#welp i guess i have a laptop for now

[kaiserouo]

Yoink

[momentomori24]

The funny thing about my household is that despite the fact my parents are countries apart, hearing them argue with each other for everyone to hear never fully went away. Instead of in person, it's just over the phone. A small upgrade, but not a very useful one.

[clockwayswrites]

Rumors of a Prince

“You could always ask Jason to pay her a visit,” Dick said from where he was lounging, mostly upside down, on the couch in Bruce’s study.

Bruce frowned at him. “I am not going to have Jason kill Vickie Vale.”

“Hey, you’re the one who said kill!” Dick held his hands up or, rather, given his position, down. “I just meant puts some fear into her. Maybe kidnap her for a few days so that she can’t write any more libel.”

Bruce found himself smiling, slightly and against his better judgment. It faded away when he looked back at his laptop. “At least in this case, it wouldn’t do much good. The stories is already out there and, unfortunately, Vale’s take on it has captured the public’s attention.”

“Tim knows I bet… and Babs.”

“Undoubtedly by now.”

“And if those two know, Steph knows. If Steph knows, she’s ranted to Cass.”

“Yes.” This family was impossible to keep things secret in.

“Welp,” Dick said and swung himself to be sitting up normally— or as normally as Dick ever sat. “Then I guess we better tell the others. How do you want to divide this?”

Bruce was grateful that Dick was willing to be his partner in this. “You would be best to take Jason. I’ll speak with Damian. Either of us can catch Duke when he returns from his patrol.”

Dick nodded. “And Tom?”

“I think perhaps it would be best to have as much of the family in the manor as possible,” Bruce said after a moment. “If he destabilizes, I want him to know that we are around and that he is still safe.”

“Alright.” Dick slapped his knees once and stood. “I’ll drag Jason back then. You know he’ll come if it’s for Tom.”

“Make sure he reads the article before he comes over.”

Dick grimaced. “Yeah. Yeah, that would be best. I’m going to bring some food too over with me. Good luck convincing Dami that he can’t go and stab Vickie Vale.”

Bruce pinched the bridge of his nose. “Right. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” Dick chirped as he left for his task.

Bruce dropped his hand.

‘Gotham’s Pale Prince’ stared back at him from the screen.

-

“Seriously?!” Jason burst in through the kitchen door. “Have you read this swill?”

“Yes chum, of course I have,” Bruce said. He shot Dick, who trailing behind Jason’s fury, a look. Dick was supposed to get Jason to read the article before coming over.

Dick just shrugged helplessly and motioned in a way that conveyed Jason had read it and was still clearly quite upset.

“One of the biggest questions is,” Jason said, clearly reading now from the article with the air of Bristol accent he had put on, “perhaps, why the newest Wayne is not in school. Bruce has proven himself to be a champion of the educational system. This is despite the man himself being a college drop out’ like what the fuck?”

“To be fair, I am,” Bruce said.

Jason rolled his eyes and continued. “His oldest ward’— Dick is fucking adopted now, bitch!”

“Boo!” Steph echoed and tossed popcorn at the tablet Jason was holding.

(Bruce was neither sure when Stephanie had arrived nor where she got the popcorn.)

“Never going to college,” Jason said with a jab of his free hand, “and the second oldest never completing high school.’ I was dead you narrow minded shew!”

“Well, I mean, all she knows is that you were supposedly kidnapped by terrorists and tortured for years,” Dick said. He had moved over to help himself to Stephanie’s popcorn and paused raising the next handful to his face. “Okay, no, that’s actually worse.”

“And you are clear on your line that I cannot stab this woman for the dishonor she implies about the family?” Damian asked, again, as he joined them in the kitchen.

“Unfortunately we have to handle this the proper way, with a press conference,” Bruce said. Stabbing was looking increasingly appealing though.

Jason dropped into one of the open chairs. “I’d call it a battle of the wits, but I don’t think Vale has any left with this trash she’s writing!”

“Alright,” Tim said as he entered the kitchen with almost as much fury as Jason, just more contained. Cass followed in his wake. “I am sure that B has already run through no killing, no stabbing, no maiming, no poisoning—”

“No poisoning Vickie Vale,” Bruce said, feeling so tired.

“Way to go, Timbit, now we can’t poison her,” Jason groused.

Tim sighed, “Fair, I shouldn’t have assumed. I really thought someone else would have brought it up already.”

“People went for more bloody options,” Dick explained.

“Also fair,” Tim said, pointing at him. “Anyways, since we can’t do all that, can I ruin her reputation?”

“Tim,” Bruce sighed.

“Now come on old man, let’s here Timtam out,” Jason said, holding out his arm. “You said yourself we had to handle the proper way and I’m sure that our little socialite here knows just how to ruin her through something like a press conference.”

“You I can stab,” Tim said with a shark sharp smile towards Jason.

Jason returned it with a smile like broken glass. “You can try.”

“Oh, if you keep calling me a socialite I will try and I will manage.”

“Boys, please.”

“Are people threatening blood and violence again?”

Every head in the room swiveled towards the door to the hall.

Tom almost recoiled at the sudden attention of all of the family, taking a half step back and looking a little wide eyed.

Cass walked forward and wrapped her arm around Tom’s. “Tim is. To Jason.”

It took a moment for Tom to tear his eyes away from the family to look at his sister. “Of course. What’s… it about this time?”

“Jason is reminding Tim that he’s a rich society brat and Tim hates to be reminded about that even though it’s true because Tim is also a little freak and the upper crust would be applaud if they knew even a fraction of it,” Steph said before she stuffed his mouth full of more popcorn.

Everyone in the room paused for a moment.

“No, yep, I think that’s pretty much spot on,” Dick said. He wasn’t even pretending not to laugh.

The laughter was infectious and almost everyone was either snickering or outright laughing. Bruce even quirked up a little smile. Tom still looked mostly confused but at least less nervous.

“Come sit by me, little shadow,” Dick said with a smile.

When Thomas settled next to Dick, who immediately wrapped an arm around him, the room settled again into that slightly somber mood.

“What is going on?” Tom asked, voice small. There were times when he still seemed unsure if he could be a presence in a room or consternation. It was something that they were still working on as a family.

Bruce sighed. “A reporter found out about you and wrote an article with mostly speculation. Unfortunately, because of who I am in the city and my existing tendency to adopt, it’s getting attention.”

Tom chewed on his lip and Bruce just hoped he wouldn’t worry it so much it bled. “Bad?”

“Not bad towards you, but unkind. She made a lot of guesses and fact reasons about why the public hasn’t seen you,” Bruce explained.

“Oh. Am I…?”

The dropping of words wasn’t the best sign. Dick pulled Tom into his lap.

“No. Most of the children didn’t attend the press conference announcing them and you don’t have to either. But I will need to make one simply to clear up some of rumors. I wont say anything that you don’t want me to say.”

“Bruce and I can plan it out,” Tim said, “and then run it by you if you want to look over it.”

“Can… will… if anyone wants to help…”

“Of course!” Dick said cheerfully. “We can make a lunch of it or something. It will be the best press conference yet.”

“Yeah. And you don’t even have to watch it,” Jason said. “We’ll plan something fun for that day. The old man can go and do the hard work and we’ll enjoy ourselves.”

“Thank you, Jason,” Bruce said dryly, pretending he wasn’t warmed still whenever Jason refereed to him as anything approaching father.

“It’s what you deserve,” Jason said and tossed his tablet, cleared of the article, on the table. “Come on, let’s plan what we’re going to do.”

“The zoo is always enjoyable,” Damian said.

“You always say zoo,” Cass pointed out as she perched next to Jason.

“What about the park?” Steph suggested. She joined the others at the table and passed around her popcorn.

“Nah, Ivy has a new variety of tulips. I’m worried some of them might turn man eating again,” Dick said.

“We could head out of Gotham I guess,” Jason pointed out and pulled up the map.

Bruce slipped quietly out of the room with Tim on his heels.

“You can stay with them and help them plan,” Bruce offered. Tim was always too grownup, had been since before he came to Bruce.

Tim just shook his head. “I’m never the best distraction. I’ll be more use to you. Besides, I have some plans to run by you that doesn’t need the blood thirsty contingency hearing about.”

“Of course you do,” Bruce said with both a sigh and a smile.

“Nothing physical,” Tim defended himself. “I can ruin her legally.”

“That I have no doubt of.”

No matter what, Bruce had absolutely no doubt that the family would be there for Tom. They were a family, after all.

---

AN: Vickie Vale won't know what hit her. Esp after what she wrote.

Don't know if this will become a full sequel or not, but it was fun to revisit this universe and see how they've progressed!

[heartfullofleeches]

You've got mail!

