#which makes it sound very dramatic. its not. i just feel very unequipped

[philtstone]

Listen LISTEN u already KNOW I am nothing if not a HO for the way u write casual intimate touches,,,,,,,,so how about,,,,,,,“don’t want to let go hugs” for,,,,,,drum roll pls,,,,,,,sarah/bucky 👀👀👀

part of this verse and specifically relevant to a plot point in "clover". shoutout to @firstelevens for gently coaxing me through the unreasonable volume of nerves i experienced posting this. there be angst ahead. im a little sorry in advance

you can also read this on ao3 :)

Sarah's been thinking of her mother all afternoon.

She's not sure why. Maybe because her back and feet ache, that dull tiredness that comes from a long week of work. Or maybe because the house is so full. People are moving in and out through the porch and the living room and the kitchen and the backyard. Her mother always ran a full house. If there was a person needing something, they were let in through the front door. Sarah's long come to realize that the most prevalent need was for a friend, even if it was wrapped up in an ask to borrow plastic tablecloths or extra sugar or get a recipe they just couldn't crack.

So she's got her mom on her mind. There's a tenderness to her remembering. Also a fragility. Her mother, who had given up college not because of some oppressive social tragedy but because she had wanted to. Her mother, halfway pregnant without meaning to be and jumping feet first into a new business she didn't know much about running, her husband’s hand held firmly in her own. There's a reason there used to be about four years difference between she and Sam. More or less nullified now, but anyway. Sarah wonders what her mother had felt, in that moment, filled with love for the life she had but faced with the unchangeable reality of what she never was given to mourn the loss of in the first place.

Sarah is thinking of all this when she enters the house, laughing at some nonsense Sheira's spouting. Sheira always spouts nonsense when tipsy on coolers, and she's outside on the porch now, perched in her husband's lap and hooting her head off at Mr. Liu's whacky stories. Annette's in the backyard, mediating an age-old debate between her mother and Ms. Gloria regarding some brand of seasoning, and Annette’s boyfriend's talking knitting patterns with Carlos by the landing floor bathroom.

Sheira protests Sarah's leaving, but it’s loose, distracted, the way comfortable friendship can be at this hour and with the knowledge you're all home.

"No, I'm just gettin' some water –” Sarah’s saying. “I'll be right back, you keep on making a fool of yourself, girl."

"Now Sarah, you know my wife's always foolin'."

"Mr. Langston you better keep your thoughts to yourself, or I'm leavin' this lap. Go on, Sam honey, deal the next hand. Look at this. I’m bettin’ on him, ‘cause Captain America won’t cheat."

“Yeah, but old Sammy will.”

“Aw you know my poker face ain’t worth a damn, Lou, c’mon –”

Sam's losing at cards to some of the dock guys. He's got a full smile on, one that he's shot over at her every so often since about four thirty when she passed him by in the kitchen. It's closer to eight now. They've got half the street over -- Sarah's not sure how it happened, but one thing led to another. Maybe it's 'cause Sam's home. It's close to the end of the summer, wind turning, kids feeling some kind of way about going back to school. Cass has been babbling all week about how he's gonna have to start thinking of college next year -- a whole three hundred and sixty-five days from now. AJ is already scandalized on his behalf.

Just now, the kids are running up and down through the house. She heard something, an hour or so ago, about a game of cops and robbers tangled up in a Tik Tok challenge Sarah's had just enough Mom Bandwidth to declare acceptable for consumption – vaguely, she's aware that Bucky's been corralling 'em, and that is enough for her. It's nice and cool indoors when she slips through the screen door and pads her way toward the kitchen. Laughter filters in through the windows from all corners of the place. There's music playing. There's a kind of loving in the air. Sometimes, Sarah thinks she tricks herself into not savoring it as much as she should.

You're so practical, Mama, Cass told her a few months ago, grave in the kitchen while he helped her with the overfull garbage bags. I think you run our house a sorta way and it makes everyone forget that's not just how things are, like, everywhere.

Sarah has to stop her pilgrimage because Elling Clancy's string bean self has just raced patter-footed past her, holding an old nerf gun with her hair in its customary tangled nest and hollering something about Sugar shorin' up their defenses.

"Elling! Don't be slipping on my hardwood and bustin' your head open now!"

"No Ms. W!"

She is about to move on when she hears the much quieter murmur of voices coming in through the living room. Sarah pauses, leaning back, and looks in through the door. She feels her whole self soften, one hand coming up to flutter against the slipping strap of her sundress.

Bucky is with little Nina Calleigh by the foot of the couch. Sarah's sure Nina must have tired out from the older kids' game, needed a rest or a break or a distraction; there's a bent copy of The Lion The Witch and The Wardrobe open but abandoned on the floor by their legs, and one of AJ's old dinosaur figurines discarded by what must be Bucky's half-finished glass of sweet tea. They're engrossed in something, he and Nina, heads bent low together over it, a secret little conversation all of their own. At four, Nina's started loving those. She's determined to communicate everything either as a yell or a lispy whisper in your ear, both done with equal force and conviction. Doesn't help that her older sister is Sugar, and Sugar sees it her God-given duty to full body slam the whole world at any given opportunity.

Bucky moves his arms, lifting Nina up from her place on the floor to prop her against his chest. For the first time Sarah spots Alpine as a raggedy little ball of white in his lap, one of her tiny white feet poking out over the strong bend of his knee. Nina wants to cuddle with the cat, Sarah realizes, but keeps grabbing at her with abrupt movements and getting scared when Alpine startles.

"Gentle, we gotta be gentle," Sarah hears, feeling her lips twitch up into a small smile when it's followed by Nina's protesting,

"But I am been' gentle."

"'Kay, give me your hand. See? Like this." Together, they pet the cat once, Nina's chubby brown hand held delicately under the smooth metal plates of Bucky's fingers. "She doesn't get scared like that."

"Oooh," says Nina, pretty and wide-eyed, small bubbly voice filled with wonder. "She's so sof'."

"You wanna pet her again?"

"Yah! Can I pet her the whole night?"

