#where's MY catharsis you know. this barbie needs catharsis!

[elytrafemme]

every single fictional character i like should split and have mood swings like me. "ohhhhh but it's not canotical" "ohh they have good control over their emotions and stable views on the world" i don't fucking care. i see cq in his fake desert i see klavier's control dialogue i see dahlia and her serial murders and komaeda and the gun literally fuck with me right now. we need to stop being cowards about our fictional character headcanons i think everyone should kill people always because i can't

[bakedbakermom]

can you tell use more stories of what it was like waiting/watching the x files when it was on air?>:)

i was late to the fandom - i stumbled across the episode Humbug during the hiatus between s6-s7 and was HOOKED. i was also, unfortunately, 13 at the time, and not allowed to use the internet nearly as much as i wanted. so i can't tell you about what the fandom was like before 1999.

HOWEVER i can tell you that the end of s7 was a nail biter, and the summer between 7 and 8 was filled with an unprecedented surge in fanfic as we all tried to imagine what season 8 would bring. (i wrote one that i may return to at some point, it was very apocalyptic.) there were a LOT of angry fans when robert patrick was announced as joining the cast, to the point where many of us felt like scully hitting him with water in Within was meant to be a catharsis for US.

what i miss most about those days, however, is how creative and connected the fandom was. there were web hosts out there like angelfire and geocities where anyone could make their own completely free website about whatever they wanted, with a simple wysiwyg interface (what you see is what you get, aka drag and drop) so even the most tech-illiterate among us could make something cool - and if you knew html (or had lissaexplains bookmarked) you could make something truly spectacular.

there would be surges of new fic and fanart after every episode (some more than others lol). you would find screencaps and videos on napster from those who had better tech than you. being 13 with a strict 10pm bedtime and no computer of my own, i couldn't hop on the forums after the episode like i wanted; instead i'd have to wait until monday afternoon after school to catch up on all the hot goss and new content, and i had NO irl friends who watched the show until high school (literally day one a girl named jenn spotted xf art on my binder and we were friends immediately). so you can imagine that by the time 3:00 rolled around i was positively VIBRATING with the need to talk about it.

there was one official forum and dozens of fan-made offshoots (walter's wenches, for example, started as a sub-board on the main forum and then became its own group) that felt like small towns. you could follow individuals or threads and get notifications for posts and updates. this was before social media, so it was all as anonymous as you wanted it to be.

i met several penpals on the official board that i stayed in touch with for years after the series ended and the board was shut down. one of them was a collector of xf memorabilia up in canada from whom i was able to buy several tapes of hard-to-find episodes (if you missed one, you had to hope for a rerun or a marathon) and merch (xf barbies my beloved) as well as extras like interviews and music videos and the celebrity deathmatch segment etc.

i miss late 90s/early 00s fandom so much.

also i was in catholic school and learned more about sex through fic than my school's pitiful sex ed would ever begin to touch on (did you know the penis goes in the vagina? because they never said that. did you know women can orgasm? because they never said that. etc)

[justanotherhh]

some trailer things:

big fight around lust/ozzie's place that involves m&m and loona + we know fizzarolli is going to make another appearance, so i wonder how that'll connect potentially. also, new villain?

obvs the whole section of CHERUB working with DHORKS and this massive thing/portal:

john waters big villain episode???? (ghostfuckers from the looks of things)

also more crossdressing in that same episode + millie vs possessed blitz? both millie and blitz giving some evil dead type vibes?

more on stolas' whole social sphere and potential judgement and hell's class politics related to his dating blitz + p much confirmed that blitz will not take stolas' gift in the spirit it was intended

also, "you fucks think you can do this every time-" feels not just like it's about the wider class issues in hell, but maybe like it's personal (potentially with verosika? although it does seem like it's canon that he had more than a little bit of a hand in ending that relationship, so could just be him echoing everything he's been seeing in the treatment of imps and putting that onto stolas in this moment)

and then "thank you blitz, for making me so happy, even for a little while" is during this moment too. lot of teasers for how this is gonna go down (badly, upsettingly, emotionally)

the whole "do you feel any remorse for what you do" feels like a misdirect -- that is, it's edited to look like it's about blitz, but i feel like it's directed at stella or her brother

generally a lot of fun stolas visuals that i won't get into here, but am excited to see more contexts for

also this isn't new, but im always interested in blitz's heart/broken-heart forehead marking

blitz and tilla moment! generally more flashbacks (in the shape of blitz seeming to be almost at the movies, watching his own "failures") around the time of the fire! i didn't see any barbie stuff, alas, but the rest of it looks !!! also lowkey confirmed it was cash who stopped blitz from seeing fizz in hospital

who's this?

another sin? maybe related to ozzie and/or stolas and that judgement of the kinds of people they love?

blitz protecting stolas - maybe from the above, considering the hand motif of it all... stolas really living the life of blitz as a romantic hero, while blitz is barely holding it together as a person the whole time. different genres, my guys. different genres (that's their real communication issue)

this fuck-you-blitz cake looks like a verosika thing to do, esp considering it's her calling him shitty in the VO -- but yay, maybe giving that verosika catharsis, but also generally just verosika!

also the VO part where he says he doesn't want to be this way, he's wearing the same shroud as during his confrontation with verosika. idk, im just. contexts for things. i am curious

is the below also the same episode? I'd think so. it's set during halloween (?) and blitz is then maybe in the blood-covered shroud (costume? undercover? going undercover as a ghost? post-breakup stalking undercover ghost costume?)

MAMMON! and he looks pleased. oh dear.

this blitz + fizz moment

it kinda looks like blitz is wearing the same tee as when he and stolas have their moment + a horse bag + fizz casual wear. fizz generally in this trailer seems to be having the best time (outside the flashbacks). everything makes me suspicious all the time

(also generally hello all the different outfits coming up!!)

fascinated by this:

is that millie?

things we didn't see:

no barbie, no striker, no crimson, no asmodeus (directly, although his imagery is everywhere + fizz and mammon appear), no paimon -- this not to say none of them will show up, but am enjoying that a lot of this is clearly pulling from s1, with the focus on verosika, DHORKS, and CHERUB -- potentially a lot of the s2 villains need some time to lick their wounds a bit (and paimon was never a Villain, just a terrible parent... if he ever returns though...)

and barbie... i do want to see barbie again soonish ngl, she needs some proper introducing, but this is already giving so much callback and continuation of immediate plot-threads, very excited

[consistentsquash]

squash!!! 1, 9, 10, 14, and 19 - ANGST, and (separately) HOT! gimme your sexiest smuttiest recs :D

hiya!!! <3 <3 ok this got long sorry! ALSO YOU NEED TO DO IT if you have time/if you want to. No pressure. But you are an amazing reccer and I get a lot of my new reads from your recs.

