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crushedcoffeecups · 6 hours

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okay but imagine being a student of Saiki Kusuo's class. how fuckin weird would it be?

there's this guy, Saiki, that you don't know very well, but seems to be completely average in EVERY way. like, concerning average. you genuinely know nothing that he likes or dislikes or is particularly good or bad at. the only thing that sticks out about him is his weird hair clips and his tinted glasses. oh, and all the people that surround him

the weird, big, loud guy that no one really likes is his best friend. he basically follows Saiki around. one time Saiki made a completely to scale statue of him for a class fair.

the kid with a hero complex that is constantly going on about some shadow organisation and fantasy world is also his friend. the one that rips all of his clothes and always wears bright red bandages over his arms. he also follows Saiki around like they've been best friends since childhood. sometimes he talks about the both of them being soldiers in some army.

one day a psychic medium who can see ghosts and guardian spirits transfers to your school. the next day you see him hanging off of Saiki. what is it about this guy that attracts all these people? he doesn't even seem to talk to them. he's apparently the vice president of the medium's occult club.

the perfect dream girl of your class that everyone loves is weirdly obsessed with him. constantly trying to pair up with him in class. they've been seen on multiple dates together and members of the kokomins seem hate him. you're pretty sure they tried to kidnap him one time. he doesn't even seem to like the girl.

the over-enthusiastic class president that everyone respects is also his friend. you're pretty sure Saiki doesn't play any sports, but apparently he joined him on a tennis camp over the holidays. you heard that he hit a tennis ball so hard he sunk a boat.

an ex-delinquent joins the school, and immediately tried to be friends with Saiki. within a week he has joined the large group that follows Saiki around. one of your friends apparently saw the two of them taking motorcycle lessons.

the poor girl in class, the one with a dozen jobs who's constantly searching for food? yeah, she's friends with him too. one time you walk past a cafe she works at and see him inside, talking to the owner. what does he have to do with the cafe? and why was she wearing a maid dress? there's rumours in the school that the both of them took shady clinical trials over the holidays.

also, the girl who has a new crush every week gets weirdly into him for a while. you see her try a bunch of classic cliches to try to win him over. none of it works, but she still hangs around him for some reason.

a super rich guy shows up to your school and demands to date the beloved perfect girl. no idea why, but Saiki seems to some part to play in the weird love triangle. later on, you see Saiki and his friends visit the rich guys house.

a fortune telling gyaru joins your school, insisting that Saiki is her soulmate. the two are polar opposites, yet seem attached at the hip, along with that spiritual medium for some reason.

another new transfer (why does your school get so many transfers?) who never seems to shut up insists on following Saiki around. apparently they're childhood friends? they don't seem very friendly.

that famous actor, the one who is in everything on tv? you see him yelling at Saiki one day. something about a sister? you don't have any idea how they even crossed paths in the first place

on a random school day you overhear some of Saiki's friends talking about their trip to Britain together. did they really travel that far for just a weekend?

one day you see Saiki walking around with a young man with a weird headband. he looks familiar somehow. you could've sworn you've seen him on some science program or something.

you've seen Saiki walking around plenty of times. he walks everywhere it seems, and gets to places at a pace that is logically impossible. doesn't he have a motorcycle license?

his parents seemed perfectly ordinary when you met them, if a little too lovey-dovey. how is their son so different?

the dude never seems to change his clothes. obviously he does, seeing how they never get dirty or damaged. you guess he just wears the same thing on repeat.

you see him out and about with a little boy. probably babysitting. the kid keeps calling him by the name of some superhero.

the school brings in a magician one day. he greets Saiki like an old friend and calls him 'master'. you had no idea they knew each other, or that Saiki liked magic.

you've only known of this guy for a year, yet it seems like so much longer. it feels like too much has happened for the school year to have not ended yet. when did all those people transfer again?

feel free to add to the idea!

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cerisahh · 3 months

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WHAT'S YOUR HANDLE!

SYNOPSIS ꒱ social media/internet headcanons for the saiki k characters.

CHARACTERS INCLUDED ꒱ saiki, kaidou, aren, nendou, toritsuka, hairo, teruhashi, aiura, yumehara, mera, rifuta

NOTE ꒱ i love the saiki k characters so much they’re like a fond memory.

KUSUO SAIKI

• surprisingly, saiki has social media.

