#would you believe if i said i have never read the bible to completion or even one singular book of the bible start to finish lmao

[encrucijada]

does watching a video essay on midnight mass (that i have not watched) count as research for haze dogs

[shhh-secret-time]

rahhhh i’m such a fan of your writing omg and I never request stuff so i’m very nervous to send this but can I Pretty Please ask for something w kyle who’s usually more of a sub being asked to like Go Crazy Dom and at first he’s nervous but then like completely gets into it and wrecks reader’s shit please…. thank u for yr service🙏🏼

Oh lovelies you never need to be nervous when sending requests, I know it can be intimidating but believe me I say this truly makes my day!

That being said, I hope you don't mind that I've combo the request with someone else's! I'm getting a lot of Kyle and I wanna make sure everyone gets a little of what they want! And there is filth ahead so get your bibles ready. Sinners the lot of you.

Me too

Warning: NSFW, Slight choking, Dom!Kyle, Sub!Reader, Breeding Kink, Oral, Strong Language

Pairing: Kyle x Fem!Reader

Notes: Shout out to the roommate who talked me through making a Danish so I didn't have to google it lmao.

The smell of brown sugar and cinnamon filled the air swirling around in your small kitchen. The morning light peeks through the curtains of the circular window in front of the sink, you smile at the view of lilac and orange seemed to blend. You've read things online where people compared the morning sky to painting where the paint seemed to just melt together, and it seemed like one of those days. If you were better with a camera, you'd take a picture just to share it. That and the fact that you had a pair of arms wrapped around your waist and a very sleepy curly red-haired man nuzzling into your shoulder.

Your husband Kyle was never a morning person, for all his perfections and his strict schedule keeping, when the morning sun would greet him, he'd return the greeting with a groan and a feeble attempt to hide. You were trying to revive the poor man by making a pot of coffee, the warm brown liquid was the only thing that brought him back to the land of the living. The man ran off of coffee, you were sure the Tweeks owed half their business to him. With the coffee pot humming its little tune and the smell of ingredients laid out across the counter this morning just seemed perfect. Now if only your husband didn't have to leave and go to work if he could just stay with you and keep you warm.

The crisp morning air seeped into the house and sure you could change out of the basketball shorts you stole from him, and the large T-shirt you stole from him, oh the fluffy socks you stole from him but then you wouldn't smell like him. Because he would be leaving after he got through with his morning routine, and you'd be alone in this cold little house.

"What's with the face baby?" His voice broke you out of your little pout, the sleepy gravel laced in each word sent a shiver down your spine.

"What face? I'm making apple and brown sugar Danishes..." You say with a little smile on your face knowing full well he was going to keep bugging you about this.

"Hm... that’s why you had your lip poked out. And your brows were doing that thing." How did he know? He still had his face buried in you, now pushed into the crook of your neck.

You only hum in response as you focus on the apple in your hands, the knife gliding across the skin of the ruby red fruit. He knew better than to mess with you while you were handling dangerous kitchen tools, so he waited until you finished. Once you finished slicing the apples you gently placed them into the lemon water mixture, it would keep the apples fresh while you worked on the rest of the pastry. Next your hands find the mixing tool and begin to pull together nutmeg, brown sugar, butter, salt, and finally the cinnamon. Because you didn't have a lot of time in the mornings, knowing your husband had little time, you prepared the flour before he even stirred.

"You can't ignore me forever; I'm just going to keep bugging you until you tell me why you made such an adorable face." Kyle reminds you that he's still latched onto you by placing a lazy kiss on your neck, his lips trailing down towards your shoulder touching any skin that's exposed by the baggy shirt.

Every little kiss pulled you further and further away from your mixing, you couldn't help but melt under his affection. That didn't stop you from trying. You try squirming away from his lips, pushing your cheek against his face to nudge it out of the way.

"Baby, I'm trying to make you breakfast. Do you want to go to work hungry?"

"Hmm no, but if it means getting you to talk then I can suffer a little." He responds by tugging you back against him pulling you away from the bowl, the only shield against his wondering lips.

Kyle turns you around and lifts you up so you're facing him, using the counter so that you can look him in the eye. He's lucky you already put the ingredients you needed in the bowl, it didn't matter how pretty he looked with his messy bedhead and his soft green eyes, if he ruined your work, he'd get more than a pout. You expect him to move his hands from under your thighs, but he doesn't, instead he slots himself in between your legs and keeps the warmth of his palm on your exposed skin.

"No where to run now, come on love talk to me."

You look away for a moment, the heat from his hands was almost as warm as the blush on your face. "I- was just thinking about how lonely it is sometimes when you leave for work. I miss you..." You finally cave, how can you not under his gaze especially when it softens as you speak.

Kyle lets out a soft 'oh' that seems to drag out along with a sigh. He places a soft kiss on your cheek, one of his hands leaves your thigh and cups the side of your face his lips aren't on. "I'm sorry, you know getting out of bed is one of the hardest things I do every morning. I want nothing more than to stay wrapped up in the blankets with you."

This is why you didn't want to say anything, it was a selfish feeling. He was the one going out to provide for you both, he was the one who had to leave the house while he insisted that you stayed home to relax. When you first married Kyle, it was one of the first things he expressed he wanted, the need to take care of you and pamper you. It was a dream at first, having all that time to yourself and your hobbies and the only thing you needed to focus on was keeping the house clean.

Kyle pulls your face towards him, his index finger hooking under your chin to guide you back to him. His face drops to a frown when he sees the look on your face, his eyes studying you carefully.

"Hey, why don't we go out tonight? We can get some dinner and maybe catch a movie?" He's trying and it's so sweet, the way he doesn't seem to even mind your selfishness.

"That sounds nice. I'm sorry Kyle." You smile at him giving him a little kiss on the nose.

"Why are you sorry? You didn't do anything wrong."

"It's just-...you're the one that has to work and I'm being, I dunno clingy?"

"Baby you're not clingy. Honestly, I love that you want me here. I want to be here." If he wasn't already smiling at the way you kissed his nose, he definitely has a love filled grin now.

"I know and it makes me feel bad for telling you. Like, it's probably already hard enough for you to go to work."

Kyle goes quiet for a only a moment before shaking his head, the red curls bouncing from side to side as he does. He sighs softly and looks at you with heavy lidded eyes. The love in his smile matches the soft greens of his eyes.

"You're so sweet. Such a wonderful wife, you know that? I can't believe I'm this lucky to have married someone so considerate." Between his barrage of compliments and the way he peppers your face with so many soft kisses you can't argue back. "You're not making my life harder by wanting me to stay, I'm not burdened by you, I promise. Have I ever been the kind of guy to keep that kind of thing quiet?"

No. If Kyle Broflovski felt strongly about something you would hear it. It was honestly one of your favorite things about him, you never had to guess how he felt or if he wasn't upset and was too afraid to tell you. There were moments where he needed time to sort out his feelings or he'd explode, and he swore he'd never do that to you. Not you, not the person he bound his life to.

"There's more to this isn't there? Come on love, what is it?" Kyle Broflovski was also very good at reading you, turns out.

You pressed your lips together as your hands worked up towards his hair, carding your fingers through his fiery red curls. He hummed in delight at the way your fingers felt against his scalp, if you didn't want to risk ruining the moment, you'd compare him to a cat.

One should feel honored that Kyle would even allow them to see his hair when he was a kid, now here you were touching it and even massaging his scalp. You swore if you had enough time, you'd have him purring in your hands.

"I was just thinking about a way to not make the house so lonely."

"You want me to see if I can't start working from home? It'll be a little difficult, but I can-"

"No, no. I mean that would be awesome but no. I mean like...what if we had a little us running around? You know?" You whisper letting your voice drop as if someone could be listening in on your conversation.

Kyle's eyes widen and you watch his face turn a bright red, the freckles on his face pop against his skin. You've never seen him react like that, even before you were married in those early dating stages. Sure, there were times where he got nervous, times where he felt his heart speed up when he looked at you, times where he was puddy in your hands and you could pull a side of him that he'd never show anyone else.

In the bedroom it was you who took the lead. Maybe it was because Kyle was so busy being "dominate" in other parts of your relationship that when it was time for love making, he just wanted to let someone else have control. Being able to shut his mind off and just focus on the wonderful feeling you gave him was what heaven felt like, he was sure. And he was just lucky you liked the role, that you took to it so easily. There was no shame in his eyes, he just wanted to keep what you both did between you two. The world didn't need to know what went on behind closed doors. But the way he looked at you told a different story.

"You...want a baby? My baby?" His voice matches your level, but his voice seems to dip lower than his usual sleepy voice.

"Who else? I know we haven't really talked about it, but I think we're in a good spot and we'd make really good parents."

When Kyle doesn't respond you squirm a little on the counter, shifting in his hold that seemed to tighten around your thigh. You watched as he took a deep breath, and his eyes fluttered shut. Then he grabbed his phone and began tapping away against the screen. You went to move so you could give him the privacy he needed as your eyes caught the little text bubbles being sent. You tried your hardest not to read what he was texting but his hand on your thigh squeezed around the soft flesh, a silent warning to keep still. The way his jaw shifts and the veins in his arms poke out makes you tilt your head in confusion.

"I called off." His voice breaking the silence makes you jolt, that and the way he tosses his phone to the side.

"What?! Why!? I don't want to be the reason you're staying home." You try to protest further but you're cut off by the way his lips slam into yours.

"I've got plenty of sick days I never use. You're sitting here in my clothes talking about wanting my baby. And god damn it I didn't even want to go in today anyway." He growls in between the kisses, emphasizing each word.

"I always wear your clothes though! I don't see-... Kyle did asking for a baby get you worked up?" You ask pulling him back from your lips by his hair, he usually likes when you tug on the roots.

He lets out a small moan, but it's cut off by another growl, he grabs your hands holding your smaller wrists in his one hand. Pinning them above your head against the cabinets behind you makes you gasp, and your eyes widen. This was a new side to him that had your core pulsing with desire.

He didn't need to answer, you got it from that alone, but he did. "You have no idea how long I've been thinking about wanting to fill you up. How bad I wanna cum in you until there's no question that you're pregnant."

You shutter and whimper at the way he speaks to you, his dirty talk working its magic. As the years went on, he worked on trying to keep it out of his vocabulary, but in moments like this where he gets worked up it would slip out.

But it never came out like this, you never realized how much you liked Kyle like this. You never saw the looks he would give you when you were so busy taking care of Ike. The way his eyes would linger with a dark hunger behind them as you took care of his baby brother like it was second nature. Thoughts of your own kids grabbing at your hip and hugging your leg, a baby in your arms and another one in his. How jealous he was that Stan told him one night that he was trying with his partner for kids. How Kenny already had one with another one the way. Kyle wanted his kids to grow up with theirs, maybe they'd be best friends like they were.

More importantly he wanted to see you pregnant, the need to take care of you was ingrained so deeply that he wanted this. Needed this. His cock was aching already over the fact that you brought it up and he didn't have to. You came to him wanting a baby and fuck he was going to give you one. Especially if you kept whimpering and pressing your body against his like that.

"Who's getting worked up now? Do you like that idea? C'mon talk to me Mama." Oh, the way he called you that was dangerous, his hot breath ghosting over your exposed collarbone.

"I-I-" You can't get it out, the way your head is spinning and the way his lips are working, making his mark on your skin. You yelp when his teeth sink in and his grip on your wrists tightens. "I do! I-I want you!"

He seemed to like that, liked the way you beg for him so easily. You feel him smirk into your skin and his free hand push up your shirt. His fingertips glide across your skin finding your breasts, there he gives your nipple a sharp pinch, rolling the nub between his index finger and this thumb. "You sound so pretty like this; I should have done this forever ago.... I'm gonna let your hands go so I can get this shirt off you. You keep them there." Kyle wasn't asking, not the way he clicked his tongue and rolled your nipple.

You cry out and nod, barely able to verbally respond, the pain was intoxicated something you didn't even know you liked. If this was how he was acting from just talking about putting a baby in you, you couldn't wait until he was actually fucking you. For now, you'd play his game, keep your hands above your head so he can slip the faded T-shirt off you.

"I never get tired of this." Next comes your shorts, he unties the strings keeping the baggy basketball shorts up and around your waist. His hands working on pulling them down until they pool beneath his feet, kicking them to the side. "I can't believe you thought for a second I would be upset with you for wanting me to stay home. Fuck, I'm glad you said something. Guess I don't have to worry about going to work hungry hm?" He returns to your neck, but he doesn't stay for long, he kisses a heated trail down to your breasts.

There his lips latch onto your hardening buds. His tongue swirls around the pink flesh hungrily sucking until they're red and sore. Each little cry and moan you let out only encourages him to give the other side the same attention. All the while his hands work on opening your legs to him.

His attention is pulled away when he feels your soaked cunt. Expecting to find your panties, he growls and looks down at you. You don't know how he went from looking you in the eye, to almost hovering over you with such a dangerous look. How he made you feel so small like you were prey.

"Was this a part of your plan? Make those adorable pouting faces and get me to fuck you on the kitchen counter? Wear nothing under my clothes so I can dive right into that delicious looking pussy?" You moan and throw your head back, not just from how filthy he spoke but from how he bit the inside of your thigh.

Teeth marks marking up and down your plump perfect thighs, they were perfect to him. Perfect in the way they felt under his teeth, perfect in the way they filled his hand, perfect in the way you tasted. All of you was perfect.

"Oh fuck~" You're nearly cut off by another gasp as his nips turn to kisses against your slit.

"Keep moaning like that, it goes so well with my breakfast." The way his tongue slipped through the lips of your cunt against your bud made your gasp turn to moans.

Kyle devoured you like you were his last meal, his tongue swirls around your nub like he had your breasts. You couldn't help as your hips rolled against his tongue chasing pleasure with greed, but he stops you with a firm hold on your thighs. His teeth graze your bud as a warning, a silent demand for you to sit still, but if the way he spoke and pinned you down was anything to go off of; you needed to keep pushing. So, you pushed against his hold again, squirming against his mouth.

When Kyle pulls back and clicks his tongue, it isn't until you see the look in his eyes that you know you're in trouble. "I kept my hands up like you told me to...w-what is it?"

"You know what. I'm trying to eat my meal in peace and you're making it very hard. Quit being a brat."

"But I was just-"

Kyle cuts you off again, but not with his lips or his own words, but from his hands wrapped around your throat. The tips of his fingers applied a healthy amount of pressure to cut off just enough air to make your head spin. His eyes narrow down at you as he forces your head up.

"You were just...what? Arguing with me? No, I think you were going to say, I'm sorry I won't move my hips again. I'll keep still so you can eat."

He waits. Waits for you to nod before letting your throat go, then he waits another second looking at you expectedly. As you gasp for air your tongue traces your bottom lip. "I... I’m sorry and I'll keep still so you can eat."

"Good girl."

Oh. Oh. Maybe you were more of a switch than you thought. Maybe it was just the way he said that with that delicious purr. At this moment you didn't really care to put a label on it, you were just burning from the praise. Not like you had a lot of time to think about it anyway, not when he knelt back down and started eating you out. His lips latched onto the sensitive nub pulling a moan from you as he sucked, his tongue flicks over it again and again. He's attentive to every sound you make from the way your muscles flex and bounce under his touch. All but humming when your yell for God or his name.

Throwing your head back, you swore you were seeing stars when he shook his head back and forth. The friction had you clenching around nothing and your nails digging into the wooden cabinets behind you.

"Kyle baby, I'm gonna cum. Please let me cum. I-I've been good I did what you told me!"

When he doesn't say anything, you have to fight the urge to grab him by the head and force him to look up at you. Slowly he looks up at you and the little flicker of fire behind them tells you all you need. It takes everything in your power not to close your eyes as you cum around his tongue, even more so when his tongue begins to greedily lap it up. You mewl and squirm trying to pull away from him, but he won't let you, won't let you move from his hold. Nothing you could have baked for him would taste as perfect as you do.

"So sweet~. Hmm always taking care of me." Kyle rubs his lips against your thighs again, wiping the slick off his jaw.

As he stands back up, he can't help but admire his work. The way your skin is marked with his teeth marks, the purple bruises on your thighs shaped like his hand, and now the way your face is flushed a dark red as you try to catch your breath. You can't quite read what's going on in his head, but he's got that look like he's thinking about something. The way his brows knit together and his eyes flicker from you to around the room.

Then he hums, picks you up and carries you over to the kitchen table. You shiver when the cool wood hits your back but it's a distant complaint as he hovers over you. Somewhere between the counter and the table he's slipped off his plaid bottoms and his boxers. Discarded somewhere with your clothes, you click back into reality as he pulls his shirt over his head. Most of his freckles are covering his shoulders, dusting across the pale skin and down his back. He raises a brow at you when he catches you admiring just how handsome he really is. It's only morning and he's already got you so dazed and worked up.

