#your drum solo is also perfect

[nevereverywhere]

The »The End« guitar solos or "how to subtly show your love by playing guitar together, when talking about problems is apparently not a possibility" Quotes by Geoff Emerick, sound engineer and record producer: 'I know!' he (John) said mischievously, unwilling to let it go. 'Why don't we all play the solo? We can take turns and trade licks.' Long guitar solos with dueling lead guitarists were becoming the vogue at the time, so it was a suggestion that clearly had merit. George (Martin) looked dubious, but Paul not only embraced the idea but upped the ante further still: 'Better yet,' he said, 'why don't all three of us play it live?' Lennon loved the idea – for the first time in weeks I saw a real gleam in his eye. It didn't take long for John's enthusiasm to rub off on George Harrison, who finally got into the spirit of things. John, Paul and George looked like they had gone back in time, like they were kids again, playing together for the sheer enjoyment of it. More than anything, they reminded me of gunslingers, with their guitars strapped on, looks of steely-eyed resolve, determined to outdo one another. Yet there was no animosity, no tension at all – you could tell they were simply having fun. The order was Paul first, then George, then John, and they went back and forth. They ran down their ideas a few times and before you knew it, they were ready to go. Their amps were lined up together and we recorded their parts on one track. You could really see the joy in their faces as they played; it was like they were teenagers again. One take was all we needed. The musical telepathy between them was mind-boggling. Incredibly, after just a brief period of rehearsal, they nailed it in a single take. When it was over, there was no backslapping or hugging – The Beatles rarely expressed themselves physically like that – but there were lots of broad grins. I guess there's also the possibility that, as they were performing the solo, they realized they might never get to play together again; perhaps they were viewing that moment as a poignant farewell. It was the first time in a long time that the three of them were actually playing together in the studio.

[imdead770]

Based on this post!

MDNI!

(Camp Half Blood allows phones for plot reasons)

Luke Castellan who loves the new phone policy at camp, especially when it let's him get closer to you. He loves the fact he can see you whenever he misses you, he can talk to you, but he especially loves the photos you send him.

Most of them are with innocent intent, but they drive him absolutely crazy. Like when he was training and you thought you'd send him what you and your friends were doing at the beach, getting your perfect body and cute, skimpy bikini in the shot. It sent all of his blood straight down to his dick, the rest rushing up to flush his cheeks. He knew you didn't send it thinking he'd rush to the bathroom, or that he'd get one of the most painfully hard boners of his life. He also knew you didn't think you'd get a picture in return, a picture of his cock straining against the fabric of his jeans. He knew you didn't expect it whenever he left training earlier then usual, finding you on the beach and telling your friends that someone needed you. And he knew you definitely didn't expect to get railed in your cabin while all your other friends stayed at the beach, the moans leaving your mouth to far away for them to hear.

Or

Drummer!Luke Castellan who was away on tour, both of you texting and calling each other at any chance the two of you had. It was only for a month, but you both missed each other so, so much. Soon enough you both started sending photos to each other, just to see the others face. Those sweet, innocent photos quickly turn flirtatious, but it wasn't too sexual until you sent him a picture of you draped across your bed in nothing but skimpy lingerie while he and his band was practicing.

Drummer!Luke Castellan who wraps up his solo, checking his phone, smiling whenever your contact name popped up. His smile quickly morphed, his lips now being parted, a pink blush covering his cheek bones. His band already knew what was happening whenever he rushed to the bathroom with his phone, this had happened before.

Soon he's locked in himself in the bathroom, desperately opening his camera app, already palming himself in hopes to soothe himself. He wants to call you so bad, to let you hear just how horny you've made him, but he knows that he didn't have the time, so he settles with the next best option. He sends you a picture of his cock straining against his boxers, not risking to fully show it. The big, round spot of precum in the middle is easily visible, and he quickly sends it before pulling down his boxers and bucking his hips into his fist, his eyes only remaining open so he can look at the picture you sent to him.

That picture soon joined his other picture of you under one of his drums, just incase he needed extra motivation.

[the-kr8tor]

Pin my Heart

Pairing: Hobie Brown x fem! Reader/ Spider-Punk x fem! Reader

Word count: 3.2k

Tags: Use of Y/N sparsely, no specific physical description of the reader (except for her clothing), Sexual innuendos, FLUFF.

*I don't consent to having my work translated/published on other platforms*

Main Masterlist

Thread the Needle Masterlist

PROLOGUE

Chapter 1 >>> Chapter 2

Shielding yourself from the harsh rain with your windbreaker, you bravely wade through it, with one objective - convince Hobie to be your partner and model for your final project. The entire day you've been thinking if he still owes you a favour that you can maybe cash in, and you've got the perfect one. You think at least, You never know with Hobie really. You'd think after more than ten years of being friends, you can get a read on him, but alas he's quite unpredictable, maybe that's why you like him so much, he still has a few surprises up his leather sleeves even after years of friendship.

The loud music coming from Hobie's and his roommates' garage acts as a beacon for you to follow through the downpour.

Entering the band's domain, you wave at them since they wouldn't even hear your greeting with the loud music they're playing. You watch Hobie do his guitar solo as you wrangle your wet windbreaker off you, used to the loud music, you watch his long fingers expertly play with the guitar. You catch yourself staring, so you turn around to hang your soaking windbreaker on an empty shelf, using this excuse to hide your flustered state.

Hobie finishes his solo and you turn back around, avoiding the knowing stares from his bandmates.

"There's our number one fan!" Hobie screams, his ears still ringing from the loud guitar riffs, adrenaline still rushing through him.

"Hey, everyone" you awkwardly greet.

"Hi, shy girl!" Hobie gives you a hug, knowing he's all sweaty from rocking out.

You try to avoid his hug by putting your arms towards him, "Hobie! You're all sweaty! Stop!"

"Look who's talking! You're also wet!"

"Yeah! from the rain, not sweat, asshole!" You try to push him off, but he's too strong, damn him and his strong arms.

He hugs you fully, putting all his weight on you, chin on top of your shoulder, his breath tickles the shell of your ear. "How's your day?" The ringing in his ears finally stops, and he can finally talk without screaming at you.

"It would've been good, if I didn't get Hobie sweat all over me" you huff, leaning away so that Hobie couldn't hear your heart beat quickening.

"Don't act like you don't like it, sweets" he winks at you, releasing you from his grip, but he keeps his hands on your shoulders, you're an arms length away from him. He stares at you, head tilted to the side.

Yuri, their new drummer pipes up, she clears her throat, getting both your attention from eachother. "I'm making Tea, y/n you want some?"

"Yes please, thanks Yuri" You smile at the raven haired sweetly.

They all pile out of the garage, as Hobie manually closes the gate. He reaches up to grab the handle to pull it down, his shirt rides up, you ogle at the exposed skin on his hip. For the second time that day you look away immediately, finding the discarded drum kit more interesting than Hobie's toned back.

The loud crash of the gate closing signals you to look back at Hobie. A chill runs through your body, you wrap your arms around your shivering form.

"Shit, you're gonna catch a cold, let's get you warm, yeah?" Hobie rubs your arms. He grabs your backpack from the floor, and then slings his precious guitar on his back. Hobie leads you inside the house.

The house seems to be much cleaner than the last time you visited, probably thanks to Yuri. The warm aromatic smell of the tea hits you like a truck, you sneeze at the sudden change of smell, or it might just be from the rain soaking you.

"Bless you!" Ned, the band's bassist, yells from the living room.

"Thanks Ned" You sniff.

"C'mon, let's get you dry, don't want you getting sick on me now" Hobie hugs your shoulder with his free arm.

"That was one time, Hobart" you glare at him. He snickers at your comment.

You two stand in front of his door covered in various punk band stickers. He leads you in by your shoulders, and sits you down on the bed.

"I like the new song" you say as Hobie plugs in the portable heater, then places it in front of your shivering form.

"Thanks, we've been working on it for a while" he grabs a towel from his drawer, while rummaging through it for a clean shirt, he tosses the towel on your head.

"Is this even clean?" You get a whiff of soap from the towel, answering your question.

"I'm not a barbarian" Hobie takes off his shirt, before you could ogle at him once more, instead you watch the light on the heater flicker. It's not the first time you've seen him shirtless, so why are you feeling so flustered right now? "What do you wanna do today? Can't go out though 'cause of the rain"

"Can I ask you for a favour?" You try to be blunt, so you could get it over with, wrapping yourself in the towel.

Hobie leans against the door, hands on his hips, he's now wearing a grunge long sleeved shirt that's too big on his shoulders, you see a peek of his skin from the various tears of the shirt.

"Ah, already cashing in the favour I asked you last night?" He raises his pierced brow.

"Yeahh? It's - I need your help" You look at Hobie, determination in your eyes.

"Are you in some kind of trouble? Knew you had it in you" he smirks.

"No, it's not that, I need your help for my final project"

Hobie remembers the tea waiting for you, "hold that thought" he leaves the room, you try to call him back in, but he continues towards the kitchen, you huff but you still follow closely behind. There goes the privacy of convincing him.

Yuri, Ned and their other band mate, James stop their conversation in the kitchen when they see you both walk in.

"Alright, what kind of project?" He questions your intentions, while preparing your tea, your preferred mixture practically ingrained in his mind.

You swallow your nerves, "It's nothing too big really, I - no, we need to create a look that encompasses us both, and for you to model it in front of my class?" The end of your sentence unintentionally sounded like a question.

Hobie stops from pouring milk on your tea, you can't see the growing smirk on his face. You snuggle the towel closer to you. His housemates sip their tea simultaneously.

Hobie stirs your drink wordlessly. He composes himself, turns back towards you, still stirring your drink dramatically. He looks like a Bond villain who can't wait to tell you his master plan.

"What's in it for me?" There it is. He sips your drink loudly, knowing that he's annoying you with the sound.

He doesn't even like milk in his tea, you thought, you bite your tongue from saying it out loud, you need to sweeten him up, so you try playing the nice card.

"What do you want?" Saying it through gritted teeth, trying to give him your best smile, you probably look like you're in pain though.

"Hmm, let me think" he taps the teaspoon against the mug, it clinks against the ceramic, he then brings it to his mouth with a loud slurp, releasing it with a pop. He's doing this on purpose, you cringe at the sound.

"How about I do your laundry for a month?" You negotiate.

"Nah, I can do my own laundry"

"I'll wash your motorbike every month for the rest of the year" you counter.

"Y'know I never let anyone else touch my baby"

His band mates' heads move from Hobie back to you, like they're watching a tennis match.

"Ok, um I'll buy you a new guitar then!" Gotcha you finally got him, hook, line and sinker.

Hobie hums at that "hmm, tempting, but no"

Frustrated at his lack of cooperation, "You know what fine, James," you turn towards his equally punk friend, "you wanna do it with me instead?" You should have worded that out better.

Hobie widens his eyes at the unintentional innuendo, he smiles at the opportunity, "Hey! No! I'm the only one you can do it with!"

His friends snicker, James looks at you with a slight blush on his cheeks.

"Maybe you can ask Yuri, She might be more of your type." Ned teases.

Yuri winks at you. They laugh, Hobie looks at you through his mug with a smile, watching your reaction.

"Guys, really? You're a child, Hobie" You cross your arms over your chest.

"Wait, I've got an idea" Yuri runs off to her room before you could question her.

You and Hobie stare at each other, while he drinks your tea.

"You're lactose intolerant, you're gonna shit yourself later" you grin at him.

"I have lactaid," he says matter-of-fact.

Yuri comes back and gives you a card. "Here"

"What's this? A business card?" You ask.

"Oi, are you actually trying to get a lawyer involved?"

"Yeah, a divorce lawyer, with how you both are acting like you're married" Yuri sarcastically says.

"It's a rewards card from starbucks?" You show Hobie.

Hobie comes closer to see, you both look at Yuri questioningly.

"Since Hobie here can't figure out what to ask of you in exchange for his cooperation with your thing," Yuri points to the both of you. "I figured you both need a rewards system. You poke out a hole in the card every time Hobie wants you to do something for him"

You look at the card with ten logos you can poke out, words printed neatly on top 'buy ten drinks and get a free one!' you look at the back - it expired a year ago.

"So he can ask for ten things then?"

"That's right, better than what you were suggesting, and you can keep track of it all," Yuri adds.

"Nah, I don't think this is better" Hobie declines.

"Do you have any better ideas, genius? Or do you want us to keep going back and forth" you shove the card in his free hand.

"Fine, say pretty please first, lovey" Hobie walks closer to you, the tips of your sock clad toes kisses his bare ones with how close you two have gotten. He looks down at you with a smile.

If you didn't like Hobie so much you would've asked James or any of his punk friends. Honestly you just want an excuse to spend more time with him. With how busy your schedule is, the same goes for Hobie, compared to when you were younger, you two barely hung out this year.

Hobie hopes this project of yours makes you two closer than ever, he also hopes when you finally graduate you get to finally hang out more, but it's a stretch.

You exhale, you look up at him through your eyelashes, "Pretty please, Hobie" you say sweetly. You don't break eye contact, you're not going down without a fight "with cherry on top?" You bat your lashes for added effect.

With how pretty you look up at him, Hobie's breath hitches in his throat, he tries to play it cool though, so he lightly shoves his mug on your chest, signaling his defeat.

You take the mug to your lips, and sip victoriously. You lean against the kitchen island.

"Does that mean I'm out of the picture then" James says, you all look at him unsure if he's joking or if he actually means it.

"Come off it, mate" Hobie shuts him down.

—

You're sweating bullets, wringing your fingers over the other, you wonder where in the world is Hobie? You sneak glances over your classmates and their chosen partners.

You see Flash next to a bombshell of a woman- all high heels, and manicured nails. Compared to his sporty style, he chose well. But judging from how the woman picks at her nails, and sighing every now and then, she definitely did not want to be there.

Your other classmates also chose well, the differences between their partners a stark contrast to each other.

Then there's you, sitting alone, without a partner. You busy yourself by sketching out a prototype of your project, instead of letting your thoughts freak you out.

The creaky doors open, like nails on a chalkboard. You stop in your tracks, head perking up at the sound, is it Hobie?

Your hope fades when your professor's heels echo around the room.

I'm gonna kill him, you internally curse.

Your professor looks around the room, her nose held up high. She opens her mouth to speak—

The door opens in a loud bang, the familiar leather boots strides in nonchalantly.

You would've sighed in relief, if not for Mrs. Williams glaring at Hobie.

"Sorry I'm late, teach" Hobie's hands are tucked inside his leather jacket, your professor's eyes narrow as she looks him up and down.

His eyes zeroes in your form. He smiles lopsidedly, Mrs. Williams follows his gaze, sizing you both up, she finds your pale blue cardigan a glaringly obvious difference to Hobie's leather jacket.

Noticing eyes on both of you, you give Hobie a shy smile, waving to get his ass over to your station.

The various metal on his clothes swing loudly, grabbing attention from everybody else who wasn't already looking your way. You cringe at the unwanted attention.

"Hey, love" Hobie gives his signature smirk.

"You're late!" You whisper-shout.

"Y'know how much I hate waking up early"

"It's half past eleven, Hobie"

"I'm here now aren't I?" He raises a pierced eyebrow.

You would've scolded him more if it weren't for your professor, glaring daggers in your direction.

"Looks like you all partnered up well" Mrs. Williams says plainly "ready your photographs" as she strides up to the nearest station.

"What photograph?" Hobie mimics your professor's cadence.

You elbow him to stop, just in case Mrs Williams has super hearing.

"This picture" you show him a polaroid tucked inside your sketchbook.

Hobie grabs it carefully, it shows you both two years ago, you're smiling widely right next to Hobie as he slings his arm around your neck with his guitar on his back. Hobie grins at the camera as sweat drips on his face.

He chuckles at the memory "I remember this, battle of the bands, right?"

"Yeah, your band won second place" you point at the silver trophy that Hobie's holding in the photograph.

"Should've won though" he slides the picture back to you.

"Aww, still salty, huh"

He leans on your side of the table, hand on his chin "we were robbed, lovey"

"Mmhm, sure" you tease him, even though he's right.

From your peripheral you see your professor looking in your direction.

You swallow down your anxiety, leg bumping up and down, feeling a firm hand on your thigh, you stop, looking at Hobie, a comforting smile on his lips, but all you can give him is a tight lipped smile.

He rubs comforting circles over your thigh, leaning slightly towards you to whisper "it'll be alright, it's just an introduction, you've got this" you would be flustered at the contact, but your nervousness triumphs over it. Hobie shakes your leg, taking his hand back when the professor stops on your station.

She takes one look at the both of you, eyes darting between your forms, she watches as Hobie places an arm behind your chair, smirking at the woman.

You can feel the bead of sweat falling on your forehead, hands shaking.

Mrs. Williams extends a lithe hand to you, asking for the picture on your table. You quickly hand it over, you don't want to make her wait, fumbling a bit, scared to give her a papercut.

She flips the picture to face her, you try to read her reaction, but her straight face makes it hard for you to understand her emotion.

"Good" she hands it over to you after a quick scan of the picture.