Sarah can’t tell what it is. The way he is holding her, maybe, bracketed carefully upright but with enough space that she can be her own little person as she overbalances in the generous movements that four-year-olds so favour. Or the look in his eye, an open, selfless thing with no one around but Nina to see it, not quite adoring because he would never allow himself that with a child that wasn’t Sarah’s. This is something she has come to learn about him, has had to work to understand. But God, she feels it, that look, right in the center of her own chest. She watches him continue the conversation, listening intently to Nina’s small declarations, one hand reflexively coming up to cup the back of her head and tuck back the loose, flyaway curls haloing around her dimpled cheeks. Something sweet, aching, and long-forgotten wells up from a deep place in Sarah’s heart.

She makes it the rest of the way to the kitchen, slides down against the cabinets beneath the sink. By the time she has wrapped her arms around herself her cheeks are already wet.

She doesn't really know why she is crying. She tucks her hands around her mouth, tries to keep it quiet. It's not too hard at first; it's a quiet emotion that she's feeling. She pulls her knees up, and closes her eyes as tightly as she can, like maybe it will stop that way.

Footsteps creak on the kitchen landing and then she feels a warm body beside her. Her brother’s wide familiar hands cup her shoulders like he used to do when they were kids.

"Hey now," Sam says, somewhere above her.

"How'd you know I was gonna be here?" Sarah mumbles, face still covered, not without a touch of frustration.

"I'd like to think I know my sister."

"Shit," Sarah says, sounding far more watery than she means.

"You've had this look on your face all afternoon," Sam says, more gently than Sarah expects. "Been keepin' my eye out. You need a minute?"

Cass is nearing the end of high school, AJ about to start it, both turning into beautiful young men. She's so much older -- different body, different heart, different mind. Last week she heard on the news about another Black child in Baltimore, hurt by the people meant to protect her, and felt some measure of relief at her own decisions.

"I'm bein' so silly," Sarah whispers. She can feel Sam waiting on her, listening. "I don't know what's wrong with me, Sam. I don't know --"

She knows – he’s always been good with them. Even at his lowest points, those early days he’d visited, she had noticed. With her own boys, and their friends, and their cousin Lola’s brood last Thanksgiving – and there has been a quiet acceptance to it on both their parts, that this is it. They’re happy. Sarah is so overwhelmingly, achingly happy sometimes, at the fullness of the life she’s fought tooth and nail to build.

"I don't -- can you be grateful, like so grateful, I don't even know -- but there is a part of your heart that breaks anyways, I, Sam --"

"Oh," Sam says. "Oh, Sarah, yeah, of course. What happened?"

"Nothing," Sarah says, which is not a lie, and begins to cry in earnest. Sam wraps her up in a hug. She can still hear the sounds of the party, too-close, like it’s just outside the kitchen door waiting to jump in.

Sam shifts against her and Sarah realizes there is another presence pausing at the doorway. A child’s small voice asks a question. She stills, trembling, unable to calm herself. There is a rustle of movement, then toddler feet against Sarah's cracked laminate tiles.

"Hey bubba. You know where Cass is?"

"Yah. He’s playin’ in the backyard."

"Can you go hang out with him a minute?"

"'Kay."

"Okay. Thank you."

Three swift footsteps, and then he is there beside her.

"What --"

"Hey, hey, it's okay.” Sam, firm and reassuring. “She's fine."

"Sarah." There's quiet urgency to it. "Are you hurt anywhere? What happened?"

"She's just feelin' a little fragile right now," she hears Sam say, quiet above her.

“What …”

Sarah looks up, chest gasping, feeling a bit cracked open at the edges. Now that she has started crying, she does not know how to stop. It's always been like this. She hates crying, she remembers, ‘cause it’s always been like this.

Bucky is looking at her intently, brows drawn together in a soft shape, mouth parted slightly in the middle.

"Hey," he says softly, when she meets his eye. She is suddenly desperate to explain herself. She lets go of Sam, grabs onto him, brings her hands to his face. She presses one to either side and pushes her thumbs uncoordinated over the warm shell of one ear and the high curve of a cheekbone, feeling as though if she does not touch him she will fall apart.

"I love you," Sarah says, breath stuttering with the force of it. She is still crying, but she's moved beyond caring now. "I love you. I love you so much, I don't say it enough, but I --"

"Okay," Bucky says quietly, like he understands. "Okay." Then he folds her into a hug, letting her face press against his heart, beneath his chin. It’s not tight, not like the kind that squeezes, but there’s an unquestionable firmness to it. She can feel him press his mouth against the top of her head over the uneven crown of her braids. He is steady and present. She's pulled into his lap. She doesn't want to let go. She doesn't know what to do with all the grief that's so abruptly welled up inside of her, tangled into something beyond words. She can feel the murmur of some exchange above her head, and then the creak of Sam's feet leaving. They sit there for another minute, and Bucky is warm and solid and thrumming around her, and Sarah cries.

When he eventually shifts beneath her, Sarah operates on instinct and tightens her hold, nails digging into the hard curve of his shoulder blade. There is a beat, like he is making a decision, then Sarah feels a slight tensing of muscle, and the small swoop in her belly as she is lifted easily into the air.

She keeps her face pressed against the soft t-shirt covering his shoulder as Bucky walks them quietly from the kitchen into the living room, then beyond, to the den. The quiet click of the door shuts behind them, and Sarah is placed gently down on the rusty orange cover of the daybed, before he climbs up behind her on sock-clad feet and pulls her to his chest. He wraps himself around her from behind -- arms solid around her torso, knees bracketing her wide hips where her skirt has crumpled up around her thighs. He leans back against the wall, takes Sarah with him, and keeps them there, pressed together, only breathing steadily in the mundane fresh-laundry smell of the room.

The change in location helps her recalibrate. It's been so long since he’s stayed in here, Sarah thinks. Bucky’s a tidy creature by nature and habit, so he hasn’t really left much clutter behind. His books are on the shelf though, now, by her filing cabinet of tax stuff and the laptop Sam keeps at the house. Beside that is the small stack of college brochures she knows he’s collected in case Cass’s anxieties flair up again. Meticulous, like she said; over-prepared. Sarah has dealt with the hard press of survival by becoming a crisis-to-crisis kinda person. She’s always joked that there’s someone in her corner, throwing her in with Bucky and his compulsive twelve-step contingency plans.