"Got something to say Mama?"

Fuck you were really beginning to like that, "just thinking about how incredibly lucky I am. We're gonna make some really pretty babies."

He smirks at you, the kind that would have made you fall to your knees if you weren't laying on the table. "Yeah? I was just thinking the same thing. How fucking beautiful you are. How pretty you're gonna look when I finally paint your insides."

You cover your mouth to stop the moan from slipping out of your mouth, but once again he stops you and pins your hands by your side. "No. Let me hear you. I need to hear you begging for my cock. Beg me to fill you up."

It takes a few teasing glides of his cock over you folds and a few more growls before you finally cave. The way the words roll of your tongue is like sin. "Please Kyle, I want you to fuck a baby into me. I want it so bad; it has to be you. Only you!"

"Fuck!" His own resolve crumbles just as the tip of his cock slips back down to your begging hole.

This isn't the first time you've felt him without a condom but this time it felt so different. Knowing he wasn't going to pull out this time was exciting, the fact that he could just let go and take you however he wanted. To claim you with his cum. You're so caught up in your own thoughts you don't even feel the way he puts your legs up on his shoulders, or his curls brushing against your face. It isn't until he finally sheathes himself into you that you snap out of it. You moan next to his ear when he bottoms out in you, the way your thighs burn feels so good.

"Your cunt's choking me, trying to milk me already baby? Don't worry I'll give you every last drop." Kyle lulls his head to the side as he begins lazily rocking into you.

You're almost folded in half from the way he has you under him, knees pushed back towards your shoulders. Kyle's got your hands still pinned by the side of your head; fingers intertwined with yours. Normally his eyes would flutter shut, he'd give into the sensation of his cock nudging into your walls, but this time he keeps them open. Like he is trying to memorize every time your lips form that cute little 'o' and a moan comes spilling out. The way your moans pitch up when he hits that delicious spot. The way you pant and beg for him to go faster.

That's when he shifts, the loving hold and lazy thrusts turn to fast paced fucking. Love making is always there, you never doubt that, but the way he's got his hands around your waist pulling you back onto his cock feels so raw. He slams into you with a newfound force neither of you knew he could muster. Your eyes roll to the back of your head, stars dancing across your vision. He rewards you with his own moans and grunts, the further his cock head pushes past your walls the faster he brings you to climax. Now that your hands are free from his strong grip, you place them on his forearm’s nails digging into his flesh. He hisses but it only seems to push him further.

"Come on baby. Cum around my cock. Yeah, just like that. Just like that!"

You arch your back and give him all you have. Your walls finally grip his cock as you reach your peak. Between your heart beating in your ears and the way he slams back into you, it's almost too much. Kyle finds a way to keep you on the line without pushing you too far. You feel the way his hips begin to stutter, and his moans become ragged. You know he's close.

"Yeah. Fuck you feel so good, I'm gonna- gotta fill you up. Take it!" He groans and then you feel his hot seed against your walls. Pushing up into your cunt, he plugs your hole with a final slam of his hips.

You and your husband lay there against one another, panting heavily until your breathing slows down to match one another. You can feel his lips pressed against your neck and his eyelashes tickle your skin. When you move your hands to his hair again, he knows you're okay, he presses a few short kisses onto your soft lips. Kyle feels you smile against his lips, and he doesn't even bother stopping the lazy one that comes across his.

"Never seen that side of you. I like it." You purr finally able to talk now that you've slowed down.

"Hm, keep that in mind when we do this again."

"Again?"

"Oh baby, we've got all day. It's Friday. I'm going to treat you to dinner like I promised. After that I'll take you upstairs and we're going to do this again. And again. Aaaaaand again. I'll keep my cock plugged in you like this and we'll go to sleep." His fingers push back into your hair, pushing it out of your sweaty face.

"J-Jesus Kyle." You shutter under his touch, unable to stop the way your walls flutter around him again. You can feel his cock bob in response, and when he slides his hardened member out slowly; you feel every little vein like he wants you to memorize it.

"Gotta make sure you're pregnant. My perfect, beautiful, wonderful wife deserves to be a mama. And what kind of husband would I be if I didn't give her exactly what she wants?" Kyle smirks down at you with newfound energy.

It was going to be a long morning, maybe you could convince him to let you finish making those pastries but you had a feeling that would be a battle. Especially since he's already started thrusting back into you. Maybe a few more rounds wouldn't hurt, you could always have him put the baked goods in the oven. After all he was doing so well already.

[dee-morris]

I Think We Moved on Too Quickly from Coffee Theory

Yeah yeah I know. But hear me out.

When I watched the season two finale the first time, I felt blindsided by it. From a narrative perspective it made sense, bc Neil Gaiman said that he needed to set up the situation that would make season three possible and okay yeah, that probably meant putting Crowley and Aziraphale in weird and different places. I got that. But from a character perspective it felt like a huge reversal from Aziraphale's behavior throughout season two, and of course that led me to look for outside factors that could have caused it.

After talking about it with Internet friends, reading lots of metas, thinking and discussing and watching the season over again, I decided that it wasn't necessary to believe that Aziraphale had been drugged. Most of what he said and did could be explained by careful study and analysis. Once you realize that Metabitch's presence in the bookshop is a veiled threat, everything else falls into place.

Nevertheless.

I definitely DO NOT Believe that Aziraphale was brainwashed or mind controlled by the coffee. His behavior during the Final Fifteen was frenetic, desperate, little bit manic. Definitely not the behavior of a mindless zombie. But nevertheless.

I still think that there was too much emphasis on the coffee for it to be a simple prop. Is it a literal macguffin or a symbolic one, that I'm not sure. I could see it either way. It might be just a symbol of the Sophie's Choice that Aziraphale had been presented with, or... There might have actually been something in the coffee.

The show makes a point of telling us that celestials can be affected by human poison. Almonds are symbolic in the Bible, and cyanide smells like almonds. Again, Aziraphale's behavior at the breakup scene was not that of a brainwashed person, but what if the Metatron TRIED something like that and it didn't completely work?

Aziraphale didn't want to follow the Metatron until after he drank the coffee. And even then he turned and looked at Crowley, and he didn't move until Crowley told him to go ahead. (Cue the Breaking Bad Walter Screaming in the Car meme) What if whatever the Metatron tried on Aziraphale only kind of worked? Just enough to make Aziraphale a bit dizzy and suggestible, but being close to Crowley mitigated the worst of it. That's why Metatrash needed to separate them.

Aziraphale is very clever, and if he knew he'd been drugged he would also know better than to let on that it hadn't worked completely. Cue the weird off-key phrases that are ALMOST in character but still pretty damn weird. "Heaven is the side of goodness, of light" my dude has NEVER said anything like that. He's said that about God, yes, but he's always held a distinction between God and heaven. Or "you're the bad guys" that's just WEIRD, that's a weird thing for him to say, and I will die on this hill. Even during their worst fights Aziraphale has made distinctions been himself and Crowley in terms of their job descriptions, but he's never made a moral judgement like that before, nor has he ever lumped Crowley in with the rest of hell. "They're the bad guys," now that would have made sense, and if it were anyone but Neil Gaiman running this shit I would think that it was a simple scripting error. But Neil doesn't make mistakes like that.

So Aziraphale plays along and tried desperately to communicate with Crowley that something IS VERY WRONG but our favorite disaster demon picks NOW to get in his feelings and ignore the clear and present danger standing outside the bookshop and staring at them. I'm pretty sure "I forgive you" is Aziraphalese for ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME??

Again, I don't need my version of Coffee Theory to be real to understand what happened in the Final Fifteen, but it's just an interesting little toy to roll around in my head. There's so much emphasis on that coffee in the show and even in the episode synopsis, I still think there's something about it that we haven't been told.

[paradoxcase]

John 5:4

THE TOWER HAS BEEN REACTIVATED

So I guess that is for "Earth" and then "Alecto" and then "Harrow". It's interesting that this little secondary story does not actually tell us anything about where the name "Alecto" came from. Was it a name that John gave to her? Or one that she gave herself? Given John's obsession with the name Gaia, I would have thought he'd pick that

You've proven over and over again that no one should trust you with anything, dude

Harrow mentions "waking up" as being a separate thing from resurrection again later, but it's not clear what this means at either point

Are you telling me that John made them forget everything just by doing something physical to their brains and Mercy the anatomy expert who definitely figured out what Harrow did to her brain after only a few months never figured this out in 10,000 years? I cannot believe that

This makes it sound like the other planets were already populated before John destroyed everything. So how did those people die? Did just killing the planets cause that to happen? Did John kill all the people on the planets in addition to the planets? I figured that at least the technology to make the other planets habitable had come from after the start of the 10,000 years, but apparently not even that was invented during John's regime, the whole society has just been completely static the whole time. This is straining suspension of disbelief here

There's no way they decided they wanted to do whatever John did with Alecto, because until the end of Harrow the Ninth, all of the Lyctors thought Alecto was just someone that John resurrected who came back wrong, they didn't realize she was Earth, and they definitely didn't realize she was John's cavalier, that was the whole point of the reveal at the end of the last book

So confirmed that John only created the Lyctors so that they would be roped into fighting the resurrection beasts for him. And then he talks about ripping his fingers from his hands and throwing them to the resurrection beasts, but what he really means is sacrificing his friends so that he can continue on

Oh my god, I don't think I've ever been this mad about someone misinterpreting a bible story before. The whole point of the flood story was that God said, oh, no, this was a terrible mistake, I'm so sorry, I promise I will never destroy the world again no matter how bad it gets. The point was not that the world was evil and needed a "fresh start", the point of the story was that destroying the world just because there are some evil people there is wrong. And like, this isn't a one-time lesson in the OT, either, it comes back again in the Sodom and Gomorrah story when God wants to destroy the cities because there are some bad people there and Abraham has a big argument with him and argues him down to agreeing to spare the cities if there is even one good person there other than Lot and his family. This was like, character development for God, he went from someone who destroyed the whole world because of some bad people and he is learning and relenting and getting some perspective from Abraham. And then later you have the story of Jonah, where now it's Jonah who wants the city destroyed, and God is lecturing him about why that's not right. Like, to the extent that the OT, which was written by like four or five different people with very different ideas of who God was and then frankensteined together by an editor hundreds of years later actually has a coherent narrative and consistent themes, this is pretty consistent. How does someone who grows up with these stories fail at understanding them so badly? How is it possible for someone who probably has advanced degrees to have such shit reading comprehension? This is the most infuriating thing John has ever said in these entire last two books

So this is what she meant by "where did you put the people" at the end of the last John chapter. I would guess the answer is either that he actually consumed all of their souls for power somehow, or that their souls are somewhere generating power in some way. I guess this probably won't be answered until the fourth book

The "tower" that's been menitoned... but it doesn't seem like this is meant to be Canaan House, as people have indicated on previous posts, and at least in this case it seems to be something that's in the River, or maybe she is just travelling through the River to get there?

Also, since this is the last John chapter, I have to ask, for poll-making purposes: Is it ever clarified in this book or elsewhere which country was the one that hired John to puppet around their dead head of state?

[dinodinodin0]

He brought you to me, pretty girl

! ♡ ୧꒰*´꒳*꒱૭ ✧ ！

Pairings: Eddie Munson x fem!reader

Warnings: innocent!reader, christian!reader, god kink, worshipping kink, perv!Eddie if you squint, spicy ish, church

This is part one 🤍 part two

You're the sweetest girl in church. You're prim and proper, modest church dress and your hair ties in a high ponytail. Everyone in your church loved you, as you adored helping around even without being asked. You almost worked at the churchat this point.

Leaving church, A sweet old lady who was a church regular stopped you at the doors.

"dear, I appreciate your help here so very much. You have a good head on your shoulders and your parents should be proud. Have a blessed rest of your Sunday, dear" she smiled, gesturing you our of the door as you nodded and smiled back at her.

On the car ride home, your dad piped up.

"y'know honey, were very proud of how seriously you're taking your faith. Have you been staying up to date on your bible study?"

You nod. You've never missed a day of studying, and you could practically resite every bible quote by heart.

"well me and your mom are going to go eat at Enzo's to celebrate my promotion, so you'll have the house to yourself for the night." He says, parking the car for you in your houses driveway.

"are you going to be alright pumpkin?" He asks, closing the car door he'd opened for you.

"I'll be just fine daddy, I have a long night of study ahead of me," you smiled, watching his car drive off and heading into your house.

After a few hours of reading, you head up to your room and change into your pajamas.

You noticed a slight breeze coming from your slightly ajar window, but you didn't mind. You left it open for a reason.

What you hadn't noticed, was your boyfriend Eddie watching you through your thin, lace curtains. He watched you change out of your pretty and prim church dress, and into a delicate white nightgown. It was beautiful. It had a bow in the front of it's sweetheart neckline, a babydoll sillouette that reached just below your ass. You looked like an angel to him, quite fitting of your good-girl churchgoer persona.

You weren't faking, you did truly believe and loved devoting yourself to your faith. The only problem with that was.. you weren't completely honest.

You had just graduated from an all girls Catholic school, so now that you were back home you desided to explore the new Hawkins. While on a walk through some neighborhoods, you noticed some rather... energetic music.. coming from a garage. Your father always told you that this type of music was devils music, but you were so intrigued with it that you couldn't just ignore it.

You stood from afar, peering around a car watching them practice. Then, you noticed the guitar player. His hands, covered in rings, expertly strumming his guitar. His long brown curls bouncing with his movements. He looked.. scary. But.. not in the way that made you want to run away. Some way that made you feel.. weird.

Eventually you approached him, despite your intense anxiety.

"excuse me," you swallowed, "I hope I don't sound impolite, but I had heard your playing a while back and felt very... Intrigued by you."

He chuckled. You were adorable to him. You were obsurdly polite, and quite... Pitiful. Like a baby bunny, scurrying and weak. It was blaringly apparent you were greatly different from him.

"wouldn't expect you to listen to that type of music, little lady." He said, looking down at you with a smug look on his face.

You froze with fear. You were so close to him and he was so.. dominating. It was as if the air changed when he was so near to you, as if even atoms would adhere to his demands if asked.

He lifted your chin with his fingers, "you're blushing an awful lot arnt you? Almost like you want me to ask you on a date. Why else would you be so blushy? Not scared of me... " He got closer, locking his eyes on yours, "are ya?"

You stammered, "no..i-id like that."

After you've been in a few dates, it had become obvious that it was too little for you. You needed something else. The weird feeling you had when you first saw him grew, and it made you press your thighs together every date you had. You fiddled with your fingers, and constantly bit the inside of your cheek, trying to pray this weird feeling away.

He noticed too. But he noticed that you did absolutely everythingthing he aske beforehand. First it was normal things, if he'd asked you to go get him something like a ketchup packet or napkins for him, you'd snap up to go do what he'd asked, immediately. And then, he experimented with being less polite. He went from, 'hey doll, mind getting me a straw?' To 'Get me straw, little girl. Go on.'

Then it wasn't favors. 'fix your hair, you have strsnds in your face,' or increasingly something along the lines of, 'pull your skirt a bit higher for me sweetheart' you didn't always know why he asked certain things, but you did them without question. Happy to comply.

It became apparent just how much you wanted to submit to him, like you were his little desciple, at his every beck and call.

At the end of your last date, he came close to your ear and whispered.

"do you want to worship me, little girl?"

And since then, he had told you to wait in your room the next night after church. He didn't give you a time, but told you not to question him and keep a blind faith.

So now you were in your pretty nightgown, glowing from the moonlight peering through your curtains.

You heard your window slide open, initially startling you, but Eddie stepped into your room and shushed you.

"shh don't worry sweetheart it's just me. I told ya I'd be here."

He put his hand over your mouth and pressed you to his chest, "your parents home?" You shake your head, "good."

He takes his hand off your mouth and turns you around, kissing you.

He breaks your kiss, looking down at you.

"so you said you wanted to worship me, right?"

"yes.. I do.. I'm not sure why but... I'm convinced God sent you to me," you started, as you felt his eyes stare down at you.

"Everytime since the day I saw you.. I've had this weird feeling with me. It's physical. I tried to pray it away, but it never does.. so I think it's him telling me I'm meant to have it around you." You confess, heart beating faster.

"what.. what kind of feeling is it? He asked, bringing his chin to his chest.

"it's... Odd. My hands get all sweaty, my heart beats faster and... The thing that's new is.. a feeling that's down.. there." You say, face flushing bright red.

He tilts his head, confused. Then, it clicks .

"oh my poor girl.. are you feeling that right now?" He asks, crouching down and holding your hands.

Mhm, you nod, neediness washing over you.

"y'know. I think God wants me to take care of that. I think he wants you to do everything I say, so I can help you."

"you do? What do you want me to do then?" You ask, bitting your lip without quite knowing why.