"Thank you?" You hold the picture like it's your most precious possession (it is) you can't believe that you actually impressed her, not knowing that the word 'good' is even in her vocabulary.

She moves to the next student, Hobie leans back in his chair, looking at you through his lashes "good? That's it?" He watches as you look at the picture with stars in your eyes, disbelief on your pretty face, Hobie thinks he's gonna have a lot of fun with you in this project, before you inevitably leave him for greener pastures.

He sighs, trying to dampen his thoughts, he's not ready for you to leave his side yet. You've been through thick and thin with him for more than ten years, it's hard for Hobie to think of you not by his side. He's proud of you, truly, but he can't help feeling that you're gonna leave him behind for someone better. He wants to savor every last second with you.

Hobie flicks your cheek, trying to get your attention.

"Ow, what?" You whisper-shout.

"What're you gonna do after this?"

"I don't have other classes today, I guess just go back to the dorms and design?"

"That's loser talk" he pokes your cheeks, what is up with him and your cheeks these days? "Come with me after this snooze fest"

"Where to?" You swat at his hand.

"Somewhere" Hobie shrugs, leather jacket squeaking when he moves.

"Last time you said that, I had to haul your band's equipment, while you lot were blacked out drunk"

"I wasn't blackout drunk" he mimics your voice on the last two words, "I wasn't even drinking that much"

"You introduced me to Ned, I've known him for five years, Hobs"

"So? A reintroduction doesn't hurt?" He tries to play it off, fixing the collar of your shirt.

"Just promise me it's not a pub, I don't want to take care of drunk you again"

He grabs his chest, feigning hurt "I thought you liked taking care of me?"

"I do" his heart sings, you slap your palm over his chest, Hobie's hoping you don't feel the thudding of his chest. "I just don't like getting your sick all over my new trainers"

He winces at the memory, but he bounces back immediately "yeah, but I can't help getting sick over you" Hobie casually flirts, hoping you finally get the hint, ten years isn't too late, right?

You roll your eyes, used to his flirting "stop, my classmates could hear"

"Let 'em" He leans back in his chair, mission failed, he'll get you next time.

Mrs. Williams clasps her hands, one look from her gets the entire room quiet, Hobie doesn't seem fazed though, staring directly in her eyes.

"We'll reconvene next week with your sketches and fabric samples, your partners included. Is that understood?"

A collective "yes ma'am" can be heard from her students, even some of the non-students say it. Hobie mockingly salutes in her direction, you're horrified, good thing she missed it though.

"Hobie!" You say through gritted teeth, grabbing his half raised arm.

"What? She didn't even see" he stands up, heavy boots thudding on the linoleum floors. "C'mon then" Hobie beats you to your backpack, waiting hand stretched towards you.

You hear shuffled feet, your classmates and their partners slowly file out of the room.

"Where are we going?" You narrow your eyes at him suspiciously, he's being too nice.

"Told you, somewhere nice"

"Not a pub?"

"Not a bloody pub, it's too early anyway" he flexes his fingers, beckoning you over, "don't make me exercise my rights"

You chuckle "what?"

"The bloody card"

"You want to use one, for this?" You wave the rewards card after grabbing it from your pocket "must be some place important" you tease him.

"Yes, now give me the bloody thing" Hobie snatches it from your fingers, punching out the logo, you see it float down on the table. He hands it back to you, tucking it safely inside your pocket.

"Ooohh one down nine to go" you finally stand up.

"Let's go before they close" He slings his arm over your shoulders.

"Are we taking your bike?"

"Of course, I'm not letting you ride the tube, don't worry I brought your helmet"

"You're such a softie, y'know"

"Yeah, yeah" only for you, he wanted to add, maybe next time he gets to finally say it to you.

A/N: Thank you for reading! Hope you enjoyed it, as always likes and reblogs are appreciated ❤️

*pictures above are from pinterest*

[bimbobaggins69]

𝐝𝐨𝐧’𝐭 𝐛𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐤 𝐭𝐨𝐧𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭. (ᴀ ᴄᴏʟʟᴀʙ ᴡɪᴛʜ @xxhellfirebunnyxx )

𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐝 𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫 𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐯𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐭𝐨𝐧 𝐱 𝐛𝐚𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐬𝐭 𝐟𝐞𝐦 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: you and your lovers all girls band Arwen, has gotten the opportunity to open up for corroded coffin who are said to be the next big thing. As exciting as it is, nothing excites you and your girlfriend more than the lead singer and his boyfriend.

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: eventual smut, still 18+ mdni, eventual foursome, wlw meets mlm, polyamory, lots of flirting, girls kissing, drinking, mentions of weed smoke, fluff between girls.

𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: so excited to share this collab I’ve been working on with my baby girl! Go check out her part through her readers pov on her page here <3

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 2.4k

The air is thick in the packed venue, the smell of weed and sweat fills your nose as the strobe lights from the stage beam over the crowd. You’re unusually nervous tonight, you can't tell if it’s because you haven’t yet perfected that baseline you’ve been practicing for weeks or if it’s because the stranger at the bar with the chestnut locks can’t take his eyes off of you.

From what you can tell where you're seated; he’s rather cute, with his coif of hair that swoops perfectly over his forehead, a baggy blue and white checkered flannel sits nicely over his firm shoulders. He’s nursing what looks to be a whiskey and coke as his long fingers with nails coated in black polish clutch at the glass. He gives the liquid a little swirl before he’s bringing it up to his lips, eyes still laser focused on you while he takes a sip.

“Hey baby, are you ready to start setting up?” Your girlfriend gleefully asks, her face looks so pretty with that contagious, beaming smile that instantly thwarts all the nerves running through your body. 

“Yeah pretty girl, let’s go.” You quickly reply, standing up on your platform boot clad feet and grabbing your best girl around her waist. You both excitedly bound to the double doors off the side of the stage that reads ‘bands and staff only!’. But before you pull it open, you look back to where the cute guy was seated, quickly realizing he’d gotten up and left in the time you’d been working your way backstage. A small tinge of disappointment courses through your chest, wishing maybe you and your girlfriend could have had some fun with him later, after the show. Oh well. 

Once backstage, you begin stripping off your current clothes before sliding on your pink plaid mini skirt, fastening a black studded belt over your waist, sticking a pair of black skull pasties over your nipples and slipping on some knee high black boots. 

The other three girls in your band, which consist of Gwen, your girlfriend who is a fucking beast on the guitar with a set of vocals as angelic as her. Chrissy who absolutely annihilates the drums every time, with her small frame and bouncy blonde hair and her girlfriend Rotten Robin who could melt your fucking face off with one of her keyboard solos; are all scattered around the green room, getting dressed in their stage outfits. 

You all agreed to wear skull nipple pasties, not only for the shock value but also to make a bold statement. 

“Can you help me with this?” Gwen asks, turning her back to you so you can buckle the bat harness that sits right underneath her perky tits. God, she’s so hot. You make sure to let her know as much, before throwing her a salacious wink.

After you’re ready for center stage, you and your girlfriend pull your instruments out of their respective cases, throwing the straps over your heads to rest on your shoulders and letting the hunk of wood lazily sit on your hips before you’re introduced to the crowd. 

The nerves you thought you’d halted for good earlier, come back like a rushing river, so you shake out your limbs in an attempt to set them straight again. “You good love?” Chrissy asks as she clutches her drum sticks in her dainty manicured hands before she begins twisting the right one between her fingers like the pro she is. 

“Yeah, just some pre-show jitters I guess.” You shrug, laughing off her question as if your chest wasn’t growing warm from keyed up nerves. 

“Baby, don’t be nervous, you’re going to fucking nail that baseline and everyone here is going to fucking love us. We’ve got this.” Your girlfriend reassures, batting her thick lashes at you ever so sweetly, making your heart flutter with adoration. How does she always know what to say to make me feel better? Guess that’s why she’s mine. 

“Yeah, we’re gonna kill it!” Robin chimes in as she secures her black leather fingerless gloves onto each hand. “So what if there are a couple hundred more people than we’re used to.” She continues, and you know she’s trying to be helpful and encouraging, but the thought of performing in front of more people than what is normal for you, hadn't even crossed your mind. Till now.  

“Thanks Rob.” You mumble, grabbing the neck of your bass and fidgeting with the strap as a distraction. 

“Alright, Let’s go!” Austin the stage manager announces, clapping his hands before he begins pushing you and the girls towards the stairs that lead up to the stage. 

Once you walk onto the scuffed up black platform and take your places, you realize how loud the crowd has gotten in anticipation of the opening act. It’s dark and the lights are so dim you can barely make out faces.

Chrissy enthusiastically beats her drumsticks together and shouts a three…two…one countdown, starting you all off with the opening groove. Gwen begins to strum on her first chords, the spotlights from above brighten and dance across the stage to the beat before you finally come in and hit your chords, as Robin’s insanely fast fingers move over her keyboard.  

The crowd instantly goes crazy; banging their heads, jumping and dancing, some even know all the words. But it wouldn't be an Arwen show if you and your girlfriend didn't at least raunch it up a bit by seductively dancing with your instruments. Sometimes between songs you and Gwen would even share a few tongue filled make out sessions causing the crowd to go even more wild. You both loved bringing the shock value into your live shows and the crowd was eating it up. 

As your set was coming to an end, you caught eyes with the guy who’d been checking you out at the bar. He had a mischievous smile on his face as he and the guy he was standing next to whispered back and forth into each other's ears. You felt as though he was eating you up with his eyes the way they intensely bore into yours. you carried on your set but every so often your eyes would shift and find his, making your stomach flutter with something you could only identify as intense arousal.

“Thank you guys, we have been Arwen!” Gwen shouts into the mic before grabbing your hand with a beaming smile, you both walk off the stage together, Robin and Chrissy trail behind you, hand in hand. 

“That was fucking amazing!” You jump and squeal in excitement and left over adrenaline, leaving the girls to do the same, giggling and hugging before more kisses are shared.     

“You guys that was fucking awesome! That was definitely the best show we’ve ever put on!” Your girlfriend squeaks, turning toward you and taking your face into her equally soft and callous hands. “And you absolutely nailed that baseline you’ve been working on. I told you you would.” Gwen gushes with a lustful look in her pretty eyes, a shit eating grin on her full lips as if to say ‘I told you so’. 

“Yeah, yeah…I know I should listen to you more.” You playfully roll your eyes before wrapping your arms around your girlfriend's frame, pulling her into you and planting kisses on her neck.

“I'm gonna go grab a drink, does anyone want anything?” You ask before making your exit back into the crowd. 

You walk between the bodies of people, as some type of house music pulses through the speakers, only being played until the band of the night, Corroded Coffin start their set. You notice more eyes on you than usual, some people smiling and waving or congratulating you on a ‘sick ass show’, and some with complete and utter arousal clouding their vision. You can't help but to hold your head high and embrace it, even if you're a total introvert. Gwen is the friendly talkative one in the band and you usually let her take that role as you're the observer. But it feels nice to not care for once, although you’re sure it's from the high you’re still riding from your performance. 

You quickly order, then grab your two drinks from the bar; a kahlua for you and a sex on the beach for your girlfriend per her request. You head back through the sea of people, wanting to be in the presence of your band so you can continue to rant and rave over how fucking good the set went. But you’re quickly stopped by a tap on your shoulder, as you walk through the hall that leads to the backstage door. 

“Hey.” The male voice utters, making you snap your head to the man's hand that is slowly beginning to move back down to his side, then up to his eyes. Your face definitely reads ‘why did you touch me?’ before you take in the strangers face, you quickly realize it’s the guy from the bar, who’s been eye fucking you all night. 

“Oh, hey.” You murmur with a subtle smile, not wanting to seem overzealous, although you had been thinking about the honey eyed boy all night.  

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to like, corner you or anything.” He huffs a bashful laugh, rubbing his hand on the nape of his neck out of nervousness, you couldn't help but to find it endearing. Now that he was so close to you, you were able to take in things you couldn't quite see from across the room; his silver nose ring glints under the lowlights of the corridor, he has smooth freshly shaven skin with pretty freckles, a beautiful smile even if it’s not as bright as it could be. His style is definitely more grunge then what you’re used to, all your exes were metalheads but it worked on him and if anything it made him even hotter. 

“No it’s okay.” You say, waving off his worries, Gwens drink sloshes around and falls onto the toe of your boot as you sway from side to side, making your face grow hot. 

“I just uh, wanted to say that your set was fucking great! I had a good time watching you up there. Um, you and your band.” He corrects himself instantly, causing a giggle to erupt from your chest. 

“Well thank you.” You boldly send him a wink before turning on your heel to finally head backstage. 

“Wait! Do you maybe wanna meet up later? Say like right here in this spot?” He asks, biting at his lip as his hopeful eyes beam into yours. 

“Mmm yeah, yeah that sounds good.” You murmur in agreement, finally opening the door and heading inside. 

“I’m Steve by the way!” He yells as the door closes behind you, making you smile at his awkwardness. 

Once inside you begin looking for your girlfriend, her drink now a little more than watered down from the melted ice. 

“Hey Chris, have you seen my girl?” You ask Chrissy who is splayed out on the black, cracked leather loveseat with a wet towel rolled up and placed over her forehead. The petite blonde is always the first to tap out after every show, but she really does put all her energy into playing so you couldn't blame her for wanting to nap after such an intense performance. 

“Uhhh, I think she went out to look for you babe.” Chrissy says with a tired smile, “I’ll be here if anyone needs me!” She shouts, as you walk back out the doors you came in, before giving her a quick ‘shit, thanks’. 

For a third time tonight you walk out of the double red doors and back into the muggy air and throng of people, on a mission to find your girlfriend and the owner of the drink that has made your hand uncomfortably sticky. 

Finally, after walking circles around the auditorium that seemed more like a damn arena than a small concert venue, you spotted Gwen, of course in the middle of the crowd being the little social butterfly you love so much. She was still adorning her performance clothes with her black leather skirt, fishnet top, harness, pasties and boots. She had a huge content smile on her face when her eyes caught yours, waving you over with excitement. 

“Oh my god babe!” She shrieks with a cute giggle. “I was just talking to the literal hottest guy! I have to find him.” She beams looking over the mass of people, but eventually looking disappointed when she came up short. 

“Wait, I just talked to the hottest guy, too.” You say with a disbelieving laugh, as your eyes begin to search the crowd for your mystery guy.

“And for the moment everyone’s been waiting for…Corroded Coffin!” The announcer on stage shouts out at the crowd making them jump and scream with anticipation. 

You and Gwen’s eyes immediately snap forward, you had never actually seen what the guys from Corroded Coffin looked like so out of curiosity you both turned to the stage, not wanting to miss the long awaited show. 

Once the music starts playing and the lights begin to brighten up the stage, you and Gwen gasp. 

“Oh my god, that’s the guy!” You both shout in unison. For a second you thought you were talking about the same person until your girlfriend started raving about his long flowy hair and nipple piercings, making you slowly realize she had talked to the lead guitarist. Yeah he was really hot, too.

Steve ripped his flannel off mid chorus, showing off his buff arms and littering of tattoos across his tanned skin, his alice in chains shirt stuck to him like a second skin as his hands gripped the mic, making his arms flex and you swoon. 

“That’s the guy I talked to!” You shout over the music as you point to the lead singer, Gwens eyes widen in amusement.

“Steve?!” Robin asks as she walks up from behind you, a dumbfounded look on her face. 

“Yes Steve, do you know him?” You ask curiously, taking a sip of your drink before handing the other off to its rightful owner. 

“Thanks peach.” Your girlfriend says before giving you a quick kiss. 

“Yeah, he’s one of my best friends and he’s dating Eddie, the guitarist.” She divulges, pointing to the wild haired, tattooed man who’s right in the middle of an amazing guitar solo, that made you and your girlfriend's thighs visibly clench. 

“No way?!” Gwen guffaws, you can tell by the look in her eyes that she has an idea cooking up, and you're equal amounts excited and slightly scared. 

“Oh this is gonna be fun.”  

[kneelingshadowsalome]

Hello! I’ve been back and forth on writing you this bc I’m nervous but eh fuck it, I have no shame. So first off, I just want to say that you, Salome, are an absolutely stunning and brilliant writer. As someone who majored in classical studies in college, I was completely blown away by Fatum Nos Iungebit. The world you built was so deeply immersive and characterization of König, in that story as well as your other headcanons, is perfect. For the past week or so, I’m going to be honest, I’ve been going through your blog because I’ve been so hungry for more and the only reason I haven’t interacted more is that 1. I don’t wanna feel like a creep and 2. I was so scared of you blocking me for ‘’spam-liking” or whatever. I can assure you that I am a real person and I’ve been enjoying everything I’ve seen. I came across one concept however, that definitely got my neurons firing and that’s the idea of belly dancer reader x könig and I have some thoughts I wanted to share with you if that’s okay. :)

So I’ve been a belly dancer for almost a decade (I actually celebrate my ten year anniversary next year!). I was part of a belly dance performance troupe at my old university and I currently dance with a studio in my new city. It’s genuinely one of the great passions of my life. I’ve performed at all kinds of venues and for all different occasions from festivals to galas to charity events to hookah bars, so I definitely have some performing experience under my belt, well as what audiences are like. So when I saw the idea of König being mesmerized by a dancer at a wedding, I went !!!