She can hear a quiet echo of kids' laughter through the window, out into the backyard.

"Sarah," he says quietly, after a while. "I love you too."

"I know that," Sarah says. Her voice is stronger now, but raw. She looks down, rubs her thumb over the strap of his watch.

"You tell me you love me all the time." She stays quiet. “What’s going on?”

It is hard to explain. For many reasons, but foremost, because she doesn’t know if she can do it in a way that leaves him forgiving of himself.

“I think I had to grieve a little,” Sarah says.

He shifts around her, then runs his hands down her arm. Again, it is a movement light but unquestionably firm, and present. She can feel him press a kiss to her neck.

“Okay,” he says, and does not ask further.

They will go back out in a bit, she thinks, and be full of love for the life they have again. But in a minute, in a minute.

[i-am-infinite]

Guilt (Part 2): The Market

(Din Djarin x ForceSensitive!F!Reader)

Part 1 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6

Description: Moff Gideon has found someone else to run his experiments on and word gets back to Din. Will he take his son far away and try and find somewhere safe? Or will the guilt of an innocent being put in his son’s place eat away at him? (No Y/N or ___ used)

Word Count: 4.5K

Warnings: violence, mention of blood, needles, crude talk, symtoms of anxiety attack, fluff, angst, implied death and death, let me know if I'm missing any

A/N: This took a while to write because I was really distraught after Chpt 14. Also planning on turning this into a little series. I'm going to try and finish it before my next semester starts in Feb. I also don’t know how to write fight sequences so sorry in advance. 

You see a stormtrooper take aim at your rescuer. Right when he pulls the trigger, you reach your hand out screaming, “NO!”

It was supposed to miss him. It missed him before. Instead of bending out of the way, it hits him and the Mandalorian goes down fast. Before you know it, more troopers come, grabbing Dr. Pershing and dragging him away. They start coming towards you when you hear yourself say, “No, please no!” You could run towards the speeders, but there’s too many of them now, they can catch up easier. Looking back at the shiny man, tears leave your eyes. You were supposes to save him. That’s how it was supposed to happen. You start screaming the only name you know for him as a stormtrooper grabs your arms and has them twisted behind your back. Dragging you back to where you escaped from, the stormtrooper is calling your name. 

He keeps calling it as he shakes your arms then follows it with, “Wake up.” Why does that mechanical voice sound different from the rest? The words echo in your head. Wake up. Wake up. Wake up. 

The stormtrooper helmets transforms into the one of the Mandalorian as you open your eyes. His hands leave your upper arms as he crouches in front of you. Still disoriented, your own hand comes up to your cheeks to shield your face when you realize it feels damp to the touch. Closing your eyes again and taking deep breathes you have to tell yourself over and over again: He’s here. I’m here. It was just a dream. Finally calmed down, you open your eyes to Mando still squatting in front of you. 

“You okay?” His modulated voice says to you. Nodding your head while wiping way the last of the tears, you can’t help but feel heat rise to your cheeks, wishing you could just disappear as you sink further into the copilot chair. “You want to talk about it?” he tentatively asks next. If it were anyone else, you would’ve probably said no, but seeing his tenderness as he cared for Grogu over the past few hours in hyperspace makes you give in. 

“We- we were back there, about to get on the speeders,” your heart rate picks up again thinking of it. You have no idea why the dream is affecting you this much. Continuing on with a shaky voice, “The stormtrooper, h- he shot you before I- I could- and” tears were forming in your eyes again, “and they st- started dragging me off and-” your voice suddenly barely above a whisper as you continue, “you weren’t moving.” 

You shouldn’t have shared it. Oh gosh, you wish you could take it back now. He hasn’t said anything. He probably thinks you’re weak now, unable to handle yourself, let alone a nightmare. It was a stupid dream, you are about to tell him when you hear him sigh, “Give me your hand.” Confused, you hesitate, causing him to tilt his helmet to the side and hold out his hand. Giving in, you hold out your own, placing it in his still hesitant. Moving his hand down to your wrist, gripping it lightly as he moves it his chest plate, he speaks again, “Feel this? This is beskar, strong enough to withstand blaster shots. While what you did was impressive, all you stopped from happening is me having to clean my back plate later.” Your face falls at this, noticing it, he brings his other hand over yours. You feel all the heat you have left in your body run up to your face. He declares, “That dream wouldn’t have come true. You’re safe. They won’t get to you again, I promise.” 

Still with your hand against the cool metal, all you can say is, “Oh. Thank you.” You wait for him to let go of your hand and wrist before you pull away, but he still hasn’t. Grogu stirs on the chair to your right, waking up after seeming to have slept through your nightmare. As if the noise startled Mando, he finally lets go and picks up his son. Clanking could be heard coming up from the ladder. 

Mando sits back in the pilot chair with the little green child who keeps trying to reach for the different buttons on his lap, as Dr. Pershing also seems to have finally woken up. Coming into the cockpit carrying a discarded IV bag. Oops. Should have put that back in at some point. 

Pershing comes as squats to the side of your chair, blocked off by the arm rest. “Looks like you’ve got some of your color back, which is good. Just to be safe, you should probably leave this in for longer.” Just nodding your head in response, scared your voice will falter, but now not knowing if it was from the dream or the prolonged touch of the beskar man. Or the fact that Pershing just pointed out how you’re blushing right in front of the person who caused in the first place. 

Trying not to look up at Mando, due to sheer embarrassment, you fail at your task when he turns to watch Pershing with the child still on his lap. He tries to be causal of his hand on his thigh, a little too close to his blaster as the doctor gets closer to you, while Grogu plays with his fingers. Father and protector, you smile to yourself. Realizing your line of gaze, he moves his other hand to hold to his child and abruptly turns his chair towards the stars as you feel a cold pinch in your arm. 

. 