He holds your hand, bringing himself to sit on your bed. He opens his legs and brings you between them.

"to get rid of that feeling, you need to worship me. God brought me you for a reason right? God chose you for me" he says, adding for you to get on your knees and pray.

You start to lower your head and clasp your hands, but he stops you.

"ah ah ah, not like that. You'll pray to me another way, got it?" You holt, embarrassed, and await his next orders.

"what way do you mean then?" You ask, staring up at him.

"it's a new kind of worship you do to people like me. People that give you that feeling." He pets your hair, suddenly grabbing a handful and pulling your head back.

"open your mouth for me"

.-+-.-+-.-+-.-+-.

A/N: AAAAA THIS IS SO LONG IM SORRRYYY, sorry I never get to the actual smut, please let me know if you'd want me to continue it !!! Just felt like it was already too long

Tag list: @rebelcthulhu

[morlock-holmes]

I think I've finally thought of a way to put into words something I've been thinking about in conspiracy thinking.

Because there are, certainly, real conspiracies out there, but I'm more and more convinced that there is a kind of difference in mindset that characterizes what we call conspiracy thinking.

And that mindset is,

"Everyone believes the same things I do"

A completely batshit article by Rod Dreher crystalized this for me:

There's a Satanic convention -- SatanCon -- coming to Boston next month. Lucien Greaves, the founder of sponsor The Satanic Temple, is a master troller of liberalism. He tells the Boston Globe:

In 2016, TST requested to deliver an invocation before a Boston City Council meeting — a request that City Council denied. As a result, the dedication to Wu is an attempt to highlight what TST co-founder Lucien Greaves called “clear corruption on the part of the Boston City Council” for violating the religious freedoms of the Satanists. TST is also currently suing the City of Boston for denying their invocation request.

“The Supreme Court ruled in favor of such invocations of prayers being given so long as they are open and available to everybody,” Lucien said to the Globe. “They need to still respect pluralism and still respect people’s religious liberty and recognize that no government agency has the right to limit the civic capacities of any one viewpoint over another.”

He's right, isn't he? Isn't this what "religious liberty" means in a neutral public square? The Constitution doesn't say "but not Satanists," does it? That's because it never would have occurred to the Founding Fathers that this would be an issue. It probably wouldn't have occurred to anybody prior to the last few decades that it would be an issue. Now, the usual liberal suspects will tut-tut that Greaves is only trolling, and that this doesn't really mean that the most evil spirit of all is being honored and worshiped. I think this is nothing but liberal cope, the sort of thing right-thinking secularists tell themselves to calm themselves down when dark and freaky stuff is irrupting.

Emphasis mine.

Look, Satanism is not that new or that novel, you can read the Satanic Bible. You can read about their tenets on their website.

Rod knows everything that Satanists claim to believe is just a liberal cope; If they do things Dreher doesn't like it is not because they have a different set of beliefs which creates a different internal logic and thus a different set of behaviors than Dreher would prefer; the very idea is inconceivable and only a naïve fool could believe such a thing.

Instead, they actually believe the exact same things that he does. Therefore, if they do things Dreher doesn't like, it is out of a conscious desire to do bad things and to place Dreher and people like him in danger.

This is one of the main things that distinguishes this kind of thought from just believing in something crazy or weird.

[lesbianlotties]

find the word!

tagged by @eskawrites thank you so much! this is so much fun and i looved reading yours!

rules: search your WIPs for the words you're given and share the extract they're from.

the words i was given are: glass, remain, unlikely, loyal, and wrong.

glass, from my Yellowjackets x The Conjuring AU:

Laura Lee carried with her a messenger bag with a few items she packed with not too much confidence: A Bible, a new one her parents got her when she returned home. A glass bottle filled with holy water that she also got from her parents and now had her wondering if she should have brought more and how to get more of it by herself. A crucifix, yet another object inherited from her family, pulled down from a wall of her new apartment. And, although she preferred not to picture any circumstances in which they would be necessary, she brought her a small hunting knife she bought herself not too long after the rescue, and a rope.

remain, from my Laura Lee Corruption Arc fic

Laura Lee and Van had been close friends for many years and fought to remain close despite growing up in what seemed to be opposite directions, changing into people quite different from each other. They were a source of joy and comfort for each other. A smile that transported them to childhood and a laugh that promised the future would be alright. It didn’t matter how different they seemed to be at the present day. They didn’t expect that their faith in Lottie Matthews would become their new common ground.

unlikely, again from the Laura Lee Corruption Arc fic

Realistically, Laura Lee had remembered hearing that people who commit suicide don’t go to Heaven, but she doubted that was true. Truthfully, she had considered that in such a crowded setting it was unlikely that they would just let her die. Pools do have a tendency to have an entire line of work dedicated to keeping people alive in them. So, some might have argued that she hadn’t genuinely wanted to kill herself that day. At the end of the day, she wasn’t sure it mattered. She got close enough. Close enough to Him to become the daughter her mother expected and demanded her to be. Close enough to dying to realize… No, it wasn’t as scary as some people made it out to be. Well, she tempted death more than once, really. Or, at least, she was planning to.

loyal, again from the Conjuring AU (loyalty seems close enough lol)

Mari cleared her throat, and Lottie’s eyes drifted toward her briefly before returning to Laura Lee, who couldn’t look away from Lottie. It had been a minute since they were reunited and Laura Lee’s mind was already getting carried away with memories of Mari’s fervent loyalty to Lottie, and the times when it had been a threat, competition, or just annoying to Laura Lee. “I’m obviously going to want to know more about how this little reunion came about,” Mari said. “But, you know what, I trust you… both. And this is kind of an emergency so, can we please get going? We don’t have much time.”

wrong, from my Natlee unrequited love fic

Every night, Laura Lee kneeled before her bed and tried to pray. She tried to think of something that wasn’t Natalie. She knew she couldn’t exactly ask God to help her on that subject. It was one thing the hard work of making peace with the disparities between her church and what she genuinely believed God meant, and convincing herself that she wouldn’t necessarily go to hell for the feelings in her heart. It was something completely different to pray to God and ask him for a girlfriend. She couldn’t find it in herself to ask Him to take her feelings away though. She had tried, years ago, to desperately beg God to take away and destroy the attraction she felt that went in a direction her family and her church had told her was wrong. That was over. She’d never go back to that torture. Even if she could ask specifically for God to take away only her feelings for Natalie in particular, she wouldn’t either. It was excruciating, to feel herself falling for Natalie with every word, every look, and every touch they shared. And she wouldn’t change it for the world.

I'm tagging: @natscatorrcio @sapphicscience @yee-hawlw @lilolilyr @scorchedhearth

Your words are: pink, high, ground, alone, and gentle.

[astridlikesmythology]

'https://64.media.tumblr.com/576c7b6f2899350f0b12cf28f723eb8d/66a2bf1b5b7f6451-2d/s640x960/862edbd24a7ac298acaf739128e729ae31a6728d.pnj

I watched some Snoopy clips on Twitter, it's a cheaply veiled PSA for gov't propaganda: Hey kids you want to be a Scientist, they're cool… Snoopy pretends to fly. Point is even if you never watched Snoopy indoctrinate you:

We're all ingrained with the idea this life is the only one we must live for. But if we pay attention we rarely make it to our 100th attempt at any one thing because our soul gets bored with creation [created things], we need our CREATOR to fill us that is fulfillment.

Tim Keller said the problem with modern people is we feel we deserve a good life, meaning we don't deserve bad things. As a result, rather than accept what is, & try to learn what each event is teaching us about ourselves. We instead try to find a way to force reality to fit our desires or perspective.

[Tim Keller: Power for Facing Trouble]

In 1973 Karl Menninger wrote book noting how society replaced morals with medical model: For most of our problems, we use a medical model.

For example: People who are terribly bitter, they will not forgive. But what do they say: They’re hurting, never admit they’re bitter. Hurting—that’s a medical term for a moral problem. You do NOT have a medical problem; you’ve got a moral problem!

Research findings show 90% of Americans believe they show the kind of love in life, that if everybody showed, would make Society all right. Yet Psychologists say no one is ever healed because we are constantly being damaged by others.

Even Brain Surgeons have noted the brain surprisingly does not feel pain & Dr. Wilder Penfield said no matter what he did, he could never cut-out enough of a person's brain to remove their personality. [Michael Egnor: Evidence Against Materialism]

Saying this shows there is something untouchable beyond the physical realm, the thing David Attenborough says is why he remains agnostic because he's seen blind termites incapable of detecting his presence & so he wonders if we have the same lack of sense perception to detect GOD. The Bible says we know GOD exists, & every time we fail in life is one step closer to meeting our MAKER voluntarily or literally.

[YouTube: Off the Kirb Ministries | Sir David Attenborough - Did You Catch It Too?]

Have you ever invited JESUS into your mess?

it is too early in the morning for me to fully process this but the general vibe I'm getting is you think I said christens in general on my DNI list. I specified aggressive due to religious trauma. I'm also not an atheist, I fall somewhere under the pagen area. if you or I misunderstood something that's completely fine, but if I am correct please do not bully people for having different opinions. if I read something wrong feel free to explain.

[alpaca-clouds]

Something that irks me about religion

Let me talk about something, that irks me about religion. Mostly about Christianity, but I am rather sure that it is true for many others as well, though maybe not quite to the same degree as it is with Christians.

Now, if you follow me a bit longer, you know that I am all about accepting people of different religions and faiths and that I am annoyed by the general atheist movement acting all enlightened because they do not believe in any god.

But... at the same time there is also the tendency of religious people to just fucking cherry pick their religious texts, ignoring both the textual context and the historical context.

Again, speaking about the bible because I think it for one is one of the most extreme examples of this - and also because I know most about it. Oh, and also because it has been most used in terms of colonization and supressing other people.

A lot of the people preaching hate with the use of the bible will just ignore the core message of the thing. They will be all about Jesus, but just ignore Jesus's teachings. Because Jesus, the man, did not talk about the gays at all. But he was very big on the entire "love thy neighbour" thing - and on the "rich people are bad, actually" thing as well. He did defend prostitutes, adulterers, and yes, also people who were probably read as gay at the time. But he raised his hand against the rich people, who would not share. Yet, that context is completely ignored, when it comes to those people. Rather they will stick to the two mentions (one in the letters of Paul and one in the old testament) of gay being bad and ignore most of the things Jesus has said.

I grew up in a very, very sternly catholic environment. And I have read the bible. Several times. And even as a teenager I joked, that a lot of Christians should call themselves Paulians, because they sure give a lot more meaning to what Paul is writing in his letters, than what Jesus is actually saying in the gospels.

But especially with the bible, there is another thing that people keep ignoring:

The translation

The choice of books to be included

See, the bible was originally written in Hebrew (though of some parts we only have Greek manuscripts surviving). From which it was translated into Latin with the Latin version being the one that was around for the longest time. Modern translations in some cases build on the Hebrew original - in some cases on the Latin version, though.

So, even if you do unquestioningly believe that the bible is the Word of God... The translation ain't. And we do know that there are things that were mistranslated. Some probably accidentally, while others have probably been mistranslated to further a political agender.

One of those accidental mistranslations is the eagle that was mentioned several times, while it was originally a vulture.

One of the very non-accidental mistranslations is Eva being created out of Adam's rip. But in the Hebrew version it actually just says she was made of "a part" of Adam, with the word implying that she was mde of his half. Making her much more equal than the "rip" translation.

And stuff like that is very common. Especially with the old testament.

Meanwhile with the new testament... Well, if you have ever read Dan Brown or listened to any conspiracy theories at all, you will know that there are actually way more than four gospels. And while I do not necessarily think that this is a big conspiracy or anything... All the stuff that is in the new conspiracy - and all the stuff that was left out - was chosen as such by bishops in the 4th century. They were the ones who canonized what we know as the bible today. And yes, part of that happened for political reasons.

Let's come back to my entire thing about the Paulists. Paul played a large role in establishing Christianity in Rome and all of that, yes. But technically... He never met Jesus and he also was not a prophet or anything. For the most part he is a historical figure, not a religious one. Yet, not only are all his letters part of the New Testament, a lot of religious violence and persecution is justified through them, even though his words are not Words of God. Even Paul never claims that they are. They are just the words of some dude who converted to Christianity early after having a supposed encounter with Jesus' ghost.

And, you know, having all of that in there... it is most certainly a choice. And just refering to that, rather than what Jesus actually says, is too.

And there are many things like this. Things that get left out or ignored or are never questioned.

I mean, just look at the thing about pork. Christians still have the old testament saying that animals with parted hooves are impure. But in ONE of the four gospels Jesus says "Yeah, no, actually, go ahead, eat 'em pigs!" But, again, those gospels were just four of many. And it is not said in the other gospels. So... Did Jesus really say it or was it just put in there, because it made it easier in marketing the religion to Europeans, who sure loved their pork?

I know a lot of people are told how they are supposed to read their holy texts. And, heck, a lot of religions (not only Christianity) has a whole lot of issues going on about who gets to interpret those religious texts. But... I really wished a lot of people would interact with them more critically.

I do not have a problem with any religion per se. I think there are a lot of valuable lessons you can get from any holy text. And if the text to you is the Word of God, I am totally fine with that.

But I really do wish people would just see, that even if it is the Word of God, it got still delivered to us through human hands. Be it through those translators - or through those who taught it to us. And I feel we really need to do better with questioning their agenda.

Just a thought.

[walkswithmyfather]

“There is no fear in love [dread does not exist], but full-grown (complete, perfect) love turns fear out of doors and expels every trace of terror...” —1 John 4:18 (AMPC)

“Fear Not!” By Joyce Meyer:

“Wouldn’t everything in life be better if we didn’t have to deal with fear? Of course, there are healthy fears that alert us to danger—and these are good because they protect us. There is also the fear of God, which means to have a holy, reverential awe and respect for Him. But there is a debilitating fear that Satan tries to put on us every day that is intended to keep us from having the power, love, and sound mind that God wants us to have.

If you have ever struggled as I once did with anxiety, you are familiar with the worry, stress, and feeling of heaviness that comes with it. Many people struggle with fear that has no obvious cause or source. They wonder why they are always afraid and can’t change, no matter how hard they try. Others spend every minute worrying about what might happen. “What if…” is their favorite phrase. “What if I can’t pay the bills?” “What if my child gets hurt?” “What if my husband loses his job?” The endless list of possible tragedies keeps these unfortunate people bound up and miserable every day of their lives.

There are many serious things going on in the world, and we need to be aware of them and prepare for them. But we also need to learn to resist fear when it rises up against us. The Word tells us, God did not give us a spirit of timidity (of cowardice, of craven and cringing and fawning fear), but [He has given us a spirit] of power and of love and of calm and well-balanced mind and discipline and self-control (2 Timothy 1:7 AMPC).

Sometimes we think of fear as an emotion, but we need to realize that fear is actually a spirit. In fact, I believe fear is one of Satan’s favorite tools, and he particularly loves to torment Christians with it. At every possible opportunity, he will whisper in your ear, telling you that God has forgotten you and there is no hope. It makes sense that Satan would try to intimidate us with fear.

But Jesus said, All things can be (are possible) to him who believes! (Mark 9:23 AMPC). We have to believe that there is nothing worse for the enemy than an on-fire, Bible-believing Christian who is fearless! God didn’t promise us that life would be easy. We all will face problems and challenges. But the outcome depends on whether we trust God—or give in to fear.

Psalm 23:4 (AMPC) says, Yes, though I walk through the [deep, sunless] valley of the shadow of death, I will fear or dread no evil, for You are with me; Your rod [to protect] and Your staff [to guide], they comfort me. The psalmist David said he walked through the valley.

When we fear or become afraid, we can be sure that’s not God at work, but one of the sly tricks of our spiritual enemy. If he can make us think that God hates us or wants to punish us, we’ll allow those thoughts to fill our minds, and we’ll start losing the battle.

God is love. We can never say those words enough. The only thing we can add is: and God loves me. Fear is a spirit that must be confronted head on—it will not leave on its own. We must proclaim the Word of God and command fear to leave. So the next time fear knocks on your door, send faith to answer!

Prayer of the Day: Lord Jesus, when I read Your Word, I find assurances of Your love for me. There are times, however, when I feel unworthy of Your love, but You never loved me because I’m worthy; You loved me because You are love. In Your name I pray, Lord Jesus, thanking You for Your reassurance that I am truly loved by You, and that therefore I have no reason to fear, amen.”

[readsandbreeds]

A Tipping of the Scales

ao3 link ao3 profile ship: batcat (reeves verse) warnings: none, smut 18+ word count: 10.2k

Selina Kyle didn’t believe in fairytales. Fables? Sure. Cautionary tales and Bible stories were more up her alley. After all, she had walked into her former kingdom, the prodigal daughter returning to slay Goliath and steal his crown. But the Bat had stopped her, stolen her vengeance, just like he had stolen himself away from her. 