Alt title: Single Ghost babes in your area

Yan Chain-Letter Entity + Amab/G.N "Loser" Reader [smut, mdni]

[Tags: light horror elements, masturbation, tit fucking]

-

!WARNING!

Now that you've read this, there is no going back.

The woman in this photo was a young bride getting for her big day. Following traditions of her new family, she was forced to wear her veil the entire week predating the ceremony, and quite unhappy with her situation. Her marriage was arranged and she had yet to fall for her new husband. She begged for a way out, help given in the form a voice from the shadows offering to change her appearance the night before her wedding. When her husband and in-laws saw her new face the next day - they all went mad from terror. This image is the only picture of her face and she'll do anything to keep it hidden.

Send this message to eight people in seven days, or she'll visit you at midnight on the final day."

"...."

"... hear me out..."

The air stills - warranted caution to keep your big mouth shut where input was not needed - or wanted.

"Why is she hot?..."

A collective, drawn out groan harmonizes from those plagued by your company.

"..what the actual fuck is wrong with you?"

Below the totally scary and terror inducing text was a photo of a woman shrouded in darkness. Part of her dark outline rooted from the shadowy grey veil draping to her long, thin neck, and waist-length jet black hair framing her pale, ashen skin. Her sunken eyes and mouth agap in a silent scream stretched the cloth against her hollow cheeks - small, white irises fainty visible from her empty sockets and the veil that hide them. The same white eyes your friend had alleged to have been staring them back at them when they looked in the mirror all week.

As unsettling as the picture was to most in your group, your eyes had settled on the more pleasant sight of her shapely figure shown off in the tightly fitted, lacey gown she wore.

"What?! I can't be the only one that noticed how huge her tits are! I hate when people make these cheesy attempts to scare you, and the monster that's supposed to be sooo scary is just some ghost. You can't even really see her face in the first place!"

"God, how do we put up with you... Just make sure you send that back to the rest of us before you leave."

The bulk of your collective friend group had gathered to comfort the unfortunate soul who received the email, and squander their fears by sending it between one another to meet the chain letter's rule. You tagged along for the offer of free lunch, and now that you've gotten your meal you're ready to head home and avoid meeting these people again with the exception of an online space. You stand up from the table, tucking your phone into your back pocket.

"Yea, yea I'll do it when I get home."

"Y/n..."

"I said I'll do it later. I promise, as soon as I get through the door I'll do it."

-

11:58....

11:59....

12..

Opening your eyes, you expect to find angry, sunken eyes staring back, but all you see is the blank white wall of your ceiling. A week ago, you sorta forgot about the whole chain letter scare by the time you made it home, and only remembered minutes before the deadline upon realizing how pathetic it'd look if you died with your dick in your hands when you opened a new priva tab on your laptop. As figured, not a damn thing happened upon the stroke of midnight and quite frankly you felt it must've just been some stupid prank by your friends after not hearing a word from any of them during that time frame. You guessed there'd be no hot ghost chick to cause your untimely demise this time - but it never hurt to make sure.

"Gee, I sure hope a sexy ghost doesn't pop out to kill me right as I pull down my sweatpants. That would sure suck, and the embarrassment alone would probably end me!"

Nothing. You reopen your laptop with a heavy sigh. "Welp- Since I'm still alive, guess it's back to tonight's scheduled plans."

Tugging one hand into the waist of your sweats, you pull up one of your usual sites for quality adult content - scouring for the right material to fit the mood. Alot of good choices, but strangely every thumbnail you clicked lead to a dead link. You switch to multiple sights, but the same thing just kept happening. Frustrated, you don't bother wasting time looking at the preview of a message sent by one of your friends as you scroll. If they could wait this long to text you, they could wait a little longer for you to respond.

Ready to throw in the towel and let your imagination work its magic - you finally manage to get a stream open through sheer determination and miscellaneous presses.

"Finally...." You push your sweats past your thighs as the video opens on a woman sitting on a bed. The room is too dark to see most of her, but the camera and lighting was centered on all you needed to see to pull out your swelling length. The woman's flowing gown hugged the plump flesh of her thighs, rolling up to her hips - and revealing the of her transparent fabric of her underwear as she parted her legs slowly. She removes one strap from her shoulder, long hair falling over her breasts as she contorted to better fit her face into frame.

Head crashing into your pillow with a small groan, you fist your cock to the woman's beautiful image and thought of her large tits in placement of your palm. Your hand could only mirror a fraction of their softness and you whine as your thumb pressing the tip, picturing plush lips closing around you as you came. Your entire being yearned to paint her pretty face and chest in your release - narrowly avoiding the unnatural whites of her eyes at the intensity and build up of your climax left your own body out of your control.

Peeling your eyes open for the second time, the speed of your hand slows as you start to get the odd feeling of being watched. Looking back at the screen, the woman stares back, appearing directly in front of the camera as cold sweat breaks down your neck. Her fingers slither along the glass, reaching through your monitor as your eyes widen in horror. You scream- throwing the laptop as far from your person as you coward against the bedframe. It lands, screen upwards feet from your bed. Loud cracks and snaps play from the speakers as the woman pulls herself free with janky, articulated movements. Her gown falls down to her knees and her veil washes over her face as she climbs to her feet.

You pull your blankets over your shamefully, almost painfully hard dick as you raise your hands in defeat. "Please don't kill me! I'll send the messages right now, for real!'

The woman cocks her head to one side - eyes shrinking as you cover yourself.

"Don't hide...."

She crawls over your quivering legs, gripping at the end of her veil.

"I've taken on so many face - yet, none of them have ever been called attractive before.... Tell me..."

The room light's flicker as she pulls the veil upwards - slowly revealing the dark void where her face used to be. Thin claw marks drew from the intact flesh of her cheeks and jaw to the permanent shadows gouging her features dug deep as if whatever had done this to her had taken more than just her face. The pearly points of her teeth and the whites of her eyes were all that remained of her mortal beautiful. Shaking in fear, your body betrays your fright as your cock jumps watching her drag her tongue over her sharp rows of teeth.

"Do you think I'm beautiful now?...."

At lost for words, you dip your head in reply - eventually squeaking through a strained voice. "You're the hottest ghost that's ever been in my room.

The woman's body writhes with a full body shutter as she takes the blanket in her hands. "Let's see that I'm the only person in your bedroom... living or otherwise."

You hiss from the cool air enveloping your cock as the entity tears the last shield protecting your shred of dignity away. It not like the had much to begin with, but sleeping with the ghost that most likely killed your friends definitely took whatever was left. Her heated breath fans your skin as your cock springs from your shorts and against her cheek. Turning her head, your muscles lock as her sharp teeth come to contact with the head of your penis. There's some give before them, lips hidden by the shadows of her face puckered around your weeping tip as an impossible long snakes from between the two and spirals down your girth as her breasts spill from her tightly fitted top.

Cradling an arm beneath them, the ghost woman sandwiches cards your dick between her breasts. Her tongue, still working around you, provides lubrication - and lewd suction as she bounces the weight of her large tits in your lap. The tip of her tongue grazes your balls and you feel them tighten as you rock your hips into the supple flesh of her chest. Her tongue squeezes at your increasing pulse and her veil falls back in place as she to uses both hands to better assist her assault on your pulsing dick.

You tangle your hand through her hair, cock swallowed by her breasts and plump lips. Your other gropes at her tits, toying with her nipples as hitched gasps and the growing sloppiness of your thrusts signed your peak. The coil in your lower abdomen breaks right as she pulls her lips from your swollen head, using her tongue, face and breasts to catch the milky fluid that pumps from you in thick spurts. The white streaks contrast the dark silhouette of her face and as she looks up at you, you use a discarded blanket to wipe some of it away before collapsing on your mattress in a sweaty, panting heap.

The cotton touch of your pillow is placed with soft flesh as the woman crawls beside you in bed and pulls you closer to her. She brushes hair away from your clammy forehead, raising her veil to kiss your skin as your arms fall around her.

"Sleep now, my love... We'll play more once you've gotten some rest. I look forward to all the things we'll do in the future. I'm sorry about your friends, but I seem to be more of the jealous type..."

You fight off the spell of exhaustion to shrug lazily with a reply that makes your new wife smile from ear to ear.

"Eh.... fuck 'em, it was worth it."

[0cta9on]

Hey dude,

I thought I give some cute things little activity to do. Well you can skip the first one if you are unavailable right now and head straight to the bottom ask.

_____________________________________________________

If you use Microsoft windows,

Go to your laptop search bar, type in "Command Prompt" or "Terminal" and click enter on the icon. Both kind of the same thing.

(Black screen with some text pop up) click on the screen to type in "python3" and press enter.

