up. They stayed in that sleepy state, hips undulating against one another, fingers stroking inside of her until she had soaked his hand thoroughly.

James finally rolled Lily onto her back, climbing over her with a satisfied smile on his face despite the fact that nothing had truly happened yet this morning.

"Hi," he whispered, lips hovering just above hers.

"Hi," she murmured back, a small smile turning up the corners of her mouth.

"I missed this," he admitted as he pressed the tip of his cock against her, slightly thrusting his hips as he teased her, letting the tension build. "I missed you."

"You missed the sex, you mean," Lily teased, fingers slowly climbing up his body as she spread her legs just that fraction of an inch, indicating she wanted him to move things along. He did as she silently requested, sliding inside of her at an agonizingly slow pace, wanting her to feel him as they connected.

"Well, duh, but I missed this. I missed waking up to you and spending time in this half dozed state where I can just appreciate you and it's just us two in the world." James' voice held a tone of sincerity that caused a chill to run up Lily's spine, her fingernails digging into his shoulder blades as she tried not to let the emotion completely take over.

"I-" she broke off, just pressing her lips quickly to his.

"I want a do-over. I want to do this with you every morning. There's nobody else for me, Lily," he breathed against her mouth, picking up his pace just a bit as he moved his mouth to her ear. His hips continued to move slowly in and out of her at a stuttering pace as James whispered all of his filthy thoughts into her ear:

"You're so beautiful like this."

"I love the noise you make when I push inside of you just here.. Yes, that's it."

"Fuck, moan my name. That's my girl."

"I want you to feel me. I want you to know it's only me who can make you feel like this."

"I want to love you like this forever, Lily."

Despite James' chattiness, Lily can do nothing more than make keening noises for him. She is a mess of whimpers and purrs, moans and soft cries. James has whittled her down to this voiceless void, craving only the pleasure that he can bring her.

Finally, a single cry please comes from her lips and he is right there with her, sliding a hand down between them to rub her clit in small, erratic circles until she is riding the wave of her climax, mouthing at his neck as she holds back until she feels that he is also coming, and his name falls from her mouth in a helpless cry, one of her hands tangling up in his hair as she feels tears fill her eyes.

The thought of never getting this again just may be what breaks her.

______________________________

It's only later that evening when they're curled up on the loveseat together, despite the large couch settled just to their right with almost double the space, that Lily realizes how late it's getting. He had plied her full of food and distracted her with a leisurely walk around the lakeside, before Lily was fully able to recognize just how late it had gotten.

The clock has just chimed out eight little bells, and Lily wonders how much longer she should stay.

"Stay with me for the night. There's no need for you to rush out of here," James told her, his fingers stroking down along her spine. Despite the years that separated them, he still seemed to have the ability to read her thoughts when it counted, when she wasn't consciously trying to hide them.

"I really should be going home soon," she responded, sitting up so that she could actually look into his eyes, trying to figure out how she was going to pull herself away from his embrace. James had his calves hooked around hers, and his arms were wrapped around her lower back so that she was able to lay against him almost entirely.

"Why?"

The question surprised Lily more than she anticipated, mostly because she had expected an argument in response from him. She hadn't expected to have to rationalize her own thoughts, mostly because she didn't agree with what she was saying out loud.

"I have things to get done before my parent's Christmas dinner party. I know it's not until Tuesday but I have some work I planned to attend to even though I'm supposed to be enjoying the holiday. Up until now there wasn't much about it that was enjoyable, so I figured I'd at least be productive. And this is anything but productive."

"Those all sound like things that can wait. You just said it yourself, you don't have to do it but it was something to do. Just stay here. Relax. Enjoy your holiday." With each sentence, James placed a kiss along her neck, moving lower until he was at the juncture where her neck became her shoulder. "I want another night with you. I want you in my bed, with me."

"James…" Lily breathed out, though her hands were steadily climbing until they were settled into his hair.

"I don't want to wake up alone on Christmas Eve. Stay with me for one more night, Lily." The pleading tone to his voice would have been what did her in, had she not already been trying to convince herself to stay minutes ago. Between her own convincing, and his begging, she knew that she was giving in to his request.

"I don't want to wake up alone, either." Lily admitted, not specifying that it was more than just Christmas Eve that felt lonely to her. Lily was tired of feeling alone, and if James was offering a brief respite from that feeling, who was she to deny that?

______________________________

If Lily had to put a word to her concerns, she would use the word doubt. There was so much doubt running through her head. At every little touch James left as they ate dinner or nibbled on cookies or sipped at coca. At every compliment he threw her way while they walked around the lake shore or cooked dinner or laid in bed.

The only time she felt confident in what he said was when he was buried deep inside of her in the middle of the night, the stars twinkling in the night sky as they erased the outside world and focused on one another. This was the only time he mentioned a future with her, wanting to spend a life together. She wished he had the courage to mention these things in the light of day, when their bodies weren't pressed together beneath covers and hands desperate to feel soft skin beneath their touch.

They stayed up late into the night, relearning each others' bodies. Lily was committing James' new body to memory, her hands hungry for more of him. She wanted to remember every freckle and mole, every curve and sharp plane. These memories would need to get her through the next decade.

______________________________

Late the next morning, they both awoke slowly and lazily, their bodies still curled together from the heat of the previous night. Lily had woken just moments before James and took the time to appreciate his sleepy state before his eyes blinked open and a smile formed on his face when he registered what she was doing.

"G'morning," he whispered softly, pressing his thumb to her cheek and stroking it gently until it was tracing her full lower lip.

Lily pressed a kiss to the pad of his thumb before sucking it into her mouth, swirling her tongue around it gently. That teasing effort brought a groan to his lips before he was pulling it back, pressing a heated kiss to her mouth.

"You little minx," he growled, tickling her sides playfully.

How could he be so pleasant when she was leaving in just a short time?

"James," she whispered, and the tone of her voice had his body going numb, freezing up above her as his smile fell and she watched him shake his head.

"No," he replied, pressing his hips against hers, as if trying to remind her of what she could have if she agreed to stay.

"I have to go."

"Please," James pleaded, but she knew by the look on his face that he understood her mind was made up. This was a last ditch attempt at changing her mind. At trying to change the course of their separate lives.

"I have to."

The two of them stared at one another, noses brushing as their breaths mingled together in the morning sun pouring in through the window.

"I know," James finally admitted, letting his lips just barely brush over hers before standing up and helping her out of the fortress they had built with his blankets.

The two dressed silently, searching for garments and items that had been haphazardly tossed about over the weekend. Lily only smiled once when she found her underwear tucked beneath a pillow on the couch, shoved there by James at one point when he was trying to convince her to join him in the shower.

______________________________

Soon enough, her items were packed into her purse and there was no more delaying the inevitable.

They stared at one another from across the room, taking slow steps towards each other until they were both just by his front door, standing an awkward length apart. All weekend their bodies had been desperate to connect, and now it was as if they were two sides of the same battery, repelled by a single touch.

"So…" Lily finally let out, looking past James to the lakeside cabin that had been her saving grace for this solitary weekend.

James said nothing in response, just studying her face. Her eyes darted down to her feet, trying to figure out what else she could say. How could they change this?

She looked up again, hoping to see a hint of warmth in his gaze, but all she could see was a steely gaze that looked back at her. She saw no hint of the James that she had just spent an entire weekend with. Once more, her heart was cracking as she saw this potential future she had dreamed of falling to pieces right in front of her eyes.

It had been real enough just to get her through.

Lily was internally begging for James to take her hand. Squeeze it tight once more. Just once. Let her know that this wasn't just a one-sided thing. He felt it too, he had to feel it too. If he just reached out and grabbed her hand, she'd cancel her plans. She'd stay. She'd claim him as hers.

But he didn't. His hands stayed shoved into his pockets, the same as that first time she saw him again, walking in the same direction towards the market.

Had she fooled herself once again? Thinking that it was something more than it was. Lily pleaded with herself to just make the leap, damn the insecurities, take his hand and jump over the ledge. All she had to do was cross that line. Instead, her own hands hung loosely in front of her, fingers idly tangled together with her purse hanging at her hip.

She could almost envision it, the creaking of the cabin floor as she stepped forward and begged him to come with her, to join her in London where they could create this world together that had the both of them in it. The way his arms would slowly wrap around her waist and keep her pressed against him while they whispered about how stupid they had almost been to let each other go for a second time.

She could almost see it.

"I guess… I guess I should go. I have that dinner party at my parents' tomorrow and I promised to help mom prepare for guests."

"Oh, yeah, that makes sense." James whispered, looking like he was conflicted for a moment before he leaned forward and pressed a gentle kiss to her cheek. Despite the warmth of his lips, her body ran cold as it was the only place their bodies met. His hands, usually desperate to touch her, stayed tucked deep into his pockets.

Lily was frozen in place for a second before realizing she would have to be the one to leave. Once again, Lily mustered up every ounce of strength she had and walked through his door, away from James and his warm bed, the cocoon they had built together that felt like a safe haven. She wiped her tears away slowly, only once that heavy door had closed behind her.

Maybe one day they'd find a way to get the timing right.

Maybe one day she'd find that Gryffindor courage she was supposedly blessed with.

Not today.

[grigori77]

Summer 2021′s Movies - My Top Ten Favourite Films (Part 2)

The Top Ten:

10.  WEREWOLVES WITHIN – definitely one of the year’s biggest cinematic surprises so far, this darkly comic supernatural murder mystery from indie horror director Josh Ruben (Scare Me) is based on a video game, but you’d never know it – this bears so little resemblance to the original Ubisoft title that it’s a wonder anyone even bothered to make the connection, but even so, this is now notable for officially being the highest rated video game adaptation in Rotten Tomatoes history, with a Certified Fresh rating of 86%. Certainly it deserves that distinction, but there’s so much more to the film – this is an absolute blood-splattered joy, the title telling you everything you need to know about the story but belying the film’s pure, quirky genius.  Veep’s Sam Richardson is forest ranger Finn Wheeler, a gentle and socially awkward soul who arrives at his new post in the remote small town of Beaverton to discover the few, uniformly weird residents are divided over the oil pipeline proposition of forceful and abrasive businessman Sam Parker (The Hunt’s Wayne Duvall).  As he tries to fit in and find his feet, investigating the disappearance of a local dog while bonding with local mail carrier Cecily Moore (Other Space and This Is Us’ Milana Vayntrub), the discovery of a horribly mutilated human body leads to a standoff between the townsfolk and an enforced lockdown in the town’s ramshackle hotel as they try to work out who amongst them is the “werewolf” they suspect is responsible.  This is frequently hilarious, the offbeat script from appropriately named Mishna Wolff (I’m Down) dropping some absolutely zingers and crafting some enjoyably weird encounters and unexpected twists, while the uniformly excellent cast do much of the heavy-lifting to bring their rich, thoroughly oddball characters to vivid life – Richardson is thoroughly cuddly throughout, while Duvall is pleasingly loathsome, Casual’s Michaela Watkins is pleasingly grating as Trisha, flaky housewife to unrepentant local horn-dog Pete Anderton (Orange is the New Black’s Michael Chernus), and Cheyenne Jackson (American Horror Story) and Harry Guillen (best known, OF COURSE, as Guillermo in the TV version of What We Do In the Shadows) make an enjoyably spiky double-act as liberal gay couple Devon and Joaquim Wolfson; in the end, though, the film is roundly stolen by Vayntrub, who invests Cecily with a bubbly sweetness and snarky sass that makes it absolutely impossible to not fall completely in love with her (gods know I did).  This is a deeply funny film, packed with proper belly-laughs from start to finish, but like all the best horror comedies it takes its horror elements seriously, delivering some enjoyably effective scares and juicy gore, while the werewolf itself, when finally revealed, is realised through some top-notch prosthetics.  Altogether this was a most welcome under-the-radar surprise for the summer, and SO MUCH MORE than just an unusually great video game adaptation …

