#yeah so i hope you didnt find it entirely boring

[writing-all-over-the-place]

yeah, so I don't know how to title stories.

So here's kind of my "testing out the characters and their voices and how they interact with each other" kind of thing. I don't really know if it's related to the plot it's just writing for writing's sake. So um yeah it's a little long. And by that I mean there's not a lot of breaks in it. Also originally I wrote two different story things that aren't really related other than, like, characters. I didn't love the first one I wrote so I switched over so that's the one that you're seeing. I might incorporate themes from the first one later I just wasn't loving it. And I'm sorry about the whole writing voice thing I feel like I kinda suck at writing but I do it anyway because I think it's fun. So um yeah if you're wondering this is rooted in this post and uh feel free to go back to that. Now I'm tagging my lovely friends. @dysphoria-things @allnaturalgenderfluid @scarafrisbee @emreadsbooks17 @maia-isnt-real @bylerloveswaffles @webboygirl @queers-of-marybelltownship @moiistdirts @giant-clown and if i forgot to tag you just tell me. I literally have a list in my notes app that i have to keep track of this. So um anyways the story yeah I should get to that. Just warning you, line breaks aren't really my thing so sorry if that's like not how it should be or if you don't like that or something.

I actually love the phrase "fluffy socks and birkenstocks" because i feel like it's such a vibe so i roped that into this so yeah.

The thunder rumbles, but as I look out my window, it’s bright and cloudless. I turn back to my computer and continue working on my history essay. As much as I love history, I’ve been writing this essay for over a week, and I’m really just sick of it. I get up out of my chair and walk to the kitchen. I start boiling some water in the kettle. Right now, I’m really feeling that green tea vibe. Knock, knock, knock. I walk over to the door and open it.

“It’s your laundry in the washer, right? I really need to wash mine, and I’ve been waiting for you to show up. You also left your key over there; I’m not really sure how you got back to your apartment without it and that’s why I thought you’d be back soon but you didn’t come back and I switched your wet clothes to the dryer and I was about ready to take those out but then I thought I’d be a nice neighbor and come talk to you first and I feel really bad now because you were probably busy and just forgot because I do that all the time and I don’t want to come off as a mean person. I reached up and put my hand over his mouth.

“Shut up, would you?” He nods, and I take my hand away. “First off, I’ll take that,” I say, pointing to my key in his hand. “I have boiling water on the stove, so let me go turn that off, and then I’ll go get my laundry. He nods and opens his mouth to speak. I raise my eyebrows at him, and he closes his mouth slowly. I take a good look at him as I’m backing myself into the kitchen. He’s wearing green low-rise, probably off-brand, Converse, wrinkled jeans, and an earthy orange linen shirt. He’s got dark brown hair, round aviator sunglasses on top of his head, and really cute freckles. I look away because I’ve definitely been staring too long. I turn off my boiling water, and my heart sinks a little bit, knowing I have to wait much longer for my tea. “Did I leave my hamper over there?” He shakes his head. I do the fast little walk to get my hamper and then come back. He’s still standing there, looking at me the same way I was looking at him. I look down and make sure I’m not dressed horribly. I’ve got on my big oversized blue knit sweater and black slacks with my favorite fake snake-skin belt that has a gold belt. I’m wearing Birkenstocks and fluffy socks, but that’s fine because I feel like it would be weirder for me to change out of them.

“I’m Sammy.” He says this as I’m locking my apartment door.

“Oreo,” I reply. 

“Oreo…?” He raises an eyebrow. I shouldn’t be finding this complete stranger attractive, but I definitely am.

“Rory. My name is Rory. I go by Oreo. That’s what most people call me, except, like, the government.”

“Ah, gotcha.”

I think we’re going to have a nice walk in silence, but then he continues talking.

“Again, I’m really sorry about this. I promise I’m a nice human, and I’m not just being an asshole. Well, I guess I am. What I’m trying to say is that I don’t have a bad intention, but today is just one of those days that I need to get my laundry done because I’ve been procrastinating for a while and I’ve just been buying clothes the last couple days because I really didn’t want to do my laundry because I didn’t feel like human interaction, but then again, I probably got myself into more interactions between the bus rides and going to the store. And I know I shouldn’t be scared of my neighbors; I’m sure they’re all really nice people, you included, of course.” He pauses there. “So…Oreo.” He says it again. “Oreo.” I look at him sideways. “It’s a cool name! I like the way it says it. Sorry, uh, brain fart. It feels nice in my mouth. No, that’s weird.”

“I get what you mean, Sammy. But uh, I want to get back to my green tea making, so I’m just going to get my laundry and walk back to my apartment in my fluffy socks and Birkenstocks, and I will see you again, eventually.”

“Right, right. Sorry. Sorry. I, uh. I’ll see you later, I guess.” He turns and leaves, but I call after him. “Are you gonna get your laundry?”

“Right, right. Yes. Sorry. Sorry.”

“Stop apologizing. You’re fine. I think it’s funny.”

[13eyond13]

.

[n0ct0urn1quet]

every single time i think about me and my gf i remember we've fr been together for 4 years and at face value sure it doesnt seem like long but then im just like. oh my god 4 years is a long fuckin time!!!!!1 i was 12 4 years ago!!!!!!!!! i was an entirely different person 4 years ago!!!!! god dam!!!!!!!! its just so wild to think about. in a good way ofc !!!!! its just. wow.

here i was like 3 years ago wondering if me and pepper would ever b able to meet in person n here we are current day still trying to work Something Out to meet. we have our entire thing planned out already basically too : when she moves out she's gonna go find a place n live alone for abt a month or so n then when she's ready im gona come n move with her, i know that im gonna b coming to see Her and she isnt comin up here to see me n its like. we're plannign that. 3 years ago i made a dinky little gofundme with no credit card no paypalll no Anything set up to it expecting that ppl would donate to it so that me, a 13 year old, by myself, could go see my gf allllllllll the way in texas . like we fr did not plan anything out like. at the time her house was super super Super Small n her room was tiny n she didnt have the best living situation and hell i had only known her for like a YEAR and the ppl she was living with prbably didnt know who i was at ALL so its just. idk.

but liek!!!!!!! here we are now . planning 2 meet each other . Some Time. eventually idk when. im sitting here hoping that idk i can come see her during winter break in december but i feel like thats too soon to start planning for and its a limited amount of time bc she only gets 2 weeks off of school in december n our winter breaks dont match up bc she starts winter break like a week before we do ??? but again that doesnt really matter bc im prolly not gonna be in school this year ANWYAYS. i really really hope we can do something but ouguughhh i dont know her mom n her mom doesnt know me and my mom wouldnt wanna come with us bc she has 0 interest in meeting my gf (i mean not like in a negative way she just never sounds interested when i talk to her abt pepper. like she just sits there and goes "uh huh" "mhm" "yeah" like ... i dont expect her to say anything fuckin groundbreaking but you could at least not sound bored when im talking to you about my gf of 4 years !!!!!! fuck!!!!!!!!). idk!!!!!!!! i just really wana do something. plan something. id LOVE for her to come here bc not only do i not get to leave the house and go on an airplane (airplane scary :() but ,,,,,,,,, peppor gets 2 meet,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, my kitty,,,,,,,,,, but also thas anothr thing bc originally it was suppsoed to be me AND mom going to go visit them but then we wouldnt have anyone to watch kitty and. i jst dont wanna leav ehim home alone for 2 weeks straight thatd just be HORRIBLE. he has abandonment issues already from being abandoned by my sister and suddenly being seperated from kitten, my sister's other cat, who he's known since kitten was a kitten. its just like... i dont want him to think that WE'RE going to abandon him too yknow. so rly id much rather have pepper come Here so that me n mom can be home n watch kitty n pepper can meet kitty and yeah !!!!!!!!!!!! yeah.

idk sorey for the random post!!!!!!1 im just awuauhjhbjkdnkjnklg. its so wild 2 think that me n her have been together for 4 years . like god thas a long time and honestly. i think its so ebic :] som of my most happy memories wer shared with her or came from something her n i did together and its just. its nice :]

i reemeember. singing 2 her for the first time. n i remember my voice was all Shaky bc god i was just so fuckin NERVOUS bc i think not only had that been the first time she heard me sing but ALSO i think if i remember correctly that was like one of the first times we really talked verbally?? i dont rly think we did often before that. n i remember finishing the song n she was like omg u sound so pretty and i was like aaaaa!!!!!!!!! n then she was like "yeah i muted the bot (cause we were in a discord call with a music bot in the vc so she could hear the song) so i could hear u better" AND I WAS JUST LIKE AUAUHGHGHHG WHYYY HAVING THE SONG IN THE BACKGROUND WOULDVE MADE MY VOICE SOUND 10x MORE LISTENABLE!!!!!! WHY DID YOU DO TAHT!!!!!! FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!! HSDKJHKJHJKD,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

also man i remember jus like the . the Evolution of her voice. like cause yknow when we started talking verbally we were still jus young n i remember her voice being. like not super deep at all. not like high pitched but she sounded just. much different than how she does now. n i think like we didnt rly vc for a while (like idk a couple months or so . maybe longer?) and. god i rjust remember hearing her voice for the first time n it dropped liek 3 octaves and i was just like oh my GOD JHAJAKSKJBHJKGBKJG... n even stil 2 this day whenver i hear her voice im juts like ouuuuughghgh,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,prety :]

(meanwhile i still sound the same as i did when i wasl ike 10 years old . juts slightly, VERY slightly deeper. barely noticeable though AJKJSAHJBKJLG)

n idk juts!!!!!! idk. i juts love her a lot. shit's complicated sometimes bc distance n school n general business sometimes but its cool . i dont mind waiting another however long we'll have to wait til we meet in person. who knows, it could be a mere couple of months to at the VERY least, like, 2 mor years. which isnt that bad honestly !!!!!!! like cmon. we've been together 4 years. all long distance. i have no doubt that we can go through another 2 ish years but.....if we're lucky maybe itll only b a couple months. we'll just have to see how things work out :]

@510snake i luv u,,, <:]

[lunatic-fandom-space]

Oh god so, since ive been watching and reading black butler a lot again Ive obviously also been thinking a lot abt it and it made me unlock this memory qnd have this kinda harrowing realization

For context, I was pretty active on Wattpad at the time, specifically the german side, specifically the german minecraft youtuber side, although I was slowly getting into fully fictional ships at that point as well. One day, one of the people I followed made this "book" or whatever that was like, a roleplay ? Idk the way it worked was that you would 'apply' by just making your character under the comments of one chapter and then go to the comment section of the next chapter where the creator had a comment that was like "RP starts here" and then you replied to that and thats where the rp took place. There wasnt really any direction to this whole thing lmao it was called like "Wattpadtown" or smth and the "premise" was literally just "a bunch of people who got some weird bullshit goin on hanging out in this wacky town" and the entire roleplay was basicalld just one extended shitpost, I really wish I could find it and read through some of it because it was WILD

We ended up being like 8 "main" people in this roleplay (rip to all the other people who applied lmao there were a lot surprisingly enough) and I actually became somewhat close friends w/ the person who started it although we never took it out of the wattpad comments section, at me most we would pm eachother so we've unfortunately lost contact lol. One thing to note about all 8 of us was that we were all pretty big billdip shippers. This is important bc the reason I got into Black Butler because of billdip basically lmao

Like, idk if these were that popular in other fandoms, but there were a lot of these Ask or Dare book for Billdip were you would ask your favorite characters/ships questions or tell them dares or whatever and then someone would write the weirdest most poorly written bullshit around it and its really funny I hope they still make those. But yknow, just having two guys interact in your ask or dare book is kinda boring so you'd get a lot of crossovers with other pairings, popular ones were like Willdip, Mawill, Tomco I remember a german one that had the bluehaired guy x the redhaired guy from Assassination Classroom that was fun. And obviously they would do Sebaciel, like, those two ships are soooooooo in the same ballpark its insane. Anyway, so Im reading this one ask or dare book, mostly for the billdip stuff but Sebastian n Ciel are also there and in one of the chapters they get this dare: "everyone, watch the corset scene from the anime" I remember this very vividly. These ask or dare books could get very meta btw. So they do that ig, and we get their reactions idk how Bill n Dipper reacted but Ciel is all flustered and Sebastian is all flirty or whatever bc the characterization in these books is the bane of my existence. Whatever, the important part is, Im kind of intrigued now bc I was coming out of that in that phase where anything gay seemed like, Scandalous and Exciting(tm) because I was starting to get used to it by that point bc I read a lot of gay fanfic HOWEVER media that had like, canon gay shit in it still seemed Scandolous and Exciting(tm) because yknow, i didnt know a lot of that and its also just different consuming fan content vs Actual Media(tm) yknow. So I watched it and I enjoyed it and I got to The Corset Scene and.. I was not disappointed thats for sure

So thats my story, lets get back to the roleplay stuff. Me and those 8 people would often talk (still in the wattpad comment section) about like, other stuff and one evening the creator wrote like "Heyy can anyone recommend an anime to me, I just binged attack on titan again but now Im sad again because my fave Marco died and like, yeah I have this theory that hes still alive as a titan but still :'( need something to cheer me up" idk why I remember this so vividly now because Ive only watched a single episode of aot so this is borderline incomprehensible to me to this day but whatever. I know she liked billdip and since I liked billdip and then I watched black butler and really liked it I jumped on the chance to tell her to watch it. ALSO I knew that she looooved pretty anime guys and Sebastian is a very pretty and very anime guy so I knew she would adore it. So then she tells me that shes gonna go find and watch it and Im like "YESSSSSSS pls tell me what you think"

Less than 10 minutes later she writes me back like "okayyyyy Im loving it so far (and Sebastian is reaaaallly cute xD) I just have one question tho: why do they have british accents" and I didnt really think anything of it I was just kinda like "Yeah it takes place in 19th century england ig" but I just came to a weirdly upsetting realization; she was definitely not watching it in japanese but also, they dont do accents in the german dub which means......... Ciel and Sebastian have british accents in the english dub.

