#when they align w things i genuinely want / like to do bc then… i’ll be more vulnerable to her? we’ll have a reason to bond? idk. i don’t t

[pepprs]

elton johns music is so fucking beautiful and heart wrenching and it makes me want to cry and i hate that i can’t like allow myself to emote to his music normally because if i cried over elton john then my mom would win. and so many things in my life are like if i x then my mom would win and i can’t do that. Lol

[shotorozu]

hii!!! i have a lil request! its smth ive been thinking a lot about bc i love him so much, but how do u think shoto would be with someone whos like super counter-culture? like super goth or punk or gyaru or smth! im personally really into goth and have lots of facial piercings including some that are not super common like angel fangs as well as a bunch of tattoos, brightly dyed hair and dress kinda trad goth on the regular w bones and all that.

i can kinda see him maybe catching interest in someone whos so outside of the norm in style as a way to kinda fuck w his dad since he grew up so traditionally and all that, but also he seems like he'd be too kind to actually follow through with dating someone solely to spite his dad.

skfbdidjd idk! i just kinda wanna hear other ppls thoughts on it! i hope u have a good holiday season and a good new year!

(gender neutral reader, no pronouns mentioned— i tried to be very broad when it came to describing aspects of aesthetics)

ohh i think shouto being with someone that’s super counter culture is an interesting concept

before meeting them, he’d probably walk past them— his future s/o decked out in super cool accessories (including piercings), tattoos and dyed hair, and his neck would almost SNAP due to how fast he looked back at them 😭😭

it’s a culture shock, he obviously isn’t used to people that are so.. non-traditional? if he brought you in front of his dad then his dad would probably freeze up (ironically) and get sent to the hospital in an ambulance.

he’d be in awe just by looking at them standing, breathing, doing nothing— the wrist guards (solely for aesthetics, a shock for shouto since he needs those in the heroics) leg warmers, colorful hairpins, intricate and one of the kind hairstyles—

your overall fashion sense has him gawking.

it’s almost rude (and is about to become that way) the way he’s just opening staring at you like some kid on an airplane— but y’know, he’s kinda cute so you don’t make much of it. on top of that, you should probably mind your business, and not start some beef with the current #1 hero’s youngest and also famous son.

when he gets to know you more, he finds himself liking you— whether or not your personality aligns perfectly with your chosen aesthetic, or it’s the polar opposite, he finds himself sticking to you like some lost puppy.

it’s a perfect 50:50 of “i think your personality is cool” and “i need to follow you because i need to look at you more. you LOOK cool”

so he dates you for the reasons above and also because he wants to piss off his dad— because again, looking at you could send endeavor into a shock. (and he dates you genuinely because he actually really likes you and wouldn’t use you without your consent just to spite his very traditional father)

all backstory aside, he goes to you when he needs advice to level up his appearance— that includes fashion. anything you say is noteworthy, and he will absolutely take any advice as long as you say it.

he also comes to you for advice for piercings especially.

yeah, because y’know how it looked like he had some cartilage piercings in some of the latest official arts? he definitely went to you to ask for the pain level and aftercare.

“will it hurt?”

“yeah.. it’s cartilage after all. what if you got a lobe piercing first? you don’t have one.”

“i trust you. :)) so i’ll get one if you say so.”

he would’ve made you pierce his ears— or he did make you. it depends on how okay, and experienced you are with it. (and even if you weren’t— he’d still want you to do it 💀 it’s a good thing you could say no)

he’d also want to know the backstory behind any of your tattoos if you have any.

and he’d also want to try everything with you— that includes touching up your hair dye, getting new clothes, painting your nails, doing your makeup— the endless amount of things he’s willing to do with you, and assist you with 😭 i need someone like that

anyways, besides everything fashionable— he is your number one defender.

someone (for some stupid reason) said out loud “when i think of todoroki, i can’t imagine him being with someone like Y/N..”

and before anyone could say anything else, he just blankly replies with

“when i think of you, i can’t imagine you with anyone.”

that causes everybody to shut up, and you have to bite the inside of your cheek to prevent yourself from breaking into a smile.

he’s ruthless sometimes 😭

[lamortexiii]

Cryptic Mystic: What’s Your Sign?

Many of us are fascinated by astrology and all things outer space related. The great unknown that is beyond the stars has been a hot topic for centuries. But, how did the zodiac begin? What makes astrological signs and the alignment of planets and stars so magical? Is it truly prophetic? Does your sign define your personality, past, present, and future? Or is this simply another product of the Barnum Effect?

So I’ll start by asking the obvious: “what’s your sign?” I’m a Leo through and through. While I’m skeptical about the claims of some astrological signs and their relation to my life on a daily basis, I do believe there is some truth here - as is with most things. This topic is one that I have been wanting to write about for some time now. I have always found outer space, stars, planets, etc. to be fascinating. As a child, I remember laying in the grass and watching the stars above me. In my little valley in the forest, I could see so many stars that wouldn’t be visible if I were in the city. I am so thankful I had that childhood experience of growing up somewhere where I could truly connect with nature and the simple things around me that most take for granted on a day-to-day basis. I still stargaze to this day, but I can’t see near as many as I once did in my childhood forest valley home. I’ve seen a plethora of shooting stars throughout my lifetime, two meteor showers, two solar eclipses, and plenty of unidentified objects that were likely satellites… or were they…?

One time when I was driving home from work late one night I saw something that befuddled me. As I drove down the winding 2 lane highway in the darkness of the night I saw what appeared to be a helicopter hovering right above the trees. Now, this area I was driving through was rural. There are few houses in those woods, but there are some. The backroads leading to the site where the “helicopter” was hovering are seldom traveled, especially this late at night. I began processing the event in my mind and questioning if it was a helicopter, why would it be hovering so low and what exactly would it be doing in the middle of nowhere in the middle of the night. It just didn’t make sense. I thought about logical explanations and could only come up with one. There is the slim possibility that someone driving on one of the many backroads in that area may have got into an accident and was getting airlifted to a hospital. I’ve seen it happen before on backroads near there. Aside from this idea, I had nothing. By this point, I had obviously slowed down so I could get a better look. Hell, there wasn’t any traffic so it’s not like I was worried about causing an accident or anything. As I looked closer I noticed it wasn’t a helicopter at all. There were about 4-6 large bright lights shining down below the area that the craft was hovering over. The circumference of this craft was much wider than a helicopter - more circular. The lights were far too big and far too bright. Whether it was fear, shock, tiredness, or my stomach growling, I continued to drive on and leave the peculiar scene behind. Now, I know this has nothing to do with astrology or zodiac signs, but it is an interesting story nonetheless. 

In reference to zodiac signs, I find that descriptions of a Leo with my particular birthdate are genuinely pretty accurate when describing my personality and conflicts. However, the daily horoscopes are definitely not accurate in my experience. I will say that when I read/listen to them I try to apply something positive from the reading to my daily life. I engage in a deeper thought process and practice mindfulness throughout the day, keeping that positive focus within my mind on the positive message I am supposed to be implementing into my day. I have also found that compatibility readings have been somewhat inaccurate as far as certain zodiac signs getting along or not getting along with other zodiac signs. The biggest obvious red flag for me is how many different sources there are. And guess what? They all say something different on the daily. If zodiac signs and horoscopes are supposed to be accurate, then why don’t all individuals who report them online all say the same thing - or at least something similar?? To play devil's advocate here, I did say earlier that I believe there is some truth to all of this, which is why it interests me so much and also why I believe in this stuff to a degree. There is a lot of magical and wondrous history to unpack in regards to the zodiac and horoscopes. So, let’s jump right in, shall we?

Interesting fact: the word zodiac is derived from Greek terminology meaning “circle of little animals.” We’re a circle of little animals - cute visuals there, eh? Hieroglyphs in Egypt dating as early as the 14th century BC were found to contain a circle of decans (constellations) depicting something that looks a lot like the constellations and zodiac symbols that we know today. In total there were 36 decans found within the temple.

During the first half of the first millennium, Babylonian astronomers created our modern zodiac. They also mapped the previous constellations that were seen in the Egyptian hieroglyphs but continued to add more as they were discovered. In the last half of the 5th century, the Babylonian astronomers divided the many constellations into 12 equal "signs” to represent the 12 months of the year at 30 days per month. Each sign contained 30° of celestial longitude, thus creating the first known celestial coordinate system. According to calculations by modern astrophysics, the zodiac was introduced between 409 and 398 BC and probably within a very few years of 401 BC. Unlike modern astrologers, who place the beginning of the sign of Aries at the place of the Sun at the vernal equinox, Babylonian astronomers fixed the zodiac in relation to stars, placing the beginning of Cancer at the "Rear Twin Star" (β Geminorum) and the beginning of Aquarius at the "Rear Star of the Goat-Fish" (δ Capricorni). Due to the precession of the equinoxes, the time of year the Sun is in a given constellation has changed since Babylonian times, the point of vernal equinox has moved from Aries into Pisces. 

You’ll be pleasantly surprised, intrigued, or disgusted to know that all of this does have some roots within religion. The Hebrew Bible shows knowledge of the Babylonian zodiac. E. W. Bullinger noted that the drawings found in the book of Ezekiel were quite similar to the middle four quarters of the zodiac (Lion/Leo, Bull/Taurus, Man/Aquarius, Eagle/Scorpio). You read that right, Scorpio is noted as being an eagle - not a scorpion. Some say that the twelve tribes of Israel are correlated with the zodiac signs found within the Hebrew 12 month calendar. There is an argument that the position of the Israelic tribes around the Tabernacle from the book of Numbers correlates with the exact order of the zodiac, with Judah, Reuben, Ephraim, and Dan representing the middle signs of Leo, Aquarius, Taurus, and Scorpio, respectively. It is shocking how I have heard religious people in modern times talk about how this is all a bunch of garbage, even though some of this is literally correlated with items from the Bible.

To explain daily horoscopes and the connection between the stars, planets, and our zodiac signs, you must engage in a bit of math (yuck). When planets and constellations of the zodiac would align, the Babylonian astronomers of that time would note the experiences that people had and found similarities. These experiences, along with the position of the Earth, Sun, Moon, and constellations and the positions relative to the zodiac signs were stored within a catalogue. This went on for several years and is essentially what began our modern-day daily horoscope. However, it is my personal opinion that a lot of these “professionals” who have their own magical websites where you can get a free daily horoscope, just make shit up to sound interesting. That is obvious by the previously mentioned differentials found within each page. I encourage you to do a quick Google search and you’ll see what I’m talking about. This ties into the belief that the Barnum Effect is in play here. You’ll remember the Barnum Effect from last month's blog. If you haven’t read the June 2021 blog The Imaginarium of Barnum, I suggest you head there next to get a deeper understanding of what I’m talking about before you continue reading. Much of what is broadcasted in daily horoscopes, zodiac sign descriptions, and even within mediumship and tarot readings is full of extremely vague generalities. Because the information is presented in such a vague and generalized way, it then becomes an instance where anyone could apply any of the information to their life in some way. So as you can see, there is some psychological manipulation at play here. Now, I am not saying this is true for all who present the information. I will say that there are A LOT of shams out there. I have seen far more fake sites/readings/etc. than I have seen legit ones. If I had to give a percentage from my personal experience, I’d say about 85% of what I’ve seen is bullshit. But you choose what you believe at the end of the day. I just ask you to keep an open mind and a wise eye about you when scanning the web for horoscopes, zodiac information, tarot, and mediumship. 

All of this information is interesting to stew on within your mind. I hope that you learned something new. I know I did when I was researching this topic for the blog. The religious ties were the most surprising thing to me. What did you find most interesting? Drop a comment under the blog on Tumblr or under the Instagram post for this month’s blog and let me know. Tonight if you are able, take a look at the stars and see if you can find the constellations. The plethora of shapes within the brightest stars are brilliant to gaze upon. Who knows, maybe you will find your zodiac constellation. Maybe you will depict a new constellation on your own by combining different combinations of stars. Or maybe you’ll see something that you can’t explain…

Cryptic Mystic Blog by PsychVVitch @psychvvitch

www.LaMorteXiii.com

[luobingmeis]

☕️ bakugou katsuki :)

[just as a general statement: i’m only at the start of season 4 !!!]

okay i LOVE bakugo like tbh i spent seasons 1 and 2 being like “oh my god i love him he’s such a shithead” but then once season 3 happened w/ the training camp and everything after i was like “oh..... OH..............” and also bc i think s3 is really when we start to see him.......... kinda reach out to his classmates? like i dont even remember the context or what he said but i remember early s3 thinking to myself “oh hey bakugo just..... gave his own form of motivation”

but like........ here is where bakugo GETS ME like, the fight he and deku had after the provisional licensing exam......... holy shit like 

1) of all things, i thought bakugo was going on the “i hate myself bc i was too weak and i got caught” route, which would’ve been heartbreaking in itself!!!! but instead we got “i hate myself bc i was too weak and i got caught and that in turn destroyed the hero i’ve admired my entire life and all might absolutely blames me” and that like. really got me tbh like i’ve always seen bakugo as a character whose pride will be his downfall and i think they really did it in such an interesting way bc bakugo truly blames himself for what happened to all might, even after all might assures him that he was going to lose his power anyway, and it just. makes me really sad, you know? bc yeah bakugo can be. aggressive. to say the least. but he’s still a kid, you know? and all might obviously cares for his students and he truly felt like he failed as bakugo’s teacher because bakugo was feeling so guilty and like. thinking back? i think we really do see that guilt? or at least the Effects of that guilt? and it makes me big sad :( not to mention the fact that, maybe it was just my interpretation, but the bakugo we see kidnapped by the LOV seemed to be scared, in his own way? like if im remembering correctly, he was like “you assholes won’t kill me, you want me for your league” but he was still Actually Thinking about his movements and what he was going to do? and during the fight with all for one, he actually admitted to himself that he was stuck? that he couldn’t get away from the LOV and therefore all might couldn’t fight to his full potential bc of the collateral damage? and just like to see bakugo Actually Accept that he’s in a bad situation + the guilt like........ oh boy

2) and also bakugo and deku’s actual fight was top tier holy shit like. the fact that deku was like “i’m not going to back down from this fight, not only am i the only one who understands what bakugo is going through and i know he needs to blow off some steam, but i’m also going to show him that he can’t push me around anymore” and bakugo like....... genuinely being upset that he beat deku? like i just keep thinking abt him asking all might why he chose deku to have one for all, especially bc bakugo then asks something along the lines of “but don’t you see that i’m weak now, too?” like.......... the fight was just so good and we saw how deku has progressed and made one for all his own quirk and also like. we almost see this tragic downfall-esque moment for bakugo? like bakugo’s fatal flaw is his pride and how he sees Any Type Of Help as a sign that he’s weak, and he finally felt this true moment of “everything i have done in my life has been wrong.” like, when he asks deku, “does this mean everything i’ve done to become just like all might has been wrong?” oh boy............. like i really want bakugo to learn that help =/= weakness, and even all might pointed it out that, while deku admires bakugo’s desire to win, bakugo “fears deku’s spirit” bc deku always acts with the intention to help others, and bakugo has always viewed that type of..... team work as a sign of weakness. i think it’s why he’s always going off on his own (like in the licensing exam), though hot take i wouldn’t be surprised if his penchant for doing his own thing is also tied to his guilt over what happened with all might

also though his friendship with kirishima???? top tier like tbh i love how kirishima seems to kinda see through bakugo and they really do seem to get each other :’)

i think my main thing with bakugo, and maybe this is a little too much heart-on-my-sleeve, but i kinda tend to have a bit of a soft spot for characters who are Angry A Lot like. maybe this sounds dumb but it’s very much this protective feeling of “ik what it’s like to be so consumed by anger that it sometimes feels like it’s the core of your personality and God do i want to see you heal” but i think that might be some projection on my end akjdsjkdjkds like i just get a bit sad bc bakugo, along with all the students, are Kids and the show doesn’t let you forget that they are Kids who always happen to be at the wrong place in the wrong time and it’s just like. i want him + all the characters to be able to heal

also tbh ik she’s only been seen like.......... twice but i have :/ thoughts :/ on bakugo’s mom and this is DEFINITELY projection but it really stood out to me how the way she described his quirk was “stupid awesome” in kinda a dismissive way and how she has that same aggressive behavior and. okay. that might have been for comedic effect like “ahahaha see how similar they are!!” like i get it and it also got a few chuckles out of me but also like. i am :/ bc parental figures play a Big Role in the show (such as deku’s love for his mom while all might essentially stands in as a father figure, todoroki having to actually address the hate he has towards his father [though i have hmm thoughts abt his situation with his mom too], and tbh i’ll even put iida with his older brother here bc of how much his goals align with making his brother/family proud) and it Really stands out to me how bakugo’s mom shares his anger/aggressive behavior but also seems to see him like. the rest of the world sees him. like while she did show care in being like “obviously i was worried about him, but when aizawa said that the LOV wouldn’t break his spirit, i knew he was in the right hands,” but i am overall very warily :/ at how similar they are, especially in a show that has already shown the depths of parental/guardian influence on its main cast of teenagers

and also there’s already been stuff said about how deku and bakugo eerily parallel all might and endeavor, right? like someone has already wrote a think-piece about that? bc with a show that actually has a very big commentary on breaking cycles of abuse (especially with todoroki), i am Big Eyes Emoji