Bludhaven was far more boring than she had expected. Despite housing the summer homes of the rich hedge fund types that she intended to knock down a peg, there were only so many jewels she could steal and resell. It didn’t bring her nearly the same amount of satisfaction as the Bat chasing her. Cat and mouse was the name of her game, or in this case, the cat and the bat. 

She often daydreamed about that night in Mitchell’s house, him holding her against the wall, his hand slapped over her mouth. The smothering of his arms was satisfying, and although she hated to admit it, those thoughts eventually raced into her head as she slept. 

That’s what had her returning to Gotham, and while she hated herself for being attention seeking, she couldn’t help herself. Something from the streets of Gotham would feel better than the empty loneliness she felt upstate. Even the strays she had found couldn’t fill the danger shaped hole in her heart. 

Her first break in was a testament to her roots. Lowering herself precariously through a skylight on her trusty rope, she landed almost soundlessly on her feet into the home of one Harvey Dent. While he took over Coulson’s role as DA, Selina was more than sure he was just as corrupt as his predecessor. A few stolen items would be the perfect welcome to his new position. 

It started with paintings. Forgeries of Rembrandts that were so close in detail that even curators couldn’t tell the difference. Somehow Dent never noticed, or maybe he didn’t even bother to check. She did replace the paintings, she wasn’t completely heartless. But… they were a tad explicit to say the least. Nudes of renaissance women were now completely scattered across the DA’s house. Maybe his coworkers would recognize him as a man with good taste. Or at least think he had a humorous interior designer. 

This was her third time hitting Dent’s house. He was new in town so to speak, so his security protocols were nowhere near as intense as someone like Bruce Wayne. Sometimes easy options are the best way to get back into an old trade, and if she had to fish for minnows, she was more than willing to do so.

But the Bat caught up, something that both scared and thrilled Selina. Yes, he played into her hand, but she doubted he would chase after her so soon. Maybe it said something about both of them. Her desperation for him to arrive, his desperation for her to slip up. 

“I didn’t think you’d stoop this low,” he said, revealing himself from the shadows of Dent’s dining room. 

“Had to tell you I was back in town somehow,” Selina replied coolly. “Besides, a stolen inheritance only lasts for so long.” 

“Then work with me again,” he replied. To anyone else’s ear he would’ve seemed nonchalant, but Selina had learned to read every little inflection of his voice and every single twitch on his masked face. 

It was the same voice he used when he told her not to throw her life away. Those few sentences were the most vulnerable she had seen him and the most vulnerable she had allowed him to see. 

This was his way of reminding her that she didn’t have to pay, no matter how she decided to do it. 

“Now why would you want me to do a thing like that? Did you miss me Vengeance?” Selina tried to say coyly. The waver in her voice gave her away. He remained silent for a few moments, long enough that Selina felt the need to fill the silence. 

“Yes,” he said. His heart was clearly pounding out of his chest. There was a crack as he said the word, both in his voice and in Selina’s heart. She felt herself step forward towards him, the Warhol she had intended to snatch ignored behind her.

“Yeah?” she whispered. Vengeance gave a nod so slight and short that she almost missed it. 

“Okay,” Selina nodded, swallowing her pride and every little word she wanted to say to him. This was not the reaction she had expected. She had expected anger, a reenactment of that first night at Mitchell’s house, maybe ending with her bent over Dent’s desk.

She didn’t expect a confession between the two of them that only needed one word. Selina is snapped out of her thoughts as the Bat begins talking again. 

“As in actually working together,” he said. “That means stopping… this.” 

“A girl needs to make a living somehow,” Selina shrugged. 

“Then I’ll pay you,” he said as though it barely meant anything. 

“You really are a rich boy,” Selina scoffed, her eyes returning to the painting. 

“I’m being serious, Selina,” he replied. “I’ll make you a real suit too.” 

“Are you too scared to be associated with a cat burglar? You want a thief to play buddy-buddy with Gordon?”

“He saw you save my life and me save yours,” the Bat states. “If he doesn’t trust you, then he doesn’t get to trust me.”

“Wow, determined to lose one of your only friends if it means spending time with me, huh?” A smirk grows across Selina’s face.

“If that’s what it comes down to, I’d rather say I was trading one out for another.” 

Selina refuses to acknowledge the blush that begins to spread across her face by staring at the Warhol, pretending to be intrigued. 

“Can I take this one still? As a last hurrah?” The Bat simply shook his head.

“It’s not like you would listen to me, Selina. I know my place,” he said while walking towards her. A black leather glove tilts her chin up to look at him. “Do you know yours?”

Selina miraculously avoids leaning into the Bat’s touch. She thanks whatever God above is stopping her from doing so. She could get used to his hand on her cheek, used to someone pretending to care.

“I don’t go so easily,” she says instead. 

“I wouldn’t expect any less of you,” Selina thinks that he gives her a hint of a smile. How is it possible that something so small could be so beautiful? 

“You should leave,” Selina nods towards the skylight. “Before you’re accused of any implications.” 

“You’re too smart to leave a trail behind,” he scoffs. 

“And you’d ruin my life,” God, Selina thinks. As if he hasn’t already. He shakes his head. 

“You don’t deserve that,” his hand trails down her shoulder, eventually gripping her own. “Especially after everything you’ve worked for.” 

Her heart is in her throat, she’s mirroring the panic he felt the moment he landed besides her. She’s always seen him as nervous, as hidden. It’s unfair that she’s carrying those same traits because of him.

“Meet me at the signal, next time it’s on,” his voice is a whisper. It’s her final out, his final plea. She caves and gives him a nod. One motion, one silent agreement. Two people, one silent confession.

He goes right away, leaving her with her tools and the soon to be stolen Warhol. She sighs while she readjusts her gloves, carefully sliding the painting off of its place on top of the mantle. She puts a painting of a woman fingering herself in its place. 

Just another day, but her final job. Her life was about to get much more interesting. To be fair, it was her own damn fault. Maybe she should’ve stayed in Bludhaven. Even cats have to be careful about what they wish for. 

*

The signal is on the next night. Selina doesn’t know what she expected, he was spoken for, that was why he had stayed. Gotham needed its knight, and it looked like she was about to be his sidepiece. 

She didn’t bother taking the elevator up to the signal, climbing the pulleys and scaling the building was much more fun. Gordon was already there, but the Bat was late. Typical. 

“Well,” Selina sighed upon seeing Gordon next to the signal. She couldn’t think of anything to say to him. They had interacted only a handful of times, all of which were at a major low point of her life. 

“You’re back in town,” Gordon nodded. “He didn’t tell me.”

“He only found out recently, even though all of the pieces were there,” Selina shakes her head. “He’s not nearly as smart as he pretends to be.”

She couldn’t tell if she said that to make her feel better about herself or if she truly believed it. The truth was that the Bat could have found her at any point. Hell, he could’ve been tracking her while she was upstate. He probably was. 

“How… are you?” Gordon was clearly just as uncomfortable as she was. Thank God that was when the Bat decided to arrive. 

His presence was not comforting, but it certainly made the tension in the air less thick. He nods at Gordon, who simply looks between the Bat and the Cat with a wary eye.

“What am I supposed to call you?” Gordon asks. 

“... Cat,” she says, trying to stifle a laugh. 

“Right,” Gordon turns his attention back to the Bat. “There’s been a series of robberies from Harvey Dent’s penthouse, would you happen to know anything about that?”

Bat’s eyes flicker towards Selina. 

“The situation has already been dealt with,” he replies, voice steady yet full of gravel. “The thief has been apprehended, but the paintings will likely not be returned.” 

“Let me guess, they’ve already been sold,” Gordon sighs. Selina has never had the urge to laugh this severely in her whole life. She notices Batman swallow. He clearly finds humor in this exchange as well. 

“I would assume so.”

“And the thief?” Gordon says, pinching the bridge of his nose. 

“Even some criminals are too slippery for my hands,” Batman replies. “But I swear that the issue is resolved.”

“But what if-”

“I made a deal,” he said, cutting Gordon off. “The thief is a source of intel now. They have very quick hands.” 

Gordon looks over at Selina, whose face is red as a tomato at this point. He nods.

“I see,” he turns back to the Bat. “And would this thief happen to be a cat burglar of some kind?”

“I think that’s an accurate description, yes.” 

Gordon’s sigh somehow becomes deeper. It isn’t out of frustration, more a sense of disappointment. Selina was clearly important to the Batman, and shutting her out would mean losing him as a resource. 

“I have to tell the department and the DA something,” Gordon rubs his hands together. “Otherwise they’ll go sniffing around like hounds.”

Selina resisted the urge to make a comment about cops and bitches. Instead she offered a half assed solution. 

“Well, I won’t pull any profitable pranks for the time being,” Selina began. “So you don’t need to worry about me. Maybe mention something about an art burglar in some city nearby. Throw them off their trail. There are other art thieves, I’m willing to expose a few of them.”

“Who knew that cats could become rats,” Gordon muttered. The joke didn’t seem to be out of malice, but Selina’s skin began to crawl. 

“I prefer to catch them,” she said defiantly. “If I reveal someone, it’s a bitch that deserves it,” Selina stares pointedly at the Bat. “Are we done here?” Vengeance looks at Gordon in response. 

“Yes,” Gordon nods, sighing at the two vigilantes in front of him. “I’ll see you next time the signal is lit. Get some rest.”

“Gotham never sleeps,” the Bat replies.

“Rich kid and you had an emo phase,” Selina grumbles. “Actually you’re still in your emo phase.” Ever perceptive, she notices a half smile on Gordon’s face as he takes the elevator down. 

“Is it alright if I take your measurements?” the Bat asks quietly.

“I’m sorry?” This question hits Selina from left field, stunning her out of the witty quips she had been planning. 

“For the suit,” he clarifies. Right, the suit. The special matching suit. The suit that he would make for her. His suit for her. And he would have to touch-

“Yeah,” her response thankfully stops her from overthinking too much. “That’s totally fine.”

The Bat had a goddamned measuring tape on his utility belt for some reason. God knows if he’s diligent enough to measure foot prints at crime scenes, trying to match shoe sizes with criminals. Selina wouldn’t put it past him. 

“I need you to raise your arms,” his voice is too soft. Why is it so soft? Selina obeys his request so that her head will hopefully stop racing. Unfortunately, her heart begins to instead. 

The tape goes around her throat, his lithe fingers carefully marking off the number of centimeters that would be required for the turtleneck hem that she'd grown to prefer. He’s careful every step of the way, from arm measurements to the tightness of her waist and hips. Selina prays for the first time in years that the Bat can’t magically sense her pulse as his hands gently touch her chest. It’s supposed to be a very clinical procedure, simply a girl and her caped seamstress. Yet every brush of his gloves against her body makes a part of her tense. 

He shouldn’t have this effect on her. It’s not as though he’s special in any way. The Bat is a man that hides behind a mask and beats up thugs in tight fitting kevlar. Just because he wants Selina to help him with work does not mean he wants her in any other way. He saved her so she wouldn’t sin. He saved her from herself. That was all. 

But it’s clear to Selina that touching her is having an effect on him as well. The Bat always tries his damndest to seem stoic, untouchable, unmovable, but Selina is more than sure that underneath his mask is a scared man. He was scared on that catwalk, enough to shoot his leg full of adrenaline to save her. He was scared that she’d say no as he found her in Dent’s dining room. And he was scared now, that she would leave, that this was too far. 

“Are you almost done?” Selina asks sweetly, trying to not let her voice warble. It’s the same voice she uses on the strays she finds in street alleys, coaxing them towards her gently. Little does she know that she pulled this stray in a long time ago.  

The Batman nods, putting the tape back into some unseeable part of the belt. Despite being around him for so long, Selina still couldn’t wrap her head around his equipment or how he got the funding for it. Maybe the rich kid theory wasn’t so far off. 

“Any requests?” he asks.

“About the suit?” Batman nods. “Then no,” Selina replies. “What do I call you?”

“Excuse me?” Despite not being able to see them, Selina knows that his eyebrows are knitted together. 

“I can’t call you Bat all the time. Or Batsy, or Vengeance. The nicknames clearly annoy you, and while annoying you is one of my favorite pastimes, I’d like a piece of you that’s exclusively mine,” she finishes.

Selina lets her nails trail up the Bat’s chest, running her hands slowly across his shoulders. She’s reaching up to him, like a sinner up to heaven. He’s so tall, she wonders how it would feel to cower under him. 

“I-”

“It doesn’t have to be too much,” she says, her voice once again turning to honey. “I understand the secrets. I kept mine from you, and yours certainly have more weight.”

“Secrets always matter,” he whispers. “No matter the size. No matter who they protect.” 

Did he mean her or him? Did he mean Gordon? Did he have anyone else to protect at all? She doubted it. Cracks of loneliness broke out of him every time she was near. He needed a way to get it all out. Not only was he clearly touch starved, he needed some form of love to fill in the gaps. 

“I’ll call you whatever you want,” Selina smiles. “It can be as ridiculous as you like. Honey-bunches of oats, sweetie pie, pumpkin, twat waffle, banana-”

“B,” he finally cuts her off before she can say something even more dumb. “You can call me B.”

“Not V for Vengeance? B for Batman,” she teases.

“No, B for me,” he says. It’s one less secret for him, and one more for her. She nods. 

“I’ll see you at the next light, B,” she whispers. He disappears into the shadows. 

*

Selina turns over a single initial in her head. B is what she has been allowed to call him. B is her name for him. It’s also clearly the start of his first name. Not B for the Bat, B for him. 

Her thoughts are disrupted by a knock at her door. She rushes to answer it, but is tentative as she peers through the peephole. A man walks away with a parcel in front of her door. She quickly opens it, trying to get a better look at the man.

“Hey!” she calls, stopping him in his tracks. She picks up the parcel, looking at a sticky note on the front. The man doesn’t make any moves to run away. He simply stares as she reads the note. 

“Let me know if it fits, B.”

“You know him?” Selina stares at the man. She gets a closer look at him. Salt and pepper hair and a clearly pressed suit. This was not her Bat. 

“Yes,” his British accent startles her. 

“How so?” she asks right away. Everyday her theories about the Batman were becoming more plausible, yet they were always an inch or two off. 

“I’m an associate of your partner, Miss Kyle,” the man says. He seems to be very straight forward, not hiding behind words like the Bat often does. 

“So he talks about me,” Selina says, inspecting the box. “I’m flattered.” 

“Well, he does not get out much. I would be remiss not to notice a new person in his life.”

“What do I call you?” Selina asks, trying to ignore that she must bring some sort of comfort to the Bat. “I have a feeling I’ll be seeing you around much more.” 

“Alfred,” the man says with a curt nod. “I look forward to working with you Miss Selina.” 

“Likewise,” she replies. “Thank you.” 

“My pleasure,” Alfred says. He walks down the shabby hallway, his oxfords the only nice thing to be seen in her apartment complex. 

Selina walks back into the apartment, opening her new package with care. Even the box seems special, not a reused Amazon parcel. It feels like she’s opening a gift from Tiffany’s as she pulls at the rope like twine holding the carefully wrapped box together. 

The suit is much more lightweight than she expected. The Bat must pay more attention to the way she works than she thought. The suit is paneled with kevlar in the most vulnerable and damageable places. It reminds her of the shoulder and knee pads she would wear as a child while roller skating. Of course the suit is heavier, but it’s breathable. She’d be able to move in it swiftly and wouldn’t have to adapt her style of attack. The Bat’s fighting strategy fit the bulkiness of his suit. Strong and armored to match the hard hitting punches he pulled. 

It fit perfectly, hugging her body skin tight. She didn’t ask for this specific fit. Perhaps the Bat was being self indulgent. Selina shook her head, he was just being practical. Something that hung off her even slightly would be uncomfortable, clinging to her skin with sweat like a wedgie. 

The material was so soft that part of her wanted to fall asleep in it, but she knew if she didn’t return the suit back into its box, it would be covered in cat hair in no time. Selina put away her suit, placing it with care at the top of her closet before going to feed her harem of cats. They were constantly needy, but she didn’t mind. She needed them just as much as they needed her. She wondered if the Bat was the same way. 

*

Another day and she was back at the signal, sitting cross legged on the concrete floor as she and Gordon waited for the Bat to arrive. 

“Is he always this late?” she asked. 

“Yes,” Gordon says. “I don’t mind, he’s likely in the middle of a street fight.” 

“I wonder if the Bat was this tardy at prep school,” Selina says off handedly as she inspects her nails. 

“What makes him so sure that he’s rich?” 

“When you don’t grow up well off, you tend to notice the little details. Besides, his budget seems insane,” Selina says all of this as though it’s incredibly obvious. “Also I think I met his butler the other day.” Gordon nods throughout her explanation. 