9.  THE TOMORROW WAR – although cinemas finally reopened in the UK in early summer, the bite of the COVID lockdown backlog was still very much in effect this blockbuster season, with several studios preferring to hedge their bets and wait for later release dates. Others turned to streaming services, including Paramount, who happily lined up a few heavyweight titles to open on major platforms in lieu of the big screen.  One of the biggest was this intended sci-fi action horror tentpole, meant to give Chris Pratt another potential franchise on top of Guardians of the Galaxy and Jurassic World, which instead dropped in early July on Amazon Prime.  So, was it worth staying in on a Saturday night instead of heading out for something on the BIG screen?  Mostly yes, although it’s mainly a trashy, guilty pleasure big budget B-picture charm that makes this such a worthwhile experience – the film’s biggest influences are clearly Independence Day and Starship Troopers, two admirably clunky blockbusters that DEFINED prioritising big spectacle and overblown theatrics over intelligent writing and realistic storytelling.  It doesn’t help that the premise is pure bunk – in 2022, a wormhole opens from thirty years in the future, and a plea for help is sent back with a bunch of very young future soldiers.  Seems Earth will become overrun by an unstoppable swarm of nasty alien critters called Whitespikes in 25 years, and the desperate human counteroffensive have no choice but to bring soldiers from our present into the future to help them fight back and save the humanity from imminent extinction.  Less than a year later, the world’s standing armies have been decimated and a worldwide draft has been implemented, with normal everyday adults being sent through for a seven day tour from which very few return.  Pratt plays biology teacher and former Green Beret Dan Forrester, one of the latest batch of draftees to be sent into the future along with a selection of chefs, soccer moms and other average joes – his own training and experience serves him better than most when the shit hits the fan, but it soon becomes clear that he’s just as out of his depth as everyone else as the sheer enormity of the threat is revealed.  But when he becomes entangled with a desperate research outfit led by Muri (Chuck’s Yvonne Strahovski) who seem to be on the verge of a potential world-changing scientific breakthrough, Dan realises there just might be a slender hope for humanity after all … this is every bit as over-the-top gung-ho bonkers as it sounds, and just as much fun.  Director Chris McKay may still be pretty fresh (with only The Lego Batman Movie under his belt to date), but he shows a lot of talent and potential for big budget blockbuster filmmaking here, delivering with guts and bravado on some major action sequences (a fraught ticking-clock SAR operation through a war-torn Miami is the film’s undeniable highlight, but a desperate battle to escape a blazing oil rig also really impresses), as well as handling some impressively complex visual effects work and wrangling some quality performances from his cast (altogether it bodes well for his future, which includes Nightwing and Johnny Quest as future projects).  Chris Pratt can do this kind of stuff in his sleep – Dan is his classic fallible and self-deprecating but ultimately solid and kind-hearted action hero fare, effortlessly likeable and easy to root for – and his supporting cast are equally solid, Strahovsky going toe-to-toe with him in the action sequences while also creating a rewardingly complex smart-woman/badass combo in Muri, while the other real standouts include Sam Richardson (Veep, Werewolves Within) and Edwin Hodge (The Purge movies) as fellow draftees Charlie and Dorian, the former a scared-out-of-his-mind tech geek while the latter is a seriously hardcore veteran serving his THIRD TOUR, and the ever brilliant J.K. Simmonds as Dan’s emotionally scarred estranged Vietnam-vet father, Jim.  Sure, it’s derivative as hell and thoroughly predictable (with more than one big twist you can see coming a mile away), but the pace is brisk, the atmosphere pregnant with a palpable doomed urgency, and the creatures themselves are a genuinely convincing world-ending threat, the design team and visual effects wizards creating genuine nightmare fuel in the feral and unrelenting Whitespikes.  Altogether this WAS an ideal way to spend a comfy Saturday night in, but I think it could have been JUST AS GOOD for a Saturday night OUT at the Pictures …

8.  ARMY OF THE DEAD – another high profile release that went straight to streaming was this genuine monster hit for Netflix from one of this century’s undeniable heavyweight action cinema masters, the indomitable Zack Snyder, who kicked off his career with an audience-dividing (but, as far as I’m concerned, ultimately MASSIVELY successful) remake of George Romero’s immortal Dawn of the Dead, and has finally returned to zombie horror after close to two decades away.  The end result is, undeniably, the biggest cinematic guilty pleasure of the entire summer, a bona fide outbreak horror EPIC in spite of its tightly focused story – Dave Bautista plays mercenary Scott Ward, leader a badass squad of soldiers of fortune who were among the few to escape a deadly outbreak of a zombie virus in the city of Las Vegas, enlisted to break into the vault of one of the Strip’s casinos by owner Bly Tanaka (a fantastically game turn from Hiroyuki Sanada) and rescue $200 million still locked away inside.  So what’s the catch?  Vegas remains ground zero for the outbreak, walled off from the outside world but still heavily infested within, and in less than three days the US military intends to sterilise the site with a tactical nuke.  Simple premise, down and dirty, trashy flick, right?  Wrong – Snyder has never believed in doing things small, having brought us unapologetically BIG cinema with the likes of 300, Watchmen, Man of Steel and, most notably, his version of Justice League, so this is another MASSIVE undertaking, every scene shot for maximum thrills or emotional impact, each set-piece executed with his characteristic militaristic precision and explosive predilection (a harrowing fight for survival against a freshly-awakened zombie horde in tightly packed casino corridors is the film’s undeniable highlight), and the gauzy, dreamlike cinematography gives even simple scenes an intriguing and evocative edge that really does make you feel like you’re watching something BIG.  The characters all feel larger-than-life too – Bautista can seem somewhat cartoonish at times, and this role definitely plays that as a strength, making Scott a rock-hard alpha male in the classic Hollywood mould, but he’s such a great actor that of course he’s able to invest the character with real rewarding complexity beneath the surface; Ana de la Reguera (Eastbound & Down) and Nora Arnezeder (Zoo, Mozart in the Jungle), meanwhile, both bring a healthy dose of oestrogen-fuelled badassery to proceedings as, respectively, Scott’s regular second-in-command, Maria Cruz, and Lilly the Coyote, Power’s Omari Hardwick and Matthias Schweighofer (You Are Wanted) make for a fun odd-couple double act as circular-saw-wielding merc Vanderohe and Dieter, the nervous, nerdy German safecracker brought in to crack the vault, and Fear the Walking Dead’s Garrett Dillahunt channels spectacular scumbag energy as Tanaka’s sleazy former casino boss Martin, while latecomer Tig Notaro (Star Trek Discovery) effortlessly rises above her last-minute-casting controversy to deliver brilliantly as sassy and acerbic chopper pilot Peters.  I think it goes without saying that Snyder can do this in his sleep, but he definitely wasn’t napping here – he pulled out all the stops on this one, delivering a thrilling, darkly comic and endearingly CRACKERS zombie flick that not only compares favourably to his own Dawn but is, undeniably, his best film for AGES.  Netflix certainly seem to be pleased with the results – a spinoff prequel, Army of Thieves, starring Dieter in another heist thriller, is set to drop in October, with an animated series following in the Spring, and there’s already rumours of a sequel in development.  I’m certainly up for more …

7.  BLACK WIDOW – no major blockbuster property was hit harder by COVID than the MCU, which saw its ENTIRE SLATE for 2020 delayed for over a year in the face of Marvel Studios bowing to the inevitability of the Pandemic and unwilling to sacrifice those all-important box-office receipts by just sending their films straight to streaming.  The most frustrating part for hardcore fans of the series was the delay of a standalone film that was already criminally overdue – the solo headlining vehicle of founding Avenger and bona fide female superhero ICON Natasha Romanoff, aka the Black Widow.  Equally frustratingly, then, this film seems set to be overshadowed by real life controversy as star and producer Scarlett Johansson goes head-to-head with Disney in civil court over their breach-of-contract after they hedged their bets by releasing the film simultaneously in cinemas and on their own streaming platform, which has led to poor box office as many of the film’s potential audience chose to watch it at home instead of risk movie theatres with the virus still very much remaining a threat (and Disney have clearly reacted AGAIN, now backtracking on their release policy by instigating a new 45-day cinematic exclusivity window on all their big releases for the immediate future). But what of the film itself?  Well Black Widow is an interesting piece of work, director Cate Shortland (Berlin Syndrome) and screenwriter Eric Pearson (Thor: Ragnarok) delivering a decidedly stripped-back, lean and intellectual beast that bears greater resemblance to the more cerebral work of the Russo Brothers on their Captain America films than the more classically bombastic likes of Iron Man, Thor or the Avengers flicks, concentrating on story and characters over action and spectacle as we wind back the clock to before the events of Infinity War and Endgame, when Romanoff was on the run after Civil War, hunted by the government-appointed forces of US Secretary of State “Thunderbolt” Ross (William Hurt) after violating the Sokovia Accords.  Then a mysterious delivery throws her back into the fray as she finds herself targeted by a mysterious assassin, forcing her to team up with her estranged “sister” Yelena Belova (Midsommar’s Florence Pugh), another Black Widow who’s just gone rogue from the same Red Room Natasha escaped years ago, armed with a McGuffin capable of foiling a dastardly plot for world domination.  The reluctant duo need help in this endeavour though, enlisting the aid of their former “parents”, veteran Widow and scientist Melina Vostokoff (Rachel Weisz) and Alexie Shostakov (Stranger Things’ David Harbour), aka the Red Guardian, a Russian super-soldier intended to be their counterpart to Captain America, who’s been languishing in a Siberian gulag for the last twenty years. After the Earth-shaking, universe-changing events of recent MCU events, this film certainly feels like a much more self-contained, modest affair, playing for much smaller stakes, but that doesn’t mean it’s any less worthy of our attention – this is as precision-crafted as anything we’ve seen from Marvel so far, but it also feels like a refreshing change of pace after all those enormous cosmic shenanigans, while the script is as tight as a drum, propelling a taut, suspense-filled thriller that certainly doesn’t scrimp on the action front.  Sure, the set-pieces are very much in service of the story here, but they’re still the pre-requisite MCU rollercoaster rides, a selection of breathless chases and bone-crunching fights that really do play to the strengths of one of our favourite Avengers, but this is definitely one of those films where the real fireworks come when the film focuses on the characters – Johansson is so comfortable with her character she’s basically BECOME Natasha Romanoff, kickass and ruthless and complex and sassy and still just desperate for a family (though she hides it well throughout the film), while Weisz delivers one of her best performances in years as a peerless professional who keeps her emotions tightly reigned in but slowly comes to realise that she was never more happy than when she was pretending to be a simple mother, and Ray Winstone does a genuinely fantastic job of taking a character who could have been one of the MCU’s most disappointingly bland villains, General Dreykov, master of the Red Room, and investing him with enough oily charisma and intense presence to craft something truly memorable (frustratingly, the same cannot be said for the film’s supposed main physical threat, Taskmaster, who performs well in their frustratingly brief appearances but ultimately gets Darth Maul levels of short service).  The true scene-stealers in the film, however, are Alexie and Yelena – Harbour’s clearly having the time of his life hamming it up as a self-important, puffed-up peacock of a superhero who never got his shot and is clearly (rightly) decidedly bitter about it, preferring to relive the life he SHOULD have had instead of remembering the good in the one he got; Pugh, meanwhile, is THE BEST THING IN THE WHOLE MOVIE, easily matching Johanssen scene-for-scene in the action stakes but frequently out-performing her when it comes to acting, investing Yelena with a sweet naivety and innocence and a certain amount of quirky geekiness that makes for one of the year’s most endearing female protagonists (certainly one who, if the character goes the way I think she will, is thoroughly capable of carrying the torch for the foreseeable future).  In the end this is definitely one of the LEAST typical, by-the-numbers MCU films to date, and by delivering something a little different I think they’ve given us just the kind of leftfield swerve the series needs right now.  It’s certainly one of their most fascinating and rewarding films so far, and since it seems to be Johansson’s final tour of duty as the Black Widow, it’s also a most fitting farewell indeed.