[lostacelonnie]

Thats entirely fair i don't think anyone trusts tumblr to work correctly tbh. Ive just been feeling the seasonal blues a bit. Ah heck why do teachers always do that instead of letting up on the workload. I do have a bit of chill time coming up thankfully which will be great because i need rest & to holiday shop. Oh heck i cant imagine that like. Americans are a mixed bag of overly friendly & minders of their own business but a place where its all overly friendly would be a culture shock to me. That feels like the universal experience with talking to native spanish speakers just. Yeah we can guess kinda what's bein said through context & gesticulating. Finding a few recipes you can do & rolling from there is just how it goes i imagine. But ive been cooking for many years so i had to branch out to keep some variety otherwise meals would be boring. I have wireless earbuds but only because like. People talk to me often when im not expecting it & it bothers me a lil because the mental illnesses so its easier to listen to stuff & use that as my reason for not hearing them. Australia truly is the land of wild shit. Its got that category on lock. Wow thats like. Complete spectrum opposite teachers? Almost? Maybe? Though how does a math teacher not know counting was she just tired one day or is that common? Thats entirely fair i don't think anyone trusts tumblr to work correctly tbh. Ive just been feeling the seasonal blues a bit. Ah heck why do teachers always do that instead of letting up on the workload. I do have a bit of chill time coming up thankfully which will be great because i need rest & to holiday shop. Oh heck i cant imagine that like. Americans are a mixed bag of overly friendly & minders of their own business but a place where its all overly friendly would be a culture shock to me. That feels like the universal experience with talking to native spanish speakers just. Yeah we can guess kinda what's bein said through context & gesticulating. Finding a few recipes you can do & rolling from there is just how it goes i imagine. But ive been cooking for many years so i had to branch out to keep some variety otherwise meals would be boring. I have wireless earbuds but only because like. People talk to me often when im not expecting it & it bothers me a lil because the mental illnesses so its easier to listen to stuff & use that as my reason for not hearing them. Australia truly is the land of wild shit. Its got that category on lock. Wow thats like. Opposite spectrum of teachers maybe? Though how does she not know counting was she just tired one day? Noted for sure ill pay closer attention to the honkai meta. Yknow i hope what a herscherr is gets explained because i still dont know. Oh thats cool to know i will make a note of that polish phrase to try & remember linguistics can be fun. Ah yeah for sure they actually put effort into like. Making neuvillette have a story & be interesting & it shows. Only genshin male i care for probably. Oh hey stigmatism gang. Im farsighted with a stigmatism also so same hat. I always forget about talents & weapon leveling but it works out its all good. A 7 am as well jeesh are you good? This arc is very good & i cant wait to see where it goes wataoshi owns my attention now. Oh yeah i saw you mention noita how is it? Damn. Thats a lot of lore shoutout to himeko the mvp. Love her. What exactly is a honkai anyways are they like. The antimatter legion from star rail. Or well are the legion like the honkai beasts? Also do you have any seele lore? Also also glad you saw the polish post i had hope you would

this website will forever be scuffed JSJDSKDJF. and dont worry me too. its Getting Bad Again but soon its gonna be the winter solstice and i always start feeling better when the days get longer again. and god yeah fr...... we literally have so many grades already CAN THEY CHILL. luckily i got sick again so i didnt have to go to school today and im guessing im not gonna have many lessons to catch up on since its our last Proper day before the holidays and we have pretty easy subjects on wednesday so. we chillen. yeah same thank GOD for the holidays. tho im gonna have to deal with my family for like an entire week which. auuugh. dont wanna. but oh well ill get through it Somehow. AND GOD YEAH with being polish is much more noticable bc ppl here just really will avoid any unnecessary interaction with strangers [which is perfectly fine by me i like not being bothered]. but yeah the gesticulation Does help a lot in communicating. at the end of the day, as long as the message gets conveyed, it doesnt really matter How that was accomplished. i usually order takeout to my school since we have a program like that so i dont really have to cook that much, but yeah i should also probably branch out SJDKGK i dont know howw much longer i can survive on scrambled eggs every time i cant eat at school. yeah fair, i use my headphones to avoid conversations as well, tho luckily i have friends that are generally chill about the fact i will just. Not talk sometimes so i dont even have to do that a lot. and yeah we actually joke about how exactly opposite they are JSKFJG and its. a common occurence. but then again my school is just Not that great so nobody is surprised. good luck with the meta!!! its hellish at first but gets a bit easier with every built valkyrie so just trust the process. AH IM SORRY i unfortunately have a bad habit of using honkai specific terms as if theyre common knowledge. my bad. but essentially, the honkai itself is like. a force, i guess is the best word? that, despite being non-sentient, has one goal: destroying humanity. it grows along with human progress. the antimatter legion is not a bad comparison, actually! and a herrscher is a person thats been, in a way, possessed by the honkai to obtain incredible amounts of power to try and carry out the honkais objective of destruction. herrschers have different. specialties, you could say? some of them are more obvious [like the herrscher or wind, thunder, fire, ice etc] and some are more abstract [the herrscher of the void, origin, domination, for example]. in the current era, with enough willpower and self control, those powers can be used by a herrscher without them losing their humanity. it gets a bit more complicated than that but thats the basic rundown. ANYWAY COMING BACK linguistics will always be fascinating to me....... especially etymology. i love etymology. AND YEAH SAME i thought the day would never come in which i would care about a genshin guy and yet. also hey were matching......... i used to also always forget to level up talents but since traces are a bit more accentuated in the star rail tut it kinda carried over to genshin for me i guess. 7 am classes have caused me to go through all stages of grief but, just like those, i have reached Acceptance. at least theres less people on the bus so i can sit down. AND YEAH YEAH YEAH THE LOVE SCALE ARC HAS ALWAYS BEEN MY FAVORITE....... i love manaria. terrible wingwoman. very charming and handsome. and about noita yes ive been playing it. a Lot recently. roguelikes are fun theyre surprisingly making me More patient than i was instead of destroying my psyche like everyone said they would. and since noita is a finnish game im genuinely having a lot of fun learning the pronunciation of a lot of the enemy names. HIMEKO REALLY IS THE MVP FOREVER AND ALWAYS. I LOVE HER. i do in fact have seele lore and as previously i shall put it under the cut!! and im actually designed to sense and reblog all polish posts o7

as with himeko, i wouldnt consider myself an Expert on seele lore [if you have any further questions and/or want a more in-depth analysis of her, i would redirect you to tumblr user crowties] BUT i do know it. decently well. it goes without saying that this is also gonna contain massive spoilers.

so, seele's [as well as bronya's!] backstory is mainly showcased in the azure waters manga [although, do be warned that it features themes such as: physical and psychological abuse, child soldiers, pedophilia, and [minor on minor] attempted sa]. but moving on from all that.

seele grew up in cocolia's orphanage, in siberia, where she also met bronya after she was picked up by cocolia. she was also born with a certain condition, being a natural stigma [stigmata in the honkaiverse are manifestations of honkai energy which people are very rarely born with, but schicksal for example uses artificial ones to boost valkyries' combat capabilities]. that very stigma belonged to the herrscher of death in the previous era and is fully sentient! im gonna call her veliona so that its harder to mix them up but do know that theyre both referred to as seele in the game [and its actually a pretty important part of their identity that theyre both seele]. now the thing about seele and veliona is that you think theyre gonna be a terrible did stereotype and then theyre. Not. as in veli, at first, does act like "the evil alter" but shes actually just pretty mean but wants to protect seele. since seele is just. Very fragile due to being, you know, a timid 12 y/o.

in the orphanage, another one of the kids was sin mal! she exists solely to be a terrible person but i heard that wasnt the case in guns girl z so i defend her anyway. sin was jealous over the fact that bronya and seele became so close despite seele being weak, so she PUSHED BRONYA DOWN THE FUCKING STAIRS AND BROKE HER LEGS???? shes that kind of person i guess. seele actually saw it happen but she was too scared to do anything. which, understandable! sin is extremely volatile.

seele then gets Kidnapped by child sex traffickers but bronya singlehandedly finds her and murders everyone responsible. seele is pretty horrified because 1. bronya [also 12] just killed a bunch of people in front of her and 2. she saw a manifestation of veliona that made her feel Happy that this is happening. veli is not very good at communication and also genuinely considers herself a terrible person at that point in time so that doesnt help with the evil alter allegations but oh well.

then. cocolia, at the request of anti entropy [allegedly?] starts carrying out child experiments, meant to make people achieve 100% honkai resistance. the people selected are bronya and sin, but seele volunteers in bronyas place since theyre pretty dangerous. right before that, however, sin attempts to assault seele, which veliona does Not let slide, so she rips out sins tooth and then traps her consciousness in an illusion in which she pushes her down the stairs and then slices off her fingers. good riddance.

however, the x-10 experiment Fails and seele falls into the sea of quanta, going missing. tho right as its about to happen, veliona actually uses a lot of her power to let seele see the sea, because she made a promise with bronya that they would go together someday. right as shes about to reach bronya, her power runs out and they completely disappear into the sea.

when bronya finds out about about this, she wants to take the x-10 test herself to try and find seele. cocolia doesnt want to let her go so that SHE DOESNT LOSE MORE CHILDREN, but bronya shows that shes gonna kill herself if cocolia doesnt agree and so she goes. during her test, she. actually manages to reconnect with seele for a while! they kiss and make a promise that theyll see each other again. however, due to bronyas legs still not being fully healed, she actually gets pretty badly hurt [with her legs needing prosthetics, as well as damage to her emotive circuits] during the test and is forcefully disconnected. seele manages to manifest bronya a robot project bunny. somehow. it helps her move and is also a giant cannon.

after this, seele and veliona float in the sea of quanta for 4 years. they grow quite close to each other during this, tho still maintain some distance because veli is just. not very sociable. veliona also makes a deal with an entity called the serpent [which i believe was confirmed to be kevin? but dont quote me on that] because he promises that hell get them out of the sea if they help him escape as well. veli is fully aware hes taking advantage of her but she has to try everything. when bronya jumps into the soq during the herrscher of reason arc, she manages to find seele! at first, velis deal with the serpent forces her to fight bronya, but during cyberangel seele and bronya end up working together. seele is also the one who makes bronya survive contact with the core of reason. as theyre escaping from the sea, bronya almost gets left behind, so seele and veliona achieve full unity during dual ego [IM INSANE ABOUT THEM. I AM INSANE] and they leave the sea.

after that, seele is admittedly Not that present in the main story [tho she does appear a couple of times!] until the moon arc and later the salt snow holy city arc, which is also the best part of the game because i said so and i am always right. SERIOUSLY THO SALT SNOW ARC IS MY FAVORITE IT IS SO GOOD IT IS SO-

anyway. seele and veliona are the protagonists in this one! i would so happily tell you the story but im also unfortunately too tired to give a detailed description of THE ENTIRE ARC so ill keep things short. when dispatched for a mission in nagazora, seele [and susannah! susannah is in this arc. i love her] gets dragged into a bubble universe by misteln [who, due to some events in the moon arc, veliona has extreme beef with]. but its actually a pretty bad thing because, due to the unique structure of the universe [that being, its actually two universes overlapping, one acting as the normal world and the other as the afterlife], seele and veli get separated. this causes significant mental distress to both of them. however, eventually they manage to reconnect! which also accidentally makes them the sage of the universe [a special role, usually reserved for one person] since they fulfill the criteria of being able to traverse between life and death. the problem is, theres..... already a sage....... and the universe starts collapsing. after a fight, the previous sage gives up her powers and seele gets sealed in her tower to act her role. it turns out that her becoming the sage wasnt what actually triggered the collapse, and so the team [consisting of seele, veli, susannah, kira, niggurath, senti, misteln, prometheus, vita, and schrodinger] works together to try and prevent it in another way. a Bunch Of Shit happens which i love very deeply but would also take way too long to explain, and seele gets separated from veliona, eventually becoming the herrscher of death [but, vita decides that seele is a far too gentle person to be called that, and so she becomes the herrscher of rebirth]. they manage to save the universes, and also free vita from being a pawn to sa, the force destroying the universe. they get to return home after that :)

i am extremely normal about seele and veliona [they give me mental illness]

[treesinspace]

Trying to catch up with Doctor Who before the 60th so I just finished the six Flux episodes!