(this isn’t to like. brush aside the mean things bakugo has done/said to deku and the other characters but like. i think it’s more than just “oh he’s just an asshole” like yeah he’s definitely abrasive and aggressive and jaded but it stems from this overwhelming sense of pride + a warped view of what it means to be a hero) (bc he really did only view being a hero as Winning and while that’s definitely a part of it, he ignored the more emotional side of it) (also don’t get me wrong his pride drives me up the wall a lot, especially thinking back to the sports festival, and again maybe this is me thinking too much or projecting, but it’s very obvious that he was heralded from the moment his quirk developed and that immediately made a recipe for disaster)

tldr: i love bakugo! a lot! he drives me up a wall but GOD get this kid some therapy <3

[flvcr]

— ( harry styles, twenty-five, cismale, he/him ) did you see ETIENNE FLUOR walking down main street earlier? you know who i’m talking about, they’re a POTTER / HOCKEY PLAYER. everybody in town says that they’re IDEALISTIC & INTUITIVE, but have a tendency to be UNPREDICTABLE & DESTRUCTIVE too. ETIENNE has been in town for THREE years. c'mon, they’re always requesting RUNNIN’ WITH THE DEVIL BY VAN HALEN at karaoke nights. well, i’m sure you’ll see them soon! @westmerestarters​

hiya! i am kt &+ underneath the read more is a LOT of info about my bb, etienne. ** insert clown emoji but make ‘em yee-haw ** if you’d like to plot you can reach me on here or at space cowboy#8536 on discord !! <33 v excited to interact with y’all and your bbs !!

𝖘𝖙𝖆𝖙𝖎𝖘𝖙𝖎𝖈𝖘

name: etienne ‘ marcel ‘ fluor. 

nicknames: goes by marcel, only allowing very few people to call him etienne.

gender / pronouns : cismale / he, him.

age: twenty-five.

birthday: june 27th.

zodiac: cancer !!

orientation: pansexual / panromantic.

occupation: hockey player ( currently injured ) // potter ( for fun ) !!

languages spoken: french, english & italian.

𝖎𝖓𝖘𝖕𝖎𝖗𝖆𝖙𝖎𝖔𝖓

- PINTEREST - featuring his wardrobe, his home, his aesthetic, some character inspo and olive, his german shepard pup !!

- SPOTIFY PLAYLIST - what he is currently listening to !!

personality type: INFJ-T / THE ADVOCATE

moral alignment: chaotic good

style-wise: etienne is v stylish, but isn’t overly flashy by any means. he’s intuitive in the sense of what works and what doesn’t. willing to explore the latest wardrobe craze, but also just likes what he likes and likely won’t venture out unless pressed by another to do so. post coming soon for his wardrobe !!! they say that the cancer man’s clothing is selected to reflect “ sophistication over flash “ but kdgjn i’ll let ya’ll be the judge of that. he’s v much harry inspired clothing wardrobe, but also tones it down with some casual looks, especially when it comes to getting his hands dirty in creative aspects !! but can be a bit on the flashier side as well, especially w/ hockey press and what not !!

𝖇𝖆𝖈𝖐𝖌𝖗𝖔𝖚𝖓𝖉

   etienne ‘ marcel ’ fluor was born in montpellier, france to two lovely parents, theodore and estelle fluor ( both born in england themselves ) . he is the youngest of his siblings, having one older brother and an older sister, all of them being roughly two years apart. at the age of eight, his family relocated to montreal, canada as a result of a promotion his mother received, which at such a young age, etienne had no qualms with, despite his siblings’ uneasiness.  upon moving to a new country at a young age, etienne truly found himself via escaping into various books and movies. often attempting to write his own and would force encourage his siblings to act his skits/plays out for his parents enjoyment. he continues to be very close with his parents and siblings - recently he taught his parents how to use facetime, so catch him face timing his family on sunday nights. 

   growing up, etienne also enjoyed playing all types of sports ( his parents signing him up hoping that he’d make friends as a result, which he did ). when it came down to it, athletic abilities-wise, there truly wasn’t anything that he wasn’t ‘ good ’ at, and that’s simply because he’s always been such a competitive individual / as well as a perfectionist. that competitive/perfectionist energy caused him to go home and practice a skill or trick for hours in order to be able to come back the next day and whoop everyone’s asses. overall, he’s very athletic, found alternating between various sports offered not only at school, but as well as through local clubs. ultimately, his love and appreciation for hockey swayed him and soon enough it became his sole focus. due to his perfectionist tendencies, etienne is very dedicated to his craft, he will spend hours practicing specific tricks and skills in order to be the best at what he does, which transcends past hockey and into, really, every aspect of his life. 

   throughout highschool ; etienne was a v dedicated student. although he’s a bit reckless and loved to goof off, he was always acing classes and applying himself. he genuinely cares for others, you could’ve seen his ass volunteering at a soup kitchen with his mom on sundays and what not, as well as take part in various clubs and sports ! just SOFT and sporty things. during this time, he joined the ontario hockey league and from there was eventually scouted out and recruited to the pittsburgh penguins as a defenseman at the age of eighteen - forgoing his parents desire for him to attend a university. although he enjoyed his time with pittsburgh, he was excited when the idea of being traded came up - eager to explore a new city and immerse himself in a new area. 

      trigger warning - injury, dislocation ( just in case !!!! ) however, he really didn’t enjoy new york ( hehe ), so he relocated to westmere soon after his initial arrival to nyc - finding a lot of comfort in living in a less populated area. he would commute during the hockey season to nyc, which to him wasn’t very far away, so this is where he’s been residing for the last three years !! however, in the last couple of weeks while training for the upcoming season my lil bb injured himself - not to get into tooooo much detail, i’ll just leave it at shoulder dislocation / joint separation due to a hard hit !! basically he’s out for this upcoming season, already having surgery completed, he’s currently healing for the next couple of months, allowing himself to fully experience that westmere fall !!!

   overall, etienne can come off as a bit reserved, and distant whether that be a result of his untrusting nature of others, or simply unfamiliarity. it takes a bit of time before he feels comfortable to share his true opinion / commentary / only doing so when he feels secure to do so. he’s not necessarily unfriendly, just a bit distant / lost in his thoughts. which varies, as with most ppl ofc, upon person to person and his level of comfortability among them. despite his often lack of conversation, he abhors an uncomfortable silence to settle and will fill it with nonsense to simply avoid the feeling altogether. so, if you ever want to catch him rambling, just making him uncomfortable dkjfngdf. he definitely approaches most things with a bit of ‘ tough love ‘ . he doesn’t mind getting into a quarrel or two if he knows its worth the outcome he’s envisioned. etienne will tell others when they are fucking up, and if they are throwing a punch as a result - catch him leaning into it, which explains his bout of reckless antics. he can come off as a know it all, when it comes to advice giving, but more so because he thinks he’s really good at analyzing others and situations they are in, not necessarily because he’s lived through them himself, he’s just rather intuitive and able to empathize quite easily with others despite his verbal admittance of it. when it comes down to this binches reckless bits, he just feels so intensely that he ends up numbing himself in the aftermath of it all ( especially bc he’s definitely not sharing those feelings with the people around him ), therefore he’s willing to put himself into harms way in order to get a bit of that - happiness / pain, it doesn’t matter to him as long as he no longer feels overwhelmed by numbness. so, if ya see him with some scrapes and stitches ~ mind ya business. but he’ll likely try to drag somebody else into it, and make it seem like it was their idea. but if he is truly comfortable with somebody, he walks a fine line of won’t stop talking, especially if it’s an interest of his, and comfortable silence.

_________________________

𝖕𝖊𝖗𝖘𝖔𝖓𝖆𝖑𝖎𝖙𝖞 & 𝖍𝖆𝖇𝖎𝖙𝖘

he is a CANCER, therefore in this essay i will..... kidding but here’s some fun cancer info i saw that applies to my bb !! at first he appears to be wistful, sarcastic ( maybe a lil crabby ) , shy, distant and mysterious. this personality remains if he isn’t completely comfortable around somebody. but overall, that’s just his facade, his ‘smokescreen’ of sorts to scare off the world from his outwards persona. underneath that layer ( makes me think of shrek metaphor with onions // don’t mind me ), BUT he’s gentle, kind and affectionate ( if you manage to make it to that level * bell dings * ) !!! overall, etienne is a sensitive soul, a bit emotional although he’d rather d*e than show that to others. likely will internalize anything that can hurt his feelings / a low blow and will do something chaotic as a result later on bc of it. very polite, and a little worldly, he is truly the epitome of old-school gentlemanly manners. chivalry coming as a second nature to him !!

that was getting ramble-y, so continuing HERE. but when it comes to romance, as per the cancer man, the concept of love is a mystery, one that etienne is trying to attain. however, his shyness and innate distrust of others make it difficult for him to allow himself to fall in love. his guard is always up when it comes to his emotions, and it’ll take a bit of prodding before he’s willing to speak up on what’s desired from him. he’s v picky when it comes to finding the “ partner of his dreams “ - but he’s def willing to throw himself into the romance of the situation, i.e. buying flowers, riding white horses, and slaying metaphorical dragons. the traditional side means that he will shower his partner with thoughtful gifts, wine and dine them in the best restaurants, and try to grant their every wish. he will take the garbage out, fix that wobbly shelf, navigate on road trips, and kill more so trap and release bugs for his partner, and most important of all he will do it all without being asked. his loyalty and keen attention to the needs and wants of his potential partner. so basically, more so willing to showcase through actions than speak on it. it’s the little things, right ??!?!?! he def cherishes not just the act of being in a relationship, but what it means to become one with another person in mind, body, and soul.

prides himself on being able to make a mean cup of coffee, likely the worst person to watch a movie with bc he knows exactly how it’s going to end after only watching five minutes of it, he has a godawful sense of direction, will walk in circles for fifteen minutes before even raising a question about it/noticing ( but he refuses to acknowledge it. )

his house, car, workspace, junk drawer, closet….you name it - it’s organized, practically sparkling. often times arranged by color, and / or style. nothing is ever out of place, and if it is - there’s trouble brewing. but, more than anything, if he’s visiting somebody’s place and it’s messy, he will spend a solid thirty minutes picking everything up before doing whatever it is that was intended.

likes : reading, flowers, handwritten notes/letters, deep cleaning, baking, working on his pottery, watching the history channel and true crime docs and playing / watching hockey !!

dislikes : artichoke, clutter, sandals ( fkjgh ), unrealistic plotlines in movies &+ burnt coffee.

habits :  likely has a severe caffeine addiction, although he’s now normalized having six cups of coffee throughout his day. he’s an early riser, no matter how little the amount of sleep he’s received, he’s always the first to rise - for his early morning runs !!

strengths: creative, insightful, inspiring, convincing, determined and passionate, decisive, altruistic, intuitive !!

weaknesses: sensitive, extremely private, perfectionist, low-key always needs to have a cause / purpose, can burn out easily !!

overall : etienne truly strives to be kind, and genuinely wants for everyone to get along. treat people with kindness and the like. he has the best of intentions, but often times that can get a bit muddled with the way he goes about things due to his bit of chaotic energy / as well as his often points of getting lost in his thoughts. he won’t realize he’s been quiet for the last three hours unless it’s mentioned to him. he will do anything to lighten a dark mood, and will sacrifice / throw himself under the bus if its needed. however, he also is the type to cause the dark mood depending on the day. wahoo! his more reckless antics increase when he’s feeling a bit emotional !! but he’ll likely try and convince somebody to propose the idea so it’s not on him.

𝖗𝖆𝖓𝖉𝖔𝖒 𝖍𝖊𝖆𝖉 𝖈𝖆𝖓𝖔𝖓𝖘

he lives with sebastian !! with his commuting to nyc for the hockey season, he wanted somebody to be able to take care of his house / garden and what not, and thus, seb arrived.

he’s v into making ceramics, cups / bowls / vases / etc !! what began as a fun hobby to distract himself in the offseason became something that he truly enjoys. ( laughing about that scene in ghost BUT DKJFNG OKAY ) although he’s pretty low-key about it, you can catch him at the farmers market selling his creations !! some pictures of his work can be found on his pinterest board !!

he is a vegetarian ! he has been since his freshman year of high school and has no plans on eating seafood/meat ever again.

he loves fancy wine ~ he’s cultured. 

he can play the drums !!

he collects vintage matchbooks and the stickers off of various fruits ( he puts them in a little notebook - can be found on his bookshelf ).

saves handwritten notes and letters from pals.

he loves to garden !!!! he has a specified rose shearing hat.

HE WANTS TO JOIN A BOOKCLUB PLEASE !!!!!!!! or at least have some casual moments of silence with another reading. plz and tysm.

to make things a bit simple, he has all of harry’s tattoos !!  might add more along the way !! stay tuned, folks !!

𝖜𝖆𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖉 𝖈𝖔𝖓𝖓𝖊𝖈𝖙𝖎𝖔𝖓𝖘

i am so up for anything!! please accept this ramble of ideas thrown below.  if you have any other ideas, lmk !!!! <3333 :’-) down to start from scratch and PLOT PLOT PLOT !

( 2 / 2 ) - BFFZ : the z for an added emphasis dkfjgnd. somebody who likely has a key to etienne’s house, they can enjoy one anothers company as well as the bouts of comfortable silence. you know how best friends are but kdjfngd still !! whether they are likeminded or polar opposites that just flow ~~ down for anything !! even a trio of sorts ?!

( 1 / 1 ) - RIDE OR DIE / CHAOTIC COMPANION : it would be wrong to say one is the more likely the bad influence over the other, although etienne may just be. these two find themselves bounding into, well hell, ( i guess??? ) together. playing on one anothers impulsiveness and if one ends up in the back of a police car, the other is handcuffed to them. and yet despite the length of their potential injuries, they find themselves thinking of something crazier to subject them to the next time around.

( 1 / 1 ) - GUARDIAN ANGEL / GOOD INFLUENCE : with etienne being a bit chaotic in nature, he needs somebody that is likely going to steer him clear from all the ideas that’ll bring him to the brink of disaster. he’s impulsive and in that desperate attempt to feel again, he’s very likely to bring a bit of mayhem upon himself. so while they may be worrying and attempting to talk his ideas down, he’s trying to get them to go along with his plan. it may be rare that he actually takes their advice, but when he does it seems to be for the best.

( 1 / 1 ) - PARTY FRIEND : these two know how to have a good time together. despite the amount of alcohol they are throwing back and the shenanigans they find themselves in as a result, this is a time where they also find themselves confiding in one another. if you look at their camera rolls, it’s likely they have tons of embarrassing and unflattering videos and pics of one another, in between their sob-worthy confessionals and venting/rants. these two trust one another, and although they love getting wreckT together, they find themselves discussing very raw and personal details. likely the only person etienne confides in, simply bc he’s completely plastered.