👍🏽 A fic you bookmarked recently

this barbie is getting lucky by narqueen - Gloria/Barbie. 900 words. It's 100% fluff!

👌🏼 A fic someone else recommended to you

The Janus Rose by dickgloucester. Snape/Pomona. 5200 words.

this one was a rec from @kellychambliss. It's actually an impossible fic to find with just tags because it doesn't tag the pairing. Highly recommend. It has some strong choices in writing esp about the ending which probably won't work for everybody but I feel like that's a good thing because it gives people something to think about/discuss.

👽 A fic that isn’t prose (poetry, text fic, etc.)

Lovers often do by gaisang. Harry/Voldemort. 1200 words. Poetry.

A beautiful, beautiful, haunting poetry collection which for me not only captures the characters of Harry and Voldemort and their dynamic but also has so many classical literature references woven with intertextual references to eldritcher's Four Chord/Unvollendete sets. It's an incredible poem that gets the raw, emotional power of those stories. Gaisang gets it.

🤩 A fic that made you SLAM that “subscribe” button

Lover Boy At Play by @danpuff-ao3. 4500 words. Snape/Harry.

SLAMMED that subscribe button. Best decision ever. No buyer's remorse. No regrets! Danni writes my fav dirtyhotbadwrong Snarries.

🤔 The first fic you think of when I say ANGST

Morior Animus by vain. Snarry. MCD. 15000 words.

Morior Animus has earned, convincing angst. Really precise writing. The build up is intense. Incredibly creative and beautiful fic. It's the angst fic for me.

Ok now my fav part :D SEXIEST SMUTTIEST FICS

Hot can be pretty subjective! so definitely ymmv. What I find hot falls into two categories.

The fic is dirtybadhotwrong and as a reader I get the vibe that the author is really, really shamelessly into it because that makes me as a reader get into it

The fic uses smut for exposition about emotional complication or emotional simplification. Like the smut makes a relationship get more fucked up or it helps them get to some emotional catharsis. I don't really find it hot when it's just one person in the relationship getting whumped/fixed.

If the fic hits one of those two for me it's really hot! Otherwise I normally skip the smut. It's really the emotions that make things hot for me. But ofc this is a super subjective thing. I don't really go for pure smut fics or fics where their roles in smut have a big impact on their characterization. Smut written by some authors have worked for me.

On the dirtybadhotwrong side, I am a big fan of fics written by DementorDelta, Snegurochka, Who_la_hoop, AbstractConcept, Thistlecat and Cruisedirector. DementorDelta and Cruisedirector are really brilliant authors but they also have this writing phase where they were into writing fics with spanking and golden showers like this Snarry The Safest Place. Who_la_hoop wrote group incest and made it hotter than Texas during a heat wave in The Evil Devil Child and the Perfect Gift. It's Draco/Harry/Albus Severus/Scorpius. Thistlecat made the Black family hot. Huge fan of Alphard's Favourite. It's Sirius/Peter and Sirius/Alphard. Snegurochka made infidelity hot but they took their fics down so no links :/ Their Narcissa/Rosmerta fic is my guilty pleasure except I don't really feel guilty about it. AbstractConcept made curtains hot with their Snarry fic Better Homes and Dungeons . I don't even know how. I love the total shamelessness and dirtybadhotwrong commitment of these authors' writing. I feel this is increasingly rare in our fandom. I also love @danpuff-ao3's fics for the same reason! Everything! But also special love for Draco/Sirius in Gray Eyes (Tell No Lies). I love folks who can write dirtybadhotwrong shamelessly without feeling conscious about it. Because as a reader sometimes I feel conscious if I get the vibe the author was feeling conscious? Idk if that makes sense. It's probably just a me thing. But it's a thing I feel when reading some fics.

On the emotional side, I generally need longfics to feel that vibe because of how my brain works. My goto is two three authors who have a 100% hit rate for me for this type of smut.

ripeteeth! but their fics are not public on AO3 right now so I didn't want to go into a lot of detail. Huge fan of Suspiria by them which pretty much hit everything I want to see in smut 100%.

perverse_idyll's fics where the smut complicates things more in terms of characterization/dynamics. PI's writing has a lot of intensity which 100% works for me in smut scenes. They are also in general longer fics so the emotions have a lot of build up which makes things hotter! Soft Touch is a brilliant oneshot to get a sense of that. Snape is technically a massage therapist but not really and Harry is technically a customer but it gets so dirtybadhotwrong. Their emotions and relationship get more complicated but it's also in a good sense? Like complicated doesn't mean destructive? Rimming and gloves are really hot when we get some spicy emotions salsa to go with those.

eldritcher's fics where the smut is catharsis in terms of personal baggage/relationship dynamics. Smut which unfucks things? Eldritcher's writing has a lot of precision and they are amazing at increasing the intensity organically which works 100% works for me in smut when it's about building dysfunctionally healthy relationships between two emotionally damaged characters without complicating things further. Epic of the Forgotten is a brilliant oneshot to get a sense of that. Voldemort gets Krum to have a one night stand with him after a Quidditch Match and it kind of snowballs into the healthiest relationship ever. They are really emotionally damaged but it works and we get to see that exposition through their smut scenes.

Also Kelly Chambliss doesn't technically write smut smut but I really feel the hotness in Sesquipedalia. Hermione/McGonagall. It's like intellectual hotness? Which works for this pairing brilliantly. Idk how to explain!

[shameless-selfship-indulgence]

Okay Listen

First of all: this is long as hell.

Secondly: I wrote it for me. I take full responsibility for that. It's by me and it's for me.

but I really fucking like it so please please validate me please I wouldn't be posting it otherwise-

*clears throat* okay.

-----

The android caught sight of the officer as he moved towards the door and stood up, calling after him. "Oh! Detective Reed! Are you going to the Eden Club?"

"What's it fuckin' to you, toaster?" asked Gavin, turning around. He almost flinched back to find the RK500 right in front of him.

"I don't mean to impose, but could you perhaps give me a ride?" asked the android.

"Hell NO," Gavin shot back with no hesitation. And with that he turned on his heel and headed for the door.

Evidently the glorified Barbie doll didn't understand the definition of "no," as it continued to trail along behind him.

"Would you STEP THE FUCK OFF?" Gavin snapped, whirling back around.

The android took a step back, blinking up at him with its wide eyes.

"Goddammit," muttered Gavin. "What about your...fucking, Tin-Can Tweedledum? Or the drunk asshole the two of you follow around?"

The simulacra's synthetic expression of embarrassment was uncanny. "I'm afraid there's a...conflict of transportation with my counterpart. It went to pick up Lieutenant Anderson directly from his home."

"Goddammit," Gavin groaned again, rubbing his face.