I want to add the caveat that this is based on my experience as a dancer living in the US, and while I’ve performed for SWANA audiences (which is always an amazing experience 🥰) and non-SWANA audiences, I can’t speak for what it’s like in other countries. So, in my ✨personal✨ experience as a belly dancer going on a decade, it’s pretty rare that men will approach dancers during or after a performance—especially to actively hit on her. And believe it or not, it’s because many of them are actually intimidated! I have seen the most seemingly cockiest, proudest men just stare blankly and stand back while we do our thing. If anything, it’s usually women who approach us, gushing about our performances or asking where they can take classes and stuff. Women tend to be the first ones to get up and dance with us, shower us with tips, etc. (again, very much my personal experience as someone living in the US). When it comes to more family-friendly events like weddings and stuff, we also get a lot of kids approaching and that’s always so adorable and sweet—especially when the little babies think we’re princesses. 😭

So back to König, especially Y!König. 😈 he’s at the wedding. He’s mopey. He’s picking at his plate of chicken and rice. He’s happy for his friend and his bride, but a little bitter and jealous that he’ll never get to be that happy. Then, a mejance (essentially an entrance/overture piece of music) swells over the speakers and out comes the dancer, adorned in an Irina Sheyner number (she’s an absolutely STUNNING costume designer, plsplsplsPLS look her up 😭), veil flying behind her. She does her mejance, a drum solo, and at some point…she does a sword number. The level of control she has to be able to balance the sword on her head in impressive, but König can’t help but imagine what it would be like for to dance wielding his knives in hand. Finally, dancer opens up the floor and in typical faction brings out the bride and groom to dance with her, and then most of the other guests follow. Not König though. He hangs back and watches as this beautiful dancer holds the guests in the palm of her hand. Gone is the cocky, brutal soldier, and only the shy, anxious boy remains, the one who would always be left out of games at recess and who wasn’t invited to birthday parties. König has never been the dancing type, but he can’t even bring himself to offer her a few of the banknotes or dollars or whatever currency he’s using. He just stares, and she’s completely oblivious.

A while later, he’s getting ready to leave, when he spots Dancer. Her makeup and hair still done up, but she’s now fully cloaked and awkwardly lugging her suitcase and bags full of props and other equipment across the poorly paved parking lot. König zeroes in on her and before he knows it, he’s approaching her, asking her if she needs help carrying her stuff. Dancer, surprised but this gigantic man suddenly appearing before her, flashes a winning smile at him and says he can. König easily lugs the stuff to Dancer’s car. She thanks him profusely and just like that, she drives away.

It’s only a few hours later that the obsession starts to creep in. König, who’s ordinarily not a big social media user, is now checking the feeds and stories of his friends who attended the wedding. Finally, he comes across one friend who posted a video of themself with the dancer and tagged her Instagram. König can’t click on it fast enough and suddenly, he’s greeted by dozens of images and photos of Dancer. Some are adorably mundane. He finds out that Dancer teaches classes at a studio nearby, and some of the videos consist of dancer teaching basic moves to the camera. There are other videos of her at the local hookah bar, where she performs on a regular basis. König sees one particularly video of Dancer doing a piece of floor work, that same sword balanced proudly on her head as she’s propped back on her arms, her gorgeous hips undulating toward the sky. König feels a dark wave of heat wash over him. He jokingly thinks to himself that maybe he should take up hookah. But one thing is for certain, she’s going to be his one day. He’ll just have to be sneaky about it, subtle.

He clicks the follow button on Dancer’s instagram. She has a few thousand followers. Surely she can’t notice one faceless profile, right? 😈😈😈😈😈😈

Anyway, that’s all I have for now. I know you’re taking a break from fics but if you see this I want you to know you’re an amazing writer. Lots of love! 💖💖💖💖

Ughhh and another lovely soul 😭💗 I don't know what's going on in here this week but both you and anon have really made my heart swell!

And please please please, spam liking is never frowned upon here (I don't know why anyone would block someone who's clearly not a bot for loving your stuff?!) It's such a delight if I see that someone has liked a ton of things instead of just one. It's the highest compliment and praise! ❤️🥺

And your bellydancer prompt/drabble is so mouthwatering, god. If I'm being honest, I'd read whatever you wrote for this thing in a hot minute because you have the skill and you've done the research (an actual bellydancer in my inbox?! Ok Salome try not to be a creep) and the premise is just. GAH. So good, especially with yandere König! ❤️❤️❤️

I have to reveal I wrote like 8 chapters of a story relatively close to this in the fall: Stalker!König obsessing about reader, invading her DMs on Instagram and literally stalking her. She's not a bellydancer, but damn if I didn't think about changing her into one... :) The story is on hold for now, but here is a little snippet as a thank you gift!

CW: Yandere/Stalker!König, harassing, obsessive behavior

I’m sorry, Liebling. You were too beautiful yesterday. I got carried away.

You wake up just to see that your phone is full of messages. From him, of course. He’s created another account on Instagram.

I’m just a man.

You ignore it altogether, even if there’s messages and emails from other people too. You simply go to brush your teeth, hearing how the phone buzzes on your desk.

I know it was disrespectful. I could never call my wife that. Will you forgive me?

You sigh and finish with your morning routine, but the phone buzzes again.

I sent you flowers. Did you get them?

It’s like he knows when you’re awake, because you can see the messages from your screen without having to unlock it. Even if he refreshed your conversation every minute, every second, he can’t possibly see that you’ve seen them yet.

It bugs you to no end, this feeling that he somehow knows that you’re awake. It’s like he knows your every move. It’s the most unnerving thing, and makes you think about horrible scenarios where he has broken into your house while you’re at work, to install cameras or microphones or something. You feel like you’re about to go mad if this nightmare goes on.

You go to the front door, but hesitate a while before you turn the knob.

What if it’s a trap?

What if he wants to kill you because you yelled at him last night at the pub...? What if there’s a bomb or something that goes off when you open the door, what if he aims at you with a gun from across the street and kills you on your doorstep this morning?

Just what the actual fuck does this guy even want with you...

You sigh with a broken heart and some broken nerves, deciding it’s as good a way to go as any. You turn the knob and open the door, only to find the usual porch, and a large bouquet of dark red roses planted there.

More ice sinks into your stomach as you witness the evidence of him knowing where you live. But the fact that he chose to send red roses… Ugh, this guy is so old-fashioned and so unimpressive that it’s somewhat a dull surprise to actually see flowers on that porch.

Who buys red roses these days?

Couldn’t he have picked peonies or something, something to go with your other decor… Red roses are so eighties, so funeral-like, so boring.

You sigh and go and take the flowers to the trash. Then you walk back to your house, make sure the door is locked tight, and go back to your phone to type a message.

Did you see that?

The answer arrives immediately.

What? ❤️

I threw your flowers in the trash.

There’s bit of a pause after that. Your wannabe boyfriend clearly hasn’t got his eye on you at every given moment. That’s a bit of a surprise, almost a disappointment, actually. But only if you were any more crazy.

The reply comes after about 30 seconds, after a series of Typing… bumping up and down on the screen.

I’m sad.

You get some satisfaction from that, but the first reaction is a tiny, tiny dagger to the heart. You sigh – you do nothing but sigh these days – not only because of his message, but also because you can’t seriously be having a moment of compassion for your stalker, for god's sake.

You make me sad, Liebling 💔 Are you still angry with me?

You throw the phone away and go to make yourself some breakfast, only to stop and turn when you hear the phone buzz again.

I’ll send you more flowers.

Jesus…

You unlock the screen in a frenzy and type a reply in mere seconds.

Don’t bother. I’ll throw them in the bin too.

Typing…

You have to keep them at some point. Trash bins get full so soon.

STOP HARASSING ME.

You throw the phone away for good this time, and don’t come back to it for another hour. You eat your breakfast with squirming insides and a rattled heart, waiting for someone to come bring you flowers at any given moment.

But no one ever comes.

You check your phone before going to work, but there’s nothing from him there. You go and block his new profile, unsurprised to see that there are no pictures this time, not even a profile picture (well, there is one, but it’s only a black circle), just in case. You don’t know why you didn’t block him in the first place.

There’s a radio silence for a few days. You spend them at the edge of your seat, with lots of trouble sleeping, but soon start to ease into the fact that maybe he finally had enough. Maybe you were not as interesting or attractive as he thought when he met you in person…

Wait, what?

Gosh, you can’t be this desperate... You simply can’t. This has to end.

You don’t talk about him in therapy, mainly to convince yourself that you’re not thinking about him at all. You’re not missing him harassing and stalking you, and you’re not disappointed that he didn’t send you enough flowers to fill your entire bin.

You know you should address this: this crazy need to be something groundbreaking to someone. To want someone to be this obsessed with you, no matter how sick that someone was. You know you would have gone to the police if your stalker was the sleazy, weak-wristed man from the pub. You would’ve packed your bags and moved houses already, changed your name and closed your social media accounts, quit everything if your stalker was small and ugly and weak.

But now that you know he’s relatively good-looking, does something dangerous and has a lot of money, and looks like he could fuck and fight half the city by himself, you’re not in that much of a hurry to go to the authorities.

You’re even a bit sad that your stalker hasn’t given you any fevered attention these past few days... He hasn’t even asked you how you’ve been.

No one has asked you how you’ve been: no one ever does. You have to wade through this life all by yourself: depressed and anxious and crazy. Lonely… And horny.

Gods, you just want someone to hold you at night… Someone strong, and big, someone who would pay a few bills for you, take care of you and give you a round of good sex…

Your phone buzzes from time to time, but there’s no message from him. One night before going to sleep, relatively early, so early that it could be called the bedtime for old spinsters, you break down and cry a little. It’s not a wail: only a soft little sob, a few sniffles and a couple of tears until your nose gets clogged and the pillow is wet.

Your phone buzzes, and you reach for it, feeling so, so pathetic when you hope it would be him.

And the message is from him.

You’re the most beautiful woman on this earth. I know I fucked up. I’m just a horny dog and I don’t deserve you.

You sniffle and rise to sit, your whole system fully awake now. Oh god... You’re so fucked.

The message makes you feel incredibly good and sweet, almost giddy. It feels like he’s kneeled right there in front of you, like a knight who has misbehaved in the throes of his lust. You know it’s ridiculous, but you start to smile a little, and the tears dry on their own. The merry feeling is followed by righteous rage, a little fit, because he’s made you wait for days, he’s tortured you in every way possible, and he does absolutely nothing right.

You unlock the screen and start to type, not thinking it through at all before hitting send.

That’s right.

Fuck… Shit. That was a mistake. No, a huge error.

Why did you have to send that? Stooping to his level, sending stupid things like that…

You put the phone away quickly, then reach for it again to delete what you just send. But it’s too late.

I can be a good dog if you forgive me.

The message is waiting for you already, and when you don’t reply, the oppressive, ominous Typing… hits on the screen once more. God, how could you be so stupid…

I’ll kill anyone you need me to kill. I'll give you money, whatever you need. A new kitchen so you can cook me something nice? I’ll be a good dog, I promise.

What did you even expect?

Everything always blows up when you give him attention: any dumb person knows better than to give this hungry dog a bone. You’re just too fond of digging your own grave, it seems.

There’s no end to the messages: this guy starts typing a new one every time he has sent the last.

I’ll fuck you like a good dog too….

You lean your forehead to your palm, trying to figure out a way to stop this.

And then–

Fuck, now I’m hard

You take a quick breath of air and put the phone away.

Please don’t send a dick pic, please don’t send a dick pic…

The phone buzzes.

Look how hard you make me

There’s a picture attached, but you can’t see it when the screen is locked.

This is what I have to live with, day and night…

Message after message, your phone buzzes, and you check them quickly from your screen, swearing to yourself that you’re not going to give him the satisfaction of opening the conversation and checking the image he sent you. You know perfectly well what you will find if you do that.

But after only a minute or two, you unlock the phone, and open the conversation with your heart ramming in your chest.

Just one quick look...

[maybeasunflower]

Star Trek theme tunes: worst to best

Star Trek’s many TV series each have an opening sequence that attempts to set up the viewer for the show ahead. A good theme tune delivers a high-quality piece of music that encapsulates the show’s essence — and it is on this basis that I’ve ranked the themes. What isn’t included in my ranking is anything about the graphics that accompany the music, nor the show itself. Naturally, these are all purely my personal opinions, so there can be no argument.

Let’s get started!

11: Enterprise

“It’s been a long road…” are five words that launched a lot of strong feelings — and rightly so. The jarring mismatch between everything about this song and everything Enterprise was about relegates this theme to the bottom of the heap. The opening graphics are spot-on for the show’s premise — but I never got to watch them because I needed to skip the music, and that makes me madder.

If you want to know what could have been, search YouTube for “Star Trek: Enterprise Opening Credits with Archer’s Theme”. That music is perfect for the show: slow, dramatic, building up for the big reveal. Then finish weeping / gnashing your teeth and come back here.

This theme also meant that we can never have a Star Trek theme with words again, ever, because we have been all primed to hate such things because of Enterprise — and that’s sad.

Imagine if we’d had a good theme with words that we could all sing at appropriate and inappropriate occasions.

10: The Animated Series

You’d forgotten about this series, hadn’t you? I will confess I haven’t watched any episodes (unlike the other ST series), but that doesn’t me having an opinion about the theme music. The jaunty theme music. The theme music that speaks of hijinks and hilarious consequences. The theme with super precise drumming — the perfect accompaniment as we join our hero sipping a cocktail in his usual bar by the beach.

Wait, this show is about space exploration?

9: Discovery

Open with Those Four Notes (good), wistful hunting call horns (good), build up to a climax (good), and then… umm…

What follows musically reminds me of Fringe (a great show that also involved Alex Kurtzman and Robert Orci as creators). Fringe was a show about the discovery of new scientific things (and the consequences thereof)— but Discovery is not. The stories of Discovery revolve around battling against various things. The main theme (minimalist repeated eighth note patterns with a slow-moving melody) simply doesn’t speak to premise of the show. It ends with the ascending “Star Trek motif”, but it just feels like something bolted on to end things.

This is a theme based on the title, not on the events in the show.

8: The Original Series

I’m going to get some flak for this, but I don’t care. Yes, The Original Series is sacred. Yes, this theme gave us Those Four Notes right at the start. Yes, it gave us the classic opening words. Yes, we must remember TV was different back then when judging TOS. But I’m ranking the music, and so that’s all that matters.

This is a show about exploring strange new worlds and going boldly. The music is not that. The music is about going somewhere on holiday in your 1960s convertible, or possibly going home from work for the weekly comedic capers. It’s not going boldly anywhere, it’s not exploring new worlds, and that’s final.

… I am going to get so much flak for this.

7: Picard

This is a theme unlike any other, but this a series unlike other, so that’s OK. The wistful main melody on solo cello works for the show and its premise. The theme then gets musically developed by other instruments in a musically satisfyingly way.

However, two-thirds (!) of the title graphics are consumed by the 137 producers, supervising producers, co-executive producers, executive producers, and producing producers — and it feels the music had to be extended by a good 30 seconds to cover them all. Like Discovery, it ends with ends with the ascending “Star Trek motif”, but it (just about) feels musically connected to what came before.

Overall, I am left with a very neutral opinion. There’s nothing that bad about this music, but nothing that makes it stand out.

It’s boringly OK.

6: Strange New Worlds

After the classic opening words, the dramatic bass line/repetitive strings/drums kick in, the music builds, everything’s set up for the main melody…. and what’s that? Well, you can’t hear that melody because the orchestration that gives it insufficient body, and the sound mix gives the accompanying dramatic bass line/repetitive strings/drums far too much prominence.

The overall structure is good — repeat the main melody with some extra oomph, transition to the B melody, build to a climax with some block chords, then bring every down nicely with the hunting horn call. It ticks all the boxes on (manuscript) paper — but the orchestration and mix just means I can’t enjoy it properly.

Give the melody some more body, turn the volume down on the rhythm section, and this theme would jump up a lot of places.

5: Deep Space 9

DS9 isn’t about going boldly anywhere, but it is still about dealing with dramatic, important things. The music has a stately beauty that reflects both those things. The opening lonely horn illustrates the emptiness of space, before being joined by more horns to build drama. Then the main melody kicks in over a minimal accompaniment, raising the hairs on the back of my neck. There’s a pedal note that sustains through most of the opening — so that when the bass finally moves, it makes for a dramatic conclusion.

Later seasons brought a new version that tried to punch up the excitement a notch by increasing the speed of the main melody and adding some more texture to the accompaniment — but at the cost of the stately beauty that is this theme’s best feature. Let’s ignore it.

The title sequence is about 30 seconds too long, which means the beauty has faded somewhat by the end. (Yes, the opening for Strange New Worlds is a similar length, but the music doesn’t kick in until after 30+ seconds).

Overall, a solid piece of music that aligns well with the show’s premise.

4: Lower Decks

Lower Decks is a show that is both 100% serious and 100% affectionate parody. It does everything any other Star Trek TV series does, while turning it up 11 in order to skewer those things. Musically, that’s a tough premise for a theme tune.