( 1 / 1 ) - SIBLING-LIKE RELATIONSHIP : these two have a love/hate relationship, very sibling like filled with pranks, competition, teasing and playful banter. however, when it comes down to it they have so much love and respect for one another. they know that no matter what happens they will always have one anothers back and be supportive of the other. truly a pure content filled relationship.

okay quick mention, ENEMY PLOTS ?!?!?!?!?!? i would live for one. i can’t imagine etienne being hardcore nasty, but i’d like to see whatever version comes out for this. so let’s get it djfngjakdfg maybe they just hold different viewpoints on the world and what not and clash, anything really !!! v open !!

( 1 / 1 ) - MENTOR - etienne needs a bit of structured or unstructured guidance, all depending on what their deemed mentor is wanting to impart on him, a bit of wisdom or slight chaos. kdjfgn he’ll take anything !! 

RANDOM LITTLE IDEAS : maybe they’ve heard of one another in town, but haven’t quite met yet! or maybe they see each other around all the time, but have yet to introduce themselves to one another but low-key maybe in some online forum for the town together ?! who knows some fun things kdjnfg i AM OPEN !

ooh maybe a slowburn of sorts ?! something spicy to wreck HIS and my life with.  dkfjgn we can base this off of chemistry !!! :’-)

[cvrnelivs]

— ( harry styles, cismale, he/him ) &. * — meet ( cornelius ‘ oliver ’ edwards ) ! ( he ) is ( twenty five ) years old and has lived in st. helens for ( two ) years . when they’re not helping the town prepare for halloween , they work as a ( baker ) . around here, they’re known to be ( idealistic ) & ( intuitive ) yet ( unpredictable ) & ( destructive ) and apparently their favorite fall activity is ( visiting the farmer’s market ) . safe to say it really wouldn’t be halloweentown without them !

hiya! i am kt &+ underneath the read more is a LOT of info about my bb, cornelius/oliver. ** insert clown emoji but make ‘em yee-haw ** if you’d like to plot you can reach me on here or at space cowboy#8536 on discord !! <33 v excited to interact with y’all and your bbs !!

( DISCLAIMER : THIS IS LONG - WOW !!! just felt a lot of muse !!! apologies !!  ) 

𝖘𝖙𝖆𝖙𝖎𝖘𝖙𝖎𝖈𝖘

name: cornelius oliver edwards.

nicknames: ollie, ol, lee !! literally whatever - “hey, you” dkjfgn

gender: cismale. pronouns: he, him.

age: twenty-five.

birthday: june 27th.

zodiac: cancer !!

orientation: pansexual / panromantic.

occupation: baker // aspiring filmmaker.

languages spoken: english & french.

𝖎𝖓𝖘𝖕𝖎𝖗𝖆𝖙𝖎𝖔𝖓

- PINTEREST - featuring his wardrobe, his home, his aesthetic, some character inspo and olive, his german shepard pup !!

- SPOTIFY PLAYLIST - what oliver is currently listening to !!

personality type: INFJ-T / THE ADVOCATE

moral alignment: chaotic good

style-wise: oliver is v stylish, but isn’t overly flashy by any means. he’s intuitive in the sense of what works and what doesn’t. willing to explore the latest wardrobe craze, but also just likes what he likes and likely won’t venture out unless pressed by another to do so. post coming soon for his wardrobe !!! they say that the cancer man’s clothing is selected to reflect “ sophistication over flash “ but kdgjn i’ll let ya’ll be the judge of that. he’s v much harry inspired clothing wardrobe, but also tones it down with some casual looks, especially with being in the bakery and getting his hands dirty in creative aspects !!

𝖇𝖆𝖈𝖐𝖌𝖗𝖔𝖚𝖓𝖉

   oliver was born in kent, england. he’s the youngest in his family of three, having an older brother and sister w/ two loving parents. when he was nine, his family packed up and moved to southern california, where they resided until oliver left for college on the east coast - his family trading off between living back in england and on the west coast throughout the year. upon moving to a new country at a young age, oliver truly found himself via escaping into various books and movies. often attempting to write his own and would force encourage his siblings to act his skits/plays out for his parents enjoyment. growing up, oliver also enjoyed playing all types of sports ( his parents kind of threw him in hoping he’d make friends ), but when it came down to it, athletic abilities-wise, there truly wasn’t anything that he wasn’t ‘ good ‘ at, and that’s simply because he’s always been such a competitive individual / as well as a perfectionist. that competitive/perfectionist energy caused him to go home and practice a skill or trick for hours in order to be able to come back the next day and whoop everyone’s asses. throughout highschool ; oliver was a v dedicated student. although he’s a bit reckless and loved to goof off, he was always acing classes and applying himself. he genuinely cares for others, you could’ve seen his ass volunteering at a soup kitchen with his mom on sundays and what not, as well as take part in various clubs and sports ! just SOFT and sportythings.

   post-high school, oliver attended NYU double majoring in film & television and dramatic writing. despite his extensive and well received portfolio, oliver has always been a perfectionist and overcritical of his work, unwilling to share his projects with anyone until he deems them to be ~ perfect ~ himself. after graduating, he spent a year traveling, trying to find a bit of inspiration around him and taking up odd jobs to get some $$ of his own, dog walking, attempting his best at being a handy man, etc !! he moved back home to socal, and eventually made his way up to st.helen’s after he was sent a job posting for the bakery in town !! although he knows he doesn’t want to pursue a career in baking forever, he’s enjoying his time while trying to find a bit more muse for his future film&writing career.

   overall, oliver can come off as a bit reserved, and distant whether that be a result of his untrusting nature of others, or simply unfamiliarity. it takes a bit of time before he feels comfortable to share his true opinion / commentary / only doing so when he feels secure to do so. he’s not necessarily unfriendly, just a bit distant / lost in his thoughts. which varies, as with most ppl ofc, upon person to person and his level of comfortability among them. despite his often lack of conversation, he abhors an uncomfortable silence to settle and will fill it with nonsense to simply avoid the feeling altogether. so, if you ever want to catch him rambling, just making him uncomfortable dkjfngdf. he definitely approaches most things with a bit of ‘ tough love ‘ . he doesn’t mind getting into a quarrel or two if he knows its worth the outcome he’s envisioned. oliver will tell others when they are fucking up, and if they are throwing a punch as a result - catch him leaning into it, which explains his bout of reckless antics. he can come off as a know it all, when it comes to advice giving, but more so because he thinks he’s really good at analyzing others and situations they are in, not necessarily because he’s lived through them himself, he’s just rather intuitive and able to empathize quite easily with others despite his verbal admittance of it. when it comes down to this binches reckless bits, he just feels so intensely that he ends up numbing himself in the aftermath of it all ( especially bc he’s definitely not sharing those feelings with the people around him ), therefore he’s willing to put himself into harms way in order to get a bit of that - happiness / pain, it doesn’t matter to him as long as he no longer feels overwhelmed by numbness. so, if ya see him with some scrapes and stitches ~ mind ya business. but he’ll likely try to drag somebody else into it, and make it seem like it was their idea. but if he is truly comfortable with somebody, he walks a fine line of won’t stop talking, especially if it’s an interest of his, and comfortable silence.

𝖕𝖊𝖗𝖘𝖔𝖓𝖆𝖑𝖎𝖙𝖞 & 𝖍𝖆𝖇𝖎𝖙𝖘

he is a CANCER, therefore in this essay i will..... kidding but here’s some fun cancer info i saw that applies to my bb !! at first he appears to be wistful, sarcastic ( maybe a lil crabby ) , shy, distant and mysterious. this personality remains if he isn’t completely comfortable around somebody. but overall, that’s just his facade, his ‘smokescreen’ of sorts to scare off the world from his outwards persona. underneath that layer ( makes me think of shrek metaphor with onions // don’t mind me ), BUT he’s gentle, kind and affectionate ( if you manage to make it to that level * bell dings * ) !!! overall, oliver is a sensitive soul, a bit emotional although he’d rather d*e than show that to others. likely will internalize anything that can hurt his feelings / a low blow and will do something chaotic as a result later on bc of it. very polite, and a little worldly, he is truly the epitome of old-school gentlemanly manners. chivalry coming as a second nature to him !!

that was getting ramble-y, so continuing HERE. but when it comes to romance, as per the cancer man, the concept of love is a mystery, one that oliver is trying to attain. however, his shyness and innate distrust of others make it difficult for him to allow himself to fall in love. his guard is always up when it comes to his emotions, and it’ll take a bit of prodding before he’s willing to speak up on what’s desired from him. he’s v picky when it comes to finding the “ partner of his dreams “ - but he’s def willing to throw himself into the romance of the situation, i.e. buying flowers, riding white horses, and slaying metaphorical dragons. the traditional side means that he will shower his partner with thoughtful gifts, wine and dine them in the best restaurants, and try to grant their every wish. he will take the garbage out, fix that wobbly shelf, navigate on road trips, and kill more so trap and release bugs for his partner, and most important of all he will do it all without being asked. his loyalty and keen attention to the needs and wants of his potential partner. so basically, more so willing to showcase through actions than speak on it. it’s the little things, right ??!?!?! he def cherishes not just the act of being in a relationship, but what it means to become one with another person in mind, body, and soul.

prides himself on being able to make a mean cup of coffee, likely the worst person to watch a movie with bc he knows exactly how it’s going to end after only watching five minutes of it, he has a godawful sense of direction, will walk in circles for fifteen minutes before even raising a question about it/noticing ( but he refuses to acknowledge it. )

his house, car, workspace, junk drawer, closet….you name it - it’s organized, practically sparkling. often times arranged by color, and / or style. nothing is ever out of place, and if it is - there’s trouble brewing. but, more than anything, if he’s visiting somebody’s place and it’s messy, he will spend a solid thirty minutes picking everything up before doing whatever it is that was intended.

likes : reading, flowers, handwritten notes/letters, deep cleaning, baking, curating soundtracks for his film projects, watching the history channel and true crime docs and playing / watching hockey !!

dislikes : artichoke, clutter, sandals ( fkjgh ), unrealistic plotlines in movies &+ burnt coffee.

habits : smoking cigarettes - although he’s been meaning to quit. likely has a severe caffeine addiction, although he’s now normalized having six cups of coffee throughout his day. he’s an early riser, no matter how little the amount of sleep he’s received, he’s always the first to rise - for his early morning runs !!

strengths: creative, insightful, inspiring, convincing, determined and passionate, decisive, altruistic, intuitive !!

weaknesses: sensitive, extremely private, perfectionist, low-key always needs to have a cause / purpose, can burn out easily !! 

overall : oliver truly strives to be kind, and genuinely wants for everyone to get along. treat people with kindness and the like. he has the best of intentions, but often times that can get a bit muddled with the way he goes about things due to his bit of chaotic energy / as well as his often points of getting lost in his thoughts. he won’t realize he’s been quiet for the last three hours unless it’s mentioned to him. he will do anything to lighten a dark mood, and will sacrifice / throw himself under the bus if its needed. however, he also is the type to cause the dark mood depending on the day. wahoo! his more reckless antics increase when he’s feeling a bit emotional !! but he’ll likely try and convince somebody to propose the idea so it’s not on him. 

𝖗𝖆𝖓𝖉𝖔𝖒 𝖍𝖊𝖆𝖉 𝖈𝖆𝖓𝖔𝖓𝖘

in an attempt to throw himself into the town’s traditions and what not, after moving to st. helen’s oliver decided it was upon himself to put on a very spooo0ooky haunted house! so, catch him converting his home into a haunted house for the month of october !!! nothing cheesy either !! it’s more a psychological scare dkjgn with some gore elements !! EnTeR iF yOu DaRe !!!

he bounced around playing sports growing up, but favored ice hockey and field lacrosse out of them all.

HE WANTS TO JOIN A BOOKCLUB PLEASE !!!!!!!! or at least have some casual moments of silence with another reading. plz and tysm.

he is a vegetarian ! he has been since his freshman year of high school and has no plans on eating seafood/meat ever again.

he loves fancy wine ~ he’s cultured. visits seb’s winery v often !!!

he can play the drums !!

he collects vintage matchbooks and the stickers off of various fruits ( he puts them in a little notebook - can be found on his bookshelf ).

saves handwritten notes and letters from pals.

he loves to garden !!!! he has a specified rose shearing hat.

to make things a bit simple, he has all of harry’s tattoos !!  might add more along the way !! stay tuned, folks !!

𝖜𝖆𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖉 𝖈𝖔𝖓𝖓𝖊𝖈𝖙𝖎𝖔𝖓𝖘

honestly, i am so up for anything !!! please accept this ramble of ideas thrown below.  if you have any other ideas, lmk !!!! <3333 :’-)

( 2 / 2 ) - BFFZ : the z for an added emphasis dkfjgnd. somebody who likely has a key to oliver’s house, they can enjoy one anothers company as well as the bouts of comfortable silence. you know how best friends are but kdjfngd still !! whether they are likeminded or polar opposites that just flow ~~ down for anything !! even a trio of sorts ?!

( 0 / ?? ) - MUSE(S) : somebody that he often strikes inspo from for his short films and what not !! or has starred/he plans to have them star in his future compilations of sorts !! can be simply from their own ideals, their look / ~vibe~ dkfjgn // whatever !!

( 1 / 1 ) - RIDE OR DIE / CHAOTIC COMPANION : it would be wrong to say one is the more likely the bad influence over the other, although oliver may just be. these two find themselves bounding into, well hell, ( i guess??? ) together. playing on one anothers impulsiveness and if one ends up in the back of a police car, the other is handcuffed to them. and yet despite the length of their potential injuries, they find themselves thinking of something crazier to subject them to the next time around.

( 1 / 1 ) - GUARDIAN ANGEL / GOOD INFLUENCE : with ollie being a bit chaotic in nature, he needs somebody that is likely going to steer him clear from all the ideas that’ll bring him to the brink of disaster. he’s impulsive and in that desperate attempt to feel again, he’s very likely to bring a bit of mayhem upon himself. so while they may be worrying and attempting to talk his ideas down, he’s trying to get them to go along with his plan. it may be rare that he actually takes their advice, but when he does it seems to be for the best.

( 0 / 1 ) - PARTY FRIEND : these two know how to have a good time together. despite the amount of alcohol they are throwing back and the shenanigans they find themselves in as a result, this is a time where they also find themselves confiding in one another. if you look at their camera rolls, it’s likely they have tons of embarrassing and unflattering videos and pics of one another, in between their sob-worthy confessionals and venting/rants. these two trust one another, and although they love getting wreckT together, they find themselves discussing very raw and personal details. likely the only person oliver confides in, simply bc he’s completely plastered.

( 1 / 1 ) - SIBLING-LIKE RELATIONSHIP : these two have a love/hate relationship, very sibling like filled with pranks, competition, teasing and playful banter. however, when it comes down to it they have so much love and respect for one another. they know that no matter what happens they will always have one anothers back and be supportive of the other. truly a pure content filled relationship.

okay quick mention, ENEMY PLOTS ?!?!?!?!?!? i would live for one. i can’t imagine oliver being hardcore nasty, but i’d like to see whatever version comes out for this. so let’s get it djfngjakdfg maybe they just hold different viewpoints on the world and what not and clash, anything really !!! v open !!

( 1 / 1 ) - MENTOR - oliver needs a bit of structured or unstructured guidance, all depending on what their deemed mentor is wanting to impart on him, a bit of wisdom or slight chaos. kdjfgn he’ll take anything !! life advice in any and all aspects. maybe they come into the bakery, or maybe they help him with his garden. who knows, i certainly don’t know how they met, but we’ll figure it out ?!?!

