#we have (technically) 3 more to go before this lil project is finished

[fiercest-eigengrau-skies]

i love love love the duology of characters

wip under cut!

composed! how she normally looks (technically an illusion)

feral! off the shits! is no longer holding up the illusion

[thetenamongstthesethrees]

TW: REFERENCE TO SH AND RELAPSE OF SH AND SUICIDE ATTEMPT

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Ok so ik ive been inactive for a *WHILE* and im srry for that but like i have a buncha things that happened these past 3 months that I NEED To share SOOOO....

First things first, the one im most excited abt: I DID MY FIRST PERFORMANCE!!! My school was doing little mermaid jr and I got Scuttle! I was really happy to get my first role and getting at least one solo, and Im just happy overall on how it went! I think I did really good on my first try! Only bad thing was that now im kinda going through my lil mermaid hyperfixation and have been looking up fics where Sebastian and Ariel kinda have a Father/Parental Figure-Daughter or Older Brother-Younger (stupid but ultimately well meaning) Sister dynamic and have started to write a fic on that bc no ones done it before apparently😒(im going cray cray, bonkers mayhaps)

Might've gotten my eye infected(I live in the east of the us, new york to be more specific and woke up the day after the "live vintage (BLAME CANADA/j) filter" with my right eyes nerves slightly more irritated and haven't gotten that checked out so thats fun)

FINALLY finished that one drawing ive been making for 3 MONTHS.(well, technically....)

Almost done writing my passion project, AKA the one I originally wanted to make into an animated series but have settled for a book just in case that can't happen! I still need to work out some kinks, design more outfits, get all their personalities in check, make sure the world and magic is fully fleshed out, ect.

I also do band, and while I originally thought that I would have a problem bc of both band and theatres close scheduling(i originally had dress rehearsal on june 2nd, AND my band concert on June 2nd) but it all worked out in the end! My band concert went great, and while the dress rehearsal was a mess, we at least got through it! :)

Unintentionally quit SH! I was originally only meant to stop until AFTER performances, but ive been bettering myself and learned that if I ever want to forgive myself or at least move on I gotta stop feeling sorry for myself and not forget nor forgive, but remember, i just can't let it haunt me. I know I'll relapse, I always do eventually, but I want to enjoy these few moments of mental "clarity" while I can. I've also learned that for some reason i tend to become a more terrible person and despicable person the more time I spend at home with my mother, so that's fun. God, I hate America's education system, its messed me up BAD. AND the foster care system. I just tried to kms 2 times today, and she didn't even notice, or care. How sad is that?

On a lighter note, yes, as the rest of yt and TikTok, I got a minor lil hyperfixation on the Lorax and really think ppl should make more [PLATONIC] Lorax and Onceler dynamics, mainly the type where they're like some really annoying pair of bickering siblings or a father whos sick of his adopted child's shit, like there is so much on the table for platonic fluff and angst and most of what I've seen is romantic smut and fluff like CHANGE IT UP A LIL

Also, Ive been going to karaoke centers on Tuesdays and have become a lot more confident to performing in front of ppl! So far, I've performed "All You Wanna Do", "The Ballad of Jane Doe", "Heart of Stone", and am gonna do "What the World Needs" the next upcoming Tuesday, where I'm gonna try interacting with the audience while singing!!

(Also, before I end this....I may have ADHD??? my teacher who has ADHD says some of my behavior is "similar to hers"(i feel like thats just her way of saying i reek of neurodivergency) and I also did some research and I display similar/exact behaviors listed, have taken online tests from doctorate confirmed sites and basically all of them said to go get a diagnosis. I also found I do a few behaviors similar to stimming! Also also, I kinda suspect a lil more bc my mom has Autism and apparently sometimes neurodivergency is biological (i forgor the word) but my mom is kinda in denial abt my Depression diagnosis and thinks I got anxiety "biologically", so if I tell her I wanna get tested for ADHD shes just kinda gonna gaslight me into not believing that and i already told the school therapist and basically she just told me that I'm probably just imagining things or copying behaviors from my mother and that "kids like to give themselves all these titles nowadays" so I just did what I always do which is to keep it shut and act until they think you fell in line)

So yeah, thats all! Thanks for reading, now that my schedule is clear again ima start posting more frequently again, so be aware :) <3333

[hummingbird-games]

Dev Daries

Feb 3, 2023

IT’S (me again announcing) BLACK HISTORY MONTH AYYYYYYEEEE!!!!!!! 

Okay, some updates of the Crushed variety???

[image ID: a screenshot of the Itch.io page for the visual novel Crushed. end ID]

There are a few things I’d like to tweak before making the page public this weekend, one of them involving 1-2 more/different screenshots. Maaaaaybe some cute little graphics made via Canva?? But I’m starting to get an idea of the visual theme for this project. And it’s happening a lot faster than it did for HSD 😂

[image ID: a screenshot of a cell phone with an ongoing text conversation. end ID]

If this conversation looks familiar, that’s on purpose. I just want to bring your attention to what I’ve accomplished since last time LOL! All that’s left now is to replace the white bubbles with a different color, which is annoyingly not simple??? I also keep putting it off because that requires making A Decision. And I’m decision-ed out 💩 

As y’all are aware, this is for the Black VN game jam. The original plan was to have a small enough project that could be done by or before Feb. 28, but this thing kind of ballooned and I’ve scaled back to “release 6-7k word demo with completed art and graphic assets, music, and text”. 

As of the time of this post, the full 20k something words are coded. I can technically play through the whole thing including the three endings and it’s quite a thrill. I cannot wait until y’all get the same opportunity!!! (Ending 2 still makes me sob like a baby, wheeeeeeeee!)

The plan is to have the game out Summer 2023, but that is dependent on 1) how fast the art is finished (because ya girl is thinking unlockable CGs, but also there’s the sprite art which ahaha is the highest priority...ugh) and 2) how I’m doing health wise. But I will keep y’all posted, and of course I’ve got fun things to share as we wait for the full game to release!

CGs might be up in the air but...voice acting is a thing that’s happening??

Just tonight I had my first live direct with a voice actor y’all and now I see why so many game devs become addicted to incorporating it?!?!? (It’s partial VA so don’t get too excited but get a lil excited because the finished product is gonna sound so cool.)

At this point you’ve maybe seen the character reveals?? Or you’ve seen me Crying On Main and missed the self-reblogs 😭 y’all, I did not want to do a m!MC game!!!! I even went as far as making a post saying I wouldn’t make a BL game (note to y’all, back up ya shit AND never say never). But one of my unwritten mottos for this studio is to tell stories. Tell the stories that won’t let me know peace until they’re out.

And Crushed wouldn’t have worked with an f!MC. And I quickly found out it this story wouldn’t work unless it was bi Black boy. 

the biphobia out here is something I’m going to fight until I’m 6ft under

Black boys and their stories are not a monolith, and I’m sick of teen media being written for adult consumption while disrespecting the teen demographic

one Black teen is going to play this game and it’s my hope, my desire, that they will feel less hollow inside when they finish...

So anyhoo. That’s your update.

If you’re looking for my “special brand” of game reactions and uncensored thoughts, I promise I will make the side blog public sometime 😭 I’ve been switching energy to books and I’m still trying to prove an author I adore wrong! When I asked her how does she balance gaming and reading, she looked into the camera and told me ‘you don’t’ and I hate that years later she’s still right...

And that’s that! I’m off now 🤪

- Gemini

P.S. I still plan on doing the bad endings for An Everyday Love and making it everyone’s problem, and that’s like half the reason I’m dragging my feet, so forgive me 

[storiesofsvu]

10, 15, 20, 4 & 9 (randomly chosen) for the writer asks!

10. top three fave fic tropes?

not sure if they're "tropes" per-say, but I enjoy writing the following:

-secret relationship

-the "we fucked on a one night stand and it turns out you're the new kid at work the next morning" trope

and

-the "we've been dating and head over heels in love/fwb/whatever and it turns out you're related to/work for/used to date my ex/parent/sibling/boss"

15. what's your favorite plotless fic you have written?

hmmm.... You Can & You Will w/Rita. or Christmas Bonus with Calex x reader

20. do you work on a single project or many at the same time? how does that work for you?

oof. okay. so in the past, I have worked on 2-3 series at the same time, and done my best to rotate writing/posting. like, I had a time where Cabot/Barba/Rita were on rotate with their series. i also used to write a fic/chapter, an immediately post it, like, there was no queuing, I had no "wips" per-say.

NOW...I've decided to change things up. I'll start something, and if I feel like I don't want to finish it, I'll leave it be in word and start something else. Or like, if i'm writing something that's going to be smut, but i don't feel like writing the smut right away, I'll pause and move onto something else. I've also gone through and outlined the current fics I have been writing/posting (nanny and peach) so i know where they're going and I'm trying to have more stuff written before posting, so i actually have wips in word, and more ability to edit/alter as i haven't posted it yet.

i like to have a variety at all times, it helps swapping genres, or straight passing vs wlw relationships, or even ships vs reader inserts. and fandoms. like, jumping around helps me stay focused and stimulated (i will tell ya right now. i'm pretty fucking rita'd out....i could barely even get through a couple of her eps i tried watching the other day...like...not that i'm over her, i just need a lil break)...

4. Do you have any OC's? do you have a story for them?

okay, so earlier on, no. or at least, not really. like, occasionally a sister or parent shows up that we haven't met in canon, so we technically do have Cynthia Calhoun: Rita's toxic af mother.

Natasha will be an upcoming OC, but ya'll have met her in the version of yn in Classified Affairs/Bruised Peach, so you know that backstory already. and more of it will be coming out later, though the story she's in won't focus on her.

9.Thoughts on cliffhangers?

oh i fucking love them. let it be dramatic. i love leaving a bit of mystery in shit. like, i LOVED SSS with y'all trying to piece together who the wife was, and CA trying to figure out the foreshadowing and how things were going to end up with Heather. i love shit like that. and i do my best to not have a cliffhanger and not have the next ch started so it isnt too long between updates.

thanks for playing!!

Yet Another Writing ask.

[stjernfaerie]

I finally watched all of MCU

in release order because IT MAKES SENSE!!!!

special thanks to @littlegingrnut who watched ALL OF THEM with me. She’s the best. 

Idk if anyone cares at all, but I feel like sharing, so here’s some thoughts and reactions, enjoy: 

Phase 1: 

Iron man

okay but like how was Tony such a jerk in the beginning only to become like the most lovable character ever??

YINSEN DID NOT NEED TO DIE :((

did not like the antagonist what was that

I mean he’s not bad I just didn’t like him that much

I wanna get myself a jarvis tho 

all in all, really enjoyed it

got me really excited to watch more

The Incredible Hulk

didn't watch cuz aly said not necessary

we just skimmed over the important parts 

oh and watched the end credits scene

Iron man 2

this was really great

okay but like I love Ivan Vanko hes such a great antagonist

I LOVE TONY

HE’S SO GREAT

THE CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT AND EVERYTHING GOSH AAH

oh damn ~Natasha Romanoff~

ma’am-

Pepper as a powerful business lady? YES  

just... really great shit right here

Thor

Mmmmmm I don't see the hype about Loki??

his two faced-ness is annoying me

also Thor? I didn't love him at first,, he's a bit cliché

STELLAN SKARSGÅRD YES SWEDISH REP

okay but Thor is a good boi actually,,, I take it back he’s pretty great

Oh nooo Loki - yeah lol as if he actually died 

YO WHAT WAS UP WITH THAT END CREDITS SCENE that got me all like WTF and shit

also told ya Loki didn’t die

Captain America: The First Avenger

okay full disclosure, I actually watched this one time before bc I started watching them in chronological order but never got any further than this

it made so much more sense this time

I liked it so much better this time 

because THE RELEASE ORDER MAKES SO MUCH SENSE 

anyway

this was good !!