Copy and paste this after the ">>>" (it will say warning, just paste anyway)

solution = " " while solution != "Minji" : solution = input ("How to make Yuno say yes. Hint: Her first name: ").upper() if solution == "MINJI": print ("yes, he loves Minji!") else: print ("Nope, try again. Do you even love her bro!")

4. Press enter twice (first enter press for confirming the text enter the text editor, second enter press is for executing the program)

5. Follow what the instruction says. Have fun.

____________________________________________________

Welp if there's an error, that's too bad I guess. Not giving you too many ask so I got a replacement just in case the above prompt isn't working.

I'm curious about your set up when about to start grinding your story?

I do my story on my laptop in MS Word with a split screen to online English dictionary. I got no ownership of a desk and chair. So I do it on my bed with small table. Sometime, I prep a picture of an idol for inspiration (Welp, Sullyoon cute face actually do the work). When I'm not in range of using my laptop, I just write the rough idea down on my phone's note. Watching the idol reality show or fan-made funny moment compilation to boast my spirit to write.

Hello, mikeylo! Unfortunately, I use a macbook to write :,] Don't know exactly what it'll do, but it seems cute :]

Not all the time, but most of the time I'll listen to instrumental music while writing :> I read from this author that listening to music helps him get in the mood to write, but music with words can often get in the way of his train of thought, so instrumental stuff helps him get in the mood without being interrupted by other words. I started doing this a few weeks ago and it's helped me a lot :] Sometimes I just like writing in silence tho, it really depends on how I'm feeling and what kind of scene I'm writing.

[chronicalchaos]

Wick RE Village crossover - Rewritten :D

Welp, another random post after being absent for quite a while.

Hi, i've been sick for a little while now, my keyboard randomly died (i'm writing using the laptop's keyboard) and one of my birds is screaming to sit on my shoulders, but i can't fulfil his neediness 'cus i don't want to pass it onto him...if that's even possible.

So i've been rethinking about the RE AU for wick, i've decided that i'm rewritting it to get closer to the little i know about Resident Evil(basically Village and 7) and what i had imagined for a continuation for the AU.

I spent the day drawing about it (and moping around with toilet paper), here's some of the characters:

little details that changed from the old version:

Tom's not death anymore, but, he still died when the twins were kids. His consciousness lives on inside the metamycis(don't know how to spell that)

John's alive! And he took Tim's place as the fourth lord, he just isn't as present as he probably should be.

Sam gets dismembered the same way as Rose, but he survives.

Travis isn't kidnapped.

Duncan and Sam are adoptive brother, Sam being the youngest one.

There is(at at least i tried to make one) a motif with everyone's outfits: People with connections to the village/city wear at leat one piece of black(Tom's, Duncan's and Sam's don't look as black) clothing.

Tim still is bitter and annoyed as the original, but he's just trying to survive and isn't stuck burying bodies anymore. He still lives at the graveyard.

I guess that's it...if i draw more, write something or have new ideas, i'll (probably) pop up again lol

[eddiestattoos]

Writer Interview!

Tagged by @aintgonnatakethis 💙💙💙

About me

When did you start writing?

I mean. Of course I did writing projects in high school but as far as personal stuff (aka my fics) I was 20

Are there different genres or themes you enjoy reading other than the ones you write?

I mean, sure! I got nothing specific off the top of my head but considering my writing spectrum isn't spectacularly broad, I've been sure to have read something outside of my writing topics

Is there an author you want to emulate or are compared to often?

I've never been one to try to copy others. I admire a ton of y'all and wish I could do better at that in some aspects, but I'm not about to take the words off anyone else's paper so to speak

Can you tell me a little about your writing space?

Generally me, my laptop, on my bed. Some kind of music playing. Generally one of my fandom playlists and most commonly on the weekends

What's your most effective way to muster up a muse?

I honestly... do not have an answer for that. It's a delicate daydream most of the time I guess. My delicate I mean fleeting. I can lose the plot

Did the place(s) you grew up in influence the people and/or places you write

Well I mean technically my mother did get me into the show I wrote my first fic for but as far as where I've taken some of those? Gotta say no

Are there any reoccurring themes in your writing? If so, do they surprise you?

I am a sucker for h/c in any form (emotional, sickfic, injury, etc). Which I mean. Isn't an entire shocker, considering what I've been interested in television and story wise. It's not all my fics but it's around.

About My Characters

Would you please tell me about your current favourite character?

I don't know much about the characters that are consuming much of my brain right now so we won't get into that. So let's talk about Sara Sidle (and Nick Stokes). They have such a beautiful sibling dynamic (and there's a ton of shippers out there who are totally valid I see you). Anyway I've talked about Nick in detail (here). But Sara. She's far from my favourite character on the show but she is a character I've particularly enjoyed writing (especially with him). I have the same vibe with Chloe from Smallville. Very fun to write, not my fave to watch in the first half (and this rewatch I'm currently on hasn't helped)

Which of your characters would you be friends with in real life?

Welp I don't have ocs really so I'm gonna say Sam Carter. I'll join the shopping trips with her and Vala. (I got stuck on this one ok. But she is very sweet I love her we could be friends)

Which of your characters would you dislike the most if you met them?

Rodney McKay. More than likely.

Tell me about the process of coming up with characters.

Again, not an oc girly. But if I do add a side character to a story, it's always one that's connected to a canon character in some way (child, long lost friend, kid they mentored)

Do you notice any recurring traits/themes in your characters?

Nothing specific, no. I don't think so

How do you picture your characters?

My loves, my babies, my besties, my friends. I love these silly guys

About My Writing

What's your reason for writing?

It's a hobby, something I enjoy. I decided to start writing the random daydream csi fic one day and haven't turned back

Is there any specific comment or type of comment from readers that you find particularly motivating?

Honestly? Anything positive. Any joy y'all have in reading is joy I take into writing more. Especially with this long sga project I took on. Some days I'm like this is a massive hole I dug and then there's even a "great update" and I'm like thank you thank you thank you

How do want to be thought about by your readers?

I'm just trying my best out there, I hope people enjoy what I write. And I'm open to chatting do come by we can talk we can be friends!

What do you feel is your greatest strength as a writer?

I think I never lose the essence of the character. I'll always take pride in my characterization skills

Have you been told your greatest strength as a writer by others?

I do remember a couple comments about good poignancy in particularly emotional moments. Which I will definitely take. I do love those scenes and the one in particular is one of my proudest

How do you feel about your own writing?

I love it. Some of it's bad, cringey even. But I am not immune to rereading and thoroughly enjoying my own work

If you were the last person on earth, would you still write?

It's a strong possibility. It'd be a way to keep entertained. And as I said. Will reread.

When you write, are you influenced by what others might enjoy reading, do you write purely for yourself, or is it a mix of both?

I mean it's mostly me, I can't lie. But I have done a couple requests. I'm not actively seeking them but it's been fun when I have. But not to sound like a broken record, rereads! I stick to where I'm comfortable and what I'm comfortable putting out there from me for people to see

Tagging @sga-owns-my-soul @hearteyesmcgarrett @ilkkawhat @jencsi @malcolm-reeds-pineapple and any other writers! Do tell if you wish! Consider me your interviewer!

(PS sorry to snag this but there's a handy template for either mobile or desktop here at the end)

[inthenameofallthingsholy]

Devils Roll The Dice, Angels Roll Their Eyes

Song: Cruel Summer by Taylor Swift

Requested by @dinonuggiesforliferz

Fandom: Daredevil

Ship: Matt Murdock x Reader

On AO3 this is multichapter so here is the link to read it in that format:

————————————————

June 6th, 4:59 pm

Hell’s Kitchen in the summer is a sweltering box of heat and the small office of Nelson and Murdock has no air conditioning.

You sit at the folding table you call  a desk, sweating your ass off and trying to do paperwork. You glance over at the clock and see it is finally 5:00. 

Matt exits his office first, noticing you immediately packing up your purse and putting your heels back on.

“Eager to leave, are you?” His voice startled you at first, but you eased up and chuckled once you realized who spoke.

“Very eager.” You playfully reply as you sling your purse on your shoulder.

“Sorry we’re not the best company.” Matt chuckles. His tie is loose and his suit jacket has vanished due to the heat. His white button down sleeves are rolled up to his elbow and he has a few drops of sweat on his forehead. 

“Trust me Matt Murdock, you are plenty company. But, I have my last essay of the year due tomorrow and my professor will KILL ME if I don’t turn it in on time.”

“3rd year at law school- definitely do not miss that” Foggy emerges from his office drenched in sweat with two ice packs taped to his face. You giggle and explain how Foggy looks to Matt who chuckles accordingly.

“You’re just jealous cause y’all are hotter than Jason Momoa’s biceps!” 

“Awww you think I’m hot” you tease, nearing the door slowly.

“Anyone would.” You stop only for a second when you hear Matt utter so low it’s almost a whisper. 