RANDOM LITTLE IDEAS : maybe they’ve heard of one another in town, but haven’t quite met yet! or maybe they see each other around all the time, but have yet to introduce themselves to one another but low-key maybe in some online forum for the town together ?! who knows some fun things kdjnfg i AM OPEN !

ooh maybe a slowburn of sorts ?! something spicy to wreck ollie’s and my life with.  dkfjgn we can base this off of chemistry !!! :’-) 

[lanamemories2]

THE CHARACTER STATISTICS

FULL NAME — lana rose jameson

NICKNAME — idk if she has many nicknames altho.... rod exclusively calls her banana..... some call her lana banana n her teacher as a kid wld call her lala land bc she ws always nt focusing..... bt mostly ppl call her lana......... she “dated” a loser tht wld exclusively call her sugar nips bt >_> i can’t let tht count i simply can’t..... i’ll throw up.

D.O.B. — june 2nd 1998

LINK TO THEIR PINTEREST BOARD OR TAG ON YOUR BLOG — tag n pinterest

STAR SIGN / MOON & RISING — gemini / virgo / pisces

MBTI — ESFP (the entertainer)

MORAL ALIGNMENT — chaotic good

MARITAL STATUS & SEXUALITY — single n bisexual

LANGUAGES — english

TALENTS / HOBBIES — dancing, origami (doesn’t rly publicise tht), rollerskating, cheer (altho i think she’s prob given tht up nw she’s working), humming ALL the time, collecting records, shopping, partying ig bc she does it 24/7

TOP 5 MUSICIANS —  the velvet underground, wild cherry, the rolling stones, donna summer n robyn

FAVOURITE BOOK — isn’t rly a big reader....... she read mre when she ws younger bt she’d find it difficult to concentrate n nt lose her place on a page...... she mostly liked picture books i think her fav as a kid wldv been one of those big illustrated encyclopedias of fairies

FAVOURITE FILM & TV SHOW — she likes musicals like cabaret n rocketman n moulin rouge bt then also coraline n moonrise kingdom n twilight n my neighbour totoro..... i think she likes anything thts rly pretty n interesting to look at. lovs sex n the city fr tv probably gossip girl.... vampire diaries :/ lots of trashy stuff.... also broad city

FAVOURITE VIDEO GAME — she doesn’t rly play games bt she does luv the princess peach game fr the nds

WHAT DID THEY DO THIS PAST SUMMER? — she usually jets off to like 5742759742 countries bt i think except fr visiting caleb montgomery (shout out 2 alli lov u) in paris fr a handful of days one week she stayed local n worked at the burlesque club n jst hd a sexy time in lovell going wild.............. living the vida loca................

WHERE HAVE THEY TRAVELLED? — god. literally sm places i cldnt even name them all.......... spits on the floor.......... me in a riot club vc: i am SICK to DEATH of RICH PPL! (new way sexier version)

DO THEY TAKE ANY PRESCRIPTIONS? — she’s been prescribed like 985729574 diff things fr adhd over the yrs bt she nvr rly tkes them ://// she hd a bad experience w one where it mde her feel kind of lethargic n sad n since she jst.... amasses them in her bedside cabinet instead of taking them.

DO THEY HAVE ANY DIAGNOSIS’S? — adhd n when she attended a few sessions of therapy her therapist quickly recognised she hd ptsd n lots of.... unexplored trauma :/ sighs.... 

FICTIONAL CHARACTER THEY ARE MOST LIKE? — penny lane, molly gunn, alabama worley, satine (moulin rouge).... also reminds me of edie sedgwick (factory girl) n linda lovelace (lovelace) bt they’re technically real so 🤷

ARE THEY EMPLOYED? WHERE DO THEY WORK? — at a burlesque club in downtown lovell!! she’s a 💃

WERE THEY POPULAR IN HIGH SCHOOL? — ya lana jst...... was friends w n slept w everyone bt she ws kind of like marmite like u love or u hate her....... bc of hw promiscuous/wild she ws n whether ppl agreed w tht or not.... mostly loved tho i wnt lie

DO THEY DO DRUGS? ya she’ll honestly jst.... tke whatever someone gives her she’s very ://// impressionable n up fr anything

DRINK? — ya way..... way too mch n often

SMOKE CIGARETTES? — non merci!

SMOKE WEED? — again ya bt usually jst if ppl offer she doesn’t buy fr herself

WHERE WERE THEY BORN? WHERE DID THEY GROW UP? — her mum went into labour bkstage at a rock concert in nyc bt her family home is in albany n she grew up sort of like.... between there n nyc n LA bc her dad’s company hd studios dwn there

DO THEY PLAN TO GO TO GRAD SCHOOL? — no

WHAT ARE THEIR PLANS POST-GRADUATION? — lana doesn’t believe in plans. prefers spontaneous. deciding things on whims

PARENTS NAMES — richard n victoria (rich n vic)

DO THEY HAVE SIBLINGS? NAMES & AGES? — caleb jameson!!!! holds his severely depressed hand. he’s 25 or mayb 26 now?? much to contemplate.

DO THEY HAVE PETS? TYPES & NAMES? — no pets lana’s so forgetful n irresponsible she’d completely blank on feeding it n get rly sad when she realised so it’s jst.... best nt to...... even tho she does Love animals

ARE THEY RELIGIOUS? WHAT IS THEIR RELIGION IF SO? — no altho she does tlk to her brother’s best friend tommy in her dreams n in some ways tht feels kind of religious like he’s....... still here w her trying to keep her safe in some way....... she wld nvr say tht bt she likes to think so

HOW MANY PEOPLE HAVE THEY SLEPT WITH? — god i genuinely cld Not even estimate.... it’s easily in the hundreds...... she hs ://// a problem

WHAT VEHICLE DO THEY DRIVE? IF THEY DON’T DRIVE, HOW DO THEY TRAVEL AROUND TOWN? — if she ws gna get a car it’d b a pastel convertible cadillac she’s obsessed w them she thinks they’re the coolest car.... bt she’s an awful driver. honestly she typically gets driven around everywhere by ppl..... or ubers

DESCRIBE THEIR FASHION — luvs red so a lot of tht bt honestly jst a lot of colour in general altho mainly warm tones...... penny lane style jackets, pastel faux fur coats, lots of slip dresses, corduroy flares, crochet tops, skimpy sequin halters, lots of sheer, glitter, red cowboy boots, go-go boots, any form of seventies platform, jst like.... lots of statement pieces.... LOTS of strange sunglasses elton john style..... sometimes jst randomly accessorises w stickers on random body parts...... doesn’t believe in being overdressed jst wears whtever she wants whenever she wants

DO THEY PREFER TO BE BEHIND THE CAMERA OR IN FRONT OF IT? — in front

DO THEY BELIEVE ANY OF THE STORIES ABOUT RADCLIFFE? WHICH ONES? — no lana prefers to mke up her own like she hs this whole one abt the trees where she thinks they hv souls in them n mkes up stories fr the diff lives the trees lived......... hers r nvr rly tht scary just fun n whimsical.....

DO THEY THINK THE MOTHMAN IS HOT? — yes

A QUOTE THAT DESCRIBES THEM —  “She would be half a planet away, floating in a turquoise sea, dancing by moonlight to flamenco guitar.”

A SONG THAT THEY WOULD RELATE TO — disco biscuit love by the jezabels ://////

[rydiin]

Do you think he kept the picture of him mom in his pocket while it happened bc he wanted her to be with him while he did it (like in a bad way) he always told her he was gonna blow up the school and stuff and that it could’ve be been his way of getting back at her, kind of like he did with putting his MAGA hat in her grave? Or he just had that picture with him always idk

That’s a really good question....and I’m honestly not sure 😔 trust me, I’ve spent SO much time thinking about this. It’s so hard to reach a conclusion but by the end of this post I kind of do.

If we’re looking at this from a black and white lens, there’s two views/opinions:

VIEW #1: NC loves his mother and wanted to honor her and remember her always, so he kept her photo with him at all times (or as often as possible). People who claim this use the instance of his fight with Rock as an example, since (allegedly) the fight started because he couldn’t find a photo of his mother so he was frustrated. Indicating that he often clung to a photo of her as comfort.

VIEW #2: NC despised his mother. Sure, maybe he “loved” her in the basic way that everyone “loves” their mother...deep down he may have loved how she nurtured him and cared for him for so long. But ultimately he despised her and wanted to cause her pain. I’ll admit, there seems to be far more evidence thus far of THIS side than the first (the fact that he knocked her teeth out, he assaulted her many times, he chased her out the house with a rifle, and just read my somewhat recent post on the banker on nT to hear about allll the allegations of emotional and even physical abuse against her....he wanted her to die.)

For this side, it would also make sense for the photo to be in his pocket during the sh**ting. According to allegations, he told his mom things that foreshadowed the sh**ting, they were basically threats of what he was going to do. These quotes included, “no one will stop me from what I need to do”, “they will really know me soon, don’t worry, they’ll see.” He told her he was going to “bl*w up the school”. So he was clearly warning his mom that one day he would commit mass horror. The way he spoke to her, he almost treated her as if she was in the way of this plan by saying things such as telling Lynda to k*ll herself or that he’d do it for her because THEN no one would stop him from what needed to be done. Or how he said that when Lynda was gone, he’d be able to do whatever he wanted.

We also cannot forget the MAGA hat incident. He buried his mom with this hat and by his own admission he did this because he knew his mother hated Trump, so he thought it would be funny. I remember when the news of this first broke many accounts tried to say “Aww; this hat meant so much to him so burying her with it was an act of him giving her something that he prized.” Pretty sure I fell for it too! But then Hunter revealed NC’s actual intentions behind it and those sweet assumptions sort of went out the window lol

All of this anger and hatred that he seemed to have toward his mother, and this spirit of revenge that we see in the MAGA hat action and even in his language from the banker allegations, it would make complete sense for him to carry his mom’s photo with him when he went and committed the sh**ting, almost as if this was the final “F*** YOU” to his mom.

____________________________________________

So those are the two sides if we’re looking at it in black and white terms. And as much as I hate to say it, the reason the second side has such a longer explanation is because there’s not much evidence for the first side 😣 Like I know we love to think that he adored his mother and was a mamas boy through and through, but his actions and words just did not align with this. I will admit that much of what we know is based off of witness statements, so I’m not saying any of this is solid fact. But when you combine his evidenced assaults against his mother, and the reliability of certain statements, specifically his brother Zach and friend Hunter, (I don’t know much about the banker so I won’t comment on how reliable she is, altho her statement does seem to line up with things we already did know)....it’s clear that NC acted extremely hatefully toward his mom and I wouldn’t hold it past him to have her photo in his pocket as a last act of retribution against her.

But then we step out of the black and white and realize that BOTH could potentially be true. Which I know people may find absurd. But someone was asking me recently to explain more about my own family dynamic with my mama because I’ve shared how I reallllly treated her terrible during my teenage years. It haunts me everyday. That woman was my world, and yet I seemed to blame her for every ounce of suffering I ever had to go through. So while I never sought revenge (to this extreme) against her for these falsely perceived wrongs, I can at least empathize with NC because I know what it’s like to have such a skewed perception of reality that you literally treat the person who loves you the most as your ENEMY. And you say anything you can to hurt them and break them down because you’re so convinced that the pain you suffer is somehow due to the power they hold over your life 😞

So if I had to even come close to explaining my opinion on this, it’d be just that. He loved her. I believe he did. I hear the pain and genuine heartache in his voice during those 911 calls where he has to tell the operator he just lost his mom. It’s tear-jerking because it is so raw and real 🤧 And yet, he hated her. He despised her because, in his false view of reality, if ANYONE could’ve given him a better life where he was more accepted by others, more welcomed at school and in the neighborhood, viewed as more normal by his peers, it would’ve been his mom. He saw her as his superhero in a sense. She was with him to care and nurture since day one...so why couldn’t she fix the “injustices” he faced as a young boy being outcasted by society? Why couldn’t she make life easier for him outside of their home? In his eyes, she should’ve been able to do all this. And yet, she didn’t!!! So she had to pay.

He made sure that she was with him during that sh**ting. Some even say he was TALKING TO HER while looking for people to k*ll. This was a very personal thing between the two of them, in his eyes. Although she was dead by then, he refused to let her go without forcing her to see the final straw....... what he was “forced” to do because SHE never rescued him and made life easier for him, or at least as easy and bearable as he was wanting.

[faerites]

25, 27, 35, 84 & 89 for your hawkes? bonus question because i love hawkes: what do they think of the other companions? but if that would be too long an answer you can leave that one lmao

under cut for length, i got Too Many Hawkes

25. what is their biggest flaw?

ashes   —   ooh. his loyalty to people is usually a good thing, but i think it’d probably be his most obvious flaw, too. he can definitely take it too far; for example, if his friend is blatantly in the wrong in a situation, yeah he’ll try to persuade them to see/do differently but if he really can’t then he’ll always back them up rather than sticking to what he believes is right, even if he doesn’t like it. when anders blew up the chantry (yeah yeah #AndersWasRight etcetc but) it’s not something ashes would approve of if it had been anyone other than a loved one behind it; he Massively prefers diplomacy and peace and he doesn’t condone loss of life in any situation. but specifically Because it was anders he’ll work himself to the bone defending him and making excuses even if it puts him in a situation he really doesn’t want to be in amulet   —   god where to begin. i love her dearly but she is Made of flaws. it could be her materialism and how spoiled she is; she does have her reasons for it (she grew up poor and on the run, so when she finally has money and luxury she clings to it for all it’s worth so as not to lose it again), but she definitely takes it way too far. she’s obsessed w wealth and physical possessions and she places way too much value on having and getting them. it could also be her obliviousness; she really just Can’t Tell when she’s getting on someone’s nerves or when she’s being unfair or when she’s doing something wrong, and if someone says anything about it to her she’ll treat it as a personal attack that came out of nowhere. she’s also super self-absorbed, which ties into her materialism — she doesn’t do it intentionally, and she’s a genuinely sweet person if you dig under it all, but most people don’t see that side of her and the parts they Do see are pretty off-putting. ryan   —   Self-Deprecation Central Baby. they honestly jump to extreme lengths to blame themselves for everything; there are things like their mother’s and brother’s deaths, which they’ve convinced themselves they could have prevented if they’d been faster, stronger, more skilled, etcetera, but it’s also like… if something bad happens on the other side of the country and they hear about it, they’ll be like if only i’d been there, i could have helped, oh god it’s my fault which is. ridiculous. it Very much weighs them down and they are Not a happy person (after everything they begin to convince themselves that everyone close to them Will get hurt bc they’re like. a curse on people which is not fun) tristan   —   once again, where to begin. he’s just a bastard through-and-through. i guess i’ll go with his indifference. he just Does Not Care about you or your problems and he’s not going to pretend he does. he can watch awful shit happening in front of him and not bat an eye because, well, it’s got nothing to do with him. being named champion is A Nightmare because now people think they can ask him for help with the dumbest shit and he Hates it. he’s also super cold; he genuinely doesn’t particularly place any value on the lives of people he doesn’t know, and he Literally Has straight-up killed people who just happen to get on his nerves (see: javaris tintop). rowan   —   hm. probably his stubbornness. once he’s formed an opinion on something, or he plans to do something, you Cannot dissuade him from it no matter what, and no matter who the person trying to is. it’s gotten him in danger, it’s gotten his friends in danger, and it’s gotten innocent bystanders in danger.