• private account, of course. 0 posts, 0 followers, 0 following, (12 follow requests which he will never accept).

• claims it helps him be percieved as 'average' (he's keeping tabs on his friends those nuisances that follow him around).

• enjoys baking videos! when he finds a recipe he likes, him and his mother will make it together.

• he's one of those people who use perfect punctuation and grammar whilst typing. never turned off auto-capitalisation.

• dry texter by choice, not by chance. he's less dry when he's speaking online to someone he actually likes, but not by much (by less dry, you get a sentence instead of a one-word answer).

• leaves everyone on delivered most of the time.

• tried changing his number multiple times, but someone always manages to get hold of it so he just gave up.

SHUN KAIDOU

• no one wants to say it so i will. he uses wattpad.

• tried to use ao3/fanfiction.net but found it too difficult so he stuck to his roots.

• he would definetly write paragraphs upon paragraphs of the lore of the-jet-black-wings and dark reunion, as well as the origins of the power sealed within his right arm (black beat) and why it is DETRIMENTAL that this power is never unleashed or stolen by evil.

• everyone in the comments think that it's just a cool original story idea.

• absolutely inserts his friends as original characters in his lore. i might make a whole seperate post about this.

• he also uses reddit. where else is he going to get story ideas?

• has these apps pin locked and hidden in his phone, on the off-chance his mother decides to look through it.

• ABSOLUTELY plays roblox, his username is something cringe he made when he was ten (like the rest of us), refuses to change it. account is -13 for some reason.

• he has spent a lot of money on roblox. a troubling amount.

• types in lowercase, except when he's talking to his mother, then it's all punctuation and manners.

AREN KUBOYASU

• still purchases burner phones even though his gangster days are over. old habits die hard.

• uses an ipad more often than not.

• plays roblox with kaidou, is a bacon hair. his messages constantly get filtered because he still doesn't realise you can't swear on roblox. warned almost everyday - on the verge of being banned.

• watches motorcycle tiktoks, it's literally all his fyp is. the comments he leaves are usually just questions relating to the specs of the bikes.

• is the member of the group that pays for netflix and disney+ and lets everyone leech off of him.

• reformed aren posts pictures of his friends and himself, it's actually a really normal page - which is his goal.

• pre-reformed aren would just post videos of him flexing, and all of his fights. there's a lot of fights.

• also: mullet pics.

• is on reddit SOLELY for the purpose of biker groups. could probably write a thesis on an single engine part. probably has. don't ask him to show you.

RIKI NENDOU

• this guy BARELY knows how to operate a phone, let alone the internet.

• only really uses his phone to google stuff and talk to his buddies.

• nendou... is so bad at spelling... like... SO bad.

• half the time nobody can decipher his messages it's just that horrendous.

• uses emojis, but doesn't open the emoji tab?? so he'll type the emoji he wants and then leave the word prompt in the message?? (ex: 'ramen 🍜 after school 🏫 ?')

• made a seperate account for koriki no.2 but just uses it as his own.

• his first time posting a picture of himself one of those ⓘ - generated by ai messages was under it. THEY THINK HE’S TOO UGLY TO BE REAAALL.

• unintelligible comments left on everything he sees.

• also likes everything he sees. his fyp/explore pages are filled with nonsense. nothing makes sense.

• there are a lot of cute animal videos though - this is a recurring theme.

REITA TORITSUKA

• sigh.

• falls for those ads that are like: 'horny women in the area ready to fuck'.

• REALLY?? WHERE?

• has a lot of malware downloaded without his knowledge.

• a reddit troll, there's no doubt about it. he LIVES to piss people off on that site. think colin robinson in that one episode (this is a niche reference).

• i regret to inform everyone, but before omegle shut down... he was a regular.

• probably has several failed business ideas. also has probably invested in cryptocurrency, bragged about his newfound riches, lost his newfound riches due to the market collapsing, and the cycle continues.

• says outrageous things on twitter. outrageous. one might even go as far as to say heinous.

• probably has hate pages made about him.

KINESHI HAIRO

• without a doubt has a gym bro tiktok account, might be a disciple of joey swoll.

• reposts those 'before and after' gym pictures with messages of congratulations to the person - he's so sweet. >_<

• probably has a couple thousand followers, a lot of people from his local gym follow him.