I'm gay for Peggy omg

and Steve is such a good boi

DID BUCKY REALLY HAVE TO DIE

all in all not my favourite tho, not too memorable tbh

"I had a date" 😭

The Avengers

ohhh man

ALL OF THEM TOGETHER? UGH YES

Oh hello Dr. Banner nice to see u

Loki bro pls chill

OKAY HULK HELLO

NATASHANATASHANATASHA AAAHH I'M GAY

still don't get the Loki hype tbh. maybe a lil bit but idk

THOR OKAY I LOVE THOR NOW

TONY WHAT THE FUCK NO NO NO TONY DON'T

oh okay he's good

I love them all so much oh gosh

I MADE IT THROUGH PHASE ONE WOHOOOO

***

Phase 2

Iron man 3

this movie changed me

aly can confirm - I was very much not okay after seeing this

literally had anxiety through all of it

I mean I LOVED it

but like

the ptsd :(((

although I do love that they showed that, just made me love Tony even more

just... showing the ugly parts - love that shit

but also like noooo tony bby :(((( 

HARLEY!!!! IS SO GREAT !!! AND ALY SAID HE COMES BACK AT ONE POINT!! YAY

just.... Tony Stark man.

great antagonist, love the whole mandarin thing

EXTREMIS? NO THANK U that honestly gives me like zombie ish vibes or smth I don’t like it

but like it was great 

OH PEPPER JUST BECAME 10x HOTTER DAMN SHE JUST GETS MORE AND MORE ATTRACTIVE EACH MOVIE HUH

PEPPER ALMOST DYING? NOPE

THE PAIN IN TONY'S FACE? NOPE

all in all loved this so much and I am still not really okay

Thor: The Dark World

I see why people think this is the worst Thor movie.

DON’T GET ME WRONG IT WAS GREAT

but like,,, meh? the big end fight was so anti-climactic? not epic at all like what the fuck

I LOVE DARCY

but she's clearly gay so stop makin her fool around with the intern

but like Thor is such a soft boi and I love him

again, Loki's two-faced-ness – aRH

but,,,, I get the Loki hype now

I'm aboard the train

I love Loki 

oh oh oh the part in his prison cell when Thor comes to talk to him and is all like "enough tricks" and then his cell is all torn up and he's all torn up and AH BABY 😭

Thor just needs cuddles 

Aaaaand this is where I accidentally got the worst possible spoiler. :)))

I wanted to watch some wholesome Tony Stark content before bed and so I searched youtube for "Iron Man" and clicked on a video I thought looked nice and wholesome. I accidentally read the top comment and then proceeded to break down and freak out to Aly and Hanna on Aly’s live, and they comforted me and stuff <3 

Aly then told me that “hey remember that I told you that the little boy in Iron Man 3 comes back at one point? Yeah that’s at the funeral” 

STUPIDLY, I then watched the death scene on YouTube, went to bed crying, and of course, dreaming about it. I will never be okay again and I will never be ready for Endgame thank you and goodbye.

anywAY,,,,,

Captain America: Winter Soldier

*SO MUCH SCREAMING*

I thought that Bucky didn’t deserve to die - and he didn’t - but like,,, DYING WOULD HAVE BEEN BETTER THAN THIS 

the ~bromance~

nat and steve I mean, so good

I AM NOT OKAY I WAS NOT PREPARED FOR THIS MOVIE BUT IT WAS AMAZING

Natasha tho mmmmmhhf

I was rly confused while watching but like everything came together at the end and it was so nice and damn this is one of my favorites so far

Sam is great I want more of Sam

Guardians of the Galaxy

multiple people had told me that they thought I’d really like this movie

honestly? I didn’t

it was kinda meh?

like I found it very predictable and cliché and not in a delightful way

idk if it’s just that I know that Chris Pratt is a dick but I don’t like Peter

I rly like Gamora and Nebula, but like I’m a lesbian, so I don’t think anyone’s surprised that I like the traumatized warrior gals

but like in general I’m kinda disappointed

I only gasped like twice, and it was barely gasp-worthy moments

Avengers: Age of Ultron

All of them together just makes me so happy, they’re so cute with each other AH

loved Ultron as the antagonist. that was great.

but,,,, I was a bit disappointed that we didn’t really get to see any regret from Tony bc he created Ultron

THE TWINS ARE FANTASTIC

whatever’s going on with Bruce and Nat, I don’t like it

TOO MANY moments that reminded me of the spoiler that I refuse to speak. Did not enjoy

everyone just needs to be hugged why doesn’t anybody HUG THEM????

not happy about Jarvis dying :((( even tho he technically didn’t die but like HE’S NOT JARVIS ANYMORE IS HE

and then Tony just replaces him with this Friday just like that??? no i’m not okay with that

in a ranking scenario this one falls in like the top of the middle range? Like it’s not one of the favorites, but it’s still up there. 

I FUCKING DID IT AGAIN ARGH

I was just reading about new MCU projects that are coming up and THERE WAS A SPOILER WARNING, but STUPID AS I AM I DISREGARDED that and kept on reading. I was just skimming through the text and I read “Loki who dies” and stopped right there, because AAHH FUCKING SHIT

I was on a call with Aly as this happened and so I told her that I had given myself a spoiler again and that it was about Loki, and she was all like I can’t remember anything that happens to Loki hmm, and so I thought YAY it’s okay, they just meant one of the times when he fake died!!! so I went on to keep reading, but before I could read anything else Aly stopped me, remembering. She told me it would be gut-wrenching and terrible and I’m just- 

So disappointed in myself. 

Ant-Man

it was an enjoyable movie, but like,,, a little meh? 

I feel kinda the same as I did with GOTG

but I like each of them better than the other for different reasons? idk???

the plot wasn’t very thick, like I could have gone away to pee without pausing and probably not miss too much

I didn’t really get invested in the story or the characters

but it was enjoyable for sure

Sam!!! Hello!!!! 

Again, like with GOTG, I found it kinda cliché, but in a more delightful way this time

WE MADE IT THROUGH PHASE 2 AND PASSED THE HALF-WAY POINT WOHOOOOO

***

Phase 3

Captain America: Civil War

I constantly needed to be hugged while watching this

in the end I was fine, like I’ve been way less okay after some of the other movies, but during? needed hugs and cuddles

I love that they were fighting each other it was just... umff you know

but also like,,, LOVE EACH OTHER 

Wanda and Vision? no thanks I HATE IT

Steve and Sharon?? NO THANKS I HATE IT

literally that’s just weird on SO many levels

and that kiss was-- ugh I hated it. 

SPIDER BOY !!!!! UGH I LOVE HIM ALREADY

Black Panther heLLOOO

ALL THE STUCKY THOOO

Tony and Steve fighting in the end got me :( 

Doctor Strange

This one falls at the bottom of my list

It was the shortest movie but it felt SO LONG because I was so bored through all of it

it just never got me hooked, I didn’t get invested in the story at all. 

there weren’t even any characters that I liked enough to want to see more

sure another infinity stone and getting to know doctor strange and shit, I get why you kinda need to watch it

but I doubt I’ll watch it again

Guardians of the Galaxy 2

just like with the first one, kinda meh

I didn’t really get into it until the last half hour or so

the music really carried this movie tho

and baby groot !!!

I love Nebula so much, such a great character

Yondu dying was really great, it did a lot for his character

I still don’t really like Peter Quill

I feel like it was barely contributing to the infinity saga, the only thing that’s somewhat connected is that Nebula wants to kill Thanos, and the only reason I know that’s connected is because of spoilers

because I’m not really supposed to know the significance of Thanos at this point

but then again, maybe I’ll feel differently when I’ve finished all the movies

Spiderman: Homecoming

SPIDEY BOY !!!!!!!!! 

THIS IS A FAVORITE

I CANNOT EVEN BEGIN TO EXPRESS HOW MUCH I LOVED THIS MOVIE

THE TONY/PETER INTERACTIONS WERE SO GREAT

PETER IS A BABY AND HE’S SO GREAT AND AAAAAHH

HE’S ON MY LIST BTW

AND LIKE,,, CAN WE TALK ABOUT HIS FIGHTING SOUNDS COMPARED TO EVERYONE ELSE’S???? Like steve and thor and shit are all like huOH heeeUH oAH ya know?? and then peter’s over here like eeh heh mmmMHF 

HE’S JUST REALLY GREAT AND AAH I LOVED THIS MOVIE SO MUCH

LITERALLY SMILED THROUGH ALMOST ALL OF IT

except when things were going bad and during the fight scenes and shit and when he was in big danger and stuffs

BUT LIKE AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH

SO GOOD

OH OH OH AND STEVE’S LITTLE EDUCATIONAL VIDEOS WERE SO CUTE AH

hehehheheh and the end credits tho heheheheh

ANYWAY I LOVED THIS MOVIE SO SO SO SOO MUCH

Thor: Ragnarok

ANOTHER FAVORITE AAAAH

ALL THE BROTHERLY MOMENTS THO

Kinda mad that we didn’t get a hug there in the end but oh well

Thor is so sassy and goofy in this one I love it

ugghhhhh I love Loki so much

Hela has so much Maleficent vibes

Heimdall yESSS !!!

all the Thor/Hulk interactions were so PRECIOUS AAH

this was just such a great movie with great character development for both Thor and Loki and ughhhh IT WAS SO GOOD

“get help” was fucking ICONIC

VALKYRIE THO

oof not excited for infinity war :(( 

Black Panther

this one falls somewhere in the middle for me

like it was good, but it’s not up there

my main issue with it is that it didn’t really feel so much like a superhero movie, it was more just like... family drama

but Shuri tho, love her

and all the awesome ladies fighting!!! yes!!!!

BUCKY!!! 

Avengers: Infinity War

I am not okay

I will never be okay again

I thought Loki dying was gonna be the worst part - and honestly, knowing about it beforehand made it less painful actually

but NO NO NO 

THE LAST 15 MINUTES IS JUST A CRYFEST HUH 

REAL NICE THANK YOU

oh gosh I can’t even think 

I told y’all I didn’t like Peter Quill and well, HE DESERVED WHAT HE GOT 

oh gosh nope 

I’ve been feeling guilty that all of y’all had to wait a full year for endgame but AT LEAST THEN YOU HAD TIME TO BE OKAY AGAIN BEFORE ENDGAME

fucking shit what have I gotten myself into

Ant-Man and the Wasp

I liked this one better than the first ant-man

It’s still not up there but it was good

idk it could just be bc I know the characters more this time or because I kind of had pretty low expectations but I liked this more

oh also maybe I was just happy that I didn’t have to see like all my favorite characters die like I did yesterday :((( 

still not okay

anyway, ant-man and the wasp

I really liked Ava, really great character honestly

I liked Hope a whole lot more this time around

still don’t really like her and Scott together, especially after her mother like talked through him and shit. I feel like if I was Hope and my mother talked to me through my love interest, I would feel pretty weird about it all

but maybe that’s just me idk

oh but what I do like about scott and hope is all of hank’s comments about them

he’s funny hehehe

also Luis! great dude

okay but Bill FOSTER???? as in JANE FOSTER?? SEEMINGLY HAVING NO CONNECTION AT ALL??? 

there’s too many double names in this whole ass franchise and I’m upset

two Peters, two Eriks, two Fosters.... like I know that’s what real life is like, people have the same names, but THIS IS FICTION

YOU CAN AVOID THE CONFUSION

that wasn’t totally related to this movie specifically but this was the third strike dudes, I couldn’t just ignore it anymore.

oh oh oh and I did not appreciate the mid credits scene, I DON’T NEED REMINDERS OF THAT PAIN THANK YOU VERY MUCH

Captain Marvel

this one falls somewhere in the middle for me

like it was good, and I enjoyed it a lot, but it just wasn’t really anything that left me all like woooaaaah omg AH you know???

I really liked how it connected back to previous movies like with Ronan and the Kree people from GOTG and the tesseract and all that jazz

where can I get myself a flerken tho I want one

I appreciate that no one turned into dust, that was nice

my main problem with this movie is that HER POWERS MAKE NO SENSE 

like in the beginning it was kinda okay. I didn’t understand her powers, but at least they felt reasonable

then we got to the end and all of a sudden she’s flying and glowing and strong enough to stop and redirect a fuckin missile, and then she’s FLYING INTO BOMBS AND COMING OUT THE OTHER END COMPLETELY UNSCATHED?? 