So what happens? We open with Those Four Notes, followed by hunting horn calls, then a dramatic main theme on trumpet that’s repeated on all the strings — followed by gear-changing chords into the real main theme. A theme that gets a full-bore orchestra with a melody on brass that descends like someone resigned to not doing first contact (no hopeful ascending motifs here!). Then a solid build-up brings it to a satisfying conclusion.

Like the show, this theme works both seriously and as affectionate parody.

3: Voyager

The show has a tension between “let’s get home as soon as possible” and “ooh, new alien planet to explore” — and the music reflects that.

The theme opens with muted trumpets on a lonely motif (plus timpani) at the start to bring a sense of the dramatic, but without wanting to shout too loudly about it in this unknown part of the galaxy. The main theme on the horns is repeated with added texture and followed by a B melody on strings. Both bring a sense of the long journey ahead, with an ebb and flow throughout.

A slow build-up is then followed by a gentle climb back down — then a rapid (and musically seamless) build up to an emphatic restatement of the opening motif, ringing out to remind us this isn’t just about skulking back to Earth.

Voyager may be headed for home, but it’s still boldly going new places.

2: The Next Generation

Whatever you feel about Star Trek: The Motion Picture, we can all thank it for this music. TNG opens with Those Four Notes on something ethereal, followed by the best delivery of the classic opening words (sorry Anson Mount!) with a hunting call on horns underneath—then we’re into music about exploring strange new worlds and going boldly. It’s going on an adventure — journeying to places unknown to find things unknown.

Structurally, it’s simpler than other themes: after the main melody on brass, we get the string-heavy B melody twice, then back to a shortened version of the main melody to end. However, the post-words music only takes up half the opening, and those two melodies have enough going on to sustain our interest.

You’re left excited about what’s going to happen this week— because we’re exploring, damnit.

1: Prodigy

Four chords build tension, launching into drums+ostinato that tell you right away that exciting things will be Going Down.

Dramatic trombone and bells set up a musical cadence that gets resolved into the start of the heart-stirring main melody soaring out on horns clearly over the accompaniment (take note, SNW). The main melody repeats with added trumpets, and transitions into the drum-less B melody on lush strings that tells you it’s also about the journey. Then bridge into a repeat with everything turned up a notch.

Things get a little chaotic for a moment (what else do you expect with this crew?), but it’s OK, because we’re back to those dramatic trombone and bells (plus friends) to bookend things and lead us into a final resolution… that leaves just enough going on afterwards to accompany Those Four Notes, as though that was the plan all along. Then spike the ending so there’s no doubt we’re done.

Perfect.

[crying-screaming-throwingup]

my thoughts on prelude to ecstasy:

the intro orchestral movement?? it felt like something out of a roman period piece. it was so perfect and just *chefs kiss* and the ending crescendo was so gorgeous

burn alive felt so dramatic like watching the lead up to a murder “let me make my grief a commodity” and “there is candle wax melting in my veins” are just such poetic lyrics. the guitar riff during the verse feels like a warning- eerie and stark. “i am not the girl i set out to be” is such a raw line it makes me feral omfg. abigail morris’ final line felt like an open wound

i’ve heard caesar on a tv screen before but in the context of the album as a whole changes it. it’s almost like a sequel of sorts, showing what she “set out to be”. musically, the contrast between the verse and chorus itches a scratch on my brain. “champion of my fate” feels so spiteful idk why

the feminine urge gives lana vibes maybe cause of the darker imagery and tone. it feels like a performer cracking their mask. “i am a dark red liver stretched out on the rocks” is sUCH A GOOD LYRIC. “to nurture to wounds my mother had” killed me my god

again i’ve heard on your side before but the album changes the feelings within it. if the feminine urge was the cracking of the mask then this song is the removal of it. it is vulnerable and raw and open about love and shame. the vocals feel like they’re pleading but already resigned- it’s heartbreaking

the flute opening for beautiful boy sounds so wistful. this so is so queer omg. “what good are red lips when faced with something dark” the lone piano chords in the chorus plus the harmonies are so ethereal they make me feel like i’m at my funeral service.

gjuha makes me feel like i’m intruding on something private, a ritual between a girl and a god. THE TRANSITION OMFG

the placement of gjuha before sinner MAKES ME FEEL THINGS OMG. like the contrast of imagery, between sin and holiness. “TURN TO THE ALTAR OF LUST” this song made me feral when i first heard it and it makes me feral now like omg. the religious imagery in this entire album is so interesting

my lady of mercy’s bass line is so groovy and perfect and amazing. and the percussive claps are so amazing. again, this so is so queer��️. the heavier sound in the chorus is so amazing and the bridge makes me feel like i’m fighting my final stand and praying to win

i love the stripped back piano of portrait of a dead girl compared with my lady of mercy. even further in the track, it remains kinda mellow and softer but no less direct. “the dignity of letting me go” when it finally gets more upbeat it the chorus it rly doesn’t disappoint. and the strings omg. also song title could be a nod to the album cover or vice versa??

the beginning of nothing matters feels like a prayer and the harp is so bloody good. “a sailor and a nightingale dancing in convertibles” the guitar riffs in the second verse are so funky i love it and the solo just makes me want to dance.

mirror feels like the end of the battle- the drums and solemn voice. it’s the end of the performance, the final death. “pretty glass and empty heart” death of the performer is the death of the album. but the final fifty seconds feels like a rebirth in a way, growth and renewal.

i don’t know if u could tell but i fricking loved this album like it’s everything i’ve ever wanted in terms of vibes and blend of dramatics and sincereness. i’m just praying that i get tickets omg

[lanadelray-gurl]

''My heart is, and always will be, yours''

Singer!Austin butler x Bandmate!fem!reader

Warning: Angst,fighting,cussing,hidden love,fluff,soft smut,p n v,fingering,biting,crying,falling in love(really a friends/enemies to lovers kind of thing)

Summary: you and Austin had started a band with a few other friends back in high school.You played bass and he play guitar,you both sang together. But what happens after you start to fall in love with him but his new found fame has gotten to his head?

You had always been interested in music,you grew up with it. Your mom played the piano and your father played the bass which he would go on to pass down to you,you didn’t have a club for music in your high school so you decided to make a post on your facebook(gosh you feel old looking back on this) you made a small post to your 20 friends on Facebook. It read;’Do you like music? Do you like making music? Can you play an instrument but simply can’t find anywhere to play? Well please send me a message if you’re interested in a music club after school at my house!’ You sounded desperate,,which was the case. See you always wanted to start a band,your dad did when he was your age and you decided fuck it why not! That’s when you met him. Him being Austin,at first you thought he was cute,he had nicely styled dirty blond hair,pretty blue eyes and he was tall. And did I mention he could sing AND play guitar. Yeah..he was perfect.

When you first talked or Austin he had messaged you on Facebook,you didn’t even know he went to your school! You barely paid attention to your surroundings in school,either writing stupid songs or drawing little things in your notebook. He told you he was very interested in your ‘club’ and even sent a video of him playing the acoustic guitar and singing an Elvis song! It was a bit old school but you sighed it,he told you he could pretty much play any song you wanted him to. He also added that he had a few friends who also went to your school who’d be interested. One being named Adam;he was your age and played drums. Then you had Johnny; he was a few years older and played rhythm guitar. It was perfect what could go wrong!

Apparently everything could go wrong—

Well not necessarily for the whole group,it seemed to just be you. It’s been a few years now,you and Austin had been posting your music (which was mostly covers of really popular songs) to any platform out there! And it gained a lot of traction,you both really enjoyed it,as time passed you guys went a recording studio,produced your own music,posted it and the next week you were approved by a big record label. You all of course said yes,you could see the vision,your name in lights. Well your bands name;Ecstasy (can you tell I got lazy) Your bands music was mostly sensual and meaningful. That’s how you saw it,but it started to look like all of the bands hard work was just a money grab for the rest of your band.

As the years went on you and Austin grew close,you were completely smitten by him. You tried to make all of his ideas for songs come true..even if they sucked. But he didn’t see you like that,you wrote the songs,play the bass and they get money. Which hurt you once you realized. As things progressed you noticed how at every show and on every tour he was with a girl or at least flirting with the girls in the crowd. If hurt you but you couldn’t say it,you had even thought about leaving the band or even going solo but you didn’t want to be selfish. You stayed quiet,Adam and Johnny took notice to your change in personality. Your once bubbly and excited personality had turned kind of dark and closed off,no one could tell what was wrong because you just kept to yourself if you weren’t making music. Sometimes you’d be pretty happy during rehearsals or before recording but somehow Austin brought your mood down.

He’d constantly bring a girl or two to everything the band went to. Didn’t matter if it was private or if it was just a casual hang out. It was to say the least embarrassing and you let it go on for years now. Why couldn’t you stick up for yourself?! God..it was pathetic. You just ignored it at this point,you were emotionally numbed at least that’s what you thought until your most recent show.

Your band was preparing for a show,you kept quiet the whole time. Austin noticed this,even thought it’s been going on for so long he finally noticed your change in personality. He grabbed your shoulder gently,you were grabbing your bass from its case you looked back at him and gently shrugged him off of your shoulder.

“Hey man what’s going on with you..?” He spoke with a bit of force. You looked back at him,you were wearing an amazing outfit,you were wearing a tight black dress with fishnets and combat boots and he took notice..when did you become so pretty? You had beautiful makeup but he could see your eye bags and just how tired you looked. You spoke,your once soft and sweet voice was now slightly rough and scratchy “nothing..just let’s get ready..” you walked towards the stage everything was ready for the show to start,Austin followed close behind you. Tonight was gonna be stressful..

You were nearing the end of the show,you played your heart out,so did the whole band. It was time for your biggest song. This is where you and Austin got really close and just made it seem like everything was sweet and beautiful but it was farm from it. As the song played you felt tears stinging your eyes.(listen to the song above now!!)

“Without shame..”

His voice was smooth and beautiful god why were you so in love with him? It hurt your very soul.

“Two outfits then to my name..”

It was almost time for you to join in,you didn’t know if you could do it. This song was about love but you knew he didn’t love you..and that was so painful.

“You’d end up in one when you’d stay..”

You felt your heart start to race,you walked towards the microphone,standing right next to him. His hands stringing the guitar skillfully. That both turned you on and made you sick. You wanted those hands around you but every other girl got what you wanted.

“We had no where to go..and every desire for going there..”

You began to sing with him,he glanced at you. Your voice was beautiful to him,and once the fans heard you sing they went crazy they loved your voice and something inside him suddenly felt connected to you. His heart began to race.

“I heard once..it’s the comforts that makes us feel numb” You both continued to sing together for the next few moments,your voice made him shiver and his made you wince from the pain from the heart break. “We’d go out with no way to get home..and we’d sleep on somebody’s floor..wake up feeling like a millionaire..” you both continued to sing your heart out,you both looked up and stared into each others eyes. You felt emotions take over you. Austin and the rest of the band could tell you were bubbling with emotion. About to burst whenever you were tipped over the edge and the intensity of the eye contact was what tipped you over. “Wish I’d known it was just our turn..(we just got by)..Being blamed for a world we had no power in..(but we tried)..” Johnny and Adam joined in for a few parts now,giving the song an angelic sound,but your voice seemed to over power them.

“You and I had nothing to show..(we didn’t know)..But the best of the world in the palm of our hands..(anything,darling)” You felt the tears fall down your cheeks,you were now staring to the floor trying not to let your emotions get the best do you,Austin noticed this. He felt a stinging in his heart why did he suddenly care so much..? “And,darling, I haven’t felt it since then..I don’t how the feeling ended..” Your voices cracked slightly,the crowd roared happily but your band knew it was a sign of you losing yourself to you emotions,Austin almost lost his breath. You had raw talent and hearing you putting your real emotions into this certain song made his chest almost cave.

“But I know being reckless and young..Is not how the damage gets done..” You continued to cry as you sang,it was heartbreaking to watch but the fans didn’t care they just wanted to hear you sing with Austin. But now that he kept thinking about you and your new persona he felt a connection of heartbreak with you but why? He maybe thought it was just heartbreaking to see you cry because he was perfectly fine..or at least that’s what he thought. “One time we would want for nothing..(one time we had it all,love).. We knew what our love was worth (when we had nothing)..” you looked up to the sky for a few seconds,your eyes locked with Austin’s once more. He was caught off guard for a moment,you noticed this and felt a since of pride but this.

“..Now we're always missing something (I miss when).. I miss when we did not need much..” Austin backed away from the microphone,he continued to play the guitar. You grabbed the microphone and stared to sing your solo part,you took a deep breath and closed your eyes tight as you put your heart into this part.

“Oh,if the car ran,the car was enough..If the sun shone on us,it’s a plus..and the tank was always filled up! Only enough for our getting there..” Tears streamed down your face as you kept your eyes closed tightly. You opened your eyes finally and looked around and watched as Austin came back to the microphone to end the song and then the show.

Finally once you finished that song you all waved to the fans and you rushed off stage,wiping your tears and sobbing as you put your bass back in its case. You wiped off your messed up makeup,Austin noticed this as he walked past you to get ready to leave on the bus back to the hotel you were all staying. You were all on the bus now,you sat far away from everyone,in the very front you were on your phone mindlessly scrolling socials. You felt eyes on you and you knew it was Austin,that made your heart squeeze itself.

Once you all arrived at the hotel all of you got onto the elevator,Austin was oddly close standing so close your shoulders pressed together. Once the elevator dinged you all went separate ways to your rooms..or at least that’s what you thought. You heard footsteps behind you,you walked towards your room and once you reached for the door you quickly turned around and saw Austin. “Hey..” he spoke breathlessly. You looked annoyed but mostly emotional he couldn’t read your expression. “Can I come in?..” you looked shocked by this,you quickly shook your head and tried to rush into your room “no Austin— No not just no,just fuck no—“ you scoffed and walked into your room and tried to slam the door but he stopped it and barged into your room. You turned to him and had tears streaming down your already redden and wet cheeks. “We’re talking..I don’t care how you feel (Y/N)..” he spoke with a bit of anger. Your eyes widened before you gave your speech,well that’s how would Austin described it.

“No! You don’t get to fucking decide when we talk..you don’t get to tell me how to feel! Now after what you did to me! Did you not see it?! Did you not see how I looked at you and hear how I spoke?! The way I made everything happen just for you?! I even put your shitty song lyrics in our song!” You screamed and continued to let the tears flow,using your hands to speak and put more emotions into it.

“Are you kidding me?! I’m trying to figure out why you’re so emotional and weird all of a sudden! I’m being nice to you! We’ve been friends for years and im showing I care. What are you going on ab—!” You scoffed and threw your hands up in the air before turning away just to look back at him and pointing a finger into his chest.

“I. Loved. You..ever since I met you I loved you. My heart was set on you and your stupid blue eyes and your perfect lips and perfect body..a-and and—“ you put your hands up into your hair and gripped onto it “you..you were just you and I fell in love with yo—“ you let your hands fall to your sides but before you could speak he grabbed the sides of your face and kissed you passionately but with a bit of aggression. It caught you off guard but you kissed back,you held onto his wrist gently as you both walked. You were walking backwards and he basically guided you to your room. He picked you up by the back of your thighs,her laid you down on the bed and continued to passionate kiss.

He pulled away from the kiss and lifted up your dress,pulling it off your beautiful body. Happy to see you were wearing no bra but a pretty pair of black lace panties,you crossed your arms over your breast and shuddered. You turned away from him and whimpered softly,Austin untied your combat boots and pulled them off your tired feet,he pulled off your socks and kiss up from your calves to your thighs. He pulled off his shirt and kicked off his shoes. He fell to his knees and kissed your inner thigh from the right to the left side,gently biting down on your soft skins. You felt your pussy clinch around nothing as the wetness from you core drenched the cotton.

You moaned gently and covered your mouth,you felt him hook his fingers underneath the band of your panties. He tugged them off,you lifted your hips up and bit your bottom lip a little too hard, you pierced the skin making you flinch. He looked up and smirked up at you knowing he made you crazy,he put your thighs over his shoulders. He started licking up your arousal,it was sweet. The best things he’s ever tasted,he sucked your clit and watched as you squirmed and pressed your hips down onto his face the best you could. He pulled away and rubbed two fingers against your wet core,getting them wet with your slick. With the two wet digits he fingered your drenched and aching pussy slowly,pumping his fingers gently while curling them up to hit that spongey spot that made you arch your back.

He went back to licking and sucking your clit,he took you for granted and he was gonna make up for it. Your beautiful body and your sweet pussy was everything he was missing,all the girls meant nothing to him anymore. He realized he needed you,only you that all he could think of now. You started to feel a coil in your stomach tangle and begin to unwind and get close to snapping. Knowing you were about to cum you tried to push him away but he wouldn’t let you,he pressed your hips down and licked and sucked faster but still at a gentle pace. His fingers working and stretching you out. You rocked you hips wildly “Austin,Austin fuckfuckfuckfuck!—“ you moaned loudly and finally came into his fingers,he moaned against your clit. You gasped loudly and whimpered,he finally pulled away and pulled his fingers out slowly.