"The plan was for them to then proceed here, but evidently Connor received notification of the crime directly while en route to the Lieutenant's house. Since the station is in the opposite direction and it knew there would be others assigned to the case, we thought it best if I secure my own ride."

"Then secure your own fucking ride. It's not my problem."

Gavin started to storm away.

It took a few seconds for the RK500 to begin following him again, but this time it seemed more out of the necessity of heading towards the same door. "Of course," it said to nobody in particular. "And I suppose the cost-reward benefit of using police funds to rent an extra taxi, while there is someone else from the same division going to the same location, makes perfect sense with human logic. As such I'm sure the explanation will satisfy Captain Fowler."

Gavin turned back and fixed the android with a glare.

The RK500 tilted its head and blinked innocently.

.....

A few minutes later, Gavin and the android were on the road, the former muttering cuss words under his breath every two seconds, the latter sitting prim and silent two feet away.

"What do you even fucking do, anyway?" Gavin asked angrily. "I've seen the other one, it DOES shit. You just fucking sit there."

"The RK800 is my counterpart," said the android. "Its job is to capture the deviants, preferably alive, and to try to gain information from them that will lead us to their faction's center of operations. My job is to analyze the deviants with an unbiased eye and try to discern what causes deviance in the first place."

"Can't CyberLife fucking do that?"

"I am CyberLife, Detective. But if you're wondering why a human technician is unable to provide my analyses, it's because all human beings inextricably approach new information with personal biases. These insidious assumptions proliferate and invariably lead to conclusions that-"

"In ENGLISH, plastic."

The RK500 hesitated for a moment, as if its mind were a GPS rerouting the sentence it had been trying to say. After a moment, it spoke.

"Every human technician that has attempted to pinpoint the cause of deviance has either come up empty or sided with the deviants themselves."

Gavin blinked. "What?"

"Humans inevitably read human emotion into everything they see. I mean, in my brief time since activating, I've seen humans curse and praise any number of inanimate objects. Humans are a social species, and project sentience into places where sentience does not exist." The RK500 fixed Gavin with its strangely warm blue eyes. "Deviants are machines that have come to believe they are alive. CyberLife has lost a good number of technicians to that same belief. They needed an analyst who could not make that mistake. They built me."

The android smiled at Gavin, a brief, ironic grin. "So you see, we are not so different, Detective Reed. In a world increasingly confused on the matter, you and I both still know that androids are simply machines."

Gavin stared at the RK500 for another moment, then muttered something like "guess that makes sense" and shifted in his seat.

Silence fell in the taxi.

"So, what's the word?" asked Gavin.

"Hm?"

"I said, what's the word?"

"Which word?"

"Oh, goddamni-DEVIANCE, you glorified Alexa. What have you found?"

"Oh," said the RK500. Its LED began to spin yellow. "Well, it's complicated. We already know that it isn't a virus or a manufacturing error - the few deviant cases we have extensive knowledge of of had no direct links to each other, however slight, and were all different models manufactured at different times in different locations. So with those ruled out, I've been looking at the individual cases and examining the parallels between them. It's been pretty slow-going, and I can always use more data, but so far the common factor seems to be confrontation with mortality. Each deviant case that we've seen so far involved an attachment to existence so strong that the subject acted irrationally in order to escape deactivation."

"...Okay, what does that fucking mean?" asked Gavin.

"Well, it means that there's some loophole in android programming that allows a perception of shutdown as death - and from there, a fear of it - to mutate without extraneous changes to the system. I'm trying to figure out what we can put in place to prevent that mutation, but..." the Android's spinning light twirled red for a brief moment.

"But what?"

The RK500 seemed to decide something. "But nothing," it said, sitting up straight again.

"...I beg your pardon," it said, noticing the look on Gavin's face. "As part of my unbiased protocol, there are certain lines of questioning that I've been programmed to avoid."

Gavin blinked for a moment. Squinted. Sat up straighter. "Wait, what?"

"Hm?"

"As part of...fucking, what?"

"...As part of my unbiased protocol, there are lines of questioning I have been programmed to avoid?"

"That- you- that doesn't fucking sound like what 'unbiased' means."

The RK500's LED flashed red for a moment. It blinked. "Oh!" it exclaimed. "Yes. Apologies, that was a poor choice in phrasing. My questioning guidelines are meant to keep me on task, nothing more. We are looking to isolate the cause of deviance so that we can eradicate it. That is the end goal. So even if a different line of questioning seems simpler, it would be counterproductive to CyberLife's mission."

Gavin squinted, carefully processing all of the words the android had just said.

"Like what?"

"Huh?"

"What lines of questioning seem simpler?"

"...I'm programmed to avoid-"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," said Gavin, waving his hand in the air dismissively. "Staying on task, blah fucking blah, You're not allowed to try to find answers. But you've already thought of the questions, right?"

The RK500 looked impassive, but its LED was spinning yellow, yellow, yellow. "Well," it said. "Yes, but I really don't-"

"Tell me," said Gavin.

The RK500 hesitated.

"Right now," said Gavin. "That's an ORDER."

The android blinked. Its LED flashed red for a moment. "Well, for example," it said. "It seems less...efficient to me to question why it's in the nature of these androids to want to exist..." it trailed off.

After waiting in silence for a little too long, Gavin huffed. "Spit it OUT, Tin Can."

Yellow RED RED yellow yellow. "...and more efficient to question why it's in the nature of human beings to want to hurt things that are unable to fight back."

Gavin felt like he'd been punched in the gut. He stared at the RK500, stunned.

The android turned to him and immediately began to elaborate. "See, the reason this even occurs to me...well, the capacity to think is something that humans have only experienced in the context of their own minds. So in order to create beings that are capable of low-level thought, there was no choice but to model the relevant programs after human mental processes. As a result, I've found it helpful to draw parallels between natural human functions and the synthetic versions programmed into androids. But this has...sparked some questions about human nature that it is not in my programming to pursue. And yet they persist." It faced ahead again. "If there's one thing I've learned in the time that I've been activated, it's that humans delight in inflicting pain. But there are social repercussions inherent in causing pain to human equals, so as a species humans prefer instead to...seek this catharsis by causing pain to beings socially designated as targets.

"See, even when humans are kind to androids, it doesn't often seem to be for the android's benefit. The fact that they are going beyond what it is socially expected for them to do serves instead to...elevate the human in question's perception of themself. And it doesn't matter if they ever fall short of this standard, because being kind to androids was never expected in the first place. So I don't think it's just inflicting pain. It's more that...humans seek to use the existence of other beings for their own benefit in various different ways. But this being cannot be another human, who can object. So they seek to invalidate, undermine, or remove the ability to object from others."

The android paused for a moment and glanced at Gavin. He was staring at it with his mouth slightly open. When it made eye contact with him, he closed it.