I have some thoughts & some questions

What did the Grand Serpent actually DO? What did he contribute to the plot? I heard so much about him beforehand and he is pretty cool, but like... He didnt do anything? Vinder could've been working for any corrupt organization, it wouldnt have changed anything. His manipulations of UNIT didnt amount to anything except for callbacks. When he finally met the main gang he was basically just a part of the Sontaran faction. I just find it really weird how inconsequential he was to the plot?

The plot in general I found quite convoluted actually, so maybe I missed something. But of course convoluted plots are a time-honoured tradition.

The Lupari species bond thing makes no sense at all, but I dont actually mind it. It's a joke, you arent supposed to think about it all that much. But if you were to think about it, you might wonder how this species bond came to pass and why only one species knows about it and what the Lupari get out of it and how they keep track of every human. And also. You'd REALLY think this wouldve come up earlier, the amount of times the earth has almost been destroyed.

Anyway,

I really liked Dr Eustace Jericho, he was great. Also, the Mad Mole. I wonder if he has any relation to Robert Smirke from TMA?

Loved the return of "Contact", always nice to see

And yeah, I still dont like the Timeless Child prophecy. But even aside from that, weren't Azure and Swarm profoundly boring villains? Or is that just me?

Also, I resent the Division kinda taking away the role of my beloved Celestial Intervention Agency (derogatory). Dont overwrite my evil organization with a different evil organization! And yeah, obv the Division's motivations for destroying the entire goddamn universe were utterly nonsensical, but I hold out hope that this might be adressed later.

Im always happy to see Kate, but much like the Great Serpent, she didnt get to do much. Still, her and the Great Serpent's plot was really enjoyable. I generally dont like "this will destroy the whole universe!" plots, when the stakes are that high it renders them basically meaningless.

Wait, ACTUALLY, didnt the Flux like. Destroy MOST of the universe? I was sure they would turn that back, Swarm even said he can do that so i assumed the Doctor would trick him into doing that. But that never happened? Does that mean the universe is just much much smaller now, in canon? Wtf

I wonder if I'm just kinda not into Doctor Who anymore or if it really got less good lmao

Who can say?

I'm curious about the Specials, i have no idea why David Tennant seems to be back in Dr Who gifsets now

[richardsphere]

Rwby Catchup V8E4 (last one for the day probably)

Back into the prison. Qrow’s going full batman-level brooding. (but then, if I had a cursed soul i would too) Looks like they might be setting both Harriet and Wolfboy (do i know his name? I feel i probably should by now) up for “benevolent treason”. I hope so, they are the least boring members of the Ops. Chasescene, Grapplinghook the leg of the monster that has previously shown the ability to liquidise its own body at will. it definitly wont just shapeshift its leg out of constriction. High Fives! And Jaune instantly regrets it Aura is strangely inconsistent isnt it? There are episodes where Jaune, noted haver of an alledgedly above-average amount goes down in 1 hit, and then theres this scene where Ren leaves no surface un-facesmashed without ever feeling anything. Shield-enade turns into a ramp. (thats cool, did i mention how i like the creativity in their kits yet? I think i spend too much time criticising the often terribly flawed story but its moments like these that remind me why i stick around) And we lost Oscar. I thought Weiss had manners, but seeing as her first instinct on greeting her brother is to point a deadly weapon at his neck i seem to be mistaken. Maybe your brother would like you more if you didnt do that. I think that might’ve genuinely been Whitleys way of asking “how can I help”, and if it is that way. Man is Weiss being a bitch here telling him to “go to his room”. Like you do not live here and havent for years and his life is falling apart around the boy. JYR are stuck in the tundra without phones. (which brings me on a tangent, are their phones connected to the local Transit Tower in atlas? the one controlled by Ironwood? This seems like a gross oversight of our Dear Dictator.) Oh are they trying to play Ren’s single-minded obsession at the cost of politeness as an Ironwood Parrallel? not really working for me but i can respect the attempt. Ren is right that they werent ready, but then no one is ready for the apocalypse. and also Is Ren still on this “blind faith in authorities” thing? I thought we got over that with Ozpin, i get that you acknowledge that Team Goodguy doesnt know what its doing but newsflash No one in this universe has ever known what they were doing, Even the gods were only fucking around to see what they would find out with their MagiScienceproject.  Oscar wakes up, ozpin assures him everything will be fine. (the most recent in his ever-going string of increasingly unbelievable deceptions.) Salem used Torturebeam its visually stunning, but not verry effective. Cinder stepping closer and closer to her eventual betrayal, “without you I am nothing”. Now that is the second time we have heard her say that. Probably implies she may be about to get an actual backstory. If only the show had planted these seeds earlier i might even be bothered to care. Cinder doenst think Salem knows Team Goodguy is going to go after the satelite. Cinder is an idiot. Salem has admitted that the entire atlas arc is about setting the stage for her final act. Salem probably wants the satelite up in space because it leads to Operation 100 kuroyuri’s at once as established in V7E2. Neo is going to exit the story for a bit and emerald is taking the stage again instead.  “yeah ruby” followed by a tiny moment of jaune looking around, not confused but as if he’s putting dots together. This is the scene where the “years waiting for this” start.

[anakinskywalkerog]

(that way by tate mcrae the queen 🙏)

so its a bit weird because hes still got a bit of that staring thing going on? not like before, but i can feel it. the rush of oxytocin i get when i know i wont look back is just 👌👌👌

and im friends with some of his friends and i talk with them... although he dodges conversation with me, hes always there and involved when im around, like, hes watching when im talking/arguing/bantering with his friends and his head turns to me when im answering questions or when someone says my name? like bruh MAKE UP YOUR MIND

and stay fucking loyal to your gf :/

would you believe it if i told you that he told his GIRLFRIEND that i told him i didnt like him?! and his gf is BEST friends with the bitchy friend of mine who told him i liked him last year, and i told him: "those rumours arent true, its because of bad blood with a friend" and he misinterpreted that to be: "bad blood in the (my) friendship group" and my friends got affronted because obviously that looks bad, right?

WTF i was so fkn annoyed at him; you know i dont like you, drop it. dont take it back to your gf, and dont read too much in between the lines.

why do you think he would do that?

and even before that i saw a friend (not v close at all, just like an acquaintance) walk up to him - "hey complicated sad machete boi, guess what? sythe-" i was in a rush so i didnt eavesdrop, but i HEARD her say my name! im sure. and the next day she comes up to me and asks: "so, do you like anyone? really? you dont? because i heard you liked complicated sad machete boi..." BRUH!

and she said HE told her? now, i dont entirely believe that, it could be true, especially if she brought up the convo (i think he told a few of his friends, but not in a dick-y a way, more like "dude, what do you think of this? do you think she likes me?" and they deffo asked who it was. because, well. and also im not exactly the person youd automatically assume would like someone, especially him, so yeah.) i get how it looked, but i hope he realizes it looked the exact same way to me as well 👍

im curious, because i have a very unique name, and its not easily misheard - was she going to tell him she heard i liked him (this is entirely possible, i was not as careful as i should have been, but the three of us are only in one class together; shes not in the other classes i have with him so theres no way she picked up on it by herself. also because in that class i dont look at him, like, ever. its the way that class is.) or ask him if he liked me???

there's so much going on here, i wish i was telepathic and could read minds so i coud just find the truth - i wouldnt care if i replused him, atleast i know THAT for sure, am i right?

but its annoying that hes so indecided. like, its okay if you dont want me or anything, people dont always like each other back. its the way the world works. but dont try to have it both ways; youre trying to date your gf and keep whatever fucking tension is going on between us at the same time! (ngl it put the song "break up with your girlfriend, im bored" make a lot of sense 😂 melanie martinez vibes 👍)

a friend said "maybe he just likes you but doesnt want to admit it" which actually makes a lot of sense, especially seeing as that he has a GIRLFRIEND? bruh.

i tried to soften the blow for him because i posted a story on my snapstory telling a fictional friend i didnt like anyone at all, and he saw that, so he could tell it was coming - im not at fault here!

there was actually a fight going on yesterday (b/w two random girls from our school) and everyone posted those videos (of the fight) to their stories as well - im certain atleast one of his friends had it on, (although we have quite few commons and none of them did, so maybe they didnt) (but he has a different set of friends and hes deffo on someone's priv story where they may have posted it, im the new girl and hes not) but he asked ME?

that felt great 💅 but not because of him 🤣 it was just funny to be the one holding the cards for once!

two friends told me to drop him because he got a buzz cut 😭😂 but it isnt a full on buzz cut but like one those buzz cuts with the sides shaved and the top... grown...? like, you dont shave the top RIP 💀

i have no idea where this is going, but we're definitely going to be still seeing him :/ not in my love life, probably, but in my drama life 🤣

FUCK- ive ranted quite a lot, sos about that 😭

pls dont block me oli 🥺

lol rant away Sythe

i don’t know i don’t think it’s that weird for him to tell his girlfriend about your convo with him…like in most relationships it might be weirder for him not to tell her? bc in the better/healthier relationships you tell your partner most things

it’s possible that maybe he just thinks you’re attractive? maybe he’s looking at you bc he thinks you’re pretty. teenage boy brains make no sense to me and never will, but you gotta remember that if he wanted to date you, he would probably do something to make it happen. but rn it sounds like, even if he does like looking at you, he still wants to be with his gf….so again. idk like tension/feelies with someone can be FUN but also, maybe find a new crush who is single lol (easier said than done)

[trans-girl-sora]

So now that I'm awake and coherent, I have Thoughts. I will need to rewatch it soon, so take it with a grain of salt, and obviously spoilers for Dark Road

Did I like it? Yeah I guess so lmao, like... it gave some resolution for Luxu and Player (thank god, I hated Xeha-Player so much), and the Baldr story was VERY good especially in the back half after the Big Reveal.

That reveal made me retroactively like the rest of the story because up until then it just felt really.. hollow? I didnt really understand that it was a MYSTERY mystery, like a true Whodunnit, though i guess i did kinda breeze through it thanks to Everglow's cutscenes (god bless Everglow)

The dialogue was good! "Walking like a carpet" was VERY funny and all the dialogue with MoM was very good and interesting (no name reveal though. SIGH.) I think the dialogue being interesting is kind of the problem I had with Dark Road, though.

The throughlines throughout the game were "dichotomies are BAD. order vs chaos, dark vs light, power vs weakness - if you lean too heavily into any it corrupts and destroys you" even going so far as to bring the concept of false light into play to explain why Eraqus was a bad shitty dad. But then it never.. really delivered? It just said them in passing, never followed up, and moved onto The Actual Story, Baldr.

The Baldr reveal made it all click that this was the Baldr show, like, it was all about him and Hoder the entire time. Which was honestly a good move!! Baldr is a good character with solid motivations and scary intent. Our main character, however, Xehanort, was just.. sort of a prop in the background for everyone else. He's very passive, he goes with whatever anyone (mostly Eraqus) says unless he's making bad decisions to get stronger like a typical shonen protag. It's just like... Xehanort was the weakest part of the Xehanort game

I guess when I went into it I was expecting to find a good motivation, some secret hidden from us, a clue in his past as to why older Xehanort is so... fucking boring and confusing. We never really got that. I kept watching and being like "alright, soon they're gonna show why this funny young Xehanort loses his heart or something and doesn't become older boring Xehanort" and he just didn't. It was a really sad conclusion to Xeha's story. I kept expecting SOMETHING to happen, SOMETHING to make me care, I was trying SO DESPERATELY but just..... nothing.

And I dunno, I should really stop getting my hopes up for KH games to have compelling character arcs and narratives because that died with KH2 but like... for a game about the main antagonist of the last 10 games, you'd think it would explain anything or make anything more clear or interesting, and it really didn't.