“I’m gonna make you feel so good honey..I’ve neglected you for so long baby..I’m so so sorry..”

He spoke softly,he stood up and took off his belt and unbuttoned and then unzipped his jeans before pulling them down along with his boxers. His cocked bounced up,your eyes widened. You’ve seen the outline of it before,you knew he was blessed but seeing it hard and up close made you shake. It was long and tick,leaking with pre-cum,you did this to him and you couldn’t believe it. You felt years well up in your eyes and he noticed,he gently kissed near your eyes and over your eyelids. “Don’t cry honey..I’m sorry baby I really am..” you finally cried tears of pure joy and laughed as you wrapped your arms around his neck “nonono don’t worry I-I’m just so happy like..I’ve dreamed about this..” you hiccuped as you felt him pick you up and lay on down long ways in the bed with him towering over you.

He sat up while sitting in his knees,he grabbed your calves and put them on other sides of his hips. He pulled you closer,the shaft of his cock laid against your sensitive clit. It made you moan softly,he stared into your eyes as he slowly rubbed your stomach and smiled happily. It was a genuine smile,something you’ve always wanted to see for so long. “I should’ve found out sooner baby..I could’ve made you feel so so so good sooner..” he whispered,he held the shaft of his cock and slowly pressed the tip into your tight cunt. “Oh fuck aus—“ you let your eyes roll back as you felt him press every inch into you,he filled you up so nicely. His eyes were glued onto his cock sliding into you,his mouth hung open.

He had finally bottomed out,he was pressed into you so nicely you felt him grazing over your cervix. This made you cry out,he leaned down holding your little body close to him,you once again wrapped your arms around him and scratched his tan skin,leaving angry red marks. You heard him groan loudly into your ear,her was fully pressed against your cervix now in this position you couldn’t handle this for long. He slowly pulled out making you whimper before he slowly pushed all the way back it. You let out a loud gasp and you let out a choked moan,he raised up slightly and stared down at you and he observed your fucked our face.

“God your pussy is sucking me I-in I could cum right now..fill you up nice and g-good..”

He whispered softly and started to thrust,it was slow but it had a bit of speed and power but not too much. He didn’t want to hurt you not ever or ever again,he knew he hurt you so many times before and he didn’t want to hurt you in such an intimate moment. You hid your face in his shoulder and bit down leaving a dark red and purple mark,he moaned loudly. Now his thrust gained more speed and strength,he thrusted into you like his life depended on it.

He growled softly into your ear,he kissed up your neck,he left dark marks along your soft neck and up your jaw. He groaned loudly now. You knew he was holding back you wanted all of him. “P-please Aus..please fuck me..pleasepleaseplease..I need your cock deep inside of me..” You moaned into his ear and he gladly took your invitation. He thrusted into you wildly and roughly,she growled and grunted loudly and he looked wild. You stared as his face contorted and twisted as he thrusted in and out of your sopping cunt,you cried out and rocked you hips against him as you felt you second orgasm approaching,you clinched and sloppily grind against his thrust you couldn’t take much more.

“Is my baby gonna cum?Hah..—Hm? My pretty girl wanna cum on my cock?Fuck..—Come on a baby be a good girl..let me feel you cum all over my cock..god you’re so fucking right..” He grunted loudly and stared into your tired half lidded eyes. You nodded you head quickly as you felt your climax getting closer. With one last strong thrust you came all over his cock,squeezing down on his cock making him shutter and he gave you one more thrust before feeling up your warm cunt with his hot cum. He groaned and slammed into you. He stared up at the ceiling before dropping his head and staring down at you.

He slowly pulled out,watching as his cum spilled out of you. He smirked and let out a breathless laugh before plopping next to you and pulling you close. He wrapped the blanket over the both of you,as you both cuddled he lazily dragged his hand down your stomach and to your puffy and sore pussy,he gently pressed his fingers into you. Gently pumping into you,trying to keep his cum inside of you. You whimpered softly and snuggled your face into his shoulder.

“I love you..” he whispered down into your ear as he closed his eyes and spoke sleepily,he was getting close to passing out.

“I love you too..I always will.” You spoke softly and closed your eyes. You both finally fell asleep,you slept in until the late afternoon that next day and it was the best sleep of your life.

Hii! I hope you guys enjoy this little one shot,I finished this before my other stories so I’m posting it! More coming soon..



[fvcking-panda]

Okay so

Will x Gareth. A.k.a greatwise

Brain is going brrrrr with them rn, i hope this makes sense.

First encounter

• Will comes back to Hawkins and realizes there is a d&d club now that doesn't have a DM anymore because Eddie graduated (because he did, we don't accept the last episode in this account thank u very much).

• So on the first day of school, everyone in the table are discussing about what they're gonna do now without Eddie, and my sweet child raise his hand with shyness like: "I can plan a campaign if you all want to-". And Gareth is fucking excited because neither him, Jeff or freak #1 (which i decided to named Frank because that dude doesn't have a name) make great campaigns, and Mike doesn't make them anymore since season 2, so he's curious and has high expectations because Dustin talked about Will the entire time BECAUSE HE'S A GREAT PERSON AND HE DEFINITELY WORSHIP HIS BESTIE IN FRONT THE ENTIRE HELLFIRE CLUB.

• So Will is fucking nervous because he want to impress them, especially 'cause even if Mike is his best friend, they're growing apart and he know is not the same anymore, so this is his oportunity to make more friends in high school, Will doesn't want to ruin it.

• So he spends all his free time writing it, having Eddie's help of course, but Eddie doesn't have the entire information about it because he's gonna be part of the first session and Will want to impress him too.

• But sweet Will doesn't understand the concept of have some rest and he starts to fall asleep on class, which unfortunately for him and perfect for the plot, made him walk down the last room at the end of the day for detention.

• You will not guess who's also there.

• Is Gareth, ofc, my boy ended there for the third fight of the week, and it's Tuesday.

• He's on the last desk of the classroom playing with his pencils like they're drumsticks. He also has an ugly injury on the lip for the fight, and he has that bitch face who make everyone around him avoid any near seat.

• But Will is relieved for a familiar face, especially because he's in Hellfire club so maybe he can bond the time talking about the campaign (and definitely he'll talk about the subject to make notes about what they're expecting).

• So he sits right next to Gareth, who didn't reacted because he was more focused on remember the "master of puppers" drum solo than the other poor soul trapped in detention too.

• "Another fight?". Will asks, trying to look friendly, he almost regret it because Gareth turn around annoyed by the interruption, but Emerson smiles brightly when he realizes is the new kid.

• He explains the reason of the fight was another person insulting the Hellfire club, naming them a cult especially because they told that now was complete because the "zombie boy" joined and that somehow sounded like the human sacrifice all cults needs to.

• Gareth is upset when he's telling it and Will would be sad if he was focused on it, but he's more shocked because they barely know each other, the only thing they have in common is the Hellfire club and that both goes to the same school, they are not even in the same grade and he wasnt there with the upside down combo so no trauma-bonding. So why he got into a fight to defend him?

• Gareth of course realizes the silent he's inmersed into, and missinterpret it like he's affected about it, so he tries to cheer him. "Don't pay attention, they're douchebags who wouldn't recognize greatness even if it punched on their faces, I know, I tried".

• Will just smiles, "did you just made a pun with your nickname, Gareth the great?".

• They spend the rest of the detention talking and they realize how much they have in common. The d&d is just the surface of the iceberg, because they also share similar music taste, and that my dudes and duddetes and everything in between is a new world for them.

• Will only had Johnathan to talk about it before, and Gareth's taste is slightly different than the rest of Corroded Coffin, he's interested in metal of course, but he likes rock a little bit more. And Will starts to ramble about the his especial vinyl collection on his house.

• "no way, Queen? Do you have the newest already?" Will tell him how he made Argyle and Johnathan stay with him outside the music shop one day before to be the first one to adquire it.

• "You can go at my house if you want to".

• "Sure! Give me your address".

• Will opens a notebook to write in it and his sketchbook falls, Gareth immediately bend down to grab it but the sketchbook is opened at the middle and he cannot avoid to look at it.

• "Did you draw this?"

• Will is embarrased, first of all because that's a David Bowie portrait with pencil and is not his best one, but also because he cannot think in a straight explanation of why he draw him without clothes (even if he swear is for practicing purposes in human anatomy).

• But Gareth is really impressed, like, legitimately amazed by Will's skills. The drawing is so cool and he cannot believe is made with pencil only. He assures at Will how much talented he is, and a blushed Byers just smiles brightly, both relieved and flattered because Gareth is cool with it.

• So Will trust him enought to let Gareth look at the rest of the sketchbook. Will has a lot of different things in there: ideas for paints, color test with his new set of watercolors, the party's portraits, some backgrounds of California, previous campaign notes and the characters he returned to write again since he left Hawkins, now with different backstories that he wrote on little stick notes on the corners of the pages.

• Gareth starts to ask about the drawings, and Will is happy because he's really respectful with them, like, he's not passing the pages quickly, he is actually admiring it, following with the gaze the traces, and he's curious about what he has to say, so Byers spoil him talking about little details too. "I was actually listening this specific song on that one", "El is actually a great model, she let me draw her often and doesn't move a lot", "i've been stuck in what colors i want to paint that one", "that's an old character that i was thinking to use in the new campaign".

• Will cannot remember what was the last time someone outside his family showed interest in the things he liked. And Gareth is a great listener. He also has a cute smile, Will likes the dimples specially.

• But hear me out, Will's intern monologe is that he's just admiring him like an artist, because objectively artists are used to watch people intensily to decode the principal gestures on them to translate it in paper. So Will is there like "im admiring him for artistic purposes".

• ...Besides, Gareth looks unaware because he's really concentrated on the sketchbook, so It doesn't hurt anyone, right?

• And he has a soft hair, it looks even softer than Steve's. Also his hands are cute, they're probably smaller than his actually, but way strongest too. And his lips-

• Will's face is red and tries to shake those thoughts by writing his adress on the back of a stupid doodle (a little demon dancing) and gave it to Gareth.

• Detention is over, and both are kind of dissapointed because they were actually enjoying it.

• "until Friday, Will the wise!". Gareth's smile is really soft, and contrast with his usual bitch face really well. He just waves and return to his house.

• Will tries to concentrate in the campaign right before he head off to bed, but his brain is exhausted, so he starts to draw randomly on the paper trying to relax.

• Is until the fourth doodle he realizes he's drawing Gareth.

• But is really abstract, is mostly different details he noted before, he doesn't dare to draw his entire face because that could be weird, right?

• So he just fill the rest of the page with a Queen's song lyrics before turn off the light and decides to try and sleep.

• And he pass out immediatly, and for the first time in weeks, he feels relaxed enought to sleep without any dream about the Upside Down.

• Because for the first time in years he felt a little bit of what a teenage normal life looked like, having someone interested in him besides the Upside Down thing, having someone actually listening, having someone who... Who wanted to meet him more, another teenager who was really cool and for some reason wanted to defend him without the overprotection. Someone who didnt make it because he knew about Vecna, just because he found Will worth it for being himself.

----

(Im not planning of writing a fanfic because i can't take that responsability atm. But if anyone is interested to properly write it please go ahead! Just give me credits and send me the link!)

[anteroom-of-death]

Teacher's Pet part 3

Synopsis: The Doctor struggles with morality. The student is struggling. Both are tearing themselves up.

A/n: I'm sorry for the bit of pain. The next one should be a bit more pain, but it will get better soon. Also. These things are fun to bang out. Especially when you listen to dramatic early 2000s nu metal. Thank you all. Your response to this mean the world to me.

Utterly ashamed and indecent, the Doctor remarked to himself once (y/n) fled the office. He felt utterly indecent. Ashamed. He was shocked that even he could hold such an array of thoughts. Not that he didn’t have similar thoughts before. He had been married before. To multiple people, multiple times. He was the reason why the Virgin Queen wasn’t really a Virgin.

But to a student? No, he couldn’t. Even though this was a charade, he still felt bound to at least some of the rules a professor should follow…

And the scenarios his mind was running? Much more akin to something that his dear best enemy, locked in her Vault would have.

He kicked her out for her own good. Her obvious tone shift and body language change had clued him in to the fact that she picked up on it. The girl was very good at making connections, it seemed. Maybe not getting them in a correct or orderly manner. But she was no idiot. Despite what her brain, past educators, and experts had probably told her.

He knew all about various so-called learning disabilities and some honestly just seemed like evolutionary differences to give the species different roles throughout the tribes and flocks.

Once, before Rose. Before he swore to himself that he would run solo forevermore. He held the idea, the hypothesis: to take a random person from a random planet. Mold their life and bend it to his will. Make a perfect companion. One noble enough to save the day, but not stupid and caring enough to get themselves killed in an act of bravery. Like so many if his past ones.

He shuddered, thanking Rose in Pete’s world for saving him from himself…

But this one? He felt oddly returned to this idea. A perfect companion. This time shaped by her own insecurities. Not preconditions he would control. He admitted he was lonely.

Nardole and Missy didn’t really count.

He stopped himself there. Maybe Missy was rubbing off on him. Getting him to pry back into those darker, more primal urges.

He needed a breath of fresh air. A trip off-planet.

Just Missy’s influence, he shook himself as he meandered down to the mess hall to get a bit of scran before a trip to somewhere. Nothing more, nothing less. Relapse in it's most basic indulgences.

He found himself at the Eye of Orion. Just exactly what the Doctor ordered! Peace and solace. Stop what was shaking him up at the source.

Too bad that he was being plagued by thoughts of (y/n).

She was possessing him.

Clever, nervous, just a hint of something else. She came to the meeting with some sparkly gunk crusted to her eye corners and the residuals of make up being slapped on in layers.

The way she quickly diverted the topic when her work was mentioned slightly irked him. She didn’t elaborate, just a missed appointment and a shocked tone.

What did she do?

Another mystery girl to lure him out of his shell. The universe, in all of its infinite wisdom, loved tossing mystery women at him.

They always frustrated him to arousal. A stupid trait he felt he got from his days crushing over Missy when they were young lads. Back when he shielded everyone from the Drums until they drove him to madness and self-corruption.

Corruption…

That stupid past plot of his past self echoed again. It might be fun. She might be fairly easy to tip into it on her own accord.

He decided against it. Ultimately.

Missy’s influence. Damn it!

He leaned back on the patch of grass he was on. Trying to clear his mind. She was just another daft ape. Just a student for him to inspire to help along the way.

But her grins and demeanor wouldn’t leave him.

Her hunched over form, and the clanging of her jewelry and the way she used her hands to speak…

Was doing something to him. Awakening something he tried to kill.

He relaxed for a while more before returning. Nardole, of course, was exasperated that he went away. Especially without telling him beforehand…

He hadn’t felt this frantic since he was locked in the Confession Dial.

Back in his office, he had a queue of students waiting for Office Hours. Mainly droll questions about the mid-term project. (Mandatory by the university.) The other students sat in her seat, where she had spilled crumbs on. He engaged them. And got a kick out of them and their findings and research. There were a good batch of students in his classes this term.

The Doctor found delight in them and the thoughts of (y/n) went to back-burner.

Then Tuesday came. One of the two days the class (y/n) was in was.

He groaned.

Hopefully today whatever was abnormal faded. Maybe she’d not come. Some sort of survival instinct will have kicked in…

Of course. He wasn’t so lucky. He remembered her scribbled maths equations about her monetary investment in university. He doubted that she’d go and waste the nearly eighty pounds a singular class was costing her. It seemed out of character.

He, in bad faith, wished her ill enough to take off.

Too bad the universe rarely responded well to bargaining.

She slunk in in between the masses of people. As if to go incognito, to not draw his attention. She removed her notebook and got a pen out and slouched forward. He scanned the room as he opened up with his exciting build-upon on Thursday’s lecture. A poem from Robert Burns that tangentially related to the themes. She wasn’t making eye contact, instead she was chewing on the chain of one of her many necklaces. This particular one was the chain that held a pendant with a historical symbol. She was scribbling furiously. Her eyes squinted and she seemed to be muttering a tad bit under her breath. He didn’t want to admit how much he wanted to pry in. To hear. To understand. To respond. To feel.

“And fare thee weel, my only luve! And fare thee weel awhile! And I will come again, my luve, Though it were ten thousand mile.” He finished and then went on with a remark.

“Does the universe love us? Does it owe us?And if it does, why?” He opened up to the floor to discussion and debate.

Many responded, except for (y/n), who obviously was holding her tongue and trying to not make eye contact with anyone. Just focused in on writing and listening.

He could carve out a response from her.

“Miss (y/n’s surname)? What do you think, I think Braelynne made a fantastic point. Come, join us.”

(Y/n) spat out the chain and straightened up her posture. She had pen ink on her chin and looked, quite frankly like she’d leak tears.