“Welp! I’m hitting the road. Bye losers!” You wave goodbye whilst walking through the door.

“Bye!” Foggy yells behind you

“Later, Fordham.” You hear Matt call after. He gave you this “affectionate” nickname after finding out what Law school you go to. You haven’t heard him say your real name since then.

————————————————

June 7th, 12:03 am

You’re sitting on your bed, laptop open, mind boggled. You just barely finished your essay and you’re fairly certain it’s the worst thing you’ve ever written in your entire educational career. 

Welp, it’ll have to do you guess. You get up to make some late-night french toast. 

You take out the frying pan and all the ingredients. That’s when you hear a noise coming from your bedroom. I probably just imagined it you think. But then you hear it again

Picking up the frying pan, you slowly approach your bedroom. “Who’s there?” you ask, holding the frying pan above your head.

You turn the corner to see a bloody and bruised man standing in a black shirt, black pants, and a black scarf tied around his head. 

You scream. The stranger jumps “WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU AND WHY ARE YOU IN MY HOUSE”

“…a friend..Fordham…” The stranger groans out. You instantly recognize the voice. “Matt!? What the hell!? What are you wearing!? Why are you beat up!? What is going on!?”

“There’s a lot you don’t know about me…” He croaks as he flops on the bed. 

“Jesus, you need medical attention and now! I’ll call a hospital-“

“No!” Matt chokes. “It’s not safe enough.” 

“Well fuck Matt how the hell am I supposed to-“

“You took nursing classes in college right?” He asks, strained breaths between each word.

“Not good ones and how do you even remember that!?” 

“If you can do basic nursing, you can help me…Please.” 

You get him patched up and somewhat well treated as he explains the situation.

“That’s a lot to carry on you’re shoulders, Matt. You need a day off for once, maybe tomorrow so you can recover from whatever happened tonight.” You advise as you sew up a cut on his back.

“I can’t take a day off. If I take a day off, people get hurt.” He winces through the sentence as you pull the needle.

“…why did you come to me? I am far from a qualified nurse.” You gently touch the stitch you just finished before backing away.

“I was just running on pure adrenaline and the first thing my brain thought was, well, you. 

You feel some blood rush to your cheeks as he says the last word, but you contain your reaction quite well.

“Ok, you can take the bed, i’ll take the sofa. That cool?” You stand up and walk towards the couch to prepare it for yourself.

“I’m sorry I did this, really. Did you finish your essay at least, before I got here?” He put on his shirt as he spoke

“God Matt you are the only person who could spend the night getting beaten to shreds and still have the compassion to ask me if I finished my essay.” You grab a pillow from the bed and put it on the couch. 

“Let’s just say I wouldn’t ask everyone.” 

You elect to ignore that comment and throw him some pajama pants and a T-shirt. “My ex’s, thought it’d be better to sleep in that than your shitty excuse for body armor.”

You turn your back as he changes. 

“Thank you. I mean it.” He sounds the most sincere you think you’ve ever heard him.

“Whatever, you owe me one, Murdock.” 

“Anything you ask, Fordham.”

————————————————

June 29th, 11:55 pm.

That routine continues throughout the month. Every few days Matt shows up in your apartment with something bloody, bruised, or broken for you to fix him up and have a room to sleep in. 

It has become such a routine that you’ve thought to leave the window open most nights. Sometimes you just sit there waiting to see him out the window climbing up your fire escape, wounded. 

But today was different…

You’re watching tv when you hear the noise and immediately rush to the window to help him in. After getting him stitched up you start to move the pillows over when he tells you to wait.

“What if you… didn’t sleep on the couch tonight?” He questioned, walking closer to you.

“You shouldn’t be sleeping on the couch, you’re legs won’t be able to move tomorrow you’ll be so uncomfortable-“

He interrupts you. “That’s not what I meant.” 

You then notice how close he is. Your faces were so close you could feel his breath on your face, and you were sure he could feel yours on his neck. 

“What do you mean..” you slowly ask, knowing the answer and wanting it willingly.

He seems to read your mind as he glides his hand up your arm and to your neck. Your spine shivers with electricity. He pulls you closer and you gasp slightly at the feel of his body on yours. 

Only then does he pull you into the kiss, his other hand entering your hair as you grab the back of his neck. He backs you up as you two desperately search for the bed, taking small breaths between big kisses. You find the door handle and slam your bedroom door behind you, closing off the outside world from what’s about to happen.

The last thing you think before you get lost in it is 

I guess we have a new step in the routine

————————————————

July 15th, 8:12 pm

“Oh come on, we all know i’m gonna win this!” Foggy exclaims

“You are so not!” You and Matt say at practically the same time.

“Well you two sure as hell aren’t! I am the king of the chutes and the ladders!”

The three of you were sat around your folding table  desk, with the chutes and ladders board lay flat on the table.

“May I remind you that we are on the same space.” Matt turns to you “Right?” 

“Right.” You respond. They are both 6 spaces from the end. You’ve been far behind the two of them for a while ever since you hit the big chute in the middle of the board.

“Nooooo she’s lyinggggg you hit a chute two turns ago and you’re back at the beginnninggg” Foggy lies

You laugh as Matt replies “See why don’t I believe you! I’ll trust her over you any day.” 

“Betrayal! Of my partner in law! Does the firm we built together mean nothing to you!” Foggy dramatically flailed his arms, nearly flipping the whole board over.

“Alright Matt just roll so we can all go the fuck home!” You chuckle.

“Alright! Matty needs a new stapler for his desk!” You roll your eyes as Matt presses a button on his phone. The robotic voice reveals “Six.”

The three of you erupt in screams and laughter.

“WHAT ARE THE ODDS!?”Screams Foggy

You’re laughing so hard you think you might choke to death. “Alright, i’m gonna go get a drink from the vending machines, I’ll be right back, you boys be nice!” 

“No promises!” Foggy calls as you leave the office. 

You walk down the stairs to the vending machine and start trying to decide what you want when you notice Matt walking up next to you. 

You knew this would happen eventually. You’d have to talk about the fact you’ve been sleeping together for nearly a month and how that’s gonna affect the two of you. You just really didn’t want to have that talk tonight.

“Hey..” he started, hands hiding in his pockets. 

“Hello.” You continue the conversation, refusing to look at anything other than the drinks, but not really looking at them at all.

“We need to talk about it.” He sighs, hanging his head low. The light from the vending machine shines on his red sunglasses. 

“I assumed we would eventually.” You keep pretending to look at the same sprite and coke can.

“We can’t be together. At least not publicly, or an actual relationship. If a bad person found out who I am and they found out I had a girlfriend, they would go through her to get to me.” 

“I know the superhero spiel, Murdock, I read Batman comics growing up, remember?” Sprite Can, Coke Can, Sprite Can, Coke Can.

“How could I forget.” You wonder if he actually did. He seems to never forget anything about you.

“It’s cool, ok. If you just wanna keep it at crazy sex after a stitch up, that’s all it has to be.” Sprite, Coke, Sprite, Coke, Sprite, Coke. 

“Alright, cool, glad we’re on the same page.” You most definitely are not on the same page, but you aren’t gonna tell him that. Might as well have him like this than not have him at all. And it’s not as if you’re in love with him or anything. Right?

“Sooooo, are you gonna get a drink orrrr.” He breaks you out of your trance. Shit. You still haven’t bought a drink. 

“Course..” Sprite it is then. You pay for the drink and walk back up to the office with Matt, taking awkward sips of your drink the whole way. 

You see Foggy pack up the game and grab his satchel to go. “God you two took forever. Anyway, I’m heading home. Hey Matt, you shouldn’t walk home alone this time of night, could be dangerous.” 

You stifle a chuckle.��

“I’ll be fine, Foggy. You have a car, right, Fordham?” 

You choke on your drink. “What?” 

“Well I just thought that you could drive me home since you can drive and I ya know, can’t.” He smiles at you. He knows you can’t say no.

“Yah, sure, i’ll uh…get my keys.”

————————————————

You get in the car and both of you notice the uncomfortable silence is just a tad too thick while driving.

So, you decide to start off the conversation. “Why are we doing this?” Not a strong start.

“What do you mean?” Matt pretends to be clueless.

“I mean, why am I driving you home tonight.”

“You heard Foggy. It’s not safe for me to walk alone.”

“Yeah and we both know that’s bullshit and that he would’ve let you go alone if you had just insisted you would be fine, so why are we doing this?”

“Our last conversation ended somewhat awkwardly. I wanted to fix that.” 

“And this was the best way you could think to do that? Now you have pretend to go home before patrolling. If anything you’ve inconvenienced both of us in one fell swoop.” 

“You seem upset, let’s talk about this when I get home from patrols.”