27. what is their biggest strength?

ashes   —   his compassion. he’ll take you in off the streets and cook you a warm meal if you need it, he’ll help you out in any way you ask no matter what he’s doing, he’ll stitch you little gifts out of the blue for no particular occasion. he’s filled with a lot of love and he has no compunctions about sharing it around; he just wants everyone to be happy and safe. amulet   —   her generosity. she’s self-centered in a lot of ways, like i described in the last question, but she’s also genuinely charitable. she loves Giving to her friends and feeling needed and appreciated; she’ll help you with money, she’ll buy things for you at the slightest indication you like something, she’ll give you clothes and do your hair and makeup for you (along with some obliviously harsh comments about how awful it all looked before and how she has to help you fix it). ryan   —   it feels a little like repeating ashes’ answer, but their kindness. same as he does, they’re filled with love, and they want to make sure everyone gets more than their fair share of it, whether they know you or not. they’ll bankrupt themselves donating to people, and they’ll help out more than they can handle until they’re exhausted and worn, and they’ll never ask for anything in return. tristan   —   his intelligence or his honesty. he’s quick-witted in a street-smart kind of way; he knows how things work, is pretty good at reading people and seeing past what they say and how they act on the surface, and he can calculate what the most effective way of doing something is in Seconds (this can, of course, be bad too; he can fling a knife into someone’s head at the perfect angle before anyone else has even had time to realise what he’s considering). as for his honesty, he just really doesn’t see the point in lying; it’s not that he has a moral objection to it, but lying just feels useless to him. he doesn’t care enough about things to want to hide them or cover them up; if he doesn’t like someone, he’ll just tell them straight-out; if he doesn’t want to do something, he’ll say so; and if he wants to hurt someone, the truth can often do that far easier than a lie. rowan   —   probably his courage and loyalty. pretty self-explanatory; he’ll fight to the death for you, and if you’re loyal to him, he’ll be loyal to you until the end.

35. what is the easiest way to annoy them?

ashes   —   anyone being needlessly cruel and unkind is the obvious one, but that just saddens him more than it annoys him. i’ll go with people escalating things, choosing violence where it doesn’t need to be chosen; if there’s a peaceful solution viable, and someone decides to go in guns blazing instead of trying it first, he has no respect for that. amulet   —   honestly, just not appreciating her. if she feels ignored or put-down or disliked, she will throw something of a tantrum over it. she comes off as arrogant to people sometimes, but it’s more of an intense need to be liked and wanted; if she feels like she’s not getting that, it upsets her very easily and she’ll lash out and get defensive. ryan   —   any kind of injustice or bullying will fire them up. it’s pretty hard to anger or annoy them, but that’s a fairly sure way of managing it; they Do Not respond well to seeing the brutality mages have to endure, especially picturing bethany and anders and merrill and her father in those situations, and they do end up having little arguments with aveline here and there about how the guards treat city elves once their eyes are opened to that. they hate stereotypes and prejudice. tristan   —   just. be up in his face and don’t respect his boundaries. talkative people piss him off pretty quick (he’d Hate amulet). he doesn’t like people getting over-familiar (he is Not Your Friend, and he does not appreciate you acting like he is), and asking him for favours is also guaranteed to irritate him, especially if you Keep Doing It for things you could easily handle yourself or with someone that is Not Him. rowan   —   templars. templars. circles. anti-mage rhetoric. he Will get into a bar-fight over this. he will get fired up and passionate and Fervent over this in casual conversation.

84. which deadly sin do they represent best?

ashes   —   it’s kind of unexpected, but i’ll go with lust. somewhat by process of elimination, because he doesn’t really fit any of the others, but it does make sense from a certain perspective. amulet   —   easily greed, with pride and envy close behind. ryan   —   sloth. more the mental kind than the physical. DepressionTM. tristan   —   wrath. rowan   —   probably wrath too.

89. what is their d&d alignment?

ashes   —   neutral good. amulet   —   lawful neutral throughout the game, but post-game after travelling for a while with isabela and loosening up a bit she probably falls into true neutral. ryan   —   neutral good. tristan   —   chaotic evil? chaotic neutral? i could see arguments for both. rowan   —   chaotic good.

[queenofthefaces]

*slams down paper* Give a thesis on Stanny boy. :D

I finished all my exams so LETS FUCKIGN GO!!! A lot of this is personal interpretation combined w hc character development 👌 I went kinda off topic bc y’all apparently like my analysis!! So here u go!!

1) sexuality hc: I love exploring queer themes w Stan sm ;;o;; I think he’s an incredibly relatable character and fandom tends to focus on his good morals so he’s the kinda character we’re more comfortable exploring like that :0 (unlike Eric who’s Problematic or Kyle who’s pretty morally gray and who has some questionable interactions w the ppl he’s had romantic interactions w)

And I love portraying Stan’s exploration into his sexuality as a very...slow kind of journey? Like Stan being someone who’s pretty ignorant but earnest, and appreciating when someone is able to help guide him (like Kenny or wendy)

But to the question: I hc Stan as bi!! Like a lot of ppl do :0 again w the slow journey, I see Stan as being the kind of person who would get into queer issues, and just being curious in general and asking questions, alongside wanting to explore w other people—like feeling a romantic/sexual tension w/ another boy but not knowing what it means, and only after he’s had someome start to guide him does he connect the pieces. Like Stan realizing “oh all those times I had a CRUSH on that guy I didn’t just admire him” sort of thing

And it’d be a very personal journey as well, I can’t imagine Stan being open or talking abt his sexuality while he’s still tryna figure it out, mostly bc he isn’t sure abt himself and he doesn’t feel secure enough to be open, plus he’s probably shy abt that kinda thing in the beginning.

And honestly I prefer Stan exploring his sexuality with Wendy or Kenny—I have a whole hc that he’d be uncomfortable with talking to kyle about it, not bc he has anything against Kyle—it’s just that Kyle sometimes gets too in his own head, gets uncomfortable with serious conversations, can sometimes leave Stan behind, and can think he knows Stan best/talks over Stan. I can’t see Kyle being someone patient enough to let Stan talk without adding in his own two cents and confusing or frustrating Stan, and Stan needs someone attentive and non-judgmental to talk things through

Wendy (esp w Wendy as a v knowledgeable queer person) is a good choice to help Stan out bc she’s very compassionate, emotionally sensitive, and wants to help.

(Going into hc-zone:) wendy might also fall into the thing Kyle does where she talks over Stan, in that she knows *so much* she thinks she can guess what Stan feels and kind of flood him with too much information unintentionally. It’s not a bad thing to try and inform him about gender stuff and bi/pan/ply/omnisexualities but Stan isn’t ready for all that yet. And I think Stan is also the kind of person who wouldn’t be super comforted by labels and facts the way Wendy is. Where Wendy likes having specific definitions to explain how she feels, Stan is overwhelmed by those labels bc he’ll overthink them and doubt himself

...which is why I prefer Stan exploring this stuff with Kenny, bc I have a really elaborate kind of relationship development between those two that could blossom if they let themselves grow closer, esp during times where Eric and Kyle are off doing Their Thing. Kenny being someone who’s incredibly sure of who he is, being a great listener, very emotionally sensitive, able to keep a secret, and able to read people well and handle situations between people. Ken is the type who can listen to Stan w/o judging him or making him feel overwhelmed, and knows when to ask questions and when to back off, etc. I have a whole thing abt how their developing relationship can be incredibly mutually beneficial but Yanno that’s for the next bulletpoint 👌 basically Kenny could be someone Stan can explore himself with, and not be pressured

And then there’s Stan’s gender identity which I also Love. I love nb Stan. Just in the kind of nb where he doesn’t want to give himself a specific label, he just wants to Be Himself, whatever that means. I hc Stan as primarily male-aligned nb, in that he’s most comfortable with being a guy or being perceived as a guy and generally presenting masc, but a lot of that is in Stan being more *socially* comfortable presenting that way, instead of him feeling more “like a guy.” I hc Stan to primarily use he/him pronouns but to also be ok w/ she/they depending on the situation. I think Wendy and Kenny would also help him w this, in hc’ing both of them as nb as well (though of course their identities manifest in different ways and they’re comfortable doing different things than Stan)

(Also I love Stan using goth stuff to explore his gender and presentation....using a more feminine name like Raven?? Being able to use nor androgynous ways of dressing?? I lov him sm ;;o;;)

(Plus I have a big hc I love where Stan tries to come out to his parents and he’s bracing for impact for the response and BOTH TIMES his dad STEALS THE SPOTLIGHT bc it’s like “ugh, what is it with kids these days coming up with FAKE TERMS for stuff that’s JUST NORMAL. It’s NORMAL to think about wanting to kiss other guys Stan duh” and Sharon and Stan just. “No....dad....straight men don’t want to kiss other men wtf” and later it’s “ok Stan I believe you about the bisexuality thing but this nonbinary thing?? Again it’s NORMAL!! To feel like a bit of both and want to be seen as a woman sometimes” and Stan’s just pinching his nose again.

He was afraid of becoming his father but. Not like this. Nb bi KINGS)

2) Otp: STENNY!!!!! I love stenny sm. (But I’ll get into that in a bit but first)

S/tendy is also really really cute, but imo it’s the pinnacle of school love. I feel like Stan and Wendy can be good together and genuinely like each other’s company, but I feel like their life goals and ambitions would stray, and they wouldn’t be completely compatible in a way that would be really sustainable as adults. It’s not a bad thing, and I think they could absolutely remain close friends w/o necessarily needing a romantic relationship

Anyways. I adore Stenny. A lot of it again revolves around some development hc stuff I have, mostly in how compatible and mutually beneficial the relationship can be. I like imagining them growing closer and more intimate w each other in a very private kind of way. Like them hanging out one on one, and eventually that evolves into texting, calling, sleeping over w just the two of them, etc, until they have this entire close relationship that’s all their own

And with compatibility, I think both Kenny and Stan are incredibly compassionate, sensitive, thoughtful people who can just sit and enjoy some silence. Unlike Eric and Kyle, who need constant mental stimulation—who need to be DOING things—Stan and Kenny can just...relax. And I think their sensitivity can also lead them to be able to support each other emotionally. Both of them can listen to each other, both of them are capable of having serious conversations and being patient through those conversations, both of them are perceptive and sensitive enough to recognize what the other is feeling and to have some idea of what to do about it. I think they’re both good at knowing how to take care of people (rather than someone like Kyle, who likes taking care of others but doesn’t really know how to do it very well; he’s like his mother in that way, he’s good at obvious stuff like injuries and crying but he can be kinda overbearing, presumptuous, and indelicate abt the quieter stuff but ENOUGH abt Kyle AHJSKDKF)

I think stenny is strong also in how the two can help one another. Kenny is realistic but careful and can provide support for Stan when he’s going through a rough patch. Kenny shows up to Stan’s room in the middle of the night with water and snacks and listens to Stan rant or just *is there* to show Stan he’s not alone. Kenny answers Stan’s 2am texts when Stan can’t sleep and stays on the phone with him all night to keep him company

And Stan is earnest in how much he cares abt his friends and would just...really easily show he cares w/o any judgement. Stan saves seats for Kenny, sends him “be safe!” texts when Ken goes home, offers his bed and his home to Kenny and Karen when they need a place to stay, and it never has an air of pity or self-righteousness about it—it’s just Stan genuinely being nice. And that kind of attention and care is a breath of fresh air for Ken, whos usually forgotten

And both of them are just. They’re a shoulder to cry on, or a pillar to lean against. And that’s smth they need—Stan to feel listened to, Kenny bc he takes on so much stress. They can be a rock for each other.

3) brotp: I love Stan making friends honestly ;;o;;

like I said in my kyle analysis I love the super best friends a lot ;;o;; they really care abt each other and don’t want to lose each other which is really nice. I just...love them being best friends + brotherly towards each other

But I also like Stan making friends outside of the m4—with the girls or the goth kids or even with someone like Tweek. (Though I cant really see him hanging out w “Craig’s gang” mostly bc there’s this air of exclusivity w the “groups,” like an established dynamic that no one really likes to cross, bc they’ve all jus Known each other for so long and have solidified those groups + dynamics—though I can see him also befriending the individual members of Craig’s gang, esp token or jimmy)

His friendship w the goth kids means a lot to me HONESTLY I love the idea of them remaining friends bc they vibe together well—esp when they get a better hang of mental health stuff, and they can talk abt gender and coping mechanisms and cool movies they’ve watched ;;o;; i think being with the goth kids could be a really important part of Stan forming his personal identity and while I don’t think they’d be *best friends* I can still see them as ppl he’d invite to his parties or to the movies and stuff

4) notp: s...st/yle, bc like I said in my kyle analysis I just. Can’t see it. I think kyle hurts Stan too much and that they need to work on their friendship, and that they’re much more compatible as friends than as anything else. I much much prefer a brotherly relationship where they’d feel weird even thinking about kissing each other lol

My other notps for Stan are less about me not liking the ship and more abt me like. Not wanting the characters w anyone else but who I already ship them with. I don’t like Stan with Craig or Tweek bc I can’t see those two w anyone but each other, for example. (Plus I have a lotta hc’s abt craig and his feelings for Tweek ;;o;; craig is a one man kinda guy lmao)

Though I do think Stan is extremely compatible with lots of characters. Idk why ppl ship Kyle w everyone when I don’t think kyle is v compatible with ppl—Stan is def someone who could date like. Just abt anyone. I don’t like Stan ships that aren’t stenny or st/endy but I can at least understand them. Stan is just really nice and approachable and can get along w a lotta people

5) First hc I think of: oh I love the hc that Stan sometimes writes his own music, but he’s kinda shy abt his voice so he doesn’t sing very often.

Or hc that he has a bit of a “dad bod” when he gets older. And the chubbier he is, the happier and more relaxed he is ;;o;; (Bc if Stan is too aware of his body and trying to work out to get the “perfect” figure, he’ll stress over it)

Or Stan growing up to breed service dogs ;;o;; (thank u magnus burnsides for this PERFECT idea)

6) how I relate to this character: I’ve kinda incorporated my own gender stuff into my interpretation of Stan (though I relate more to my gender-interpretation of Kenny)

But I think.....hm. It’s kinda hard to pick out a way I relate to Stan bc I’m so invested in seeing him grow and develop it doesn’t feel like it relates to me. Probably tho I relate to his weird balance of loyalty vs exasperation. Stan loves his friends and family and will do a lot for them. But my god. Sometimes they’re all so stupid. Randy being randy is obvious but remember when Kyle had a breakdown over the fucking Facebook farm game?? Stan is so tired

7) what gives me secondhand embarrassment abt Stan: uhhhh hm. Well, sometimes he’s kinda ignorant and goes along w what everyone else is doing, but honestly I don’t really cringe over Stan. He’s learning and trying and I can’t really fault him for that so much

8) cinnamon roll or problematic fave: cinnamon roll ;;o;; Stan is someone who’s usually pretty genuine and I love his role as the “straight man” in a lot of the stories. He’s been through a lot but I want him to just...be happy ;;o;; I love portrayals of Stan where he can be happy?? Like yeah he can be a cynic but he’s also really compassionate and I jus ;;o;;

[anarcho-decepticonism]

we fixed hsm

here are our 3 page fanfic plans

Troy & gabriella break up after like a month in college. Gabriella is around people smarter than her for the first time in her life & she’s really struggling & he doesn’t understand what she’s going thru & she realizes that he’s not that empathetic & bad at communicating. She’s single for like a year just adjusting to college & making new friends & figuring out who she is after hs & also not putting her entire identity in her intelligence. She tries out for theater & they’re like “you’re not that good at singing” & she’s like “never mind” bc she liked it because it was with her friends in the first place. She finds community elsewhere & eventually is in a more fulfilling & communicative & mature relationship

Troy is having a lot of trouble bc being a student athlete isn’t enough at FUCKING BERKELEY!!! And he’s having trouble at school. He also isn’t getting lead roles in the theater program bc it’s like. A hobby as opposed to his major/career path. He has to learn to like things without being the best at them & also communicate w people better. He’s no longer super special and the focal point of everything. He immediately tries to rebound by getting a new gf & she realizes right away that he just wants her to love him and pay attention to him and solve his problems and is like “fuck that dude go to therapy”. He goes to the school therapist which sucks but he finds a good therapist & like. Improves as a person lol. He has to think more abt the experiences of others and not need to have everyone love him all the time. He gets a dog -- good for him bc he has to be responsible for the life of something else but also dogs are very affectionate