• contrary to popular belief, he doesn't type with caps on all the time. keeps auto capitalisation on and uses a lot of exclamation marks though.

• is the person who created the class groupchat. and the group chat of the ENTIRE school year. he literally added EVERYONE to it.

• follows everyone? like... people don't even know how he knows everyone but he does?? (he's just really friendly).

• there's multiple videos that he's tagged in of him doing kind things for people, hairo is such a sweetheart guys.

• uses his platform to give fitness advice to people. there's a lot of motivational quotes plastered on his accounts.

KOKOMI TERUHASHI

• of course teruhashi has social media, how else will she broadcast her beauty?

• she has SO many message requests, dedicates hours a day to respond to them to maintain her 'perfect pretty girl' status.

• posts once every week at a scheduled time, get's thousands of likes without fail.

• has a finsta for her close friends.

• doesn't have tiktok but somewhow still has fan accounts on there. and on every other site.

• is really into conspiracy theories, although she won't publicise this or her stance on anything either. she must remain neutral.

• her @'s and tags are mostly full of her fans taking pictures with/of her. she appreciates it, of course! but it's still strange...

• has her brother blocked (thank god).

• has numerous ootd highlights, the people eat it up everytime.

MIKOTO AIURA

• chronic pinterest addict

• unironically uses yubo (she needs help)

• her instagram highlights are so fun to go through, it's messy but it's a hot mess

• posts A LOT, like multiple times a day

• consumes a lot of yoga/meditation media.

• a lot of her media intake is different subcultures of gyaru (obviously), but she's really into haute couture.

• she actually streams on twitch sometimes, mostly to do online readings for people - she also does makeup tutorials and posts fashion advice!

• has also been banned by twitch several times for bypassing terms of service. (it's not her fault that the admins are sensitive).

• her most used app is probably spotify. has ayesha erotica in most of her playlists.

• she has a seperate account for her business, she posts newly decorated crystal balls each week and does free weekly readings in order to promote herself.

CHIYO YUMEHARA

• runs a semi-popular baking yt, (which saiki follows, to the knowledge of no one)

• used to post gacha life love story videos.

• might be the only person who knows about kaidous secret wattpad account (bar saiki obviously), reads everything he writes and inserts herself into his scenarios.

• types all cutesy and uses emoticons like there is no tomorrow

• 'hai hai everyone!! (^_^)' <- for example.

• buys sketchy stuff off aliexpress that promise the most ludicrous results (ex: she buys fat burning/slimming creams and expects them to give her a perfect beach body, gets confused when it gives her a rash and then buys more).

• has an etsy shop and makes custom jewellery (makes it free for her friends and leaves it in their desks with a custom note, it's very wholesome).

• her notes app is under LOCK AND KEY. that shit is more secure than the nuclear codes.

CHISATO MERA

• doesn't have a phone. can't even afford gas and electric, let alone internet. is poor.

• BUT IF SHE WASN'T!!

• would join giveaways even if they're obviously fake. she's desperate.

• miraculously end up WINNING ONE?? she gets flown out to be featured in one of those obnoxious youtubers videos and comes back with a fat paycheck and ridiculously expensive electronics (which she eventually sells, probably to pay the rent).

• is a reoccurring guest on yumehara's yt channel, as a taste-tester, obviously.

• was also meant to critique the food but she rates everything a 10/10 so was not very useful.

• her most used app? let's all be honest with ourselves, it's a food delivery one.

• has the most games downloaded out of everyone, mostly to entertain her siblings when they're bored.

IMU RIFUTA

• has a really cute and aesthetic tumblr - yet somewhow doesn't know what fanfiction is?

• dear god this girl uses everskies. she ABSOLUTELY uses everskies. has been banned several times.

• has so many throwaway accounts. like it breaches fifty, it's getting to be a problem.

• definitely argues with people on public forums, you can't convince me that this girl doesn't have festering anger building up inside her, arguing online is like a rage room for her.

• her phone layout is one of those aesthetic pink ones, she spent hours on it. hours.

• this girl is a MASTER stalker. has every social media under the sun, even the ones nobody has heard about in years.

• is unnervingly good at editing photos and videos.

• her alts are constantly getting suspended for harassment. has anonymously harassed saiki multiple times (he knows its her).

• everything she posts is really over-the-top with cutesy filters, like, blindingly so.

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