#wip: the math isn't matching

[gasps-inspanish]

The Math Isn't Mathing

TW for mentions of underage drinking

It was the annual League check in, a big meeting they had once a fiscal year at the Hall of Justice to check in on everyone’s progress and how things were going after major events that happened that year. Usually Kyle didn’t like League meetings, but having his friends who weren’t 10+ years older than him around for this meeting always meant that the meeting wouldn’t be boring.

Kyle was standing near Hal’s seat with the rest of the Lanterns (besides Guy who was sitting down on the floor next to Hal) minus Kelli who was with Titans West. The Titans and Young Justice were also in attendance and standing with one another, and the people who didn’t have a team but were still in the League database stood behind the League member they correspond to or near a friend.

“- a painting that went missing in -xx23” Bruce was saying.

“What does a painting that went missing 40 years ago have to do with our case?” Gar asked. Rachel side eyed him and Kyle almost laughed at the severity of it.

“So, that's not how math works,” Vic pointed out and Gar rolled his eyes.

“It’s close enough,” Gar argued. Rachel’s side eye continued.

“No it’s not? It’s 24 years, you're off by like 16 years” Jaime pointed out. Tim shook his head.

“No it’s not,” Tim said and Kyle was confused.

“Yes it is? I was born that year and I’m 24” Kyle said. Tim started to analyze him and Kyle was unsettled. He wasn’t that dumb, damn Tim, but Kon was also looking at him weird.

“So I know how math works,” Wally said slowly, “and yours is off. Do you not know what year you were born”?

Hal reached back and tapped Kyle on his knee, a sign to be quiet. But Kyle wasn’t going to start another brawl with Wally in the Hall of Justice or anything, and Bruce (who was one of the few people that kind of cared about keeping the meeting on track) seemed interested, so Kyle didn’t get what Hal was so worried about.

“I know what year I was born Wally, I’m not stupid” Kyle argued. Hal tapped his knee again.

“You clearly are. You weren’t born in -xx23” Wally said. Next to him, Donna, Roy and Garth looked amused but Dick looked worried. Kyle didn’t get it. He and Wally talked like this all the time. Hal being worried about his nephew getting into a fight, okay sure, but Dick knew Kyle and Wally talked to each other like this.

“Wally, I know what year I was born. It’s basic information that I use all the time” Kyle said gently in order to hopefully placate Hal and Dick. It didn’t work, as Dick still looked worried and Hal tapped his knee again.

“You were born in August” Wally said slowly, as if Kyle was stupid or a child, and that kinda pissed Kyle off.

“Yeah” Kyle said in the same condescending tone. “August 20th, -xx23. I just turned 24”.

Hal tapped him again and Guy slapped Hal’s away.

“Let him talk Hal, he’s a big boy,” Guy said quietly. His laugh and tone of excitement made Kyle realize something was wrong.

“That’s impossible. That was the year I was born and I was born in January while you were born in August so you would be a grade behind me instead of being in the same grade as me. Meaning you would have just turned-” Wally paused, eyes widening in horror when he saw Kyle had gone rigid, realizing his mistake. “Wait a fucking second, have you been lying about your age”?

Kyle opened his mouth and then closed it. He was stupid after all. He had been so used to saying he was a year older than he was, that he hadn’t realized his birth year didn’t match. He has been lying about his age for so long that he completely forgot he lied about his age in general. Everyone was looking at him now.

“I tried to warn you,” Hal said, looking up at Kyle in amusement.

“How old are you really?” Wally asked desperately.

“Older or younger?” Roy joined in as Donna looked panicked.

“Why would you lie about your age and what year you were born, but not make sure that they worked together?” Bart asked, his hand raised. Next to him, Kon was looking between Kyle and Wally like one would a fucking tennis match.

“I didn’t lie about the year. Just now” Kyle said weakly and Wally bent over, hands on his knees as if he needed to catch his breath.