She sniffled before speaking, a crack in her voice. “I think it’d be narcissistic to assume that the universe owes us anything. But does it love us? Maybe. It loves itself through us. Like, like, like, when we do tasks like help an elderly neighbor carry their groceries in. Or give a few coins to a homeless person. It’s the universe loving itself. Maybe it’s like when you drink something probiotic. To the germs in your gut…aren’t you the entire universe? I don’t know. I do think that thinking you, out of all creation, prioritizing yourself in the center of it….uhhh. Red flag!” She flustered, grabbing her pen and resuming the furious scratching she was making.

That gave the Doctor a world of insight to her brain, inner workings. Maybe she felt like she was owed something but held some remorse over these thoughts. It seemed conflicting in her punctuation and how hard she seemed to force the words out. Wise, beyond wise, but also leaving herself a tad bit shortsighted and a decided lack of grace.

Obviously she didn’t want to speak. Obviously she had plenty to occupy her mind with at that moment.

So he pursued via others, “Is it narcissistic to expect something when, by (y/n)’s standards, we’re bacteria and microbes in a greater gut system?”

Someone replied that it was reductive and put humans on the same levels as non-sentient life. That they had greater purposes. That the microbes’ lives were less vital than a human life. (Y/n) scrunched her nose in disgust at such a statement. Internal dissent.

Ah, he thought, very good. A measure of her morals.

He built on that. He opened up the topic, getting more opinions from the other student. Hoping she’d speak up…

He noticed (y/n) shoving her things into her bag and sniffling again. Maybe he did get what he earlier asked the universe for. Maybe she was sick. Maybe.

Ironic.

She made a beeline for the door, “Sorry. I have…an emergency.” She turned to him at the door. “I’ll get the notes from someone.” She promised. Her chest was beginning to visibly heave.

He nodded and she shot out of the room like a horse out of a gate.

[skywalkin-in-the-papes]

Newsies And What Instruments They Play - Headcanon

Hey there! Here's some Newsies headcanons that me and my pals @nycnewsgirl and @newsies-but-theacadianway came with about what instruments the boys would play. I added the details just to make it a little more fun. Anyhoo, I'm curious about what you think so feel free to agree or disagree or come up with your own ideas in the comments.

-Jack sings and plays the guitar. And Katherine equally loves it and makes fun of it being the most cliche way ever to romance a girl (which he definitely does take her up to the rooftop of the lodge and strums away on his guitar while singing to her. He loves the vibe and romance of it. She...doesn't always roast him.) He just enjoys the simplicity of his own voice accompanied by a guitar. And also, he can sing whenever he wants up on the rooftop and most of the time no one sends out a noise complaint. Jack likes to sing and play a lot of pop and country songs but he'll branch out and try new things if someone introduces him to it. Mostly, he just likes to play things that the boys (mostly Crutchie) want to hear or play along with him. He just loves getting to sing and play because to him, it helps him feel free and like he can do anything. Jack also will occasionally play harmonica because Santa Fe. Need I say any more?

-Davey plays piano and he can play most of your typical classical pieces by memory. He has the perfect piano posture and is fairly graceful and delicate. He likes to lead a group from the piano but doesn't like to play piano duets with anyone else really (ask Sarah.). He's actually really good at jazz though and likes being creative with classical pieces by putting a jazz spin on them.

-Crutchie plays mandolin and banjo. He loves to strum little folksy tunes and sit outside on the rooftop. Sometimes he'll convince Jack to learn the words to the song and sing along with him (oh who are we kidding? Jack 100% learns the words to the songs and how to play it on the guitar.). Crutchie is very chilled out by his music and sometimes he'll come down into the bunkroom and play songs so the little boys will go to sleep. He's a beast at the mandolin too (which is a feat considering it has twelve strings) because he plays at least once a day for awhile and Jack can't say no so he'll join in and then it'll wind up being more like 2 hours of play time.

-Race can play the triangle (yes, he wakes the boys who won't get out of bed up with it every morning and yes, they HATE it.). He uses it every time any kind of a meal rolls around when everyone is home (the boys kinda hate this too but not as much as the other aforementioned triangle use). At Christmas time, Race will play the slap stick in Sleigh Ride and will leap across the stage like a reindeer (claiming that it helps him feel more like one) as he slaps the two wooden 2 x 4s together. In a regular setting, he usually has both of these percussion instruments nearby. Race can also play guitar and he likes to play...any kind of music really. He likes anything that he can strum fast and/or hard to. He's not a very gentle player (which when he plays with Finch who also plays guitar, they play things that have an equal amount of picking and strumming). He also likes to collect picks and NO ONE can touch his precious picks without his permission. (Thanks, Nutcracker for helping come up with the last couple things for Race). None of the boys question it anymore because they've put up with Race's antics long enough that they know better.

-Albert plays barry sax and/or drums. He likes that with the barry sax he gets to be a solid presence but still stable and not have to do anything too fancy most of the time. He appreciates the occasional solo that'll get thrown his way but he just likes to stick to the fun low rhythms. When he plays drums (and he's not too busy hardcore judging Race for his triangle or slapstick playing), he likes to be a little bit fancier with the rhythms and he likes to be a little bit louder. He likes to remind people that he is there and he IS the stable rhythm. He likes to play any kind of rock or metal songs on the drums. Something that has drive but a stable rhythm. On his barry sax, he likes to play anything that's got a fun but stable groove to it.

-Les plays baby bongos(the Davey approved instrument) and trumpet(obviously the non-Davey approved instrument). He would never tell Davey this but(he actually enjoys the baby bongoes because they sound fun). He really likes to play the trumpet because it's loud, he can play fast on it, and it annoys Davey. The baby bongos are almost a little too small and a little too boring for him because Davey just teaches him really simple rhythms while Les wants to learn something more...intense. Hence why he had Finch teach him trumpet (Finch plays a lot of things.).

Speaking of the bird boy...

-Finch plays a lot of different instruments....like a lot. He plays guitar, flute, trumpet, and really any kind of brass instrument to name a few. He appreciates them all for the different styles of music he can experiment with. He spends a lot of time playing guitar and learning all kinds of different pieces on it but he really plays a variety of instruments for a variety of occasions. He likes being able to play the different instruments just whenever he feels like it (Jack had to tell him he could only play flute and guitar late at night because they're quieter). Oftentimes during a performance, he'll be running around the stage, filling in on different parts or playing a song here only to run across the stage to play a song on a completely different instrument. Somehow he manages to keep all of his different clefs and keys straight (just don't ask him what happened during a performance of The Little Mermaid for his high school. He was playing trumpet and picked up his flute and had the trumpet music in front of him and it got confusing real fast. Thankfully, Finch got his flute music and it was all good.). Finch likes playing with the other boys who play instruments as well as teaching some of the other boys instruments. He loves random little jam sessions and watching one of his friends achieve a new skill on an instrument (they all joke that he's the one going to Carnegie though). Finch just enjoys sitting in a tree with an instrument after a long day and playing while forgetting his problems, sometimes by himself or with a couple of his close friends.

-Romeo plays the accordion and some hand percussion (give that boy a tambourine and....well you'll feel whatever you feel when he starts playing it). Why? So he can croon romantic songs while playing the accordion. Does it work? Ummm..... Nah, he really loves it because he likes to learn love songs on it and he feels that the accordion is a very romantic instrument. He also likes that you get to play keys and push a lot of buttons. It's very hands on which is a good thing for him. When Race annoys (he doesn't think it's annoying but ask Romeo) the boys in the morning with the triangle, Romeo gets out the accordion and then things escalate into a noise war (Jack eventually kicks them both out onto the fire escape or something). Most of the time though, Romeo likes to play the accordion out on the fire escape to see if a neighboring apartment has a fair young woman who would be interested in hearing his playing. He appreciates how the accordion allows him to be flamboyant and expressive all at the same time while being his (in his book) most mastered attribute....romantic. As far as the hand percussion goes, he can be as loud and enthusiastic as he wants with it and nobody judges. He loves the tambourine (it's his favorite one) because it's loud and requires a lot of movement. If he wants to impress someone though, he goes for the accordion.

-Spot plays the violin. He..surprisingly plays some very pretty classical music on it (which Race totally makes fun of him for from the percussion section), folksy songs (boy does have some Irish heritage) and he likes playing as the violinist for groups who perform rock operas. His classical training enables him to do...so much with his violin. He started by taking violin lessons as one normally would and just playing a lot of different kinds of music which in turn made him a very versatile musician. The other violinists he knows all think he's amazing (and his reputation is something Spot doesn't let others think they can trifle with). Spot basks in this but purposely appears hard to please so he can maintain his tough reputation. He really enjoys the classical music as much as the other music but he can't let anyone know because that would reveal that he has a soft spot and Spot Conlon does NOT have a soft spot.

-Jojo plays ukulele and playing it takes him right to his happy place. He'll sit on the beach in Brooklyn (Spot won't kick him out because he actually likes the peaceful vibes of Jojo's playing) and just strum a song. Sometimes it's some kind of island song that he learned from the Internet, a pop song, or some kind of Spanish guitar song but Jojo thinks it sounds better on ukulele so that's where it gets played the most. When some of the younger boys are struggling to go to sleep, he'll strum some peaceful music to go to sleep. The other boys don't care because it actually helps them go to sleep better too. That and it's Jojo and the music is very peaceful. Sometimes he hums along but he's kind of shy about his singing voice so he mostly just strums. Once he picked up ukulele, he realized that this is the one habit which soothe any nerves that he has. He'll sit somewhere and play by himself and just enjoy the peaceful rhythm of his strumming or he'll play for others so they can feel the same kind of calm and peace that he does.

-Kid Blink plays alto sax. He likes that it's kind of loud but can do some really cool things and can be as smooth as butter. It's kind of an aggressive instrument but it can do some amazing things. Part of the reason why Blink likes it so much. He can play some of the punchiest melodies on the planet that are loud and biting while also being able to play some of the smoothest jazz pieces. Blink typically likes to play band music or jazz. He loves band arrangements of pop songs (even though he finds the actual pop songs annoying, the band version to him is a ton of fun). He likes to play music with Albert, Mush, and really any of the guys. He also likes to compete with Race's triangle and plays louder than Race so that way people can hear something more fun than just Race banging jingle bells on the triangle for the umpteenth time. He and Romeo then get into a "who can play louder" competition and...yeah, you can imagine how that goes. There's a lot of loud accordion and saxophone music going on. Blink likes playing smooth jazz pieces that sound beautiful and he likes some of the more fun and fast jazz solos. He's someone who really really likes to see how fast he can play so he'll pick something ambitious to play and just goes to town on it. He and Albert get into little who can play faster competitions and the boys cheer them on. Crutchie, Mush, Jojo, or Buttons will tell them that they really play equally fast but the boys don't listen. They want to WIN. (Except any of those boys most definitely can shred more than Blink and Al but they don't need to know that). Blink just likes playing saxophone because it's freeing. He can be as loud as he wants and it still sounds cool. Much like how he has a somewhat loud and outgoing personality, but he can do a lot of cool things with it.

(Okay, this next one might get really long because I love Mush and his instrument. I'm sorry but I also love Mush so I'm not that sorry)

-Mush plays clarinet and he's really good at it. He loves getting to play pretty jazz things, pretty classical things...etc. He also likes playing things that are a bit more loud and flamboyant but he likes playing quieter too and some of the more elegant styles. That being said, Mush likes to play just about anything as long as he doesn't just sit there and hold notes. He thinks that that is really boring even if the melody on top is really pretty. Davey loves to play music with him because they can play some really pretty duets and Mush typically follows the music or Davey's directions. They play some really pretty things that surprisingly will captivate some of the younger boys on any given night. Mush LOVES to play in the pit for musicals. He loves it when he gets to play fun little solos or the melody that the cast is singing. He likes the jazzy musicals the best because then he gets to bust out his jazz skills as well. And maaaaannnn, does this boy have jazz skills? He can do slides and vibrato and growls pretty well. Sometimes they go sideways and it makes him and whoever is playing with him laugh. Mush plays music with a lot of the different boys. He likes to learn new songs and styles and try out different tricks that he learns on his clarinet with these new songs. He'll play just about anywhere and at anytime really. If there's a girl he likes in the room, he'll just casually start playing from somewhere else in the room and see if she notices. Jack will periodically kick him out to the fire escape at night if there is some peace and quiet needed in the lodging house. He'll just sit on his bunk(which is a top one for the sake of this headcanon) and casually swing his legs back and forth while he's playing. But seriously, he'll play just about anywhere. He can play really high notes on his clarinet and sometimes that's more effective in getting the boys to be quiet than shouting or whistling at them because high notes on a clarinet are super loud (Skittery hates it when this happens and it's not in a piece of music). Mush likes to play in a little jazz combo with Finch, Albert, Skittery, Davey, and sometimes Crutchie or Jack. They have a ton of fun playing little jazz songs from the 30s but they usually do that when the littles are out for the night so that they can just enjoy their music. Blink and Mush also play a lot of music together because they both play woodwinds (yes, I'm aware that sax is also technically a brass instrument) and they play jazz songs and all kinds of things. Sometimes Blink joins in on the little jazz combo when he has free time to do so and he and Mush will trade solos back and forth just for fun. Mush and Finch play together a lot too and they also would trade solos back and forth (Finch plays a variety of instruments that go well with Mush's clarinet so it would depend on the day and his mood what he's playing). Mush plays in a lot of different groups when he has time and similar to Finch, has a pretty well rounded musical skill set.

Also, I did actually write something on Wattpad where Mush plays clarinet: https://www.wattpad.com/1116924147-life-with-the-newsies-one-shots-open-to-ocs-all

It's a 20s AU oneshot and I had a blast writing it. I am hoping to write some more for him in the future.

-Skittery plays drums and double bass/bass guitar. He likes the drums because he can hold down the rhythm but it also helps him get out any...frustrations. He really likes rock and metal music for this reason because he can hit the drums as hard and fast as he wants and no one's complaining as long as it sounds cool. He sometimes will play bass guitar but only in a more chill setting. He enjoys getting to play some cool bass solo every once in awhile in some kind of fancy rock song. Bass can get really gritty and Skittery can really let some of his more negative emotions just get lost in the bass solos. He also will play double bass in orchestral or jazz music. Orchestral music is something that Skittery....tolerates. He just...for some reason doesn't find it very interesting. He LOVES jazz though because he can play some fun and fast jazz solos. He also likes that they don't sound as gritty but that his jazz solos can just be so...pleasant to play. Again, it really helps him get out of his crappy mood (even though he'll deny it) to just go to town on some kind of jazz song where he gets to go all over the bass' register. Skittery likes things (and he would never admit this) that are just...fun to play on an emotional level because they really do make him happy. He doesn't like to stick out but he likes to have his moments of fun and he likes to hold down a reliable rhythm that people can count on.

-Buttons plays the banjo. He honestly love the more...rustic sound of it. He enjoys playing fast folk songs but he'll also play a soothing ballad and get into it just the same. Buttons can finger pick across the fret board of a banjo quite well and aspires to be like some of the great bluegrass players someday (seriously, just look at this man's Spotify Wrapped. It's all FOLK). He and Crutchie, Jack, or Finch will sometimes play together. Buttons also really enjoys Southern Gospel music so he'll play that too sometimes. He just enjoys all of the things that a banjo can do and yet, it feels so simple because it's all on one instrument. It can add a lot but it's still simple and can stand up on it's own, much like himself.

(Can you tell that I like things to have deeper meanings? These all end with these instruments relating to the boys in some way).

-Elmer is Buttons' (and sometimes Crutchie's) folksy partner in crime with his fiddle/violin. These two will play together for HOURS. Elmer and Buttons have learned all of the folk songs together and they both know all of the little solos that make those songs sound the way that they should. Elmer also will play classical music and periodically a pop song or two, but folk is really where his heart's at. He has played jazz occasionally and enjoys it too. Elmer loves violin because it sticks out in the group. It's also something pretty unique in and of itself (even though Skittery literally tells him it's the most POPULAR string instrument. Yes, Elmer gets very passionate about that topic.) and Elmer just really likes its versatility. He primarily uses it for folk music but he enjoys having an instrument that meshes well with a lot of different styles. He likes being able to blend in and stick out all the same. He wants his moments of solo time to shine and to be heard but, he wants others to be heard too.

-Specs plays tenor sax. He loves how low and mellow it is. He can play some pretty things that stick out but, he prefers to keep things smooth and chill. He and Finch will play together a lot to just sort of jam. Specs like just getting to vibe and play smooth jazz music or pop songs. Most of the time, he prefers really chill and slow jazz. He finds it soothing and it gives him a chance to stand out without overdoing things too much. He particularly likes French sounding jazz because it has a lot of smooth and pretty tenor saxophone in it. He loves getting to sustain notes down in that lower register just because they sound absolutely reassuring. He finds it easy to lose himself in music like that. This boys absolutely LOVES to play gentle soft jazz when it's raining outside. Like he just loves the rainy jazz vibes that tenor sax allows him to experience. He's not the most vibey person but this gives him all the feels for sure. He also has a lot of fun playing more energetic music though and will play some fun solos in more exciting swing music songs (and he will sometimes prove to the boys that yes he CAN in fact solo and keep up with the rest of them and he doesn't prefer to stick in the background all the time...). The smoother jazz is more relaxing to him and it allows him to play things that he wants to play without it always being chaotic and loud (even though he plays a notoriously loud instrument) because he enjoys getting to have his moments but he prefers them to be more chill and relaxing, just like he is most of the time. Being slow and more relaxed calms the anxiety that he has about always having to...perform well and allows him to just be himself.

