#work is actively killing me and even when im not working i cant stop thinking about it

[natasharomanoff]

i am beyond the point of burnout WOOOOO

[onereallygoodlambonastick]

how to be wary/alert without crossing over into fear? is the question

[cryptidclaw]

I find it hilarious that you had the chance to make mapleshade a complex character but instead you her more “redeemable” which she isn’t redeemable you just made her morally correct. Like no one is going to say she’s was in the wrong for killing the people that caused the death of her and her literally KITS!

Like stop pretending that’s she’s redeemable. She’s not. Anyone with an amount of empathy is not going to think she’s a evil witch. like what’s there to redeem? No like seriously?

And all the other female characters in this au are either little goody two-shoes or a Side bitch to the male characters. (Leopard and Ivy)

That’s all.

Uh ? huh????

Idk if i even want to dignify this with a response bec this is stupid but ig I will???

First off, why are u getting so heated over fantasy cats? if you dont like my au, just block me I dont give a shit.

Second, this is my au and I do what I want.

Third, since when have the female characters in this au been "goody two shoes" or "side bitches" ???? like what the fuck are you on about??? Leopard is her own person who makes her own decisions, Ivy doesn't hang out with any guys?? except for Hawkfrost Ig?? but like thats her evil dad and that also happens in canon???

Squirrelflight and Leafpool are both in-depth characters that Im obsessed with??? uhhh idk who else you could be talking about????

If anything I am actively trying to make the female characters more complex than in canon. so ... i dont understand what you are saying.

Onto talking about ur Maple claims. I dont fully understand what you are getting at? Are you saying that she was already redeemable (because she absolutely wasn't) or are you saying that she cant be redeemable (bec that's fair)?

I do somewhat regret using the term "redeemable" for RoC Maple, bec Im more so trying to give her a gray character characterization. She is in many ways still a horrible person. she is still a serial killer and enjoys haunting and tormenting people, even if those cats "deserve" it doesnt meant that its okay to do that. She is filled with hate, and anger and she is never able to free herself from that. So, ya she's not a goody two shoes she kills and tortures people.

HOWEVER, her backstory and motivation gives her the potential to be far more "good side" leaning. I feel like it really works for the themes of RoC for her to be on the side of the main characters rather than the villains. Her being a vengeful spirit that guides those she relates to and sees her kits in makes since, and really works for the au, especially since I am exploring how the Stars aren't all perfect and good, and the Dark Forest isnt pure evil.

Also I would like to point out that a LOT of people think that Mapleshade is an "evil witch" and despise her so ... ya.

[yourbpdgf]

Izana & Mikey with a Tsukasa like s/o!!

another req from my old blog. i loved writing this so much bro <3333

Izana <3

• izana loves your personality so much

• somebody that doesnt act like a little bitch after killing someone???? sign him tf up.

• despite this, the first time it happens hes a lil bit disturbed..

• but after that?? yall are partners in crime, like bonnie and clyde type beat.

when you and izana were only about a month into dating, a smaller gang leader decided it was a good idea to try and challenge tenjikus king, your boyfriend, izana. since izana knew said gang leader was weak he declined his challenge deeming it a waste of time. this pissed the little bitch gang leader off, so once izana turned his back he tried to hit him, and that pissed you the fuck off.

"you know...," you leered, grabbing your kitchen knife, "only little bitches try to hit people when their backs are turned." and with that you jumped on him. short legs straddling him, right arm plunging the kitchen knife in and out of izanas attackers body.

izana turned around shocked, but shock soon turned into delight. his beautiful little s/o can kick ass?? hell yeah your in tenjiku now :) .

(oh and dw the body was properly disposed of <3)

• i know canonically izanas not too tall hes 5'4 but i feel like hed be taller like atleast 5'9 max 6'2

• let me dream ok

• so ur a certified arm rest for him :p

• no fr yall could be doing physically anything and this mf could just go "oh hey y/n *places arm on head*"

• and ur not even mad about it your just like "oh hey iza :D!!"

• but to sum it up ur the bonnie to his clyde and ur also his favorite little arm rest <33

Mikey <3

• ok so this kinda depends on what mikey were talking about

• for your height it probably wouldnt make a difference

• he hated when people used to make fun of his height so i cant imagine him doing it to you

• moving onto your lil episodes

• bonten mikey just wouldnt give a flying fuck, as long as you love him he couldnt care less 🤷‍♀️

mikey gave you a job to go kill some traitors with sanzu, and you... uhm.. had a lil episode.

"how" stab "dare" stab "you" stab "betray" stab "MIKEY!"

little did you know manjiro was in the doorway chomping on some dorayaki, watching you work.

when the job was done, and you saw him you immediately ran to him. you hugged him, gave him a few kisses for good measure, and took a bite out of his dorayaki bc he always gets the bestest ones <3.

mikey just wants you to love and care for him, other than that he could care less about your urges.

• but toman mikey would feel so much more comfortable with you after knowing about ur episodes

• that last one might not make any sense but let me explain

• you remember when mikey almost killed kazutora? obviously he has little black outs where he tries to kill people with no remorse too.

• so if his s/o was like that hed be able to help stop them and also connect and open up to them about his impulses!

• i feel like that makes so much sense im so smart oml

• as for height i cant think hed do anything but make u try and reach his lips for a kiss

• like he wont willingly bend so u can kiss him ur either gonna have to pull him down or get up on ur tiptoes im sorry :p

you and mikey just got home from gang activities school and youre feeling a little clingier than usual. so you and mikey were cooking dinner you asked for a kiss, just to be met with a smug mikey.