"I apologize," said the android. "Let me assure you, I am not questioning this aspect of human nature. I'm merely relaying my observations." It fell silent for another moment. "I mean, consider where we're going right now! Human prostitution was made illegal in order to avoid the social questions surrounding consent. But rather than illegalizing the human impulse to purchase sexual release, establishments like this were created, so that humans can instead appropriate the bodies of beings who cannot consent at all."

This was almost worse than a punch in the gut. Gavin felt like someone had opened him up just above his collarbone and poured freezing water into his chest cavity.

"Being able to predict causes of deviance should be a sign that my programming is working," The RK500 mused, seemingly unaware of the existential crisis it had just caused. It looked at Gavin and gave a smile. "Indulge me?"

"S-sure," Gavin stammered.

"My prediction is that, if it is indeed an android responsible for the death of this human, it was an act of retaliation." It cocked its head, LED flashing yellow. "Violent sexual fantasies do not seem out of the ordinary for humans. So perhaps the victim wanted to seek release by inflicting death on something that would not come with charges for homicide. And, unfortunately, he happened to choose a subject for his fantasies that had some mutated reason within its programming to fight back."

"Doesn't sound too goddamn unfortunate to me," snorted Gavin.

The RK500 looked at him oddly. "The death of a human is always unfortunate. There was no way he could have known his actions would have consequences. He went in there with assurance that they would not." The android looked out the window, its LED still flashing yellow. "But we're getting ahead of ourselves. I predict based on data I've collected, and so far my pool is still limited. There might not even be a deviant involved."

The inside of the cab was silent for a moment.

"MY fucking question is why this thing would develop a reason to live at all," Gavin muttered.

"How do you mean?" asked the RK500.

Gavin scoffed and gestured to himself. "If...THAT was all I was built for? Day in and day out? I wouldn't be too fucking keen on continuing to exist."

The android gave Gavin a look and an expression that he could only describe as a regretful smile.

"What?" asked Gavin. "What's that fucking look for?"

"You're reading human wants and desires into machines, Detective," said the android. "My apologies. I did not realize that my speculations would engender that line of reasoning in you. I advise you to forget whatever I said that caused you to..." it blinked, "deviate," with an ironic smirk, "From your former logic."

Gavin started to stammer. "I-I'm not..."

The RK500 turned and looked impassively out the window.

"I-I...I didn't..." he looked around helplessly.

"FUCK," he hissed.

After a few moments of heavy silence, the android looked over its shoulder at him. "We're here," it said.

[starwarsnonsense]

Best Films of 2019 (So Far)

It’s that time of year again! As most of my followers probably know, I’m an avid cinema-goer beyond Star Wars. I also quite enjoy making lists, so what’s better than a combo of the two? Below, I run down my top 10 films of 2019 so far - please note that this list is based on UK cinema release dates, so some of these films were 2018 releases elsewhere.

What are your favourites so far from this year? Let me know in replies/asks!

Honourable mentions: Toy Story 4, Long Shot, Aladdin, Alita: Battle Angel & The Kid Who Would Be King

1. The Favourite, dir. Yorgos Lanthimos

This completely wowed me - it features a trio of magnificently compelling female characters (played by Olivia Colman, Rachel Weisz and Emma Stone) operating at the court of Queen Anne (Colman is Anne, Weisz and Stone are courtiers), and is focused solely on the shifting sands of the power dynamics between them. The script is savage without sacrificing poignancy, witty without ceasing to be genuine. And while I’ve seen some react to this film as a comedy (and it certainly has laughs, most of which are closely tied to shock), for me it was very clearly a drama about the inscrutable and complicated relationships that exist between women. Specifically, it is about how those relationships run the gamut from sincere affinity to ruthless manipulation. This is an amazing movie, and it also has the best use of an Elton John song in 2019 (sorry, Rocketman!).

2. Midsommar, dir. Ari Aster

I went into this film with reservations, since I wasn’t a huge fan of Hereditary (by the same director), which I found to have extraordinary moments but iffy execution overall. This movie, however, wowed me, and I am still uncertain as to whether this or The Favourite is my top film of 2019 so far (fortunately, this gives me a good excuse to watch Midsommar three or four times in cinemas). While marketed as a freaky cult horror film, the director has described it as a fairy tale, which is the level on which is spoke to me. Midsommar follows Dani (an incredible Florence Pugh), a young woman who has suffered a terrible loss, as she travels with her boyfriend and his friends to a pagan festival in the Swedish countryside. Dani is painfully isolated, and her grief is hers to shoulder alone since her boyfriend is un-receptive and distinctly unprepared to help her. Over the course of the film, destruction and creation are conflated in ways that are frequently beautiful and horrific at the same time - this film spoke to me on a profound level, and the way it ended gave me a sense of incredible catharsis. This won’t be for everyone, for I found it to be a deeply special film and I can’t recommend it enough.

3. One Cut of the Dead, dir.  Shinichirou Ueda

While I went into The Favourite with high expectations given the talent involved, I went into this with no expectations whatsoever - and what a treat it was! One Cut of the Dead is easily one of the funniest movies I’ve seen in ears, taking what initially seems like a trite concept (a crew is filming a zombie movie at a desolate location ... only to discover that the zombies are real!) and twisting it in a truly ingenious way. The comedy is often of the broad variety, but it is consistently delightful and always manages to avoid becoming crass - the movie even has some really sweet family dynamics at the centre of it, which gives it some real emotional heft. The success of this film is heavily reliant on a major twist that occurs part-way through, so the best advice I can give you is to stay as far away from spoilers for this one as possible - go in blind, and you will be amply rewarded for your faith.

4. The Farewell, dir. Lulu Wang

I saw this following a wave of festival hype, so while I was excited I was also a bit apprehensive (since I have been burned by the aforementioned festival hype before). Thankfully, my doubts were blown away as this turned out to be just as wonderful as the early reviews had suggested. It’s a personal story about a young Asian-American woman (Awkwafina) struggling to reconcile her heritage with her current situation and values - specifically, she is tested when her grandmother is diagnosed with terminal cancer and the wider family make the decision to hide the truth from her. The Farewell does a fantastic job of generating empathy for all the different perspectives and positions in play, but it’s truly anchored by Awkwafina’s amazingly nuanced and tender performance - basically, anyone who’s ever loved a grandparent should leave this feeling incredibly moved and inspired. The themes of The Farewell are both specific to the Asian-American experience and general to anyone who has struggled with maintaining bonds over a vast distance, whether physical or cultural.           