Sharpay goes to UA & at first loves it bc she’s the star but then is super underwhelmed & depressed. She talks to Ryan and he’s like “you know you can just transfer” and she’s like “wow i’m so smart i’ll just transfer”. After like a semester she transfers to a different school with a good theater program (not Juliard tho). She has a good mentor figure who’s a prof who’s like “your ambition and drive are good things actually especially bc ur a woman and will be told that ur awful & bossy for standing up for yourself.” she makes her first real friend other than her brother (i am So sad) in a theater class-- not someone who worships her but like an actual human connection. Specifically a girl who she respects & doesn’t feel she has to compete with. She has a learning moment when her friend gets the lead role and Sharpay is genuinely proud of her and she realizes she wouldn’t have been suited to that part and that she doesn’t have to be the center of attention all the time. She learns to derive self worth from her love of theater instead of from everyone validating her. Also her friend is goth & tells her that all the pink she wears is bad. They both initially loved the theater bc they wanted to be accepted but learn together that they can just find worth in each other and themselves and their work. Also at one point Sharpay starts dating someone and gets really annoying and her friend is like “you’re being annoying” and they get in a fight and Sharpay is like “i don’t even like him that much but i feel like i have to be in a huge romance relationship (bc of troy and gabriella but also Society)” and this eventually leads to her realizing that she’s a lesbian and also that she has an unhealthy view of relatioships. She goes to therapy (it takes her a really long time to go but once she realizes she gets to talk abt herself she is more willing). Important that she does not date her friend (her emotional support system) but she does eventually get a gf. It takes her a long time to figure out how to be a good girlfriend and that her professional ambitions are different than her personal ambitions (she’s used to treating her relationships like a business instead of a two-sided thing where there needs to be emotional connection and both people being like vulnerable w each other)

Her and Ryan having space from each other where he can shine by himself and she feels like she doesn’t have to upstage him all the time. He feels for a long time that he can’t rely on her bc she’s a mess but eventually he texts her like 16 times in a row abt a person in his program he’s really annoyed at and she’s like “oh my god he’s ruining your show you Have to talk to the director!!!!” and it’s really helpful to just talk it out w her even if he doesn’t take her advice. It’s helpful for him to realize that it is a problem and he’s not overreacting but also that he should not take things to the extremes that Sharpay does lol. He should not poison this person. They eventually fall into a good & more balanced sibling relationship where they can rely on each other for a certain subset of things but they aren’t the only people in each others’ lives

Ryan meets other gay guys at Juliard who tell him that his hats are bad and show him how to dress not like an idiot. They’re like “it’s ok buddy. I know you were the only out guy at your high school but you don’t need to do that”. He’ll like. Do fine in college! He’s like fairly confident in his abilities and identity & good at like. Balancing career & personal life. He’s fine enough at school and doing well in his theater things. He’s charismatic and makes more good friends. He “formally comes out” to his parents in like a big thing. He choreographs it and makes Kelsey write him a song to sing. His parents are like “well we knew that but did you have to make it this much of a thing” and he’s like “yes”. His mom is generally more accepting than his dad and his dad is like “please don’t talk about this to the people at the country club” and he’s like “i… wasn’t? I don’t know these people. They’re your friends”

After college Ryan gets famous before Sharpay does and generally has a good thing going wrt doing choreography for “really important things” (he isn’t public facing)-- he’s good at choreo and also good at working with divas (thanks Sharpay i love u). He gets Sharpay a good role in a thing but he makes a big deal like “I got you an audition i didn’t get u the part u did it all yourself :)” but he totally got her the part lol in that he recommended her. She does a rlly good job tho (obvs) and does well in the spotlight bc she;s actually like. Hardworking and driven and good at musical theater. Her Big Break is in like a movie adaptation of a musical. She’s Glinda when they finally make a Wicked movie. The choreography is really good bc Ryan does it

Taylor tries to become a politician but slowly realizes that her passion for being an activist doesn’t super align with that and figures out that she wants to enact social change without like. Being a part of the system. She has a youtube channel where she talks about social issues and wears her stupid sweater vests & ties. Also she dates someone who likes women. Before she was invested in the public-facing aspect of the relationship and she learns what it means to actually have private moments of caring & how to not follow a stereotypical relationship and instead to do like. What she actually wants to. She’s bi and she dates a woman and enjoys not having societal expectations wrt how relationships are supposed to go. She dates a guy and realizes that a m/f relationship also doesn’t have to conform to societal expectations. Both are super important experiences for her even if neither are “endgame” (i love u matty)

Chad is heartbroken after Troy goes to a different school but tries to hide it/is in denial. He kind of lashes out at people who want to make friends with him and goes into a depression spiral. He eventually snaps out of it when Sharpay (who is still going to UA at this point) is like “what’s your problem?? Anyway i started going to therapy and it helped actually. Toodles!” and he’s like “what the fuck just happened” but he makes an appointment. The first session he’s like “hwatever this is stupid idk why i’m here. Whatever” and the therapist is like “yeah. Okay.” but he eventually opens up and then like. Learns to see himself as not part of a friendship or group/team and see himself as an individual. He gets over Troy, which takes him a while but he does it & we’re proud of him <3 it also takes a while to make friends who he can be emotionally vulnerable around bc he’s never really had that type of relationship before (bc he and troy are very guys being dudes & he like. Wasn’t super close w Taylor as they were p much just a relationship for show). He makes friends w both some guys and girls who aren’t all on the basketball team and has friends from lots of different places. This process takes him like. All of college.

Chad doesn’t date anyone in college and afterwards it’s super awkward bc it’s like the first time he’s actually dating someone. He ran into Ryan and they have a talk where Ryan’s like “you could’ve been my first love but you were never really emotionally available bc u were in love w a straight guy and also not confident in the fact that u are gay. Like that summer was fun but it wasn’t real” and chad is like “oh”. Ryan was like in a serious relationship at that point but didn’t mention it bc he didn’t want to feel like he was rubbing it in lol. And then Chad thinks about things. This is like during a Thanksgiving break while still in college. Chad eventually dates a guy who understands how it’s like. Hard to be gay and figuring out relationships and stuff at different life stages.

Kelsey gets negative feedback for the first time and freaks out but eventually learns that a prof who only gives positive feedback when she deserves it is good actually. She incorporates criticism and starts to write songs that don’t suck. She continues to wear awful outfits. She has a nice girlfriend who also wears awful outfits. They are an awful annoying couple but they’re happy. They do annoying theater kid things

Ms Darbus realizes that it’s bad to force her students to completely write & choreograph their own shows and stops pouring her entire life into high school theater and fixes her problems with her “legal domestic partner” whom she was feuding with

Zeke realizes that he likes Sharpay in the same way he likes celebrities and that isn’t a crush. He makes plenty of friends in college bc everyone loves a guy who brings baked goods to places. He continues doing basketball & baking as hobbies but neither is a career & he finds passion elsewhere. He loves doing whatever he’s currently doing but doesn’t have like a Thing he wants to do forever and it takes him a while to find a forever career. He ends up teaching a variety of classes at community college and is happy doing that but also he might not do that forever. He comes to terms with his “contentment w the transience of life” and is like “if i’m happy doing what i’m doing now then that’s good enough for now”. He serves as a good contrast to all of the super driven people who know exactly where they want to be (gabriella, sharpay, ryan)

We did it. we fixed high school musical

[starkissr]

idk why

ppl want to be fake friends like i’d rather have real friends or no friends but i don’t get why ??? ppl rly wanna try n be my fake friend like no listen i’m sorry but i can’t be ur friend on the day u feel lonely n a stranger when ur thriving and omg!!!! this one rly just told me my expectations are too high bc get this! i asked her to consider me like o ok lol so you’re rly telling me in ur twisted idea of a friend I’m not allowed to expect u to care abt me like isn’t that only the literal definition of a friend my mistake??? bc i totally get having no expectations of ppl and all that but at the end of the day when ur then best friend decides to ignore ur existence then come back into ur life whenever they feel like it? like my problem isn’t that ur trying to come back into my life i’m open to whatever ok but when u can’t have consistent intentions to be a good friend u auto = fake aka nobody ???? i GET that ppl mess up obv i’m not perfect either but it’s just admitting that and actually understanding where u went wrong n at least making an honest effort of not doing it again that is SO CRUCIAL

wow wow wojeofiae and like it’s just soooo funny when ur pride is the fucking reason we’re not friends??? like if ur ego is what’s holding u back i rly don’t need someone so easily swayed by that bs in my life? so no i’m not gonna try or give a fuck abt u if ur idea of a friend is not aligned w mine like and if it isn’t that’s fine we don’t have to be friends uk but like idk it sucks tbh bc i’ve been sooo transparent abt how ur lack of words/actions hurt me so bad so u literally know but don’t do anything w this knowledge??? n still wanna try and talk to me like we’re friends after?? fuck no

it’s sad that 2 of my absolute best friends did this to me in diff ways but like this is the underlying pattern n it just hurts so bad when the person ur the closest to in the world and has learned the most abt u and has been thru sooo many ups and downs just one day decides that ur not important to them anymore uk??? like and when they come back later bc of c that’s what they always fucking do! they expect it to be like the old days and make u feel like ur fucking crazy for being hurt when they literally just left u in the dark. it was so painful to grieve thru that period without u bc i had to feel what it was like when u turned ur back on me and yes it was v fucking cold bc when i was ur friend it was all sunny days n that was a stark contrast but 

also these past few days rly just make me wanna ask u why tf are u so fucking bipolar and a passive aggressive cunt to me one second and talking to me in ur bubbly tone like im ur friend legitimately 2 seconds later bc oh u just remembered u can use me for this thing or that??? i’ve literally never met an angrier or immature person? like ok obv i’m just off one on this rant so i’m gonna explain just how this girl tried me today! so she’s my roommate n keep in mind like i have told her explicitly my problem w her is that she hurt me when she didn’t communicate w me n went mia like i said this multiple times so no guess work needed n anyway today i was playing music in our room and guess what this girl does!!! puts her music on louder than mine! at first i was like?????????????? literally what? LIKE DID U RLY!!!!!!!!! JUST DO THAT LOL it was rly too much for u to tell me u wanted to play ur music???? i was honestly amazed and was like ok like obv this just sounds like shit at this pt n tbh all i wanted to do was just ask u why u felt that u didn’t want to tell me u wanted to play ur music? but then i checked myself and remembered ur words that i am expecting too much of u when i ask why u don’t care to communicate certain things so i guess it’s too much to ask u this too so like what now? n i just turned my music off after this internal resolution that u literally told me i can’t expect anything from u aka i can’t ever expect u to show up for me so like who is someone to u that is there one day and not the next?? like a relationship needs a degree of stable commitment and if i can never count on u why would i want to waste my time waiting on u to fuck up / my breath for calling u my friend? 

the ppl i’m lucky enough to call my friends are ppl that i’m inspired by and i’m not saying ur an ugly person like obv u have parts of u that are so beautiful and that’s who i saw in u before but like if u keep showing me how ugly u can be don’t blame me if u singlehandedly broke my trust in u ??? AND ANYWAY LOL if ur reading this still the CHERRY on top of it all and what actually got me fucking mad is this !!!! girl!!!! asked me for a bandaid a breath after i turned my music off. like. o. ... .m. . . m. g. i just honestly couldn’t believe it n w her cheery ass tone like this is what i’m talking abt how u only matter to them when they need u!!! i was debating asking her abt the music thing now that she decided i was worth speaking to but literally it just wasn’t worth it to hear another one of ur excuses??? i would’ve loved to see what u would’ve twisted out of that situation tbh but i was also like ok like i don’t wanna help u bc ur a cunt but then i was like uk what! she wins if i’m a bitter person bc of her by telling her no so i let her have my stupid bandaid but talk to me like we’re friends one more time and i swear to fucking god !!!!! i won’t be so silent 

n my friends are like r u gonna be friends w her after n i’m like ? what friend treats a friend like this ????????? like real q? this is not a friend. why would i say yeah i’ll be friends w her just to make her happy? no bitch my one requirement to be my friend is to act like a fucking friend and if u tell me that’s expecting too much of u like ok but u have to understand! this is my definition of a friend i can’t be ur friend then ! stop half ass trying!!!!!! either leave me tf alone or the moment u choose to decide (and actually act like) u wanna be real to me is when i consider u my friend again uk!! i’m not gonna hold ur shit over ur head but idk i feel like it’s bc they think that i will that they don’t try or honestly i don’t know their reason why but all i do know is there’s a blatant discrepancy between their words and their actions. for both of them but like the one who did this to me first even apologized to me and like i honestly rly appreciated that like it was only! a year and a half late lol but still i was happy but then they went ahead and did them and i haven’t heard of them since! like ok COOL so u just wanted to say we’re friends then go away again like that’s what i’m saying i don’t get it why do ppl want to be fake friends? what’s the pt????????? wow ok these are just the questions that i’m asking myself rn it like tears me apart that the ppl who know me best can’t bother to act like my friend when they wanna still have the perks of calling me a friend ! literally if any of them were to hit me up and put an attempt that lasts o idk beyond a single day to be my friend then i’m down i’m there but don’t fucking tell me i have high expectations for thinking ur my friend yeah obv i’m rly frustrated at everyone for complicating everything like clearly i care so much abt these ppl and that’s why i’m hell bent on trying to make myself feel ok for not taking them back bc as much as i love them i have self respect and literally it would just become an emotionally abusive relationship if i try to engage in a friendship where the friend would just let me down every day like i already have my own shit i’m dealing w why tf would i want to put myself thru unnecessary pain?

like everyone knows when ur being genuine or not. the recent one gave me a fake apology and it was so clear it was fake and last night she even admitted that it was n that she doesn’t think she needs to apologize and like i’m just like ......... so let’s just say i forgot that u can’t stick to ur word ok.... did u rly just have to remind me again?! this is what i’m talking abt it’s just painful and i can’t be ur friend if u can’t be real w me ok that’s all if anyone wants to be a human w me say hi like i rly don’t think anyone reads this so i was gonna delete my tumblr so long ago bc like whats the pt if no one sees u but then i realized how fucking cool that is and how liberating it is to just like put ur thoughts out into the interweb like journal writing is cool n all but on the off chance someone other than me does happen to see this then hi ur only looking at my deepest thoughts so i might as well know who u r lol but like if not (prob) then that’s ok i’ll just lol at myself when i reread this later! as stressful as this is like omg i’m graduating next week and i won’t have these kinda petty problems anymore and like that’s cool when that happens but idk i’m just not ready to grad f m u so ik as like annoying as this is and as stressed as i am abt my classes and assignments and finals and the future i’m eternally grateful for my education n like that’s why i don’t wanna leave! it’s the little things like tn i was at a coffee shop studying w friends n in the car ride back me n one of them were talking abt that one cute barista like he doesn’t matter but having someone to just say whatever the fuck u want w n confide in! it’s these little pleasures that i just love so much!!! n like i didn’t even notice but my friend brought to my attn like how he was acting kinda dumbstruck when he was talking to us n i was like lol fuck ur right that’s fucking hilarious n i had a new thing to laugh abt that i wouldn’t have if i had experienced it alone uk! like talking is literally what allows a relationship to flourish so w these 2 ppl where they just don’t communicate w me like that sounds like such a small flaw but the reason why it’s such a problem is that it literally stunts the friendships growth! how can we connect and etc if u can’t share what’s rly going on w me??????? or like why do u feel u don’t need to talk abt the truth?????? but ya as i was saying lol it’s ok i’ll just have to grind until i can get into my next school (hopefully, someone take me pls lol sos) but ya idk i suffer a lot during school but tbh it’s my fav ever so i’m so sad i’m graduating!!!!!! but like the only thing that’s making it ok is bc all of us are saying the same thing and it’s comforting that even tho we all dk what the fuck is going on i’m not the only one 

so mostly sad bc i’m gonna miss my real friends here soooooooo much like w all my heart omg nothing will be the same again and i’m not ready! i’ll miss being seconds away and the fact that i can go over or call them like hoe get ready bc we’re going to the beach that’s down the street!!!! at my parents place the beach is half an hour away and i was in love but u had to drive like an extra 15-30 min to get to even nicer beaches n bruh let me tell u i rly did myself right by going to a school an actual 5 seconds away from the beach and granted besides us students it’s a rich white conservative person area but still it’s in a cute n clean area?? omg like this is just as good as it gets uk??? so ya blessed to be stressed 

!?!?@#

[amillionsmiles]

end of year fic meme

tagged by @hailkuvira ; thanks so much, this was fun! (and inspired me to bust out the excel spreadsheets, LOL)

tagging @spacetravels , @sp4c3-0ddity , @anakkin , @leejinkih  + anyone else who would like to have fun w. this

STATS:

Fics posted:

Tumblr exclusives: just going to direct to my masterlists tag, tbh

FF.Net: like we’re made of starlight (TATBILB, 2148 words) are you having fun yet? (i’ll send you the sunset)  (Big Hero 6, 9302 words)

Archive of Our Own: just the lonely talking (The Last Jedi, 1521 words) dj got us falling in love again (Voltron, 5342 words) want your bad romance (Voltron, 2010 words) your hair was long when we first met (Voltron, 7339 words) quantum mechanics, smirks, and other complications of the universe (Voltron, 2501 words) is that a hermit crab in your pocket or are you just happy to see me? (Voltron, 1840 words) you’re deriving me crazy (Voltron, 6928 words) in the nook of a cousin universe (Voltron, 13441 words) head in the game (Voltron, 7804 words) The Future’s Open Wide (Voltron, 14500 words) you only live forever in the lights you make (Voltron, 1485 words) come out your way (Scarlet Heart Ryeo, 3446 words)

Total number: 14, plus tumblr Total word count: 89,174 

Ship/Character breakdown: Ship breakdown: for Voltron, 14 Plance, 6 Sheith, 1 Hance. Big Hero 6 was my usual Tomadashi, TATBILB was Covinsky, The Last Jedi was just Tico sisters feelings, so Gen. Character breakdown: Lots of Pidge, Keith, Lance, and Shiro POVs

Characters that had the main focus: My fave Pidge got a lot of spotlight this year, and I wrote more Lance POV than I thought I would, which was fun!  Besides that, Keith gets the narrator role for most of my Sheith fics, per usual.