“I can see that. Any ideas as to who he would be?” Selina simply shakes her head. 

This is a lie. Every night she tries to pair the letter B. She thinks of bright blue eyes emphasized by black makeup. His jawline is sharp and his body is likely littered with scars. Selina isn’t sure whether or not he’s lean yet built underneath his armor or simply awkwardly bulky. It’s frustrating to her in a way. She can’t picture him clearly when she. . . 

The sound of the elevator snaps her out of her thoughts. 

“I got your message,” Gordon says. 

“You get actual messages from him?” Selina replies, mildly incredulous. “He just shows up at my house unannounced.” The Bat ignores her.

“Have you heard anything else about the gas?” he asks. Gordon nods. 

“There’s been a few incidents on the Eastside of town. The standard green type poison.”

“Care to fill me in?” Selina looks between the two of them.

“Mysterious gaseous poison is showing up around town, usually around poorer neighborhoods,” the Batman explains.

“Do you think the targeting is intentional?” Gordon asks. Some detective he was. 

“It wouldn’t make sense after the Riddler’s message. If it was a follower of his, the chemical weapons would likely target the upper class.”

“Do you know the effects?” Selina didn’t live on the Eastside of town, but she could already tell that she would be sent there as an on the ground scout. 

“It’s been different for the victims so far,” Gordon says. “All have been sent to Gotham General Hospital and are being monitored 24/7. The most common symptom is disfigurement, which makes sense. That being said, many of the victims are gaining… for a lack of better words, powers.”

“What, like superheroes?” Selina lets out a singular short laugh. “What lame fanboy is behind this shit?”

“I reckon it’s a scientist,” Gordon replies. “The goal is clearly experimentation. Maybe making some sort of army to infiltrate Gotham’s streets.”

Selina watches the Bat close his eyes for a moment, too fleeting for Gordon to notice. He had inspired the Riddler. He had inspired thugs. Maybe he was still Vengeance. Maybe he was too late to become Hope. 

“The chemical composition is particularly advanced,” the Bat says before he can overthink. “I’ve been trying to analyze samples at home, but I’ll need more. Since different types of gasses have different effects on victims, I should try to breakdown every type.”

“GCPD forensics is also on the case,” Gordon replies. “I’ll try to snag different samples of the variants for you.”

“I’m assuming you want me on the ground?” Selina says with a raised brow. Gordon nods, but the Bat’s jaw tenses. 

“I’ll take care of it,” she confirms before heading to drop down from the pulley. The Bat snatches her hand as she turns.

“Can I have a word with you?” he asks softly. Selina nods. 

“I’ll see the two of you later,” Gordon says, looking between the pair. The Bat does not release his grip on Selina until he hears the elevator begin to creak downstairs. 

“I don’t want you gathering samples,” he says immediately. 

“I’m sorry what?” 

“You’ll be put in danger.” Selina looks around in confusion, half of her wanting to scream ‘what’ and the other half wanting to scream ‘the fuck’. 

“B, you’re the one who asked me to be your partner.”

“Yes-”

“You literally attract danger B,” Selina says. “If you didn’t want me in danger, you wouldn’t have asked me to be here.”

“That’s different,” he insists. 

“How?” Selina almost yells. Her voice grows louder by the sentence. “You asked me to be a part of this team, that means contributing. You want me to be your bait every single time? Put me in the club to drag out the goons under Oz? What do you want from me B?”

“I want you safe-”

“Then why did you ask for me back?” Selina cuts him off. “The other day you asked me if I knew my place. I do, and that’s here.” She walks closer to him, trying to sooth herself and hide the rage that had bubbled up moments ago. 

“I’m sorry,” he whispers back. “I promise I want you here, I do, I just-”

“Just what?” There is no malice in her interruption this time. If only people could see how truly expressive the Bat was. Everytime he and Selina meet, she notices the cracks within him growing and growing. 

“I almost lost you during the flood,” his voice still low. That softness is back, the kind that contradicts his entire appearance. “I almost lost so many people, and that is a sort of fear that I cannot let constrict myself while I protect this city.”

“B,” Selina walks closer, the two of them almost chest to chest. “Whether you like it or not, you are danger, and the people around you know that. They would willingly risk everything to be by your side.”

“Why do you think I keep my circle so small?” She can’t tell if this is a joke or a sad confession.

“Either way,” Selina says, shaking herself from her thoughts. “I’m honored to be a part of it. And I want to be. I want to be here.”

He knows this, no matter how much she doubts herself. Selina is a stubborn woman, and like a cat, she does not come quickly. He had given her several outs, but the Bat always had a way of talking himself down. 

“Okay,” he whispers. Selina is satisfied with his answer for the time being. She resists the urge to touch his face. To test him in the same way he had tested her at their reunion. Would he lean into her touch? Would he fail the task that she had succeeded?

She gives in, her gloves in her back pocket long ago. Her skin is on his, and despite the December chill, his face is warm. His scruff pricks at her fingers and Selina knows that her thoughts will be full of this interaction for the next few weeks. The Bat swallows, Adam’s apple bobbing at the sudden touch. She can tell that he’s starved of this. If his inner circle is as small as he suggests, there’s likely no one else tending to his physical needs.

“I-” he begins, voice half choked from such a simple touch. He clears his throat, hoping to get rid of the noise. “Alfred wanted me to give you something.”

His comment doesn’t deter Selina. Instead she trails her hand down from his jawline to his chest, resting her hand over the sharp emblem plastered across it. 

“And what would that be?” The Bat produces an envelope for her from God knows where. 

“I don’t know what it says,” he promises. Alfred has insisted that he not read it. Somehow, his self control won.

“I’ll open it later,” Selina stares at the stationary. “You can always reach me.”

“I know,” he nods. She feels dumb for stating the obvious. They both knew that she still had the contacts. The moment is over, they both should leave. Neither of them moves to do so. 

“I’ll be safe,” She only says it to reassure him. It doesn’t work. 

“You’re too curious for your own good.” Selina lets a puff of air come out of her nose. 

“Well you know what they say…” She trails off. 

“I don’t want you to kill the Cat.”

“You do know the rest of the saying? Right?” It’s a genuine question on her part. 

“Of course.”

“Then you know that I’ll put myself in harm's way despite your warning,” Selina says. “I’ll keep putting myself in danger.”

They both know what she means. There’s far too many of these between them. These unspoken promises. But there’s a sense of relief in knowing that she will stay. That she won’t run off to Bludhaven again. Selina hopes that she won’t break that promise, but fleeing is unfortunately in her nature. She flees now, nodding and trying desperately to ruin the moment. To ignore the feeling blossoming in her cheeks, her heart, her stomach. 

The two of them don’t say a verbal goodbye, simply scaling down the building. It’s better practice than taking the elevator. It’s much more practical. 

She opens the envelope when she gets home. Selina isn’t quite sure what she expected. Envelopes remind her of long meandering letters and missed bills. There’s only a small note inside with a phone number scrawled across it in perfectly neat cursive. 

“For emergencies, Alfred.”

“Thanks Alfred,” she whispers to herself. She’s sure that the Bat would disapprove if he knew she had this information. Not because he’s worried about risking his identity, but because it was one more tug into his world. Into danger. 

Selina promised herself she would only use the number in emergencies, just like Alfred had asked. She only wondered how much trouble the two of them would get into

*

The next time she sees him is two days later. Gordon has her number now. Not only is it a way to keep her in the loop, but it also seems like a way to keep her on a leash. 

They start planning simple patrols on the Eastside of town. The Bat has designed a mask to go with Selina’s suit that should filter any toxic gas she comes in contact with. He fusses over her suit, worried about how breathable the fabric is. Something about gasses seeping through the material and touching her skin. 

She doesn’t let him alter it, embarking on the mission with only the face mask as her newest wardrobe addition. It goes off without a hitch. She manages to capture several of the toxins successfully. Gordon takes any duplicates with him to the forensics lab for study, while the Bat takes his own samples home to analyze himself. Selina thinks he’s anal retentive, but understands his suspicions. Corruption does not go so easily. 

The third mission, he insists on going on the ground with her. It’s clearly a protective part of him. Despite their conversation, her words have not comforted him completely. It’s disappointing to Selina, perhaps she misread the level of trust in their relationship. Would there ever be a day where he could open himself up to her completely? 

The two of them stake out on different parts of the Eastside. Selina stays north while the Bat remains south. Selina tries to rationalize why he was doing physical work with her instead of analyzing her movements behind a computer screen. 

Part of her understands, he hasn’t done any ground work since Gordon, him, and Selina had started looking into this case. He was probably itching for a fight and in a sense, redemption. Being on the street means protecting the victims of Gotham’s brutality. It means gaining the faith of the city’s population. The flood was just the first step. Every day she sees the guilt behind his eyes, the thought that he has yet to do enough. As often as she calls him Vengeance, she knows that he is trying to distance himself from the moniker. Calling him Hope feels too personal, no matter how much she wants to know more about the man behind the mask. 

He is distant. He is the watchful eye at the side of rooms, calculating every single move, hearing every single whisper. Selina prefers to be in on the action, collecting the information first hand. She supposed that was why he eventually caved in to her pleas of doing groundwork. To be fair, he had given her that position first, long ago when she put on her earpiece at the Iceberg Lounge for the first time. 

Coms are set as they prowl the town, his voice in her ear and hers in his. Selina had always thought of the Bat’s voice as gravel. Hard yet small rocks that could cause you to slip, crafty enough to stick in your skin for days on end. She now realizes he is sand. Some call it coarse and rough, once again clinging on in the most irritating of ways, making its mark on those who dare touch it. But Selina has always loved escaping to the beach. Keeping the sand between her toes, soft like a blanket despite the heat of the sun.

Cats did like to sunbathe. 

“See anything on your end?” his voice startles her from her thoughts.

“Nothing of note. The blocks seem fairly clear at the moment, nothing rising up from the sewers just yet.” 

Victims had described the way that the gas had surrounded them, coming from potholes and sewer grates as they walked to corner side bodegas. The Bat had theorized about the creator of this weapon before. Experimenting on members of Gotham’s higher society would cause too much attention. However, the chemist's attempts had been successful so far, with almost every victim gaining some sort of ability after their attack. The disfigurement was the one constant among the patients.

“I think I’ll move back to your side of town,” Selina says. “He’s been striking over here most often. I wouldn’t be surprised if he wants to test a different sample size.”

The Bat makes an affirmative noise in response, giving Selina the go ahead to jump on her motorcycle and speed across the Eastside of Gotham. All was well, the engine of her motorcycle the only noise comforting her as she rode. 

Suddenly there was a yelp. The Batman does not yelp, he barely even winces through pain unless he is knocked down flat on his back. 

“Baby?” Selina says. She is not panicking, there is no need to panic, she’s simply  overthinking.

“Selina,” he almost whimpers. The reassuring lies she had told herself immediately disappear. She can panic now.

“I’m coming baby,” she says, voice steady. “I’m coming, tell me where you are. I need to know where you are.”

The Bat lists off street names, teeth obviously grit together. Selina weaves through cars, her speedometer rising and rising and rising. She literally dumps her bike when she sees him lying down in an alley. A green liquid seeps through the mesh parts of his suit and realizes the horrible smell that’s wafting over her is the scent of burning skin. 

“B,” she practically screams as she runs towards him. “Oh my god. Okay, this is gonna be okay baby, you’re gonna be okay.” She still can’t tell if she’s telling herself this or him. 

She realizes what she must do. Her fingers swiftly dial the phone number Alfred gave her. 

“Miss Selina,” Alfred says after the first ring. “Is everything alright?”

“There’s been an incident with the chemicals. I don’t know what to do, I don’t know where to go-”

“Are you safe?” His voice is surprisingly level. 

“It’s not me, it’s him,” she tries not to cry. 

“Who, who are you talking, t-to-” her Bats manages to spit out. 

“He took the car, correct?” Alfred’s voice still sounds calm, but there’s a hidden fear behind his sterile words. 

“Did you take the car?” she asks him. He only nods in response, the movement jagged and sharp. She doesn’t bother asking him if he can move. 

Selina drags him towards the Batmobile, his arm draped over her shoulder as he limps along to help her carry his weight. She finds his keys on his belt before hauling him into the passenger seat and putting it down in a lying position. Selina straps him down in every possible area. By this time, the poison is no longer visible, likely soaking into his bloodstream from some unhealed open wound on his body. 

“Where do I go?” Selina chokes out to Alfred. He’s silent. He has a choice to make. 

“Turn on the car, plug your number into the touch screen,” he orders. She obeys at once. “I’ll send you directions. I’m sure you know how to drive a manual car?” Selina nods before she remembers that Alfred can’t see her.

“Yes.”

“Good. The mechanics of the vehicle are simple despite its appearance,” the directions suddenly appear on the screen. Alfred’s voice suddenly runs through the speakers once she starts driving. 

“Alfred,” Bats’ voice growing raspier by the minute. The poison must have some control over his airways as well. “Don’t let her see, don’t let-”

His eyes begin to close and Selina silently prays that he’s merely passing out. With the amount of times she’s prayed to God recently, she might have to take up mass again. 

The map leads her down into a subway system and she speeds despite the bumpiness of the tracks. She’s driving too fast to notice the name Wayne Enterprises plastered across the walls. Alfred is waiting for as she pulls in. The only sounds keeping her focused is the stall of the mobile’s engine and the screeching of bats. 

Alfred rushes over to the passenger side, unbuckling the Bat. Selina moves towards him, holding his feet as Alfred carries his head. He’s placed on top of a table and Alfred begins to dismantle the kevlar suit of armor that hides him from Selina. 

“How can I help?” Selina forces herself to ask. Focusing on the task at hand may help her forget the severe extent her emotions are having on her. 

“There’s charcoal water in the fridge. We’ll need to force feed it to him. If not, an IV. Hopefully it will bind it to the poison and stop further absorption into his blood,” Alfred says as he takes off the shoulder pads. “There should be a ventilator in the closet door by the elevator.” 

Selina does as he says, pushing the ventilator on rolling wheels towards the table before dashing to a mini fridge close by. When she arrives, the Bat is completely shirtless. Her eyes widened for a split moment as she took him in. He is lean like he had suspected, but defined and bulky around the muscles that he most often uses while fighting. She shakes her head before setting the water on the table next to Alfred, who has begun to run blood tests.  He stops once a needle is placed into the Bat’s vein. 

He stares at Selina. He looks as though he is about to cave in. 

“I need to run upstairs,” he says, looking between the body on the table and Selina. “I…”

“I won’t look at him,” Selina swallows. No matter how curious she has become, she knows that curiosity would kill her. And her curiosity could also kill him. “I promise.” 

“That is the issue Miss Kyle,” Alfred says. “I need you to check for head wounds.” Selina tries and fails to stop her mouth from gaping.

“I, I-” Selina begins to stutter. She berates herself. This was not the time to be at a loss for words and she quickly attempted to pull herself together. “Why can’t you do that?”

“Either way you will see his face, Miss Kyle,” Alfred says. “This is a two person job and our maid Dory is squeamish around blood.” 

“I can’t break his trust like that,” she says, tears beginning to prick at the corners of her eyes. “I can’t take a secret with that much weight. He isn’t ready-”

“We have no choice,” Alfred says firmly. “I will gather supplies upstairs while you check. I know you are far too intelligent to run off with this information.” Alfred begins to head towards the elevator before stopping in his tracks. His eyes soften as he turns around to look at her. “I also know you care far too much about him to tip the scales in your favor.”

Selina nods and waits for Alfred to go upstairs before turning back to face her Bat. Her B.

“Please forgive me,” she whispers. “I understand if you never can. You have given me bits at a time and now I have to take this, for your sake.” 

She slowly removes his cowl, much like a child refusing to rip off a bandaid. Selina doesn’t dare look into his eyes once it is removed, making herself move around parts of his hair to look for blood. There seems to be none as she maneuvers his head in her hands. After five minutes of avoidance she forces herself to finally look at his face. 

Selina gets to swim in those blue eyes up close. His makeup is smeared down the sides of his cheeks, raccoonish in a way that would be adorable if not for the circumstances the two of them were in. His hair is flopping down into his face now, covering his eyebrows. The Bat does not move at all as she investigates him. His skin is still soft despite the familiar stubble. 

There’s a flicker of recognition as she stares and stares and stares. Whatever could the letter B mean? He has a maid, he has a butler, and he clearly has connections. The rich part of her theory is correct. 

It hits her all at once. A man that she had once despised pops into her mind. This is Bruce Wayne. 