(Yeah, sorry if that was a crappy ending on that one. I feel like some of these background Newsies are all starting to seem the same even if they're very different people.)

And last but not least....

-Henry plays the cello and takes it VERY SERIOUSLY. He's the kind of guy that people play to have Pachelbel's Canon in D at their wedding. Yeah, that's Henry. For some reason, holding half notes to him isn't super boring. He's very particular about his music and will really only play classical music (no seriously, he low-key scoffs at any of the boys who play jazz). He also practices for HOURS a day because he wants to be the best at what he does. Like the absolute best. He plays in nearly every orchestra that he can try out for and he tries to learn ambitious solos. He gets really cranky if he can't find a quiet place to practice in the Lodge where he KNOWS he won't be interrupted. The only people he will sometimes play music with is Davey or Elmer. They're and I quote "the only ones who appreciate classical music enough" (even though Mush, Finch, and Skittery also play classical music. He's tried playing with each of them before...and well. And yeah, don't even ask about Race.). He will sometimes even give both of them the stink eye just because they've been and I quote again "tainted by jazz". He chills out though once he starts playing his music. He just gets lost in it. He's the kind of guy who will talk about one gorgeous chord for a literal ten minutes (and I mean...he's not wrong because it is a beautiful chord.) and the other boys are just nodding their heads. Henry likes the cello because he can be precise and expressive. It allows him to be very present but still allows him to play in a way that is very precise and makes his style well voiced, much like he carries himself.

Alright that's the end.

PSYCH

I'm throwing in a bonus. Merry Christmas!

No actually, Merry Christmas! I'm writing this on Christmas.

Well parts of it, this has been a work in progress for months now but I think I'm finally finishing it. Hectic semester and all that.

-Mike and Ike play marimba and xylophone respectively (and yes, those are different instruments and no, don't tell them they're the same because they may actually fight you. If you really wanna know, ask Race.). They love to play songs together and bounce different rhythms and melodies off each other. They'll play just about anything and they absolutely love songs where they can just go crazy. They work together (periodically even their music wars against each other's but who does that surprise?) and despite their...occasional disagreements, have a ton of fun. The faster they play and the more energetic they can be, the more they feel like themselves. They love sometimes even switching instruments mid-song or playing one song on the same instruments. Their feats are unmatched by the other percussionists within the Lodge because they are 100% the legendary dynamic duo. They enjoy the energy that they get from playing their instruments and the joy that they get by playing together.

Alright, I'm done for real. Merry Christmas, you guys! Hope you have a wonderful day!

[charlierosewriting]

This viewing of Stop Making Sense, in a cinema I went to alone, did two things: it ruined every other time I'll ever try to watch this film again in my life, and revealed itself to be what it has been this whole time. Anti-performance anxiety propaganda. It also cracked me wide open.

I've always seen Stop Making Sense in one of two modes - communally on a TV through it's built-in speakers, or on my phone alone with my big chunky noise-cancelling headphones. I pick whether I want to hear it with others but sacrifice the sound quality, or to hear it at its most beautiful but by myself. In a mostly empty cinema, Stop Making Sense becomes both at once. I can't be sure if it's the A24 remaster or just hearing it on a capital everything SOUND SYSTEM, but the entire experience feels warmer and human this way. Tina Weymouth's bass playing is clearer than ever before, the synths taking a bit more of a backseat to its rumble, and the percussion of both Chris Frantz's drums, David Byrne's boombox and (most transformatively) Steve Scale's set-up hit almost with the force of actual, unshielded, live drumming. After each song, the couple behind me cheered and whooped (half-ironically), and after the midway point I joined in (completely earnestly). It's still not perfectly analogous to a live concert, even then. The audience noise is near immersive in surround sound, but it still feels as distant as the band does all the way over up on that stage. When the songs end and the crowd noise begins, the cinema experience feels strange and hollow and disconnected. I love this way more than a perfect Disneyland imagineered recreation of a Talking Heads concert.

That last point is actually where the most magic is found in seeing Stop Making Sense in a cinema, and what really started to pierce into me; the craftsmanship is more visible. These are small chips in the paintwork you can't see until you get your nose right up to the masterpiece, and every one of them adds more texture and beauty to the whole.

It's easy to be swept away by the sheer magic of Stop Making Sense in any of my usual viewings, because it's already perfect. In Crosseyed and Painless, the camera pans between Alex and David as they trade absolutely cracked guitar solos, and it is a frontrunner for my favourite shot in any film. The whole thing feels effortless and fluid from beginning to end, a document of a band in their peak, beautiful moments of improvisation and genius popping up from both the performers and the cameramen, something divinely ordained.

But when Tina Weymouth is 20ft tall, you notice her lips don't quite match the audio track on Genius of Love, and remember that the film was shot over four nights, not one continuous concert. It isn't a gift from the goddess of music, it's a team of creatives sweating in a studio with probably not great A/C to make something that feels cohesive. When David dances with Ednah and Lynn on Burning Down The House, they perfectly match his strange movements and mimic the guitar playing, and when they're 20ft tall you remember that there must-have been a rehearsal. You remember that the physical CD of Stop Making Sense you own includes a booklet, in which every movement and stage direction is documented, and you wonder if that was written before or after the performance.

One I noticed long before I saw it in the cinema was during the objective pick for best Talking Heads song, This Must Be The Place (Naive Melody), when David enjoys watching the lamp he dances with wobble back into place for just long enough that he misses his cue to sing, and is back at the microphone just half a beat AFTER he starts singing on the audio track.

This is not nitpicking. This is revelatory, this is beautiful, this is the best the film has ever been. This is the autism of Stop Making Sense.

Like Stop Making Sense, I am profoundly autistic. I have been autistic all my life, and I will continue to be autistic. If you asked me if I'm proud to be autistic, I'd say yes, but at the same time I'm sadly not sure if that's true. I have masked so thoroughly and for so long that removing the veneer isn't freeing. Taking it off doesn't let my skin breathe, it exposes raw flesh so tender that it is stung by the air. Some people never have experience with air, tell you not to worry about it, but I think that David Byrne has.

He writes more songs about buildings and food, he dances either like a marionette or like a panic attack, he sings like he is bearing his soul or like he's having a panic attack, the polyrhythms the band finds are joyous grooves or they are panic attacks. Talking Heads is sensory overload about sensory overload, confusing music about being confused, failing radio transmissions about badly communicated emotions.

The difference is, Talking Heads will express that feeling, that disconnect, that hellish radio static in the back of my mind, and make it listenable and funky and fun. When I'm overwhelmed, I'll storm out and cry alone, when David Byrne is overwhelmed, he writes Born Under Punches. When I'm happy, I smile and, if around no-one but my girlfriend, maybe giggle and flap like I wish I could more often - before regaining control and putting the mask back on. When David Byrne is happy, he releases Don't Worry About The Government and the world listens to it.

I want to write songs about buildings and food! I want to write songs about Garak and Power! About the career of Ahmed Johnson! Let me! But I won't, and I don't. I don't think I can right now. But then there's Stop Making Sense.

Stop Making Sense takes every complicated, negative emotion in the discography of Talking Heads, and does something amazing with it; it makes it a party. In its original studio form, Life During Wartime is midtempo and reverby and distressing. The groove is there, but feels intentionally shot in the shin, only allowed to lope in a way that brings out the tension and danger of the lyricism. Then it Stop Making Sense it SKYROCKETS!!! The panic is still there, that essential tender skin of autism, but it is transformed into one of the most bracing and captivating performances of the whole film. Rather than monotonal, almost krautrocky guitar solos, it is given ecstatic synths and almost double the tempo. The studio version of David feels cramped in his situation, the film David runs in place! He wriggles! He sprints laps around the entire stage! The crowd claps and screams! I clap and scream!

This is Stop Making Sense in minutia. The tension and overload of autism is constant, it is pervasive, but what is present is the joy and not the pain. When I stim around my girlfriend I feel completely free momentarily, Talking Heads in Stop Making Sense feel completely free for eighty-eight minutes, and it's infectious.

Masking, at least for me, is performance anxiety. I have an ideal self in my head and, despite my constant trying to change this, she doesn't openly present as autistic yet. I want to perform my best, ideal self, and I need my autism to be part of that, but revealing myself that much to the world is terrifying.

But, once again, here's Stop Making Sense, and its perfect flaws.

The version of Tina we see sing Genius of Love isn't the version we're hearing, but she is beautiful, and I love her. David misses the cue to go back to the microphone, but I still hear his wolf howls and I smile. Chris beams like a headlight at all times, he's having the time of his life. Ednah and Lynn are always so ON that they feel more like Energizer Bunnies than people sometimes, and I wish I could be more like either of them. Jerry is consistently serious looking and kinda wooden, and he's doing so damn well up there. Alex seems to only know one dance move, it's to kick about as high as his chest and look to the right, and it's the coolest thing I've ever seen every time. Bernie looks so self serious at all times, which makes his basic ass solos on Making Flippy Floppy so much funnier and better. Steve Scales, on top of having the best name ever, keeps looking at the crowd like a kid whose parents have come to see him in the school play, and I love him. I love them all.

They are and were real people with interiority and darkness that I'll never know or comprehend, they all did bad things to good people at some point in their lives, and the version of themselves that was captured across these four nights and painted into this eighty-eight minute gasp of euphoria are my family and they are my friends.

David gets to the microphone too late and I hear the wolf howl and I smile, they all continue the song together and I clap, and then I squeal and then I shake and I flap my hands and the mask falls to the ground, and there are two people behind me who can definitely see me right now and they can definitely tell, they can so definitely tell, but this must be the place (naive melody) is the best song ever so I dont really care and the song ends and i find there are tears in my eyes and they dont fall, and before i can reach to pick up what i dropped the synth arpeggios of once in a lifetime start and i no longer have time so i sit theere and i watch and i listen and david dances and now hes wearing glasses and I'm just an animal looking for a home and, share the space for a minute or two! And I'll love you 'til my heart stops! Love you until I'm dead. Eyes that light up, eyes that look through you. Cover up my blind spots, hit me on the head! Awoo!

Postscript:

I tried writing this once on my phone, but the app crashed and deleted my progress and I almost had a panic attack lol. Glad I rewrote it, I want to put this somewhere, but it is somewhat more masked and less raw than the original version. Oh well, it's probably better written.

The one concert movie I've seen that REALLY goes into exposing how it's a construction over different nights is Beyoncé's Homecoming which is a masterpiece in its own right. The way it blatantly shifts outfits and colour schemes across shots is wonderful, people need to talk about that more. Probably shouldn't be me though lol.

[mftm1987]

all-time dream peche show/set

some of y'all bless n keep u are weird enough to want this information and because i am quite literally an information professional (librarian) i spent too much time and thought on this. at least a lot of it was on the clock lmao putting this under a cut bc it goes off

a lil note

i tried to choose songs i know them to perform, which i suppose in some ways defeats the purpose of something like this lol i guess the dream part is in the production/performance. and alan still being in the band and it somehow being 1987 but they also have access to their entire back catalog. anyway! i reference a lot of mixes throughout and i don't necessarily mean they perform it exactly like that as opposed to the originally released version, more.. thats the vibe i'd want the arrangement to channel

set list

instrumental intro - painkiller (w bc/cta industrial samples. basically would love to see alan get his grubby rat claws on this one)

first quarter: classic pechay mold - walking in my shoes (anandamidic mix) - policy of truth (think the way dave’s busting this out on mm tour is maybe its platonic ideal) - stripped (highland mix + 101 rlly going off with the giant sound pads)

second quarter: we r grooving - halo (no notes whatsoever. a setlist with express purpose of GROOVE and i could take lessons) - mercy in you (devotional. the way it’s a gospel disco hit in 1996..if you come up w a better way to arrange this lmk) - in your room (album version obv + apex mix as the outro which litr samples judas/leads into)

martin songs: wanna see that man suffering and healed - judas (grooving outro fucking required this is my huge and glaring shade on devotional lol) - home (alan could have fun w this one i think) - strangelove (starts w mm tour acoustic mart + finishes with full backing n shared lead)

third quarter: let’s have some fun! - shake the disease (a vault classic that i’d love to see them do something weird with) - nothing (101 guitar moment w the caveat i have heard rumors of a ‘devotionalised’ version that didnt end up on the setlist and if it truly fucks like i hope it would, then that) - john the revelator (influence of the unkle reconstruction aka that twinkling far out grungy thing. feel like mart on guitar and alan sparkling along the keys would be mmmmmmmm)

mart n dave duet interlude - sweetest perfection/condition mix (alright ive seen no one discuss this but these 2 share more than similar names!! i can hear it!!! and to get an a. wilder layered sonic journey..i wouldnt know how to act)

fourth quarter: we R grooving redux (R for haRd) - it’s no good (influence of hardfloor mix) - enjoy the silence (devotional/onip aka mart get nasty with that solo and dave be gay about it)(alright this is gonna be controversial for this blog but i think it’s gotta be the paris version for this show. it’s such a filthy solo and also imagine alan on the drums for it)(whos playing the keys bitch this is a fantasy) - nlmda (aggro mix intro + split mix Yes at least 10 mins of this song)

encore: oh y’all wanted to dance huh - personal jesus (funnily enough with how Much™ i want everything else to be, playing this one straight might be the highest camp experience it can give) - master and servant (101 sound pads and outro breakdown) - just can’t get enough (live in hamburg where they just fuck UP that 12”)

2nd encore: peche mode is a sad band, but the best band in the world - a question of lust (flood mix) - black celebration (101 w all its extra interesting lil sounds is a fav but i’d be SO open to a new alan take on this one) - everything counts (the graph/on the wall/the hand shake versions only. everyone else need not apply)(yes that means u devotional)

setting and era (musically/aesthetically)

as for the musical era, here’s the thing: if alan is present (and as it’s my dream dm show he is) i trust him to unify All This under some kind of cohesive performance. these are but humble suggestions of my fav arrangements. i’d say the underlying theme of my choices is High on the groove scale, but also very much wanting old school peche banging with hammers

outdoor on the lawn venue. ideally june 1, so it’s alans bday n dave hopefully won’t shut up abt it. looks-wise mftm/101 w shades of violator dark summer sexy. in high fantasyland: alan’s got that bisexual denim on leather look of drumming personal jesus in 89. mart’s tits are slipping out of that super low cut tank of 90 with the armband on. fletch is in his cunty mock turtleneck. dave’s in leather pants, a red tank n shirt and The Jacket that he gradually strips out of of (feels sacrilegious to not have him in a crop top in the late 80s so let’s just say his tank rides up a lil hehe)

mostly devotional visuals tho colorized less blue/purple lol, the big sans-serif Ms of memento mori were also giving for me. always love a dual-level setup for a dm show, but only if dave can traipse about both levels and flirt with whomsoever he chooses (which he will)

[glastly]

Hope you guys don't mind me just sharing songs I like every now and then... here's a list of songs I like and why I like them :3 for fun :3

You can definitely check out some of the songs if you feel interested!! You don't have to listen to ALL ofc but if any of my descriptions pop out to you, feel free to have a listen :]

- I rlly like this song!!! at first I was like "ooh, sick ass drum beat" and then I was smacked in the face with the sheer beauty of the vocals and bgm.. it's a very pretty song! makes me sad though

- This song is also very nice, MCR's slower songs make me feel a very specific type of emotional... gerard way's voice is just so so so good and I love the way he sings with emotion in all of the band's songs..... Plus I really like the guitar solo in this :3

- This is actually one of my favourite songs, I love EVERYTHING about it... It just ticks all my boxes,, and it makes me so emotional because of the lyrics and the guitar and UGH VIC FUENTES VOICE.... Very good, me fave song... maybe even my number one....

- ERM... AVril Lavigne is a big celebrity crush of mine she's very pretty and her live singing voice is INSANELY good, unfortunatley idk too many of her songs and only know the popular ones but this song is a classic and it makes me sad(iSEE THE WAY YUR ACTING LIKE YOURE SOMEBODY ELSE GETS ME FRRUSTRAATEDD😫/lyr)

- DID YOU KNOW THAT I DRAW HALF OF MY METTATON DRAWINGS WITH THIS SONG LOOPED IN THE BACKGROUND GAHHAHA I'm so basic but you can't go wrong with the QUEEN(gaga) she's literally perfect

- This song is just 2018 memories to me.. When I was 10 years old Sushush was my ABSOLUTE FAVOURITE artist and they did an animatic to this song and I loved it sm.. very nostalgic!