Specifics:

Best/worst title? Best title: I’m not even ashamed to admit it because I have the humor of a teenage boy, but is that a hermit crab in your pocket or are you just happy to see me? was definitely my favorite, though it loses some points for being a mouthful, I guess. 2nd place would go to you’re deriving me crazy for the three-way pun. Worst title: come out your way is kind of nebulous I guess

Best/worst first line? Best: i am become blade     “A knife is a close-range weapon.  This is the first thing Keith learns, before the Garrison, before Voltron, before the Blade.”

Worst: welp, this is making me realize that almost all my fics start with just a single line of dialogue. I guess are you having fun yet? (i’ll send you the sunset) which just begins with: “I’m here! I’m here!” Best/worst last line? Best: you only live forever in the lights you make

“Sorry,” murmurs Shiro, but there’s little remorse in it, just a smile pressed against Keith’s temple, a buzzer going off in Keith’s head.  A knee between his legs, their bodies aligning, and Keith thinks of that moment of grace when he releases the ball from his hands, watching it arc away from him with a held breath—and when Shiro finally, finally kisses him, it’s bleachers full of people rising to their feet, the thunderous roar of a crowd, the sweetest of sighs as the ball tumbles, headlong, through the net. 

In case anyone hasn’t picked up on it yet, my heart will always beat for basketball and I think this paragraph really captures the feeling it gives, plus the Sheith kiss doesn’t hurt :’) 

Worst: come out your way       “And she smiles back.” I mean, it works for the two characters and where they are at this specific moment, but it’s not particularly insightful or creative, so I do wish I could have done a little more.

General questions:

Looking back, did you write more fics than you thought you would this year, less than you thought, or about what you predicted? I think more! I thought it would be much more slow-going because of college, but going through this reflection has made me realize that I still managed to squeeze stuff in when I got bitten by the writing bug. 

What pairing/genre/fandom did you write that you would never have predicted last year? God, this was the year of the Plance Plance Revolution. I remember @flusteredkeith texting me about Plance in like May or something of this year and at the time I was still like “oh that sounds cute” but probs wouldn’t actively ship it myself but now.... here we are....  oh worm What’s your favorite story this year? Not the most popular, but the one that makes you the happiest. My entire ball’s in your court verse, tbh, particularly the Pidge and Lance segments. More to come! :) 

Okay, NOW your most popular story. On tumblr, hold it against me got the most notes. On Ao3, in the nook of a cousin universe has the most hits and bookmarks, while hermit crab has the most kudos.

Story most underappreciated by the universe? My Hunk/Lance Sky High AU, tbh. I had so much fun writing it and was a little sad to see it sent off into the void, but Hance is a rarepair to begin with so I guess that was to be expected.

Story that could have been better? just the lonely talking; I really want to do more with the Tico sisters and their backstories but tbh I’m still not as informed about the Star Wars-verse as I’d like to be so a lot of the fic was just *waves hands*  Maybe another time I’ll take a different stab at it.

Sexiest story? I’m vanilla af but I guess things get semi-steamy at the end of hermit crab, if you ignore the fact that the entire fic reads like a shitpost  Saddest story? in the nook of a cousin universe. I mean, it’s a Kimi no na Wa AU, so that was kind of a given ;) Most fun? want your bad romance far and away. spin classes are something else, y’all Story with single sweetest moment? you’re deriving me crazy wins hands-down for best snuggles and cuddles all around. 

Raising an eyebrow, Lance smirks, moving to the edge of her bed.  Feet planted on the carpet, he pats his knee.

“C’mere.”

“What are you trying to do?” Pidge asks suspiciously, but she goes anyways.

“Nothing.” Feigning innocence, Lance hooks her by the belt loops, pulling her closer into the cradle of his hips.  His legs bracket her on either side, and she laces her fingers behind his neck, waiting.  It’s an old game between them, this process of making him come to her; Lance tilts his head back, smiling, and Pidge rolls her eyes, bending a little to meet him—

—only for him to snake an arm around her waist and tip her sideways onto the bed.

“Lance!” yelps Pidge, her bedsprings squeaking under their weight as they fall onto the mattress.  She means to say more—something about how he’s a dirty sneak, but that gets swallowed by laughter when he starts tickling her, going straight for her neck.

“I—hate—you,” she gasps, squirming as she tries to bat his hands away.  Eventually, she manages to get a leg around his middle and rolls them over, though Pidge suspects it only happens so easily because Lance is happy to yield.  She ends up sitting on his waist, his chest rising and falling gently under her hands.

Hardest story to write? in the nook of a cousin universe, bc plotting was hell, and then also by virtue of it being a commission I felt doubly self-conscious about everything. But it was worth it in the end :)

Easiest/most fun story to write? want your bad romance because half of it happened to me in real life

Did any stories shift your perceptions of the characters? My Hunk/Lance Sky High AU actually got me to see how the Hunk/Keith dynamic could play out, surprisingly, which was a fun revelation to have. And then writing Pidge/Lance has made me fall back in love with Lance as a character, just realizing how genuinely good and fun and sweet he is.  

Most overdue story? are you having fun yet? (i’ll send you the sunset)  This fic had literally been languishing in my drafts for over a year and a half, and that’s not counting the first seeds of inspiration for it, which had been around way before that. It felt really good to finally get it done. :)

Did you take any writing risks this year? What did you learn from them? This summer was the first time I opened myself up to commissions, and I was pleasantly surprised and honored by the response, so maybe I’ll make it an every summer thing.  I think taking commissions definitely taught me to approach writing with more discipline, which was nice.  I also branched more into “crack” fic and found it extremely enjoyable, so here’s to more of those.

What are your fic writing goals for next year?

Take more writing prompts, and train myself to treat them as prompts instead of feeling the need to develop a whole full-length fic around it.

Finish your hair was long when we first met

Write more rarepairs for Voltron (heith and kidge are next on my list)

Start my Hogwarts series 

Basketball-verse Plance Part 3 B)

[survivorwakea]

Episode 8: “from now on i’m doing whatever the fuck I want.” - Asya

kind of a good thing i didnt vote this round because people dont know where i stand in everything

it seems to be facebook vs tumblr but fuck that bc i genuinely dont trust most of the tumblr people and id hope that if i jump on the facebook train that they'll take me into their community AND into their alliance if i become sheepy enough and stop socializing with people so i seem like an ftc goat. lets see what happens :)

I JUST WANNA REALLY QUICKLY RIGHT NOW APOLOGISE TO ELMO FOR THE LONG ASS CONFESSIONAL I MADE A FEW DAYS AGO WHEN I DOUBTED HIM. I WAS VERY VERY PARANOID AND THOUGHT LITERALLY EVERYONE IN THIS GAME WAS GONNA BE AGAINST ME AND I THOUGHT ELMO WAS PROBABLY GONNA BE IN THERE AS WELL JUST TO BE PETTY BECAUSE IM A DUMB BITCH OKAY I FEEL REALLY FUCKING BAD ABOUT IT ELMO PLEASE DO NOT HATE ME I ADORE U SO SO MUCH OH MY GOD

i’m like genuinely irritated lmao like i can’t even talk to these people i’m so mad.

i felt so bad lying to chloe and writing her name down when i genuinely just wanted to work with her in the merge. and these fucking Freaks were so sure that lily and anabel would vote her and it would be fine so i said okay. then what happened? one of those two flipped. i should’ve voted lily last night just to send a message. from now on i’m doing whatever the fuck i want cause fuck these people

Omgggggggg. I’m livinggggggggg. After completely flopping the last round I’m just so happy that I know That I’m safe. I’m trying to figure out how to navigate the rest of the game and I think it’s about damn time that I get an alliance going. Or at least have myself talk with everyone and make sure we can agree on a vote because if I’m in the minority again and either Johnny or Jared go home I’m a goner. I’m really hoping I can find a way to work with Elmo and Ben for the rest of the game as well. I think if I could be in an alliance with all of them I may just be able to make it far in this game. Also Chloe I’m sorry for voting for you last round. It’s honestly because of how iconic you are and I hope you can forgive me Queen.

WHEW what a night this has been. Ben decides to make an alliance chat with me, Elmo, Zack and Justin. Okay sure I guess this is happening now. We all be sharing idol guesses with him as well. It's called Anabel's angels, which is kinda funny since she's not in it but apparently Ben does not trust her to not leak it. I also had Jared speak to me and say he wont come for me this round if I don't go for him, I mean sure, I wasn't gonna go for you yet anyway so if this helps to take the target off me for once then fine. But he also mentioned that he spoke to Ben who said he wanted to work with me, which led Jared to say he would be open to as well. It leaves me questioning the bond between Jared and Ben. Not something I'm going to freak about just yet, but will be kept in mind. And I also had a chat with Zack about how I feel I'm being overshadowed a bit right now and a bit stuck. Justin is definitely in a power position right now and I think he knows, everyone sort of knows it, just no one from the alliance really wants to say it out of fear that he will then target him. I do think Justin needs to go soon, he's far too much of a threat the closer the end gets and I feel he definitely will be one of the first to at least attempt to make a move. I feel my first move should be to turn on Justin and if I pitch myself right I really think I could get it to work. Shame though because as a person I adore him, I just don't want him to start running this show too much and then be left scrambling to try to get him out near the end. To finish it all off, Lily has messaged me and said she wants to work with me this round after being totally inactive today. She gave a not fantastic apology compared to the others and did not give me a single reason as to why she voted me. Asya, yet to message me. @ both of them ~ hit the bricks bitch.

I wanna say that I'm really glad for Elmo, Zack and Ben and the fact I know them all. I had a not fantastic time today but tonight we called nd played some roblox, or at least I listened to them because my roblox wouldn't connect. I had so much fun and I feel it did bring us closer as a group and it was something I really needed. So ya I love these guys so so much, they deserve the world and I hope we have more roblox calls to come <3 <3 <3

https://soundcloud.com/bodhi-small/week8/s-0GitL

honestly feeling like my number is up. i don’t know i just have that icky feeling that i’m joining joey tonight.

i threw around the idea of throwing johnny utb to save my own skin, since he was very Loud last round abt his legacy advantage (which i’m starting to think he didn’t? actually? play? idk i wasn’t at tribal but i watched part of it and i don’t think there was any indication that he played the advantage) but idk how to feel about that. like if i did it would purely be out of self preservation, and not with the hope that he’d will me the advantage he may or may not have faked playing the other night. but anyways i don’t see myself lasting long regardless with the way things are. in a more fluid merge i’d be less worried, but i feel like there are capital s Sides and i’m on the wrong one

and chloe will have definitely told her allies i’m a lying rat by now. i wish i could talk to her but i’m Baby and if anyone is just a little bit mean to me right now i will legit burst into tears

my people still don’t have a name and honestly i don’t have one to throw out. the last time i did i was wholly ignored and it blew up in our faces. now that person has immunity and we don’t have the numbers. i don’t know i cant think about this anymore or i’m gonna concuss myself

"Hey Elmo? wanna vote Bodhi?"

"Not yet"

Oh we doing this again. I see you.

ugh. it's getting to the point where i literally can't deal with these people anymore. even the people i'm working with are getting on my damn near last nerve. the only person i've talked to about how i'm genuinely feeling, is chloe. i can't tell elmo and justin how i'm feeling because it's clear as day at how close they are and it's even more clear about how close they are with people outside of our alliance. and i'm glad when i talked to chloe, she felt the same way. everyone we're aligned with are so vocal and want to be in power so it's gonna clash soon i feel like. i don't want elmo and justin to think they're controlling everything and think i'm gonna just be in the background. i will be in the background for this vote though because it seems like justin is the one being in everyone's pm's trying to figure out how they're voting. and hopefully i'm not the only one who see's that and people start to realize how power hungry he really is. so i'll let him do all that right now and let him pick this vote and then when the time comes, people can think he was running it all and if it needs to be done, i'll drop hints here and there about it. i can't help but feel some typa way because i'm seeing it all with my own eyes and i don't think i'm over thinking it. elmo is close with jared and probably has multiple side deals. elmo and justin are closer then they're putting off. justin and johnny are close and justin seems to be trying to talk to everyone so.. all i know is, i need to start making side deals and talking to a lot of other people, and chloe agrees she's gonna do the same. so after this round, i think we're gonna try and get 2 step aheads and start focusing on the future of this game so we can try and have one over on them.. because i know this isn't gonna last.

haha so remember when i lied to jared and bodhi and asya and lily and voted joey out.. well.. perhaps i am now lying to elmo and ben and justin and zack and chloe and voting justin

________________________________________________________________

why am i LYING so much in this game. is it impossible for me to just. be HONEST. apparently it is bc there’s not one person ive been completely honest w... even johnny..... oopsies!!!!!

sorry this is a short one but everyone has agreed on asya but im almost like sure that its a fake plan and im NOT SURE IF I SHOULD PLAY MY IDOL OR NOT BECAUSE IM SO WORRIED HISDFHISDF BUT I DONT WANNA MISPLAY IT? I ALSO DONT THINK THEY SHOULD BE COMING FOR ME...

god im nervous jsdfoij

This is a last minute confessional im legit at tribal rn I think im going home. it was too quiet all day and I dislike what Bodhi has just said. I feel uncomfortable and sick. If I go home then I go home but I will be a bitter jury member.

this vote was going to be ben, but i tried to get it to split. ive workede pretty hard at this and maybe it’ll work.

________________________________________________________________

Justin is voted out 7-4. He becomes the second member of the jury.