OH AND THEN SHE FLIES INTO FUCKIN SPACE WITHOUT A HELMET OR ANYTHING AND SHE CAN BREATHE JUST FINE???

it just makes no sense, it’s completely unreasonable and it makes her too perfect to me. Too unbeatable. I don’t like it. 

but all in all a good movie, loved seeing young Fury and shit

Avengers: Endgame I WILL NEVER BE READY

As I thought, I wasn’t ready

But, I actually think that knowing about Tony beforehand made it a bit easier

I still wish I hadn’t known

and I still bawled like a baby 

but like,,, I think I would have been way worse off if I hadn’t known

I’m just so sad now

I really need a hug

and even though I just cried more than I’ve done all year I need to cry some more I think

I’m glad everyone who got dusted came back, although I kinda knew they would 

well, I would have been fine with Quill staying dusted tbh. I really don’t like that guy

NATASHA WAS NOT ALLOWED TO DIE, I WILL NOT BE OKAY WITH THIS :(

oh gosh yeah I know I have more thoughts about this movie that I wanna say but I need to be more okay first oh man

okay hi again, it’s the next day and I’m still sad but here are some more thoughts: 

I hated the whole Bruce/Hulk think. All the good parts about each side of his character were just erased.

I don’t even see the purpose of it. 

Okay I kinda knew that Steve was gonna go back to the 40s, but I WASN’T SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT SO SHH

anyway, I didn’t like Steve staying in the 40s, and here’s why: 

he knew that this was the single one out of 14 million times they won against Thanos, so he knew that changing anything at all would fuck it up

but at the same time, I find it hard to believe that Steve could be aware that Tony and Nat dies and not want to do anything about it

even though he knows he can’t

so wouldn’t it have been easier to just go back to the present after he returned all the stones? So he wouldn’t have to live with that dilemma?

ALSO, I WILL NOT ACCEPT that after everything he did to get Bucky back, he just leaves him. Just like that. 

Literally the only reason this makes sense is as a setup for the Falcon and The Winter Soldier Disney+ series. 

But I still don’t like it

Spiderman: Far From Home

This was nice, I needed this. 

I didn’t like it as much as homecoming, but I didn’t expect to considering how much I loved hoco

it was really nice to see some more Peter Parker bc i love him but also like,,, most of it was traumatized spidey boy :((( and that was sad :(

He’s literally just a child and he’s already so damaged and it’s big big sad

the high school vibes were immaculate

not that I’ve actually been to high school in the US but like,,, it felt like a high school movie okok

Okay but like May’s character really did a full 180? I don’t really understand where that all came from, but uhhhh okay then

Okay, Quentin Beck. 

before we realized he was bad, I already didn’t like him, cuz it seemed like he was gonna start to become a new father figure for Peter and I WAS NOT COOL WITH THAT

but then I understood that that wasn’t happening so it’s all good

he’s a pretty cool antagonist. not a fave, but pretty cool. 

OH OH FLASH IS SO GAY FOR SPIDERMAN THO RIGHT

he actually got some real nice character development that I had not expected, that was nice

all in all, great movie, I love my spidey boy. 

pretty sad that I’m done tho... :( 

but also like, I watched all of them (except incredible hulk) in 34 days. That’s kinda impressive, right?

ALSO THERE’S NO MORE SPOILER DANGER YAY !!!

and finally, here is my ranking of the movies based on how much I liked them: 

0. The Incredible Hulk ( didn’t watch )

SPIDERMAN: HOMECOMING 

Thor: Ragnarok

Captain America: Winter Soldier

Avengers: Age of Ultron

Iron Man 3

Avengers

Captain America: Civil War

Spiderman: Far From Home

Iron Man 

Avengers: Infinity War

Thor

Avengers: Endgame

Iron Man 2

Thor: The Dark World

Captain Marvel

Black Panther

Captain America: The First Avenger

Ant-Man and the Wasp

Guardians of the Galaxy 2

Ant-Man

Guardians of the Galaxy

Doctor Strange

[ithinkwehitametaphor]

Challenge: List the WIPs you promised you'd update, and why you haven't yet

Thanks for the tag @cheesybadgers and @acourtofsnakes❤❤❤

There are only three real WIPs I have atm. I'm not counting the stuff that's exclusively going on in my head. :D

1. Past/Present/Future (Kaden Russell x female reader)

I am 1300 words into chapter 7! :D But it's going slow. Mostly I don't have time due to work and when I do have it, I'm trying to relax so the cycle can start all over again come Monday... I am generally a slow writer and I can only really write when I am in the mood, there is time and it's also best if I am alone. In other words, if you stress me irl I cannot write. T___T

2. The Sandwich Chronicles (unmarried Steve Murphy x female reader)

This is really more of an episodic thing now as the main plot (get together) is done. So I'd say it's half a WIP? I still have an idea for one more chapter. An outline exists and there are about 300 words written so far. I need to finish Past/Present/Future first before I can go on with this. Tbh that fic is most important to me atm and I fear I will lose drive if I do other projects first.

3. High Maintenence (Javier Peña x Steve Murphy, Narcos)

Technically, still a WIP. We left our two favorite DEA idiots after they finally confessed their feelings for each other in chapter 9. There is, however, a chapter 10 (1200 words already written) in my WIP folder. After I felt like the main issue (when will they admit to their feelings) was resolved I worked on WIPS 1 and 2 of this list to get a lil break. Heh. And now I first have to finish Pas/Present/Future first. :D Sorry.

To conclude this self-reflexive piece, here is a hopefully realistic plan for writing on my WIPs is this:

1. Completely finish P/P/F. 2. Finish chapter 10 of High Maintenance and leave it as potentially the last chapter with an option to one day come back to it and explore some more tropes. The fic can be read as a concluded story but will leave a few things open on purpose. :3 3. Write that last installment of The Sandwich Chronicles. I will then probably leave it a that then. But as this is episodic now it at least leaves an opportunity to come back to it whenever I want to without having readers suspended in forever unfinished fic limbo. :)

No pressure tagging: @yespolkadotkitty @holbrook-boyd @songsformonkeys @autumnleaves1991-blog @absurdthirst @claveldelaire and whoever wants to do this

[purplesurveys]

863

Do you have any friends who are on and off with bfs/gfs all the time? Yeah, Jo and Aya don’t make the most stable couple. They had one really problematic stint last year where they would break up and get back together every week. They ironed it out eventually and they’ve been ok for a while, but lately I think it’s a little rocky again because I no longer see them interacting and they’ve been retweeting stuff that gives me a few hints. I wouldn’t be surprised if they’ve broken it off for good. When was the last time you almost cried out of exhaustion? Ohhhh boy. It was some day in Feb I think? and everything had just been going wrong for me. Andrew and I got yelled at by our thesis adviser because she didn’t like what we submitted and she gave us a day to revise three entire chapters. We stayed in the college working away from 3 PM to 10 PM then when I got home, I realized I forgot to bring with me a certain item that my org entrusted me with. Absolutely wasn’t allowed to lose it. Had a panic attack and this was when I started crying because it was so late and I just wanted to go to bed; though Andrew saved my ass by offering to go back to school at like 11:30 just to retrieve the damn thing. Lastly, that was a time when business reporting was still giving me hell and I was struggling to find a business story around campus to turn in for that week, so I was freaking out about that too. All in all a shit day. What`s a TV show you hate missing? Idk man, if I miss a show I don’t think there’d be hate attached to it. I imagine I’d miss a show because it made me happy, so this doesn’t make a lot of sense to me. Do you think it’s funny how people always say their pet is the best ever? It’s adorable haha but not necessarily funny. Whenever someone says it I totally believe them; I think all pets are the best :) When did you last brush your teeth? This morning.

What was the last website (besides this one) that you visited? I checked my Twitter right before this question. Do you have a friend who you think you’ll be best friends with forever? Yes, Angela is for keeps. Does it annoy you when you accidentally delete things? For the most part I can just undo and get the deleted thing back, but when that’s not applicable it can get super distressing. I know I was gloomy for a very long time when I accidentally wiped out my camera roll with photos from 2014-2016. What`s a movie / book / TV show / band / whatever you highly recommend? Movie: Ferris Bueller’s Day Off Book: Got nothing in this department. Show: BoJack Horseman Band: Paramore ha. They got a sound for almost everyone! When did you last use a dictionary / thesaurus? Two questions ago when I was looking for an adjective to best describe what it’s like to lose your entire camera roll and, essentially, good memories that you’ve made. Are you anticipating or dreading anything? I ammmmmm anticipating dinner haha. I can’t think of anything I’m dreading.

If someone could randomly give you something right now what would you like? Baked sushi :( It’s a recent trend locally and it looks so gooddddd, I just don’t wanna spend the last of my savings on it or ask my parents to buy a tray for me. What`s the most annoying thing in the world? At the moment it’s people who refuse to wear masks because they claim that it messes with their oxygen level or because they find it personally uncomfortable. When did you last use one of those water slides you put on hills? I have no clue what you mean. What are you sitting on right now? One of the dining room chairs. What skills would you like to learn / develop? Adobe Indesign and iMovie. I dabbled with these recently – Indesign for a class and iMovie to make a video for Gabie – and though I was always too scared to start using programs like these, I actually found them fun and super useful when I finally had my hands on them. When we saw each other the other day Gab was talking about using this break to take up workshops in different Adobe programs so that she’ll have more stuff to put on her resumé, so I might follow her footsteps too. What is something other people say you’re good at but you think you’re not? Teaching. I always feel like I fumble a lot, but idk I get compliments on it so I guess I’m kinda okay but I just don’t see it. What does your bedside lamp look like? I don’t have one. I used to have a wall light though. It was a just tiny lil bulb that I had to plug in to give my room a light orange hue. What did you last take a photograph of? Myself and Cooper. When was the last time you got really frustrated with technology? Yesterday. My laptop was a bit slow when I wanted my YouTube video to go full-screen, and my impatient ass already got irritated with it. What was the last funny thing someone said to you? She didn’t technically ‘say’ it but my mom was singing a song earlier and had the lyrics wrong, and what came out of her mouth instead was so wrong and so funny.  Who taught you to tie your shoelaces? My grandmother. What was the last thing you bought? I bought snacks from my girlfriend’s dad Korean food business! I got myself odeng (fishcakes) and tteokbokki (spicy rice cake) :) Do you want to move to somewhere else? If so, where? Any country with a capable government at this point. What time is it where you are? 8:04 PM. What’s your favourite picture of yourself as a child? I’m not sharing that on here, but I do have my favorites.

Do you like your neighbours? I suppose they’re okay, in a sense that they haven’t done anything to annoy me. I’ve never talked to them in the last 12 years that I’ve lived here though haha I always felt like my mom could take care of the socializing stuff – and she has been. Does your room need to be cleaned? Nah I’m barely in it these days. It’s mostly spotless and things are stacked up neatly. Do you have a good relationship with your family? I wouldn’t say it’s good, but it’s not bad. Super lacking in the emotional aspect, though, and it’s a big reason why at the end of the day I can’t call it a good relationship. What is something people are surprised to hear about you? That I don’t like fruits. The horrified gasps and expressions never get old. Do you make judgments about people straight after meeting them? Only if they blatantly act like a jerk. Do you hate any particular groups of people? I mean I hate racists, abusers, rapists, Karens... but if you mean to ask if I hate any race or people of a certain sexual/gender orientation then most definitely not. Do you fall up or down stairs usually? Down :( Do you constantly break things? (By mistake or otherwise) HAHA yes. What was the last bug you saw? Kinda looked like a moth but I’m not sure what it was exactly. Are there any smells which make you feel nauseous? Rotten egg, any fruits lol. What is the scariest thing you`ve ever gone through? Random men play-lunging at me when I’m walking outside and then laughing once I jump or whimper. I don’t know if there’s a certain script that those fucking pigs follow, but I’ve had several of the exact same experiences through the years. That’s why my friends can always poke fun at the fact that I drive everywhere no matter how close my destination is – at least I feel safest that way. Do you have anything unusual in your bag? No. I only carried the essentials in the last bag I used when I went out the other day. Are there any people you know in real life that you only talk to online? Yeah, there’s a bunch of people I don’t really get to see irl. Some of them are friends who’ve migrated, some are my friends’ parents, my relatives who’ve always lived in the US, etc. Do you think people who don`t care about education are dumb? In the Philippines they will definitely be considered careless, dumb, and having no ambition. But I know education isn’t as big of a priority in other countries and that college isn’t a necessity in those places, so I guess there’s a cultural difference here. What`s your favourite key on a keyboard? I don’t pick favorite keyboard buttons lol. Do you always finish what you start? Nah I’m a little terrible at that, especially if we’re talking of passion projects. I collected Starbucks planners for like six years and was never able to completely fill up any one of them. Who`s your favourite character from The Simpsons? Or do you hate that show? I’m not a big fan of the show but just because I relate to her a lot and the fact that she’s intelligent and a goody-two-shoes, Lisa. Have you ever had any friends who always tried to steal your things? Nah wtf? I’d so easily stop talking to them if all they did was steal from me lmao What is something you will never understand? People!!! Who!!! Aren’t!!! Nice!!! To!!! Servers/Baristas/Anyone working in a job that has to directly deal with customers!!! When did you last laugh hysterically? Probably earlier this afternoon watching a Good Mythical Morning episode.