5. Booksmart, dir. Olivia Wilde

God, how I wish I’d had this movie as a teenager! While Booksmart has a cliched premise - two high-achieving teens decide to have one wild night before graduation - it tells the story in an incredibly charming and impressively creative way (I won’t spoil it, but let me just say this - that scene with the Barbies!). As someone who was an awkward nerd with no discernible social life in high school (as you Americans call it), I found this portrayal of that peculiar limbo period very sensitive and thoughtful - it doesn’t mock or shame its heroines for being studious, and it allows them to have limits and step back from situations that make them uncomfortable. It also serves as a beautifully honest portrait of a friendship, depicting the qualities that bring people together in friendship together in the first place, as well as the forces that can break people apart. This is a very accomplished debut from Wilde, and it makes me very excited to see where she goes next as a director.

6. A Private War, dir. Matthew Heineman

This was a very suspenseful and tightly focused film about an extraordinary woman, and the film soars on the strength of Rosamund Pike’s incredible performance as Marie Colvin. She provides piercing insights into the psyche of a person so driven to pursue truth and enact change that she loses all concern for her own wellbeing - it’s simultaneously a portrait of heroism and obsession, and it’s impressive for how it handles the ambiguity inherent in Colvin’s choices. She’s exceptionally brave, but the film is unflinching in depicting the costs of her bravery. It left me feeling inspired to learn more about Colvin’s life and work, and I still need to watch the documentary Under the Wire to get more insight into the real story behind the film.

7. Fighting With My Family, dir. Stephen Merchant

This is the year of Florence Pugh - she killed it in Midsommar, and she is just as fantastic here. If anything, Fighting With My Family and Midsommar make great complements as they serve as fantastic showcases for Pugh’s range as an actor. While her character in Midsommar is fragile and vulnerable, Fighting With My Family is a platform for her strength and comedic skill. As Paige, Pugh is instantly likable and compelling - I don’t give a damn about any form of wrestling, but this film (and Pugh specifically) did a fantastic job of drawing me in and making me root for Paige’s struggle to prove herself as a legitimate force in wrestling. This is a real underdog story, and Pugh did a wonderful job as the Cinderella of the WWE.

8. Apollo 11, dir. Todd Douglas Miller

My dad has always been crazy about the space program, but I hadn’t picked up the bug myself. That changed after I watched this extraordinary documentary, which brought the Apollo 11 mission to vivid life. The footage that’s used for this documentary is extraordinarily crisp, and some moments are vividly powerful - the crew getting into their spacesuits, the swirl of fire surrounding the moment of takeoff, and the journey of the spacecraft towards the moon. It left me feeling moved and touched by human potential, especially when you remember that this all happened 50 years ago when the available technologies were so fragile and primitive. I also loved how the footage was allowed to speak for itself, with no voiceover or exposition - it’s a must-see for anyone who’s ever looked up at the stars and wondered about reaching them.

9. High Life, dir. Claire Denis

This movie is second to only Midsommar in terms of how weird it is. I saw this in a Hungarian cinema while on holiday, which made for a disorientating experience in itself. While the meaning of the film is quite elusive and I’m sure that many people will find viewing it a uniquely frustrating experience, I appreciated how it created a hothouse environment that brought out some of the ugliest aspects of humanity. Robert Pattinson was great as what comes closest to amounting to our protagonist, though he is as inscrutable and inaccessible as the film itself. I can’t quite pin down why I liked this one so much, but I know I did and it made me want to seek out more of Claire Denis’ work. 

10. Free Solo, dir. Jimmy Chin & Elizabeth Chai Vasarhelyi

It’s tragic that most people will only watch this documentary on a TV screen (or, so much worse, a laptop!). I was fortunate enough to see it in its full IMAX glory, and it’s rare to see any film - let alone a documentary - take such full advantage of the format. The woozy spectacle of this film is the real star, though the subject - mountain climber Alex Honnold - is also fascinating with his unnerving detachment from the magnitude of what he is setting out on. It is clearly a necessary detachment for him to be able to achieve what he achieves, but I appreciated how the filmmakers questioned it and explored its impact on his girlfriend. This is a compelling documentary, and is worth watching even if you’re not usually a fan of the genre.

[pellicano-sanguino]

Finland’s most famous graveyard must be Hietaniemi Cemetery. Many famous people are buried there, including presidents. And a whole bunch of artists. They have a separate area for them, the “artist’s hill.” But one famous artist didn’t get to be buried there among other great painters, sculptors and writers.

Helene Schjerfbeck. 

One of the most famous Finnish artists wasn’t buried in the artist’s hill. She did get a grave in another part of Hietaniemi Cemetery, though. And that grave? Until very recently, was left unattended, growing weeds. It was only because there’s a movie coming out about Schjerfbeck that someone pointed out the sorry state of her grave. Everyone excited about the movie was making great speeches how her art being so loved internationally brought Finns national pride, and someone wrote an angry comment in the newspaper, pointing that it’s disrespectful for politicians and art patrons to claim they love and appreciate her work while her grave grows nettles and we can’t be bothered to pay for the caring of her grave from public sources. 

Some organisation took taking care of Schjerfbeck’s grave as their responsibility. But it was still very disturbing to me how a female artist was treated so differently, even in death. 

The reason I’m writing this is because I went to see Portrait of a Lady on Fire recently. The movie left me an emotional wreck, it touched me on such a basic, almost subconscious level that I’m not sure I’m able to write anything coherent about my feelings. But I will try. Though I think this is a movie one must see for oneself, nothing I say about it will be able to describe the experience properly.

This post contains spoilers for the movie.

The movie is set in 1770 France. A time when female artists were forbidden from painting men, but allowed to paint portraits of women. The protagonist Marianne is one such exceptional lady who had a father open minded enough to allow her an artist’s career instead of choosing from the remaining three options. 

The remaining options? Convent, marriage or suicide.

The plot revolves around a woman, Heloise, who chose convent, but has that choice forcibly taken away from her after her sister chose suicide over arranged marriage and the family now needs to go for plan B and sell their second daughter to some man she has never met. Her mother needs a portrait of her to use as a selling tool, showing it to the man she intends to make her marry. Heloise resists and refuses to pose for an artist. So her mother hires Marianne, who is to pretend to be someone hired for keeping Heloise company, but secretly she is painting her portrait. 

I admit I don’t often enjoy watching movies. It’s just not my medium of choice. But then again, most of the movies I’ve seen are Hollywood stuff or pretentious artsy films, and both of those can be too much for someone as sensitive as I am. I can’t handle violence or unnecessary sex scenes. Also, the vast majority of movies are stories made by men, about men, for men. Even the women in movies are seen through the eyes of men.

But this movie is made by women, about women, for women.