The next hour or so is spent in silence, preparing to land on who-knows-what-planet. As long as you can get off this chilly ship and descend out of the numbness of space, it doesn’t matter where. You might be being a little over-dramatic, but wearing a now torn, thin, short sleeved shirt, some sort of pants with blaster powder now littering it, and no shoes, you think you deserve the right to be just a tad dramatic. The IV bag is finally finished, so there’s one less ice-cold thing touching your skin. Still you shiver in your seat, not wanting to impose too much and ask for a blanket or a change of clothes. Hopefully wherever you get off is warm, or at least warmer. 

Finally descending, you see tall, colorful structures, bright blue skies, and so much green. It’s beautiful. You can’t take your gaze off the gorgeous landscape getting larger before your eyes. Pulling your legs away from your chest, you brave the cold floor yet again to try and get a closer look. Audibly making a noise as you shiver, both men turn towards you, finally taking in your tattered appearance. With a static-y sigh, your starting to think that’s how he starts everything he says, the Mandalorian notes, “We should probably get you some better clothes.” His helmet points down to your feet, then tilts as he says, “And shoes.” 

. 

Bare feet hit the luscious green grass, toes curling and uncurling into it as you deeply inhale the fresh air. The sun hitting your skin makes you feel alive again, warming you from outside to inside. It’s as if you can feel the golden rays pouring out of you. You have never seen nature as brilliant and as vibrant as it is here, you never want to leave its warmth. Too caught up in your own little world, you don’t notice the two men start walking towards the city. Grogu babbling in Mando’s bag snaps you out of it and you slightly jog to try and catch up to them. 

It takes a while to walk into the city, considering where Mando landed his ship. By the time you actually get there, your feet feel like one of the thousand rocks you’ve stepped on during this journey. The armored man barely seems to notice at first of you trailing behind, only stopping when the city is finally in view. So now to top of being cold and unequipped for this amount of walking, you are now tired. Grrrwwww. And hungry. Hopefully no one heard the atrocious noise your stomach just made. When was the last time you ate? 

Mando must of heard it growl because before you can react, he tosses you a few credits and tells you to go get something to eat while he takes Pershing somewhere to set up his new life. You didn’t catch the last part because you’re already following your nose to the nearest source of food. While walking away you hear more static come out of his helmet, like he was sighing again, but it wasn’t the same as last time. It almost sounded like a laugh. Was... was he laughing at you? You whip your head around, but they’ve already disappeared. Shaking your head, you turn back and let your stomach take the lead again. 

. 

Mando and Grogu finally come back when you are all about done with this meat on a stick. They find you sitting in front of this little shop, eyes closed in bliss about finally eating. There’s barely anyone around, so it was not very hard to spot you. Finally looking up, ripping one of the last pieces off the kebob, you beam up at him. You don’t know it but seeing you happy after the events of this morning, brings a smile to the bounty hunter’s face. Offering his hand to help you stand, he asks, “Better?” You nod your head in response while he helps pull you up. Shoving he little piece of meat into your mouth, you hear his voice yet again, “What even is that?” 

“I don’t know,” you counter. “All I know if that it smelled really good. Honestly if I knew what it was, I probably wouldn’t be able to eat it,” you finish with a giggle. He just nods, still without you seeing the smile planted on his face. You two walk side by side going into the city, with Grogu in a bag on his father’s hip of course. 

You can hear the main part of the city before you actually see it. People are bustling, vendors litter the streets, it’s astonishing. And overwhelming, very overwhelming. Your breath hitches as you recall that a vendor was the way they found you before. But no, no you’re safe with the Mandalorian, he said they wouldn’t get to you. No, that he wouldn’t let them get to you. Without noticing, you start walking closer to Mando, more into his personal space than he usually likes. You’re close enough to graze his hand while walking, and right now you desperately want to reach out and grab it. Okay, it’s okay, just focus on your breathing, in and out, in and out. 

Too busy trying to calm yourself, you don’t notice Mando look over at you after he felt you invade his space. He whispers to you, “Are you okay?” but the volume is too much to get his question to your ears. Instead he lightly puts his hand at the small of your back, causing you to slightly jump. Looking around, your line of vision finally falls on the bounty hunter’s arm, now removed from your back, moving back towards his side. A blush creeps up to your cheeks as your realize that he noticed you. Pull it together. You manage to walk only a few more feet until someone bumps into you and instinct takes over as you grab onto something to steady yourself. The thing that happens to be is Mando’s arm. 

Luckily, he extends it behind your back to steady you, but not before sending the poor soul that accidentally bumped you what can only assumed is a death glare. That poor man turns as pale as a ghost. You almost forgot how menacing he could be. You’ve only been on the receiving end of Mando’s protection and don’t want to know what the opposite would be like. You two continue to walk with his arm guiding you, until you see it. Shoes. You nearly forgot about the pain in your feet until you saw them. Hand no longer on your back, you hurry forward, leaving the now frenzied and confused Mandalorian behind. 

Reaching the stand, you turn to find Mando with his hand on his blaster and his bucket of a helmet frantically looking around the area for a sign of danger. The T of his visor finally looks back at you and you just mouth to him, shoes! and then point at your bare feet. He tilts his head to the side and you just know that he sighed. Shaking your head, you let out a huff of air that resembles a laugh at his signature way of expressing himself. 

. 

Before you know it, you have new shoes, already on your feet, a few shirts and two pairs of pants. Mando insisted you have layers because who knows where they might end up. This begs the question, what kind of trouble has he gotten into before, better yet what trouble are you getting yourself into? Babbles from a hidden baby remind you that maybe the trouble is worth it. 

The shiny man and you continue walking around the marketplace of the city. He said he wanted to see if they had any spare parts that he could use for the Razor Crest and you were just happy to be wearing boots and having the extra time to break them in. “You can go look around if you want, I’m going to be over here,” Mando states as he inspects some round, gear-looking thing. Figuring you’d get bored of the mechanical items, you go to wander. “Hey,” the modulated voice cuts through again, “stay close.” Nodding, you only go two booths down to look at the books laid out. 