Worth watching for Baldr though, will watch again

[beesmygod]

very very specific call for information: anyone out there deal with out-toeing caused by external tibial rotation (duck feet from a fucked up tibia) AS AN ADULT?

im putting this out here because 1. theres like no fucking information on the entire internet about adults who never grew out of a common childhood problem (unlike children, who self-correct by strengthening muscles, my tibia is an inherited condition. mom has it but not nearly as bad) and 2. i just want to know more! especially what im looking at for recovery.

e: im me from the future. this post is so long and boring and navel gazey so i added images in the hopes it might trick you into wanting to share it.

i only just started this process yesterday: after a series of free association google searches stemming from the fear that i had developed peripheral artery disease at age 31, i discovered symptoms i had been attributing to other random issues (pain radiating down leg? i must be bloated and pressing down on a nerve. pain in shins when i walk even for a short while or up a single flight of stairs? i must be out of shape and destroying my body. knees swollen with fluid in the 4th grade? bursitis, etc) could pretty much all be traced back to my fucked up leg.

my right leg (/my/ right) is visibly fucked from the outside and always has been since i was born. the left is as well, although to a much less (and likely ignorable) extent than the right. i’ve know about this forever; my parents at one point took me to a doctor who was like “yeah she’s shaped like a twizzler” but didnt actually recommend any action. therefore, it was assumed by all that there was nothing we could do and i just had to suffer my junji ito uzamaki curse forever.

which would suck because it’s not great. my family was not receptive to any complaints i had about my body hurting growing up so i just gave up on giving a shit about it. i’m going to start from the top bottom on pain:

sometimes i walk with a limp because my hip and knee joint would work in tandem to get a sharp pain that makes putting weight on it hard.

during my period, i usually end up with at least a day or two where i get deep toothache like pain in my thigh. its always there, not throbbing, and it just. aches.

for some reason my body favors it so when im standing i find myself almost completely leaning on it (which just makes it hurt more later). i can feel myself fucking my knees up when i do this because of how it has to shift around the twisted bone.

my knees swell up every time i kneel and put weight on them (growing up catholic made this excruciating).

walking is a nightmare. i usually try my best to pretend like my shins (specifically) aren’t screaming from mild exertion. i bought a step machine thinking i was just out of shape and a big whiner but it didn’t ever get better no matter how much and how consistently i did it. i though i was just assigned a really dogshit corporeal form that wasn’t built for improvement.

dont even think about running, buddy. i flip flap around like im wearing clown shoes AND it hurts like a bitch.

speaking of which, i also trip and fall on my own feet a lot. the doctor asked me this like “you don’t find yourself falling a lot while walking, right?” and i had to laugh because i eat shit at least 2x a month. i have a huge scar on my foot from last year.

now im about to upload some pictures of my legs. try not to scream. ignore the bruises, i spent all day yesterday/day before completely re-arranging my office so i beat the crap out of my legs lol.

here they are together, standing comfortably. im using the edge of our ugly tile as a straight edge for reference.

here’s the left one. i have no idea if this is normal. the doctor i saw yesterday said it was “less pronounced” on this side. i agree.

i look like im uploading instructions on how to hokey-pokey. anyway: right leg in. notice how it is, indeed, fucked up when lined up against the edge.

and here’s the knee straight. i really thought this was normal and i just had to deal with it for the rest of my life lol. i mean i still might uhhh let’s find out.

I AM LOOKING FOR INFORMATION FOR ADULTS:

pretty much everything online is for kids with assurances that they’ll “grow out of it” and absolutely no info otherwise for the rest of us. now for my QUESTIONS:

-which surgery would be done to correct this?

-i am an american, any idea what surgery cost might look like? (lol ignoring insurance, i want to see if im even close to the ballpark of it being feasible)

-how long is the surgery recovery time?

-can physical therapy correct this? if so, how long would it take?

-can you direct me to more information on living with out-toeing/duck footing/external tibial rotation? how can i manage symptoms?

-does anyone want to study me, because apparently im a rare specimen. im minting myself as an nft or whatever. fuck

ok thank you. please share if you want to but remember to tag it “long post” for people who dont want to be attacked by this big wall of legs

[barnes-n-nobles]

My Prisoner

Request: Can you do one very dark druig when the reader it's a resident in his comunity

She lives in his community, but always wanted to see the outside world, but he always manipulates her into not doing that, but when the deviants arrive she sees an opportunity to escape, but he doesn't let go and takes her with him and the eternals

I combined two asks as they were the same hope you kind anons dont mind!

Thank you for your request! Please reblog, like, and let me know what you think!

Warnings: dark themes, controlling Druig

18+ !!!! If you “keep reading” you are acknowledging that you are 18+ and that you have read the warnings.

Please Do not translate, no permission to repost any of my writing on any other platform, and do not copy this and claim it as your own.

Waking up every morning and doing the same routine was starting to get boring. Yes, being with Druig was amazing, but you felt like you wanted to seek adventure. See new places, meet new people, at least have a say in your life. Druig was very protective of you, never letting you leave the community due to all the dangers that existed outside. This was the only place he felt comfortable letting you roam around because he could keep an eye on you everywhere you went. To him this was the perfect place for you to be in. You didnt feel that way often arguing with him over this.

“I told you y/n..we cant leave this is the only place where it is safe for you” rubbing his thumb over your hand, gripping it. Frustrated, you walked away going back to what you wanted, “I know that! You keep repeating it like ive forgotten, I HAVENT! Im just wanting to explore the world, there is so much out there. Please…lets just go together then” you offer, hoping he would change his mind. This wasn’t fair, he promised you a life of adventure, not a life of confinement. You needed some change. “Do you want to know what happened in New York a couple years ago?” Angry at your stubbornness, “i mean yeah, who doesnt” feeling a little bold with your attitude, “Say that happens when youre out, how will I find you. Whos gonna pull you out of a whole if you get a damn building dropped on you?Hm? Whos going to even care enough to help you when everyone else is looking out for themselves…youre not ready to be alone y/n and im not going to risk something like that to happen to you. Youre all I have, I wont let you dig your own grave. Youre.Not.Leaving…Ever” his hot breath fanned over your face, now realizing how close he really was.

“I dont want to loose you princess. Please dont abandon me. Think about us” leaning into you, kissing your fluffy soft lips. “Okay..im sorry. I just get frustrated…i do the same thing everyday, it gets boring” venting out your feelings. “I know darling..I know. We’ll try to change it up okay? I promise, just give me some time” he offered bringing you close to him.

Another month went by, he kept up with his promise allowing you to explore the outside of the community, under one condition..that you let him inside your mind the entire time you were out. You were so excited and immediately took him up on his deal, however he found a loop whole. He only let you explore the tiniest bit of the forest, blocking your body from going any further than a couple feet away from the community. This was fucked up. Growing bored of this again, you went back to the same old routine, wishing that one day, you would be able to leave…not only the community, but Druig as well. He was a great boyfriend but if that meant that you couldn’t have freedom, then maybe you needed to trade him for it. When you made your way back to his cabin, your pace started to slow as you spotted new people. The strangest creature was on the ground..dead. Not knowing what to do, you just stayed still observing.

You couldn’t hear very well, but you tried your best to make out what they were saying. Something about needing Druig to go with them to do something. Your heart raced, both in excitement and nervousness. Could this finally be what you were asking for. If he was gone then there wouldn’t be anything or anyone stopping you from leaving. You walked backwards, hoping to not get noticed, turning around you walked toward the edge of the community, one foot passing over the barrier of where your body couldn’t. Placing one foot in from of the other you were finally able to go forward. Your smile was hard to contain as you started walking further and further away from the community. Felling a jolt of adrenaline, you started to run like a maniac. Laughing and twirling like a princess, you felt ultimate freedom finally. Your legs carrying you away from what felt like your own personal jail.

As you ran, you twisted your ankle, falling hard on the ground. Then you felt excruciating pain, you could literally feel your blood start to rush down to your ankle. As you sat up you winced at the pain, you couldn’t even put the least bit of pressure on it, the pain was too much. “Going somewhere?” A his voice rang from behind you, “I’m honestly kind of offended that you would run off like that” a sharpness to his words. Pulling you up by your arm, falling into his arms, yelping at the pain from your ankle. “Druig, my foot” leaning more towards him for support. He sat you down at a near by stump, Druig just stared at you, as if deciding what he was going to do next. After some moments of silence, you asked, “how did you find me?” Trying to move your ankle in circles. “I told you y/n…I’m here to protect you, when i found out you were gone I had to go find you. Wasn’t a surprise that i found you hurt, alone in a forest. Just accept the fact that you can’t leave me, it’ll be so much easier that way” raising his voice at you. “Look…I don’t want this for myself. I can’t settle down with you in the middle of a fucking forest when there a whole world out there for me to explore. This isn’t for me Druig, why don’t you try to understand me for once” your words felt like hot daggers piercing through his heart.

All that he’s done for you and you choose to throw it all away in the name of freedom. “Have you met someone else?” He asked, chest rising up and down, now fully angry. “Don’t be absurd, I don’t have contact with the outside world, how would I have met someone when I’ve been a prisoner to you” that question clearly upset you, now saying whatever the hell you felt like saying, not caring for his feelings anymore. Druig scoffed at you, “prisoner? You better watch your mouth. All I’ve ever been to you was good, how dare you say that to me. Your alive because of me. Ive kept you safe for all this time and what do I get in return? A fucking brat that doesn’t know how to appreciate me” walking up to you in a brisk motion, making you instantly regret how you had pushed him. His hand wrapped itself around your throat, bringing you up off your feet. Your hands went to his, trying to get them off as you struggled to breathe. “I’m going to show you how a real prisoner is treated, how they are tortured, abused, defiled. Anything you could possibly think of, because that’s what you will be from now on, my prisoner. You had a chance to be with me the good way, but you clearly need me to fix you.” Smirking as he saw you staring to fade, eyes glowing gold, “You will never leave my side. You cannot stand to live without me, the only time you’ll feel free and happy is with me.” Your eyes glowed gold as well, taking in everything he had told you before your body gave out on you. He brought you down again, sweeping you up into his arms.

“Oh my god what happened” Sersi’s voice yelled from behind him, he changed his expression to show worry. “She��s coming with us, she can’t be left alone. No one can protect her like I can”

[honeydew-mel0n]

Plz oh great author. I would just like... some dadV content. Just like. V and a child reader. Plz.

This probably isnt what you expected but, here's V being an adopted dad for a 5 year old reader in the ruins of Redgrave. It's not good, but its work. Ig

V x Child! Reader

Dad!V in the rubble of Redgrave.

You hide under the remnants of your bed. The ripped mattress and splintered frame providing little shelter from the horrors that lie beyond your eyelids. You weren't asleep, but still subscribed to the belief that the monsters couldn't get you if they thought you were asleep.

The sound of footsteps approaching lit a flame of hope in your heart, only for it to crash down the moment you heard the monsters come again.

It was so loud, crashing, screaming... were they fighting? If it was battle it ended quickly. And whatever entered your room won. You let out a soft whimper, curling into yourself. The foot steps approach the mess you called a bed. The sound of the mattress being pulled slightly made you burst into tears.

"Well, what do we have here?"

You open your tear filled eyes to see an adult, his black hair and dark clothes. "Mommy left me again- Are the monsters gone!?" His face was almost devoid of emotion. "Yes." "Are you sure?" At first. A smile smile splits his face as he offers you a tattoted hand. "Positive, little one."

_

We've seen before that he could care less about children at first glance, but the mentioning your mother leaving you caused him to instantly attach to you.

Alone, afraid, but this time, no way to protect yourself.

Deep down something inside of him told him that he needs to protect you. To take the job that your obviously useless mother could not handle.

You latch onto him quickly as well, your new protector. You think he's so cool, with his weird clothes, tattoos, and the funny things he says.

The second night he had you, you fell asleep pressed up against him as read a loud.

_

"When we see not thro the eye. Which was born in a night to perish in a night. When the soul slept in beams of light..."

He stops, green eyes boring down at your sleeping form. Your little hand wrapped over the edge of the corset under his coat. A small smile splits his face. Dispite all you had gone through, you still held peace. You would smile up at him after minutes of tucking your head into his side to hide your eyes from the gore that went on in front of you.

Your resilience is unyielding, and he cant help but admire that. It can make him forget that you are just a child. But now, layed out against his heart, he can see your vulnerability more then ever. You were so talkative, so kind, so soft, so... so... human. So very human. Just as he is now.

_

After some time with him, you'll be able to recite whole poems. And god he's never been more proud.

Technically, he's homeless, so finding somewhere safe for you to sleep is his first priority.

You never sleep alone. Never. Either he or one of his familiars is with you.

Scratch that, you are never alone.

He wasnt surprised by Shadow's fondness of you, but was by Griffon's.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah pip squeak, just don't pull on my feathers anymore."

V is easily annoyed, especially by people who talk too much. Unless it's you.

He can sit and listen to you chatter on in excessive detail about the random things you know.

Maybe that's why you and Griffon can get along. It's a constant back and forth of random facts and jokes that go right over your head.

You just like that he talks to you, he likes that he can make any joke and you won't get upset or offended.

V however, hates that he does this.

Seeing as how V tries his best to shield you from the world. You've already suffered so much.

He takes on the task of "dad" rather quickly.

_

You close your eyes tight as he pours the water from his cupped hands over your hair. V hums softly as he scrubs the filth from your skin. It was rather uncomfortable, taking a bath in a fountain, but it wasn't as uncomfortable as caked on dirt and splatters of demon blood. "We're almost done, I promise."

As soon as he found you to be clean enough he takes off his long leather jacket, dispite it just getting dry, he pulls you out and wraps it around you. He lays out your now dry and somewhat clean clothes and let's you try to dress yourself. Shadow letting you lean on her as you tug your clothes back on.

The warmth from fire used to cook the demon meat is enough to make you feel sleepy, if the exhausting day wasnt enough. You leaned against V's side, curling into him. His arm coming around you, assuring you that you're safe.

_

He accepts that he's pretty much your father very quickly.

But it hurts him. He knows what he has to do, and when that happens, what will happen to you? Who could he possibly trust to care for you?

He takes you everywhere, and doesn't let anything touch you.

It's truly Infuriating to him that he doesn't have the strength to carry you. Of course you ride on shadow, but when they handle demons you are left to mercy of the world.

The two of you being attached at the hip leads to a lot of confusion.

Mostly from Nero

"Why the hell do you have a kid???"

When he finally gets to settle down in Nico's van, you get to lay down for a nap.

And he leaves again, he leaves you to sleep. It was safe and he knew you would be fine there, and you definitely needed to sleep.

Nico, surprisingly, didnt mind you.