[thedragonagelesbian]

10 Accomplishments from 2018

someone i follow did this and it made me really happy reading about someone else’s personal growth, so i decided to reflect on my own-- turns out a lot more happened this year than i remembered!

1. started publishing fanfiction again

starting small but this was a huge accomplishment since I basically stopped sharing my writing with ANYONE when i started high school.

2. FINISHED a piece of fanfiction

again, small, but I had only finished a couple of long-form writing projects before A Game of Wicked Grace, and all of those were written with other people. It felt SO nice to finish something of that scale, all on my own-- and I’m really close to finishing part one of Golden Girl, Black Sheep!

3. became a published academic author

this might be the most surprising of the things I got done this year? I sort of fell into being the secondary author for a paper on choice in narrative games during my summer program; I definitely didn’t expect that I’d leave that program with my name on a paper

4. made a game

okay so technically ive made games before but this one was longer and cooler and also just like... way better. it’s called In Between and its about gender expression in lesbian and bi women!

5. found out what i maybe want to do with my life

related to the above; i made In Between as the final project for a class called queerness and games and it was my favorite class i’ve taken ever. i loved (most) of the theories and the games we played and just looking at video games and its potentials as an art form beyond what is narrowly dictated by AAA games and i think thats just like... What I Want To Do. make those kinds of games and write about them and create playable experiences that resonate as deeply with other people as something like ‘queers in love at the end of the world’ did for me

6. taught a class

it only had four people in it but they all enjoyed it a lot and seemed really happy with the experience & me as their semi-professor

7. played a piece I’ve wanted to play since high school

I can’t overstate how much i love Bruch’s Romance for the viola; ever since i played the orchestra part for it in high school, it’s seemed like the pinnacle of like.... expressive skill on the instrument. and i got to play it and perform it in the spring!!!!

8. made a new best friend

maybe not the biggest thing but you’re talking to someone who still has a lot of growing to do when it comes to social interactions/interpersonal stuff, and i have so much love for this person and theyve been such a positive influence on my life this semester and its been such a pleasure to watch them grow

9. started dating again

ahhhhhHHHHHH TAKE THAT VOICE IN MY HEAD THAT SAYS IM UNLOVABLE THIS PERSON IS REALLY CUTE AND FEMME AND SHE LIKES ME A LOT

9.a. KISSED someone

HELL FUCKING Y E A H

10. started going by cass

i was talking to the aforementioned new best friend about their own feelings around gender/possibly changing their name, and i talked about how i started going by cass, how i came out, how i chose the name, etc. and i guess then i knew i had been going by that name for almost a year but i didnt Know it..... like somehow it feels like ive been ‘cass’ for so much longer than that? maybe bc it feels so right???

.....so anyway

im tagging @sulahns, @transimar, @sconekid, @theangrytori, @bioethicists, @needsmoreexplosions, and anyone who wants an excuse to brag a lil bit about themselves

[auideas]

Ask the Admins 12.0

Anon asked: Jynn, how much are your commissions? How much money do you need left?

Jynn: My prices are super flexible just bc I’m super desperate right now. The deadline for my getting a car was moved back slightly but I’ve only received about $50 in donations since the post was made. The situation I’m in right now is that I’m allowed to use my parents car to get to work… as long as I’m staying at their house while I’m using it. You can find more info on pricing on the services page of my original content blog: @jynnisloriginal

Anon asked: Is your NSFW blog ever going to come back :^( ?

Chamomile: Maybe? I have ideas for it, but I’m not comfortable with running the blog. It would take a lot of work to get in touch with the old admins, get new admins, clean up the blog, get tags set up, have enough posts in the queue to start it up…maybe we’ll make it a summer project when we have the time.

M: Welllllll, I was never really an admin on it in the first place (mainly did coding & general management), but if there’s an interest for it to return, we could open up applications for new admins

@genosha-meiuqer asked: Which Never Book quote do you think most represents who you are?

Chamomile: “Tea should always be enjoyed in the presence of good company.”

M: “He’s like faraway thunder: a soothing rumble in the distance that promises fiery destruction.”

Syren: “Believing is my flying.”

Jynn: “I am but a humble witch who loves cereal.”

Anon asked: If your car could talk, what do you think it would tell you?

Chamomile: “I was once owned by the US Government but now I shuttle a tired college student who swears way too much at other drivers.”

M: halp.

Syren: CHANGE MY GOSH DARN OIL

Jynn: “Kill me.”

Anon asked: Imagine the pain someone in a poly relationship would be in if all of their lovers suddenly didn’t love them anymore. Any prompts for that?

Chamomile: or…..consider this. Everybody is in love and it’s all okay. It was a really bad dream and Character A is able to turn over in bed and snuggle into Character B’s back while Character C absently murmurs words of “it’s okay…you’re okay…” to Character A.  

Anon asked: omg how do you come up with such amazing aus??????/

Chamomile: I have anxiety and I use AU sh*tposting as a coping method

M: I made a deal with several witches of a bloodcult. Long story.

Syren: I can see into other universes, so I just take real stories I see happening and write them down. Duh.

Jynn: Inspiration from real life!

Anon asked: Did Vox go poof?

Chamomile: Yeah, unfortunately.

Anon asked: What do you think when people say asexual is the same thing as aromantic?

Chamomile: Just calmly explain the difference so that they understand. It took me forever to learn all the LGBTQ+ terms (and I’m still learning) so it’s good to be patient with people.

M: I still say that they are two very different things, regardless of what people might think or say. Romantic attraction and sexual attraction are fundamentally different.

Syren: I definitely think they’re not the same thing. It seems pretty cut and dry to me, but I guess it’s just harder for some people to understand?

Jynn: I think they’re misinformed. I’m asexual, and even I used to have that misconception when I was younger.

Anon asked: Can you dig Elvis?

Chamomile: no.

M: Is dug.

Syren: …….. I can dig Elvis. *violent flashback to That Fic* Why would you do this

Jynn: I can dig the King baby.

Anon asked: Gandalf or Dumbledore?

Chamomile: Dumbledore

M: Gandalf

Syren: Gandalfff

Jynn: I’ve never read LOTR so can’t make the call.

Anon asked: For May’s AtA: Gurry, Geno, and I are graduating in the 15th, so out of curiosity, I was wondering if any of you had some fond memories of your graduations. If you don’t mind sharing, of course.

Chamomile: Okay so I mix up words and letter orders a lot, so when I was ordering my graduation gown, instead of writing down 5’6” and 160lbs, I wrote down 6’5” and 160lbs. So my gown comes in and it’s GINORMOUS and I had to hem it the best that I could, but in all of my graduation pictures, it looks like i’m being swallowed up by my gown. It was also a really sad-sweet experience for me? My final school was the longest I had ever attended one school (3 years), so there was a lot of crying and laughing with my friends. (I graduated on a Friday and packed up my things to move to Texas on Sunday morning, so you know, it was a //very// tearful Saturday with my friends)

M: Well, I didn’t particularly like high school, so my fond memories of graduation included being able to leave :/

Syren: I’m a junior, so I don’t have memories of that yet :( But at my sister’s a few years ago, we all had to go through metal detectors and get searched cause there was a rumored shooting

Jynn: Just graduating was a miracle for me honestly. I finished school on homebound and it took an extra year for me to graduate, so I had to watch my class walk without me. My teacher did pull some strings, and I did get to walk with the next class a year later when I never thought I’d get to at all. Our school colors were blue and white and I had a white gown, so I made myself memorable by dying my hair bright blue the day before the ceremony.

Anon asked: Are any of you single?? 😍😍😍

Chamomile: I’m not single! We’re celebrating our 6th month anniversary this week.

M: Uh, well, technically yes. (It’s a bit complicated, to be completely honest…)

Syren: Yup! I am also a wee 17 y/o with no interest in getting a gf just yet

Jynn: Happily taken!

Anon asked: Do the admins have jobs? If so, what do you do?

Chamomile: I have my new coffee shop job! I also do nannying.

M: I worked in IT up until recently, and before that I worked for a butlering / catering service and did freelance voice acting work (which I still do on the side now). I’m hoping to snag something for the summer, so crossing fingers on that one!

Syren: I work at a daycare for a few hours after school every day, and it’s the best job ever. The kid’s are amazing and hilarious, and working there has honestly made me understand so much more why some kids turn out to be d-bags as teens.

Jynn: I have two part time jobs. I’m a game master at an escape room, which I absolutely love, and a lifeguard at a school affiliated wellness center. I also do a bit of modeling and general management product promotion. Trying to get back into voice work atm too!

@thechubbyballerina asked: @admin chamomile, what is the weirdest thing that’s happened at the coffee shop?

Chamomile: So far, nothing much has happened, but I did accidentally get locked out while taking out the trash and I had to call the other night worker (who was in the office doing money counting) to come let me back inside. Not sure if that counts as weird, but it was raining and like, 10pm

Anon asked: Do you work in a small family owned coffee shop or a commercial kind (like Starbucks)?

Chamomile: it’s a family coffee shop inside of a larger restaurant! Sometimes I have to double as a waitress, but mostly I’m just making coffees and selling pastries.

Anon asked: my friend and i saw admin m's personal blog profile pic and we're a lil bit obsessed [[😬]] are they still single?? we know they were sometime before but can't remember (asking for a friend obvs hahahaaa 😅 plsbesingle)

M: Oh uh, thanks, I guess! (?) Like I said before, I’m technically single, yeah.

(P.S. What’s up with all the admin love lately? It’s not like we mind, but we haven’t done anything special lately…)

[kittytishers]

I DON'T REMEMBER YOUR AK TAG SO ALL THE ONES YOU DIDN'T DO YET PLS

gdi spacey

1. You woke up naked next to the last person you texted, what would you say? uhhhh id be pretty fuckin weirded out but considering he lives in georgia id just be like “FIRST OF ALL HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET HERE?????” but like why would i be naked anyways thats the real question who sleeps without their pjs?? dont answer that please i beg

2. What’s going on between you and the last person living being you kissed? He’s pretty sick so we’re taking him to the vet today :(

3. If your significant other was into drugs, would you care? depends on the drugs. if they were into weed id want in on some obvi but anything else and id just be eeeehhhhh naaaaahhhh

4. Is your last name longer than six letters? how does 11 letters sound?

5. Was your last kiss drunk or sober? ive never been drunk in my life so take a wild guess

6. Have you ever wanted to have someone but you messed it up? nope.

7. What does your last received text say? “Ooh”

8. How many times have you kissed the last person living being you kissed? more than i can count -w-

9. Where was your last kiss at?  in my house because we both live there

10. When is the last time you saw your sister? This monday before she headed off to disneyland for her honeymoon!!

11. What do you drink in the morning? milk because its in my cereal

12. Where did you sleep last night? my fuckin bed -.-

13. Do you think relationships are hard? i think with the right person it shouldn’t be that bad.

14. If you could go back and change something in the past 5 months, would you? i wouldve done a different story for my creative writing project

15. You’re locked in a room with the last person living being you kissed, any problems? he’s sick so that would be bad :(