"manjiro frickin sano just bend your head down just a little bit!" you whine, trying to stir the pot and kiss him at the same time.

mikey laughs, smugly straightening his back to appear taller, "if you want a kiss so badly just get one baby im not stopping you ;p"

"MIKEY-"

"Y/N THE POT THE POT-"

• yeah so the rice was a little burnt but you and mikey both love and understand eachother in the end (burnt rice included) <3

masterpost

[themichaelvan]

why nearly every character in all of the fnaf musicals are insane in distinctly different but still very much insane ways: an essay

(this is like 80% from memory and its. checks time 2:15am as of writing this so excuse inaccuracies.)

mark: oh my god starting off with a bang, are we? okay okay. he was there for ONE NIGHT. one. one night. he spent like basically all of it crying in the corner because of puppets. theyre puppets. freddy is literally punted across the room on multiple occasions YOU ARE A FULL GROWN ADULT MARK. "in all my dreams i see / a maze of halls with bloody walls / and countless scrawls reminding me "it's me!"" YOU WERE THERE FOR ONE NIGHT. he IMMEDIATELY decides that the solution to this is not 1) taking it up with his manager 2) just fucking quitting bUT INSTEAD THAT ITS 3) BRING A DUFFEL BAG FULL OF WEAPONS, INCLUDING SEVERAL KNIVES AND GUNS TO HIS WORKPLACE INTENDING TO KILL THE ANIMATRONICS YOU WERE HIRED TO PROTECT. AND THEN THE ONLY THING HE DID TO CHANGE HIS IDENTITY AFTER NEARLY KILLING A MAN AND GETTING CAUGHT WAS TO DYE HIS HAIR. he didnt even change his ADDRESS. dipshit. he acts all tough and crap afterward too like he spent 40 years in prison. he was reduced to literal actual tears by puppets. god i love him so much.

nate: sassed the man holding a knife to one of the animatroniocs he, AGAIN, was HIRED to PROTECT. drove the animatronics to a man they KNOW is willing to use guns to protect himself in the FIRST PLACE. also he just ??? fuckign Had bb on hand like. did they give him bb when he quit the first time?? like. okay. say you have to distract an easily distracted but immensely murderous animatronic and your first thought is "hmm what if i use that rc car that looks like a child from my old workplace". bitch if its been 7 years since i worked there and witnessed a traumatizing event im gonna bury that fucker at the bottom of my closet not just have it with me. also his first concern when he was faced with a very much "i am going to die" situation is that he hasnt caught up on a tv show yet???? nate buddy please i appreciate you but get some self-worth and some therapy while youre at it

aj: he was nearly killed by an animatronic as big as he was, stopped only by like a foot or smth, and then IMMEDIATELY accepted the transfer to ANOTHER place with animatronics in it like. why would you actively choose to keep working with fazbear entertainment. im sure literally any other company ever would look at aj "nearly killed two men because he wanted to work more hours" purple guy and hire him in a millisecond. SPEAKING OF WHICH, HE NEARLY KILLED TWO MEN BECAUSE HE WANTED TO WORK MORE HOURS. DO YOU NEED THE MONEY THAT BADLY OR DO YOU JUST REALLY FUCKING. WANT TO WORK AT FAZBEARS THAT MUCH. i honeslty cant decide which is worse. he also mocked the guy with a chainsaw who burst through the wall not ten minutes before??? who was also like 2 feet away from him???? what were you EXPECTING him to do??????????????????? give you more hours????????????????????????

phone guy: yeah.

mike: looked at the absolute flaming dumpster fire that was the lawsuits, filthy animatronics, extremely low budget, and EXTREMELY sketchy boss that was the new fazbears and said "yeah i can work with this." also i think he got killed by pan stan which is such a sad way to go my god. i dont have quite as much to say about him but i DO love him very much and he REALLY SHOULD HAVE gotten a better job.

lizzy: other than the fact she hasnt quit fazent yet (which is excusable considering it looks like shes looking into the sketchy stuff and is probably mostly there for mikes death), actually not that bad. props to her tbh if i had to deal with a boss like phone guy id go considerably more feral.

those police officers who showed up for like 2 scenes in the og fnaf musical: just fucking, like. let an actual murder perp ESCAPE because they Forgot To Lock The Car And Went To Go Get Food and then just. DIDNT REPORT IT. because this, apparently, is NOT the first time theyve let someone escape, and because theyd LOSE THEIR JOBS IF THEY REPORTED IT. if the police is THAT bad in this town no fucking wonder phone guy's gotten away with everything so far.

[pekodayz]

🌟😍💋💐💕☕️

offic- *gunshot* all of these will be that thx u.....

🌟: Who’s the tease in the relationship?

neither. theres something about them that makes it hard to make sexual remarks. oso calls aini flat in front of 5 ppl, aini makes fun of his boner at work in front of them too. they both start awkwardly laughing. scratching their arm. whole office laughs at them. oaky.. aini takes her break, oso follows. they start blaming each other on who fucked up the hardest, that was so embarrassing for them. ig when theyre drunk, oso would prob feel aini, just a bit. they agree on 5 secs, he touches her thigh, she touches his thigh. they get red and stop, busting out laugh and screaming. they walk home in shame.

😍: Name your three favorite things about your f/o

aini likes that oso is taller than her (4-5 inches), so she can stand behind him when they get caught skipping work, so he can get the blame. ough. ok she likes it when he puts his chin on her shoulder while she's staring at her computer. dead eyes. shes not gonna make it obv. nagging her to work faster, bugging her to help him with smth, can u print this out for me, im tired. yeah yeah. aini also likes it when oso uh persuades her to skip work, she enjoys being out with him for a day (even if that means not going to work, she doesnt care...she likes the company. secretly) aini likes that oso's color is red, bc she likes red too. they were like omg coincidence, pointing at each other uwahhh omggeee. then they argue on who owns it. whomp whomp.

💋: Where are your favorite places to kiss your f/o/where are their favorite places to kiss you?

they haven't kissed on the lips oughh. oso only kissed aini's forehead when she was sobbing for some reason and they were hugging. uh. even that almost killed them both. aini kissed oso's cheek once, as a joke. tsundere mode activated ew. i think aini had a fav spot, it would be her neck. oso would love aini kissing him just anywhere. thats not happening tho for either of them....unless theyre like drunk. super duper duper duper rare moment maybe. then they freak out. cooties. ewwww. then theyll prob be like...okay one more...looking stupid. shaking and sweating (fear), then they pass out.

💐: How did you two meet?

answered here :3

💕: Who’s the clingier one in the relationship?

both of them. cuddle when theyre on the train. (none of their coworkers can see them)uh aini lays her head on oso's lap sometimes....he strokes her hair or smth ugh. (they think this is what close friends do. to cope) aini has oso come over, they cuddle there, privately. ew......theyre arguing tho, so its okay. balances it out.