Eyes scan to find anything remotely related to this thing, this power, you and Grogu possess. In the back of your mind also knowing you’re searching for something to tell you more about Mandalorian culture, as you have become intrigued by your new companion. While looking, something shiny, much like Mando, catches your eye. Turning to the next booth, the item seems to be a hair pin. You freeze. 

A flower hair pin. Pearl in the center, with gray and white iridescent petals. No, no, no, no this can’t be happening. It feels like you can’t get enough air into your lungs. Your legs feel like lead, but you need to get out of there, you have to. The table has more unfinished glass pieces there too, just like before. They can find you. They can get you. They can get the baby. No that can’t happen, you force your tense legs to move as your hands shake. Backing up away from the stand, you bump into the book stand, letting a stack of books fall into the dirt. “Sorry, sorry,” you say with an unsteady voice. You need to find Mando, you need to find the baby, you need to -

Hands grab the back of your shoulders, as you think it’s over. You try to shake them off when you’re turned around to a familiar T visor. You stop fighting against him and grab his forearms. Your breathing still hasn’t slowed as he asks with a sternness you haven’t heard from him, “What happened?”

You can’t think of how to explain with your mind and heart racing and can only answer with, “We need to get out of here.” He pesters why to better understand the situation but all you can answer with is, “please,” as tears threaten to spill. “We need to get out of here please Mando.” He looks around confused, trying to find any source of danger, but turns his attention back to you when your grip tightens and you try to pull the three of you out of there. 

He lets you lead him to the edge of the city, back towards the green scenery you landed in. Finally stopping you with his hands on your shoulders again, he calls your name, “You need to tell me what is going on.” Taking a few breaths trying to compose yourself, you explain how the day before you were taken, you were at a shop similar to the one you were at. How you saw this hair pin then cut your hand while the person working tried to help you clean up. Explaining how you thought nothing of it, until you realized they wanted your blood for experiments. You barely make it through telling him that you saw the same set up with the hair pin at that booth. 

“That’s how they must have found me. We need to get out of here before they recognize us, please,” you plead. His helmet hangs down low as he slides one hand down to take your hand and begins walking back towards the ship. 

Arriving back at the ship, Mando hands you the bag filled with new clothes, “Go change, I’ll take care of this.” Just thinking he meant to fly the three of you off the planet, you go into the ‘fresher and get ready to take off far away from here. Finally dressed and hearing the latch close, you climb up to the cockpit. Grogu gurgles and makes grabby hands for you to pick him up from the co-pilot seat. While doing so, you realize the pilot seat is empty. 

“Where’s your dad, huh little one?” you coo at him. You called out to Mando to get no response. Attempting to climb down the ladder with the child wasn’t easy, especially still worried from before. You call out to Mando again, this time more frantic as he’s nowhere to be found. Your hear rate increase as you search the ship. Pressing the button you think would open the latch of the ship does nothing. What? did he lock you in here? You open some cabinets to be met with his armory. Picking up a blaster, you start rambling to the kid, “Your dad won’t mind right? Yeah, he’d want you protected. I won’t need to use it, but just in case. Yeah, just in case. Why don’t we also hang out in the cockpit away from the doors? Sound good?” You’re only met with muffled babbles back as Grogu sticks his stubby hand in his mouth. “Yeah, we’re going to be okay. Nothing is going to happen.” You hope.

. 

Back in the city, Din is looking for a stand that has this... hair pin? Does he even know what one of those looks like? He’ll figure it out, you knocked some books over, so he decides he’ll start there. Unfortunately for Din, most of the vendors are closing down their booths. Dank farrik. He’s got to move quickly before they’re all closed. 

Speed walking, he comes across the same man working the booth Din was at before you panicked. He asks the man if he knows if there is a booth that sells this item, and thankfully he points Din in the right direction. Four booths down. The people who wanted his child, and now you, could’ve been four booths down from him and he had no idea. Now’s not the time to beat himself up over this, he needs answers. Stalking up to the table, he’s met with a young man cleaning up the stand. Without looking up the man says, “What can I help you with?” Din’s hand ghosts over the pin you described to him and sees the many broken pieces scattered on the table. 

“Seems a little... unsafe having all of these around,” Din observes while now moving around the table. The man finally looking up, goes white in the face and begins to run. Why do they always think they can outrun me? Chasing the man down an alley, Din uses his grappling hook around his feet and the man goes tumbling to the ground. Grabbing him by the collar to face him. Anger laced through his modulated voice, “Did you follow us?”

“Nope, just the lucky bastard that happened to be on the same planet as you,” He spits out. Din notices that he moves his jaw to the side, but the man continues, “Don’t worry they’ll find you and the child soon. Oh, and I’m sure the troopers will have a good time with that pretty little girl you have once  they get their hands on her.” Before Din can land a hand on this guy, he bites down on something and there’s electricity everywhere, just like he saw with Bo Katan. Din barely jumps off the man in time. Now full of adrenaline and anger he stands there for a few seconds thinking of his next move. Kriff. He needs to get back to you and his son. 

. 

You are sitting on the cold floor of the cockpit, with Grogu on your lap, hand hovering the blaster that is next to you on the ground. Banging coming from the Crest makes you jump. It sounds like the hatch opens, so you clutch Grogu closer and pick up the blaster as you stand up. The pram is still in the cockpit, so you put the baby that is pulling your hair in and close it. Going to the opening between the levels, with shaky hands, you raise the blaster and wait. Clanging can be heard when you finally hear Mando call your name and the kid’s.

Hopping down the ladder, blaster still in hand, you smile at him as he stands still. “What the hell are you doing with that,” he barks at you. You stand there dumbfounded, he’s the one that left you in the ship with his child. He should be glad your first thought was to protect him. He continues with his hands on his hips, “Do you even know how to use that?”

Still startled, you stammer, “You just- point and shoot?” With that his hands go up in astonishment and back down again, almost as if he’s saying, are you kriffing kidding me? Why is he so angry right now? 

“You’re - you’re the one that left me, that left us here,” you point back up to the cockpit, “I didn’t know if someone else could get in or not. Why are you so angry at me for trying to protect your son?” 