“I’m not upset, i’m confused and slightly frustrated. I mean, we agreed that we wouldn’t be a couple and that seemed fine but God, Matt, do you hear yourself? We don’t live together and that isn’t our home, it’s my home. Got that?”

“Of course I know that! Do you know that?” 

You gape at him with awe and offense. You pull the car over in front of a random building to regroup.

At first it’s silent. Then Matt speaks up

“I’m sorry. I just need to keep you safe.” 

“I know” you reply “I just think we should-“ You don’t finish. The look on Matt’s face tells you he hears something, and it probably isn’t good. 

“What is it Matt?” His mannerisms turn frantic. 

“Cut the headlights. Cut the headlights now!” He goes back to listening mode again.

“Get down!” The last thing you see before Matt ducks you down is 5 guys exit the building with guns and masks over their faces they shoot the windshield a few times and then run off in the other direction.

“Fuck!” You realize you’re gonna need to pay for that and the price will not be pretty. You glance over at Matt who’s already got his tie and jacket off and is midway through ripping off his button down to reveal the black shirt.

You reach back behind your seat and grab the scarf you left in the car in January and hand it to him. He ties it around his eyes. 

“Don’t suppose you have extra pants in here” he asks

“Not unless you fit women’s yoga pants.” 

He exits the car quickly and says one thing before running off. 

“Get the hell out of here and fast, get back to your apartment. I’ll be there after I deal with this, granted i’m still alive.”

“Don’t say that, you will be.”

He kisses you on the cheek before he closes the door and runs off.

You turn on the car and drive off in the opposite direction, towards your apartment.

————————————————

The waiting for him to arrive is gruesome. Every hour or so the thought enters your head. 

He’s gone. It’s too late. He won’t be back

Hearing the sound from the bedroom is like music to your ears. You help him stumble in, but you can tell he’s more damaged than you’ve ever treated him for before. 

“Jesus, Matt this is really bad” 

“I’ve been in worse shape…”

You sew a bit of the cut on his leg.

“I mean this is cut to the bone, Matt! You are so lucky I have been researching how to do this better because otherwise you would be totally screwed.”

You hear him chuckle at the word screwed. You roll your eyes at him. 

“As i was saying in the car before all the shooty shooty happened, we should have some ground rules.”

Matt is quiet for a moment before responding “I have a better idea. No rules at all.” 

You think that proposition over while finishing the stitch in his leg. “Maybe just one rule.”

Matt shows he’s listening.

“No falling in love.”

Once again Matt is quiet for a moment, and replies with. 

“Sounds good to be.”

You both sit in a tad bit of silence before he continues.

“Can I kiss you now?” 

You laugh before grabbing his face into a kiss that just like every time before, leads to more

————————————————

August 1st, 12:29 am

You hear the noise come from the window like you have almost every night since June. 

You grab your first aid kit and walk over to your bedroom. 

“Hey Matt, sorry I wasn’t at the window immediately, I was feeding the cat-“

That is not Matt Murdock. The blonde man standing in front of you is staring straight at you. No mask, no blind focus, just a stranger in your home that has taken the place of Matt. 

“Who are you….” Where was a frying pan when a girl needed one. 

“I’m a friend of your little boyfriend… the man in the mask. Devil of Hell’s Kitchen.” He speaks with a thick New York Accent and smells so heavily of cigarettes that you think you’re gonna throw up.

“The Devil usually comes alone. So I ask you again, who are you and why are you in my house.” 

“Well ya see, you’re little boyfriend beat up my guys a few weeks ago, and we found him crawlin back here, to you. So! We need you to send a message to him for us. Tell him if he ever comes at my guys again, you’re pretty little face is gonna be pounded into the pavement. Got that.”

You’re too scared to speak, so you simply nod. 

“But we can’t just leave you in perfect condition like this, then he know we don’t mean business. So come here and gimme your leg.”

————————————————

August 1st, 1:30 am

You’re able to stop the bleeding by the time you hear the window again. This time, you don’t go near it. You stay on your couch and wait for whoever it is to speak.

“Fordham?” Thank God, it’s Matt. 

“Matt!” You try to run towards him but instead fall due to the pain of your cut. 

“Jesus, Fordham!” He runs out of the bedroom and finds you on the floor of your living room, tears streaming. 

“What happened, who did this to you..” Matt sounds mad, his voice resembling the growl of a bear. 

“The boss of those men.. from last month… wanted me to tell you that if you crossed them again they would.. kill me.”

Matt is seething now. He scoops you up and brings you to your bed, grabbing bandages from the first aid kit on the way. 

He says nothing as he wraps your leg. A temporary solution to be solved after he defeats the people that did this. He even says nothing when he’s done, simply kissing you on the forehead before leaving through the window

“Matt, wait!” You yell but he’s already gone. It isn’t long after that you fall asleep

——————————————

August 1st, 8:05 am

You wake up slowly, noticing Matt sitting in a chair in the corner. He’s bloody and bruised again, though you suspect most of the blood isn’t his.

You sit up to help his wounds but he gestures to not move. “I’m fine, it’s you that we need to worry about.” 

“What do you mean?”  You look down at your leg again. It looks way worse than it did yesterday. Actually, earlier today.

“It’s not just a cut, he also dislocated your knee. I can set it but I didn’t want to without you being awake. It also probably won’t be completely healed for another month or so.” 

You pause for a moment. “Do it.” 

You feel a pain when he snaps your knee back into place, but it feel better after it’s over.

“Thank you, Matt.”

“Listen, Fordham, we need to talk.” His voice sounds serious and sad. You look up and notice despite still being with you, his mask is still on, meaning he does not want you to see his eyes for this chat.

“What is it?” You shift to sit up straight on your back.

“We can’t do this anymore. This proves that what we’re doing is unsafe and I can’t risk your life.” 

You feel your heart split in two. You know he can hear your heart rate so you wonder if he can hear it too. You can’t lose him, not now, not ever. 

“No…no I can learn self defense! I can get a gun! You can teach me how to fight! We don’t have to stop!” You plead as you desperately wish you could see Matt’s eyes. 

“People like them are gonna keep coming Fordham, can’t you see I’m trying to protect you!?” 

The raising of his voice makes you freeze. 

“I’m sorry… I would just rather not have you like that than not have you at all.” You know your crying you just don’t care. You watch him approach the window to leave.

“See you at work, Fordham.” 

He exits the window for what you think is the last time. You start to cry harder and harder and harder.

Fuck, you think, i broke my own rule.

I fell in love.

——————————————

August 25th, 9:30 pm

You‘re in your apartment, waiting for the noise, and knowing it’ll never come. In the past few weeks your mental state has been in the gutter, and pain in your knee is not helping. Only one more week and it’ll be fully healed, so you can do basic tasks with it like walk from room to room. 

You know what you need. You need to go down to Josies and just get completely wasted.

And that’s what you plan to do.

————————————————

A few hours later and yeah, completely wasted. You wonder if anyone’s concerned but you’re too out of it to even care. 

“AND THEN… Matt SAVED ME but then he left me and i was really really really really really really REAAALLLY SAD.” You slur your tale of woe to Josie you think is invested in every word you’re saying

“Ok hun, I gotta make a call.” 

“Oki Doki Josie! HAHA that rhymed!” You nearly fall out of your seat. 

You see Josie turn around and dial a number you almost recognize in your drunken state. You then get too distracted by your own hand to pay attention.

About 30 minutes of going on and on drunkenly to Josie, you see a man in a black shirt, black pants, and red glasses. Oh fuck

“Oh good ya here, Matt, she’s been goin off about you bein a supahero all night long. Ya need to take her home.” Josie advises Matt.

“Will do, Josie.” He helps you out of the chair. “Here ya go, come with me.” 

You protest fervently “Noooooo! I wanna stay!” You start to run away but you feel him scoop you up and walk with you. 

You then get placed into the back of a cab, with Matt shuffling in next to you. 

That’s when you start to cry like a baby. “Noooo I don’t wanna go home! Josie and I were having fun!” 

“You and Josie weren’t having as much fun as you though, Fordham, seeing as she called me to get you out of there.” 

“Well why do you care, aren’t you supposed to be on…petrols right now?”

“Its PA-trols, Fordham, and I’m taking a day off” 

“Nuh uh uh! Youuuuu said you don’t take days off! Someone could get hurt you said.” 

“Yeah and you would’ve gotten hurt if I hadn’t taken a day off.” 

“I’m literally fiiiiiiine!” That isn’t true but at least you can still lie in this state. 

The car ride is filled with tears and whining until you fall asleep on Matt’s shoulder. You woke up for a split second to catch a glimpse of him kissing your forehead and jumping out your bedroom window to go fight crime. 

————————————————-

August 28th, 10:40 pm

The few days after the drunken incident are completely Matt free. At least, Matt isn’t in the room, but he’s still in your mind.