- This song is literally so omg. I dont know if anybody knows this but I was such a big akiangel person and I'd listen to this on loop for MONTHS because I was so obsessed with the ship HELP I love old songs.. plus this one's so catchy, 10/10

- Not many people really know this because I never talk about it but I'm a big J-hiphop fan and I lav home made kazoku... this song reminds me of year 8, itz very groovi

- I rarely listen to songs like this, but it's honestly fire and I listen to it pretty often.. AND UM.. I FOUND IT THRU AN OLD 2019 ANIMATIC MEME TREND HAHHW MAYBE YOUVE SEEN THE VIDS TOO

- Oh this song... I like arctic monkeys but I only know like two songs, but I LOVE how Alex turner doesnt "Americanise" his accent because I always see non american vocalists sing in a different accent than they speak in.. But anyway this song is very good, catchy bassline, catchy song, catchy everything. Def recommend! makes me nostalgic

[spacecowboyhotch]

Sweet Nothing: Mohawk

summary: joel had a rough day at work and you know just how to soothe him.

pairing: gn!reader x pre!outbreak joel miller

contents: a few suggestive comments, nudity, bathing together, grief/death of a partner, kissing, fluff

word count: 1.1k

an: ahhhh, welcome back to the sweet nothing universe, just more sweetness in this part. angst is comin’ soon.

sweet nothing masterlist | misc. masterlist | requests are open

part 1: the morning

Moonlight is flooding through the window and onto the words you can hardly focus on. Its position in the sky, and the brightness of its light tells you one thing. You already know, no need to glance at the clock as you had earlier in the evening.

He’s late.

Later than he has been a while. So late that you’d taken Sarah to the slumber party she’s been raving about for weeks by yourself. It’s her first one and you know that she wanted her dad there, but she also didn’t want to be late, citing that it would be embarrassing. But you’d promised her that he’d be there to pick her up the following day, hoping that it would be true.

The garage door rumbles through the walls and you smile without looking up. Joel is home and now this place is a bit brighter.

When he walks through the door you can see how hard the day weighs on him. His shoulders are low, and there’s still sweat on his brow. His clothing, a worn black t-shirt and faded jeans are covered in a thin layer of sawdust and dirt. It’s a staple of sorts in this house— his telltale scent of wood and various chemicals blending with the smell of a freshly baked loaf of bread sat on the counter and the citrus candle you have burning. Things just don’t feel complete without him in the mix. And now that he’s home, some tension you hadn’t even realized was sitting in your shoulders melts away.

“Hi, baby. Rough one?” You ask, placing one of the funky rainbow bookmarks Sarah made for you into the pages of your book.

He gives you a nod as he kicks off his boots and trudges into the kitchen. “This for me?”

You sit up on your knees to look over the couch, watching intently, “Once it’s cooled. Shower or bath?”

He eyes the loaf of bread, wanting so badly to cut into it– but he knows how touchy you can get about your baking and decides to wait until after he’s comfy and clean— your words not his.

“Bath. Join me?” He holds out his hand to you.

“Is that even a question,” You hop off of the couch eagerly, excited to soak in water so hot that you know he will complain. But it’ll loosen his muscles, and untighten some of the knots that you’ll further break down with a massage once you both are buried in the blankets.

You begin to wash his hair as soon as you both sink into the tub. And after you get his locs all soapy and sudsy, you make praying hands and quaff his hair up into a tall, spiky mohawk.

You lean back, appraising your work before giving out a satisfactory hum, “There you go. Perfection.”

He snorts, shaking his head as the edges of his lips twitch, “I look fuckin’ silly, I can feel it.”

You grasp his chin, turning his head side to side as if to make sure every hair is in place. “That you do, but, you could actually be in that rock band you claim you were in in high school.”

Joel clutches you closer making the water ripple as he nips at your earlobe, “The one I was in, you mean.”

“You can’t convince me that you used to sing, not with the solos you give me now,” You tease.

He glares at you in the darkness, but you can feel his playfulness in the way his fingers dig into your hips, “Never said anything about singin’ honey.”

“Drums? May explain why you decided to go into banging things for a living,” You’re only able to hold in your laughter for a handful of seconds before your chest bursts with it.

Joel gives your ass a playful smack, causing you to yelp as he scolds, “Get your mind outta the gutter.”

You reach for some soap and a rag, getting the cloth soapy before you start to scrub at his chest, “Alright, alright, so what did you play in this so-called band?”

“Guitar. I got one in the basement y’know, in all those piles of mess,” He nods his head towards the door before leaning back against the wall, enjoying the soothing feeling of you.

You narrow your eyes at him, continuing to wash his body with a tenderness despite your accusatory tone, “We’ve been together for how long and you’ve never played guitar for me?”

There are many reasons he hasn’t touched a guitar since Sarah was born. Some are small enough to be excuses— not enough time, he’s out of practice, no one to play for. But the last of them is huge and daunting, casting a faint shadow upon all the corners of his mind. The last person he’d played for was Sarah’s mom, when she was alive and well, eyes bright and heart beating.

Could he play again for someone who holds as much of his heart as she did? Could he play for you? The idea doesn’t hurt, not the way it used to.

So he simply says, “You never asked, honey.”

“I never knew,” You insist.

He shrugs, “I told you I was in a band. Your decision not to believe me.”

You can feel the change in his demeanor and aren’t sure which way he wants to go. More often than not, getting Joel to talk about his past, about his hurts is harder than you’d like it to be. Being with him has made you much more patient than you used to be.

“You’re a shy man, I was supposed to believe you?”

“I am not shy,” He denies, and when his fingers dig into your hips again, you know whatever heaviness had joined you two has faded away.

“Right, you’re serious— whatever that means,” You murmur, leaning forward to press a kiss to his cheek. After a few beats of silence, you speak again. “Would you ever play for me though? Is that something you’d be open to?”

There’s no hesitation in his response, “We might have to get the guitar restrung but I could give it a go for you.”

“You’re sure?”

“I’m sure.”

Silence fills the space between you. It’s not quite comfortable though you certainly wouldn’t deem it uncomfortable. Nonetheless, Joel can almost hear the way your thoughts begin to race. You’re always worried about him, about asking the wrong question or saying the wrong thing. That you’ll send him spiraling into the past, something both of you know he’s not completely equipped to handle. This silence screams unspoken words.

“Hey, get out of that head of yours,” He says gently, pressing a series of kisses to your temple. “I love you.”

You sigh— of course, he can tell. He can always tell.

Leaning forward you rest your face in the crook of his neck, mouthing at the skin there, “I love you too.”

part 3: midnight

taglist: @honeybrowne, @hotchs-bitch, @jazzelsaur, @campingwiththecharmings

[madneedshelp]

Breaking Point - Josh Kiszka x F!Reader

Summary: It feels like everything in your life is spiraling into chaos and failure. Well, all but your relationship, which is why you decided to go to your boyfriend, Josh, and his band’s concert despite all that’s weighing down on you. However, it all comes crashing down right in front of him on the one night you want to just forget about it.

Warnings: None really, lots of stress and angst but some fluff in there too

You stood at the side of the stage, hidden just far back enough to be out of view. Despite everything weighing on your shoulders at the moment, a smile was stretched wide across your face. Watching the guys perform could do that to you, erase all your worries.

In a weird way, they made you almost forget the real world. Forget that you’re a med school student just desperately trying to reach your end goal of being a doctor. No, at that moment you were just the girlfriend of a singer in an incredible band.

You watched happily as Josh danced around on stage with his brothers. It was always fun to watch them, they put on such a good show. Danny had his impossibly fast drum solos, Jake would sling his guitar behind his head and play, Sammy would switch from bass to keys and do so flawlessly, and you were always mesmerized by Josh’s singing voice.

The night flew by and before you knew it you were backstage waiting for the boys to join you. In your brief free time, you did the one thing you told yourself you were going to avoid: look at anything school related.

As you pulled up the app with all of your grades and emails from teachers, nervousness started settling in the pit of your stomach. Once the screen loaded everything plummeted in an instant.

You’d practically failed your midterm in one of your core classes for the semester. If you wanted to pass the course and stay on track, now you’d have to get essentially a perfect score on the final and the paper you had due next month, which would be nearly impossible with how harsh your professor graded.

To make matters worse, it appeared you had also received an email from the head of the research lab you interviewed with last week. Being in that lab would open so many doors for you and even allow you to be published before getting your M. D. Well, it would have. You didn’t get the open spot.

Tears were already stinging your eyes as you stared numbly at the phone. You’d put in weeks of work and it had apparently don’t nothing. You were going to have to find some way to bust your ass even more than you had been and put all you had into fixing your grades and possibly finding a new research lab.

The roar of cheering fans that signaled the end of the show startled you from your daze. You took some deep breaths and tried to calm yourself down, but you could feel an unavoidable breakdown racing toward you. Fuck. You just wanted one night to enjoy life and to not focus on the school that's taking over your life. It had been so difficult to make it to a show with your busy schedule and the boys' packed schedules, but here you were and you were about to ruin the night.

"Y/N! Glad you made it!" Sammy was the first to pop backstage, giving you a quick side hug before hurrying off to find some water.

"Good to see you, Sammy," You gave him your best grin, thankful that the interaction was brief enough that he didn't notice you were barely holding it together.

Danny and Jake were close behind Sam, mirroring his behavior almost exactly. That only meant Josh was soon to follow. Josh, your incredible boyfriend, who could read you better than anyone.

"Baby! You're here!"

As Josh rounded the corner, he beamed at you and rushed over. The smile you gave him in return was genuine. As cheesy as it sounded, nothing could take away the joy seeing Josh gave you.

"Wouldn't miss it," You grinned, dissolving into laughter as he picked you up and spun you around.

Your lips met his as he set you back on the ground, taking your sweet time with the kiss you'd been waiting months for. It felt so good to be with him again.

“Hey, this is very touching, but we should get going, you two! The drive to the cabin is a little long and I’m tired as fuck,” Sam poked his head around the corner.

You broke apart from Josh with a chuckle and the two of you went to gather your things hand in hand. Since you had a few days off school and the boys had a quick break in the tour, you had all planned to go on a quick trip to relax and spend some time together.

Once the bus was packed up and you were given the all clear to go, everyone cleared out. Since a bud wouldn’t exactly be ideal to navigate out to a cabin in the woods, Jake, Sam, and Danny drove in one car, which left you and Josh in your car.

“Want me to drive, Baby?” Josh asked as he put his bag in the trunk.

Ever the thoughtful gentlemen, you thought with a smile. “That’s okay, you’re probably wiped from the show, I got this.”

Josh frowned at you. “You also drove several hours today just to get here. Honey, let me drive this leg so you can have a break.”

You gave him a small smile and pressed a quick kiss to his lips. “Fine, you win. I guess I can let you take over for a bit.”

He grinned victoriously and snatched the keys from your hand. You rolled your eyes with a chuckle and climbed in the passenger seat.

Wordlessly, Josh grabbed the aux and started playing your usual playlist. You turned and stared at him in surprise.

“No John Denver?”

He laughed quietly as he pulled out of the lot behind his brothers’ car. “I listen to more than just him, you know?”

“Oh, wow, really?” You deadpanned. “Obviously I know that, it’s just usually he’s your go-to after a show.”

“Well, maybe I’ve been missing you lately and this makes me feel close to you, Mama.”

This damn man. “Keep talking all sweet like that and you might have to pull this car over.” You shot him a devilish smirk.

The corner of his mouth twitched upward in a matching smirk. “I’m not in much hurry to get to the cabin…”

A thought pops in your head and you can’t stop yourself. “No going at the green light girl, because I want to be with you now!” You sing at the top of your lungs in the most off key voice.

Josh’s eyes widened as he dissolved into laughter with you. It had been too long since the two of you had time for these antics.

“In all seriousness, Sam would probably kill us if we didn’t show up right behind them. Jake, too. We have the booze remember?” You nod to the back seat, which is filled with supplies for the evening.

He let out a huff. “You’re right. Unfortunately. Oh well, we have all night for me to show you much I missed you.”

You felt your cheeks warm and a flutter was sent through your chest. You’d been dating for literal years, but he still had this effect on you. “Such a flirt, Joshua!”

“Only for you, my love,” He grinned.

The ride seemed to fly by as the two of you got each other caught up on the events missing from your frequent phone calls. Well, all the events except your recent discoveries about your exam and research lab. You were happy, Josh was happy, tonight was just going to be about that.

In no time, the five of you had arrived, carried in your bags, and started the “festivities.” Jake had been dubbed bartender for the evening, which meant everything was going to be really strong. While Sam and Danny went the beer route, you joined Josh in having a salty dog. He loved them, but you had to admit they weren’t your favorite cocktail. The vodka, however, seemed ideal tonight.

“You know, I feel like whenever I hang out with you guys, I’m the only girlfriend here. I’m starting to think maybe your girlfriends don’t like me,” You sipped at your drink and gave the other guys pointed looks.

“Hey! You know that’s not it!” Sam chuckled.

“They’re also just busy, like you, Missy.” Jake tilts his glass toward you.

“Maybe you’re the one that’s not here when they’re here?” Danny shrugged.

You let out a laugh. “Oh yeah, that’s it, I’m definitely avoiding everyone.”

“If it makes you feel better, we barely have time to breathe right now, so no one really does anything with anyone.” Jake points out with a chuckle.

“Cheers to that,” Sam lifts his beer towards the group. “Sometimes I still can’t believe we’re making it work. Oh! And cheers to Y/N! She’s gonna be a doctor soon, saving lives and changing the world!”

“Cheers!” The boys chorus, but you’d frozen in your seat.

Soon. Probably not quite as soon anymore. But how would he know that? Sam didn’t know your progress with school was spiraling fast.

It was just a stupid toast, so why was it making you feel like you couldn’t breathe? You’d been holding it in all night, why was it about to burst out now?

You excused yourself and hurried to the bathroom down the hall. The door was barely closed behind you before the tears were pouring down your cheeks.

This was your breaking point. You’d put your whole self into med school. You didn’t go out and party, save for when you had breaks from school. You studied daily, turned in only the best work you could do, and stayed relatively involved with volunteering and such. All of that work, and you were still scraping by.

Sometimes it felt like you had nothing left to give. Like maybe you shouldn’t have chosen this path because maybe you weren’t built for it.

“Y/N? Baby, are you okay?” Josh’s voice sounded from the other side of the door.

The way his voice spoke, so softly and almost scared, it hurt you even more.

He waited a beat for you to answer, but you couldn’t form a response. “Baby, I’m coming in, okay?”

He gave you a moment for you to protest or ask him to wait before he opened the door and stepped inside. You watched his face fall as he took in your tear-streaked face as you held yourself tightly.

In an instant, he had his arms wrapped around you and was whispering assurances quietly. He held you like that until you calmed down, not prodding until you were ready to talk. Your arms drifted to his back, fisting his shirt in your hands. It helped in a weird way. Maybe because it felt like everything else was falling apart around you, but he was here, solid, an actual grounding force you had with you. Everything may have been shit, but you had him.

With a shaky breath, you stepped back and wiped your face. He didn’t even have to voice the question for you to answer him.

“I pretty much failed my midterm, and I didn’t make it into the lab. I might not graduate as soon as I thought now because I might have to retake the class. Josh, I…I don’t think I’m cut out for this.” You admitted, voice cracking.

He stepped forward and kissed away the tears sitting atop your cheeks. “Don’t say that, Baby. You’re so so fucking smart, and driven, and caring. You’ve talked about being a doctor ever since high school, and if anyone can make that dream come true it’s you. You’re the most incredible person I know. Don’t let this change anything, if you want this then I have no doubt you’ll accomplish it.”

You stared at him and felt a fresh wave of tears. “Josh…”

Panic filled his face and he wrapped you in another embrace as you cried. “Fuck, that was supposed to make you feel better, not worse. I’m so sorry, Baby, I just meant-l”

You shook your head into his shoulder. “No, no, it’s not that. You did help, I promise. It’s just…”Here it came, the underlying fears that were always in the back of your mind. “It’s just that what happens if I do make it? You’re a touring musician and I’ll be essentially living at the hospital. We’ll never see each other. I can’t lose you, Josh, I don’t want to lose you…”

Josh cut you off before you could voice any more of your paranoid thoughts. “You won’t. You’ll never lose me, I promise you that. We’ll figure out. No matter what it takes. Y/N, you are my everything, nothing in my life means anything without you in it. We’ve made it work for this many years, I’ll do it for the rest of my life, Baby.”

You were still crying, but now it felt more sourced from the pure love you felt from him. You leaned forward and kissed him, putting all the words you wanted to say into feeling. Josh was better with words than you, you never knew exactly how to tell him how much he meant to you. You hoped this would suffice.

Once you’d semi-tidied yourself, you felt like you could face the group again. Now that he knew you were okay though, Josh was ready to fight.

“I swear, Sammy is gonna-” He began to seethe.

You chuckled and put a hand on his chest. “Easy, tiger, don’t go bite Sammy’s head off. This isn’t his fault, he had no idea.”

“But he still made you cry.” Josh frowned.

“No, he didn’t, fucking med school made me cry. Now, let’s have a good time and enjoy our little trip before we have to go back to work. It’s bad enough we never see each other, I don’t want to waste the weekend.”

Josh let out a tired sigh. “Fine, I’ll drop it. But only because you want me to.”

“Thank you, Joshy. I love you.” You grinned and kissed his cheek.

That brought a genuine, Josh smile to his face. “I love you too, Baby.”