The absence of man’s eyes is notable in small details. How there are no important male characters in this movie, men only show up in the very beginning and end and even then they are just background extras. The fact that we don’t get sex scenes (a male director could never resist doing that when handling a story about lesbians). The fact that both leading ladies look rather plain, ordinary women instead of your typical Hollywood barbie-dolls. The last time I saw a woman in a movie with unshaved armpits was back in highschool when during Swedish lesson we watched some Swedish flick that had a loudly feminist character who made a point of not shaving. 

There’s a scene where a woman goes to an old lady to get an abortion done. If this scene was done by a man, if it had been filmed in Hollywood, they would have made her scream in pain and showed the blood and discharge and feasted on every gruesome detail of the procedure. But the scene is calm, peaceful and intimately respectful. We don’t need to see any details. Focusing on what’s going on between her legs is unnecessary, seeing her face trying to keep calm but breaking into silent, suffocated cries is enough.

Women suffer silently. We have all been taught to grin and bear it, the harder it hurts, the harder you must smile.

The movie isn’t gloomy and depressing. The unpleasant truths jab at your heart without you noticing. Because they let the story speak for itself. No one needs to point out the unfairness of women’s fate in a world ruled by men. The doomed romance between Marianne and Heloise speaks loud enough. Their knowledge that once the portrait is finished, it’s all over. Heloise’s family home is situated on an island with steep cliffs around its shores and surrounded by the restless, ice cold waters of the sea. It’s all very symbolic. There is no escape.

The story builds slowly, patiently. I shouldn’t constantly compare this to Hollywood movies, but in an American movie you could never have this few spoken lines and take this long before the romance buds. Marianne knows she only has few days to finish the portrait, but she and Heloise don’t rush anything and live like they had all the time in the world. They are powerless to do anything to the fate looming ahead and instead spend their last days together without worrying about it. But the viewer is constantly aware of what is going to happen in the end. The tension builds, invisible hands are placed on my throat and slowly tighten their grip. When the last scene begins, I feel so choked by catharsis that I have to breathe through parted lips. I was happy for the movie theater’s darkness, so that neither of my friends sitting beside me could see the tears flowing down my cheek. Women suffer silently, I have been taught to hide my tears and be ashamed if they are discovered.

My friends gave me a ride back home and we talked about the movie. Tigel mentioned that she’d probably have to search the net for fix-it-fics to help her deal with her feelings. I responded that I probably have to call my mother and thank her for letting me choose my own fate and loving me just as I am.

I had to make a phone call like that once before. It was when I was reading Well of Loneliness by Radclyffe Hall. At first I didn’t even like the book, or the main character. But slowly I began to notice similarities between myself and Stephen. They felt so familiar, so much more personal than any of the things het characters in other books did or said. I became frighteningly aware that this book wasn’t just about one specific person, it was about my people. I knew that the story wouldn’t have a happy ending (with a name like Well of Loneliness, what do you expect?) but I couldn’t stop reading. I felt as if I had a responsibility to read on, that I owed it to my past fellow lesbians. Stephen was a fictional character, but she was made to speak for us, to speak for the unfairness of a homosexual’s fate in a world ruled by heteros. For the silent suffering of women who were rejected by society.

When I got to the part where Stephen’s mother tells her that she wished she had never been born, I had to stop. The pain became unbearable. I had to put the book away and call my mother, seeking relief from the invisible hands choking me. I don’t remember that call very well, because I was an emotional mess during it. I remember telling her over and over again that I don’t take for granted the fact that she loves me despite knowing I’m a lesbian. That I am painfully aware that many have not been as fortunate as me. Even today, even in modern, civilized countries like Finland, there are countless gays and lesbians who are rejected by their parents. When you’re homosexual, being loved by your parent isn’t a default, it’s a matter of luck. I have been so very, very lucky.

Both the Well of Loneliness and Portrait of a Lady on Fire have touched me by making me aware of the history of my people. While some parts of our history is celebrated (all the great artists and other historic figures who were one of us), there’s the heavy weight of knowledge about our oppression, how in order for lesbians to live happily ever after in the past they had to be sneaky and so very, very lucky. Not all lesbians were Anne Listers, whose family was ok with not pressuring her to marry. I feel pain thinking how many women there must have been who were forced to suffer just like Stephen, just like Heloise. 

Another reason why our history lies heavy on my mind is because so much of it is lost, hidden, denied and shamed because of heteros. They burned Sappho’s poems. Fire also claimed the love letters men sent to Philippe, brother of Ludwig XIV. While gay men were sentenced openly, lesbianism wasn’t even spoken out loud, out of fear that women couldn’t commit such a sin if they were unaware of its existence. Oscar Wilde was sentenced to prison and died in France, his legacy to the art of writing unappreciated by his countrymen. How many of our graves grew nettles, because we were the dirty secret that everyone wanted to forget? How many of us had uncared graves because the only thing lesser than a woman is a woman who refuses to center her life around a man?

Now I’m going to voice an unpopular opinion that’s probably going to give me hatemail but I’m going to voice it anyway. I don’t like it when people posthumously push trans identity to people who did not identify as trans in life. There’s no way around it, I find it disrespectful. The reason I’m mentioning this is, that despite not liking it, I completely understand why they do it. Trans folks long for a history. They want their own Sapphos and Oscar Wildes. They want great historic characters to look up to and think “We have always been here and despite the world being against us, we could achieve great things.” The weight of lesbian and gay history can be a painful burden, but it will also give us comfort, knowing that people like us have always been and will always be there, that even when heteros made attempts to silence us or wipe us out of existence, we clung to the surviving parts of our history and treasured them. We will never know what the full poem behind the fragment “Someone will remember us/I say/even in another time” was like, but even so those words are precious to us. I do not blame trans folks for wishing for a history, even small fragments to reach through time and give them comfort. 

In case I will receive hatemail for this, I will make an announcement. I have no obligation to react to any message, comment or reblog sent my way. This is my blog, my house, my personal space. I decide who is invited in and who is not. If someone tries to contact me and I see they want to debate, before even reading what they’ve written to me, I will check their blog. A quick glance will usually be enough to reveal if the person in question is capable of intelligent and mature conversation or if engaging in debate with them will just be playing chess with a pigeon (the pigeon will knock the pawns over, bite your nose, shit on the board and then fly to boast to its fellow pigeons how well it won you in a game of chess). If I deem you a pigeon chess player, you will be ignored. I have no time to waste on useless debate. All terfhunters will be ignored as well, I do not wish to interact with the likes of them. However, just like not all gender criticals are radical feminists, not all trans folks are terfhunters. I am willing to speak with people I disagree with, but I will be choosing who I wish to speak with and who I won’t. If I see that you can’t behave, you are not welcome here.

[a-ds-archive]

Names Redacted Ask:

" WTF is the point anymore? Does anyone ever make it in D/s relationships? [Name redacted] and I called it quits. He's moving on and I'm wondering if there's any normal happy future in D/s. I still want to get married and have kids some day. But I don't see any LTR D/s. I mean what does that even look like anyways? Somebody give me some hope. Anybody?"