“Waitwaitwaitwaitwaitwait” Wally cried out before looking back up at Kyle. “You’re a year younger than me?”?

“No! I mean, we’re the same age until your birthday in January?” Kyle offered and Donna relaxed.

“NO-”!

Guy burst out laughing at the same time as Kon. Guy had accidentally found out a bit after Hal, and Kon didn’t know until now and was just a brat. Connor was whispering something to Kelli who had this look on her face that made Kyle nervous.

Well, more nervous.

“I told you,” Hal said again. “Play stupid games”?

“Win stupid prizes” Kyle said sadly, hanging his head in defeat.

“Wait a second, you were 20 when you became a Lantern” John asked and Kyle nodded. “Kyle, we went out drinking with you plenty of times before August -xxx2”.

“Yeah” Barry said, wide eyes with realization. “We did too”!

Uh oh.

“Who cares about that!” Wally said. “He was 20 when he joined the League! You guys said you have to be 21”!

Oh yeah, Wally hadn’t been old enough to join the League when he first became Flash, having still been 20. He was never officially a part of the League team since Barry “came back to life” before he turned 21, but Kyle had said he was 21, so he was an official Justice League team member. And Wally wasn’t.

It was a beautiful day.

“Revoke his membership” Roy joked.

“I agree!” Wally said seriously, looking like he was losing his mind. “I’m older than you? You graduated university before me”?

Maybe this wasn’t such a bad thing.

“You have a fake id,” John said looking very amused. Kyle nodded. “Let me see it”.

Oh wait no, this actually sucked.

Kyle pulled it out and handed it over, and the other Lanterns and Barry and Ollie (who sat on either side of Hal) looked at it.

“I mean- it looks legit” Simon offered and Jess laughed, not even bothering to cover her mouth with her hand as she elbowed a smirking Jo lightly..

“I don’t use it anymore” Kyle said and Guy slung an arm around Kyle.

“I’m gonna make fun of you for this for the rest of your life” Guy laughed, despite the fact that he already knew. Kyle rolled his eyes.

“Yeah, I saw that one coming”.

“And you knew about this,” John said to Hal. At least if Kyle was going down, Hal was going down with him.

“Yeah, but he stopped after I found out. That’s why we didn’t go bar hopping as a group for like, four months” Hal said. John looked like he was trying not to laugh and Kyle knew he was done for. He was getting bullied for the next month at least. He hated them all. “What?“

“Hal. He still went drinking, just when you weren’t there” John said. Hal paused before doing a slow turn in his chair, looking offended.

Kyle knew Hal was more offended that Kyle was hiding it from him than him actually doing it. Oh also there was the reason Hal recommended Kyle didn’t drink for a bit, but Kyle didn’t want to think about that.

“Would you believe me if I said it was an accident?” Kyle asked sheepishly. Wally was leaning on a laughing Garth, wailing at the unfairness of the world and something about Kyle graduating University way before him, but Kyle couldn’t even enjoy it.

He would never live this down.

Notes

[notquiteaghost]

anything left to us - harley finds jason first?

(wip ask game)

i was reading a lot of identity reveal red hood fic right when i watched birds of prey for the first time, so this is my obligatory red hood identity reveal except harley is there, as a treat :)

anything left to us is from solidarity forever because i think i'm hilarious. loose plot is by the time jason returns to gotham, harley's also free of the joker, and she swings by the safehouse of the new guy on the scene who's stolen his gimmick from her shitty ex but doesn't seem to want anything to do with her shitty ex to see what the hell all that's about, and she catches him without his helmet on, and dark-haired blue-eyed gotham native + already getting a rep for being a bleeding heart + looking at her like he's seen a ghost isn't difficult math, she's got a degree, y'know!

what i've got written atm is dick pov emotional reunion cuz DC fic is primarily my therapist but thematically the point is harley & jason wearing matching The World's Worst Clown Tried To Kill Us And All We Got Were These Shirts t-shirts