You’re cooking yourself pasta one night when you hear to noise. You haven’t heard it since the night you hurt your knee. 

You turn off the burner and grab the frying pan, just in case. Once you make your way into the bedroom however, you notice that nobody is in the room and on the windowsill is just a little note.

Fordham, meet me at the garden outside of your building.

MM

This could be a trap, but you doubt any bad guys know The Devil of Hell’s Kitchen’s initials or that he calls you the name of your school, so you decide to take the chance.

————————————————

Sneaking in through the garden gate, you see Matt sitting on a bench surrounded by two pillars covered in Mandevilla.  

“How did you know about this place, I’ve never been here before.” You ask Matt.

���I would smell the Mandevilla on my way to your apartment. Reminds me of you.” He smiles in your general direction. He knows your kryptonite too well.

“What do you want, Matt? I’m not gonna stand here discussing flowers with you. Do you have a point or no?” You cross your arms and impatiently tap your foot.

“You know you haven’t shown up to work in 3 days. I can legally fire you ya know.” He smirks at you. Fuck.

“Well after the disaster-fest that was the bar incident I thought it would be best if I made some distance.” You uncross your arms and stuff your hands in your pockets. It is now coming to your attention you came here wearing sweatpants. 

“I miss you Fordham.” 

You’re taken aback. “What?”

“I miss being with you! And I don’t want to risk your life but it’s killing me to not be with you so I was hoping, with your consent, we could go back to just one rule and see what happens.” He almost looks desperate

“No.” You respond quick. He doesn’t seem shocked. 

“I understand. That night you hurt your knee was horrible, i get that you don’t want to get hurt again-“

“No.” You say again, more firmly. “You don’t understand, I hate the rule. I hate the way things were. I went with it because I thought it was the only way we can exist but now I figured it out. I’m tired of keeping secrets to be with you. And you got one thing right, that night was horrible because that was the night you left, and the night I realized that Goddammit Matt Murdock I’M IN LOVE WITH YOU!” 

You scream the last part with all the weight in your chest. It’s quiet for a moment before you continue.

“Ain’t that just the worst thing you’ve ever heard.”

You see Matt look up at your general area. He’s grinning like the devil that he is. He stands up and walks towards you, and you know what’s about to happen, and you want it so bad.

Just like the first kiss that hot night in July, this kiss is soft and sweet at first but delves into a passionate act of love. And just like the first kiss, it leads to more. Right there on the garden bench, sealing your fates. 

It’s beautiful and explosive and loving and you know that tomorrow you’ll have to actually lay down the ground rules of this relationship, but for now the two of you just lay there, enjoying each other’s company on the garden bench.

“So.. i take it you love me too?” You ask, out of breath.

Matt laughs “Fordham, I love you so much I can’t even describe it.” 

You snuggle in closer “Perfect.” 

[autisticbokutoenthusiast]

ep 8 stray thoughts

- oh my baby is ok oh this has been a terrifying 12 hours

- help nuth and phop sitting down with nont in a “hey buddy, you doing ok?” formation.

- “sorry for tracking you down and holding you at gunpoint, i’ve kinda been going through it” nont my baby…

- i knew mister pup mask wasn’t nuth what i mf say!!!!

- interesting how the camera filming nuth film nant is shaky- almost like it is also a recording

- kudos to the actor cause nant and nont really are two different ppl

- SCREAM is this the same blade nuth used to shave phop?!?!?!?!!??!!?!?!

- this is kinda crazy?!??! like the shaky recording is making me feel like i’m losing my mind

- we’re nant and nont close at all? like i assume not because it seemed like a lot of what nont knew about his brother came from hacking his phone but also this whole revenge quest is a lot for someone you weren’t close to… or maybe it’s the idea of nant? idk

- it’s the red lighting again…

- i know we’re not seeing the recording so i wonder what they can see… maybe just the feet

- the shot going blurry…. oh….. and the choir vocals

- I WHAT???!!? my emotions are all over the place and then they hit me with captain advertising sex ekdkrkekdkjdj. “sex helps you become the chosen one” ok horny darth vader damn

- OH I KNOW THAT IS NOT A VIDEO RECORDER. what the hell… oh captains despicable ass just got worst…

- i love the little sound effects for the baddie bunch, also captain needs to stop annoying ppl that could floor him like dude leave zouey and teena alone

- hold on zouey before being so uncomfortable with being touched to now smiling… oh i need a minute

- oh he did have a connection with nant, oh poor nont… hold what do you mean prom thinks nant is still alive

- nuths place has a lot of flowers doesn’t it

- nuth and phop continue to be my beloveds NUTH MY BABY I LOVE HIS LITTLE LAUGJ (also nuth being in his mid thirties i thought he was in his twenties…

- phop saying “what if it wasn’t me. you could have met a scammer” like babe didn’t you block him once he bought you a new laptop 🤨. water under the bridge i guess

- “its not easy to find a partner for gays who are older” nuth is dramatic as hell you’re in your thirties?!?!?! oh maybe he was talking about its because he doesn’t like parties… in which case yeah yeah it is

- i may be an american but i don’t think this is how you play rugby…

- oh shit nuth is tall HOLD ON I FORGOT THEY WERE IN CONTACT

- first my baby boy… i’m not gonna say a single thing about the mustache actually whatever makes you happy boo

- “yes chef” (pathetic) (horny) (regretful)

- hold on if first is the chef why didn’t he cook it himself…. ya know what whatever makes them happy

- oh first my baby boy

- why did i have a physical reaction the word powerless being on my screen the same time as aob… his character has so many layers i need to peel them all immediately

- keen… i can’t even put this into words but he’s so sweet

- i forgot first is a student like i’ve not seen this boy with a single book. also i don’t like the fact he left his phone like that… HUH welp.

- firsts dad looking at him like “there is something wrong with this boy” wkjdjjejd

- do you want to get chicken noodles ?!??!??!?!?!?!?!?

- nont going from i’m ready to kill to find my brother to idk anymore… he’s going to spiral tremendously isn’t he

- is captain just eating bread sandwaivh… i need answers

- there’s a statically tv behind nont and prom again. also nonts bangs are down but they were parted with the baddie bunch..

- keen and the pup mask?!?!

[iwannaban0nym0us]

welp time for another one of those long rambley posts because well uh everything's fucking ending

fuckkkkkkkkkkk why does this have to hurt so bad

I tried so hard to avoid this, fuck, why am I back here

It hurts different this time but it still hurts, while i'm glad we didn't stretch this out over months fuck I was in love

oh btw i have no brain power rn so this is probably gonna be entirely incoherent and just whatever the fuck comes to my mind

so uh basically my girlfriend broke up with me and at lunch today, and like it wasn't a bad breakup and i'm really glad we talked because like i wanted to talk about how things have felt kinda off lately, and uh it turns it its because they now only have platonic feelings for me

i think like part of me knew this was coming, they broke up with their last boyfriend this time last year (because they realized they really just wanted to be friends w/ him) and this time last year is when i hit the point of no return w/ my ex and a bunch of things that happened then have happened now (soccer team disbanding partner/ex not going on the school trip)

and so like i've had the thought 'could i go back to just being friends with them' or 'should i just break up with them before they have the chance to hurt me like my ex did' spiral around in my head a bit but i never actually did because like they're amazing

but then there's the part of me the would dream of us lasting for years and was just so fucking happy w/ them and was about to tell them i loved them, i've been thinking it for months but i thought i was ready to say it to them,,, and then well,,,,

theres so many nevers now, like i never said i love you, they never came to one of my club soccer games, i never went to one of their vaulting comps, we nEVER WENT ON A DATE

fuck i wish i had gone to prom w/ them this year, skipped the soccer game that didn't end up actually happened and fucking dealt w/ the fact that my ex was there but i was too fucking scared to do either of those things

aaaaa i was trying so so so fucking hard not to let myself get hurt by a partner again, i waited a while to ask them out like i was certain i really like them and they liked me back, and then i took things very slow, we took a while to kiss, we never said i love you, i tried really really hard to test the waters and really make sure i could trust them before i fully committed my heart to them

and while i can trust them and they are an amazing person who still cares a lot about me, they still managed to hurt me because they don't love me the same way i love them, and i kinda thought they did, and maybe they did for a bit, but they don't anymore

ahahaha fuck this afternoon they added the song (redacted) by Leanna Firestone to their playlist,,,, hhhhhh,,,, just look at the lyrics,,,, it made me start crying again,,,,

ok well uh i think im gonna fall asleep sitting on my floor in the dark w/ my laptop on my lap so i guess i should probably stop here and go cry myself to sleep

if i have any time tomorrow this'll probably be expanded because uh my soccer team is also ending :D so i'm losing people i've played w/ for 5+ years and also i'm gonna have to come out to a new soccer team which is gonna just so great

[orionthecritter]

WELP! I OFFICIALLY NEED TO GET A NEW TABLET!