The entire time he was so nervous. It's been weeks, and this is the first time you haven't been with him.

When V eventually returns, he finds you chatting Nero's ear off. He didn't seem to mind though, he sat quietly with a smile as you talked.

It hit him then.

You could be safe without him.

_

He watched you fiddle with the metal fingers on Nero's devil breaker as you spoke. The young man making the fingers move, to your delight. Your eyes glowed and you looked up at Nero, he nods to what you're saying with a wide smile.

All of the worries in V's head melt away, but are soon replaced with a feeling of melancholy. You would be fine, you would be safe. Without him. He steps in, your head snaps to him, joy spreading on your features as soon at you realize. You run up to him, hugging his leg tightly.

It wasnt long until he has to leave again, and he knew it was the last time he would see you. And somehow, you knew something was wrong. Your small hands rest on his cheeks, sadness written on your entire being. He pulls you close, whispering to you softly. "I will see you again my little one. I will see you again."

Tiny arms hold tight around his neck, warm, wet tears slip down and fall onto his skin. "Are you sure?" "Positive, little one." You hold on tight to him, even after he lets go. Theres a soft whisper, bairly audible. "I love you, daddy." Then, you let go.

Getting to wave him off while holding onto Nico's leg.

_

He knew he wouldnt see you again, either he dies, or becomes one again. The likelihood of seeing you again with both of those options is little to none.

But he feels peace, you'd be safe. You are safe.

He gets weaker and weaker.

He's been close to it before, but this must be what dieing feels like.

Before reuniting with his other half, he still tries to make sure that you will be okay.

His crumbling body is leaning on Nero, hobbling to the end of his life.

"The child... If you survive, take care of them."

[samanthadalton]

Star Crossed Lovers (part 14)

Do my eyes deceive me???? part 14???? we did it. im so sorry its taken forever, i will try my best to be more consistent with my writing. love yall for being patient with me it means the most. thank you, thank you. 

warnings: throughout this fic there will be mentions of substance abuse, homophobia, sexual abuse, violence, NSFW, mentions of abandonment, depression and death including suicide

reader discretion is advised

warnings: angst, swearing (lots of it) 

taglist: @drmmyrs @cloud9in @somewillwin @save-me-the-last-dance @baexpoppy @stanzoeywade @ognenniyvolk @thepotatobleh @crazzyplays @fall3ngods @helpconfusedpersonhere @clowneryme @dopeyouth @boys-girls-i-cant-help-it-baby @vonda-b-real @uselesslesbianfr @veenast @cloakanddaggerthings @somethindarker (sorry again if ive missed anyone, if you wanna be added on this taglist or my general one just let me know 😊) 

word count: 4k (i feel like its short considering how long it took me to write but i still hope you guys enjoy) (also i didnt check for grammatical errors properly so sorry if you find any) 

part 1 part 2 part 3 part 4 part 5 part 6 part 7 part 8 part 9 part 10 part 11 part 12 part 13

The first steps to moving on 

“Bea please,” Poppy whispers, a repentant look creeping up to her face as she looks away from her girlfriend. “It can’t wait.” 

Bea sighs, her shoulders slumping as the last remains of her anger disseminates from her body. “Okay fine, lead the way babe.” 

Poppy stiffens that the pet name but she doesn’t let her awkwardness slip as she leads Bea to a secluded classroom, far away from prying eyes. Both her and Bea turn to look at each other, and both simultaneously open their mouths to talk. 

“I know you wanted to tell-” 

“We need to talk-” 

Both clamp their lips shut, a mutual smile playing on their lips as they look at one another. 

“You go first,” Poppy gestures towards Bea, as she moves to sit on the edge of a desk. 

Bea inhales softly, her tongue darts out licking her lips as she looks down at the ground, her face calculating. “Why does Chloe hate me?” She looks up to Poppy, her eyes boring into the strawberry blonde’s, sadness swimming inside of them, “I just don’t get what I’ve done for her to hate me.” 

Poppy sighs heavily, her eyes awkwardly darting away from Bea’s. “It’s complicated Bea.” 

“Complicated?” Bea lets out a humourless laugh, “I almost just went off on Chloe after she gave her condolences for my mom dying because I just felt she wasn’t genuine and you wanna tell me it's complicated?” 

Poppy sharply inhales, contemplating for a few moments before saying, “it’s because of your mom.” 

Bea scrunches her brows up in confusion, “my mom? What the hell does she have to do with this?” 

Poppy ineptly plays with her hands, not being able to look Bea in her eyes, “at first it was just a classist thing. When you first came to Belvoire, she just wanted to make herself feel superior over you, but in the last year you’ve noticed her getting more mean right?” 

“Right.” Bea stares at Poppy, her expression emotionless. 

“Chloe’s parents have been fighting non stop recently, and it’s been affecting her a lot.” 

Bea’s brows furrow in confusion, “what does that have to do with me or my mom?” 

“Just let me explain first before you react, please.” Bea’s eyes bore into Poppy’s for a few seconds before she nods understandingly. “Her dad cheated on her mom. A lot of times actually. But he was blackmailed by one of the women he slept with.” Poppy pauses for a few seconds, “your mom.” 

Bea lets out a shaky breath, her eyes blinking in disbelief, “no, you’re lying.” 

Poppy nervously bites her bottom lip, “look Bea-” 

“How long have you known?”

Poppy’s face scrunches up in anger, “this isn’t my fault Bea. I only found out that day I went to talk to Chloe about us. Chloe made me promise not to say anything to you-” 

“Poppy! My mom OD and I don’t even know why. And now you’re telling me she was blackmailing the St James family and it doesn’t occur to you that might have had something to do with her death?” 

“They’re not the fucking mafia Bea, jesus. They were trying to settle it quietly by giving your mom some money and make her sign some stuff so she couldn't threaten them anymore.” 

The devastating ramification of Poppy’s admission hangs in the air as the two girls let the words settle into them. “Chloe really is sorry about your mom Bea, we all are.” 

Bea sighs, staring off into space, as a few tears begin to fill up in her eyes. “I just don’t know what to do.” Bea begins sniffling, but Poppy makes no movement to console her girlfriend. Bea notices and her expression sobers, “so, uh what did you wanna tell me?” Bea sniffs a few more times, before looking up at Poppy, giving her a small encouraging smile. 

Poppy looks away, guilt creeping up on her face, as she tries her damndest not to catch Bea’s small smile on her face. “Bea…”. Bea carefully assesses her girlfriend’s demeanour, noticing the similar body language during when they first asked to take a break, she thinks back to the last couple of days, she had barely heard from her girlfriend, and now she’s not affectionate, even after she almost had a mental breakdown in the middle of the hallway and her smile drops. “We have to break up,” Poppy says, her tone so monotone and dry as if she didn’t mean the words she was saying at all. 

“I don’t understand,” is all Bea can muster, evidently hurt by Poppy’s admission. Poppy winces slightly at Bea’s tone, finally breaking her robotic demeanour as she lets out a few sniffles. “So is that it? We have to break up,” Bea retorts mockingly, “is that all I get after all these years?” 

“Bea..” Poppy reaches out but Bea immediately takes a step back, tears flooding in her eyes. 

“No,” she holds her hands up, “I don’t get it, things are going good, or at least whatever twisted definition of good we’ve made up. Where the hell did this come from?” 

“Bea my dad-” 

“Of course! Hayden Min fucking Sinclair had something to do with this. Why do you still live under his shadow? You talk all this shit about breaking out of your father’s prison and wanting to achieve your own goals but he sucks you back in.” 

“That’s not fair Bea,” Poppy interjects, balling her hands up into fists in an attempt to subdue her trembling, “my dad has given me so much and he’s threatening to take it all away.” 

“Yeah, all you have to do is get rid of me. Me or the Min Sinclair name.” 

“Bea this is the life I have, okay I’m not like you, I’m not built like you.” 

“So what? I can grow up without a dad and now without a mom but it’s okay because I’m used to pain and disappointment?” 

“I didn’t mean it like that, you have a plan, things you can achieve, I need the Min Sinclair name, I’m nothing without it.” 

“Wow.” Bea shakes her head, “So I just meant nothing?” Bea wildy throws her arms in the air, anger bubbling under the surface of her demeanour. “We’ve practically been together since we were kids. And you’re just gonna fucking throw that away? And for what? Fuck you Poppy.” 

Poppy takes half a step back, dumbfounded by Bea’s outburst. She scrunches her brows, evidently hurt, “you don’t get it Bea. Even though your mom wasn’t the best, she still supported you, even if you didn’t know about it. My dad he- my mom what would she think?” 

“Your mom? Poppy what kind of shit is your dad brainwashing you with? Your mom is dead! You have no idea how she would react to having a gay daughter, but I know she’s probably disappointed in you.” 

“Fuck you Bea.”Poppy runs out of the classroom, tears streaming down her face, leaving Bea on her own. 

“Shit,” Bea whispers to herself before throwing a bunch of punches at the wall, each more cathartic than the last until she can’t physically hold herself up anymore. Bea defeatedly slides into a chair, cradling her head in between her hands, letting the tears free fall, as reality begins setting in that she lost the one thing in the world that was her everything. Poppy Min Sinclair was her rock, the girl who she gave her heart to, the love of her life and just in a matter of moments it was over. Maybe it was too good to be true. The beautiful, perky popular rich girl and the girl who had almost nothing, complete polar opposites, it never should’ve worked. But time and time again when faced against the world they persevered so why was this time different? Poppy had chosen her namesake over the love of her life. She chose the life of glitz and glamour over the girl who gave her her entire heart. Bea feels her entire world crashing down, how much more heartbreak could she take? Was her life always going to be so hard? So full of hurt? Full of pain? She winces at the thought, her head hammering as she comes to the realisation that she understood her mother’s pain more than she thought. 

…. 

Bea hops off her bike, parking it in front of her house, as she pulls her phone out to look at the time. ‘It’s lunch time,’ she thinks to herself. After the day she had today, school wasn’t the best option for her right now. She makes her way to her front door but stops in her tracks when she realises her front door is slightly ajar. Her survival instincts kick in as she effortlessly pulls out her pocket knife, carefully pushing the door fully open. As she steps into the living room, her eyes dart to the closed door of her mother’s room, but when she hears a creaking sound coming towards her bedroom, she cautiously moves towards the source of the noise, the grip on her knife tightening. As she creeps up, she sees the door of her room half opened, a hooded figure standing by her bed with their back facing her. 

Bea stealthily sneaks up to the figure placing the knife a few inches from their throat before lowering her voice to a threatening tone, “who are you and what the fuck are you doing?” The figure gasps, dropping a bag that’s in their hands with a deafening thud before raising their hands in a sign of surrender. 

“It’s me, it’s me,” the voice whimpers out. 

“AJ?” Bea raises her eyebrows, retracting the knife from his throat while pulling down his hood with her other hand. “What the fuck are you doing?” Bea takes a step back while AJ scrambles grabbing the bag he just dropped moments before. When he turns to face Bea, his eyes are wide, filled with fear as he clutches the bag closely to his chest. 

“I have to go,” he says as he attempts to run out of the room, but Bea pulls him back, her face crumpled in suspicion. 

“No we’re not doing this, give me the bag now,” Bea snatches the bag out of his hands before he can protest and opens the zipper to find it filled with cash. She grits her teeth, anger settling into her features as she whips her head up to AJ, “is this my fucking money?” 

“Bea, I- I can explain-” 

“What the fuck AJ!” Bea throws the bag onto the bed, the cash spilling out as she jabs an accusing finger at AJ’s chest. “You’re stealing from me now? I haven’t seen you in god knows how long, you don’t call, text nothing. Even after everything that’s been happening in the last few weeks but you have the audacity to fucking steal from me? Money that I’ve spent years saving? Money that I’ve bussed my fucking ass off for, are you serious right now?” Bea’s voice is filled with rage as she’s practically screaming, her voice now thundering. AJ winces, guiltily averting his gaze to the ground, unable to meet Bea’s eyes. 

“I’m sorry about your mom Bea, I wanted to visit-” AJ croaks out.

“But you didn’t,” Bea interjects, her voice lowered but filled with hurt. “And now you’re taking money- I mean what is so important you had to steal from me.” 

AJ paces towards the bed, hanging his head in shame, when he speaks his voice is quiet, full of fear, “I’m in some bad shit Bea. These guys aren’t playing around.” 

“I told you not to fall into the wrong crowd, I warned you this shit would happen.” 

“Bea please, I’ll pay you back I just need it.” 

“No! What the fuck, when will you pay me back huh? This is my college money, I’m not letting you give that away to your crackhead friends.” 

“Bea please,” AJ clasps his hands together, his tone pleading, “I don’t know what to do.” 

“AJ I have too much shit on my plate right now, I can’t deal with this. You need to find something else, I can’t help you.” 

AJ’s face pales but he stands up, and makes his way towards the door, before leaving he turns to look back at Bea, “I’m sorry about everything.” 

Bea keeps her eyes trained on her bed where the money is sprawled all over the mattress, “yeah me too,” she replies quietly. Bea hears the front door close and she collapses to the ground, letting the tears flow. 