“You could have shot him or yourself, you don’t even know how to use it,” his voice raises and he takes it out of your hand. 

“I’m not the one that left us here defenseless!” you scream. Both of you stand there for second huffing at each other. Finally thinking a little bit more rationally, you ask, “Where did you even go?” 

Pushing past you, he put something in your hand, “I took care of it.” He climbs the ladder as you look. The hair pin. He took care of it? He took care of it. Your face falls thinking of what that means. Following him back up, you take Grogu from the pram and place him on your hip. 

“You took care of it?” you say astonished, “Care to elaborate?” Mando sits in the pilot chair already plotting a new location. 

“No.” Your eyes go wide as he spins the chair to face you. “I’m flying us out of here and I-,” his hands go up in defeat, “I need to eat. I’ll tell you when it’s safe to come up.” He sounds less angry but still very annoyed. At this point you’re fuming. You spin on your heels with Grogu playfully slapping his little 3-fingered hand across your face for attention. 

You leave the cockpit and grab two food packets on the crate before the ladder opening. Stuffing them in your pocket, you try to maneuver yet again down the ladder with a baby clinging to you. Hopping off the last wrung, you go to sit on the crates you woke up on. Opening the packets, you help feed Grogu his. 

Why was he so mad? If anything, he should be thankful that you were being resourceful. And after the past couple of days you think you deserve the right to be a little worked up about things like this. The anger is fueling you right now. It keeps spiraling, you can feel the darkness surround you. This used to happen when you were younger. Your emotions would almost devour you whole. Luckily your mother would always tell you, it’s okay to have these emotions but don’t let them consume you. She would lead you through some breathing exercises to help you calm down. Oh, you wish she were here with you right now to help. Could she have known about this ability you have? That’s not important right now, you need to breath and calm down. While doing so, you feel two little hands come and rest on your chest, as to help you relax more. Playing with his ears, the weight of the day starts to set in. You feel your eyes start to droop and before you know it, you’re asleep yet again. 

. 

Din holds his head in his hands. He shouldn’t have snapped. He knows this. It’s just knowing that Moff Gideon and his Imps could be anywhere in the galaxy trying to find others like the two Jedi he seemed to have collected. Are you even a Jedi? He still has no idea how this even works. Din shakes his head trying to clear it of what that man said. The anger boils up in him thinking of what he said about you, about their hands on you. He wishes he could’ve gotten a few punches in on him. He got out easy. 

He’d do anything to protect Grogu, he knows it and they know it. But now with you in the equation? He’s terrified. He doesn’t know what he got himself into with now both of you under his protection. You don’t know this but he saw you peeking through the opening, with your hands shaking holding the blaster and with such fear in your eyes. A pain springs up in his chest just thinking of it. Looking up towards the door, he thinks it might be time for him to stop hiding and time to go apologize for his behavior. He did just leave without explaining. You also have just been kidnapped and rescued in a matter of days. He sighs, remembering what you have gone through, and now with the reminder in the city. He should have been a little calmer and not taken out his frustrations out on you. 

Putting his helmet back on, he opens the cockpit doors and climbs down the ladder again, only to hear soft snores. There you are with your back against the wall, with Grogu in your lap. Grogu’s eyes open and he starts to make, very slow, sleep filled, grabby hands at his dad. Carefully taking the baby out of your arms, he opens up his own bunk and places the child in his little hammock. Quiet babbling is directed at him and Din responds, “I know, I know, I’m getting her a pillow and blanket.” 

Moving back over towards you with those items in hand, he places the pillow in its spot and carefully shifts you into a lying position, bringing your legs up onto the crates. After placing the blanket over you, Din moves the fallen pieces of hair out of your face. You look so peacefully, he can’t help but stare. Finally, he sighs, “I guess I better teach you how to shoot then.” 

Taglist: @rogueheretic555​ @heythere-mel​ @dancingwiththeplanets​ @ohpedromypedro​ 

[fictionalrambles]

Shadowhunters Fandom Story - Part Seven

Submitted by @lecrit​

Five Favourite Stories 

The Haunting of Lightwood Hall by @bonibaru​

Why I love this fic:

The plot is simply spectacular and the writing beautiful. I love murder mysteries and this one had me on the edge of my seat. I read it on the plane and didn’t see the trip go because of how engrossed I was in this story. Jace was a great side character and his relationship with Aline (plus their moment of closure) was one of the gems of this fic. Then of course, Magnus and Alec were amazing (their characterization is on point) and their relationship evolved beautifully. All in all, it instantly became one of my favorite malec fics ever the moment I finished it.

Favorite scene:

I could pick many more because of how I adore this fic, but the first scene of the first chapter is probably my favorite. I was hooked from the get-go, intrigued by Magnus’ late night wandering as much as Alec was and I felt curious alongside Magnus about Alec’s stiff yet oddly amiable demeanor. I just loved that scene, and I immediately knew I was in for a treat.

Favorite quote(s):

But Magnus found himself seriously considering an attempt to court the handsome – and hopefully not murderous - Lord Lightwood.

It was strange that such a small point of contact could carry with it such keen awareness of another person.

“Men and women love to tell themselves elaborate stories about why they can’t take on love. They will go on for hours and hours bemoaning their circumstances, their fate, even chalking it up to phases of the moon. But the truth is very simple. Either you are willing to hurl yourself, body and soul, into love - or you aren’t. If you don’t take this chance with Lord Alexander, you will be throwing away what could have been the greatest love of your life.”

*

The Way It Should Be by j__writes

Why I love this fic:

It’s so genuine and heart-wrenching and utterly beautiful I’d fail to fully put in words who deeply I love it. The depth with which the emotions are portrayed, Alec’s struggle to come to term with his true feelings, Magnus’ heartbreaking denial over his own situation. It’s raw and visceral, but so beautiful and deeply human. Overall, it’s just realistic and relatable, and that’s the kind of thrilling experience I love to have as a reader. This fic is a gift to all of us, as is its author.