☕: How do you comfort each other on a bad day?

when aini is like super sad, oso can tell. since shes putting up a fake smug front. shes sulking all day at work aw. then when theyre walking out together, she cant rly look at him in the eye. trying to not cry like a baby to him. shes choking up sobs.. then she does. slams her face into his chest and muffle cries. he just holds her as she sobs and he says somethings to her.. big brother instincts isuppose. aini gets all weak mode and holds his hand, sniffling and stuff.

aini sees oso is dif. she knows he doesnt really like to talk abt his feelings, so she just has some mutual understanding with him. he knows. he doesnt snap around her, they go out for drinks. she doesnt insult him at all, he feels better eventually. he'll tell her some other time...

[spaciebabie]

PLEASE tell me about your oc lore that comic was SO INTERESTING I'm on my hands and knees begging for more pls

THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU FOR THIS ASK I LOVE TALKING ABT MY OCS SM

I HADTA GET MY NOTES OUT FOR THIS ONE!

RANT UNDER READ MORE CUZ IT CONTAINS SPOILERS (EVEN THO IM PURPOSFULLY VAGUE) AND ITS ALSO A LOT

my GOD katherine quin- MY TRAGIC PROTAGONIST BABY WHO FEELS LIKE SHE ALWAYS HAS TA DO SOMTHIN ABT THE SITUATION EVEN THO SHE'S JUST A KID

i LOVE slow burns so everything in the story takes a moment ta kick off. you have katherine, "curiosity killed the kat" quin n her perfect parents, perfect friends n perfect life. everything is good. she's a kookie middleschooler abt ta go ta highschool, she's president of the history club, she's designated as the LEADER of the rexica manor field trip b/c of how dedicated she is ta learning abt their history.

she goes on the trip! it goes great, stupendous even! she comes home!! her parents are unreasonably upset for no reason b/c of a specifc thing that happens that i dont wanna spoil EERURUERUGUEGUEUGR

and she ends up learning a horrible truth. she's like, "i feel like we should do something now, with this thing i aquired maybe i can do something." n ppl keep telling her ta, "leave it ta the adults" "what are you even going ta do?", "everything is already in motion you just hafta wait till it all falls inta place" but-

FROM HER POV THE ADULTS HAVE BEEN STAGNANT, AWARE OF THE PROBLEM FOR 20+ YEARS N HAVENT BEEN DOING ANYTHING (spoilers? this is the incorrect mindset)

so she goes n does something STUPID. she directly puts herself in harms way, she puts herself in the forefront of the action b/c she thinks she can do somthing and the adults are forced ta acknowledge her b/c of this. they're forced ta include her even though they dont want to. again another child has decided that they want ta b involved in an ADULT MATTER and the only way they can make sure she n the other dumb kids stay alive is ta involve them so that they can watch over them.

time passes, a new character joins the fray. a deranged lunatic who will stop at nothing ta get what they want. they fucking flip the WHOLE WELL PLANNED OUT OPERATION THAT HAS BEEN IN THE WORKS FOR 20+ YEARS ON ITS HEAD AND KAT TURNS INTA A DIRECT TARGET.

people are hunting her. they want her dead. the police are aligned w/a new corrupt government that are after the thing she has designated herself ta protect (notice how i said, "herself" THE ADULTS DO NOT WANT HER TA PROTECT THIS THING) she's a fugative. she's an outlaw. she's protecting something the public percieves as dangerous, but she knows its not. her parents cant help her, n while she does have adults there ta aid her its obvi not the same. she misses her parents so much, she's stressed trying not ta get caught n die, having ta move from place ta place b/c of the threat of being recognized n the constant raids on the places she's at. i think that her birthday falls w/in this timeframe so like,,,,imagine trying ta celebrate your sweet 16 when your government is actively out hunting you.

AWFUL ANGSTY JUST THE WAY I LIKE IT

I HAVE HAD THIS WHOLE STORY PLANNED OUT SINCE I WAS 14 OH MY GOD I FUCKING LOVE THIS ARC!! ITS THE ANGSTIEST ARC OF THEM ALL AND AFTERWARDS THE CHARACTERS HAFTA SPEND THE NEXT ARC HEALING FROM THIS HORRIBLE THING WHILE DANGER STILL LOOMS IN THE DISTANCE.

THEY'RE IRREPERABLY SCARRED. PHYSICALLY, MENTALLY, KAT IS NOT THE ONLY ONE WHO SUFFERS FROM THIS!

and the best part of it is that some of it is her fault

[ludinusdaleth]

Hey Van, I've followed you on twitter for a while and always look forward to seeing your thoughts on Artagan, CR, and such. I didn't see anything from you when the February Artagan comic came out, and realized I hadn't seen anything at all from you in about a month. Twitter said your account was just gone and I got really worried. I saw you were still reblogging and posting on here and just wanted to check and see if you're okay since queues can keep running for a while. Hope you’re alright.

howdy. i am honestly humbled a few folk have checked on me. generally i am fine. i think twitter just had enough of me and nuked my account. and honestly, that's for the best. it's hard to really escape an app that brings you utmost stress and yet is by nature addictive. but i guess i have, now. i was at my precise wits end with realizing i was seen as a fandom leader, who needed to know everything, who was looked up to and was non. stop. asked every question imaginable of discoursing or seriously personal nature - people cant function that way even if some folk are kind to you. only so many people can ask me to stop them from killing themselves or what i think about some deeply parasocial drama before i feel deader than a corpse. it's been a month or so since and while the world at large and even this site are still very much on fire.... i dunno, it's easier to tackle, to exist as a person, without the bird app actively designed to drain any goodwill or tolerance out of us. the only thing i miss about it is some proof of my ancient cr theories. thats a stunning realization.

once again i thank those that check up on me. i hope anyone who finds my tumblr account realizes i wish to be a nobody more desperately than they can imagine, and work best with a boundary of Just Existing in place, and im happier for not being on twitter anymore.

[protagonistheavy]

I cant stress enough how annoying the OW2 PvE shit is. It's a kind of incompetency from a production standpoint that I just cant stand -- it's outright deceptive marketing, telling people for YEARS to get hyped for all this PvE content, only to pull it out from under the userbase's feet.