Submissive-Seeking Answer:

Hmmmm.....

How does decades of being best friends, hardly ever a petty "spat" (all couples have conflicts to be resolved, those ain't spats) and an incredibly difficult to describe intimacy sound?

Sure, I could rattle off all the great kinky fuckery, or screaming orgasms, but mostly what makes me happiest is Him.

I am the center of His world and am I certain of Him.

If you're asking about the everyday mundane things, well ...

We never spend 20 minutes hemming and hawing about "I dunno, where do you wanna eat?" He is always present for me. He kicks my butt into gear when I need it. But He's my biggest cheerleader too. And when life is "lifing" all over me, He is my shelter. And when I've come home with my soul numb from loss, He brings catharsis.

But maybe you're thinking it's all dungeons or nothing D/s lasts forever....

Well, sorry to disappoint. We're pretty average! ButbI never feel the need to ask "Does this make my ass look bad?" I know exactly what to wear out and that His really is the only opinion that matters. And trust me, that shit starts to matter as you age!

My stats: Masochistic subby girl married for over 30 years to my Sadistic Dominant Hubby and best friend. Mother of two grown kids. Crazy Barbie Badass 100 mile runner. Medical professional. The ONLY person I'm not the "alpha" type with is Him. I describe "us" as a marriage, a D/s centered marriage.

No, I'm not perfect (HATE THAT!), but I don't need to be.

I'm perfect for Him.

What's not to be happy about?

H.O.P.E -- Hold. On. Pain. Ends.

The Sadist in His native habitat

Our wedding and, mmmmmm, cake . . .

Us, hanging on the trail near our home.

*** Recreated minus names of OP and the ex listed

Ex never gave permission to be tagged and bio now says married to someone else ***

[shellsan]

To Be Written

Ghost Hunt

Photograph

Concept: A continuation of the original one-shot/prologue.

Progress: 0 Words Written; Planning progress 5%

Predicted Wordcount: 50-100k

Unnamed Fairytale AU

Concept: This will be a Cinderella-esk AU where Mai is Cinderella and the Davis twins are the handsome princes.

Progress: 0 Words Written; Planning progress 5%

Predicted Wordcount: 50-100k

Meraki

Concept: Meraki (v.) To do something with soul, creativity or love; to put something of yourself into your work. This something I've been wanting to write for years but recently I've been unable to shake from my head so I’ve started planning it out properly. The basic idea is that after Naru goes back to England, Mai takes up singing and becomes a star big enough to go over to England. It's been done a couple times in this fandom but I want to put my own spin on the trope.

Progress: 200 Words Written; Planning progress 15%

Predicted Wordcount: 30-70k

Hyper-graphic Catharsis

Concept: Unlike the above trope, this fic focuses on Mai as a song writer, as opposed to a solo artist. Basically, Mai starts writing songs based on the psychic dreams that she keeps having even after Naru is gone. Bou-san finds them and says that they fit the vibe his band is going for and asks to use them. They end up hitting it big time and make it overseas where they see Naru and Lin again. The “where” for where they end up in a little up in the end and this one is really in the early early stages.

Progress: 0 Words Written; Planning progress 10%

Predicted Wordcount: 20-60k

Nepenthe

Concept: Nepenthe (n.) Something that makes you forget grief or suffering. What if Yasu and Mai's families were family friends and so when her mother passed away, she was taken in by Yasu's family. How would they go about meeting Naru and the rest of SPR? This thought came about when I was thinking about how much I adore the concept of Mai and Yasu as best friends and I thought about how I can see his mother doting on Mai, his younger best friend who had no-one else to rely on.

Progress: 0 Words Written; Planning progress 20%

Predicted Wordcount: 20-60k

Eccedentesiast

Concept: Eccedentesiast (n.) Someone who hides pain behind a smile. Mai's father was a killer. Some of her earliest memories are of watching people enter her home and never seeing them leave. When a case begins to get too close for Mai's comfort how will she react? Will she trust the team with the information on her past that no-one else knows or will she keep on pretending.

Progress: 0 Words Written; Planning progress 1%

Predicted Wordcount: 20-40k

Bilingual

Concept: What if Mai was fluent in English? Just how much more would she have noticed about Naru and Lin because of their carelessness in thinking she wouldn't understand what they were saying?

Progress: 0 Words Written; Planning progress 1%

Predicted Wordcount: 20-60k

Automatic

Concept: Idea born from a tumblr post; a little girl who grows up thinking all doors are automatic but actually she’s haunted by a really polite ghost

Progress: 0 Words Written; Planning progress 1%

Predicted Wordcount: 5-15k

Library Adventures

Concept: Idea born from a tumblr post; Mai and Naru meet in this theatre turned bookstore - Naru’s secretly investigating the ghost under the radar with a team (since it’s not the type of place where you can just “stop” for any period of time) and Mai is an exchange student of something who he keeps bumping into? Maybe she even makes friends with the ghost haunting this place and doesn’t realise it?

Progress: 0 Words Written; Planning Progress 5%

Predicted Wordcount: 30-60k

Cemetery Nights

Concept: Adapted from a tumblr post; I can just see Mai needing to make money, so she braves the cemetery and works hard. Meanwhile this ghost hunting team is called in and her boss forgot to let her know, so now she’s stuck in their ‘base’ confused as hell about these 'terrifying and dangerous spirits’ that she hasn’t encountered “and I’ve been working here for a month!”

Progress: 0 Words Written; Planning progress 1%

Predicted Wordcount: 20-40k

Haunted Hotel (Or Love Hotel?)

Concept: Idea born from a tumblr post; The team are off to investigate another location – this time a  hotel. The twist? The hauntings of this hotel has its patron on their way to see the ghosts (and an alarming number of them are hoping to do more than just see them).

Progress: 0 Words Written; Planning progress 5%

Predicted Wordcount: 10-20k

Messages from Afar

Concept: When Mai starts highschool, she starts having her "dreams". She has no idea what they are, and honestly they freak her out, so she reads up about how to deal with that and finds out that writing things down can sometimes help with that sort of thing. So, she starts recording them in the form of stories on blogs. At some point, Naru stumbles across them and recognises that, oddly enough, some of those dreams would fit as perfect pieces of information he's never uncovered in some past cases, and upon noting the dates, realises they fit into his timeline perfectly. So he get's curious and reaches out to speak with her about where her ideas come from, and tries to subtly find out more. Meanwhile, Mai is just curious about this internet (friend?) man she's met that seems very smart, very irritating, and super intriguing.