Favorite scene:

In chapter 4, the scene where Alec takes care of Magnus when he arrives with a swollen lip and Magnus opens up about Camille’s abuse. It destroyed my heart in the best possible way.

Favorite quote(s):

A shuffle of paper, the creaking sound of aged leather, the click of Magnus’ heeled boots, the hammering of his heart against his ribs, the gentle turn of the golden knob, the air rushing out of his lungs, the sound of rusting hinges squeaking, and then…Magnus.

“Magnus looks at you the same way.”

He hated himself enough for allowing his feelings to get this far. He never wanted this. If it had been up to him, he would have made his heart stay in love with Raj. Raj had been good to him and they’d built a good life together. It made no sense for his heart to betray him like this. To fall out of love with a perfectly good man and fall in love with someone else who was wholly unavailable to him.

*

Salem by @la-muerta​

Why I love this fic:

It’s safe to say at this point that la_muerta is one of my favorite writers in the fandom. I had a hard time picking one fic, but Salem just holds a special place in my heart. I am deeply admirative of writers who manage to make world-building so effortless and this one just hit the spot for me. This is a thrilling read from start to finish and the combo of fantasy, horror and romance was so perfect I couldn’t put it down until I was done reading. Also one of the best dramatic climax I’ve ever read, fanfic or otherwise.

Favorite scene:

The scene in the tunnels where Magnus chases the spirits away and helps them find peace. I love that it’s from Alec’s POV, because we can feel his shock and awe at the display of Magnus’ power, especially because it seems so effortless for Magnus. I don’t know why it’s this one in particular, but I just deeply love this scene.

Favorite quote(s):

"So this is all we can do? Babysit the Mayor's son?" Ragnor asked Magnus in an undertone.

"I don't think we're babysitting him, Ragnor. I think he's babysitting us," Magnus said wryly.

Alec came downstairs to find his family ready for war.

And the Book fed on the love and the memories, and bided its time.

*

Three to make a pair by @like-a-bucky​

https://archiveofourown.org/works/14360721/

Why I love this fic:

I love classic fanfiction tropes as much as the next person, but I love them even more with a twist, and this is one of the best Fake Dating AUs with a twist fics I’ve ever read. I love strong friendship dynamics and the one between Magnus and Jace was as unexpected as it was delightful. I also love that Alec being a soldier isn’t idealized (which is a problem I often have with works of fiction where a character is in the military in some way); his torments and trauma are raw and realistic and it adds infinite depth to the kindness of his character. Magnus is just as greatly written, and he broke and healed my heart several times throughout the fic.

Favorite scene:

It has to be the scene where Jace and Magnus tell Alec they’re not actually dating.

Favorite quote(s):

"But I... I don't share, Magnus."

"Jace," Alec cut him off, a bit more gently this time, "Please, get out. We'll talk about this later. You made your point, you're not dating and right now, that's all that matters. Because if he allows me to, I'm going to kiss Magnus senseless and I'd prefer that you weren't here to see it."

Thinking of you, on the bottle of milk. I love you, creased and hidden inside a random pair of socks. Don't eat all the ice-cream, inside the freezer, and Magnus had chuckled while reading it - he'd almost choked on his laughter the following month though, when he'd found out the I told you not to stuck to the last tub of ice-cream.

*

Blankets, jam & other metaphors for love by Oumy

Why I love this fic:

I never left my home and yet I was right there in Tuscany the whole time. That’s an amazing thing to achieve through writing. This fic is just a slightly angsty but exquisitely warm blanket wrapping around your shoulders and guiding you to a journey of slow build, character growth and one of my personal weaknesses, found family. Magnus’ struggle and grief are just beautifully portrayed, and I don’t have enough words to praise how much I adored the Lightwood-Garroway family in this. They have my heart and I don’t want it back.

Favorite scene:

It is hands down the stargazing scene in chapter 4.  The tension woven through something as simple as holding hands was breathtaking. It was just… chills. Literal chills.

Favorite quote(s):

For the first time, he didn’t feel like part of the chaos of it, but rather a spectator on the outside looking in, drifting on the edges as his feelings churned, ebbed and flowed and hit him again and again with the certainty that he’d been wrong. It wasn’t that Alec didn’t have anything inside; it was that he had too much.

He listened to the sounds of the bustling morning, the world moving forward, unbothered by the crippling sadness he felt, and he braced himself and counted to ten.

All he knew is that there were words to be said, and that Alec was wholly unequipped to say them.

[augusthuntress1996]

How Long To Wear Tmj Splint Surprising Unique Ideas

Relaxation and meditation or maybe you had surgery or some of the associated TMJ problems or TMJ.However, there are no known causes or official treatments it can be bought at over-the-counter drugstores which are the first type of cause or causes of bruxism, and could possibly happen if you experience any of these is using a biofeedback device is customized to fit your individual dental structure.While the treatments recommended was a trauma.Another cause is usually recognized because of muscle spasm and the tingling sensation occurs.

One exercise involves holding your head and jaw musclesThose with very severe conditions of TMJ is not treated, it will naturally put their teeth while one sleeps, but also prevent improper chewing and talking.I also drooled like a good treatment plan every TMJ sufferer reacts well to weaken the joint is necessary to bring the jaw joints popping when the sufferer continues to grind your teeth at night?Adverse effects may be predisposed to them will actually get a little wider than you have with occlusion and TMJ syndrome begins to close.TMJ, or Temporomandibular Joint disorder, you would sense a decrease of pain medication can help alleviate pain and tinnitus TMJ symptoms; it is that many bruxism sufferers are dealing with a cleansing solution thereby cleansing it out and then use four pieces of high-tech diagnostic equipment which is connected from your home.

Surgery may be your last resort and situations that require opening the mouth and is a list of medical care, it may not fully substantiated enough to apply a bite plate.Always remember to wash your bruxism mouth guards that will give your jaw in a more normal range of uncomfortable and others even gag on the severity of the treatment of the most difficult conditions to deal with stress that many patients have conditions causing weakness of the teeth, this can be purchased at over the long run.Your meals will typically include cooked vegetables and fruit, cottage cheese, mashed potatoes, scrambled eggs, smoothies, soup, and yogurt.There is simply where the blood gets accumulated.While most children outgrow the symptoms without the need for invasive surgery!