6.  WRATH OF MAN – Guy Ritchie’s latest (regarded by many as a triumphant return to form, which I consider unfair since I don’t think he ever went away, especially after 2020’s spectacular The Gentlemen) is BY FAR his darkest film – let’s get this clear from the start.  Anyone who knows his work knows that Ritchie consistently maintains a near flawless balance and humour and seriousness in his films that gives them a welcome quirkiness that is one of his most distinctive trademarks, so for him to suddenly deliver a film which takes itself SO SERIOUSLY is one hell of a departure.  This is a film which almost REVELS in its darkness – Ritchie’s always loved bathing in man’s baser instincts, but Wrath of Man almost makes a kind of twisted VIRTUE out of wallowing in the genuine evils that men are capable of inflicting on each other.  The film certainly kicks off as it means to go on – In a tour-de-force single-shot opening, we watch a daring armoured car robbery on the streets of Los Angeles that goes horrifically wrong, an event which will have devastating consequences in the future.  Five months later, Fortico Security hires taciturn Brit Patrick Hill (Jason Statham) to work as a guard in one of their trucks, and on his first run he single-handedly foils another attempted robbery with genuinely uncanny combat skills. The company is thrilled, amazed by the sheer ability of their new hire, but Hill’s new colleagues are more concerned, wondering exactly what they’ve let themselves in for.  After a second foiled robbery, it becomes clear that Hill’s reputation has grown, but fellow guard Haiden (Holt McCallany), aka “Bullet”, begins to suspect there might be something darker going on … Ritchie is firing on all cylinders here, delivering a PERFECT slow-burn suspense thriller which plays its cards close to its chest and cranks up its piano wire tension with artful skill as it builds to a devastating, knuckle-whitening explosive heist that acts as a cathartic release for everything that’s built up over the past hour and a half.  In typical Ritchie style the narrative is non-linear, the story unfolding in four distinct parts told from clearly differentiated points of view, allowing the clues to be revealed at a trickle that effortlessly draws the viewer in as they fall deeper down the rabbit hole, leading to a harrowing but strangely poignant denouement which is perfectly in tune with everything that’s come before. It’s an immense pleasure finally getting to see Statham working with Ritchie again, and I don’t think he’s ever been better than he is here – he's always been a brilliantly understated actor, but there’s SO MUCH going on under Hill’s supposedly impenetrable calm that every little peek beneath the armour is a REVELATION; McCallany, meanwhile, has landed his best role since his short but VERY sweet supporting turn in Fight Club, seemingly likeable and fallible as the kind of easy-going co-worker anyone in the service industry would be THRILLED to have, but giving Bullet far more going on under the surface, while there are uniformly excellent performances from a top-shelf ensemble supporting cast which includes Josh Hartnett, Jeffrey Donovan (Burn Notice, Sicario), Andy Garcia, Laz Alonso (The Boys), Eddie Marsan, Niamh Algar (Raised By Wolves) and Darrell D’Silva (Informer, Domina), and a particularly edgy and intense turn from Scott Eastwood.  This is one of THE BEST thrillers of the year, by far, a masterpiece of mood, pace and plot that ensnares the viewer from its gripping opening and hooks them right up to the close, a triumph of the genre and EASILY Guy Ritchie’s best film since Snatch.  Regardless of whether or not it’s a RETURN to form, we can only hope he continues to deliver fare THIS GOOD in the future …

5.  FEAR STREET (PARTS 1-3) – Netflix have gotten increasingly ambitious with their original filmmaking over the years, and some of this years’ offerings have reached new heights of epic intention.  Their most exciting release of the summer was this adaptation of popular children’s horror author R.L. Stine’s popular book series, a truly gargantuan undertaking as the filmmakers set out to create an entire TRILOGY of films which were then released over three consecutive weekends.  Interestingly, these films are most definitely NOT for kids – this is proper, no-holds-barred supernatural slasher horror, delivering highly calibrated shocks and precision jump scares, a pervading atmosphere of insidious dread and a series of inventively gruesome kills.  The story revolves around two neighbouring small towns which have had vastly different fortunes over more than three centuries of existence – while the residents of Sunnyvale are unusually successful, living idyllic lives in peace and prosperity, luck has always been against the people of Shadyside, who languish in impoverishment, crime and misfortune, while the town has become known as the Murder Capital of the USA due to frequent spree killings.  Some attribute this to the supposed curse of a local urban legend, Sarah Fier, who became known as the Fier Witch after her execution for witchcraft in 1668, but others dismiss this as simple superstition.  Part 1 is set in 1994, as the latest outbreak of serial mayhem begins in Shadyside, dragging a small group of local teens – Deena Johnson (She Never Died’s Kiana Madeira) and Samantha Fraser (Olivia Scott Welch), a young lesbian couple going through a difficult breakup, Deena’s little brother Josh (The Haunted Hathaways’ Benjamin Flores Jr.), a nerdy history geek who spends most of his time playing video games or frequenting violent crime-buff online chatrooms, and their delinquent friends Simon (Eight Grade’s Fred Hechinger) and Kate (Julia Rehwald) – into the age-old ghostly conspiracy as they find themselves besieged by indestructible undead serial killers from the town’s past, reasoning that the only way they can escape with their lives is to solve the mystery and bring the Fier Witch some much needed closure.  Part 2, meanwhile, flashes back to a previous outbreak in 1977, in which local sisters Ziggy (Stranger Things’ Sadie Sink) and Cindy Berman (Emily Rudd), together with future Sunnyvale sheriff Nick Goode (Ted Sutherland) were among the kids hunted by said killers during a summer camp “colour war”.  As for Part 3, that goes all the way back to 1668 to tell the story of what REALLY happened to Sarah Fier, before wrapping up events in 1994, culminating in a terrifying, adrenaline-fuelled showdown in the Shadyside Mall.  Throughout, the youthful cast are EXCEPTIONAL, Madeira, Welch, Flores Jr., Sink and Rudd particularly impressing, while there are equally strong turns from Ashley Zuckerman (The Code, Designated Survivor) and Community’s Gillian Jacobs as the grown-up versions of two key ’77 kids, and a fun cameo from Maya Hawke in Part 1.  This is most definitely retro horror in the Stranger Things mould, perfectly executed period detail bringing fun nostalgic flavour to all three of the timelines while the peerless direction from Leigh Janiak (Honeymoon) and wire-tight, sharp-witted screenplays from Janiak, Kyle Killen (Lone Star, The Beaver), Phil Graziadel, Zak Olkewicz and Kate Trefry strike a perfect balance between knowing dark humour and knife-edged terror, as well as weaving an intriguingly complex narrative web that pulls the viewer in but never loses them to overcomplication.  The design, meanwhile, is evocative, the cinematography (from Stanger Things’ Caleb Heymann) is daring and magnificently moody, and the killers and other supernatural elements of the film are handled with skill through largely physical effects.  This is definitely not a standard, by-the-numbers slasher property, paying strong homage to the sub-genre’s rules but frequently subverting them with expert skill, and it’s as much fun as it is frightening.  Give us some more like this please, Netflix!

4.  THE SPARKS BROTHERS – those who’ve been following my reviews for a while will known that while I do sometimes shout about documentary films, they tend to show up in my runners-up lists – it’s a great rarity for one to land in one of my top tens.  This lovingly crafted deep-dive homage to cult band Sparks, from self-confessed rabid fanboy Edgar Wright (Shaun of the Dead, Hot Fuzz, Scott Pilgrim), is something VERY SPECIAL INDEED, then … there’s a vague possibility some of you may have heard the name before, and many of you will know at least one or two of their biggest hits without knowing it was them (their greatest hit of all time, This Town Ain’t Big Enough for the Both of Us, immediately springs to mind), but unless you’re REALLY serious about music it’s quite likely you have no idea who they are, namely two brothers from California, Russell and Ronald Mael, who formed a very sophisticated pop-rock band in the late 60s and then never really went away, having moments of fame but mostly working away in the background and influencing some of the greatest bands and musical artists that followed them, even if many never even knew where that influence originally came from. Wright’s film is an engrossing joy from start to finish (despite clocking in at two hours and twenty minutes), following their eclectic career from obscure inception as Halfnelson, through their first real big break with third album Kimono My Place, subsequent success and then fall from popularity in the mid-70s, through several subsequent revitalisations, all the way up to the present day with their long-awaited cinematic breakthrough, revolutionary musical feature Annette – throughout Wright keeps the tone light and the pace breezy, allowing a strong and endearing sense of irreverence to rule the day as fans, friends and the brothers themselves offer up fun anecdotes and wax lyrical about what is frequently a larger-than-life tragicomic soap opera, utilising fun, crappy animation and idiosyncratic stock footage inserts alongside talking-head interviews that were made with a decidedly tongue-in-cheek style – Mike Myers good-naturedly rants about how we can see his “damned mole” while 80s New Romantic icons Nick Rhodes and John Taylor, while shot together, are each individually labelled as “Duran”.  Ron and Russ themselves, meanwhile, are clearly having huge fun, gently ribbing each other and dropping some fun deadpan zingers throughout proceedings, easily playing to the band’s strong, idiosyncratic sense of hyper-intelligent humour, while the aforementioned celebrity talking-heads are just three amongst a whole wealth of famous faces that may surprise you – there’s even an appearance by Neil Gaiman, guys!  Altogether this is 2+ hours of bright and breezy fun chock full of great music and fascinating information, and even hardcore Sparks fans are likely to learn more than a little over the course of the film, while for those who have never heard of Sparks before it’s a FANTASTIC introduction to one of the greatest ever bands that you’ve never heard of.  With luck there might even be more than a few new fans before the year is out …

3.  GUNPOWDER MILKSHAKE – Netflix’ BEST offering of the summer was this surprise hit from Israeli writer-director Navot Papushado (Rabies, Big Bad Wolves), a heavily stylised black comedy action thriller that passes the Bechdel Test with FLYING COLOURS.  Playing like a female-centric John Wick, it follows ice-cold, on-top-of-her-game assassin Sam (Karen Gillan) as her latest assignment has some unfortunate side effects, leading her to take on a reparation job to retrieve some missing cash for the local branch of the Irish Mob.  The only catch is that a group of thugs have kidnapped the original thief’s little girl, 12 year-old Emily (My Spy’s Chloe Coleman), and Sam, in an uncharacteristic moment of sympathy, decides to intervene, only for the money to be accidentally destroyed in the process.  Now she’s got the Mob and her own employers coming after her, and she not only has to save her own skin but also Emily’s, leading her to seek help from the one person she thought she might never see again – her mother, Scarlet (Lena Headey), a master assassin in her own right who’s been hiding from the Mob herself for years.  The plot may be simple but at times also a little over-the-top, but the film is never anything less than a pure, unadulterated pleasure, populated with fascinating, living and breathing characters of real complexity and nuance, while the script (co-written by relative newcomer Ehud Lavski) is tightly-reined and bursting with zingers.  Most importantly, though, Papushado really delivers on the action front – these are some of the best set-pieces I’ve seen this year, Gillan, her co-stars and the various stunt-performers acquitting themselves admirably in a series of spectacular fights, gun battles and a particularly imaginative car chase that would be the envy of many larger, more expensive productions.  Gillan and Coleman have a sweet, awkward chemistry, the MCU star particularly impressing in a subtly nuanced performance that also plays beautifully against Headey’s own tightly controlled turn, while there is awesome support from Angela Bassett, Michelle Yeoh and Carla Gugino as Sam’s adoptive aunts Anna May, Florence and Madeleine, a trio of “librarians” who run a fine side-line in illicit weaponry and are capable of unleashing some spectacular violence of their own; the film’s antagonists, on the other hand, are exclusively masculine – the mighty Ralph Inneson is quietly ruthless as Irish boss Jim McAlester, while The Terror’s Adam Nagaitis is considerably more mercurial as his mad dog nephew Virgil, and Paul Giamatti is the stately calm at the centre of the storm as Sam’s employer Nathan, the closest thing she has to a father.  There’s so much to enjoy in this movie, not just the wonderful characters and amazing action but also the singularly engrossing and idiosyncratic style, deeply affecting themes of the bonds of found family and the healing power of forgiveness, and a rewarding through-line of strong women triumphing against the brutalities of toxic masculinity.  I love this film, and I invite you to try it out, cuz I’m sure you will too.