It was THE thing that a sequel was sold on. That whole animated cinematic with the giant robot and showing off new abilities and getting Overwatch together. Just a total waste of time now, huh.

It's fucking skill trees, too. Was that really too fucking complicated for them to handle? They couldnt just make a web of abilities and bonuses and let you have fun with them, they couldnt figure out how to do that in time. I mean seriously, it's SKILL TREES, every fucking video game has them, it's such a simple thing and Blizzard finds a way to make its users feel like fucking idiots for even wanting/expecting that much.

It sucks for me especially because for the past month I've been brainrotting about what PvE would look like. I was amped imagining all the skill tree combinations, the new mechanics, the possibility of a weapon system to totally change how heroes might play, the gameplay in which you'd get materials to craft upgrades, various items you'd find or bring along on missions... Of course, we get none of that, we get nothing. We get more Archives bullshit, just more linear straightforward missions of horde killing with a few elites.

I just look back and know now that I was silly to think we were getting a good product even at SOME point. How naive I was to not realize how the PvP content and battlepass clearly had all the attention/budget, leaving no time or energy for PvE. I mean lmao, stupid me, for thinking Blizzard could incorporate skill trees, when they showed it off in gameplay trailers and footage as totally functioning. Stupid me for not thinking "oh obviously theyre just gonna scrap this whole aspect of the game."

Disappointment doesnt even begin to describe how I feel. This is just plainly tragic at this point. The dreams back from Overwatch 2016 are just gone now lol. Such a great game with so much potential, wasted. I really cannot imagine myself playing the game anymore at this rate, PvP was barely keeping my interest as a time-passer, but now that the shine has worn off, even that is just dull and uninteresting. I was waiting for PvE, really thought I'd be able to re-engage with the game if I knew that was coming out, but if it's just going to be the same Archives shit with, what, ooooh solo player missions? Yeah fuck off. I wanted real PvE! I wanted to maximize heroes and obtain new abilities and discover fun combos and feel like Im active in the story of Overwatch! But they can't do it! Blizzard just totally dropped that ball and it's taken them years to come out and admit it.

All in all, I just really want to know why Blizzard hates Overwatch's story so much. Why do they constantly keep compromising it. For the sake of PvP? Do they just constantly worry that if they stop making content for PvP for just a little bit, the whole game will die? They put millions of dollars into Overwatch League only for that to effectively capsize within two years, but the most they can do for Overwatch's lore is a few shitty kids books over the span of years? And all these resources they made -- they had a whole fucking demo for PvE content in 2019! All that, just gone? At best recycled for more Archives bullshit? Fuck! Why even ass around and pretend you HAVE a story? Why not just say fuck you a little louder and scrap ALL story content, clearly Blizzard doesn't want to even be engaging with story content so why keep tugging us along acting like one day we're gonna get it? Jesus fucking Christ. How can they do this to their own staff? Making them work on so much bullshit that gets flushed down a toilet. Why even bother. Why even make these people go through the effort of even thinking about story content when it's plainly something that's never gonna happen. Oh my fucking god.

[thoughts-and-gayers]

ive been thinking about civil rights recently, specifically trans rights, as thats a marginalized group im a part of thats actively being hurt. i see people talking about the awful things done to trans people, the hate speech, the bills signed into law that make it dangerous for us to even exist. its terrifying to me, to think that im going to be leaving high school and entering a world that actively wants to kill me.

i just watched jessie gender's multi-hour video on jk rowling, and it articulated so many of my thoughts about transness in our. current society that i had no idea how to say. one thing she emphasized was how talking about these specific people, these little one-off incidents, is counterproductive. obviously things like hogwarts legacy and "what is a woman" matter, but should we really be talking about them as much as we are when anti-trans bills are passed faster than we can keep track of?

the way our society is right now, short and snappy thoughts about those tiny 24 hour stories are the only thing that gets attention. when you talk about trans rights, youre saying "dont support harry potter", youre not saying "stop the us government from actively hurting trans people".

but people dont listen when you talk about the big stuff. talking about the latest drama is much more entertaining than talking about the actual horrors that people are facing. we're at a point where we can call pointing and laughing at bigots a form of activism.

its so much easier not to learn about the deeper issues. for non-marginalized folk especially, supporting the marginalized celebrity is a lot easier than addressing systematic issues. but we dont get that privilege. we have to go to bat for the big shit, with or without allies. we dont get the luxury, the privilege, of not taking the time to understand and address bigotry and its sources.

im so tired. its exhausting even just learning about everything thats happening. and im not out of high school yet, so theres not a lot i can actually do out there. im trying to learn everything i can about everything thats happening, and its just so exhausting, all the time. on top of that, i also spend my energy on educating other people, trying to get them to understand what's taken me hours of work to get to myself.

and as a white person, i cant even imagine how much harder it must be for POC, especially when they exist at intersections of queerness, womanhood, disability, and/or more. im trying my best to learn about specific struggles that don't necessarily apply to me, but theres so much that a lot of the time i dont even know where to start.

cis, straight, male, white, abled, allo; people who fall under these dont have an obligation to learn about any marginalized group theyre not a part of, especially if theyre not a part of any of them. but they can still go online and say "fuck celebrity x" and get lauded as the pinnacle of allyship. they can make short, snappy, performative displays of their helpfulness without putting in any of the work to actually help. they have the privilege to do so. i as a white person have the privilege to do so, even if i try not to.

im so scared to go out into the world after i graduate and face all these inequalities, to try and deal with the horrors that high school and the internet have only been a small taste of. the most i can do is learn as much as i can before then, but i lose the motivation to every day when theres so little i can do to help; when the people who can help choose to do nothing anyway.

and this post, the closest thing my hungover ass can get to an in-depth analysis, likely wont get any attention at all. its not short, its not snappy, its not entertaining. its just a teenage nonbinary lesbian ranting about existential dread for way longer than he probably should have. and no, this isnt me begging for a reblog otherwise youre a bad person. saying stuff like that doesnt help anyway, since people would just snuff it out of spite instead of looking at the overall message. its just the way things are, not just here but everywhere.

im just so scared, and tired, and sad, and angry, all the fucking time.