This is where the money goes. After the flood, the Wayne Foundation began to rebuild, donating millions of dollars to the rebuilding of Gotham. Wayne made frequent public appearances, moving onto the front lines to pull civilians out of the wreckage. His waders and mask made him fairly unrecognizable, but the media soon caught wind. It was clear that his actions weren’t meant as a publicity stunt. He gave no comment of his on the ground work when pestered by multiple journalists at press conferences. These small acts of kindness were what turned the tide on Selina’s opinion of Bruce Wayne. She had not been completely won over, but his dedication certainly made her heart crumble.

It seems that the Batman was not just a nocturnal animal, but rather a lonely child trying to fix his family’s broken legacy. The Bat began it all and the flood began to finish it. 

“Bruce,” she tries the name on her tongue. Despite her attempts to deny it, she had always found the man quite handsome. 

“Bruce,” Alfred whispers from behind her. She turns to face him, heart in her throat. 

“I…” Selina doesn’t know what to say. 

“Any head injuries?” Alfred may be asking out of concern for his adopted son, but also to distract Selina from the thoughts racing in her head. 

“No,” she says. 

“Well,” Alfred replies before changing into a new set of gloves. “Help me stitch him up.”

*

Bruce wakes up with a gasp and the weight of the world on his chest. Needles are pressed into both of his arms and he can feel cool sweat dripping down his forehead despite feeling overheated. 

He does not care about his condition, he only cares about-

“Selina,” Bruce yells, whipping his head around the room. Alfred, who had been sitting beside him, wakes up with a start. His hands instantly push Bruce back down on the table.

“She’s safe,” he says. “She’s upstairs. I told her to go to sleep.”

“She knows, doesn’t she?” Alfred nods. “How could you?” Bruce’s voice cracks. “Do you understand what you have done? The kind of people that she hates? I am dead to her now. I am nothing to her because that is what I have always been.”

“If you are nothing then why did I have to drag her upstairs?” Alfred asks. “Why did I have to force her away from your bedside so she could finally rest? Bruce, that woman has been beside you since she dragged you from that alleyway thirty six hours ago.”

Bruce swallows, looking down at the burn marks scattered across his chest. 

“Drink,” Alfred hands him a bottle of water. Despite wanting to spite the man, thirst takes over. 

“Were you able to take any of the poison?” Asking about the case will distract him from Selina. 

“I was able to separate some from your bloodstream. I wasn’t able to get much, but I sent a vial over to your friend at the GCPD and put the other in your lab.” 

“Thank you.” Bruce says. He genuinely means it, but his voice is still flat. Selina won’t be able to leave his mind for quite some time. 

“I’ll leave you alone for now,” Alfred says. “You should get some more rest before we move you upstairs to your room.”

Bruce stares at the wires and tubes extending from his body. He knows he has no choice but to comply. 

“Bruce,” his head snaps up to look at Alfred. “She cares about you.”

“She cares about the Bat,” Bruce says definitively. 

“No,” Alfred shakes his head. “Miss Kyle did not stop once she saw your face Bruce. She did not stop once. That worry she had when she took you home remained level the whole time. I dare say it increased once she saw the complete state you were in.”

Bruce tries to find comfort in Alfred’s words, but once again fails. Alfred leaves before Bruce can get another word out. He remains anxious until sleep overtakes him half an hour later. 

*

He sleeps in his room now. Alfred checks his vitals every day and brings him breakfast in bed. Selina has not visited despite living in the tower for several days. Part of Bruce wants to leap out of bed and confront her in his guest room, but cats spook easily, and miraculously he has yet to scare her off. He’d like to keep it that way. 

There’s an old episode of Buffy playing on the TV in his room. He’s too lazy to change the channel. Thankfully Alfred no longer forces him to have the IVs in at all times, giving him the chance to toss around in his sleep like he usually does. He tends to curl into a ball or sleep on his front, murmuring about case information as he barely gets rest. 

It’s while he turns over to the side that he hears a knock at his bedroom door. 

“What, Alfred?” Bruce grumbles.

“Not Alfred,” Selina replies, taking it as her cue to enter the room. Bruce’s head shoots up instantly, staring wide eyed at his partner standing in his room as though this was something that happened regularly. He might be clothed, but without the mask on he felt naked in front of her.

“Selina,” he whispers.

“B,” she whispers back, walking towards him. She carefully sits down next to him on the edge of the bed. There are words coming up her throat and she’s terrified they will come spilling out without rehearsal. 

“Why didn’t you leave?” Bruce’s voice cracks. Her eyes soften, just another tear for her to patch up. 

“You’re someone I care about,” Selina says, her hand reaching for Bruce’s. Her fingers carefully wrap around his. “I took something from you without your say. Secrets shouldn’t be stripped away like that.”

“You don’t owe me anything,” Bruce replies. If this was the only reason she was here, he’d prefer for her to leave.

“I’m here because you are a solace,” she admits. “You are a rope to cling onto while we race through the streets and I cannot let you go.”

“You can’t let him go,” Bruce says. Selina shakes her head, a breathy sad laugh leaving her. 

“No,” she replies. “I can’t leave you. Not the Bat, not Bruce, I can’t leave you.” 

Her hand moves from his back to his cheek. She’ll never get tired of touching him, never get tired of his reactions to the feeling. He gives instead of holding out like the two of them have done before, leaning into her palm. He has some control, as he tells himself not to nuzzle into it. 

She rubs her thumb gently over his lip before pulling herself completely onto his bed, legs folded over each other. Bruce lays back down from his upright position, head on the pillow as she plays with his hair. It’s tender, it’s sweet. The sound of the television makes the whole exchange feel domestic and Selina can’t help but to place a kiss on Bruce’s forehead. He audibly sighs at the feeling of her lips touching his brow. It makes her laugh just a little. 

“You truly are touch starved, aren’t you?” Bruce scowls at her words. “I’m just teasing you. Besides, I can change that.”

A sweet sigh leaves Bruce’s mouth at Selina’s words. 

“You’d like that wouldn’t you baby?” Bruce can only nod. “Let me know if I hurt you, or if it’s too much.”

He once again nods, too nervous to say anything. Selina pulls the covers off of Bruce gently before straddling his waist. She’s still cradling his head in her hands like a delicate piece of china. It’s then that she decides to kiss him. A small press of her lips against his, her hands moving down his chest as she leans into him. Bruce is quick to reciprocate, wrapping an arm around her waist, trying to find a way to deepen it. Selina laughs against his lips. A part of it is out of joy that she’s with him, the other at his endearing eagerness. 

“Slow down cowboy,” she mumbles, her smile still pressed against his.

“I’m trying, I swear,” he presses a kiss against her jawline to emphasize his point. The soft presses travel down her neck, nothing open mouthed, no teeth in sight. He’s simply applying pressure to one of the most modest yet sensitive parts of her, and it seems like he can’t get enough. 

“You can give me more,” Selina softly sighs. “I can handle it.” Bruce blushes.

“I’m not entirely sure I know how,” he mumbles into her skin. God was his inexperience cute. 

“Let me show you,” Selina all but purrs, pushing Bruce gently against the headboard and pulling his shirt off. Bruce freezes slightly once the shirt is off, but doesn’t make any effort to stop her. Selina herself decides to stop moving her wandering hands.

She stares across his chest. A treasure map of bruises, scars, stitches and the recent burns. She understands now why he stopped. Bruce looks down at her to see not disgust, but pleading eyes. 

“You’re not hideously scarred,” she whispers. Her fingers trail across a prominent scar just under his collarbone. She kisses it gently before moving onto one mark after another, almost as if her love could heal every single one. Bruce runs a hand over her short hair as she travels across his skin, trying not to tear up at her actions. 

“I want to take care of you,” he says, hands moving down her waist. “Let me take care of you. You’ve taken care of me.”

Just like she did, Bruce carefully removes her top. He seems to be a student who responds quickly by watching and learning. She guides his hands up and down her chest, moving one of his hands to unclasp her bra. It takes him a few tries but soon enough it’s off and discarded, leaving her torso completely exposed to him. 

He stares. It’s the only thing he knows how to do. Selina remains a patient teacher, moving to lay on her back so he can kiss down her chest just like she did to him. His tongue swirls a nipple, experimenting gently. Blue eyes watch her every move, searching for every little twitch and whine. His hands grip her closer, a desperate plea to make sure she doesn’t squirm away. He can’t have her escape now. 

They move down to the waistband of her leggings, teasing and snapping as he places kisses along her stomach now. Selina moves her legs wider in anticipation, not truly expecting him to make a move, but preparing in case he gathered the courage to pull her bottoms off. 

“It’s okay,” she whispers. “You can do whatever you’d like.”

“Do you promise to teach me?” Selina melts. 

“Whatever you want baby,” she rises back up to give him a soft kiss. “I’ll help you with whatever you want.”

That’s all Bruce needs to desperately pull off her leggings and panties. He spreads her legs, hands gripping her thighs tightly, already leaving red marks against her. He falters a bit, clearly realizing the situation he’s in.

“You don’t have t-”

“I want to,” Bruce nods enthusiastically. “I want to taste all of you.” Those words should not leave a shiver running down Selina’s spine, but they get to her nevertheless. 

Bruce situates himself back between her legs, pressing a kiss against the curls guarding her. He licks once, ever so slowly up against her cunt and feels Selina’s thighs begin to clench around his head. He takes this as a good sign, moving to do the action once again. This time Bruce stops at the little pearl at the top of Selina’s pussy. He was a smart man, he knew basic female anatomy, so Bruce decided that his best course of action was to suck. His tongue swirled around Selina’s clit, gathering the taste of girl onto his lips, leaving Selina to moan and beg and put her hands in his hair. 

“Fuck, you’re doing so good,” Selina whimpered. “That’s it baby, such a good boy.”

Bruce tries to ignore the way her praise goes straight to his cock. He distracts himself by tracing little figure eights on her hips, spelling her name out with his fingers. He kisses her hip bone, nipping at the fat of her thigh before tugging with his teeth. His tongue immediately soothes the red spot that follows.

“Fingers?” He whispers against her skin.

“Please,” she gasps out. “Fuck, please B.” Even as she lays in her bed Selina uses his name. Not the name he was given at birth, not the name that Gotham had given him, Selina uses his name. 

He fulfills her wish, his index finger breaching her and slowly moving in and out. He begins to explore, ever perceptive, ever the experimenter. Small crooks of his finger have her gasping and moaning the most. Her breathing halts when he touches a particular spot and that’s when he decides to abuse it. Adding a second finger into her, he pries her way open. The way she clenches around his fingers is delicious, but the taste of her is so much better. 

Bruce decides to dive back in, her clit on his tongue as his lithe fingers continue to play with her.

“Jesus Christ baby,” Selina groans. “Gonna cum if you keep touching me like that.”

“Isn’t that the goal?” Bruce replies, face slick with her. Selina nods vigorously.

“Yes, yes please, ye-” Bruce laps at her before she can continue to beg. She sounds like the crescendo in a symphony, rising higher and higher and higher before one final crest. Her breathing is a whole rest. Her sigh, the end.

“Are you sure you haven’t done that before?” Selina asks with a breathy laugh. 

“Don’t feed my ego like that,” Bruce says, chin still glistening. Selina kisses him then, the taste of her shared on their tongues as she grinds on his lap. She can feel his cock salivatingly hard through his boxers. 

“It’s unfair that I’m completely bare for you and I don’t get to see…” She plays with his waistband just as he had played with hers. Bruce gulps, simply out of nerves and the pleasure of being teased. “We don’t have to go further-”

“I need you to go further,” Bruce whispers. Selina obliges, taking his cock out with a gentle pull and tugging him up and down slowly. She doesn’t bother looking, she’d prefer to see this sight. Bruce Wayne in front of her with his eyes closed, head only supported by the headboard behind him. The first moan he unleashes at her first touch could easily be her favorite sound. She needs to ride him.

“Where do you want me baby?” She asks sweetly. She knows exactly where she wants to be. 

“Wanna feel, w-wanna-” It’s Bruce’s turn to stutter now. A time for him to get a taste of his own medicine. 

“Feel what angel?” Selina coos. “You can’t get it unless you tell me.”

“In you,” Bruce manages to sigh out. “Wanna be in you.”

“But where in me?” Selina asks coyly. She’s playing with her food just for the fun of it. “Come on baby, tell me.”

“Wanna feel your pussy,” Bruce whimpers, truly and beautifully whimpers. Selina has no choice but to say yes. 

“Of course baby,” Selina says, moving to put him inside of her. “How could I ever deny you?”

It’s then that she decides to finally look at his length, and God was it just the way she liked it. A little bit thick, a few extra inches, and enough for her to take everyday without being in pain. 

She sits herself down slowly, enjoying every single bit of the stretch. The noise Bruce makes when she gently puts the tip of his cock in is unhinged. Part growl, part gasp, Bruce swears that he is in heaven. Selina is the closest he would ever reach to it, and that was more than enough for him.

“You want me to move B?” Selina asks when she’s fully seated down. Bruce can only nod, too scared at what noise might come out of his mouth. She doesn’t tease him this time, merely beginning the slow bounce up and down as she rests her hands on his shoulders. 

Bruce reaches out to pull her flush against his chest, a hand on her back as he begins to thrust up into her, matching her rhythm. Selina sighs into his shoulders, clutching and desperately grabbing at his back. Despite her resolve, she claws at him. Long red marks traveling across his shoulder blades and spine. The pain seems to only encourage Bruce. It’s a sign that she’s more than enjoying herself. 

“Don’t know if I can-”

“It’s okay baby,” Selina coos. “You can cum in me.”

“Should’ve asked if-” Bruce gets out. “If safe, if-”

“I’m safe Bruce, I promise,” Selina presses a kiss to his shoulder. He was far more considerate than any man had been to her before when it came to protection. “You can cum in me, I want you to. Can you do that for me B?”

And Bruce could never deny her, just as he could never deny him. He finishes inside her with a sob, feeling slightly embarrassed at how soon the pleasure was over. Selina strokes his hair as he comes down, making no attempt to get off of him.

“You okay baby?” Selina caresses his face. It’s become one of her favorite things to do. Bruce is unable to speak, he only nods. “Do you wanna sleep?”

“Yeah,” his voice comes out hoarse. 

“Okay babe, let’s get you cleaned up,” Selina goes to move off before she’s tugged back against Bruce’s chest.

“No,” he grumbles. “Just stay.” He pulls the sheets up over them, maneuvering the two of them on their sides. Bruce’s cock remains in Selina as she wraps her legs around her waist. She’s too pleasure drunk to disagree, and if she felt this fuzzy, she could only imagine the high Bruce was going through. 

“Okay baby,” Selina pressed a kiss to Bruce’s head. “Sleep now.”

“Sleep now,” he mumbled. 

Selina remembered tragedy. She remembered her mother and Annika and the flood. She remembered the Waynes dead in the street and their son watching them carried in caskets down Main. 

She remembers that it brought the two of them together. That the scales would not have been balanced if not for their secrets. 

Selina Kyle may not believe in fairy tales, but maybe she could finally believe in the kindness of familiar yet distant strangers. 

She could finally rest. 

[godza]

wanna read my creative writing final? here it is. it’ll be edited a bit more but here’s what i have right now, i’d love criticism and comments ^_^ tw: suicide and drowning. praying this wont get me sent to guidance

It was a full moon around midnight, and the skies were completely clear. The moon reflected on the lake, the reflection lily-white on the dark water. She stood on the dock in front of the water, her nightgown waved in the silent wind, just as white as the moon’s reflection. She stepped forward slowly, the old wood creaked under her footsteps, the only sound beside the waves lapping against the dock.

One final step and it’d be over. She’d be plunging into the water and free. She took a deep breath, and bent her knees to ready herself to jump.

Splash! “What are you doing?” A head popped up from the water, and the girl stumbled backwards, landing on her behind.

The girl couldn’t believe what she was seeing. The stranger who popped up from the water was practically glowing. Her platinum hair stuck to her face, and gleaming droplets of water glided down her ivory collarbones. Her face was hard to see, it seemed like every beam of light in the world was drawn to her face, and the girl couldn’t stand to look at it without averting her eyes.

“What are you doing out here at this hour?” The woman floated in the water, only her shoulders visible.

“What are you doing in the water?!”

“Swimming, of course. But I don’t think a young girl like you should be out here in your night clothes.”

“You’re one to talk, you’re stark naked!” The girl stood up again and crossed her arms.

“Yes, but I’m not you, Miss Anne Burley. You have a big day tomorrow, so a teenager like you should be in bed.”

“How do you know my name?!”

“Oh honey, I know everything. I know you’re getting engaged tomorrow, and I know why you’re here at this hour.” The woman brushed some hair out of her face, and her hands glowed just as much as the rest of her. The wind didn’t seem to touch her, her hair stayed static in spite of the water being stirred up around her.

“Who are you?”

“You could call me an angel.” The woman smiled, her sun of a face shifting ever so slightly.