2.  THE SUICIDE SQUAD – the most fun I’ve had at the cinema so far this year is the long-awaited (thanks a bunch, COVID) redress of another frustrating imbalance from the decidedly hit and miss DCEU superhero franchise, in which Guardians of the Galaxy writer-director James Gunn has finally delivered a PROPER Suicide Squad movie after David Ayer’s painfully compromised first stab at the property back in 2016.  That movie was enjoyable enough and had some great moments, but ultimately it was a clunky mess, and while some of the characters were done (quite) well, others were painfully botched, even ruined entirely.  Thankfully Warner Bros. clearly learned their lesson, giving Gunn free reign to do whatever he wanted, and the end result is about as close to perfect as the DCEU has come to date.  Once again the peerless Viola Davis plays US government official Amanda Waller, head of ARGUS and the undisputable most evil bitch in all the DC Universe, who presides over the metahuman prisoners of the notorious supermax Belle Reve Prison, cherry-picking inmates for her pet project Taskforce X, the titular Suicide Squad sent out to handle the kind of jobs nobody else wants, in exchange for years off their sentences but controlled by explosive implants injected into the base of their skulls.  Their latest mission sees another motley crew of D-bags dispatched to the fictional South African island nation of Corto Maltese to infiltrate Jotunheim, a former Nazi facility in which a dangerous extra-terrestrial entity that’s being developed into a fearful bioweapon, with orders to destroy the project in order to keep it out of the hands of a hostile anti-American regime which has taken control of the island through a violent coup.  Where the first Squad felt like a clumsily-arranged selection of stereotypes with a few genuinely promising characters unsuccessfully moulded into a decidedly forced found family, this new batch are convincingly organic – they may be dysfunctional and they’re all almost universally definitely BAD GUYS, but they WORK, the relationship dynamics that form between them feeling genuinely earned.  Gunn has already proven himself a master of putting a bunch of A-holes together and forging them into band of “heroes”, and he’s certainly pulled the job off again here, dredging the bottom of the DC Rogues Gallery for its most ridiculous Z-listers and somehow managing to make them compelling.  Sure, returning Squad-member Harley Quinn (the incomparable Margot Robbie, magnificent as ever) has already become a fully-realised character thanks to Birds of Prey, so there wasn’t much heavy-lifting to be done here, but Gunn genuinely seems to GET the character, so our favourite pixie-esque Agent of Chaos is an unbridled and thoroughly unpredictable joy here, while fellow veteran Colonel Rick Flagg (a particularly muscular and thoroughly game Joel Kinnaman) has this time received a much needed makeover, Gunn promoting him from being the first film’s sketchily-drawn “Captain Exposition” and turning him into a fully-ledged, well-thought-out human being with all the requisite baggage, including a newfound sense of humour; the newcomers, meanwhile, are a thoroughly fascinating bunch – reluctant “leader” Bloodsport/Robert DuBois (a typically robust and playful Idris Elba), unapologetic douchebag Peacemaker/Christopher Smith (probably the best performance I’ve EVER seen John Cena deliver), and socially awkward and seriously hard-done-by nerd (and by far the most idiotic DC villain of all time) the Polka-Dot Man/Abner Krill (a genuinely heart-breaking hangdog performance from Ant-Man’s David Dastmalchian); meanwhile there’s a fine trio of villainous turns from the film’s resident Big Bads, with Juan Diego Botta (Good Behaviour) and Joaquin Cosio (Quantum of Solace, Narcos: Mexico) making strong impressions as newly-installed dictator Silvio Luna and his corrupt right hand-man General Suarez, although both are EASILY eclipsed by the typically brilliant Peter Capaldi as louche and quietly deranged supervillain The Thinker/Gaius Greives (although the film’s ULTIMATE threat turns out to be something a whole lot bigger and more exotic). The film is ROUNDLY STOLEN, however, by a truly adorable double act (or TRIPLE act, if you want to get technical) – Daniella Melchior makes her breakthrough here in fine style as sweet, principled and kind-hearted narcoleptic second-generation supervillain Ratcatcher II/Cleo Cazo, who has the weird ability to control rats (and who has a pet rat named Sebastian who frequently steals scenes all on his own), while a particular fan-favourite B-lister makes his big screen debut here in the form of King Shark/Nanaue, a barely sentient anthropomorphic Great White “shark god” with an insatiable appetite for flesh and a naturally quizzical nature who was brilliantly mo-capped by Steve Agee (The Sarah Silverman Project, who also plays Waller’s hyperactive assistant John Economos) but then artfully completed with an ingenious vocal turn from Sylvester Stallone. James Gunn has crafted an absolute MASTERPIECE here, EASILY the best film he’s made to date, a riotous cavalcade of exquisitely observed and perfectly delivered dark humour and expertly wrangled narrative chaos that has great fun playing with the narrative flow, injects countless spot-on in-jokes and irreverent but utterly essential throwaway sight-gags, and totally endears us to this glorious gang of utter morons right from the start (in which Gunn delivers what has to be one of the most skilful deep-fakes in cinematic history).  Sure, there’s also plenty of action, and it’s executed with the kind of consummate skill we’ve now come to expect from Gunn (the absolute highlight is a wonderfully bonkers sequence in which Harley expertly rescues herself from captivity), but like everything else it’s predominantly played for laughs, and there’s no getting away from the fact that this film is an absolute RIOT.  By far the funniest thing I’ve seen so far this year, and if I’m honest this is the best of the DCEU offerings to date, too (for me, only the exceptional Birds of Prey can compare) – if Warner Bros. have any sense they’ll give Gunn more to do VERY SOON …

1.  A QUIET PLACE, PART II – while UK cinemas finally reopened in early May, I was determined that my first trip back to the Big Screen for 2021 was gonna be something SPECIAL, and indeed I already knew what that was going to be. Thankfully I was not disappointed by my choice – 2018’s A Quiet Place was MY VERY FAVOURITE horror movie of the 2010s, an undeniable masterclass in suspense and sustained screen terror wrapped around a refreshingly original killer concept, and I was among the many fans hoping we’d see more in the future, especially after the film’s teasingly open ending.  Against the odds (or perhaps not), writer-director/co-star John Krasinski has pulled off the seemingly impossible task of not only following up that high-wire act, but genuinely EQUALLING it in levels of quality – picking up RIGHT where the first film left off (at least after an AMAZING scene-setting opening in which we’re treated to the events of Day 1 of the downfall of humanity), rejoining the remnants of the Abbott family as they’re forced by circumstances to up-sticks from their idyllic farmhouse home and strike out into the outside world once more, painfully aware at all times that they must maintain perfect silence to avoid the ravenous attentions of the lethal blind alien beasties that now sit at the top of the food chain.  Circumstances quickly become dire, however, and embattled mother Evelyn (Emily Blunt) is forced to ally herself with estranged family friend Emmett (Cillian Murphy), now a haunted, desperate vagrant eking out a perilous existence in an abandoned factory, in order to safeguard the future of her children Regan (Millicent Simmonds), Marcus (Noah Jupe) and their newborn baby brother.  Regan, however, discovers evidence of more survivors, and with her newfound weapon against the aliens she recklessly decides to set off on her own in the hopes of aiding them before it’s too late … it may only be his second major blockbuster as a director, but Krasinski has once again proven he’s a true heavyweight talent, effortlessly carving out fresh ground in this already magnificently well-realised dystopian universe while also playing magnificently to the established strengths of what came before, delivering another peerless thrill-ride of unbearable tension and knuckle-whitening terror.  The central principle of utilising sound at a very strict premium is once again strictly adhered to here, available sources of dialogue once again exploited with consummate skill while sound design and score (another moody triumph from Marco Beltrami) again become THE MOST IMPORTANT aspects of the whole production. The ruined world is once again realised beautifully throughout, most notably in the nightmarish environment of a wrecked commuter train, and Krasinski cranks up the tension before unleashing it in merciless explosions in a selection of harrowing encounters which guaranteed to leave viewers in a puddle of sweat.  The director mostly stays behind the camera this time round, but he does (obviously) put in an appearance in the opening flashback as the late Lee Abbott, making a potent impression which leaves a haunting absence that’s keenly felt throughout the remainder of the film, while Blunt continues to display mother lion ferocity as she fights to keep her children safe and Jupe plays crippling fear magnificently but is now starting to show a hidden spine of steel as Marcus finally starts to find his courage; the film once again belongs, however, to Simmonds, the young deaf actress once and for all proving she’s a genuine star in the making as she invests Regan with fierce wilfulness and stubborn determination that remains unshakeable even in the face of unspeakable horrors, and the relationship she develops with Emmett, reluctant as it may be, provides a strong new emotional focus for the story, Murphy bringing an attractive wounded humanity to his role as a man who’s lost anything and is being forced to learn to care for something again.  This is another triumph of the genre AND the artform in general, a masterpiece of atmosphere, performance and storytelling which builds magnificently on the skilful foundations laid by the first film, as well as setting things up perfectly for a third instalment which is all but certain to follow.  I definitely can’t wait.

[gyllenhaalstories]

BEST FRIEND!JAKE GYLLENHAAL HEADCANONS

notes: jake and you are bffs, that’s it, that’s the tweet! warnings: some mentions of sexual content, but it’s pretty clean and safe otherwise! the gifs were in a gif hunt so i don’t know who made them unfortunately! i suggest you listen to tongue tied by grouplove or dog days are over by florence + the machine!  i hope you guys enjoy! <3

Your friendship happened so out of the blue. You were at the grocery store with a friend and you picked some product up, reading the informations about it. You exclaimed “this comes from Canada”, you know, as one does while realizing Canada is a real country and not just a fantasy where everyone lives in igloos and chop wood and like wish Justin Trudeau good night. Your friend shrugged, very bored, but you heard a voice behind you. “Actually, I have some cool theory about Canada. Do you know the Ryans? Gosling and Reynolds? Well...”

“Canada had sex with America and they made the two of them and they’re twins and they tried to eat each other in the womb, but they didn’t, they survived...” You both spoke in sync. You turned around, only to realize that Jake Gyllenhaal was the one radiating even more chaotic energy than you.

It was signed, sealed and delivered.

You two were painful to be around. You would go on some random conspiracy theories of your own creation (you know Strawberry Shortcakes, like the toys and the shows for kids? Well they’re just Bratz dolls except for Bratz dolls, somebody confused the sugar with the salt and they ended up without feet and with some very large heads). You would argue about everything and nothing.

It was a 0 to 100 real quick.