[kodev]

MY GOODNESS THATS SO IN DEPTH!! Love it!! Few more things sorry for putting them all in one ask

1) I have absolutely 0 previous mahoyaku knowledge so it was vaguely word salad to me like. I got the gist but if you wish to elaborate (mahoyaku for dummies)

2) Relationship chart would be awesome yes

3) I LOVE THESE GUYS. I'm shaking them around they're so well thought out and cool seriously seriously so excited to see the game!

okay first off i am so sorry for this like month late response... im currently a high school senior in the midst of college apps season haha so i havent had time to really do anything T__T my apologies again... and thank u for the questions! i will literally talk about mhyk for ages if enabled lol. word dump below

mhyk for dummies: mahoyaku is a pretty boy mobage. i am so sorry i just need to get that out there. anyways two things that *i* think that set it apart from other mobages is its not an otome so you cant date any of the characters AND its got more of a focus on non-romantic pairings i guess? idk if that makes sense but it does show and i do greatly enjoy the relationships (platonic, romantic, or whatever the fuck) between a lot of the characters since imo its very well written. even if i havent been keeping up with any of the stories. ALSO since its in a wizard universe they do some pretty cool things with gender... dont want to say they are nonbinary but the creator did confirm that gender works differently for wizards. Highly enjoyable. Also a lot of bisexuals but some of them embarass me

ANYWAYS its a wizard world... wizards are born as like um.. idk theyre pretty rare unless its hereditary i think but i would say out of 100 random human babies one of them is a wizard. this comes with neat perks like: magic! immortality as long as you dont get killed (tbf its very hard to get killed if youre magic but wtv)! trying to think of other perks but really i think thats it! it also has cons like: a lot of people fucking hate you for no reason if they find out youre a wizard! and if you make a promise and break it you lose all ur magic :(. wizards turn into mana stones when they die (pretty rocks, also the gacha currency which is really fucking funny), which other wizards can eat to gain power or humans can use to power magic tools. ppl wont find out youre a wizard unless you start using magic or youre there long enough so that ppl r like "Hey its been 50 years why is this guy not aging". (ofc u only STOP aging after u hit ur magic peak but thats only a fun bit of trivia that isnt super relevant? idk)

before i get into anything else: there are 5 countries (north, east, south, west, central, very creatively named ik ik). north is a brutal country, the idea of survival of the fittest is probably taken to the extreme there, although there are some exceptions. its "ruled" by whoever the reigning wizards are there at the time, which leads to some pretty insane northern wizards! so muchmental illness. east has probably the worst of wizard hating, very forested country and ppl there tend to be pretty isolated/keep to themselves but witch? wizard? hunts are fairly common there. probably worst place societally to live as a wizard. south is the nicest place to live out of the five sort of... i think in recent history the coal miners overthrew the feudal lords so the entirety of south is still sort of being actively developed, its kind of barren but also not? idk. wizards and humans live in harmony in south, but as a result, the wizards there are also known for being really weak and err... "softhearted" in comparison. western country is full of insane people. they also generally dont like wizards but if youre funny enough theyll enjoy you. western is sort of steampunky as a result of being like the idk tech capital of the wizard world. most western wizards are fucking insane but in a really benevolent and cute way. im skipping over an insane amount of worldbuilding btw HELP umm theres nuance to all of these places nods nods im kind of just giving the broad strokes here. anyways finally central! i love central. sort of the trading hub of the world. had a famous revolution led by wizards about 100 years ago and there was wizard jesus christ. anyways wizard jesus christ gets betrayed by his closest friend, his closest friend burns him at the stake, the revolution fails but then his closest friend rewrites history to portray wizard jesus christ as a saint and also to say that the revolution wasnt for wizards but rather against the reigning king by humans? i love central rev btw such interesting worldbuilding... sedespa and aapeli from my game aare from central rev. ANYWAYS thats probably the closest i can get to the mhyk for dummies < guy who didnt talk about the pplot or characters of mahoyaku at all.

also the moon is evil and tries to kill everyone once a year they call it the great calamity. not super relevant for my game but very relevant for mahoyaku.

RELATIONSHIP CHAAAAART:

had to make this quickly sorry lol THANK U FORASKING AGAINNN

[tsui-no-sora]

yes i can and will call you out out, im stealing the revive book i am singlehandedly reviving cringe culture /j

i mean. cdream is a caffeine addict, it's basically canon if you ask me, i am now having a very vivid image of cdream sat in a heap of books and note papers drinking coffee straight from the pot as punz anxiously hovers at the edge of said pile, clutching a bag of steadily cooling McPuffNuggets.

yeah the odds for a full 100% happy ending for cfiances are Slim, especially since they're all at uh. very different lore wrap up stages. the lnv finale is very likely going to be the end of quackity's character. the odds for cdream dying or /p dreamnap somehow reconciling in that stream are even lower than the fiances wedding so it's definitely not gonna be the narrative end for sapnap. and im not even touching ckarl with a ten feet pole. i saw the ghost post btw, i am very much hoping that ccq isn't just gonna kill his character off entirely. atleast he's gonna wrap his story up, which is something which i've only heard a few ccs talk about. rip cranboo i guess. literally.

honestly, if we're looking at the scene from a doylist perspective the most likely interpretation is proabably just that ccsapnap wasn't prepared to rp a mental flip on his fiance And his murderhobo bestie. in character he probably he just filed it away for later when he wasn't actively preparing to fight dream.

don't worry finn, we all have our c!diskduo demons hidden away in the tumblr drafts. mine probably are the polar opposite of yours but the point still stands.

i mean you don't have to agree obviously, but i think inconsolable established firmly that wilbur had no fucking clue that dream had gotten out of prison. even if you consider the possibility of him lying to tommy, the fantasy sequence made it pretty clear that he still expected dream to be locked inside the prison. so it's either train talk or prison visit. i still haven't gotten around to rewatching that scene, i'll let you know what i think once i do.

csam has to make the ultimate decision between stopping the collapse of las nevadas and bringing cdream a bacon and cheese sandwich as quackity watches in despair. take a guess what he chooses. i wonder if csam has any plans to end his character.

i mean especially cdteam is also a complicated, tangled and angry mess, but yeah q and sam had care but also this very business like and scary.y vibe to them. i would genuinely kill to see a confrontation between them during that stream now that both underwent very drastic changes in mentality (for the worse or for the bettter.

im genuinely trying to keep my expectations low and simple, even though i fear that the first is probably a disservice to ccquackity's work and i literally cant help the second.