“An angel?” Anne was raised Catholic, but she always held doubt in her heart as to whether or not there truly was a God like the one in the Bible. “Do you know God?”

“If you want me to say yes, I do.”

“Why is an angel on Earth, and in this lake?” Anne squatted on the dock, her braid swayed in the wind.

“I came here to see you, darling. I want to stop you since you’ve never learned how to swim.”

“Why do you want to stop me? Is this divine intervention? God and you shouldn’t give a damn about me. Aren’t there better things for you to be doing then stopping me from offing myself?”

“There is nothing more important that I could be doing.” The moon glinted on the water and the waves lapped at the dock.

“Don’t try to stop me.” Anne stood and walked to the side of the dock and took a deep breath, steeling herself to jump into the darkness below.

“Would your precious Louise like to see your body washed up on the shore come tomorrow?” The woman’s voice became serious.

“Don’t mention her name.” Anne hissed, and turned back towards the woman in the water.

“Why? Do you think she hates you? Would she rather see you dead?”

“She made it very clear she doesn’t care for me.” Anne tilted her head back, blinking away the tears that obscured her vision of the moon.

“She just said she can’t be with you. That doesn’t mean she hates you. She wants the best for you.”

“The best for me was her. If I can’t have that, I’d rather not have anything at all.” The tears fell in earnest, hitting her bare feet and the dock.

“Oh, poor thing. Do you think Louise will want you dead? You think she won’t hug your water-logged corpse to her chest and blame herself? You think she won’t stroke your decaying skin and curse ” The woman cocked her head, her voice becoming condescending.

“You don’t know anything! Why are you trying to stop me? I don’t care what she’ll think, since she abandoned me, just like everybody else.” Anne jumped off the dock and into the water, the ripples from her plunge disrupting the reflection of the moon on the water.

She sank, and saw one last glimpse of the moon before she closed her eyes. It was distorted through the water, murky and gray-blue, but still a beacon of light.

Anne woke up in her bed. Her nightgown wasn’t damp, it was the one she wore the day before. She still had the letter she wrote to Louise on her desk, and the sun was still low in the sky, slowly rising. She was back to the morning her life went to shit.

ok thats it. shit is a fun word to end on. its loosely set in 1800s early 1900s bc all i write lately is set there

[lesbiansanemi]

I've never watched devilman crybaby but I would def read an essay about why it's a garbage fire lmao

OMG YES more people to convert to my "hating devilman crybaby, stop claiming it's high fucking art" agenda. I actually already typed out the entire thing and sent it to a mutual, but!! Here it is lmao

OKAY SO before we begin, I want to preface this by saying I've watched the whole devilman crybaby series all the way through twice, and the first half of it... three times, I believe? Also watched multiple "analysis" videos on it because my friend and I genuinely thought we were missing something, given the praise everyone else on the internet seem to give it (we were not, none of the analysis made sense and was all reaching lol). Also did some research on the original writer's intents and messages, to see if it lined up with the ways people were interpreting it (unsurprisingly, it did not haha).

I would also like to say that I am coming at this from the angle of an ace lesbian, so absolutely none of the male gaze driven horniness was appealing to me and thus could not distract me from how bad it actually was. I also was raised by a family of preachers and given Christian-based curriculum until I was thirteen and also then taught the Bible to other people, so I'm also very knowledgable about Biblical canon, and from that angle, can rip apart any of the Biblical "symbolism." I'm also a semester away from a Bachelors in professional writing, so the writing itself is also dicey. Basically I think I am qualified to abso-fucking-lutely just rip into this series at every angle, I like to cover my bases lmao. (I also genuinely really wanted to like the series just based on basic premise, because I adore things with Christian-religious angles, especially when they're deconstructions and supposedly "super gay" so it's not even that I went into it expecting/wanting to hate it)

First and foremost, the supposed romance between Akira and Ryo, which is generally what people like to point to for "how gay" the series, and how this segways into one of my main reasons for absolutely fucking hating the series. For one, the romance is not explicit. It does that typical anime thing where it's teased that they could have "deeper feelings than normal" but no part of it, in series is actually confirmed. However, it is more heavily implied on Ryo's side, which I know you said you've only seen the first episode, it's revealed that Ryo is literally Satan (which I will get more into that). The only other "confirmed" queer characters (two random side characters who get a graphic gay sex scene together and then become demons, and a lesbian who is brutally killed as soon as she (sort of) confesses to a straight girl), are also demons.

This is extremely shitty because in series it is canon that becoming a demon means you're more "entranced" in sin than the people who aren't. And the only gay characters are demons (the girl the lesbian confessed to who was straight was still human). Satan himself is queer. Which... sure, in certain circumstances I would absolutely love and think would be really cool, but given the context, it feels super gross to only have the gay characters become demons. It also implies that having casual sex or doing drugs is also "immoral" because only characters who become demons do those things. As seen in the first episode when literally everyone in that club becomes a demon.

Overall, there are a ton of super conservative subtle messages that people either ignore or just don't pick up on. It's not some pinnacle of "gay art" or a "tragic gay romance" it's just... vaguely uncomfortable and subtlety insinuates that queer romance is "other" or "sinful."

ON TOP OF ALL OF THIS, the series absolutely brutalizes all the female characters. For one, there are only three of significance in the entire series. Miki, the lead, underage girl who is constantly sexualized, and shown completely nude, and who has a weird psuedo-incestuous romance with the MC, Akira. The lesbian girl I mentioned above that I can't even remember the name of, if that tells you how relevant she actually was, and one female villain who had a graphic sex scene with Akira because she was in love with the demon who was possessing him and then immediately got killed.

So obviously, there is the general sexualization of all these female characters, but a lot of it was... nonconsensual? I won't go into much detail because all of it was so gross but both Miki and the lesbian character were taken advantage of graphically and violently.

The female characters' deaths were also a lot more graphic and violent than the male characters'? Everyone in the series dies except Ryo. The end of the series is God destroying the Earth and killing literally everyone (something I also have a lot of thoughts about). But for example, Akira, the main character, is killed after a really badly animated space battle between him and Ryo by being ripped in half. It is not shown, we just see part of his body afterwards. It's supposed to be very impactful (it is not, and very lackluster). Miki is literally ripped into pieces, impaled on sticks, and paraded around to taunt Akira. She's fridged in one of the most violent and brutal ways I have ever seen.

Basically, not only does the series insinuate that being queer in sinful, it also hates women. But hey! That's the closest to Biblically accurate it ever gets lmao

Now, absolutely disgusting handling of women and queer characters aside, the writing itself is... so terrible, and one of the things that ruined it was the weird horniness? Like for example there was the one scene that was supposed to be very intense and emotional, where Akira and Ryo are fighting (verbally), but the shot is for some reason focused on Miki's bare boobs (as she is unconscious and completely nude in Akira's arms during this entire scene?). This kind of thing happens over and over, and ruins so many supposedly emotional and impactful scenes.

But.... weird sexualization that ruins tone aside... the actual plot itself. I do not have much to say about it, because it is difficult to discern... what the actual plot is supposed to be. The series is rather unclear on that. But for the first 6-7 of the 10 episodes, it seems that it might be that Ryo is trying to figure out why people are turning into demons with Akira's help. The entire "investigation" is very haphazard, none of the information they find is coherent or makes sense, and then... Ryo decides to reveal the existence of demons to the entire world, and vast swaths of the population become demons. The last couple of episodes are basically a post-apocalyptic setting where so many people are becoming demons that the world is literally falling apart. Two of the ten episodes are about this. It is so rushed, and confusing, and makes no sense. The first time we watched it, my friend and I literally thought we missed an episode.

And then.... in the last episode... Ryo reveals he is Satan. There is no buildup. There is no reason for it. The episode starts and he's just like "haha! I am Satan!" (Also I feel it's important you know he is completely nude during this entire episode you do see his dick)

Kind of interesting that he's Satan? Except there was no foreshadowing, and it really just came way out of left field. Akira kills of a bunch of demons, and then begins fighting Ryo in outer space. This is when God destroys the entire Earth because... reasons. The existence of God had never even been discussed until this point, suddenly there's just meteors falling and boom, Earth is being destroyed, while Ryo and Akira are still fighting in.... outer space?

Like I mentioned above, Ryo ends up killing Akira, and there's this scene of them laying on an asteriod and Ryo is talking to Akira's corpse and then says "Why am I the only one still talking?" and it's supposed to be like... really sad (visually it was hysterical, I was laughing so fucking hard), and the whole point is that he supposedly "fell in love" with Akira and was doomed to kill him as a form of torture from God? Again, somewhat interesting, if any of this had actually been explored, or foreshadowed, or anything before like the final ten minutes of the entire series. Essentially it's a massive time loop designed to torture Satan. The Earth begins, Satan becomes a concept, human history unfolds, Satan is born as a human (??? for reasons that aren't clearly explained, or if they were I do not remember), "falls in love" while God destroys the Earth, rinse and repeat. Which like... dear god.

Like I adore a good time loop (Madoka Magica got the time loop of gay yearning so right, Devilman Crybaby is like the opposite end of the spectrum), but this one was so haphazard and awfully put together that it felt cheap and almost like a deus ex machina. I'm convinced the time loop idea was conceived super last minute because the writers genuinely did not know how to fix everything they'd fucked up at that point, and knew if God just blew up the world at the end with no other "explanation" people would be pissed

Ultimately and finally, the original writer of the series DMCB was based on wrote it to have an anti-war message, nothing to do with Satan "finding love" or anything like that. Any of these supposed "messages" people are reaching to find in it aren't... completely connected to the text, and not what the writer actually intended. And while it's true people can interpret art however they please, it just feels... like such a bad interpretation, all things considered, in this scenario

Essentially, horrible, awful series, unbearably horny (like bad bad horny, certain types of horny are very good, this was the worst horny imaginable), ugly animation, terrible treatment of characters, shitty plot. But if you like... disconnect your brain enough while trying to watch it it becomes hysterical because of how bad it is (bonus points if you watch it dubbed because the voice acting is so bad lmao). My friend and I have a rewatch every now and then and lose our minds because of how bad it is, it's actually fun haha

Anyways, this is my Devilman Crybaby rant/essay, I do hope it was mildly enjoyable for you alkdjfdkla

Like ultimately it could have been a good series? But it just... literally wasn't. It was so bad at like every angle, and I just think people who watch the series and come away from it thinking "wow that was such a good tragic queer love story" need to uh.... reexamine. I feel like some disconnect happened

[familyagrestefanblog]

What is this about the season 5 "Bible" being leaked? What happened, where and when??

And most importantly, is it any kind of trustworthy source and where can that be checked and confirmed?

Right now both here on Tumblr and on Twitter I see nothing but vague enough posts ABOUT the supposedly leaked season 5 Bible and while I'm glad that you guys in the ml spoiler tag didnt go total apeshit disregarding everyone else... I would still like to know and find out about this leak to be sure that someone out there isn't completely making a fool out of us other fans with a fake s5 Bible leak. I don't want to say that I don't believe this Bible leak exists at all, but it is suspicious enough that when I look it up I actually only find posts talking ABOUT the Bible, what it supposedly said and people asking to IGNORE said Bible. But never actually the Bible itself or anything DIRECTLY from the Bible that isn't just passed down words.

Cause I'm gonna be honest, Miraculous has a massive spoiler, leak and overall chaotic release culture unlike any other show I have witnessed yet. And we fans are completely desensitized to all of this and don't question this kind of stuff anymore the way we should. If there is any show I can see someone successfully pull of a fake final season Bible hoax right before the season starts its definitely Miraculous.

The only thing I found that I can say is definitely credible is that Thomas Astruc acknowledged the leak in a tweet and didn't call it out as a fake or anything right there and then

But even here it's important to not just jump to conclusions right of the bat and acknowledge that there is still a big grey area free for interpretation to be read in this tweet. There is NEVER just one way to read something like this and the original intentions behind it also can vary widely. I learned to be very VERY careful with vague stuff like this. Especially with as little information as I can actually find online for the Bible leak (much less the leak itself) I just wanna throw out there that this may not be a direct "no" to discredit it, but at the same time this also isn't a direct "yes" either.

It's an acknowledgment that the Bible leak exists and that there is something about the matter that Astruc definitely takes seriously. But what the aspect of the content of the Bible is that he takes serious and to what degree can not be said from the tweet alone.

Let's say hypothetically the Bible leak is a huge fake and incorporates 15 big informations about the season, 13 of it are bullshit but 2 actually managed to hit the nail on its head. Then for these 2 informations alone this tweet would be warranted since Miraculous leaks and spoilers have the tendency to go viral incredibly fast with people taking too much at face value. Miraculous is in an increasingly vulnerable position regarding potential fake leaks, more than any show I have ever seen.

Look, don't read this as me saying I deny the possibility of the Bible leak actually being real and that whatever is spreading around the internet right now is not to be taken seriously at all. Of course not.

I'm just asking to step back a bit, look at the situation at hand and the actual informations you have to go off of and question it more than just on face value. This is the internet, false information are spread like wildfire and theoretically speaking, every information you get on the internet should be questioned for its biased and background while being taken with a healthy dosis of caution.

I guess I'm not so much asking for you to not take the leaked Bible itself seriously, the situation I see probably just rubs me the very wrong way because I can't find too much substantial and credible when I'm looking for it online now which makes it seem like a prime example of people (especially young people/kids like the main audience for miraculous would be) being taken advantage of, manipulated through false information and desensitized to believing sourceless news/informations on the internet right of the bat.

I guess where I am getting at here at the core is to please be careful with informations and leaks like these. Check the sources, anything official you can put your trust in and most importantly take everything you see with a grain of salt. I'm not saying don't believe it at all, acknowledge the possibility that it might be true but keep at the back of your head that there are countless ways for this to have played out behind the scenes than you assumed at the first glance and that you simply don't know what the actual truth in this regard is.

Acknowledge the information but also acknowledge how little you know when it comes to big stuff like this, especially when there isn't alot to find source-wise. Miraculous is a fictional story so there is not too much harm being done to not take fact-checking this super seriously. But there are endless examples like this regarding the actual real world and real world problems where source wise you get just as little and people are getting taken advantage of and manipulated on grand scales by other people with the needed know how to believe false informations.

Miraculous is fictional but the desensitizing/manipulative nature leaks/spoilers can have (especially as massive as it always happens with Miraculous) are very much real and I guess I'm just asking you guys to be careful.

I find it hard enough to sometimes actually take any tweet of any of the ml screw members seriously and at face value because they simplify or straight up contradict what's going on it the show to a degree I refuse to support. And now someone anonymous leaked the s5 Bible and I can't find too much credible about it?

Yeah, I'm gonna take this with a HUGE grain of salt and wait for the show to actually air to see what happens.

[gatekeeper-watchman]

Overcome Being Overwhelmed and Be Not Troubled

Entering into God’s Rest 

How to enter into God’s Rest when you are weary from carrying a heavy load.

How can we overcome the feeling of being overwhelmed?  In the hour we live, there is so much to do with seemingly no time to get everything done.  Responsibilities seem insurmountable and we see no way out of the modern-day “rat race.”  The world around us seems to crowd us in with overwhelming circumstances, impending doom, and threatening evil, which adds additional stress to our already busy days. God wants us to be able to enter into His rest and learn to follow His leading in all things so that these foreboding things will not threaten us as He wants us to have His perspective.  God does not want us to live stressful lives when we face these kinds of circumstances.  We all, at times, find ourselves with more things that need to be done that just keep piling up, while we are unable to complete the things we already have on our “to-do” list. The Bible addresses this dilemma throughout its pages.  The book of Proverbs is a good place to start reading as it is a very practical book that can bring help and rest to our souls in our everyday lives.   (We offer a daily devotional book that is a mini-study of Proverbs which can be read in just 5 minutes a day). Go to this link:

God’s Wisdom for Daily Living

I want to share, as a Christian, the things that helped me to overcome this feeling of being overwhelmed and gave me the freedom to live my days in peace and joy. I want to give you some information on how to manage your time as well as your projects so you can do the same and enter into God’s rest spoken of in the New Testament.

Hebrews 4:1-11  Let us, therefore, fear, lest, a promise being left us of entering into his rest, any of you should seem to come short of it. 2  For unto us was the gospel preached, as well as unto them: but the word preached did not profit them, not being mixed with faith in them that heard it. 3  For we which have believed do enter into rest, as he said, As I have sworn in my wrath if they shall enter into my rest: although the works were finished from the foundation of the world. 4  For he spake in a certain place of the seventh day on this wise, And God did rest the seventh day from all his works. 5  And in this place again, If they shall enter into my rest. 6  Seeing, therefore, it remaineth that some must enter therein, and they to whom it was first preached entered not in because of unbelief: 7  Again, he limiteth a certain day, saying in David, Today, after so long a time; as it is said, Today if ye will hear his voice, harden not your hearts. 8  For if Jesus had given them rest, then would he not afterward have spoken of another day. 9  There remaineth therefore a rest to the people of God. 10  For he that is entered into his rest, he also hath ceased from his works, as God did from his. 11  Let us labor therefore to enter into that rest, lest any man falls after the same example of unbelief.