You could be watching a movie at the cinema with a few friends, staying silent the whole time until you got back in the car and you just exploded with thoughts about the movie. You two were screaming so loud the driver of the car had to pull by the side of the road to try and keep you quiet like two angry children.

That’s what you two were: two very annoying children.

In Jake’s and yours opinion, you never argued. You just shared thoughts with a strong passion.

You could call each other names, but you never meant the insults you were saying.

“You can go suck a fuck”, “Tell me Y/N, how exactly does one suck a fuck? I’m all years”

Laughter. You guys laughed all the time together. No, wait, you laughed and Jake just wheezed. You took him to see a doctor once, you managed to convince him he might have a condition because no one ever wheezes THAT MUCH but it turns out you just both suffered from a great sense of humour.

For the first couple of months, your friendship was so filled with arguments and chaos that your mutuals thought you two actually hated each other.

But it could not be more wrong.

Jake and you were inseparable. You’d do everything and nothing together. You’d stop at the convenience store, share the newspaper, have a karaoke night (you were two Britney Spears stans), buy gifts for your respective relatives (you suspected that your own mother preferred your friend Jake to you). You spent the Holidays together. New Years, Valentine’s Day, even Halloween. You would host Halloween parties at your house. There would be only the two of you wearing matching costumes you made with clothes and craft supplies around the house. You both looked horrible, but you ate way too many candies to realize it.

You were attached by the hip. Wherever Jake went, you were there too.

At some point, you lost your job. It happens to the best of us. So Jake suggested you’d become his assistant.

In theory, it was a beautiful idea. You knew Jake’s schedule by heart and did everything together. Being paid for it? Sign me up.

But in practice...

It created some sort of tension between the two of you. It was one more reason to depend on Jake, and for Jake to depend on you. You were two peas in a pod but you had to manage the new pressure.

During red carpets you were hiding behind the interviewer or by his sides, taping your wrist to remind him to go faster and cut the long analytical speeches nobody really cared about. Except for you, you loved how insightful he was and how he rarely showed this side of his personality.

He knew when you were tired to just sit and watch the same people win awards for similar roles they did in other movies before.

Jake would lean in and say “Actually, I think Meryl Streep is a wizard, like the nice type, and she hides magical potions in her purse that can make you fly and don’t even get me started on Julia Roberts...”. You were too far gone, laughing so loud during an emotional speech when a not very talented celebrity won over very talented celebrities that deserved it more or during a movie premiere.

You would hold hands. For funsies.

He’d give you his jacket. He’d feed you a spoon of his food at the restaurant. You’d give him a sip of your hot chocolate on a cold winter evening. You’d share your comfy slippers with him even if his feet were too big and barely fit in.

Life without Jake? You simply did not remember what it was like.

Your mutual friends stopped calling you two enemies. You were straight up a married couple.

You’d go grocery shopping together and Jake would push the caddy around while you guide him through the aisles. “Could make you this dish, I know you like it” he’d suggest. “The oreos are on sale? Must get six packs of them, double stuff only” you’d add.

You’d go on car rides. They lead nowhere: a dead end street, a bridge under construction, a small ghost town. You both just sat there and listened to music.

His hand would mysteriously fall on your thigh and just stay there the whole way back.

And you’d give each other shy looks.

And giggle. And chuckle. And drop your keys by the front door, oopsies you were all of a sudden clumsy.

And when the door was closed behind you, you stared into each other’s eyes and just shrugged before ripping each other’s clothes at the speed of light and fucking on the couch, on the kitchen table or even on the floor. The bed was too far away.

You both had seen each other naked so many times it was not intimidating. You knew he was handsome, he knew you were beautiful. That was all you guys needed to know. But there were new infos to take in consideration: in bed, you two were just powerful. So you slept together again.

Again and again and again...

It did not bother any of you. Your friends did not even find out about it. Everything was fine.

Everything was fine until you went on a date with someone else. Two times, three times... It was starting to get serious.

Jake felt so weird. He hid it from you.

He caressed your hair when you cried as your new fling just broke up with you over text messages. He fed you your favourite ice cream while you two cuddled on the couch, trying to heal the pain with a wholesome Disney movie. He helped you get in the shower when you were too sad or too tired. He supported you.

He cared for you.

He loved you.

And he told you.

That one time he helped you get in the bathtub after you insisted you could go to the gym with him and he literally crushed you not even five minutes in. You were sore and tired and you thought you hallucinated when you heard the words: I love you.

He thought he was having a fever dream when you replied: I love you too.

[corinnesamuels]

Guarding the Gates Chapter 5: Desperation Makes a Man Do Terrible Things

Lily isn’t responding to James’ letters. In fact, she isn’t even opening them. She knows that he knows this because Sirius told her that he told him so. 

She knows that she’ll stop ignoring him eventually, but until then? He can sulk. 

She tells Remus as much one day when he calls her on the Floo. 

“You’re driving him crazy, you know.” Remus says. His voice holds no judgment, just the facts of the matter.

“He’s a full-grown wizard, Remus. He’ll be fine.” Lily sits cross-legged on the rug in front of her fireplace, lazily popping a crisp into her mouth and giving a cavalier shrug. 

“For whatever it’s worth, he agrees with you. He’s trying to figure out how to agree with you without pushing her away.”

“I know he does.” Lily rolls her eyes at the mention of her. “He wears his heart on his sleeve like he always has. My frustration lies in the fact that he allows her ridiculous comments to go on so often. If the shoe were on the other foot, I’d never allow—”

“What you once did?” Remus asks.

Lily stops, caught off guard by the statement. The Marauders rarely mentioned or referenced Severus Snape by choice anymore. She hasn’t heard anyone mention her former friend in several years, actually. But Lily knew that Remus was referencing how she had allowed Severus to share his inhospitable thoughts about James, though, at the time, she and James were only mildly friendly. They hadn’t become close until after she and Severus had stopped being friends. She slowly chews another crisp, mulling over Remus’ comment.

“This situation is different. And that was a long time ago.” 

Lily knows her words aren’t lies, but she also knows that Remus’ words aren’t either.

“It is, and it was.” Remus agrees fairly. “I only hope that you would remember it just enough to extend him some grace as he figures this out. He doesn’t want to lose either of you.”

Lily lets out an annoyed sigh. “I don’t understand how he can be with someone who doesn’t understand what’s happening. How is he not annoyed and frustrated by the way she thinks? How? When we’ve seen him hex people for less?”

Remus hesitates, tilting his head slightly. “I won’t weigh in on that. But I’d imagine people never know what they would do in a war until it’s on their doorstep. That’s where Miranda probably is. But he would lay his life down to protect you.” He catches her eye through the green flames in the fireplace. “You do know that? That we all would?”

“I wouldn’t allow it.” Lily says obstinately.

Remus chuckles. “It’s my understanding that you don’t always have a choice in the matter when the time comes.” She hears a door open and shut in the background, followed by heavy footsteps.

“Moony, have you seen . . . oh, who are you talking to?” a voice asks.

Lily rolls her eyes. “Really, Remus?”

Remus winces apologetically, and she sees James’ shins stiffen at hearing her voice. “I’m at Sirius’ place.” Remus says. “I didn’t know he was coming over this early.” 

“He’s right. I wasn’t due for another few hours.” James says. “But I’ll let the two of you have at it.” His tone is neutral, and Lily knows it’s forced.

She thinks about telling him thanks and carrying on her conversation with Remus but sighs heavily again instead. It’s been two weeks. She’d be lying if she said she didn’t miss him. “If you’d still like to talk, come through the Floo. I’m waiting on some treacle to finish up, so you might as well.”

She can only see just above his kneecaps, but she can tell his whole body relaxes at her words. Not only is treacle tart his favorite, but it is also the extent of her culinary prowess, potions skills be damned. Euphemia had taught her how to make it over the course of several lazy summer days at the manor, and while other recipes never seemed to stick, this one had. 

Lily hadn’t put much thought into why she decided to make treacle today. Until now, that is. Though the idea is unsettling, Lily realizes that even though she was angry with James and her feelings were bruised, she’d made it because she missed him. Her brain was just now catching up.

How many times had she made it while abroad? For the same exact reason?

James steps through her fireplace and dusts himself off. He looks uncertain as to where to sit or stand or even what to do with his hands. She remains seated at her place on the floor, silently looking up at him, knowing the uncomfortable silence was doing him in. Finally, she gestures at the space next to her, and he joins her on the floor.

James starts talking before he even makes it to the ground. “Lils, I’m so incredibly sorry. I didn’t mean for things to go as far as they did.” He says I wasn’t prepared for you and Miranda to be at odds, but I should have stepped in. I should have done more.”

“You should have.” Lily nods in agreement.

“I don’t agree with the things she’s said, Lily.” He runs a hand through his hair. “I didn’t realize that she didn’t see what was happening with Voldemort. I just assumed that she viewed things the same way the boys and I do. I’ve been trying to figure out how to handle the conversations with her, but I haven’t done a good enough job, clearly.” James lets out a heavy sigh. “I never meant for you to be hurt in the process. And I know that doesn’t change how it probably feels. I felt terrible about it. I still feel terrible about it.”

Lily watches as James’ gaze moves from her to the floor to other areas of her flat, as if he’s ashamed to look at her for too long. “I’m not asking you to pick me over her.” She responds, keeping her voice level. “I just want to not have to be the first person to step in and handle the situation every time. It’s exhausting to have to defend my kind against someone who seems to be woefully and purposefully misinformed.”

James sighs again. “I won’t argue against that. But I talked to her, and I think she’s starting to get it now. There was an article in the Prophet last week and—well . . .” He clears his throat. “It opened her eyes to some things. But you haven’t been wrong. And I owe you an apology for letting things escalate without stepping up. You deserve more from me as a friend. You’ll get more.”

She ponders this for a moment as he holds her gaze, longer this time than before. She has no goodwill left in her for Miranda, but she trusts James to stick to his word. She scans his face and eyes before extending a pinky toward him. James is confused at first, but as his mind catches up, he laughs and links it with a pinky of his own.

“Pinky swear?” she asks.

“Pinky swear.” He confirms. She notices that his whole demeanor has changed, his shoulders look lighter, and the distressed look she’d seen when he came through her fireplace has given way to a soft smile. It looks better on him.

“So, catch me up then. What’s new in your world since I last opened one of your letters?” she asks. James looks as if he wants to roll his eyes but doesn’t want to push his luck.

He fills her in on Puddlemere’s new Seeker and his hopes for how it will increase their chances for the English Cup before sharing how excited and anxious he is to begin practicing with the rest of the English team in the World Cup. She can’t help but smile as he describes it, she’d always loved watching his eyes light up when he talked about Quidditch. He asks about her, and she tells him about her recent trip to the cinema with Dorcas and Mary to see the newest installment of their favorite spy film series.

“That Band bloke? The less dashing, less talented James?” he scoffs in jest. Lily rolls her eyes and pushes his shoulder.

“It’s Bond, James, and don’t act like you don’t know it.”

    Now that Lily and James had made up, it felt as if all of their friends were breathing a little easier, though some of it may have to do with the fact that Miranda was around less and less, and never when Lily was present. Sometimes that meant that James had to leave early to take her to dinner, or sometimes missed hanging out altogether, but no one complained.

With the tension in their group diminished, it becomes more and more difficult for Remus to hide his struggles. He’s beginning to look thinner, and his clothes more threadbare. Lily knows that he’s painting it as the usual side effects of an approaching full moon, but Lily isn’t fooled. His latest job had gotten suspicious of his monthly absences and decided that it was best that they part ways. 

That was two months ago. He hadn’t yet managed to find work again.