I'm not depressed" TikTok audio which I mean pretty fitting for them

I really wonder if that's actually going to be the ending of the character I have the feeling like the most lore based ccs are trying to wrap up their lore already which I don't know if it's in preparation for the second season because Foolish did say he was getting near his last streams for the first season but he called it that directly implying that whatever the world altering event is will lead to the second season and well Wilbur had said that while the lore will be done with his character he would still be around so maybe Quackity will still be around just with less serious lore which a ghost character could work pretty well for that

C!Ranboo is so dead he's just so dead but I really wanted to know what his deal with c!Dream was c'mon at least tell me that man

I really am so confused on what direction the dsmp is going to go

Yeah that's probably pretty true but now I don't know when to really chuck things up to eh it's just the streamers improving because not everything is that serious because after seeing how specific their scripts got at points during the tribute video I think I may have severly underestimated that point in the past

The latest one I had was like a 5 page essay on c!Dream c!Tommy and obsession that I was so close to posting but that I held back on because maybe society just isn't ready for it just yet and the other one was c!Dream c!Ranboo c!Tommy and The Plan that was pretty much just me crying because c!Tommy c!Ranboo friendship matters to me but so does c!Endersmile

So yeah I bet they are complete opposites on almost every regard to ironically I feel like we agree the most on c!Tommy himself

I guess I didn't see it as what he was expecting the most just as what he was one more used to and what made more sense because well in a real setting if c!Dream wanted to kill c!Wilbur it wouldn't really be a difficult task for him to do so therefore what made more sense in my brain is yeah his fantasy takes place here because it's the only possible place it could occur in c!Wilbur killing c!Dream like that and c!Quackity and c!Sam torturing him like that are things that could only happen there makes it all the more imperative that he stays there

But on that case train talk it's what makes more sense because c!Sam didn't really let other people visit c!Dream c!Sapnap did say that getting past him for any visit at all was incredibly difficult so I don't think he would have left c!Wilbur in

Honestly if that did happen in lore I would just be cheering on for c!Dream getting his cool moment of revenge I think he's earned it by now and I don't think he does whenever he brings up c!Sam or any of his other dsmp oriented proyects it's only to talk about what more things he wants to do to my knowledge he hasn't really spoken ever about putting an end to the server or to any of his characters and I don't really think he wants to he seems to have a lot of fun in it and he's part of the members who have been on it the longest after all

C!Dteam are everything to me and also have so many issues that I just don't know how their happy ending could go but I'm still holding onto for hope okay

C!Sam and c!Quackity confrontation just really calls to me because look at all the awful things they did together they both know the other is capable on some pretty inhumane things a business relationship like that is dangerous and seeing how different they are now than when they first met it would just be cool to hear them talk about it

[sheshirkat]

Okay so autism rant; first things first I'm undiagnosed, will try to see a good psychiatrist because so far its been hard being diagnosed for anything because I have shit loads of trauma and its hard to detect anything just in case its been trauma induced. Though i do have the instinct since very long i dont see the world like neurotypical people do and have shit lots of trouble adapting. I considered adhd, ocd, borderline...but the thing that regroups really most of my "symptoms" is autism and while talking to actually autistic people I found that I relate to a lot of things. Took the aspic test too went up to 145. Idk whatever.

My mom says I wasnt that way as a kid and since its something that you are since childhood it would be weird but she also thinks I might be HPI which from what I understand is really close to autism in many ways.

My theory is that maybe if I "wasn't like that" as a kid its because I was like that, but never learned how to mask. I grew up in a hippie household, between countryside and travels in India and my mom was so fucking sweet and encouraging towards everything. I was allowed my place to play and invent and to believe - she wanted my to really be a kid fully and I believed in fairies and a lot of things hardcore and she encouraged it and still does. I wanted to be a writer (still do) and never once did she tell me it wasnt possible or anything. I felt I was different at school, not really understanding the "we're friends and then we arent anymore" part of childhood and having had incredibly deep friendships for that age; I always preferred one on one time even then and felt a bit weird in groups. But I hung out a lot with adults, friends of my mom's and I created a lot and was allowed to express myself, even when I was crying or angry. So i never learned how to mask maybe because it didn't occur to my mom to tell me to stop doing certain things and on the contrary she encouraged me to be me because to her just being highly sensitive especially to nature and being expressive and HERE a lot (i was a very active kid) was okay I just was me. And then I started middle school and that was completely wtf. New social codes, now having good grades wasn't cool and I was bullied and then there was the popular girl things and the sexual harrasment (weird middle school). And then I went through high school in the city. And then adulting. And I only feel at ease and myself, truly, in nature bc i dont have to conform.

I have no idea how to conform it hurts me deeply to do so. Had an apprenticeship in animation for kids, worked 9am - 6pm the people forming us were treating us like shit and we, the apprentices all agreed on that but it seemed so easy for the others to just go along and fake it they were like "well we dont have a choice and its over soon so whatever" when personnally I couldnt eat, had panic attacks almost every evening, vomited in the morning.... i'm good at face keeping, like I can cry and the next moment act like im really happy and eager but it terribly hurts me to do so it tires me and while my smile expands my brain is shooting fucking explosions and I hate it.

So yeah. If I'm autistic I just didn't learn how to mask as a kid and when I try to even when necessary it kills me and I can't maintain it long term anyway. Its like with exams at university. I can be efficient as fuck but I'm not good at playing like its easy like I'll be hyper snappy and sometimes rude and tired and cant keep up with basic shit like eating or teeth brushing. The only job/shit life shit where you have to mask i felt a bit at ease with was last year in an animation center for kids cause the colleages were super sweet and there was this thing like the boss told us - we have kids we're very responsible and we show nothing if we're distressed in front of kids and parents but together we can take a time together at the end of the day to debrief and let go and if we're having a rough day we can say it arriving in the morning and help each other during the day. That shit was honest and real and i feel fucking lucky i experienced that.

[themichaelvan]

I posted 5,387 times in 2022

That's 5,387 more posts than 2021!