16. Would you rather it be sunny or rainy? sunny

17. Do you know anyone with the same middle name as you? lol nah

18. Are you wearing jeans,sweatpants,or pajama pants? PAJAMA SHORTS HAHAH

19. Do you think you will be in a relationship 3 years from now? I hope so

20. Does anyone like you? Not that i know of

21. Have you ever kissed someone with a name that starts with an S? nope

22. Is the last person living being you kissed gay? I mean he’s neutered so technically he’s ace

23. Is there a person you CANNOT stand? the guy who sits behind me in english -.-

24. Have you ever considered getting a tattoo?  yeah. proll ynot gonna tho

25. In the past week have you cried?  probably

26. What breed was the last dog you saw? my dog is an english springer spaniel so

27. Do you dry off in the shower or out of the shower? out of the shower duh

28. Have you ever kissed a football player? HAHAHAHAH

29. Do you think you’re old? if i think im old i cant call my friends old so im just gonna say no

30. Do you like text messaging? yup

31. What type of day are you having? S T RE SS 

32. Have you ever thought about getting your nose pierced? no but i like how it looks on other people

33. Do you prefer warm or cold weather? cold because SWEATERS

34. Is there a person of the opposite sex who means a lot to you? Three! @pseudonymouslps​ @celestialbomber​ and @luciferhimshelf​!!! they are all great btw follow them if you arent already

35. Would you prefer a relationship or a fling? i want a relationship first and then ill figure out how i feel about flings

36. Are you a simple or complicated person? is anyone a simple person???

37. What song are you listening to? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Etb0xDIFXR4

38. When you say you’re sorry do you mean it? yeah of course.39. Is there a girl that knows everything or almost everything about you? @2cutepandasian​ knows a lot i think. she is my first mother after all40. What made you start liking the person you like now? i mean i don’t have a person i like rn so41. When did you last receive a text message? not quite sure. all i know is the convo started like 6 am my time lmao42. What is wrong with you right now? everyhting???43. How well do you know the last female you texted? my mom continues to confuse me -.-44. Does anyone disgust you? my dog sometimes45. Would you date someone right now if they asked? DEPENDS ON THE PERSON I GUESS??? IDK I THINK ITD BE KINDA WEIRD46. Are you in a good mood right now? i guess so47. Who was the last person you talked to in person? mi madre48. What color shirt are you wearing? black likE MY SOUL49. Has someone recently told you something you didn’t want to hear? i dont want to hear anything my mom says tbh50. Anyone you’re giving up on? nah51. Do you hate the person you fell hardest for? lol i didn’t really fall for anyone

52. Have you ever thought about giving up on someone but couldn’t? no i dont like giving up on people wtf???53. Do you like rain? im an ml fanatic of COURSE 54. Do you care if your significant other drinks? at this age? yeah. when im older than 18 i wont give a fuck55. Have you ever liked somebody and never told them? yeah thats always how it goes 56. Do you like to cuddle? HWO DOESNT??57. Are you shy? not shy just unwilling to engage in conversation with people i dont know or carea bout 58. Do you get along with girls? i get along with anyone i want to59. Have you dated the person you texted last? he’s 5 years older than me ew no like god hes like a brother to me but to date him no wtf??? 60. What do you carry with you at all times? a hair tie and my phone 61. If you were paid 1 million dollars to spend the night in a supposed haunted house, would you? hells yeah. the two outcomes are death or living life rich its a win-win 62. Do you think you can last in a relationship for five months? i mean i hope so 63. Think back to October, were you in a relationship? HAHAHAHAHHAHA 64. The person you like kisses you on the forehead, do you find this cute? i dont like anyone right now but the person i liked a lil while back,,, yeah its be adoarble..;l.,,65. Did anything “cute” happen in the last week? i mean i saw my sister get married like if that isnt cute then idk what else is

66. How old are the last three people living beings you kissed? 4 and 10

67. Would you rather pay to get your nails done or do them yourself? dude nail salons are the best but i can make my own nails i dont really care68. Which do you like better- Zebra print or leopard print?    animal print in general is lowkey trashy imo69. Do you have any stickers on your car?    dont have a car lolol70. Would you rather listen to Luke Bryan or Lil Wayne?    who??71. Blackberry, Android, or iPhone?   iphone fuck yeah 72. When’s the last time you had pizza from Pizza Hut?    looooong time73. Do you like diet soda?    never had any so i cant say74. What color are the walls in your room?    white75. Are you 16 or older?    nope but next year76. Do you watch Pretty Little Liars?    no77. Do you have a job?    no  78. What are your initials?    LZ80. Are you from the south?    I’m from SoCal but not The South™

81. What does your last status on facebook say?    facebook thats cute82. Do you still talk to the first person living being you ever kissed?    of course how else will i yell at him to stop fucking with my shit?83. Are you closer to your mom or your dad?    dad definitely84. Have you ever done cheerleading or gymnastics?    ive done gymnastics before yeah85. What’s the last movie you saw in theaters?    Hidden Figures87. Would you rather wear heels or flip flops?    im in a flip flop mood rn. ive been wearing heels all weekend -.-88. Is your phone touch screen?    yeah90. Have you ever snuck out of your house?    no where tf would i go91. Would you rather swim in a river, lake, or pool?    pool please i dont appreciate fish feces being on my body92. Have you ever made out in a car?    HAH i wish93. …Had sex in a car?    HAHAHAHAHAHAHHA94. Are you single or in a relationship?    take a wild guess based on previous questions its not that hard to figure out i promise95. What were you doing last night at midnight?    screaming at myself to FINISH THE DAMN PAPER96. When’s the last time you saw fireworks?    4th o july97. Do you like the camera on your phone?    it serves its purpose98. Have you ever had a friend with benefits?    nope99. Have you ever passed out from drinking?    nope100. Are you friends with people on facebook that you actually hate?    youre asking as if facebook is still relevent101. Have you ever had a pregnancy scare?    im 15 and ive never had sex in my life. no.102. Name your favorite Kesha song:    WAKA WAKA103. Do you have any tan lines right now?    no but its getting warmer so soonthaank god this bs is over. i wish i could say i hate you but i dont lie

[eyeofthewolfe]

Evil Zane Chapter 5

As the team struggles to find a way to save Zane, Zane and his new ally begin to prepare for their own devious plot. 

Prologue and Chapter 1: here

Chapter 2: here

Chapter 3: here

Chapter 4: here

Chapter 5

 Nya may have steered the ship a tad off course. But it was for a good purpose.

She pulled a lever back to decrease the speed of the ship and pressed a few buttons to activate autopilot on a straight course. Checking the clock next to her, she stepped back and watched the horizon.

As if on cue, a ray of light spewed across the rocky terrain dead ahead of the ship’s course. The sky slowly morphed into a vibrant pastel palette. Pinks and orange merged into purples and blues and the light spilled delicately across the landscape. Nya smiled warmly, as if the sun was opening a new possibility for the day, bringing hope to Ninjago. For a second, she felt like there was nothing wrong in her world.

The moment shattered instantly.

The intercom in the Bounty exploded with Kai screaming for help. Yells from the brig broke the beautiful silence and tremors of multiple heavy footsteps shook the deck. Nya dashed to the intercom and slammed the respond button for the brig. “Kai! What happened?”

“The bird!!” Her brother’s static voice yelled back. “The stupid bird broke the criminals out!”

“What bird?” Nya shouted, but looked up just as a dozen large men exploded from the stairs leading out of the brig. “Kai, take the back, I’m in front! Let’s get some cover and play home advantage!”

“Sounds good.” He responded. “But we need to deal with-“ Kai was interrupted by a flatline.

“You’ve got to be joking,” Nya mumbled as she pulled up her hood. She dashed out of the bridge, flipped off of the railing and landed in front of the men. “We seem to be experiencing some technical difficulties,” Nya snapped. “If you could kindly return to the brig and wait until we solve the problem.”

A criminal with a beard started an uproar of laughter. “You wish, darling!” He grinned. “But I don’t take orders from any girl.”

Anger boiled in Nya’s gut. “You’ll learn soon enough to take orders from this girl,” she sneered and lifted her fists. The mob of men charged.

Nya sprayed water in front of her, causing six of the men to slip and fall hard. She flipped in the air and used the bearded man as a spring-board to catapult herself next to Kai’s side.

“Aw, did he hurt your feelings?” Kai mocked, part of his arm steaming from some hole blasted through his suit.

Nya glared at her brother playfully. “No, I think he was referring to you,” she shot back, and Kai frowned as he pulled up his hood. “Alright, let’s get some cover!” She commanded as they both shot their element towards the giant mob.

The fire and the water combined into a loud hiss as white smoke filled the deck. The men began coughing and stumbling around, suddenly blinded. Nya and Kai jumped into action.

Every punch and kick they made slowly weakened the mob. The smoke disoriented the crew, but Nya and Kai were so familiar with the deck after years of training that they knew where ever bump and deformity lurked. When the smoke cleared, all the men were groaning and squirming on the ground. Nya and Kai high-fived.

Nya pointed at the hole in Kai’s suit. “It looks like that bird somehow got a piece of your suit, Kai.” Nya smiled as she kicked one of the men in the shoulder when he moved to get up.

Kai instantly tensed up, his eyes scanning the sky with fear. “Whoa, Kai,” Nya said with alarm. “What are you worried about?”

“It’s Zane’s bird,” Kai whispered. “It attacked me with laser beams coming out of its beak!” He exclaimed on edge. “It freed these guys!”

Nya glanced around. “Well, it looked like it flew away. C’mon Kai, let’s get these animals back in their cage.”

 __________________________________________________________ 

The Mechanic typed a few more things out on the main computer before turning to the robot. “The cloaking mechanism is operational. Our little birdie is successfully hidden from the ninja.”

Zane eyed the screen, where he watched the live feed from the invisible bird show the two ninja slowly escorting the defeated criminals back to the brig. “Good. Keep me updated on their next move. I want to know what they are up to.” The mechanic nodded as a bell rang in the factory. “That sounds like good news,” The cyborg grinned as he ran over to giant machine. “Sire, I believe your protective armor is complete.”

Zane smiled as the Mechanic lifted the giant piece of armor. Black sleek metal combined with red glowing lines outlined the front and back. The shoulder pads were heavy and equipped for protection and battle. A giant red glowing circle decorated the front middle.  Zane took it and slid it over his head and it comfortably fitted onto his body.

“And your headset, sir,” the crook added as he handed him a small device that wrapped around his left ear. Zane equipped it and pressed the side button. A blue protective screen activated in front of his eyes and a miniature microphone slid towards his mouth. Zane grinned.

“You exceeded my expectations, Mechanic,” he said, fingering the microphone. “How is Phase 1 of the primary project moving along?”

“Smoothly, sir.” He responded and directed the evil nindroid to the main portion of the factory, where the machines were alive and busy molding and cutting dark metal pieces. “The blueprints I made processed correctly so the finished product should be complete in a few hours.”

Zane frowned. “A few hours? That’s as fast as the factory can go?”

The Mechanic nodded, fixing his hat. “It’s quite an ambitious task with a ton of little quirks I’ll need to make by hand.” He lifted his mechanical arm as a joke.

Zane didn’t laugh. “I expect that done by the time the ninja have their next move planned. Or else that hand will be fixing itself.” Zane turned and walked off, leaving a cold chill in the Mechanic’s bones.

__________________________________________________________ 

Lloyd felt the ship slowly come to a stop. Thuds from multiple footsteps above the room meant that they had finally reached the prison and the crooks were on their way to being back behind bars. Groaning, he turned over in his bed and stared across the room where Jay was loudly snoring. Cole was also asleep, but he had earbuds in. Soft classical music could be heard under the snores, and Lloyd couldn’t sleep because of it.

He turned again on his bed and then found himself tracing Lil’ Nelson’s name for the 69th time on his cast. The letters were carefully scripted and large, but it oddly stood out to the green ninja. Lloyd could clearly remember when his handwriting looked like that, mainly because it was like that up until about a year or so when his physical body aged 8 years in 8 seconds. He had to spend a few hours writing words to get used to his new handwriting.

His finger delicately traced the “L”. Nelson was how old, seven? Eight? He was about Lloyd’s age when his childhood was taken. But Nelson was going to live it out, enjoy his young days before they are over-unlike the kid’s idol.