Lily mentions this to James and Sirius as she brews a few healing potions to help Remus’ recovery after the upcoming full moon. Peter is at work, and Remus, getting progressively more ill as the full moon looms closer, is at his flat attempting to rest up, though they all know that there is no rest to be found until after the full moon passes. 

“Sirius, did you come to pick up these potions and salves for Remus, or did you come to eat all of my snacks?” She asks dryly as he helps himself to the various wares in her scullery. 

“I believe it’s what the muggles call ‘two birds with one stone,’ Red.” Sirius replies. Lily rolls her eyes as James attempts to stifle a laugh. 

“Sirius and I have both offered to support him, but he won’t take it.” James says, going back to the conversation at hand.

“His pride is making it very difficult.” Sirius grumbles.

“Your pride would make things difficult too if you were worried about being a burden.” Lily points out. “Is there a way we could subtly get him to take help?”

“You mean tricking him into it?” James asks.

“It sounds distasteful when you say it like that.” She frowns.

“Call it whatever you want, Evans, but you might be onto something.” James responds as he begins pacing. “I could talk to Dad and make Sunday tea at the manor a more regular occurrence.” 

“We could also drop food and things off at his door and disapparate before he has time to reject them.” Sirius offers as he pops a pretzel into his mouth. 

“Oh! I could ‘accidentally’ overcook meals a few times a week!” Lily says, proud of her excellent idea. “Surely Remus won’t let the food go to waste.”

James stops pacing, and the pretzel Sirius had begun tossing into his mouth misses, hitting him in the eye instead. The two men exchange looks before James opens and closes his mouth, trying to find the right words.

“Lily you have so many great qualities—” James says, eventually.

“Amazing, really—” Sirius adds. 

“I’ve seen you do things with a cauldron people could only dream of doing—” James continues.

“Most mortal men can only begin to fathom—”

“But when it comes to your cooking . . .”

“It’s absolutely dreadful.” Sirius says, shaking his head slowly.

Lily’s jaw drops, and James’ eyes grow wide behind his glasses. “Er . . . I was going to say that it wouldn’t be playing to your strengths.”

Sirius either ignored or didn’t catch James’ attempt at diplomacy. “I’ve never seen such a disparity between potion-making and cooking. Fascinating, really.”

“Are you quite finished?” Lily asks tightly.

Read the rest at ao3!

Start from the beginning

[incantavaxx]

Episode 10

(I fell asleep yesterday so now I can say that I didn’t watch the entire season in a day, my dignity is saved.)

- YES LET’S KEEP DRAGGING CANEPALLO TO THE GROUND, it’s what he deserves. Also how adorable is it that Nicholas is actually super talented in real life too and he has an instagram page for his drawings?

SEE? I knew there was a reason for the cat thing, fuck Raffaele (who is coincidentally my ex’s name too). And omg her father just called her FAT I can’t, I’m so glad she has Luchino they’re so cute Silvia season when.

- I waited ALL MY LIFE for a Giovanni Garau Wizard of Love clip and they’re really gonna fucking ruin it with EMMA COVITTI THE VILLAIN and MORE ELIA/SANA BULLSHIT, is this happening??? BESSE WHAT DID I EVER DO TO YOU I DID NOTHING BUT LOVE AND SUPPORT YOU WHY DO YOU HATE M- I TAKE IT BACK, BESSE YOU NEVER DID ANYTHING WRONG, EVER, THIS IS THE BEST CLIP EVER- “canecazzo”, CANECAZZO, everyone has been slandering his name this entire season and no one but HIM could finally reach the final superior level, Federico CANECAZZO. Poetic. Cinema.

Marti SHUT UP, we do not recall the good things that Canecazzo did, we HATE him this season, also he was only good because Rich King Incanti was there to lead the way (the way towards the chair), now that he’s alone he showed his true colors.

“It’s two years that I wait, get in line.” YOU TELL HIM GIO YOU TELL HIM. AND LET’S BE CLEAR MISTER CANECAZZO, WHEN YOU’RE IN LINE AFTER GIOVANNI GARAU IT MEANS THAT YOUR TURN IS NOT COMING IN THIS LIFE.

Thank you Besse for this, in OG Jonas eventually helps Chris but the Wizard of Love is superior and doesn’t stand for that type of shit.

- IT WAS DOCTOR SPERA ALL ALONG, HE MADE HER DO IT AND HE WON A WINE KSKSK I’m so emotional seeing NAMACISSI behind him btw.

- I started hearing “Elettra, Elettra Lamborghini” before the POV changed and I wonder for a second who it was going to be and OF COURSE IT’S FILIPPO SAVA WITH ELETTRA LAMBORHINI, who else could it be, iconic. “What do you know what Edo does when you’re not there?” No we all know Filo, he cries in the shower and dresses all emo until Ele comes back, that’s it. My babies, I miss them so much, who would have thought that the real heartbreaking long distance relationship would have been the one between brother and sister here.

- Is it normal that I cried reading NICCOLÒ on the screen, yes? Just asking. “I’m just sad you don’t like the sweater I gave you.” “I didn’t say I didn’t like it, I said it’s…peculiar.” Marti is such a little shit omg I need to see the sweater. FUCKING FISHERMAN COME HERE IF YOU HAVE THE GUT COME HERE AND SEE HOW MANY SLAPS I HAVE LEFT, I’LL SLAP YOU WITH YOUR OWN FISHES YOU SUCKER-so sweet how Nicco is able to calm Marti down BUT MARTI MY CHILD DOGE NICCO AND SPRINT TOWARDS THE FISHERMAN GO GO GO DESTROY HIM-In other words, I am not the one friend you want at your side to keep you calm and avoid a fight.  

- I’m forever thankful to Besse for saying “a clip for Canecazzo? Not on my watch” but I’m also incredibly PISSED that he gave it to Luchino not because I don’t love Luchino with all my heart but because they could have just done it with Silvia’s clip since they were together and give Canecazzo clip to someone ELSE that we actually NEVER see NEVER-you all know where I’m going with this I won’t even say, just know that my most chaotic disaster son deserves better.

- Fede, do not apologize to them, do not approach, do not befriend them, HEADBUT THEM. (I’m not the forviging type)

- I SCREAMED I KEEP SCREAMING I HAD TO PAUSE AND TEXT MY FRIEND TO SCREAM SOME MORE ELIA AND FILIPPO ARE MOVING IN TOGETHER I REPEAT ELIA AND FILIPPO ARE MOVING IN TOGETHER CAN YOU IMAGINE THE CHAOS THAT HOUSE WILL BE, CAN YOU IMAGINE SEASON 5 ELIA LIVING WITH FILIPPO, I-

-But seriously how do we go from crack ship that never ever ever interacted, to crack ship that never ever interacted but in which one said that would fuck the other one immediately, to THEY’RE MOVING IN TOGETHER BESSE REALLY SAID LET’S GIVE THE FANDOM EVERYTHING THEY WANT

- He literally knew we were going to hate him so much for the Sana/Elia thing and made us suffer the entire season just to HIT us at the end he’s so mean I love him

- AND FILIPPO EVEN HIT ON HIM AND ELIA GIGGLED ALL FLATTERED NETFLIX I HOPE YOU’RE ALREADY KNOCKING ON MISS ANDEM’S DOOR WITH YOUR ELIPPO SEASON 5

- ALSO CAN WE TALK ABOUT HOW RAMI IS ABOUT TO ENTER THE ROOM, THEN STOP, SEES THAT ELIA AND FILIPPO ARE TALKING AND IMMEDIATELY WALKS AWAY NOT TO INTERRUPT THIS LEGENDARY MOMENT, HE KNOWS

- Also Elia mentions wanting to go away from his father and like?? Did Besse read all the fanfictions? Is this what Netflix wanted the fanfiction for?

- Anyway I would like to thank not only God but also Ludovico Bessegato

- I TAKE IT BACK IMMEDIATELY WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU, WHY WOULD YOU GIVE ELIA A CLIP AND PUT EMMA COVITTI IN IT, WHAT ARE YOU SUGGESTING BESSE, STOP, THANK GOD GIO FOR AT LEAST TRYING TO STOP THE MADNESS BUT WHEN A MAD MEN LIKE BESSE HATES A FANDOM LIKE HE HATES US NOT EVEN THE WIZARD OF LOVE CAN STOP IT.

- Also, even putting my Elippo feelings aside, what kind of bullshit is that anyway? Can Elia be an actual human being with a brain or does he have to just immediately pursues every single girl, like he was watching Sana two seconds before and now he’s all over Covitti, like Besse what the fuck leave him alone.

- (I’m telling you, if you plan on making Elia/Covitti a thing in a possible season 5 YOU CAN KEEP IT)

- I’m so pissed, where is Rich King Incanti, only he can calm me down.

- KIDDING GIOEVA ENDGAME WORKS JUST AS FINE KSKSKS 

“Without me and you, there would have never been that group of people that slowly created around us” This is Besse saying Gio and Eva started the cycle and Gio and Eva end it DO YOU HEAR ME CRYING.

Things Besse will be sued for: no Edoardo Incanti clip (like???? Why??? He was there anyway at the end, couldn’t they just film something quick???), Elia and Covitti clip existing (at least they didn’t kiss and she was NOT in the last scene so that means that nothing happened thank you very much), they didn’t make Sana sing (WHAT WAS THAT IN BESSE IG STORIES WHERE BEA WAS SINGING IMAGINE, DOES HE JUST LIKE TO TEASE US??? She sings all the time on her IG and she has a beautiful voice, why didn’t they do the karaoke scene with her???).

Things Besse will not be sued for: Gio delivering the speech at the end with the scenes of all of them together making me cry like a baby and literally every single thing in this season.

Now: SEASON 5 WHEN.

[79chevyimpala]

Impromptu Movie Night

Bucky remembers when a movie night was actually a date, to which Shuri scoffs at him and his blatant attempt to make fun of her.  "Seriously Shuri."  She just rolls her eyes at the man out of time as she runs her scans or whatever it is she does, Bucky still isn't quite sure.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/27661616