268 posts created (5%)

5,119 posts reblogged (95%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@schmope-is-dead

@nachosforfree

@miiilowo

@fazbear-ent-official

@cherry-flavored-content

I tagged 3,060 of my posts in 2022

Only 43% of my posts had no tags

#favorite - 188 posts

#👀 - 149 posts

#goose tag - 88 posts

#inspo - 77 posts

#important - 50 posts

#server tag - 42 posts

#me - 37 posts

#prev - 26 posts

#blazed post tag - 25 posts

#prev tags - 23 posts

Longest Tag: 124 characters

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My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

why nearly every character in all of the fnaf musicals are insane in distinctly different but still very much insane ways: an essay

(this is like 80% from memory and its. checks time 2:15am as of writing this so excuse inaccuracies.)

mark: oh my god starting off with a bang, are we? okay okay. he was there for ONE NIGHT. one. one night. he spent like basically all of it crying in the corner because of puppets. theyre puppets. freddy is literally punted across the room on multiple occasions YOU ARE A FULL GROWN ADULT MARK. "in all my dreams i see / a maze of halls with bloody walls / and countless scrawls reminding me "it's me!"" YOU WERE THERE FOR ONE NIGHT. he IMMEDIATELY decides that the solution to this is not 1) taking it up with his manager 2) just fucking quitting bUT INSTEAD THAT ITS 3) BRING A DUFFEL BAG FULL OF WEAPONS, INCLUDING SEVERAL KNIVES AND GUNS TO HIS WORKPLACE INTENDING TO KILL THE ANIMATRONICS YOU WERE HIRED TO PROTECT. AND THEN THE ONLY THING HE DID TO CHANGE HIS IDENTITY AFTER NEARLY KILLING A MAN AND GETTING CAUGHT WAS TO DYE HIS HAIR. he didnt even change his ADDRESS. dipshit. he acts all tough and crap afterward too like he spent 40 years in prison. he was reduced to literal actual tears by puppets. god i love him so much.

nate: sassed the man holding a knife to one of the animatroniocs he, AGAIN, was HIRED to PROTECT. drove the animatronics to a man they KNOW is willing to use guns to protect himself in the FIRST PLACE. also he just ??? fuckign Had bb on hand like. did they give him bb when he quit the first time?? like. okay. say you have to distract an easily distracted but immensely murderous animatronic and your first thought is "hmm what if i use that rc car that looks like a child from my old workplace". bitch if its been 7 years since i worked there and witnessed a traumatizing event im gonna bury that fucker at the bottom of my closet not just have it with me. also his first concern when he was faced with a very much "i am going to die" situation is that he hasnt caught up on a tv show yet???? nate buddy please i appreciate you but get some self-worth and some therapy while youre at it

aj: he was nearly killed by an animatronic as big as he was, stopped only by like a foot or smth, and then IMMEDIATELY accepted the transfer to ANOTHER place with animatronics in it like. why would you actively choose to keep working with fazbear entertainment. im sure literally any other company ever would look at aj "nearly killed two men because he wanted to work more hours" purple guy and hire him in a millisecond. SPEAKING OF WHICH, HE NEARLY KILLED TWO MEN BECAUSE HE WANTED TO WORK MORE HOURS. DO YOU NEED THE MONEY THAT BADLY OR DO YOU JUST REALLY FUCKING. WANT TO WORK AT FAZBEARS THAT MUCH. i honeslty cant decide which is worse. he also mocked the guy with a chainsaw who burst through the wall not ten minutes before??? who was also like 2 feet away from him???? what were you EXPECTING him to do??????????????????? give you more hours????????????????????????

phone guy: yeah.

mike: looked at the absolute flaming dumpster fire that was the lawsuits, filthy animatronics, extremely low budget, and EXTREMELY sketchy boss that was the new fazbears and said "yeah i can work with this." also i think he got killed by pan stan which is such a sad way to go my god. i dont have quite as much to say about him but i DO love him very much and he REALLY SHOULD HAVE gotten a better job.

lizzy: other than the fact she hasnt quit fazent yet (which is excusable considering it looks like shes looking into the sketchy stuff and is probably mostly there for mikes death), actually not that bad. props to her tbh if i had to deal with a boss like phone guy id go considerably more feral.

those police officers who showed up for like 2 scenes in the og fnaf musical: just fucking, like. let an actual murder perp ESCAPE because they Forgot To Lock The Car And Went To Go Get Food and then just. DIDNT REPORT IT. because this, apparently, is NOT the first time theyve let someone escape, and because theyd LOSE THEIR JOBS IF THEY REPORTED IT. if the police is THAT bad in this town no fucking wonder phone guy's gotten away with everything so far.

41 notes - Posted August 7, 2022

#4

drops dead on the floor

43 notes - Posted October 7, 2022

#3

buddy.... are you..... sweeping..... the evil rune circle............

45 notes - Posted October 20, 2022

#2

SIGHS. okay whatever. 10k notes and i finish reading homestuck

81 notes - Posted October 3, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

i hope the admiral knows i love him

(original image under cut, id in alt)

2,341 notes - Posted September 12, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[eternalera]

some things that annoy me in writing

when a character endlessly trauma dumps on someone especially their lover.

i mostly dont like this trope because one, why and two GET A THERAPIST. THAT SHIT IS THEIR JOB. not to say that their partner cant comfort them but sometimes it does come to a point where that character is ENDLESSLY relying on their significant other for 'validation' or for 'therapy' and then they get mad at themselves or at their partner if they cant provide it. this drops a lot on the other significant other because now theyre worried about their own problems, their partners, and whatever else the hell is going on with their life. and when i say theyre worried about their partners i mean theyre worried worried like its constantly plagues them and the partner AINT HELPING. like they miss a date and all of the sudden it 'where were you?' 'i needed you!' 'you know whats going on with me right now how could you!' like no. stop it. they can love you but they aint your goddamn therapist. get someone else.