Lloyd didn’t know why his eyes were suddenly burning with tears. He’s accepted his job as a leader for so long, but now he was wondering the what if’s of his life. What if he never aged that fast? Would the final battle have been the same? Would he look at his job as a leader differently? Would he be a better leader if he hadn’t of used the tea all those years ago in the comic book store?

Cringing, Lloyd pushed those thoughts out of his head and stuffed his casts under his sheets. For a second it was peaceful, until Jay snorted in his sleep. “Dear FSM,” Lloyd groaned as he stuffed his pillow over his ears.

 _________________________________________________________

 After locking the men back up at Kryptarium, Kai and Nya steered the Bounty back to the high skies. Kai sheltered his eyes and glanced at the sky. “The sun is almost at high noon. We should probably figure out what we are going to do next. Zane may strike soon along with his little pet bird.” Kai remarked.

Nya rubbed her arm, and Kai instantly recognized it as her unconscious habit of showing her uneasiness. “What’s wrong?” Kai instantly softened his tone.

Nya lifted her gaze and stared out into space. “Do you really think there is no way to save Zane?” She finally asked.

Kai looked out across the horizon as well, realizing the fact that what he had to say was exactly what Nya did not want to hear. “If PIXAL can’t find a solution, then yes, there will be no saving Zane.”

Even the sun felt cold as Kai watched his sister absorb the news. It was like a piece of her heart had been broken and lost forever. “I’m sorry Nya, but if the Overlord has taken over one of the most dangerous and deadly weapons known to Ninjago, then we need to stop him as fast as possible.”

“But I don’t get it,” Nya sighed as she sank into a chair on the deck. “The Overlord has taken over his code, but Zane is still calling himself Zane…that must mean that Zane is still in there but something went wrong. Maybe if we can reboot him with the same code as before the explosion….”

Kai sat down next to her. “That means that we need to capture Zane and hold him down long enough to reprogram him, given that we even know how to reprogram him. The software in his hard drive is encrypted with safeguards and firewalls that were put in place in order to protect himself from what ultimately didn’t work. We would have to bypass all of those, somehow erase and redownload the code, then reactivate Zane. But we won’t even know if that will work in the long run.”

Nya looked up at her brother with an eyebrow raised. “When did you become an expert on robotics?”

Kai shrugged. “When we switched from piloting and keeping watch, I may have had an in-depth conversation with Zane’s best girl.”

Nya grinned. “Alright, let’s blare the wake-up call.”

 __________________________________________________________

Within a few minutes, the team had regathered in the bridge for the third time that day. Lloyd, who looked like he didn’t get a second of sleep, called the team together. “Alright, this is the moment of truth. PIXAL, have you found anything that could save Zane?”

The team fell deadly silent as they all stared at the screen.

PIXAL lowered her gaze. “There is nothing in my logic parameters that would work in order to save Zane,” PIXAL answered, and the team sighed, defeated. Lloyd turned to speak, but was interrupted.

“However,” she said, and the team snapped back to the robot. “I did come to a more…irrational..thought..” The robot said delicately.

“Is that what robots call a crazy idea?” Jay whispered to Cole as he wiped his nose with a tissue. Cole snorted a laugh.

Misako stepped forward. “Anything will work, PIXAL.”

PIXAL waved her hand and blueprints appeared on the screen. “These are Zane’s original blueprints, recovered from the hidden tree bunker where he was built. The blueprints lay out every physical feature that went into building his original design. Some aspects are more unclear than others, but sadly the only person who can answer those questions is Doctor Julien, who passed away years ago.”

“So how does that help us?” Wu asked.

“The blueprints recovered only specify the mechanics and hardware. Every piece that went into building him is marked on that sheet. However…” PIXAL remarked, but Nya suddenly understood where she was going.

“The software!” Nya cried out. “We have no information on his software! PIXAL- you’re a genius!”

The robot smiled. “I am here to assist.”

Nya turned to the team with a smile. “There’s only one place we can find more information on the original design of Zane’s software. It’s quite obvious where we are off to next!” she said.

The green ninja, with a small smile, asked, “Do we know where it is?”

“The location of the hidden tree bunker has been saved into the ship’s global positioning system by our own metal tin can,” Cole answered as he walked over to the map and pressed some buttons. Eventually, a blue dot appeared in the middle of the Birchwood forest. “Bingo.” Cole turned to the team with a smile. “Even after turning evil and defeating us all in the matter of minutes, Zane is still the real MVP.”

Lloyd began to bark orders and the ninja assumed positions. Wu and Misako turned to each other. “Do you think this will work?” She asked under her breath.

Wu pressed his lips together in deep thought. “Robotics…this is out of my comfort zone. For the first time in a while, I feel so old.”

Misako smiled, then quickly glanced around to make sure the ninja weren’t listening. “Speaking of time…” she whispered even softer.

Wu lifted his hand to clasp a golden pocket watch within his robes. “Don’t worry about them Misako. I will deal with them when the time comes. For now, we must worry about Zane.”

“You need to tell the ninja about-“

“No,” Wu said harshly as he eyed the ninja rushing around the bridge. “I can handle this on my own. There are things that I don’t-“ Wu stuttered as his eyes focused on Kai and Nya. “-that I can’t tell them.”

Misako nodded. “I understand, but you are playing a dangerous game.”

Wu nodded, and their discussion ended. The sensei turned to the team. “Ninja, we will need to search the tree home quickly so we can figure out what our next course of action will be. Lloyd, Nya, and Jay will go inside with me. Cole, Kai, and Misako will stay behind to keep watch.”

“Especially for Tree Horns!” Jay said.

“Tree what?” said Lloyd, a look of alarm crossing his face.

“Oooh right, you were captured during that mission,” Jay said, then sneezed. “Huge creatures, long legs that look like trees, basically unstoppable unless you freeze the queen.”

“Do what?” Lloyd gasped, his alarm turned to fear.

The ninja laughed, and for a second, it seemed like all was right in the world. But while they were laughing, they all missed the shift of invisible movement in the corner of the room and the tiny breeze as something flew away.

 ___________________________________________________________

The screen in the factory went dead after the falcon switched off its feed from inside the bridge, hidden completely with its new cloaking device. The Mechanic took off his headset and dashed to Zane.

“Master, the ninja have a plan!” He said. “They are going to a secret tree bunker somewhere in the Birchwood forest! I’m sure I can rewind the feed from the titanium bird to see where on the map it was located-“

The evil robot silenced the man with a wave of his hand. “Nonsense, I know exactly where that is. I will meet the ninja there and slow them down long enough to let you get started on phase 2. Which reminds me,” Zane droned. “Is Phase 1 completed?”

The Mechanic grinned. “She’s a beauty. The last few pieces are being attached now. She will be ready to use in the matter of seconds.”

“Excellent work,” Zane said and drifted off to the center of the factory. “Is it all operational?”

“Yes sir, top of the line- even some futuristic equipment- all ready at your fingertips.”

Zane smiled. “You will be rewarded greatly, Mechanic.” He said as he stopped in front of the machine. “And you are right, she is a beauty.”

The bell rang again through the factory signaling the completion of another project as the machines pulled away from its new creation. Zane reached up to his ear and activated his new screen. It instantly linked with the new giant piece of equipment. Zane smiled, then activated his new ride.

[ethanballsdang-blog]

D.J.J.D. - Hip Hop Ragnarok

Dec 3, 2017 - 4:45 A.M. 

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It’s a gloomy November Wednesday in Sheridan, Wyoming — a town known for cowboys, cowgirls, cowmen, cow-women, and even a few salty cowvestites, and I’m standing outside of what I’m sure is the only video rental store I’ve set eyes on in years. I pull it out of my pocket again: a signed photo of the hottest rap artist alive, on the back of which the cryptic words “C’mere, boy” are written in purple crayon. For a moment, a part of me hopes that the town screecher gave me the wrong address. I’m afraid, I’m skeptical, and I’m irregular. I smell my Sharpies a time or five, and it’s not long before I rediscover my courage.

I open the front door of The Video Depot (a now legendary Mecca of Wyoming Hip-Hop) and see him immediately. On the far side of a silent room, reading the back of an Adam Sandler comedy with wide eyed intensity is Jace Dahlin, or as his fans call him, D.J.J.D: The Godfather of Dumpster Rap.

I say “Hello, my name’s Ethan.” He doesn’t even twitch. “From Dang Magazine?” Nothing. “I think you sent me this.” I hold up the photo of Dahlin that had been handed to me at my office in London 2 days prior by a mute hoverboard courier in Prince cosplay.

“Is this… did I get pranked?” Finally, he puts up a finger, telling me to wait. I do. He keeps reading the slipcover for another for 2 hours, finger in the air. Part of me is fascinated. A bigger part is wishing I’d peed before I came. I persist, trying to read him, reading Sandler.

I start to nod off; each blink of my eyes more drawn out than the last. On the precipice of falling asleep where I stand, I close my eyelids for a couple seconds. When I open them, Dahlin’s face is inches from mine.

I scream in terror and go to step backward, only to feel that my shoelaces are tied together. I crash through the plate glass door into the parking lot. I’m bleeding, moaning, and my bladder betrays me.

I look up as Dahlin steps through the broken window. In his right hand is a key ring. In the other: a 40 oz bottle of Colt 45. He turns around and locks the shattered door dutifully, opens the cap on the Colt, and pours it all over me. I’m certain I’m about to die. I begin trying to rationalize a narrative where this might come across as badass. I can’t think of one. I roll over, close my eyes, and mouth a prayer to the gods of Hip-Hop: “Why?”

Suddenly, I hear a familiar voice. “Now ya felt what life’s like on the streets. Now… we can talk.” I open my eyes to see Dahlin’s outstretched hand. He picks me up.  We walk.

“I hope you don’t mind my zany antics.” says Dahlin, his eyes seemingly focused on on the mountains in the distance. “A lot of rappers today get wacky just to seem wacky, and I think that’s wack.”

The music world seems to agree with D.J.J.D.. Authenticity is a major theme in his latest album, “Wyo Why?”, which just that morning had reached 112 million downloads on Chinese Napster; a first for a hip hop artist. “Rap ain’t a game.” He muses. “That’s what Chutes and Ladders is.”

I follow closely as we traverse the town, taking in his every word. He never looks back, never stops talking, never breaks rhythm. At one point I tap his shoulder to ask if we could get some food. He grabs my hand, autographs it (in permanent marker) and says “There ya go, lil homie. Don’t sell that shit I’ll find you.” before continuing to walk. He never looked at me. This happens a couple more times as we meander through the town. He’s always warm with fans without fully engaging; keeps a distance within the reverence. I don’t even have to ask why before he explains: “Last year, I signed a guy’s tour shirt , and he used the signature to steal my financial identity. Technically I don’t exist now. That’s been great for my creative output.”

After what seems like hours of walking, I realize I haven’t taken my eyes off him since he started speaking. “Baby Dahl” has a quiet charisma that pulls my eyes to his mouth, like a glitter slathered cold sore. “We’re here.” he says, finally breaking my focus. I look around, wondering where a young man with so much to say goes to find the words.

I realize we’re back at Video Depot. Dahlin opens the (still) shattered door and, this time, invites me in. “This is where I come to let my mind spew.” I step inside again, unsure if he realizes I’ve already been here. To my surprise, it does feel different this time. A wave of reverence crashes over me as he turns on the lights. “Every artist needs a sanctuary. Somewhere they can get away, be themselves. Batman has the Batcave,  O.J. has jail. I’ve got V.D.”

He shows me around the room, explaining the significance of every surface, space and decoration. He explains the plot of every D.V.D. on the shelf (including pornography), wrapping every synopsis with the phrase “Yeah it’s pretty good, you should check it out.” Then, despite repeatedly explaining that I understand, he takes 20 minutes to explain what candy is. He insists that I try Sour Patch Kids. I’ve eaten them all my life, but I accept, and I’ll be damned: they’re the best batch I’ve ever tasted.

He offers insight into how film has influenced his music, boasting “I’ve never rapped a single word that wasn’t influenced by “You Don’t Mess with the Zohan.” Suddenly, lyrics I’ve puzzled over like “I’m harder than trigonometry” and “I’m like Rembrandt with a grenade” take on a whole new weight. I make a note to revisit his discography, and buy a copy of “Zohan” when I get home.