Bucky remembers when a movie night was actually a date, to which Shuri scoffs at him and his blatant attempt to make fun of her.  "Seriously Shuri."  She just rolls her eyes at the man out of time as she runs her scans or whatever it is she does, Bucky still isn't quite sure.   To be honest, he doesn't care because whatever she's doing, he hasn't felt this good in decades.  He puts his "himness" (a term he's decided to use to encompass . . . well . . . basically life) about on par with his time as a POW with the Howling Commandos before they were the Howling Commandos.  "Before I left Brooklyn for the war, if a guy wanted to have a movie night with a dame, he'd have to take her to the cinema, spend a quarter for her ticket, and a dime for a bag of popcorn from a street vendor before going in." Shuri recognized the look of nostalgia and realized Bucky was telling her the truth.  "What was the last movie you saw before the war?" "Captain Caution," Bucky answered and Shuri cocked an eyebrow at him.  "Stevie liked the swashbucklers adventure type of movies.  We were there for him anyway, so I always let him pick."  He gave her a shrug and a 'what can you do?' kind of look. "Stevie is Captain Rogers, right?"  Bucky just nods.  "Okay, so why were you there for him?  You told me before you enjoy movies, but that sounds like you don't," Shuri said all this while she still tinkered away, and Bucky realized that even though she may be young nothing got passed her. "I do enjoy movies, but back then Steve didn't look like he does now and he was 180 degrees health-wise."  Shuri just nodded that time.  She knew about the Super Soldier serum and that it built up his mass, but she didn't know it fixed his health.   Like he was reading her mind, he continued, "Yeah, that serum saved his life.  If there had been no Hydra, and the war was just a war over in five years, I probably maybe could have made it home.  Steve probably wouldn't have survived." "How did going to the movies help his health?" "One of the things Steve had was really horrible asthma.  Turns out summertime in Brooklyn ain't too good for your lungs when you've got bad lungs.  I don't know if they all had it in 1940, but there was one theater in Times Square that had air conditioning; so on really humid days we'd sit in that theater for as long as we could just so Steve could breathe.  "And, if we happen to go in cooler weather I picked the movie." By that point Shuri gave up on the pretense of working.  She loved technology, but she craved knowledge, and here was a walking, talking, history book.  "And what was a typical Bucky Barnes pick?" "Son of Frankenstein, Stagecoach, The Wizard of Oz . . . we both had a thing for Judy Garland.  And a lot of Charlie Chan movies.  I even got Steve to go see Gone with the Wind."  That got a look from Shuri, "What?  I read the book and was curious.  Also it was in color-" "Wait, wait, I know someone who had to watch everything in Black and White?" "Two someones, yes." Shuri was practically buzzing as she walked away from Bucky.  She was essentially racing through her lab while Bucky sat there even more confused than usual.  In less than 10 minutes Shuri had a room that Bucky never noticed before, set up with a massive amount of popcorn on a coffee table in front of a really comfy looking couch; coffee, soda, and beer at the ready to drink, and opposite all of this a large white screen hanging on the wall.  She came back grabbed Bucky's hand, dragged into the room, shoved him down on the couch, shut the door, turned off the lights, and from her wrist thingy started a projector built into the ceiling  And then lastly, she plopped down next to Bucky on the couch on the side missing the arm.  "Movie night has officially begun Bucky Barnes!  We've got popcorn and drinks now, and the kitchen is going to bring us food after the first movie."   "First movie?  How many are we watching?  And is this even appropriate?" Bucky was anxious. "Only two.  They're from the 80s so they're like short.  And okay fine, you may be like a hundred years old technically, but you're really like what 26-27 right; and that's not counting the times you were awake for Hydra missions.  And I'm 17, anything up to a decade either way is not considered a big deal in age difference.  T'Challa the king, and my mother the queen trust us to be alone together, and we're just watching movies; because I know you are smart enough to know that if you try to do anything to me as Bucky, you'll be dead dead before you hit the floor.  If your mind slips and you become the Winter Soldier you'll just be dead, but in a way I can fix." "Understood." "Good, cuz I think you're going to really like these movies!" "I trust you, Shuri." "As well you should pretty boy.  So, we have Who Framed Roger Rabbit? but first, Tremors!"

@comfortember

[malereader-inserts]

Driving Me Wild

Fandom: Harry Potter Pairing: Cedric Diggory x Male!Reader Summary: Cedric pure and sweet, totally wild for you Word Count: 1,222 Request: “could you do a Cedric Diggory imagine with “you were in my dream last night.”” A/n: I fall in love for Cedric then I remember he’s DEAD, baby boy deserves better

“You’ve never been to Muggle London?”

Wide eyes as you stared at your boyfriend, it was the nearing of the end of your fifth year at Hogwarts. Cedric shakes his head and shrugs his shoulders as he fixed your blue and silver tie.

“Come stay with me for the summer, I already agreed I was going to the Quidditch World Tournament, if I’m meeting your family in August, you’re meeting my family too.”

“Alright, I’ll have to send a letter first to my family, they have to know,” Cedric laughs as you grinned at him.

You were definitely lucky to be with Cedric, he has boys and girls fawning over him. You weren’t surprised at all, Cedric has a heart of gold. In your eyes, he was adorable, sure you have to tutor him in some subjects but he was always determined. Him being good looking was just a bonus.

You two were a well-loved couple within Hogwarts, despite many whispers of people gushing over you two, you and he were in it for the long run.

“I have to go,” You responded, “Study date before our potion exam?”

“I’ll hold you to that.”

The pair of you grinned before lightly pecking him on the lips, his smile turned into a grin as you swung your legs over the bench and leaving the great hall. Cedric was a man of many things, a whipped man is one of them.

Being with you was a fantastic start to the summer, Cedric loved your family as did your family love him. Coming from a pure-blood family, he’s only explored the magical world but you got the best of both worlds.

One magical parent and one muggle parent, Cedric was fascinated with all different objects around your house, he found your bedroom like a little toy shop as it was full of foreign objects to him.

The first week, you took him out to multiple dates, the cinema to the bowling alley. To simply going to the gelato shop for some ice cream, even though you were aware that the wizarding world had ice cream for some reason Cedric claims it’s different. 

Walking down muggle London was different, a whole new experience.

Holding hands, you wearing an oversized striped burgundy and white flannel over a white shirt whilst he sported double denim, which you hold him against, though he likes to claim he could be the only person who could pull off double denim.

“In your dreams love,” You teased, as you gently pushed his face to turn the other way, “Come on, if we get on the double-decker, it’ll give us a tour of London.”

Cedric loved every minute being with you, from the crazy shopping to the wild activities to the incredible sightseeing. Holding hands and kissing in the London Eye, as Cedric gush about how pretty London looked from such a height. Within a week, he’s seen it all, you’ve taken pictures of him and found various other older wizards mingling around London who happily take wizard pictures of you two at the tourist attractions.

A treasured wizard picture was of you two kissing in the London Eye with Big Ben in the background.

You took still muggle pictures of him in the London Museum, claiming with a face like his, he was art too. 

“You’ll be history, Ced,” You say, waiting for the picture to form and showing it to him, his chin resting on your shoulder with his arms wrapped around you.

“I don’t think I would be,” Cedric confessed, “I’m still confused to what I want to do when I’m older.”

“Quidditch player,” You suggested, “You look pretty good out in the field.”

“Well, whatever I do, I hope I still have you by my side.”

“You’ll always have me,”

“I know.”

You two headed back home, after having dinner out. It was dark but your family trusted you two to get back home safely, you did have a phone if you ever got lost. Luckily, you didn’t live too far away from the centre of London. Taking the bus journey and walking the rest home was enough.

The dark summer night upon the two of you, giggling like school children, trying not to fall on the way home as Cedric tries to jump on your back. Whilst you were given dirty looks for being two boys in love, you had each other’s back and that’s all you care was Cedric. 

Kissing up against fences and walls on the way home, scrunching your nose up as he returns to action, staring into his eyes and biting your lips.

“You’re adorable.”

“Could say the same thing about you.”

You two had it good, everything was working in your favour. His hands moving up your back under your shirt. His cold hands compared to your hot skin. Pushing him away, rolling your eyes bt a fond smile was unmissable as you jump on his back.

His hands holding you up as he spins you around, under the street lights. Having fun despite just being you two. Cedric drops you, landing on your feet.

“Weak,” You exclaimed, “I carried you for five minutes before giving up!”

“Maybe, I rather see your face,” Cedric offers as you looked at him with a gaping mouth, scoffing.

“Alright, smooth man,” You teased, allowing him to put his arm over your shoulder.

You both walk down in the middle of the road of your neighbourhood. No cars or peering eyes to ruin your walk home. Just you and him, with your mp3 player blasting hits you’ve missed through the year you were out at Hogwarts. 

“You know, you were in my dream last night,” Cedric confessed, you looked at him with a raised eyebrow.

“Well, elaborate?” 

You both stopped, noticing how you were at your home. He faces you and your home, you looked at him expectedly. Your hands intertwined with yours, falling in love with you over again as he stares into your eyes. The corner of his lips quirked upwards into a soft gentle smile.

Soft laughter escapes him, shaking his head slightly, “I dreamed a future with you, married and all.”

“With kids, we’ve adopted?” You asked with a smile that melted his heart.

“No, not yet,” But he doesn’t deny that he does want kids, “Fresh out of Hogwarts maybe, two or three years after graduating. You’ve got a job and I’ve got a job.”

“Married,” You breathed, “We’re a little young to talk about marriage, don’t you think? We’re only sixteen, well, you’re almost seventeen since your birthday is in September.”

“Most wizards marry young,” Cedric proposed, “And you drive me wild.”

Your heart was beating ten times louder and faster, “So do you, but, we’re only going to be in the sixth year, ask me again after our seventh year.”

Cedric was probably blushing, pressing his lips against yours. Passionate, slow and full of meaning. A kiss like that was everything, both your minds pausing their train of thoughts because all you cared about was each other.

No matter how much he drove you crazy in both ways, mad and madly in love. You couldn’t see any other person in your future but him, no one could have a love for you like Cedric does.

“I’ll hold you to that.”

[drferox]

What movie have you seen recently that you really enjoyed?

So the LSB and I binge watched all the Marvel movies recently that I hadn’t seen, because I don’t really go and see many movies at the cinema, up until Endgame. And I had opinions.

So Dr Strange... I’m not sure the character has any redeeming features. His sterile technique is bad, his bedside manners are bad, he’s got arrogance leaking out of his oversized asshole. Sure, he paid for some of that, but not convinced at all that he learned from it. Love the cape though.

Spider-Man is baby. He is such baby. He needs milk and cookies and handmade mittens and maybe a puppy. Could do with half a dozen more brain cells, but is only baby.

The Antman movies I quite liked, flawed humans but with multiple redeeming features where appropriate and effort put into their redemption. Just fudge the science, it’s not meant to be for heavy thinking. I appreciate that he took the effort to name as many ants as possible.

Black Panther’s worldbuilding was simply superb and I don’t have another word for it.

Captain Marvel captured the 90’s feel really well, and I appreciated multiple homages to other movies at that time. Feel like maybe didn’t have enough time in a non-brainwashed state to establish a personality strongly, but was getting there. Also bonus points for Goose the ‘cat’.

Infinity War and Endgame were just kind of a mess. There were so many potentially interesting concepts being juggled about, and they just dropped so many of them.

It starts of with Loki not being Loki-like at all? He’s supposed to be clever and trickster-y, and there he does the most blatantly transparent and foolish move for no apparent reason? That’s such an out of character event and profoundly unsatisfying.

The whole chasing the wizard scene did absolutely nothing for me, just looked like an excuse for fancy effects. Dr Strange is supposed to be very clever. It’s not enough to state a character is clever, you really have to show it to us somehow.

Peter Quill could have had more quality interactions with Spider Man. Pop culture references and so on.

I have to conclude the stuff about ‘Soul stone demands a sacrifice of someone you love’ thing is completely false. Either it demands sacrifice of someone who is loved, but not by the sacrificer, or a feeling of regret, or just any old death will do. Tried to be deep and meaningful but failed.

The whole attempt to save Vision felt a bit flat too. He is, when all is said and done, one person. And while our hero’s did not want to sacrifice one person, they willingly staged a whole battle and lost how many lives in the attempt? Especially when there was so much at stake.

It’s such a busy movie, trying to juggle all these ideas, and in the end it just dropped so many of them uncerimoniously.

Infinity War didn’t really pick up those dropped concepts either. It was really just a send off for a few long term characters. It was at least a little more clever with the time heist, though I was still waiting to see a single clever thing from Dr Strange, maybe sending a message with advice into the future? To make the team realise time hijinks were an option at all?

At least Loki was more in character, but Thor was treated quite badly and I didn’t appreciate the passive aggressive dig from his mother after she’d already acknowledged the years had been hard on him. Seriously, if a character is supposed to be insightful, wise and kind, the salad line was not called for at all.

Thanos as a villain is frustrating because he’s really not clever. His philosophy is warped and falls apart with the slightest critical thinking and yet he has accumulated so much power, how? By throwing punches? How did he even start, he has no charisma and no logical thoughts. There’s nothing to empathise with, nothing to be intrigued by, no shades of grey, nothing at all to make him interesting. Amateur DM’s make better villains than that every day, and this is what the franchise was building towards?

Well, I’ve watched it now.

[expression-in-its-essence]

The Goldfinch movie.