……

A few days later, Bea sits in her dark living room, curtains shut and lights completely off as she wallows in her sadness, drinking from a bottle of cheap beer, as she stares absentmindedly at the ceiling, so drowned in her thoughts she doesn’t hear the resounding knocks on her door until she hears a voice call out, “Bea! Are you there?” 

Bea crumples her brows, forcing herself to stand as she makes her way to the door, she wearily makes her way to her front door only slightly opening the door before poking her head out. “Veronica?” Veronica gives the girl a wide smile before pushing the door more open, ushering the figure behind her into the house too, “Carter? What are you guys doing here?’ 

Veronica looks around the dark room, noticing the pile of empty beer bottles on the floor, “yikes, drinking on your own on a friday night Hughes? That’s really sad.” Carter stands near the edge of the living room, as if he’s an explorer, his eyes darting all over the living room as he assesses this new environment. 

Bea on the other hand scowls at Veronica, “what the hell do you want Veronica, I’m not in the mood.” 

Veronica frowns slightly, pouting her lips together, “we heard about you and Poppy.” 

Bea rolls her eyes, “yeah well I’m trying to forget about her.” Bea picks up her beer bottle from the ground and makes a show by exaggeratingly drinking from the bottle until it's empty. She discards the empty bottle along with the other ones before turning to look at Veronica and Carter, “so if you’ll excuse me.” 

Veronica steps towards Bea, wrapping her hand around the brunette’s arm, “we’re not here for Poppy stupid, we’re here for you.” 

Bea raises an eyebrow, “for me?” 

Veronica turns to look at Carter, beckoning him forward, Carter breaks out of reverie and clears his throat, “yeah uh, we wanted to take you to a party.” 

“A party?” Bea looks between them confused, “I’m not that interested guys.”

“Wait, wait, wait Bea,” Veronica pleads, pulling Bea closer to her, “you’ve never been to a Belvoire party and the year is almost over, we thought we should take you to at least.” 

“I don’t know guys,” Bea says skeptically, “a lot of people don’t like me.” 

“Who gives a shit? You just had your heart broken and you need to let loose.” 

Bea sighs, pulling away from Veronica, “I don’t think it’s a good idea.” 

“Come on, it beats drinking in the dark on your own.” 

Bea sighs, dropping her shoulders, “what about uh Poppy?” 

“Poppy?” Veronica arches a brow, “her and Chloe are staying in tonight, she said she needed to catch up on homework or something.” 

Bea purses her lips together in thought before sighing,  “fine.” Veronica cheers, “but,” Bea over enunciates, “only for a few hours and if I don’t like it I’m going home.” 

“Okay, deal,” Veronica squeals, wrapping Bea in a big hug. Carter chuckles as Veronica gestures for him to join the hug, he awkwardly wraps his arms around the two girls, before pulling away. 

“Okay, I’ll wait in the car while you girls get ready. Just uh don’t take too long.”

Veronica playfully rolls her eyes as she Bea towards her bedroom, yelling back “thanks Carter.” Giddy, she rushes to Bea’s closest, assessing her clothes until she finds a short red dress hidden in the back. “This!” 

“No, no, no,” Bea shakes her head, pulling the dress out of the ombre-haired girl’s hands. 

“Why not? It would look so hot on you,” Veronica’s eyes trail down Bea’s body, as she sharply inhales. “Bea, you’re single and sexy, stop holding yourself back okay?” 

“I’m not,” Bea pushes back defensively, “I just-” she sighs heavily, “no one at Belvoire has ever seen me dressed up, I’m just- I’m nervous I guess.” 

“Then we have to show them what they’ve been missing for the last three years,” Veronica gives Bea a devilish smile as she takes the dress from Bea’s hands, sliding the dress off the hanger before handing it over to Bea. 

“Uh you gonna stay in the room?” Bea nervously wrings her hands together. 

“Why, are you offering a show?” Veronica lifts a teasing brow, noticing Bea’s cheeks redden slightly, which prompts her to let out a small laugh, “I’m kidding, don’t worry I won’t look.” Veronica makes a show of raising her hands to cover her eyes. Bea laughs as she slips out of her clothes and into the dress, she awkwardly clears her throat, grabbing Veronica’s attention. 

“Hey, uh help a girl out with her zipper?” 

“Sure,” Veronica moves to stand behind Bea, her hands ghosting around Bea’s exposed back, her breath momentarily taken away. She sturdies herself and places one of her hands on the small of the brunette’s back while the other moves towards the zipper, zipping the girl up. Bea smooths the dress down with her hands appreciating herself in the mirror, “you look gorgeous,” Veronica whispers into the shell of her ear. 

Bea’s face completely flushes red and slightly jerks at Veronica’s admission, “uhh thanks.” 

Veronica notices the awkward shift in the atmosphere, and promptly changes the subject, “so where’s your sister?” 

Bea sits in front of her mirror, a comb in her hand as she brushes her long locks, “she’s staying at a friend’s tonight.” 

“Cool,” Veronica answers back but her tone falls flat. The girls bask in the awkward silence as Bea continues to get ready but when Veronica notices Bea struggling to do her winged eyeliner she breaks the silence. “Hey do you need help?” 

Bea smiles bashfully, “yeah.” She rubs the back of her head with her hand, “sorry Poppy used to help me with my makeup.” 

“Right,” Veronica’s face slightly falls but she quickly covers it up, ushering Bea to come and sit on the bed. “Come on, I don’t bite,” Veronica bites the bottom of her lip, “unless you want me too.” Bea laughs but obliges sitting on the edge of the bed. Veronica clambers onto her lap, her thighs settling on the sides of Bea’s legs, and in response, Bea’s eyes widen in surprise but she remains glued in her spot, too shocked to move. 

“V, what are you doing?” Bea whispers, her voice attempting to come across as reprimanding but it comes out as breathy. 

“Relax, I’m just doing your eyeliner.” Veronica plucks the wand from Bea’s hand and angles herself close to the brunette’s face, as she begins drawing on the wings on Bea’s eyelids. Bea steadies herself, as she feels the heat of Veronica’s body so close to hers and when Veronica is finished with putting the finishing touches on her eyelids, she hops off Bea’s lap, making her way towards the desk, scuffling through Bea’s makeup bag before taking up her place on Bea’s lap once again. “Now I think this colour would look good on you,” 

“You don’t think it’s too much red?” 

“Oh babe, red means power, dominance, you don’t wanna be thinking about Poppy the entire night, you wanna have all eyes on you Bea Hughes.” Veronica uncaps the lipstick, her eyes burning into Bea’s lips as she carefully applies the red colour to her lips. “Perfect.” 

Bea smacks her lips together, evenly spreading the red on her lips. “Thanks V.” 

Veronica’s eyes dart to Bea’s lips, her tongue slightly running along her bottom lips before she breaks out of her reverie flashing Bea a smirk, “don’t thank me yet, thank me when you’re having the time of your life at the party.” Veronica slides off Bea’s lap, holding her hand out, “come on let’s finish up because Carter’s been waiting for a while.” Bea smiles up at Veronica, taking her hand as she lets the ombre-haired girl pull her off the bed, as they continue getting ready. 

………

Once they arrive at the party, Carter drops the girls off at the front of the huge house before telling them he will park the car. Veronica’s gaze darts to Bea, who’s nervously toying with her hands, looking up at the intimidating house, the lights blaring and as the music echoes throughout, the bass thumping in their ears. Noticing the nerves settling into her, Veronica slips into Bea's, giving her a reassuring squeeze, “hey, it’s okay, it’s just a bunch of drunk, preppy uptight teenagers, nothing you don't usually face everyday.” 

Bea lets out a small laugh, “just in a big ass house,” she jests. 

“Yeah, just in a big ass house,” she gives Bea a light squeeze as she starts pulling Bea into the house with her. Automatically, they’re met with stares and whispers, as the students look astonished at Bea, some appraising her outfit, while others are confused about her presence. “Hey, just stay with me okay?” Veronica whispers over to Bea. Bea nods, her eyes roaming the room. “I’ll get us drinks.” The ombre-haired girl gives Bea a reassuring pat on her arm and leaves her side and Bea walks into the living room, observing the difference between the vibes of the party between the north and the south. Her thoughts then move to think about Poppy, how Poppy would love going to parties in the north but Bea couldn’t find the appeal in it. Poppy. Poppy, who broke up with her. She’s interrupted from her thoughts by a tap of her shoulder, and Bea turns around to see Veronica offering her a red solo cup, Bea takes a sip and winces. 

“What the hell is this crap?” 

“Yeah for a bunch of rich kids, their taste in beer isn’t the best,” Veronica jokes, slightly nudging Bea. 

“We have way better beer in the south side.” 

“That I can agree with.” Veronica looks over to Bea who looks lost in thought, “hey what are you thinking about?” 

Bea sighs heavily, “Poppy,” she mutters. 

Veronica nods once, “right, yeah.” 

“Poppy would’ve loved a party like this, big fancy house an-” 

“Bea,” Veronica says, her tone slightly agitated, “this,” she gestures around the room, “is a no Poppy zone. That means we don’t think about Poppy, only about fun.” 

Bea nods, “fun. I can do that.” Veronica lifts her cup in the air, “what are we cheering to?” 

Veronica gives Bea a smile, “here’s to the first steps in moving on.” The girls tap their cups together before downing their drinks. “Now if we wanna get drunk, we’re gonna need a lot more of these.” 

The party is still ongoing, and Bea sits in a circle with a few girls from the volleyball team and a few of the football team and other people she doesn’t recognise while Veronica sits beside her. 

“Bea you look so pretty,” one of her teammates says. 

“Yeah Bea your makeup is literally gorgeous,” another chimes in. 

“Who knew strip tease can clean up well,” Ford jests, but Bea slumps her shoulders a little, remembering that these people are not her friends. 

Carter enters the circle slapping Ford on the head as he goes, “shut up, Hughes is cool.” Bea gives Carter a nod of appreciation before looking down at the drink in her hands. Her thoughts move a million miles a minute, but there’s a constant one stuck in her brain, Poppy.

Veronica looks over at Bea, frowning. “Hey come with me.” She stands, excusing herself from the group and Bea follows her close behind. 

“Where are we going?” 

“We’re gonna play a private game of truth or drink.” 

[comfyswitcherblanketfort]

How To Calm Your Witcher

i am shit at titles please forgive me i know its tacky lol. the Goob Squad gave me like an ounce of positive reinforcement for purring Geralt and tbh this was v good for the wack ass day i had so this is what yall are stuck with.

Warnings: overwhelmed potion geralt, description of said overwhelming sensation, kinda anxiety attack adjacent but theres some BIG comfort, purring witcher. 

__________

Geralt marched through the halls in a huff, Jaskier keeping pace but lagging behind just a bit as they made their way to the quarters that this particularly obtuse lord had not so graciously assigned them for the duration of the hunt. Geralt had prepared for a menacing beast, potions and all, only to find some delinquents faking a mauling because they’d had too much to drink and got bored. They’d probably never drink again after the scare Geralt gave them, but the lord wasn't satisfied. Geralt assumed he never was. 

The only reason Geralt didn’t slam the door when they made it through the maze was that Jaskier was behind him. He was shaking, all that adrenaline with nowhere to go made his hands curl into tight fists and he could hear too many people. The floor above them was relatively empty but below must have been the kitchen or laundry and it was starting to drive him insane after only a few moments in the room. 

He ripped his armor off, hoping that removing the tight bands of leather keeping it in place might make him feel like he fit within his skin again. It only made him cold. 

Jaskier picked up the pieces he’d chucked  and laid them in a pile before carefully stacking logs in the ridiculously sized hearth. Geralt barely registered him hauling blankets and furs out of a chest at the foot of the bed, too distracted by the noises and every single one of his hairs shifting as he moved. It felt like he was covered in spiders and wading through water all at once. Everything was too slow and too detailed and he just wanted to charge back into the dining hall and beat the lord with his ham bone. 

“Geralt?” Jaskier’s voice couldn’t even be called a whisper; it was so faint, “Can you come light this please?”

Geralt cracked his neck as he turned and stalked over to the hearth. He didnt need to cast such a dramatic sign, but fuck he needed to do something. Jaskier was already standing back, seemingly prepared for his outburst. 

“Can you sit down so I can unlace your boots?”

Could he? For that velvet soft voice he could do anything. His boots were rather soaked too, and he could feel the beginnings of a blister forming where the new leather had yet to soften. He let Jaskier lead him to a specific pillow and settled onto it, extending his legs and glaring into the fire. The pops and hisses of bubbling sap was helping to mask the sounds from below, but it didn't feel like nearly enough. Jaskier slowly tugged off his boots, keeping his touches deliberate but soft as he replaced the waterlogged woolen socks with a warm fresh pair. Geralt wiggled his toes a bit, happy with the feeling of something soft against the tops of his toes. 

Jaskier settled in behind him and raked his fingers through Geralt’s hair, “How does this feel?”

Geralt hummed, honestly not sure of his answer, and continued to stare into the fire.

The bard quickly braided his waves off to the side, very practical compared to his usual work, and wrapped his arms around Geralt’s waist, resting his chin on his shoulder, “What’s too much?”

Geralt only snarled. It was a stupid question. Everything was too much. 