By the time he’s finished explaining the plot of Zardoz, The Depot has started to feel like home to me too. I find myself glancing out the window, afraid of the chaotic, cruel world that lies outside. I find myself thinking about all of the atrocities committed in the name of peace throughout history. I wonder how much of history is lies, and how much truth we cover up just to be able to live with ourselves. 

I close my eyes, and suddenly I’m naked, floating on my back in a slow moving  river of blood. It’s dark everywhere and I’m alone; I’m paralyzed. Suddenly, in the distance, I hear a gentle paddling, and the gentle singing of a tune I’m sure I’ve heard but can’t recall when.

“There’s no earthly way of knowing… which direction we are going…”

After what feels like 100 years of waiting, 100 years of listening, a golden gondola illuminated by a dim kerosene lantern pulls beside me. I try to scream, afraid it’s captain doesn’t see me. I’m drowned out by his singing:

“Is it raining? Is it snowing? Is a hurricane a-blowing?”

My terrified, but I’m just so happy to see another living soul after so long. A hand breaks into the frame of my upward gaze, and I tilt my eyes to take in the face of my savior: It’s D.J.J.D.

He and I gasp in terror at the same moment. I close my eyes. Not a speck of light is showing, so the danger must be growing. Are the fires of Hell a-glowing? Is the grisly reaper mowing? I feel him wordlessly pull me into his boat. I feel the ship picking up speed. I’m too afraid to open my eyes. Yes, the danger must be growing, for the rower keeps on rowing. And he’s certainly not showing any signs of slowing! I scream. I scream. I scream.

My eyes open and I’m back in Video Depot; no blood, no darkness, no gondola. I am naked, though. Dahlin is beside me, scribbling in a notebook. My senses start coming into focus; there’s gentle jazz playing. A slideshow of wartime photography is projected on the wall opposite me. What happened?” I whisper as I lift my head off the floor. Without ceasing his writing, Dahlin replies “You saw the future of hip-hop. You didn’t take it well.”

In all my life, I’d never experienced terror like that. I wonder for a moment if Dahlin genuinely possesses mind control powers of some kind. “How did you do that to me? How did you make me see those things? Feel those things? ” I ask, physically afraid of his answer. “That’s the the power of art, dawg. That’s the power of true, honest expression.” I take that statement in, letting the overwhelming truth of it change me. “Oh,” he says, “and those Sour Patch kids were L.S.D.”

With that, I realize that I’m further beyond my depth than I’ve been at any point in my 25 year career in journalism. I wobble to my feet, not bothering to locate my clothes, and walk to the door. As I open the door, I look back one last time before I leave. Dahlin is back in the same spot he was the day before, reading the same DVD. I wave a half hearted goodbye at him before walking out. He doesn’t notice. 

It’s a week later now and I’m back in my home office in London, reading over my notes from my two day incursion with the hottest rapper alive. I send a copy to the Dang offices, so they can pillage my hard earned insights for quotes without context. They’ve asked for more. I can’t reply. I can’t even speak.

I find myself drinking alone, unable to talk to my peers or loved ones.  I haven’t left my apartment in days. When I close my eyes, when I dream at night (and during the day), he’s there. He’s there when I poop. I find myself wondering if I’ve just made the acquaintance of a genius or a madman. I wonder if maybe every genius and every madman had a bit of the other in them. 

I look down at my hand; his signature hasn’t faded. I can’t wash it off, no matter how hard I scrub. His mark has been made on me as it has the world, and there’s no denying him his monument.

 I need help. I need answers. I need enlightenment. I pull a shopworn copy of “You Don’t Mess With the Zohan” out of my desk again. I focus my eyes on the spaces between lines. I see nothing. I read on. 

- E.B.

[hometowndruck]

 HIGH SCHOOLS / ROME BRAVES / LOCAL COLLEGES / COMMUNITY EVENTS

NEW THIS MORNING

Georgia Tech basketball coach Josh Pastner to be in Rome on Tuesday, Aug. 8: This is a great chance to hear Josh Pastner talk about his dazzling first season with Tech and what’s ahead in 2017-18. The gathering begins at 6 p.m. Heritage First Bank, 501 Broad St., Rome. The agenda: 6 p.m., food and refreshments. 6:30: Introduction by the Rome Georgia Tech Network. 6:35: Pastner’s talk followed by Q&A. For more, please email: greasy.jacket@gmail.com

Georgia High School Football Daily. Strong showing for the Rome Wolves in the 5A preseason all-state team. Football Daily

  On Tuesday, Aug. 8, 2017, the Watters Historical Preservation Society and Model High School will present ‘A Season to Remember’ in the Model High School auditorium beginning at 6:30 PM.  The project highlights the 1954 Blue Devil football team and its run through the regular season to the state championship game vs. Claxton.  The program includes interviews by Randy Davis, owner of WLAQ Radio and Hunter Hays, 2017 Model High School graduate and football player, of players and cheerleaders from the 1954 championship team.  The interviews provide interesting stories leading to a viewing of the actual championship game versus Claxton as narrated by Davis and Jerome Webb, an all-state end on the 1954 Model team. The collaborative project was the brainchild of Jack Dickey, president of the Watters society, who approached Model High Principal Scott Savage about the idea.  Mr. Savage shared the idea with Model High Business Department Chair, Bill Hosmer, who served as project manager and involved his communications class students in the project. Hosmer says he is pleased to be part of the project for two reasons: 1) “It is an honor to play a small part in preserving a proud moment in Model Blue Devil heritage”, and 2) “The project presents an abundance of student learning opportunities within a relative context.”  Students acquired audio and video assets using Canon cameras and ZOOM recording equipment, then edited these assets using Adobe Creative Cloud 2017 software, particularly Photoshop, Premiere Pro, After Effects, and Audition.  The result is a video series including: The Cheerleaders, The Pre-Season, The Season, The Game, and The Coaches.  The public is cordially invited to attend.  Admission is free. (Story and photo contributed by Bill Hosmer.)

HIGH SCHOOLS

Model High intrasquard scrimmage set for 5:30-7 p.m. Friday at Woodard-Tuggle Stadium. The practice starts at 5:30 p.m. and the scrimmage at 6. Free admission. Parents are asked to bring sports drinks (Powerade/Gatorade) in any quantity, bottles or powder. The sports drinks will be used for pre-game meals during the season. Season tickets also will be on sale for $30 (which save you money and no standing in line). Also, Coach Powers and the TD Club will be around to update you on the upcoming events and opportunities.

Rome High/Middle Schools’ third annual Soap Game returns Friday at Barron Stadium. Wolves

Georgia High School Football Daily. Football Daily

John McClellan on the 2017 high school season: What you need to know about new coaches, rules changes, the playoffs and more. Click McClellan.

2017 high school football schedule across Northwest Georgia. Click high school

Your school-by-school look at the start of high school football season. Includes notes on upcoming events, scrimmages and the first official games of the season. Send updates to druck@hometownheadlines.com.

Armuchee: Opens Aug. 18 at LaFayette. Also: Pictures are Aug. 4 and Meet the Tribe is Aug. 5. Scrimmage Aug. 11 at Southwest Whitfield.

Coosa: Hosts Coahulla Creek on Aug. 25. Scrimmage Aug. 11 hosting Pickens.

Darlington: Hosts Gaston, Ala., on Aug. 25. Scrimmage Aug. 11  hosting Rockmart.

Model: Hosts Sonoraville Aug. 25. Also: Season tickets go on sale; $30 for all five home games. Pickup at the field house 6 p.m. Monday-Friday. Scrimmage Aug. 11 hosting Cedartown.

Pepperell: At Ridgeland Aug. 25. Scrimmage Aug. 11 hosting Paulding County. Scrimmage Aug. 18 at Cass.

Rome: Discount cards with proceeds helping the Rome Wolves football team now on sale; contact Chris and Sherri Cromer. Hosts Harrison Aug. 25. Scrimmage Aug. 11 hosting Pepplebrook.

Unity: Hosts Shiloh Hills Christian on Aug. 18. Scrimmage Aug. 12 v. Twiggs Academy at John Hancock Academy

Cartersville: At Allatoona Aug. 18. Scrimmage Aug. 11 at Westminster.

Adairsville: Hosts Ridgeland Aug. 18. Scrimmage Aug. 11 hosting Woodland.

Cass: Scrimmage Aug. 18 hosting Pepperell.

Woodland: Hosts River Ridge Aug. 18. Scrimmage Aug. 11 at Adairsville.

Calhoun: Hosts Douglas Aug. 18. Scrimmage Aug. 11 at Northwest Whitfield.

Gordon Central: Hosts Murray County Aug. 18. Scrimmage Aug. 11 at Sonoraville.

Sonoraville: At Model Aug. 25. Scrimmage Aug. 11 hosting Gordon Central.

Chattooga: Hosts Fort Payne, Ala., on Aug. 25. Scrimmage Aug. 11 at Trion.

Trion: Scrimmage Aug. 11 hosting Chattooga.

Rockmart: At Cedartown on Aug. 18. Scrimmage Aug. 4, hosting Bowdon. Scrimmage Aug. 11 at Darlington.

Cedartown: Hosts Rockmart Aug. 18. Scrimmage Aug. 11 at Model.

ROME BRAVES

The Braves’ Kevin Josephina goes topside during one play Wednesday afternoon. Photo by Mills Fitzner. For more, please click gallery.

Rome Braves win seventh straight in 5-0 shutout of the Augusta Greenjackets. Media release: The Rome Braves picked up their seventh straight win, defeating the Augusta GreenJackets Wednesday afternoon in a 5-0 shutout at State Mutual Stadium before 1,046 fans. Rome came out of the gate rolling in the first inning, scoring two runs on a throwing error, and another on a Lucas Herbert RBI double for the 3-0 lead. The Braves did not score again until the eighth inning, when Drew Lugbauer lugged out an RBI triple, and later scored on a Leudys Baez single for the 5-0 lead. Jon Kennedy shut Augusta down in order in the ninth to give Rome the 5-0 victory. Bryse Wilson had a strong outing for the Braves, pitching six scoreless innings, giving up four hits with six strikeouts. Wilson (6-5) gets the win for Rome while Augusta’s Melvin Adon (3-9) suffers the loss. Kennedy (5) picks up the save.

What’s next:. Asheville series starts tonight at 7. Friday at 7 , Saturday at 6 and Sunday at 2 p.m.

Mills Fitzner’s home game photo gallery.

Roster updates: 

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

ATLANTA FALCONS

Training camp in Flowery Branch is under way. When, how to see the Falcons as they begin practice for the 2017 season. Preseason schedule: Aug. 10 at Dolphins, Aug. 20 at Steelers, Aug. 26 vs. Cardinals at home and Aug. 31 vs. Jaguars at home. Click Falcons

LOCAL COLLEGES

Berry Vikings sports updates.

Football: First game at Maryville on Sept. 2 at 1 p.m.

Shorter Hawks sports updates.

Shorter University announces Danielle Brewer will become head coach of women’s softball. Brewer joined Shorter’s softball coaching staff in 2016 as an assistant coach. A native of Orlando,  she made her collegiate start at Pensacola State College before finishing her career at the University of Central Florida; where she graduated with a degree in Sports and Exercise Science. While at UCF, Brewer was named an NFCA All-American Scholar Athlete Award recipient and was a member of the Conference USA Commissioner’s Academic Honor Roll. Brewer began her coaching career as a graduate assistant at Auburn University; during which, she was a part of Auburn’s historic run to the Women’s College World Series and runner-up finish in 2016. While at Auburn, Brewer completed her Master of Education in Physical Activity and Health, graduating in May 2016. “I am extremely grateful and blessed to be having this opportunity at Shorter University to be the head softball coach,” Brewer said. Expanded release

Football: First game vs. Mars Hill at Barron Stadium, 1 p.m. Sept. 2. Schedule

Georgia Highlands sports reports.

Georgia Northwestern Technical College sports updates. 