What must we do to enter into His rest?  We all have to do this, we have to make some changes – spirit, soul, and body. I heard a great preacher years ago make this statement: “I found out walking with the Lord, that if there were going to be any changes made, it was going to be on my end because God never changes.”

This may sound strange, but we have to work at entering into His rest.  However, that work is to learn how to hear God and obey Him and walk in the Spirit.  I am going to furnish you with a short outline of how to make the needed changes that will eliminate stress and fear and depression which leads to that overwhelming feeling. 

First, we must remember we are a triune being, as we are a spirit, we have a soul and we live in a body. Here is a checklist of things to work on in each of these areas to enter into His rest. This is just making a total commitment to God and then following Him in obedience every day.

CHANGING THE SPIRITUAL MAN

We start by changing the spiritual man. This applies to men and women, but the Bible refers to our spirit as the spiritual man, so this includes women.  The Bible also speaks of men being a part of the Bride (a woman) of Christ.  In the spirit, there is neither male nor female.

Galatians 3:28  “There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither bond nor free, there is neither male nor female: for ye are all one in Christ Jesus.”

Here is a short outline to follow that should be done individually and corporately.

PRAYER:

We must first communicate daily with our Father by spending time in prayer, worship, and thanksgiving.

Talk to God throughout the day. Practice the presence of God as you go about your daily chores.

Spend time praying in tongues (also known as praying in the spirit) as this is an amazing gift because we are praying about our number one problem. Since God knows what that is, we are praying according to His will, as the Holy Spirit is guiding those prayers.

READING AND STUDYING THE BIBLE:

The Word of God is food to our spirit and will give us the strength we need and guidance for each day. APPLYING THE WORD OF GOD: If we apply the Word of God to all areas of our lives, we will overcome the devil’s plans against us.

 CHANGING OUR SOULS

The soul of every being is made up of the mind, the will, and the emotions. How do we allow the Holy Spirit to change our souls?

1) GUARD WHAT WE HEAR AND SEE AND SPEAK  

Limit the use of cell phones, TV, and the Internet.

Use phones for good purposes (like educational purposes), not idle chatter.

Feed the mind with good Christian or educational books and of course, the Bible.

Ask God what we need to watch.

Unsubscribe from lists and memberships that waste our time.

Time is running out and we need to focus on things that are good and helpful.

Cut down on entertainment.

Stay away from highly charged political rhetoric.

Stay away from all evil gossip.

Flee from pornography. Taking in filth in our minds will defile us. Ask God to deliver us, as the Bible says it is a shame to speak of those things done in darkness. 

Do not spread misinformation on the Internet that we have not checked the source for truth and validity. We are called to spread the gospel, not fake news or false information.

2) STRENGTHEN OUR WILL AND RESOLVE

Call on God to cleanse us of all that offends Him.

Ask Him to show us anything we have embraced that is not the truth.

Be willing to apologize to people when we discover we are wrong.

Humble ourselves to God.  

Ask the Lord to deliver us from all deception. Forgive all who have hurt us. God will give us the grace to do this.  

Ask God for the strength to do what is right and noble.

Do not stoop to the level of others who do not know God.

Do not criticize ministers. Pray for them. Find out from the Bible how to approach them when they are doing something that is not Biblical.

Take a humble attitude in all relationships.

Ask God for the strength to share our faith and lead others to Christ.

Set our will with His will.

Remain flexible so if He changes our schedule we will not be upset. He will make another time to finish the things we had planned. Follow His plans.

 3) CONTROL OUR EMOTIONS 

Yield to the Holy Spirit and allow Him to overcome all anger toward others.

Do not spend time ranting about all the injustices in the world. Ask God what you can do about them. Then do them. We can and should always pray about them. We are only responsible for the things God calls us to do. Each of us doing our part will take care of the whole.

Ask God to control what comes out of our mouths. Words are powerful and if spoken in haste and an unwise manner may be hard to reverse.

Do not allow the devil to make us cry every time someone says something degrading or harmful to us. Give it to God. 

Do not get into spats. There is a time for debate, but not when we are out of control.  

Ask God to control our emotions and refuse to allow anyone to cause us to be offended by them. We must not be offended by man or God. Give it to God. Agree to respectfully disagree with others and let God be the referee. 

CHANGING OUR BODIES

According to scripture, our bodies are the temple of the Holy Spirit and we need to take care of them and not defile this temple with things that are destructive to them. 

KEEP OUR BODIES FREE OF ALL ADDICTIONS

Ask God for His help in getting free from all addictions like drugs, alcohol, smoking, etc.

Trust Him to deliver you.

WORK AT EATING HEALTHY

Ask God to change your eating habits, as many people are suffering from diseases directly related to poor diet and indulgent eating.

Eating a diet of processed foods causes obesity.

Ask God to help you find the right diet for you if you need to lose weight.

Include drinking clean water and eliminating overly sweet beverages.

Include fasting and prayer.  

Study good nutrition and ask God to give you a taste of the clean and healthy organic foods He created.

Eat according to the Word of God. We have articles online about this and other things 

Eat wisely and in moderation.

Bless your food before eating and ask God to cleanse it and be thankful for it.

There are hungry people in the world. Pray for them.

KEEP OUR BODIES FIT AND CLEAN

We need to keep our bodies clean as this prevents disease when we do so.

God made a difference between the clean and the unclean in the Bible.

Christians are to be pure and clean in their bodies and their homes.

Living in filth is a sign that one needs deliverance from an unclean spirit.

This does not mean we will not face disorganization at times, but the disorder will not bother us until we can get to that area. He will help us to rise above it.

Overeating and oversleeping will bring a person to laziness.

Simple habits of bathing and washing our hands will help keep us healthy.

Ask God to strengthen you to develop a good work ethic, as well. Doing a good job brings a sense of satisfaction.

Stay active and fit. Be strong in the Lord and the power of His might.

Ask Him to heal you of any infirmities as He wants His people to have healthy bodies to serve Him on the earth.

HOW DO WE ENTER INTO GOD’S REST?

As we do these things, with the help of God, we will begin to feel stronger and better because we will have entered into His rest, so we can reach out and help others as there is a joy we receive from God when we help others.

TRUE PRIORITIES

Each day ask God to reveal to us our priorities, as to how to overcome this feeling of being overwhelmed.  Sometimes the feeling is merited because you have taken on more than He wants you to do. We must learn to say “no” to certain things as He knows what is truly important for that day. True priorities are things that must be done to avoid a penalty things that have a deadline and would keep us from accomplishing a certain thing, or things that if we fail to keep our word would make us become a liar. Now we all need to start cutting out the things that are harming us and our relationship with Him. Of course, we will need to take care of our daily responsibilities of living, but all the “add-ons” may be things we should not be doing.  (At least for a season.)  Do not allow the enemy to put guilt on you as you begin cutting back. There will be others to take on the jobs you were doing. Trust God to take care of those.

There is a silver lining to the Pandemic and that is that people were forced to stay home because of the lock-downs and this caused many people to realize how they had been neglecting their relationships with their family members and with Jesus.  God was and still is, at this time, trying to show us our priorities and they are not the priorities of the world. Many Christians realized they needed to change in this area once they slowed down and began to pray with their families.

Here is one last strategy for overcoming being overwhelmed.  We need to spend some time planning and organizing. We should make lists and write down our goals.  Then take steps, one at a time, to make the changes we need to make.  For instance, when planning your prayer time. Instead of declaring we are going to pray an hour a day, try 15 minutes and then you can increase the time as you move forward. Just do not skip your prayer time.  Some like to pray in the evenings to cover the next day, while others rise early to pray for that day. 

The Lord spoke to me years ago about this.  He said to me, “Steven P. Miller if you prayed about your problem as much as you talk about your problem, you would not even have that problem.”

Here is something that worked for me. I needed to deal with some things that had piled up.  I planned one little thing to do every day to reduce my backlog and one major project that needed completing. Since I was able to complete the small project, it gave me the inspiration to tackle the larger project.  Of course, I was unable at first to complete the larger ones in a day, but I made a start and broke it down in increments.  Soon I was able to complete them too.  Little by little, I soon began to make progress and then God sent others to help me speed up the process.  Sometimes we think God is so big (actually He is sizeless) that He does not care about the little things, but this is what the Bible says,  

Matthew 25:23 “His lord said unto him, Well done, good and faithful servant; thou hast been faithful over a few things, I will make thee ruler over many things: enter thou into the joy of thy lord.”

Many things we will be facing today will be unexpected so we must allow for the surprises of the day and get God’s help and direction for those things.  When we do have a slow day, make it count.  I am thinking of the adage, “Make hay while the sun shines.” We should do things ahead of time, so we are not faced with the pressure of a deadline. Satan is trying to “wear out the saints” right now, but the Lord will give us His strength to overcome all obstacles.  We must remember this time is only going to last for a season so we are just going through it.  The result is that the Lord is going to establish His Kingdom and we will be ruling and reigning with Him in it. We must learn how to do this with His grace and help.

Daniel 7:25-27 ‘And he shall speak great words against the highest, and shall wear out the saints of the highest, and think to change times and laws: and they shall be given into his hand until a time and times and the dividing of time. 26 But the judgment shall sit, and they shall take away his dominion, to consume and to destroy it unto the end. 27 And the kingdom and dominion, and the greatness of the kingdom under the whole heaven, shall be given to the people of the saints of the highest, whose kingdom is an everlasting kingdom, and all dominions shall serve and obey him.”

Now there will be times we are not able to keep up with things as we sometimes may face a time where we are thrown into “survival mode” because of an unforeseen life happening.  However, even in these kinds of events, as we call on the Lord He will be with us, giving us His supernatural peace and grace to get through them. 

As we believe Him and look to Him in faith, He will do a miracle to sustain and help us overcome the largest attacks of the devil.  Even what Satan means by evil can be turned into our good as we give our circumstances to God and trust Him for an answer.  Supernatural rest can be our portion in those times if we look to God and follow His leading.  The world will never understand how this can happen, but our Lord spoke these words to us in the Bible:

John 16:33 “These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.”

God knew we would be living in this hour where the culture is demanding and the people around us are on the fast track, but He does not want us to get caught up in a crazy world, but wants us to enter into His rest, which is doing His will and in doing that, the rest of the things that are not done yet, will not bother us.  Even amid great trials, we will not feel overwhelmed, because we have learned to walk in the spirit and be flexible in the Lord and flow in His timing. 

We must overcome pride and vanity to live this way.  We must not allow others to judge us or dictate to us how we live, what we do, and where we go. We must come out of the world and be separate and live in God’s world. This is called “walking in the spirit.”  We must be led by the Lord as to what He is wanting us to do and be committed to the will of God to enter into His rest.

Sometimes God does not change our circumstances right away, but He changes us so the circumstances do not bother or upset us.

1 John 2:16 “For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world.”

This is liberating and we simply do not need to make excuses for what is not done but concentrate on what He wants us to do and feel His rest in doing just that.  May we all, not only enter into His rest but stay in that place of flowing in His divine flow which is a place He describes thusly:

Matthew 11:29-30 “Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”

Hebrews 4:9-11 “There remaineth therefore a rest to the people of God. 10 For he that is entered into his rest, he also hath ceased from his works, as God did from his. 11 Let us labor therefore to enter into that rest, lest any man falls after the same example of unbelief.”

 PRAYER TO OVERCOME BEING OVERWHELMED

Steven P. Miller Founder of Gatekeeper-Watchman International Groups Dear Heavenly Father, I thank You that no matter what is going on around us, at this time, when we put our lives and circumstances in Your hands then we can trust You to show us the way to overcome everything we are facing. Lord, I do that right now.  Since I have made You Lord of my life, I can now trust You to bring order to the things that seem overwhelming to me.  Since I have now put You in control of things, then You are in control of every circumstance that the enemy wants to use to destroy me. I am declaring the devil is defeated in my life.  I am declaring that I have a sound mind and I will not fear anything that the devil thinks he will use to overcome me. Lord, you have an answer for every problem, because You live in me and Your eternal wisdom and power will show me the way to overcome these seemingly overwhelming things I face. Right now, I purposely pause, and ask You to empower me to enter into Your rest.  I give every problem to You and thank You that, day by day, I will be able to set my life and house in order and I trust You to bring it about. Thank you for healing me.  Thank you for getting me out of debt. Thank you for restoring my family. Thank you for using me in Your Kingdom to help others. I refuse to fret or worry about anything, but will now pray about everything from the small things to the large things.  Thank You that I walk in Your favor and that no matter what things I have done to create any of my messes in life, you have a way to lead me out of them into Your victory! Forgive me, Lord, and let my life be a testimony to Your overcoming power and Your love! Thank you that I can now enter into Your rest.  I ask this in the name of Jesus.  Amen.” From: Elder Steven P. Miller Saturday, April 15, 2023 @ParkermillerQ, Founder of Gatekeeper-Watchman International Groups Jacksonville, Florida., Duval County, USA. Instagram: steven_parker_miller_1956, Twitter: @GatekeeperWatchman1, @ParkermillerQ, https://twitter.com/StevenPMiller6 Tumblr: https://www.tumblr.com/blog/gatekeeperwatchman, https://www.tumblr.com/gatekeeper-watchman Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ElderStevenMiller https://www.facebook.com/StevenParkerMillerQ #GWIG, #GWIN, #GWINGO, #Ephraim1, #IAM, #Sparkermiller,#Eldermiller1981

[feedingtheflockministry]

It Does Not Matter How Old a Teaching is. What Matters is if it is True or Not

For as Paul and the other New Testament writers stated in their letters long ago, there were already false teachings among the believers of their day. There were also those that had left them because they were not actually one of them to begin with. A lot of time has passed between their letters and us now, and therefore the threat of falling prey to false teachings is much higher.

Many believers sit week after week in church services, or watching online videos, listening to false doctrines completely unaware of it. Even some of the most respected preachers out there that have preached for 50 plus years are preaching their opinions based on what they see in Christian culture, and not on what the Bible teaches.

I speak of doctrines like; cessationism, the prosperity gospel, progressive Christianity, the pre tribulation rapture, and once saved always saved. Many of these teachings go back for centuries, and others say thousands of years. However, these are just the tip of the iceberg.

I have even heard rumors of a popular church in Texas that uses tarot cards to attract new members of a younger generation. This practice is a form of witchcraft and sorcery. I have also seen a Lutheran church invite drag queens to put on a show to get them in the door. Therefore they invite sexual immorality into their church. But as Jesus once said, “what does it profit a person if they gain the whole world but lose their own soul?

We live in a generation where we idolize rock star preachers, and give church leaders titles and authority over us. For Jesus told us He is our teacher, and we are to call one another brothers not by other titles. Because of this we allow ourselves to become misinformed, and lead away from the whole truth of The Lord and the apostles of the New Testament. For we must diligently sit under the teachings of Jesus not relying on preachers to teach us. We must allow the Holy Spirit to remind us of everything The Lord spoke, and give us proper spiritual wisdom and understanding of what Jesus taught.

Many churches today demand a tithe of ten percent of your income based off of mosaic laws found in the Old Testament, but the New Testament says to give what you are lead to give. For it to be a joyous occasion not a burden under a law. The purpose for the tithe was so there would not be anyone in need among the people of God. It was never intended for pastors to get rich off of, or for the name of The Lord to be blasphemed because of wicked men in the pulpit. However this practice and teaching only continues to this day.

There are many pastors and teachers that write books and make videos in order to profit from them. They make the word of God into merchandise, and by doing so they pollute the message. When Jesus gave His disciples authority to heal and cast out demons He told them, “As you freely received, freely give.” That is a good sign you are baring good fruit for the Kingdom of Heaven if you freely give what He has given you.

There was a man named Simon who practiced magic in the book of Acts that came to believe in Christ. He wanted to receive the gift of the Holy Spirit in order that he may profit from the gifts of The Spirit. Peter severely rebuked him because he was asking with the wrong intentions. However despite such events we are told of, this practice continues to be commonplace for many popular pastors and Bible scholars out there. For all wisdom, knowledge, and understanding comes from the Holy Spirit. His words are not of His own, but are given through Him by The Lord. They are meant to be given freely and not profited from.

Once again do not think that these practices and teachings listed above are the only things to be aware of in churches and Christian culture today. Always seek from Him The Truth, and read your Bible yourself. Listen to it in audio form. Watch Bible movies that use the scripture as the script so you can experience it like you were there listening to The Lord or the apostles speak it. Spend your time in prayer, and hold fast to Him that is sanctifying you and is doing a good work in you.