“Is it the noise?”

A nod.

“What about your skin?”

Geralt swallowed hard and forced his words out, “Little hairs.”

Jaskier shimmied back to lean against a heavy leather chair, pulling Geralt with him before draping blanket after blanket after blanket over them; finishing the stack with a bearskin. They were cocooned in soft, but not sticky fabric that kept all Geralt’s hair pressed to his skin and a weight that made his legs feel hollow and filled with lead. He could finally take a slow deep breath, feeling his back press into Jaskier’s stomach as his lungs expanded. 

“Better?” Jaskier breathed, placing a gentle kiss to Geralt’s temple.

He nodded, turning his head into Jaskier’s chest to breathe in his scent. 

“What else do you need, love?”

Geralt’s hands resting on Jaskier’s thighs beneath the blankets involuntarily squeezed when someone dropped what sounded like a dragon sized cauldron on the level below, “Hum for me?”

Jaskier immediately started humming one of Geralt’s favorite songs, pressing a kiss to his hair as he did. The soft rumbles of the bard’s voice and his heartbeat gave Geralt something to focus on other than the cacophony from below. As Jaskier’s voice grew gradually stronger there were gradually less and less distractions, only the pleasant, comforting sound of his lover’s voice and the gentle vibrations emanating from his chest. Geralt shifted slightly and pressed his ear to Jaskier’s sternum, sighing at the warmth of his bard’s skin against the side of his face and the loud, reassuring thrum of his heartbeat. Jaskier clasped his hands together over Geralt’s stomach and the little bit of added pressure did wonders. 

Before he knew it, his eyes were fluttering closed and there was a deep rumble accompanying the rise and fall of his chest. He stayed pleasantly pinned to his lover as they waited for the potions to leave his system, purring in accompaniment to Jaskier’s soft singing. Geralt’s purrs started to fade as he drifted closer and closer to sleep, still not entirely feeling clean, but clean enough.

“How are you feeling?” Jaskier’s whisper, coaxed him back from the edge of consciousness just before he was about to fall. 

He purred louder in response, something that always made Jaskier smile. 

“Alright, let’s get you into the bed, yeah?”

Geralt let himself be propped up on his feet while Jaskier peeled his breaches off and tucked him under the covers before laying the heavy bearskin over him yet again. 

“Jask?” Geralt’s voice was more of a croak as he lifted his head off the pillow to search for his bard, “C’m to bed.”

“Already here, love.” Jaskier shuffled over under the covers, pressing himself to Geralt’s back and tucking his thighs up under Geralt’s.

Geralt started purring again as Jaskier pressed a kiss to the base of his neck and snaked an arm around his waist, “I love you,” he sighed, making sure Jaskier could feel just how happy he was through the vibrations in his chest.

“And I you,” Jaskier hummed, giving Geralt a light squeeze, “Now sleep, darling.”

He fought sleep as long as he could, wishing he could stay in this moment forever, but eventually Geralt stopped purring and fell into a deep, restful sleep. 

[xoxo-teddybear]

Oh, The Lies You Tell - Bakugou Katsuki - pt. 1

Bakugou x f!reader

Warnings: angst, trauma, abuse, betrayal, fluff, slice of life, smut, cursing, manipulation, possible spoilers, physical harm, 18+

BAKUGOU’S MASTERLIST

Ep. Warnings: cursing, mentions of abuse and manipulation, slice of life(ish), manga spoilers!!

A/N: Ok so this is just what I daydream about, and since ima tv addict, I’m involving some “Avatar: The Last Airbender” related things, but a little different. This is more of an introduction to our character but I hope you enjoy!

Pt.1 Pt.2 Pt.3 Pt.4 Pt.5 Pt.6 Pt.7 Pt.8 Pt.9

Summary: It’s Y/N’s first day at UA.....as a “former” villain

“Y/N L/N. She’s a new transfer student. Treat her with your respect and do your best to take care of her.” The tired teacher spoke.

“.......Hey. Please treat me well.” The intimidating girl said as she bowed in respect.

Now if you were to see Y/N on the streets as a stranger, you wouldn’t even think she would have this threatening aura. The class agreed. She’s gorgeous. From a far, you would think she’s a sweetheart, But the girl had a cold, calm stare in her E/C eyes. There was actually no way to describe it. It was just chilling to the bone.

Not only that, but it was clear you were a little rebel. Mainly because of the way you decided to change up your uniform. Your sleeves were torn off to make your button up top some sort of tight fitted turtle neck with a tie that was complimenting your busty figure. Especially since it was tightly tucked into your skirt, pressing against your torso instead of loosely sitting in there like the other girls. You also added a small dark brown belt to cover where your skirt and top meet. Your waist gave the perfect show of how curvaceous you truly were. Your thighs were deliciously thick and your ass must’ve been a perfect peach, considering it caused your skirt to seem a little too small for you. Instead of the typical shoes and knee high socks, you opted for thigh high dark brown leather boots that folded at the top to match your belt. No heel though, of course. Gotta keep it casual. You finished off your rebellious look with a pair of black leather fingerless gloves. Do you look like trouble? Yup. Do you look hot as hell though? You bet.

“You may be seated next to Katsuki Bakugou.” Your new teacher spoke. Before anybody else could give an indication of who this “Bakugou” boy was, an electric blonde spoke up.

“Be careful with that one pretty lady, he’s our resident hot head.” The boy spoke while the entire class giggled.

“Shut it dunce face.” Your eyes shifted from one blonde to another. This time with a spiky head of ash blonde hair and piercing red eyes. As you walk towards your new seat, you made eye contact with the spiky blonde, you saw the look on his face. Just like everyone else, a face of fear and shock, except this time the person didn’t know who you were.

Bakugou could definitely say upon first glance, you were definitely something fierce. It threw him off just how powerful your presence was. He quickly turned away as you took your seat.

As class began, everyone had their eyes on Y/N. Some admiring her beauty, others wary of her aura, and some too nervous to mention their newfound fear of her. In the middle of Mr. Aizawa’s boring lecture, a scratch at the door could be heard.

‘A scratch?’ Everyone thought. But Y/N knew exactly who it was.

When Mr. Aizawa went to open the door, in came what appears to be a wolf-dog. Mr. Aizawa seemed to casually accept it and just expected you to explain. He was too tired to deal with this crazy shit.

“Oh..there you are Rumor. Took you long enough to find this place.” The creature, also somehow intimidating, simply just huffed at the girl and layed down next to her seat in between her and Bakugou.

“L/N, please explain to the class why Rumor is here. They clearly seem to be confused.” Y/N looked around the room to see her new classmates staring at her and her furry friend.

“*sigh* he’s my animal companion.” You simply stated. Apparently it didn’t satisfy your peers because a freckled, green haired boy spoke up.

“Animal companion? Like a service dog?” The timid boy asked. You secretly rolled your eyes at the fact you’ll have to answer this question again. That is until Bakugou spoke.

“You damn nerd, if he was a service dog, she woulda said that now, don’t ‘cha think?” ‘Dunce face and a damn nerd huh? Wonder what new nickname this hedgehog will give me.’ Your little quip made you give the smallest smile with a quiet laugh to yourself

What you didnt realize was that during your little moment, Bakugou was watching you the entire time. He fought the blush that was threatening to rise and successfully won. ‘The hell?’ Bakugou thought. Since when did he blush?

“He’s right. Rumor isn’t my service dog, he’s my animal companion. And no, not my pet. He’s more like a close friend. My best friend if anything. He’s also not a dog either, he’s a changeling.” You explained hoping someone else knew what a changeling was. Thankfully, the “damn nerd” did.

“Changeling? I thought they were just a myth.” He said. “What the heck is a changeling, Deku?” You turned and saw it was a girl with a round face and pink cheeks. ‘Deku? How rude’ you thought to yourself.

“Changelings were rumored to be magical like beasts who could take the form of any animal they chose. Those forms could be as real as eagles and bears or as mythical as dragons and unicorns. They could also change the size of their form too. Am I right, L/N?” Deku asked you.

“You’re completely right, Deku.” The green haired boy blushed at his nickname on your tongue. “Rumor can be any creature I command. His wolf-dog form is his casual form though. It’s the form he took at birth I guess.”

“You guess?” Bakugou asked.

“Yes, I guess. I didn’t have Rumor since he was born. I found him while I was on a walk in the forest. We just clicked, and he followed me home. That’s when I discovered his powers and what he was, and seeing that changelings were only rumored to have existed, I thought it would’ve been a fitting name. We’ve been together ever since, and not only does he work as a friend, he’s a fighter too. He’s like a partner to me which is exactly why principle Nezu allowed him to attend UA with me. I guess you could say he’s part of my...uhm..quirk” You thoroughly explained. You couldn’t help it. You loved talking about Rumor. He was your best friend and definitely one of a kind.

Rumor looked up at you and barked. You turned to pet him on the head and gave him a little smile. Something that didn’t go unnoticed by the resident hot head, which once again caused him to fight back a blush. ‘The fuck is going on with me today?’ The blonde thought to himself. Finally satisfied with the answers, the class picked up where they left off and continued to learn about quirks which didn’t seem all that useful to you since....you don’t have one.

——————————————————————————

Later

“Remember, we will all be meeting at gym gamma tomorrow morning, so don’t bother coming to the classroom. Just meet up there with any comfortable gym wear.” Mr. Aizawa said at the end of the day.

“Yes sir!” The class all said. “L/N stay behind, I need to speak to you and Rumor.” The tired teacher said with a yawn.

“Yes sir.” You calmly replied.

As the class gathered their things to leave, some came up to speak to you. First it was Deku and the round faced girl.

“Welcome to UA L/N. My name is Izuku Midoriya!” Deku said.

“Oh my apologies. I thought I heard that your name was Deku.” You said so nonchalantly with your sweet voice.

“Well it’s just a nickname that started up with Kacchan.” The boy was now blushing in slight embarrassment while rubbing the back of his head.

“Kacchan? I’m sorry, I don’t know who that is.” You said.

“Oh right! My bad, Kacchan is Bakugou. It’s a name I gave him during our childhood.” He stated.

“Seems a little mean.” You chuckled

“Yeah but he’s always been like that.” The boy smiled with a small laugh.

“I think I can tell. He must be really nice to Deku and Dunce face.”

You both shared a laugh at your little sarcastic poke at the explosive blonde that the girl was feeling a little left out.

“Anyways, I’m Ochako Uraraka! I was really hoping I could talk to you more but Deku over here can’t seem to keep his mouth shut.” the girl slightly teased.

“Meh. No worries. We’re gonna be stuck together for the next few years. We have plenty of time to get to know each other.” You so kindly spoke as you gathered your stuff.

“Totally! We can-“ Uraraka was cut off by a very handsome two toned boy with a scar. He definitely reminded you of some you knew. You watched as he came up to speak to Midoriya.

“Hey, Midoriya. Did you want to...” you tuned out his conversation. You simply just stared at him in awe. No doubt about it. He was definitely Dabi’s brother. But he was a whole lot more handsome.

The boy caught onto your staring and introduced himself.

“Hello L/N, my name is Shoto Todoroki. You may know me from my father, Endeavor, but I assure you, I’m nothing like him. In fact it’s safe to say I hate him.” He stated ever so calmly. ‘Wow. So blunt. And I guess hating Endeavor runs in the family’

“Hey it’s fine. I get it, daddy issues.” You nervously laughed but this seemed to strike an interest in Todoroki as he seem to have wanted to continue bashing both of your fathers until he was interrupted by Bakugou.

“You’re in my way Icy-hot.” ‘Jeez, another nickname?’ You thought.

“Then move to another side.” Todoroki quickly came back with.

This caused you to now openly give a quiet laugh, you could already tell what kind of relationship those two have. During your small laugh, Bakugou once again caught himself staring, except this time, he was caught. And it was by you.

You both made eye contact once again. As he stared into your E/C colored eyes, and you stared into his rubied gems, you both grew a slight blush on your cheeks and the 3 standing next to you both took notice.

“Hey..” you sweetly said.

“..........hey.” He replied and quickly looked away embarrassed. That peaceful little moment made your heart stir. Something that hasn’t happened in a long time. If felt calming, loving, happy...and weird and confusing. Thankfully, Dunce face came up to flip the switch.

“Wow Kacchaaannn,” the electric blonde said wiggling his brows. “Never seen you blush like that. You got a little crush on the new gir-“

“SHUT UP SPARK PLUG!” Bakugou exclaimed as he quickly made his way out of the classroom.

“Hey why you gotta be so mean all the time man!” Dunce face cried out.

“I SAID SHUT UP” Bakugou screamed from down the hall. ‘Well he certainly is interesting.....and cute’

“Ah jeez, whatever,” the blonde sighed before you seemed to have caught his attention.

“Well hey there pretty lady,” he started “I’m Denki Kaminari and you are one gorgeous girl. And you definitely got a rockin’ bod-“ he was cut off by our scary teacher.

“That’s enough Kaminari, I need to speak to L/N. Now all of you, out.” He commanded.

They all took their leave thinking about how cool and kind you were. Oh how wrong they were. The little act you put up sure was convincible. Hell, the only thing you genuinely meant was that Todoroki and Bakugou were cute and the blush that came up whenever Bakugou stared at you. You still couldn’t explain it but you brushed it off.