COMMUNITY

The 31st Annual Roman Rumble 5K Run and 2 Mile Health Walk is Saturday, Sept. 16. Background 

The Harbin Hero Hustle returns to the streets of downtown Rome on Saturday, Oct. 14. Here’s how to sign up

Also: See how the hustle is tied into the Harbin Hero Challenge and how you can help five local nonprofits earn at least $500. Challenger

Arsenal fall recreational soccer league returns: Schools are back in session and we are ready to play soccer. The league is for ages 4 to 15 for boys and girls.  Early registration is under way and runs through Aug. 22. Focus of this league is participation and fun. Fundamental skills of the game are developed and refined through activities and games. Sportsmanship, respect and responsibility are all key components of this league. All our recreational coaches are licensed through Georgia Soccer. Every game starts with a prayer and ends with a handshake. Practices are held once a week for an hour. Practices begin Aug. 28. Games are played on Fridays or Saturdays. Games begin Sept. 8/9 and end Nov. 3/4 (nine-week, eight-game season). Every child receives an award at the end of the season and there is a season-ending party for players and their team. Age groups are 6U, 8U, 10U, 12U and 15U with separate boys and girls divisions in each age group.    

Early registration discount:  YMCA members  $69; potential members, $109.                           

A $10 regular registration increase applies after Aug. 22. 

Cost includes jersey, end of season award and end of season party as well as Georgia Soccer Association registration.  

 Lil’ Gunners fall preschool soccer: Classes focus on introducing soccer through outrageously fun games and activities. We help develop social, emotional, and cognitive skills while providing physical exercise and developing players who are good teammates – on and off the soccer field. Classes meet at Grizzard Park on Thursdays  from 4:50-5:25 p.m. There is a maximum of 15 participants per class. Cost: $26 for Y members; $40 for nonmembers. Session 1: Sept. 7, 14, 21 and 28. Session 2: Oct. 12, 19, 26 and Nov. 2. Cost includes team shirt and medal.

Updated Chick-fil-A Dwarf House Sports: Rome Braves get seventh consecutive win in sweep of Augusta. Model to screen ‘A Season to Remember’ for free Tuesday. Former assistant Danielle Brewer named Shorter softball coach. More high school updates.  HIGH SCHOOLS / ROME BRAVES / LOCAL COLLEGES / COMMUNITY EVENTS NEW THIS MORNING Georgia Tech basketball coach Josh Pastner to be in Rome on Tuesday, Aug.

[hometowndruck]

 HIGH SCHOOLS / ROME BRAVES / LOCAL COLLEGES / COMMUNITY EVENTS

On Tuesday, Aug. 8, 2017, the Watters Historical Preservation Society and Model High School will present ‘A Season to Remember’ in the Model High School auditorium beginning at 6:30 PM.  The project highlights the 1954 Blue Devil football team and its run through the regular season to the state championship game vs. Claxton.  The program includes interviews by Randy Davis, owner of WLAQ Radio and Hunter Hays, 2017 Model High School graduate and football player, of players and cheerleaders from the 1954 championship team.  The interviews provide interesting stories leading to a viewing of the actual championship game versus Claxton as narrated by Davis and Jerome Webb, an all-state end on the 1954 Model team. The collaborative project was the brainchild of Jack Dickey, president of the Watters society, who approached Model High Principal Scott Savage about the idea.  Mr. Savage shared the idea with Model High Business Department Chair, Bill Hosmer, who served as project manager and involved his communications class students in the project. Hosmer says he is pleased to be part of the project for two reasons: 1) “It is an honor to play a small part in preserving a proud moment in Model Blue Devil heritage”, and 2) “The project presents an abundance of student learning opportunities within a relative context.”  Students acquired audio and video assets using Canon cameras and ZOOM recording equipment, then edited these assets using Adobe Creative Cloud 2017 software, particularly Photoshop, Premiere Pro, After Effects, and Audition.  The result is a video series including: The Cheerleaders, The Pre-Season, The Season, The Game, and The Coaches.  The public is cordially invited to attend.  Admission is free. (Story and photo contributed by Bill Hosmer.)

HIGH SCHOOLS

Model High intrasquard scrimmage set for 5:30-7 p.m. Friday at Woodard-Tuggle Stadium. The practice starts at 5:30 p.m. and the scrimmage at 6. Free admission. Parents are asked to bring sports drinks (Powerade/Gatorade) in any quantity, bottles or powder. The sports drinks will be used for pre-game meals during the season. Season tickets also will be on sale for $30 (which save you money and no standing in line). Also, Coach Powers and the TD Club will be around to update you on the upcoming events and opportunities.

Rome High/Middle Schools’ third annual Soap Game returns Friday at Barron Stadium. Wolves

Georgia High School Football Daily. Football Daily

John McClellan on the 2017 high school season: What you need to know about new coaches, rules changes, the playoffs and more. Click McClellan.

2017 high school football schedule across Northwest Georgia. Click high school

Your school-by-school look at the start of high school football season. Includes notes on upcoming events, scrimmages and the first official games of the season. Send updates to druck@hometownheadlines.com.

Armuchee: Opens Aug. 18 at LaFayette. Also: Pictures are Aug. 4 and Meet the Tribe is Aug. 5. Scrimmage Aug. 11 at Southwest Whitfield.

Coosa: Hosts Coahulla Creek on Aug. 25. Scrimmage Aug. 11 hosting Pickens.

Darlington: Hosts Gaston, Ala., on Aug. 25. Scrimmage Aug. 11  hosting Rockmart.

Model: Hosts Sonoraville Aug. 25. Also: Season tickets go on sale; $30 for all five home games. Pickup at the field house 6 p.m. Monday-Friday. Scrimmage Aug. 11 hosting Cedartown.

Pepperell: At Ridgeland Aug. 25. Scrimmage Aug. 11 hosting Paulding County. Scrimmage Aug. 18 at Cass.

Rome: Discount cards with proceeds helping the Rome Wolves football team now on sale; contact Chris and Sherri Cromer. Hosts Harrison Aug. 25. Scrimmage Aug. 11 hosting Pepplebrook.

Unity: Hosts Shiloh Hills Christian on Aug. 18. Scrimmage Aug. 12 v. Twiggs Academy at John Hancock Academy

Cartersville: At Allatoona Aug. 18. Scrimmage Aug. 11 at Westminster.

Adairsville: Hosts Ridgeland Aug. 18. Scrimmage Aug. 11 hosting Woodland.

Cass: Scrimmage Aug. 18 hosting Pepperell.

Woodland: Hosts River Ridge Aug. 18. Scrimmage Aug. 11 at Adairsville.

Calhoun: Hosts Douglas Aug. 18. Scrimmage Aug. 11 at Northwest Whitfield.

Gordon Central: Hosts Murray County Aug. 18. Scrimmage Aug. 11 at Sonoraville.

Sonoraville: At Model Aug. 25. Scrimmage Aug. 11 hosting Gordon Central.

Chattooga: Hosts Fort Payne, Ala., on Aug. 25. Scrimmage Aug. 11 at Trion.

Trion: Scrimmage Aug. 11 hosting Chattooga.

Rockmart: At Cedartown on Aug. 18. Scrimmage Aug. 4, hosting Bowdon. Scrimmage Aug. 11 at Darlington.

Cedartown: Hosts Rockmart Aug. 18. Scrimmage Aug. 11 at Model.

ROME BRAVES

The Braves’ Kevin Josephina goes topside during one play Wednesday afternoon. Photo by Mills Fitzner. For more, please click gallery.

Rome Braves win seventh straight in 5-0 shutout of the Augusta Greenjackets. Media release: The Rome Braves picked up their seventh straight win, defeating the Augusta GreenJackets Wednesday afternoon in a 5-0 shutout at State Mutual Stadium before 1,046 fans. Rome came out of the gate rolling in the first inning, scoring two runs on a throwing error, and another on a Lucas Herbert RBI double for the 3-0 lead. The Braves did not score again until the eighth inning, when Drew Lugbauer lugged out an RBI triple, and later scored on a Leudys Baez single for the 5-0 lead. Jon Kennedy shut Augusta down in order in the ninth to give Rome the 5-0 victory. Bryse Wilson had a strong outing for the Braves, pitching six scoreless innings, giving up four hits with six strikeouts. Wilson (6-5) gets the win for Rome while Augusta’s Melvin Adon (3-9) suffers the loss. Kennedy (5) picks up the save.

What’s next:. Asheville series starts tonight at 7. Friday at 7 , Saturday at 6 and Sunday at 2 p.m.

Mills Fitzner’s home game photo gallery.

Roster updates: 

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

ATLANTA FALCONS

Training camp in Flowery Branch is under way. When, how to see the Falcons as they begin practice for the 2017 season. Preseason schedule: Aug. 10 at Dolphins, Aug. 20 at Steelers, Aug. 26 vs. Cardinals at home and Aug. 31 vs. Jaguars at home. Click Falcons

LOCAL COLLEGES

Berry Vikings sports updates.

Football: First game at Maryville on Sept. 2 at 1 p.m.

Shorter Hawks sports updates.

Shorter University announces Danielle Brewer will become head coach of women’s softball. Brewer joined Shorter’s softball coaching staff in 2016 as an assistant coach. A native of Orlando,  she made her collegiate start at Pensacola State College before finishing her career at the University of Central Florida; where she graduated with a degree in Sports and Exercise Science. While at UCF, Brewer was named an NFCA All-American Scholar Athlete Award recipient and was a member of the Conference USA Commissioner’s Academic Honor Roll. Brewer began her coaching career as a graduate assistant at Auburn University; during which, she was a part of Auburn’s historic run to the Women’s College World Series and runner-up finish in 2016. While at Auburn, Brewer completed her Master of Education in Physical Activity and Health, graduating in May 2016. “I am extremely grateful and blessed to be having this opportunity at Shorter University to be the head softball coach,” Brewer said. Expanded release

Football: First game vs. Mars Hill at Barron Stadium, 1 p.m. Sept. 2. Schedule

Georgia Highlands sports reports.

Georgia Northwestern Technical College sports updates. 

COMMUNITY

The 31st Annual Roman Rumble 5K Run and 2 Mile Health Walk is Saturday, Sept. 16. Background 

The Harbin Hero Hustle returns to the streets of downtown Rome on Saturday, Oct. 14. Here’s how to sign up

Also: See how the hustle is tied into the Harbin Hero Challenge and how you can help five local nonprofits earn at least $500. Challenger

Arsenal fall recreational soccer league returns: Schools are back in session and we are ready to play soccer. The league is for ages 4 to 15 for boys and girls.  Early registration is under way and runs through Aug. 22. Focus of this league is participation and fun. Fundamental skills of the game are developed and refined through activities and games. Sportsmanship, respect and responsibility are all key components of this league. All our recreational coaches are licensed through Georgia Soccer. Every game starts with a prayer and ends with a handshake. Practices are held once a week for an hour. Practices begin Aug. 28. Games are played on Fridays or Saturdays. Games begin Sept. 8/9 and end Nov. 3/4 (nine-week, eight-game season). Every child receives an award at the end of the season and there is a season-ending party for players and their team. Age groups are 6U, 8U, 10U, 12U and 15U with separate boys and girls divisions in each age group.    

Early registration discount:  YMCA members  $69; potential members, $109.                           

A $10 regular registration increase applies after Aug. 22. 

Cost includes jersey, end of season award and end of season party as well as Georgia Soccer Association registration.  

 Lil’ Gunners fall preschool soccer: Classes focus on introducing soccer through outrageously fun games and activities. We help develop social, emotional, and cognitive skills while providing physical exercise and developing players who are good teammates – on and off the soccer field. Classes meet at Grizzard Park on Thursdays  from 4:50-5:25 p.m. There is a maximum of 15 participants per class. Cost: $26 for Y members; $40 for nonmembers. Session 1: Sept. 7, 14, 21 and 28. Session 2: Oct. 12, 19, 26 and Nov. 2. Cost includes team shirt and medal.

Chick-fil-A Dwarf House Sports: Rome Braves get seventh consecutive win in sweep of Augusta. Model to screen ‘A Season to Remember’ for free Tuesday. Former assistant Danielle Brewer named Shorter softball coach. More high school updates.  HIGH SCHOOLS / ROME BRAVES / LOCAL COLLEGES / COMMUNITY EVENTS On Tuesday, Aug. 8, 2017, the Watters Historical Preservation Society and Model High School will present 'A Season to Remember' in the Model High School auditorium beginning at 6:30 PM.