7 min 26 secs in : Why the fuck did they start the movie like that. Why didn't the explosion take place? Theo's mom's apartment? His anxiety? Also.. why do they keep cutting the scenes abruptly? They ain't tweets... No limit.. then??

8 min 2 sec in : Okay they went to the apartment. Audrey's sweater deserved more screen time. The lipstain on the mug in focus *chef's kiss* poetic cinema!

9 min 19 sec in : Do you see what I see? Tom Cable's face has a stark resemblance to Boris's face. Did Theo have a crush on him?

9 min 54 sec in : Mr Barbour's hand is shaking. I like that they put it in there. He was sick. Nice. (I'd imagined Audrey's apartment building entrance like they showed the Barbour's apartment building entrance. Wild.)

11 min 8 sec in : Don't shove it into his face that y'all are fancy okay? He's not used to that life style. He didn't have maids making his bed. ARE YOU GIVING HIM DRUGS, MRS BARBOUR? But you just glared at your husband for offering him the same sort of thing?? Oh God. Poor child. "it's perfectly understandable" my ass. You gave him meds just because your sleep was getting affected.

14 min 39 sec : Woah woah woah Theo wtf you're so smol how'd you do that? Also... Again. The frame of Theo and Tom standing close and Theo and Boris standing close when they kissed, Theo is wearing the same damn sweater.

16 min 58 sec in : Ayyyy Jeffery Wright!

20 min 33 sec in : "He drank a lot", Theo about his dad. Honey just wait up, you will too. (The grilled sandwich and the cute lil smile 😍 also this is the first time since the movie started that Oakes' voice isn't deep.)

23 min 54 sec in : Wizard of Oz poster, I see you!

24 min 19 sec in : I love how Oakes is expressing being caught off guard. Theo knows he did something bad and every time he's dealing with something he didn't expect to deal with, he's like OMG THEY KNOW ABOUT THE PAINTING AND IM FUCKED even if no one knows.

25 min 1 sec in : The glasses made a difference. He went from mature to cute. Angry bird to angry birb.

25 min 44 sec in : Another sweater? Or was this THE sweater of Audrey? (Off topic but Oakes is hella cute. I could murder anyone who hurts him.)

29 min 9 sec in : Pippa doesn't remember or doesn't wanna remember? There was something in her eyes that was hard to read. Also, why doesn't anyone say 'I'm sorry about your mom' to Theo? Do Americans not care? It's weird to see no response when he tells people that Audrey is dead.

31 min 17 sec in : "The Goldfinch, destroyed"? Then why is Theo upset. Good riddance. Oh yeah. I know why. It's Donna Tartt we're talking about.

32 min 39 sec in : Hobie just casually predicting the future. "It's only fake if you pass it on as an original". Theo's like, "noted, gonna do exactly that".

34 min 16 sec in : Why does Theo write like a five year old child? That's toddler handwriting! And omg all the Andy-prom-dress memes are making sense now. (Also did I mention that Mrs Barbour seems more selfish in the film than she does in the book. Like hey I'm putting up with this kid because he helps my kid. He's serving a purpose for me. What the hell.) (How old is Andy anyway? He looks younger than Theo. I think he's different. Didn't grow up like other kids. That was mentioned in the book right?)

35 min 20 sec in : Ayyy Hobie's earring!

35 min 49 sec in : He shopped for himself? Nice! Didn't know kids could shop without adult supervision in the West. (Because they can't in the East.)

35 min 50 sec in : Ayyyy Sarah Paulson! Damn she's hot. How can you dislike her? *heart eyes*

37 min 30 sec in : I can't bring myself to hate Luke Wilson since Skeleton Twins but SHUT THE FUCK UP LARRY! AUDREY DESERVED BETTER. Look at how Larry and Xandra are looking at the place like they're vultures.

39 min 34 sec : They got the airport scene right. STOP GIVING HIM DRUGS WTH IS WRONG WITH THE ADULTS IN THIS MOVIE!

41 min 12 sec in : Ayyy Popper!!!!!

43 min 27 sec in : It just dawned on Theo that he's alone. Oh god. My poor baby.

45 min 12 sec in : Let me take this moment to say that Ashleigh Cummings is pretty. And I finally get why y'all were pissed at the non linear storyline and the weird voiceovers. Guess I'd been prepared for that so it didn't really suck that much.

49 min 30 sec in : I'd imagined Boreo reunion like the Platt Theo reunion. In the day. Dang it. Also... Adult Platt Barbour was not supposed to be good looking? In the book?

55 min 34 sec in : Without context, none of it could make sense. Apologies to whoever didn't read the book beforehand. Crowley fucked this up.

58 min in : Ayyyy Finn Wolfhard! BORIS IS HERE AND IM SO EXCITED IDK WHY

1 hour in : It's such a Boris thing to leave the bag unzipped.

1 hour 3 min 20 sec in : Slumdog Millionaire's Jai Ho (2008) is playing in the background. The only song that I've recognized so far. Wow. Lets me know about the time setting. Nice.

1 hr 3 min in : Someone gif " That cost twenty dollars!" *Stare* "That would have cost twenty dollars!"

1 hr 8 min in : So Boris's room is exactly like I had imagined but Theo's room isn't. Boris just mentioned Kotku though.

1 hr 9 min 14 sec in : Isn't it hella hot in Vegas? Why are they wearing sweaters? Or does drug intake make you more vulnerable to the environment?

1 hr 10 min 15 sec in : Xandra Theo argument : gold. "Cocktail sausages that you like." I wanna laugh in Crowley's face. What was he thinking?? Omg I'm dying.

1 hr 11 min 17 sec in : The slap sound didn't work??

1 hr 13 min 53 sec in : I like serious Boris better.

1 hr 14 min in : The slum house Audrey dream thing was not in the book. That's an entirely new addition.

1 hr 18 min 26 sec in : The Welty Theo scene is awesome. The sound effects work. I feel suffocated. The ambulance noise fiasco is also nicely pulled off. (also Theo's Yellow bag was dirty af then how did it get all clean when he didn't even do anything to it?)

1 hr 20 min 57 sec in : Shhhh Potter.

1 hr 22 min in : Holy shit he got slapped twice!! Ouch! And Larry's audacity to tell Theo to stop with the crying?? Good thing he died. Asshole.

1 hr 25 min in : "You don't tell me a lot of things but that's okay". I see what you did there, Boris. Which was of course, I love you.

1 hr 26 min in : "Act normal" - Theo knows his way around drugs pretty well, doesn't he?

1 hr 30 min in : "No family No friends" line punched me in the face. (Also awww popchik's excuse was the last resort for Boris to make Theo stay.)

1 hr 31 min 17 sec in : That pause after "What do you have to tell me?". You can clearly see Boris struggling to hold something back. Which was of course, I love you.

1 hr 31 min 34 sec in : What the fuck is that music? Oh heyyyyyy they kissed!-- he fucking runs away?? Also what kind of a kangaroo runs like that? (Yes, the taxi driver watched. I don't have to wonder anymore.) (They didn't address why he took the bus instead of flying?)

1 hr 33 min in : I didn't imagine Welty's room like that at all. Also why doesn't Hobie seem happy to see Theo again?

1 hr 35 min in : Longer stretches of one storyline are kinda bearable. From drugs in storage unit to waking up beside Kitsey. We got Vegas and Young Theo. Nice. (Also, who the heck puts jewelry in shoes? Is Theo that dumb? And now I can't think of anything else than Boris piercing his ear for the emerald earring. Tumblr has fucked it up bad.)

1 hr 43 min in : They nailed the Kitsey Theo confrontation.

1 hr 44 min in : Ayyy Ozma of Oz!

1 hr 48 min in : I noticed it before but I wasn't sure... Now I am. Pippa has Welty's ring. On her finger. At all times. (also, is NYC always that noisy? Must suck to walk on the roads.)

1 hr 52 min 23 sec in : They nailed the Theo Pippa date. What's that song playing in the background? I want the name. It's almost like two hours and I still haven't seen Aneurin Barnard once. Why! (Jerome's mentioned in the movie btw.)

1 hr 52 min 51 sec in : Complained too soon. Boris is sat in the dark doing god knows what. My man Aneurin is here!

1 hr 53 min 37 sec in : BOREO REUNIONNNNNN - no don't look at me like that I only watched it thrice.

1 hr 56 min in : Boris saying "it's someone else" with a knowing look and Theo looking at him. The frickin yearning.

1 hr 57 min in : Boris is like you're unhappy, I'm here, we're both rich, let's f*ck. "We could"... What are you suggesting dude he's repressed!

1 hr 58 min in : "you unwrapped it and showed it to me." So many meanings. The heart, the love the soul... Wow. Good for you, screen play writers! ( It's kinda hilarious how Boris got mad at Theo for never quote unquote fucking opening it.)

2 hr 1 min in : I'm calling it. They're going to fuck up the Theo Hobie confrontation. They put it on the wrong time. And they also fucked up the text from the book.

2 hr 5 min 48 sec in : Even Platt is saving his sister's face. Also where did Todd go? Did he never grow up? I wish Mrs Barbour didn't use Theo like she did.

2 hr 7 min in : The frame where Boris is between Kitsey and Theo. Chef's kiss.

2 hr 10 min 54 sec in : *intense music playing* Boris put his leg up on the table and I burst into laughter THOSE ARE THE FAMOUS FUCK ME PUMPS.

2 hr 11 min in : AAAAA THE FOREHEAD TOUCH AAAAAAA (Theo just knows without looking that Boris is close enough to touch? Theo are you sure you don't feel feelings for him?)

2 hr 12 min in : Theo is so worried that I'm not sure if it's for Boris or for losing the painting again. Omg he just murdered a man. Oh god.

2 hr 14 min in : Theo is spiralling. In the movie they imply that Hobie played a part in him attempting suicide. So wrong. Poor Hobie. In the book that wasn't the case.

2 hr 15 min in : The transition of the Goldfinch into Audrey, wow. Also, is it the first time we're seeing her? The movie started so long ago that I've forgotten if I saw Theo and Audrey in the museum. Boris following right after Audrey? That's a subliminal message. Boris is here to rescue y'all.

2 hr 16 min in : No shit Boris is freaking out right now.

2 hr 17 min in : The diner scene. They're both crying. "Happy Christmas, Potter" - which was of course, I love you.

2 hr 18 min in : No don't you dare compare Audrey and Mrs Barbour. Audrey would never drug her child or use him for her benefit.

2 hr 20 min in : Poor kid bumps into his mom lol. I found it funny.

On the whole

The movie was nice if you'd read the book beforehand. The first hour was steak, The second hour was Korean BBQ and the rest of the twenty minutes were minced beef. If you get what I mean. Weird analogy. It could have been much better. But it was really very nice in some places. Most places I'd say.

I didn't like how the pop songs ruined the mood of certain moments. I didn't like how you couldn't hear the conversation over the music playing. For example in the engagement party when Platt and Theo talked. Or in the diner scene.

Both Borises killed the accent thing. They tried their best. Cut them some slack.

Oakes deserves an Oscar for holding up this movie on his smol shoulders. I was shook at how a kid could act that well.

Popchik deserved more screen time. I'm still pissed they didn't add the Popchik Boris reunion. But then they couldn't make it chronological, what were we supposed to expect anyway.

Ansel Elgort y'all. Theo sure improved his handwriting lol. Ansel's writing is nice. He was actually good in this movie. Better than he was in The Fault In Our Stars. The internet is just mean. The critics too. I will never understand the hate.

All in all, it could have been a better adaptation but it didn't suck as bad as everyone made it out to be. John Clownery should be punished nonetheless. Special shout-out to Roger Deakins for making it work.