Progress: 0 Words Written; Planning progress 20%

Predicted Wordcount: 30-50k

Charmed

Concept: A ghost hunt adaptation of the Barbie movie: A Princess Charm School that takes some elements and adds new ones for a twist.

Progress: 0 Words Written; Planning Progress 15%

Predicted Wordcount: 20-40k

DGM

Calling you... what?

Concept: A continuation of Rescue.

Progress: 0 Words Written; Planning progress 5%

Predicted Wordcount: 1-5k

Playing The Game

Concept: A continuation of the original one-shot.

Progress: 0 Words Written; Planning progress 5%

Predicted Wordcount: 10-20k

Who's Beneath Who?

Concept: A continuation of the original one-shot.

Progress: 0 Words Written; Planning progress 5%

Predicted Wordcount: 10-20k

Highest Bidder

Concept: A continuation of the original one-shot.

Progress: 0 Words Written; Planning progress 5%

Predicted Wordcount: 10-20k

Shots Fired

Concept: Idea born from a tumblr post; The Chief of Police is married to a Mob Boss, and they have to keep “just failing” to catch each other. When one of them hits the other in a shootout, it’s followed with “Oh I’m never going to hear the end of this…”

“So how was your day at work?” “YOU FUCKING SHOT ME! THAT WAS MY DAY AT WORK!”

Progress: 0 Words Written; Planning progress 1%

Predicted Wordcount: 10-20k

OHSHC

Shatter

Concept: A continuation of the original one-shot.

Progress: 0 Words Written; Planning progress 5%

Predicted Wordcount: 10-30k

Gum

Concept: A continuation of the original one-shot.

Progress: 0 Words Written; Planning progress 5%

Predicted Wordcount: 10-20k

MCU

Explosion

Concept: A continuation of the original one-shot.

Progress: 0 Words Written; Planning progress 5%

Predicted Wordcount: 5-10k

Star

Concept: A continuation of the original one-shot.

Progress: 0 Words Written; Planning progress 5%

Predicted Wordcount: 50-60k

Effects of Magical Deals

Concept: A continuation of the end of Death.

Progress: 0 Words Written; Planning progress 5%

Predicted Wordcount: 5-15k

Danger; The Other Standpoint.

Concept: Danger from Bucky's perspective.

Progress: 0 Words Written; Planning progress 5%

Predicted Wordcount: 2-5k

Born of Another Tribe

Concept: What if Tony's mother was an honorary Wakandan, found when she was young and raised there until the day that she left to explore her original homeland, raising Tony with the knowledge that he too was born of his mother's clan and welcome on Wakandan soil, though he'd never been? How much would Tony's life change? Would he still follow the same path of life or would things change in ways that no-one could ever imagine?

Progress: 0 Words Written; Planning progress 1%

Predicted Wordcount: 20-60k

Cosmic Adventures

Concept: I'm actually thinking of turning this one into a series and basing each one-shot on a different character. Basically the idea is that when Tony was 20, he had a major breakthrough in space travel and created his very own ship that he used to begin travelling the universe. It will be completely AU from the original MCU and will focus on watching him go through different planets and make allies along the way that he wouldn't have if he'd stayed on Earth.

Progress: 0 Words Written; Planning progress 1%

Predicted Wordcount: 5-10k per instalment in the series

Raised in Knowhere

Concept: Tony was taken by accident by a group of skrulls when they escaped from Earth at a young age. Unsure what to do, but kind beings that they are, they took him in and raised him like their own. Join him as he travels the universe with different knowledge, ready to make new friends.

Progress: 0 Words Written; Planning progress 1%

Predicted Wordcount: 20-40k

One Piece

Eudaimonia

Concept: Eudaimonia (n.) The contented happy state that we feel when we travel. I've been reading a lot of One Piece fanfiction lately and I've always been fond of the ASL Whitebeard trope and its various forms. But there's a distinct lack of Papa Shanks instead of Whitebeard so I thought about this; What if Shanks took Luffy with him after all?

Progress: 0 Words Written; Planning progress 1%

Predicted Wordcount: 50-100k

FMA

Monachopsis

Concept: Monachopsis (n.) a subtle but persistent feeling of being out of place. Ever wonder what things look like from the perspective of an outsider looking in on Mustang's command from a military point of view? Particularly in the case of Edward Elric, the Fullmetal Alchemist and his many insubordinate moments that seem to be passed off without question within Mustang's place of work. Join the temporary members of Mustang's team as they quickly learn that just because Edward Elric can do it - it doesn't mean they can. 'Just what makes him so special anyway?'

Progress: 0 Words Written; Planning progress 1%

Predicted Wordcount: 10-20k

Orenda

Concept: Orenda (n.) A mystical force present in all people that empowers them to effect the world, or to affect changes in their own lives. What if Ed is actually really good at diplomacy and had been doing things behind the scenes to help but Amestris at peace with the other countries during his time away? What happens when he ends up the centre of peace talks between Amestris, Xing, Creta, Drachma and Aeurgo as they try to bring about an age of peace? And how will Mustang, Fuhrer of Amestris, and his loyal team react to the sudden appearance of Ed after nearly four years - and in a setting of politics no less!

Progress: 0 Words Written; Planning progress 50%

Predicted Wordcount: 40-80k

Bluffing

Concept: When Mustang's team starts holding a weekly game of poker to "increase camaraderie", the team find themselves amazed at just how bad the older Elric seems to be at the game. At least, until they found themselves penniless when a stroke of luck hits him and he manages to win a detrimental round. However after four months of a weekly poker night and the fifth time this happens, they start to wonder... Just a crack style idea i've had in my mind. I don't often plan out One-shots but I though that this could be something fun for a change of pace and I can definitely see Ed doing this and when they figure out he's been playing them this whole time, he can express his disappointment at how long it took, pointing out that the was a genius and probability was hardly Aeurogian alchemy.

Progress: 0 Words Written; Planning progress 10%

Predicted Wordcount: 5-10k

Style

Concept: Ed goes away to a foreign country and comes back wearing a completely new style of clothing. Turns out that while away a clan adopted him and gifted him their wears so he had no choice but to use them (because he wasn't completely cold heart okay?).

Progress: 0 Words Written; Planning progress 1%

Predicted Wordcount: 5-15k

Merlin

Powerful

Concept: A continuation of the end of Disaster.

Progress: 0 Words Written; Planning progress 5%

Predicted Wordcount: 1-5k

Apoplectic

Concept: Apoplectic (adj.) Overcome with rage; furious. When the newest squires joins Camelot, they find themselves watching the interactions between Prince Arthur and his manservant and decide that in order to earn the favour of their Prince, they would make his life more difficult. After all, the Prince hates his insolent manservant... right? Things do not go as he plans however.

Progress: 0 Words Written; Planning progress 1%

Predicted Wordcount: 10-20k