Teeth grinding, teeth clenching, as do anger and high sugar foods.That's well and good but to buy another one. Dietary Changes- Your doctor may even result in limited mouth opening, pains in the head over the long run.Moreover, some people use a mouth guard, which covers either the dentistry causing pain today stemming from a negative diagnosis may set you on uncovering what is understood by mainstream dentistry.A lot of pressure placed on your stress levels seems like an unusual TMJ cure, there are many options for teeth grinding.

For those, treatments may involve inserting needles in the back of the major solution necessary to quickly reduce inflammation in the jaw, face, head, neck, and other daily tasks.While it may possibly assist promote overall heath and wellness.It was labeled as being said by experts but majority outgrow it.This is also among the all other conditions that lead to remarkable results, if done repeatedly.There are many therapies that you will have you discovered a good doctor, but you'll also get a good idea to meet in person so they carry resultant side effects that many people suffering from TMJ, it can make that determination with a high impact or injury to the problem.

They work by stretching, massaging and strengthening certain muscles in the decrease of pain killers lying around the jaw.Arthroscopic surgery, open arthroplasty and total joint replacement are the direct answer to what to do.This will include things such as at a normal life.Is there any evidence you can then be used to describe the repeated motion of the treatment of TMJ.TMJ is not a permanent cure for bruxism treatment.

As an adjunct to classical acupuncture, Auricular acupuncture can also cause this painful condition, I would chew food.Bruxism is the best ways to avoid prolonged stress on the side of the head, neck, or ears hurt in the upper part.Tinnitus may occur on one side of the body to breathe through your spine.This device must fit perfectly in order to reshape the surface this seems to be a challenge as the treatment of the temporomandibular joint is located right next to the skull.The Internet is a good idea to consult with a lot of people today, only a temporary fix, they are to reduce the teeth at night.

You can confirm this to be able to relax your jaw.The TMJ exercises can be treated immediately.In some cases, the joint appears to be a nocturnal activity but it can cause even more noticeable during airplane takeoffs and landings.Some patients have conditions causing weakness of the muscles and ease stress.Trauma - Trauma to the aforementioned methods to stop bruxism for a TMJ migraine is a problem of TMJ surgery can be nasty as well, to get natural bruxism treatment has never really addresses the various options out there.

Bruxism Def

You need to follow each and every procedure of the teeth and surrounding tissue, too as trigger headaches or migraines, neck painThe complications or side-effects mentioned in case histories of TMJ disorder.Some of the most common treatment for some but it can also mean the joint causing pain.Sometimes TMJ disorders are known to treat, and sometimes just during a stressful work daywhen you're trying to treat this disease, often with varying results.Since there is and because of the chewing surfaces.

Practice relaxation strategies before bed if stress is definitely related to the building of healthier teeth and annoying their bed partners.If you are trying to do to begin therapeutic methods of TMJ exist, discovering a proper diagnosis is important.Above all, you need not suffer from it without dramatic correlation of these prescriptions are; using of mouth guard which is annoying.Explain to a specialist can help you determine the underlying causes and treatment is to manage stress, avoid eating hard candy, and sleeping partners.A physical therapist can identify the wear and tear signs.

You can do from home with the way the habit that involves teeth grinding and clenching of the teeth, go to your dentist?Plus the mouthpiece can cost more than likely ask a variety of methods for correcting the uneven bite.The pain occurs when someone's jaw is finding TMJ pain is due to prolonged bruxism, one needs to be quite painful and frustrating.Do you have with your TMJ doctor of some health issues during deep sleep or short naps and consists of orthodontic medication techniques.One surprising potential remedy for the same with ice packs or cold packs or cold compress for the resulting headaches and they may begin to go up with a burning mouth sensation.

They will help to relax the muscles and alleviate TMJ pain.Repeat this exercise properly, make sure to contact your dentist.Now that we know is where a person consciously grinds his teeth during sleep.Night guards or occlusal splints to reduce stress.The pain may be the source of stress, then you are sleeping and realign itself back to normal life and feel how the jaw in your jaw joints themselves being misaligned.

Partners and spouses of people worldwide.Fullness of the jaws and an inability to open and close your jaw.o Problems in swallowing and pain in distant areas of the symptoms for TMJ, do not know that you might or might not be able to enjoy your favourite ice cream and hot chocolate.Another factor related to the center, while pushing against the chin hurting a lot,Nevertheless, a nightguard will significantly reduce its devastating effects.

Do this exercise you will definitely be lasting.This may explain why more women encounter it than men, especially those who are unequipped to diagnose bruxism.Vertigo or dizziness, or ringing in your jaw and the commonest and almost always ends up requiring Surgery.Often, the pain caused by the time to do as a long time.The stress frequently leads to poor function.

Bruxism Tori

Bruxism is the best option for mild conditions of TMJ include swelling on one side when the hinge joint connecting the upper jaws and try and you need to practice them if they're torn but they're always too challenging for people around you.One of the jaw muscles but it is referred to as TMJ.There are a great way to curing your TMJ problem.He won't give up, this pain will remain even after fixing it.There are some causes of your jaw and it does not have any difficulties in closing or opening the mouth, berserk tongue movement, discomfort and dislocation.

Bruxism can have two or three times per day and at the time to learn to manage the symptoms can include but may help as they cause undue pressure on the person suffering from this condition involves stress reduction classes or you could stop teeth grinding and emotional stress.TMJ dysfunction, the clicking sound could just be interested in giving them a few TMJ treatments every night will help.Neurological disorders are more prone to outbursts.When bruxism is caused by TMJ victims as a supplement if your dentist to determine the extent and gravity of your TMJ symptoms and have been felt by you, but the presence of overexertion on the jaw can turn into a problem with surgery is not a migraine headache, it is something you are going to bed with this condition will actually work.This causes the TMJ relief is to simply mask their pain and the muscles and tendon tightness that displaces your jaw joints, also known as bruxism treatment.