2. the whole 'i dont deserve you argument'

yes its fluffy, angsty and practically perfect in nearly every damn way but god. its hardly ever done right. like everything feels forced, the reasons feel forced and i can never actually hear someone saying that. i can hear someone going 'you shouldnt be here' as in 'i dont deserve you' or in some other way. if the whole 'i dont deserve you' argument is underlying then its fine but when its upright in an 'emotional scene' the whole 'i dont deserve you' just makes me go 'ugh' mostly because it just feels so goddamn unrealistic. not to mention it takes all that emotional tension and instead of adding to it, it just fucking plummets it in my opinion. it feels anticlimactic like it was gonna be the climax but it failed. kinda like you save what you think is gonna be the best firework for last but turns out its a dud so now youre sitting their like 'well wtf was that'

3. when characters are actively being pressured by the cast to move on

like shut up, it takes the average person 4 years to grieve and then some. just because it was a really long time ago doesnt mean that it didnt hurt. chances are that it hurt A LOT. not to mention its usually like 'we/you cant do anything about it, move on from it' this is usually over traumatic experiences and im sorry but this just isnt healthy. not saying that you have to be stuck in that moment forever but you cant just go 'welp i couldnt do anything, sucks to suck buh-byeeee' like no, thats not how it works. you need to come to terms with what happened and what you did. not endlessly blame yourself or just say that it wasnt your fault even partially. thats not coming to terms with things thats denying the truth. never do this

4. when sad backstories supposedly make up for everything

suck it up. yeah no suck it up. you can have trauma from those experiences but it doesnt make up for what you did in the SLIGHTEST. its basically saying 'sir i only killed that man because my parents never loved me :((((' like honey there is no correlation. stop

5. unnecessary descriptions to describe a character. like when theyre lovesick, sure. thats FINE. but when youre just meeting them like slow your roll. im trying to process so many things at once already, i got the dialog their personality, what was currently going on in the scene. not to mention sometimes i dont like overly descriptive dialog because it takes away the room for imagination which kinda sucks because if i saw them wearing a skirt but now youre saying theyre wearing jeans it kinda fucks with my mind more

these are all just my opinion :)

[savethepinecones]

ive got asthma. i run across a crosswalk and i end up wheezing for a good ten minutes. i dont have much stamina or speed and my asthma limits my ability to even improve these. i have an inhaler that im supposed to use multiple times per day and another one that i use whenever my breathing gets bad.

ive had the asthma since i was a baby, but because i wasnt very active (i was more of a music kid than a sports kid), for a long time it didnt have much of an impact on my life. for a solid chunk of my childhood i more or less forgot i had it at all. sure i would get winded easily but thats normal when youre out of shape right? i never excercised so it must just be that.

in the past several years, though, its gotten worse. wildfires affected air quality in my area and i started to occasionally have trouble breathing just from being outside for too long. i finally went to a doctor and got an inhaler (i hadnt bothered to get one in years since i used it so rarely and even if i didnt my breathing would sort itself out. eventually). currently ive got one that im supposed to use multiple times a day and another that i carry with me to use if i get winded while im out and about. even with these, i still cant run much without it affecting my breathing. i dont especially enjoy running so im not too upset by the lack of it in my life but its frustrating that i cant do it on the occasion that i want or need to do so.

ive had a similar journey with my mental health. i ignored it as a kid, convinced myself everything was fine and normal, until i eventually had to admit to myself that that wasnt the case. what most people considered a brisk walk or light jog was more like running a marathon for me. i only worked parttime for years until i was able to get on antidepressants because i knew fulltime would be too much for me without them. when i did start taking meds, it was still difficult but technically possible.

i managed to keep my pace up for two years before i hit a limit i couldnt force myself to push through. whether id finished the marathon or not, i couldnt keep running. so i took a break. i sat down on a bench, drank some water, and waited for my breathing to slow as i watched others run past, going at a similar speed to what id been keeping, but barely looking winded. i knew i wouldnt be able to return to my previous pace. even once my breathing evened out, i was still exhausted. and i couldnt just will that exhaustion away. i tried anyway. once my lungs had stopped hurting, i stood up and started running again. my legs still ached and my breathing quickly worsened but i had to keep moving so i ignored as much as i could and endured the rest. i stopped several times to take a break but i didnt allow myself to sit again. this went on for maybe two weeks before my legs gave out and i had to find another bench.

since then ive been catching my breath. letting my burning limbs rest. i decided that once i was well and truly ready to start running again, i would go slow enough that i could keep a steady pace without wearing myself out. i probably wont work fulltime ever again.

ive more or less caught my breath but my legs are killing me so even though i want to keep moving, im going to go slow. im walking slowly, gradually picking up the pace while being careful not to push myself too hard. its difficult. im not used to acknowledging my limits. i spent two decades thinking that as long as i didnt collapse i was fine. i hadnt allowed myself to slow whenever my breathing became labored. my lungs would ache but i would continue on my sprint regardless. sometimes i still push myself too hard. other times i think im not running fast enough. i catch myself thinking that even if i cant run like everyone else is, i should do as much as i can. i should determine what my limit is and stay just a hair below that speed. its not comfortable, but this has never been comfortable, so what does that matter?

no, i tell myself. your comfort matters. go at whatever speed works for you. i repeat this to myself as i continue to walk. sometimes i jog a little. im surprised to find it enjoyable. ive always been too exhausted to enjoy the run. still, everyone else maintains the same speed theyve had from the start. they look at me walking and criticize me for not running seriously. some say ive had enough time to catch my breath, so i should get back to sprinting now. i tell them i dont think i should. they say im not trying hard enough.

sometimes i look at the people running past and feel guilty for not keeping pace. like ive let myself down somehow. i remind myself that this isnt a race, its more of a jogging path. im allowed to walk if i need to. people run past, scoffing at me for giving up. i havent given up, i want to tell them. im still walking. still making progress.

someone grabs my arm, pulling me forward. forcing me to match their speed. i know theyre trying to help me, but im tripping over my feet in my struggle to keep up. theyre struggling too, i can tell, but they wont allow themselves to stop or slow. you need to do better, they tell me. tiredness is no excuse. i dont know how to explain to them that i passed tired long ago. i pull my arm away. i cant keep up with you. and thats okay. no its not, they tell me. you must run like the rest of us. walking isnt even close to good enough. they run ahead. i jog for a few minutes, enjoying the run, then stop at a bench for a water break. i begin walking again. i remind myself that thats enough.