Half joking here, but I have awful news. The connector that I use for my cord to plug into my laptop is officially broken, I will either need to get it fixed, find a new one, or just give up on my current tablet and find a different one. First, I don't have money, I'm broke as a rock, second, I have absolutely no fucking idea on where to find a connector thats the exact same for my cord, and same thing as last, no money! And a new drawing tablet, we can guess why I can't get one. I have no clue what to do! And considering I was working on a comic for one of my askblogs, I'm most definitely, screwed. So for now, my art is either gonna be on paper or I'm not gonna post anything at all, which sucks! Cause I love showing my art to people! I'm not gonna draw on my phone due to me losing motivation quite quickly and never finishing anything, not even quick sketches! God I have no clue what to do, sorry for the rant, but I'm just stressed out at the moment! But to make the situation better, I made a quick phone doodle of myself and how I reacted in the moment.

Nother quick rant here, I've been thinking about getting a new laptop too, due to it just bugging out and crashing all the time, I'm trying to see if I can get one of my old aunties or grandmas laptops, so thankfully thats possible, although I'm not gonna get my hopes up, the laptops they both used to have are hella old, but I'm honestly praying they'll work. Anyways, if you made it this far, then thank you for reading my long rant! Everything's been a bit much but I'm gonna try my best to figure out on how to get it fixed! Hope you have good afternoon, good evening, and goodnight.

[vortship]

🔮

I'll let you pick who gets to see it. 👁 @the-haunted-office

Send 🔮 and I will write a drabble of a memory that your muse gets to see into.

Hal wasn't exactly a dress-wearer.

Her academy uniform aside, being adorned in fabric of any kind of expense or fanciness had a certain novelty factor to it. If it's what the heist required, she supposed. In this case, top secret files on some new super-ship only governor Julip Litch was allowed to see. From his personal laptop.

Easy enough.

She was able to get herself on the guest list under an alias she realized now she didn't remember, standing at the gate with her hands jammed in the pockets of her dress; teal and cut just above the ankles with an embroidered circuit pattern cascading up from the bottom seam. It even came with custom arm décor, Vortian-style as ever.

Hoards of important looking Vortians gathered, a sea of expensive cyber-enhancements as far as the eye could see, typical of those higher class on her planet. They chatted about things she didn't understand or care about as she made her way in, a broad, sharp-toothed grin hitting her face as soon as she realized just how much free food she was in for.

"I can't recall us inviting such a mischievous creature."

From behind her, the voice of a young woman spoke, a short glimmering dress, horns adorned in gold cuffs. She folded her arms across her chest as she regarded Hal, who looked up at her, bewildered.

"Yeah? And I can't recall asking you for your-"

"Halinor Nima." she spoke her name like a swear, "Don't pretend like everyone doesn't know who you are, girl. Eni told me she saw you."

...stupid, idiot Eni. She would be here.

Time to recoup. And by that she meant flee from the slowly approaching guards who'd been observing the entire scene. She glanced around, prepared to dodge between them, to get out of there and return at a later time. Ugh, she knew she should have gone the sneakier route instead of trying to pass herself off as one of these snobby, low-tech, shoelaces.

"Miki, stop. I invited her."

From the corner of her eye, another figure approached, a girl she recognized. The pride of Region 9 Academy, dressed all in white and gold. She'd never spoken to her, or acknowledged her in any way at school. As far as Hal knew her only friend was that slippery Eni.

"You invited her?" the young woman, 'Miki' challenged, "And I'm guessing Dad knows this trouble-maker is here?"

"Not anymore than he knows how you're texting that low-tech Prux Bentley right in front of your fiance." the girl said flatly, blank expression turning to a glare.

"What!? You- how did you even-?" Miki protested in vain, then sighed, "Fine. Whatever. I don't know what your problem is, Niri, but if that... girl causes any trouble it's gonna be your head. Not mine."

Hal took the opportunity to stick her tongue out and blow a raspberry as the young woman stomped away, muttering to herself. She then turned back to her unlikely savior, the girl in white, Miss Perfect herself.

"Niri Litch." the girl introduced after a brief pause,

"Yeah. I know." Hal let out a bitter laugh, "Top of the class since like, primary. I just didn't know you were hardcore like that."

Niri responded to the teasing with just the slightest hint of a smile before shaking her gold-clad, horned, head.

"Well, we've never actually met so... I just figured..." she trailed off, suddenly seeming nervous, "That was my sister, Miki. She's got her socialite pants on today I guess."

"Ha! Socialite pants! That's funny." Hal offered her a much-too-hard pat on the back, resulting in an audible 'Oof' from her companion.

"I know what people say but... I always found you to be- interesting. You're funny sometimes in class, you say stuff I don't think most people have the courage to-"

"Welp! You know! I just say what comes to my-" Hal interrupted, before something seemed to catch her attention in the distance, "Oho! Guys with trays of stuff! Lets get some! Oh and thanks... probably should have said that before but-"

"Don't worry about it. Let's- do that."

[arabellaflynn]

Brief life update: Landlord problem sorted (for now, at least). My support system is awesome. I believe you have all been contacted about repayment, but if I missed anybody, let me know.

I have not bothered to tell my roommates this. I hope they are experiencing unbearable amounts of stress. The Useless Narcissist did eventually cough up his share, but the (Probably Soon-To-Be-Ex-)Wife has given me nothing yet. They can stew.

One of the NPOs I work with threw a birthday party for a friend of a board member back in February. I ran it for them, as I often do. I'm good at being an attractive, friendly person who knows where all the extra chairs are. 

I rather like running these parties. They're full of interesting people that I will almost definitely never see again, so it doesn't much matter what I say to them. The birthday girl was 80, and a semi-retired "spiritual counselor" -- apparently, she was where the priests and rabbis and imams went when they needed to talk through their problems. She described herself as "spiritual krill", which amused me greatly. A bunch of her kids were there, and a grandson who was probably on the spectrum and could not stop talking about airplanes, and a musical theater actor from Manhattan who complained that Cambridge was not drinking hard enough at 2 pm on a Sunday, and a variety of other artists that told as many weird stories as there are feathers on an Amazonian parrot. Her Moroccan cleaning lady made a secondhand appearance by sending a half-sheet cake topped with blue frosting and chocolate-covered strawberries. They told me I should be eating their cake and drinking their wine with them, so I did.

One of the nice things about working in the arts is that if you can still do your job well with a glass of wine in your hand, nobody cares.

The board member who threw the party apparently thought I was great fun, because he got the coordinator to give him my email address so he could ask me where to send a thank you card. Which card, when it arrived, had a $100 check in it. Welp. I was paid to run the party in the first place, mind, but being an attractive friendly person who knows where the chairs are only gets you about $18-20 an hour. 

I've never been told I can't take tips, but I've never asked either -- this one was the biggest I've gotten, but it's not the first. One of the more memorable ones was when I was working box office for a show where a gaggle of kids had come up from New York to perform with Boston locals. One set of parents had failed to buy their tickets before driving up from NYC, and the show sold out. The ticketing software didn't have any way to start a waitlist for shows with late seating, but there are always people who don't turn up, and even if by some miracle everyone made it (they didn't) that theater had bench seating and I was not paid enough to care if they were two people over fire code, so I told the parents to come back in 45 minutes, and told the manager that one couple had to duck out but would be back at intermission. I had no way to sell them a ticket and was fully prepared to sneak them in for free, but the wife did everything short of stomp her husband's foot and hiss, "honey, bribe the usher." He gave me a $20.

The bigger news, though, is a gig I've landed for mid-May. I got an email a couple months ago from one of the orgs I do livestreaming for asking if I could run sound for one of their shows. They had correctly guessed that I knew how to do this, but only because they don't understand the difference between running digital sound for a webinar/class and operating the 32-track analog behemoth they have up in their tech booth -- none of them are in any way technical, that's why they call me. I didn't expect a lot of help from the venue, but I ended up running the pre-show music off my phone, and the board off a random laptop using VLC, which is, uh... let's go with, not industry standard. 

I thought my performance was adequate. Like, the show did happen, more or less as planned. The lighting designer apparently thought I did so well she specifically requested that I run sound for the next, much bigger show she was lighting at that venue. I am, apparently, "the best". I have learned to just say thank you and shut up when people say these things, because it's rude to argue with others over their own subjective opinions, but if that was "the best" I really have to wonder, what kind of unrepentant fuckups had she been saddled with before I came along? 