[survivor-themyscira-blog]

ok so first of all i am sorry for not participating in the challenge !! i had fall break vaca and was super busy but anyways ~ hi im loving this cast so far and i am so glad that i get to play with some new faces! & also some old ones too. im just going to do a brief cast assessment rn so i can record my thoughts on everyone initially:

emily - i love her so much! she is super sweet and i think she is going to be super invested and great at this game which means she could be a potentially strong ally for me moving forward! we have chatted a lot and i really like her andreas - literally havent spoken a word to him yet so we will see .... ian - pharmaCY KING! i was able to bond with him a lot and i think that we have the potential to have a very good dynamic, but it needs to grow organically jordan pines - i have played a few games with him before and he is such an amazing ally as long as he thinks he can beat you in the end. with him i always try to play dumb and act like im bobo the fool [even tho like 50% of the time i actually am bobo the fool so it isnt a full on act] and let him think that he controls my votes so im hoping that works in my favor again lily - no comment honestly i don't care for her and would love to vote her out but idk if i am going to get a wise opportunity for that madeline - she seems super sweet and also she has a really strong personality which i like but we haven't been good about replying to eachother so far so we will see what happens moving forward, id really like to work w her and get to know her better kai - i literally love kai he is so sweet and kind and perfect and i hope we finally get the chance to work together in this game bc we have tried and failed so many times in a row so fingers crossed! rhone - rhone is so fun! i have wanted to play a game w them for the longest time bc they are so iconic and smart strategically. i have hosted and played with them before so i think i have a good insight as to how they play the game. i'd love to work with rhone moving forward toph - toph,,,,ok so coming into this game i was nervous about toph because he is such a crackedt and forward player from past experiences but in my last game i was kind of mean to him so i genuinely apologized to him bc i do feel bad bc im p sure he is much younger than me and honestly i was a little shit when i was his age so if he does decide to forgive me id love to work something out with him the bottom line is that i am down for anything with this game. i always make it my thing to work with people i have never worked with before so hopefully that can happen woo! also i feel like now im an easy vote off since i didnt participate in the challenge so hopefully i can work that to my advantage and make people think im a person who is just a number and a sheep for now. until next time!

I'm SO ready for a tribe swap.  I like my tribe mates but I'm just wondering how hard they are going to try to go in the future ughhhh

CHARLOTTE IS A MEANIE SHE PRETENDS TO LIKE ME BUT THEN SHE DOESNT GIVE ME AN ADVANTAGE AND LAUGHS AT ME

Alrighty! Im way to tired ro film anything and im watching the office so whoops not my problem! Im just kidding lol! So right now as per usual i feel like my game is going to be extremely paranoid which I learned to from my queen Emily in azore I SEE YOU QUEEN. The last time me and her played together i was way to ott and now im more calm and reserved. I feel paranoid right now as to what the hell this dang twist could be!! And i feel like im at the bottom of the totem pool here on this tribe. I’ve been chatting with everyone which is good but jordan pines scares me so much and i know we have to keep him for awhile, I really don’t know how to feel about other people right now. I like nicholas and i can actually talk to him now since ff but i think if ruthie from there tribe survivers and me and emily survive we could be a killer squad. I think jordan pines is the most scariest things on this tribe every because he is so intense and in your face if  you like it or not and its scary. I feel like there already are alliances formed and im scared as fuck by that. Im just going to keep my foot tapping and praying to the jesus that there are no majority alliances former already. Jordan pines can lead an army and that scares me so if I don’t get close with him im screwed man! Rhone dosnt really respond to me so I kinda feel like he might not like me. Lily seems cool and i really Like madelin but Tophily is here to play and float a bloody way to the end lol! Lying isn’t a strong suit of mine so im going to not lie unless im talking to the person going home. I glad we won immunity because I won’t be going anywhere and not be a first boot. My goal Right now is jury but i have to go one day at a a time and take It SLOWWW! Lol!! With this immunity challenge no one can do it so i think i will have to and im okay with that but if we lose and they start blaming me for losing im sorry I actually don’t have a life to live while you guys do! So im just gonna bite my tongue because i have a shit ton of liquids in my fridge which is a plus for us lol!! My family of 6 is now a blessing? Like what the heck!! So there's my thoughts for today and the past day. Im just going to relax watch the office and wait for my Prince Charming to come out! Lol! Whatever happens in this game. Oh fuck wait! i have some tea to spill and you will be quaking in your loafers! So i was doing the puzzle for the idol ajd Someone already found it! I was shook! And Emily is now getting an advantage while ill be snuggled up like a bug in log that’s being tugged on by a slug! That made no sense LOL! Okay now i think all my thoughts are out for now but who knows ill be screaming in my head about not saying something soon lol! And with that and my future boyfriend goodnight and farwell!

https://m.popkey.co/8a68bf/Ao9Xg_s-200x150.gif It's probably a good thing that I have the super idol. Literally no one is talking to me. I'm a little annoyed because I've done pretty much nothing wrong, except not submit for the challenge?? I guess Jack's influence that not doing a challenge is pretty strong over this tribe. Hm. Although I have this idol, there's no guarantee that I'll ever have to use it, and honestly if I go to tribal it's probably best for me that it doesn't become a priority to play it. I really don't want to play it if I don't have to, because the tribe could easily just vote me out the next chance they get. I also told Raymond about the "regular" idol hunt I did today, where he could jump off the cliff and get a number or whatever it was that I did exactly, and he was like "LETS GO ON CALL" but like... I was playing Roblox so Skype 10/10 wasn't gonna let me do a call properly. So I was like... sorry bud but just go search anyways! And he never messaged me back, so I have no clue whether he did or not. Right now, I trust Raymond a lot. I don't know how I feel about Madison or Dan. Amanda is a nice woman, I really wish I had a better relationship with her though. I don't trust Logan (and I know Logan doesn't trust me) and I don't like Jack all that much, unfortunately. I figure that someone is gonna go after me -- potentially Logan. Logan and I have a history of playing games together and while I never once wronged him (at least not by my knowledge?!) he doesn't ever want to trust me in games. There's literally no point in even bothering playing with him because he doesn't like playing with me all that much. But I know Logan would be united against players that I don't get along with, like Nicholas and Jordan Pines. Those two would be my most desired boots from the other tribe just because there's no chance I'd ever align with or trust either of them, plus Jordan has made the end of this series so many damn times already and it's maddening. My personal goal this season is to make it to 9th place. I got 11th last time but I want to break into single digits, a very rare occurrence for me. Like obviously I'm winning this season, but I wanna set some small goals just to make the journey to finals a little less treacherous. Anywho, I think this confessional is long and boring enough. I'm gonna go talk to Jack and see if anything happens. Maybe I can try to understand him a little better, lol

Sorry I've been a bit quiet so far uni took over but it's the weekend and I can catch up. The tribe seem ok, really quiet though not really what I am used to. I found the challenge hard as I didn't really have any time and there was like nothing DC around, guess the UK is a marvel fan! I'm shocked that JG had to go, I love him to bits and was looking forward to working with him but he has his reasons. Hopefully the next challenge will be better for us

Heyyyy sunshines~~~ Just a quick one. I still don't know a bunch of people on my tribe, but I got to chat a bit with Madeline and Tosh. Life is good. I'm pretty sure that somebody already found an idol inside a library book, but I can't tell who it was so whatever :) I can't participate in the next challenge sadly, but that's life. I am taking the social game a lot slower this time around and I feel much better as well now. There's no need to try too hard. I am a bit concerned that I am in touch with too few people, but we shall see about that. JG got eliminated, which makes me sad. Not much to talk about rn. Cya soon!

This game has been pretty exciting so far! It hasn't been like most survivor games where I'm in a rush to talk with everyone in case they decide to murder me in cold blood, so that's nice. I still feel like I'm going to get murdered in cold blood, but it's whatever. My tribe is pretty nice so far, though I'm not the biggest Toph fan and Nicholas seems to be nonexistent. Everything's great otherwise, though. My one idol search had me getting caught by the guards, and I'm honestly not too eager to go out and search again. It'd arouse too much suspicion towards me.

I hate you Charlotte for what you made me do. Not drink those drinks, but that was my last snack pack! You owe me pudding. My fellow competitors Madeline and Toph have earned so much of my respect for doing that challenge too!

If someone has already submitted this then just ignore me It’s the anti-antilopes vs the lit hippos

ALL I KNOW IF MY ASS BETTER NOT GET VOTES OUT AFTER DRINKING THAT VILE ASS CONCOCTION YALL HAD ME DRINK LIKE IM GOING TO BE BURPING A1 SAUCE ALL GOD DAMN WEEK. But like low key jack tho really 1:32......? You lucky I like you bro

Okay, real confession. I think Billy might come for me, but he won't if he's smart. I'm good at contributing to challenges in the tribal phase. Don't fucking touch me. That being said, I don't want billy out. I think Jaiden should go. He won't be helpful, he's not social, I'm not into it. I love him, I do, but as long as he's here, we might as well keep losing. The other option is Amanda. While she's sweet, she's never online, which is understandable, you know? She has kids, she has uni, etc, but that's... not valuable to me at this point in the game. I need to win, I need to escape this tribe alive, I need to not be seeing the VL again ANYTIME soon.

I LOVE THE HIPPOS!!!!!! HUNGRY HUNGRY HIPPOS

Okay so here’s the deal, I like everyone on our tribe. I guess. Billy can be annoying but he’s going through a lot so I can’t ask people to vote him out. Idfk, all I know is these basic hoes couldn’t win this damn challenge? Worse has been in my mouth than honey, bbq sauce, and water and I wasn’t complaining!!!!

I’m Logan talking in the tribe chat but flat out ignoring my messages. Yeah, I think I might get votes tomorrow, but the only way it’ll come out is if myself or Billy receive the majority. The reason why I’d play it on Billy is simply because I feel like I can trust the guy, and not to mention he also has been preoccupied with a freaking funeral, like... what heartless monster votes him out after that? Hopefully I DON’T have to play it, but I’m ready and willing to play it if I have to.

thanks JAIDEN for saying you didn't know I was in this game why would you do that. You make me look either inactive or like I'm stuck up or something UGHHHHSDFJSLDF

Jadien

can i just...idol abbey out of this CHAT?

We Hippos won immunity, Yay. It's good because I haven't quite found my footing in this tribe, I didn't want to compete but everyone was asking to not compete so I might as well step up and do it, I'm not one to shy away from a good challenge, especially when people are, should give me staying power right? At least I did it. I digress, A swap is coming in the next round or two, I can feel it. I need to continue to play as my sweet friendly self, cause deep down I am that guy. My main worry is that when the swap happens I might get targeted buy members of that damn Antelope tribe. My plan to remain consistent but not over the top in challenges might have gotten a little hindered by this on since I did compete. Raymond needs to be premerge booted, the guy killed it in this challenge and we don't need a comp beast going forward. I'll cross my finger he gets got soon. As for life on the Hippo Tribe, I have still kept my clue to the idol secret, if I happen to find it then I might share the clue with someone. If I find it, I sooo want to idol out the person I shared the clue with, this hero archetype player can be a villain given the opportunity. Madeline is cool, she's nice, but she is a talker. Talkers make me hungry, I think my game can benefit by keeping her close and dropping her when I need to. Rhone is cool, started talking to me about sports but I'd vote him out. Nicholas is probably on the menu for our first boot at tribal cause he's MIA at the moment but I want to keep us immune until I have a chance to work with him. Toph, I could take or leave, same with Emily. They don't impress me much. Kai and Andreas, I love ya dudes but you do seem like sheep for the slaughter this game, Andreas less so. JORDAN PINES PUBLIC ENEMY NUMBER 1. I am curious to see how far this snake can go or if I'm a mounted trophy on his wall or if I can mount him on my wall.

https://youtu.be/NxdOnwnLLeE

OHHHHHH FUCK ME SIDEWISE, I accidentally sent the real clue to Madeline instead of the fake one I had written up.

Oh god I'm making meninist moves and a meninist alliance. The VL is going to hate me

Okay this is a proper quiet tribe you've got here, so not used to this! So I am going to have to do what I didn't want to do and take control of tonights vote... wish me luck.

Amanda about to get her ass beat by this vote. I'm a rat, I'm a snake, I'm a roach. But her ass is grass WHEW. I just don't want Jaiden to go because I actually talk to him. This is MENINISM, but *SHRUGS this is TRUMP'S AMERICA

Okay Amanda got to go tho, this hoe is messaging me saying all this shit about how Jaiden isn't going home because of some advantage he has. Bitch you're the one going home so I'm confused. I'm just gonna sit here with Cheetoh dust on my fingers and watch this all go down. I mean I could for sure go home, which would be so fucking funny, but like I'm just gonna be #Confident, thanks Demi Lovato

OKAY I KNOW THIS IS LIKE THE THIRD ONE IN 15 MINUTES BUT AMANDA IS ON TO ME, AND NOW I'M SHOOK. I talked to way too many people about this plan and I think it's backfiring lol Oh well, I think she'll be going tonight regardless, if not it's been real lmao

So my name has come up, but I also have a little trick up my sleeve called the Themyscira Oasis! Basically, I’m telling Amanda that I’m going to be playing my Oasis on myself tonight in order to avoid being voted out. Then she spills literally all the insight behind alliances, inner workings of multiple relationships, and so on, just so she can blow her game up on her way out the door. However, I don’t WANT Amanda to go home. In fact, I’d rather blow up my own game in order to ensure that someone in my corner stays in the game. Amanda is actually trying to save me, regardless of if I use the oasis or not tonight. I’m telling her that I’m using it no matter what, when in actuality I don’t have it to begin with. My target right now is actually slowly shifting from Logan to Dan, because I just don’t have a whole ton of trust with him just yet. I’d rather keep the devil I know (Logan) around because I can always prepare for what he’s gonna do next. I can’t predict anything with Dan because I’ve never met him before. As Amanda pointed out, Dan herself and Ruthie are clearly working together because they had a “group think” moment where they came up with my name as the vote to go home. She didn’t say specifically who brought my name up, but that it was a process of elimination which makes sense imo. Anyways I was mid-way writing everything and Logan and Dan called me stupid and crazy, and that’s the story of how I told Amanda they were gunning for her. So now I’m going to blow everything up, publicly, because I have nothing left to lose. I said I wasn’t gonna be a mess this season but I’m back into my old habits, I suppose 🤷🏼‍♂️ Sound the alarm, Hurricane Jaiden has made landfall!

me after that blow up made absolutely no sense but I’m still working it https://78.media.tumblr.com/5d766478fb350acbddd66160284749ba/tumblr_o7887f1gRR1sdmszbo1_400.gif

Apparently Logan thinks he's in danger? And so does Jaiden? But everyone's voting Amanda? God I hate premerge.

today has been so wild all I know is that this ENTIRE TRIBE is full of snakes and I have to watch what I tell ANYONE cause it will get back to the other people.  Amanda told Jaiden that Dan and I said his name but UMM, she gave us TWO OPTIONS. but now things I'm telling Jaiden are getting back to LOGAN and Dan is going around telling Billy everything I say and this is just wild these people are crazy and no one knows how to keep their freaking mouth SHUT! I want to find a ride or die I can tell anything too but that can't happen if they're going to keep comparing notes.

So I trusted Jaiden and voted Dan. Is that a bad thing? Probably not considering I heard he was throwing my name out there. I'm kind of glad he's gone, he always does well and then never wants to work with me. So bye :* time to get serious, I need to prove to everyone I'm here to play this time.

https://youtu.be/Slv3EzWZjuU

NOW THAT'S A FUCKIN' TRIBAL! Super good for my game, even though I would've kind of liked to work with Dan, because Amanda still remains a major target, and now Jaiden has made himself a much bigger target. Combine that with me getting closer to Raymond and Logan because of this? A big win in my book.

"Actually, wait... I am gonna play my super idol on Amanda" https://thumbs.gfycat.com/SnarlingDarkLarva-max-1mb.gif Oops, sorry Dan

WHAT THE FUCK, JAIDEN?  WHAT? WHAT WAS THE POINT OF THAT. I keep telling him 'ooooh hehe it's fine, it's fine' but like WHAT now Amanda is going to hate me, and just ugh I hope the announcement is a tribe swap get me away from these people they talk about what each other say too much. I can see why he wanted to use it but WHY DAN?

https://youtu.be/dQw4w9WgXcQ

Jaiden has thrown that shade stick out and I'm very cautious about him now. Tho he tells me that it wasn't an attack to me or anything but like...if we're close why wouldn't you tell me what you're going to do. Low key just bummed out. That bastard.

---

THIS WAS ALSO THE ROUND THE HOSTS STARTED DOING ROUND TABLES TO TALK ABOUT THE GAME. HERE IS EPISODE ONE!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yP0-OZFvxfc