When all were gone, you mentally took notes of their names and possible quirks.

Izuku Midoriya. Alias: Damn Nerd and Deku. Quirk: unknown.

Ochako Uraraka. Alias: unknown. Quirk: unknown.

Shoto Todoroki. Alias: Icy-hot. Quirk: possibly related to cold and heat

Denki Kaminari. Alias: Dunce Face and Spark Plug. Quirk: possibly related to electricity

Katsuki Bakugou. Alias: Kacchan. Quirk: unknown

“L/N.” Your teacher snapped you out of your quick thought and got you focused.

“You seemed to be very comfortable with telling them about Rumor.” Mr. Aizawa said with an eyebrow raised.

“Well he is my best friend. I could go on and on about Rumor for hours if people didn’t stop me. And you can’t lie, he is pretty interesting. Especially his fighting style. You would know all about that, wouldn’t you....Eraser Head?” You said with a sinister smile.

You were well aware that Aizawa knew Rumor’s capabilities very well. You were also aware he knew much about yours too. I mean, you both have fought each other before. And one of you almost didn’t make it out alive. Hint hint, it wasn’t you.

“You are to address me as Aizawa Sensei or Mr. Aizawa, Titania.” He sternly said.

“Ouch, the villain name? I thought the past was the past. There’s a good inside me, dont you remember? You were the one who said it after all. You were even the one who recommended an S-Class villain like me should join UA.” You snidely replied.

*flashback*

As you fought against the skilled pro, you could tell he was getting weaker and weaker by the second. You used your air bending to push him back, crushing him into the wall, and keep him far away. Before you could send Rumor in to finish the job, a hand on your shoulder stopped you.

“Kurogiri? What are you doing here?” You stopped fighting and quickly turned to your superior in a fearful and shaky manner. Although you were much stronger than him and could easily take him down, you knew better. Your mind had already been so manipulated into thinking you were the weakest villain in the league, when it reality, you were strong enough to take down Shigaraki in a snap...but you didn’t need to know that.

Eraser Head, too tired and beaten to even pick himself up off the ground watched the interaction from the distance.

“You were told to collect intel, not fight a pro.” The black fog stated.

“Well yes, but he tried to stop me an-“ he silenced you with a smack to the face. Kurogiri was a respectful man...in ways...but he was just following orders on how to treat Y/N.

“If he tried to stop you, you run away.” He said, matter of factly.

“But he-“ once again, he cut you off but this time with a louder voice.

“But nothing! You were to gather intel and report back to base. Not fight. If you got into trouble, you are to run away, and use your bending and Rumor as assistance.” He stated.

“Yes sir. I’m sorry sir.” You said with your head bowed down in dishonor.

Aizawa could already tell from afar how controlled you were. In past fights, he’s noticed how you were so quick to succumb to any villain in the league, and you were always so willing to go back to them no matter how many times you could’ve ran away on your own. It was like they had something you needed, or more so it was them that you needed. For survival, perhaps?

“Did you even gather the information we needed?” Kurogiri asked.

Your silence gave him all the answers he needed. With a disappointing glare he reached for you, when you flinched at just the slighted movement, Aizawa knew something was wrong. Yes you were a villain, but it was clear you were also a manipulated child. So he acted quick, and attacked Kurogiri, knocking him out, and grabbed you. Before you both took off, you threw one of your earrings at kurorgiri’s unconscious body, knowing he’ll know what to do once he sees it. As he ran with you, he took notice of the animal behind him that followed you. When he finally landed on a cliff hanging over the city, he placed you down to sit on the grass and looked at you before speaking.

“I can see it. All of it. They’re controlling you aren’t they?” The pro-hero spoke.

“Excuse me? Nobody is controlling anybody! I choose to follow orders!” You yelled as Rumor came up to you.

“What is that thing?” Aizawa asked.

“He’s my friend and you won’t harm him!” You said while grabbing onto Rumor.

The pro took note of that word you used. Friend. Villains don’t have friends, they don’t have anybody but goons and partners in crime. Literally. You were definitely different compared to these other villains.

“I have no intentions on harming you or your friend.” The pro spoke.

“So what do you want with me.”

“....Simple. I want you to go to school, live in the dorm rooms, eat good food, train more to become better as a person and fighter, and make more friends. I see a good in you Titania, you deserve a good life. Not one controlled by villains where you do their bidding for what? Survival?” Aizawa said as he crossed his arms while looking at you.

You were in shock. He was able to figure you out. Well, he figured out why you were with the league. Survival. But it doesn’t matter, you were so brainwashed that you were convinced anyone outside the league wanted to kill you...at least that’s what the LOV told you.

“I don’t want to go to school, I want to go back home to the league.” You said while looking down and holding onto your furry friend.

“Home? UA could give you a better home.”

You looked up in shocked at his words. He wanted you to attend school at UA? You know that place. That’s the one place where the league has been so invested in ever since All Might joined the staff there. Suddenly, an idea came into thought. You knew exactly how you were gonna get into the league’s good graces and out of the cold shadow.

“UA?....That’s where you want me to go? How the hell am I supposed to get in there? I’m a known villain genius.” You sarcastically said.

“A villain hidden behind a full face mask. People don’t know your true identity, and did you ever think that maybe the league wants it that way?” He said

“Are you saying you know who I truly am?” You questioned him.

“No, but that doesn’t matter right now. If you want to go to UA, I can help you. I’m a teacher there and I can put in a good word for you. Sure it will take a lot of convincing but I’m willing to do it. Using UA as a reformatory program for you could be benefitting you in more ways than one. So if going to UA is what you really want, I’m more than happy to help you Titania.”

You couldn’t believe it. Your heart was so excited. You were finally going to get away from this horrible life of crime and killing. Away from the abuse and blood. Away from the league. But your brain was telling you to deny it all. You were safer with the league, everyone is out to get you, and you will die without the villains help. But a bark broke you out of thought.

You turned to your side to see what seems to be a smile on Rumor’s face. He was wagging his tail and sticking his tongue out while giving you puppy dog eyes. It appears he knew what was going on and he seemed excited. For your best friend, the world. So you gave in...happily.

“Y/N.” You said while getting up off the ground.

“Huh?” The pro spoke.

“My name is Y/N L/N, and I’d be happy to join UA.” You said with a smile and tears of joy filling you eyes. Rumor happily barked at the pro as well.

“Well alright then,” the pro said sticking out his hand for you to shake, “Y/N L/N, welcome to UA.”

As you shook his hand your smile held a thousand words. Happiness, excitement, villainy, and sin. Sure you were going to benefit yourself, but you were also going to benefit the league.

*Present Time*

“I was hoping I’d get more respect from you considering I was the one who got you into UA,” Aizawa tiredly said while turning his head towards the ceiling and crossing his arms. “But I guess that mischief and attitude just comes with the deal.”

“Correct.” You simply said.

“So are you willing to tell them what your “quirk” is? You seemed so open about Rumor, I thought your powers would be the same.” Aizawa pressed on.

“Not sure yet. I only just met the students. They seem nice.” You said while looking at your now very interesting shoes.

“They’re a crazy bunch, but they’re incredible friends. They could be great friends to you too Y/N.” You looked back up at him with hope, but quickly remembered why you were there in the first place.

The teacher took noticed of this and continued. “Either way, they’ll have to see what you got tomorrow. In gym gamma we’ll be doing some sparring including our quirks, so you’ll have to show them all that you can do.” He said.

He saw how that made you nervous. Not because you were scared to speak about or show your abilities, but because you knew you would be hit with thousands of questions. Oh how annoyed you must be.

“Understood.” You said to him as if you were a soldier. He won’t get used to that. He’ll have to make sure you know it’s ok to speak to people as..well people, and not like everyone is your superior.

“Good,” he began to walk to his yellow sleeping bag to pick it up, “now head to the front of the school. I left an escort for you to help guide you to your dorm room. That person will also be a guide in all things UA for you so be nice. You’ll be stuck with them for awhile. That is all, you can go now.”

As you and Rumor made your way to the front, you had so many questions going on in your mind. Should you make new friends or keep them at a distance? Should you completely drop the league and join UA? Should you blow your cover and expose why your truly there? What to do, what to do.

When you made it to the front, you finally saw your escort, and you couldn’t help but give a little smirk.

“Hey..”

A/N: If y’all wanna see the clothes that inspired Y/N’s uniform, check this out!!!

A/N: Damn guys, I know I’ve only just started writing but this is kinda the story I imagine in my mind at night. So I thought it would be fun to give it to reality. So here’s my first FanFic���� hopefully it doesn’t turn out too terrible, but I promise to work on my skills and improve. Also, if you need a reference to what Y/N’s uniform looks like, search up “Akame from Akame Ga Kill.” That’s the look that heavily inspired Y/N’s new uniform. And if you’re confused on what the boots look like, search up “Lucy Heartfilia thigh high boots,” bc those are the EXACT boots I imagine on Y/N except in a darker brunette color to match the belt. Once again, NOT spell checked so my apologies for any mistakes. I hope you enjoyed pt. 1! And if this goes well, tell me if you’d like a pt. 2! I love to hear feedback! Thx <3

[very-feral-lesbian]

i have gotten accidentally attached to the new gossip girl reboot. i just watched it originally out of boredom but i cant stop having thoughts swirl in my brain. and specifically, i have some thoughts on the aki x max x audrey relationship.

forewarning: this is just my opinion and it is very early on (?) in the series so take my opinion lightly. 

i am really hoping for a aki x max endgame, no poly ENDGAME or one of the boys with audrey. this is because i see potential for the relationship dynamic for aki x max.. let me explain. 

1. we often only see this opposite parallel dynamic in straight couples

aki and max are by no means complete opposites but for the sake of this explanation of the dynamic, just hear me out. think gilmore girls (jess and rory), friends (chandler and monica), OG icarly (sam and freddie) etc... i think the dynamic of max being the outspoken, irrational, animated, “bad” boy who conflicts with almost everyone in his life EXCEPT the calm-natured, level-headed, fly-under-the-radar guy would bring a life to queer male relationships that we don’t usually see. having aki be able calm max down but keep his hidden, more intimate personality thats still him, just more real. and then max being able to help aki see himself in a more confident light (we got a glimpse of this in 1x01 in the closet scene).

2. the way the show dealt with the aki x max and max x audrey situation

when we were told that audrey and max hooked up, it was TOLD not shown. in opposed to max and aki’s intimate moments, for which we have physically seen every single one of them. of course we saw the looks between max and audrey, and the hand on the knee thing but that also involved aki (actually even more so aki because audrey took max’s hand off of her thigh but aki didnt stop max at all, just let his hand sit there).

3. intimacy v sex appeal

there is something to say for sure about the fact that they have shown on-cam physical non-sexual interactions between max and aki and none between audrey and max. think: aki grabbing max’s jaw in 1x01 and the stare between them, the dress up/closet scene (closet also holding metaphorical value for aki’s sexuality), the thigh grab. even the non-physical intimacy, like aki taking a more confident and powerful position than is his norm and sticking up for max and his awful teacher relationship.

the interactions between max and audrey have been either entirely friendly or sexual, nothing intimate (especially since we didnt even see their sex scene or anything leading up to it)

4. stop looking for a chuck x blair replacement

while i love the first gossip girl, it was entirely straight, white, and completely lacking diversity. trying to take our current group of POCs and queer people and applying them to the straight, boring couples is doing a disservice to the diversity of the current characters. if you wanted to fit the characters into the molds, then blair would be monet and chuck would be max, but they definitely aren't getting together anytime soon.

random other thoughts/notes:

-having max being apart of aki’s identity relevation is super powerful, and i think touching on that would be awesome to see the show do (partially, because i still remember the girl who made me realize i was gay wayyyy back in the day, and i hold alot of happiness when i think of her and i hope aki can have that with max even if they arent endgame)

-THIS IS IMPORTANT: while having a pansexual character like max is amazing (like so amazing, pan representation is so important) and also having possibly bisexual aki is, im so scared that both of them will end up with women AND BEFORE YOU HATE ME PLEASE HEAR ME OUT!!!!!!! often show writes will think that just having their character be labeled bi or pan etc.. is enough and just check off the queer representation box and move on.. and then stick the characters in a straight relationship. i just really yearn for some representation for those who are in gay relationship to see their pan/bi/omni/queer identify still being represented.

-this is by no means saying i dont want drama or the poly relationship to happen. i dont think max is in a space for a monogamous relationship, he still wants to live his youth and sexual prowess. i just want some drama, possibly aki finding his footing in the queer community, some audrey/max drama, some audrey/aki drama, i want breakups, heartbreaks, relationships etcc... but i would love to see a pan man/bi man relationship because i feel like that relationship type, even within the queer community, is unexplored in media.

this was all too long and i apologize but i couldn't sleep without getting these thoughts out of my head (i have wayyy more about this show, especially them brushing off monet and her queerness and the issue with teen tv and queer women but thats a post for another day)

idk if anyone cares but yeah, im a gossip girl 2.0 stan and a aki/max stan.. thanks for listening and sorry for spelling/grammar errors, it 1 am.