Anyway, the much bigger show thought I was a perfectly reasonable choice(!!?!?!?!!?!), so I'm now signed on for that. I refuse to half-ass this anymore; if they're going to pay me sound tech rates, I'm actually going to be a sound tech, and do this correctly. Industry standard for this stuff is a piece of software called QLab, which is only available for Mac, and has rental licenses for a totally reasonable $5/day. I am not okay running $1500 of show off a computer that dies if you trip over the power cord, so the battle-scarred MacBook I inherited from a previous roommate has gone back to Apple for a spa weekend and a battery replacement, a surprise expense which I am only able to cover because the same superhero support network has indicated they do not need their loan money back in a hurry. So thank you for that as well! I have about a month to teach myself how to work QLab for real.

I've spent Easter feeding junk food to rats and trying to wrap my brain around the idea that someone thinks it's "totally reasonable" to pay me $50/hr to sit up in the booth and periodically click a large button marked GO. I have to keep reminding myself that all the tech stuff only seems straightforward to me because I have been mucking around with it since I was ten. I had a look at the service manual for the mixer before I tried working it the first time, and at one point it literally says, "This will make more sense if you look at the block diagram," so I suspect a large portion of that hourly rate is there just because this is terrifyingly complicated to other people.

[For the uninitiated, a block diagram is a simplified line drawing depicting the components and connections of an electrical circuit. For something like the mixing board I was dealing with, it's usually close to, but not identical to, the actual schematics. My father has designed custom circuit boards for a living since before I was born, so I'm well familiar with the things. But if you're not I suppose they look a bit like a Mondrian take on the Nazca lines. I probably couldn't troubleshoot a broken mixing deck from the diagram in the back of the manual, but I can follow it well enough to see where all the inputs and outputs are going.]

Still no grant money, not that I expected it to land on Easter. The waiting is the worst. A lot of my problem right now is that I need to raise my freelance rates for a lot of things, but until I get that cushion in place I can't risk losing any of the clients I currently have. Some money is better than no money, but some money is not necessarily enough money, which is the fundamental problem.

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[chameleon-on-lsd]

Tatort Zürich liveblogging E1 + E2

so I watched Von Affen und Menschen (shoutout to Severin, the current director of the zoo that was there to say 3 words <3) and am now 30 mins into Züri brännt. some things: it's so funny to recognize places and then also be like 'how did they get from THERE to THERE in 2 seconds' (like some of the bike delivery guys path was insane) i like noah. no surprise there I skipped SO many of the abduction scenes. idk if it's the swiss german or that actor in particular but my god, the cringe. "can you knock??" is apparently just a Tatort running gag "du schlafsch? ohni mich?" iconic also all the fucking un-subbed french. I know we have that in school and most of it is also get-able with context clues. but also some is just SO fast. noah and his stupid lil phone lanyard <3 what the fuck is going on with the brother and the weird ass halloucinations of his sister oh girlie tried to off herself with a gun? oh boy noah, that is an ugly ass green/orange tie they're really going for a fucking horror vibe for a police procedual huh he has nice high-german though lmao singing mani matter how swiss you wanna be? yes. we had to sing that shit in primary school lmao (I'm also not really paying HOLY FUK SHOWING THE FULL SUICIDE OF POLICE CHIEF GUY? MY FUCKING GOD but also means that grandjean is not his successor xD

E2: ah, another man xD what a surprise that the swiss tv show has an episode called Schöggiläbe lol now frenchie is singing let Hörk sing! xD (do not) lmao the chocolate fountain WHY DID YOU PUT YOUR FULL TONGUE IN IT. WHAT THE FUCK. this is why I find the huge choco fountain at the Lindt House of chocolate so disgusting what the FUCK is this 4th wall break'????? ew??? now what dark past does mr. 'jugo mit 2 sterne' chef have I keep forgetting that she has a son ......why the 4th wall stufffffff. stop talking to me directly lmao what the fuck was that song???? the Drogehandel one lmao the grandma's introduction as 'vorgängerin und.. nachfolgerin' "die familie isch so abgfuckt!" lmao preach girlie lmao does her laptop have the company logo on the back? that's not how laptop branding works noah my baby <333 "ih de best uflösig bitte. was, nöd mal 2k??" xD also is that a KNITTED TIE? what the fuck my guy (also just learned that is surname is Löwenherz. bless) ?? subplot? random people secretely hidden in random cellar? HARDBRÜCKE! xD wHAT is this conversation xD with the hungarian also, a snazzy shirt from mrs Staatsahwältin what a moustache from the Vermieter xD also I love the random police men they have with them sometimes. and my god the hungarian guy is cute and tall, jesus ohh the neighbour is the lady that hid the other ones away oooooh you're a rent boy (did we know that?) the fucking 80s hair of the daughter is so weird xD they really googled "business graphs" and pulled up the first result xD burning a testament? classy damn, also NOOOO stop the 4th wall bullshit but also lmao at her knocking back shots "20 kleine mohammeds" my guy XDD I like his jacket with the little bird on it welp, he also has kiddos I guess OH, she signed her Kündigung lmao, is she doing VR drunk?? oh no, next day xD noah is so adorable "langsam, susch chunts zmorge wieder ufe" lmao girlie pops is not doing great xD FRENCHIE WITH THE ACTION ROLL!!! ...did tessa not have to do ANY shooting training or certification?? at least things like 'c'est quoi ton problem' are easy to understand xD also, putain lol god the fucking iPhone ring tone xD ??????????????? WHY DID YOU KICK OFF THE MIRROR OF A PARKED CAR? YOU'RE A POLICE OFFICER xD wait, what is her job title? oh, right, she's Fallanalytikerin. but like... maybe don't commit crimes WHAT THE FUCK. grandma is actually mom? ohhhh yeah, so she's the sister of the dead guy and not the daugther oh god tessa, do we need to see you hook up? he's kinda cute at least JESUS fingerbanging her on the dance floor??? whew boy JESUS salfkfaklfasdlaskjd ??????????? should we know the old guy'????? that wasn't charlie right?? idk the hair looked wrong. but she's back there now I guess thank you hot police guy for bringing charlie to frenchie oh hey, the lady and child are still here what the fuck is that outfit mrs staatsanwältin "kei chance sorry, ich schwör" xD you can do it girl. also hurrrrr uniformed guy the brother that got money from the chocolate guy shot him? rent boy guy is adorable in that cableknit sweater d'awwww he's so cute oohh, honor killing ....did she say Schwulenhass so she didn't have to tell the woman that her brother/dad used rent boys? is that the Stadionbrache? I feel like they also dumped the last guy in the car there xD welp heart attack incoming for old mrs matriarch and the young one is such a cold ass bitch xD you'd think she's be sweeter being in the chocolate business~ god, that they almost end both episodes with a suicide d'awww just tossing the money, bless JESUS. just actually shouted NO (at him holding the gun against his head) that was a shot in the shoulder. he'll be fine. see. you did okay tessa oooooh contract killer. I guess. awww Milan. (my love for curly haired scruffy men persists) sadlkasjfklasjl "Ich cha das nöd ohni dich. du blibsch" The ship does sail itself. Because she just made out with a guy who wants to keep her in Zurich but looks happier that her colleague (Ott. Not Tessa. sure honey) wants her to stay.

[darkicedragon]

Local area was chilly, but work area had ice/snow! >8ooo -- 'That's weird. I thought I turned my laptop on but my monitor hadn't lit up yet.'

*peeks at laptop*

[Updating: 5%]

Noooooooooooooooooo! 😱

I DON'T LIKE WIN11. PUT IT BAAAAACKKKKK. -- Older Team Leader is now off on annual leave, so we'll see how New Team Leader handles things from here, pfft. -- I KEEP LOOKING IN THE WRONG PLACE ON THE TASKBAR.

(╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻ -- Less than an hour in, main software goes down again. :) :) :) -- 'I'll update the laptop while I do the mail run so it'll be done by the time I get back.'

*gets back*

[Pls update and restart laptop]

'I. I just did….' -- Coworkers have left the office.

I can turn the radio off, yesssssss. ^-^ -- On the way home: ^-^

o-o

Did I turn off the lights.

Welp, I guess I'll find out tomorrow.

[brainfilehasstoppedworking]

Shit, my laptop is glitching like hell. Guess I ain't gonna have it for a while, now. Thank God it's Thanksgiving break next week and I don't need it! But what sucks is that I was planning on playing Danganronpa V2 with my friend. Shit, man. Of all times, too.

My dad is planning on getting it to my uncle, see if he can help. I really hope he can. I mean, I really need it and I don't look forward to having to deal with my mom being pissed at me more than before. God hates me. And it's always with technical issues, too. All my problems are of technology usually.

Jesus fuck. Welp. I guess I'll deal with it for the moment. I just hope I don't lose all my stuff, because there's a lot of art and shit on there that I really wanted to keep.