#zoomin with the homies

[hero-of-fortune]

outfit sketch dump <3 i had artblock so i put some outfit ideas on a wheel and drew what i got

Omu’s ratings

winter clothes: 1/10. He does not like snow. Cold bird

Swimsuit: 8/10. In his natural habitat! He loves ocean and swimming. He feels free. Flippers are amazing he zoomin

Silly robe: 8/10. He feels amazing and fabulous. Having a self care day with the homies

Dress: 7/10. Auntie cleo says it’s not his color. (I disagree) but auntie cleo does have the best closet

Baby bear onesie: 10/10. Baby bear. Baby. The cutest teddy bear. He’s papa’s baby bear (me and his parents will have to fight for custody)

[spaceshipsandpurpledrank]

BT Kingsley is WRONG🤣🙌🏽

[abiik]

also wait hold up did the new mando ep come out. im gonna go watch that to cleanse myself of ~man cooties~

[tambourmite]

✨Aunty Tam’s Tips✨

Part 3

The homeless are your friends- sorta.

The homeless are more trustworthy then the cops (well- about 2-5 cops in the police force are trustworthy but the rest, don’t trust em )

But it’s sorta kill or be killed vibes

If you disrespect the homeless on a daily basis, they will guarantee that you’re the next victim of Gotham’s Rogues

They’re practically information brokers

Give them some cash, they will tell you safer routes, or places to avoid

Sometimes they share some potential places where it might get attacked, but you gotta gain their trust for that type of info

Give em around 2-20$

Don’t give them lots of money on one go, they will scam you

Street musicians will know gossip, rumours, and small pieces from their crowd

Homeless street musicians = rare but ideal to go to (especially the older ones)

Rogues/villains will go and seek out the homeless for info and potential victims

If y’a snitch, you’re getting jumped by like 53 homeless dudes

But also don’t go outta ur way to seek them out, they will know u got ulterior moves

So let’s say you’re walkin’ down the street, and a homeless dude is begging for money, toss him 2 bucks (a toonie works for my Canadian homies)

A week later, the same dude stops him and tells you to take a different road, or warn y’a the cops are coming

If you rich, they won’t do this

They only look after the Gothamites from the narrows, are poor and usually the middle class

Ngl they some nice folks

Uncle Clerry THE NICEST OLD MAN U COULD MEET

Uncle Clerry is about 114 y’o, (idk how he still alive) and it’s honestly terrifying on how fast he moves

That motherfcker zoomin like usain bolt

He taught me how to play Clarinet 😭🥰

Everyone on the streets like to joke that he gets ALL the girls (mr steal yo girl)

But he actually just a very soft uncle/grandpa figure, I feel safe with him (almost all the woman in the area feel safe with him) he will beat up ur ex, abusive family, etc

He may look frail, but is terrifyingly strong

[shotani]

i know aho is fast but lil homie was ZOOMIN

[galactawhorez]

{yung cash register aka lil broomstick}

Thanks for the ride homie

[baku]

yeah don’t worry about it

{yung cash register aka lil broomstick}

so i’m thinking bout going on tour next year

[baku]

is that a cop car behind me?

{yung cash register aka lil broomstick}

yeah i think so

*police sirens*

[baku]

sheet

{yung cash register aka lil broomstick}

these mfs again 

[baku]

he really don’t want no smoke 

*baku rolls the window down*

|police 1|

you know why i pulled you over?

[baku]

it do not matter

|police 1|

BITCH B-BUDDY

you were zippin and zoomin through that damn neighborhood 

[baku]

alright so you dealing tickets or what?

|police1|

ima need to see that license and the 

R E G I S T R A A A A T I O N

[baku]

yall fuckin cops bruh

i aint got no license 

{yung cash register aka lil broomstick}

damn

|police 1|

new jailhouse just opened up

[baku]

yall better fill that bitch up then

|police 1|

where’s the registration?

{yung cash register aka lil broomstick}

its right here

[baku]

you don’t need to see that shit

|police 1|

step out of the car

[baku]

good

*opens the door and get out*

{yung cash register aka lil broomstick}

always on some 

D U M M Y     S H I T

[baku]

listen i gotta go pick up a pizza

|police 1|

what kind?

[baku]

B O N E L E S S 

|police 1|

you on drugs?

[baku]

i mighta been on that pack

|police 1|

you were going 

60 miles over the speed limit

[baku]

I   G O T T A   K E E P   I T   100

|police 1|

i can respect that

so you driving out here with no license?

[baku]

look i played gran turisumo 

{yung cash register aka lil broomstick}

drake

come pick me up this man baku fucking around with the cops

(drake)

that’s just all he know he don’t know nothing else

{yung cash register aka lil broomstick}

nah come on his bitch ass bouta get arrested 

(drake)

i tried to show him

|police 1|

so basically 

ima hit you with that bullshit tonight 

okay?

[baku]

ima have to say nah

|police 1|

you’re under arrest 

you have the right 

to shut that shit up

[baku] 

fuck it

|police 1| 

anything you say-

[baku]

Y E E T

|police 1|

damn it worked

|police 1|

we getting out of here

|police 2|

wassuh?

|police 1|

put on these glasses 

look

[baku]

that little situaaaaation 

|police 1|

YAINT GOIN NOWHERE BUDDY

[baku]

wtf

dawg

I O-BLITERATED YALL BITCHES 

|police 1|

IDK ABOUT THAT ON CHIEF

{yung cash register aka lil broomstick}

yeah come pick me up

[baku]

BULLSHIT THATS BULLSHIT

|police 1&2|

S U B J U G A T I O N  

{yung cash register aka lil broomstick}

yo come get me...

he on dat pack

idk wtf he though was gonna happen 

[vendettacanons]

23. Could you ever become your own hero? Is that a role you can fulfil or is it something you look to others for? -> Franklin

⚔️ Interview Questions with No Easy Answers | CLOSED ⚔️

“Man I gave up lookin’ for heroes to save me a while ago. Fact is, when you got bullets crackin’ at yo ass every day, yo moms ain’t tryna help you out because she’s too busy doin’ a couple lines, and the neighborhood pigs in blue would rather bust yo ass r pinch you for saggin’ than actually help you when you dial em because your homie down the street just got clapped, you can only keep lookin’ up at the sky for so long, ya feel me? I figured out all that Superman bullshit was bullshit pretty early on. Real life ain’t like what you see on tv— in real life you’re lucky if you even have a tv. From minute one I was aiming to get myself outta this mess. I ain’t no man in a cape, I ain’t no person talkin’ to the crowds like you see on tv, I ain’t got no catchphrase that sends me zoomin’ through the air, not then, not now, and not to anybody— not even myself. Superheroes ain’t real and I ain’t lookin’ to put myself in a position where I feel like I gotta save the day every day. I ain’t got the energy for it, bro.

I’ll admit, it ain’t something I exactly focus on when I sizin’ another dude up. But I do know a couple people I guess I’d call a superhero. I mean, they ain’t exactly packin’ muscles to be liftin’ cars, jumpin’ buildings, or wearing capes, but to me they’re still superhero’s. My boy Michael, my boy Trevor— they ain’t got the look for it to be wearin’ spandex, but they’re some of the roughest motherfuckers I roll with. They been through the shit, you know what I’m sayin’? Eeeevery motherfucker has wanted to clap my homeboys at some point, and they just keep shruggin’ it off. Now that’s what I call superhero material. And ay look, shoutout to my homeboy Lamar too— crazy motherfucker might not got any brains, by he got spirit. Ain’t never been a time I can say he didn’t show up when I called. Ya boy always picks up the phone, always comes to help creep on a fool when you need him. Ain’t no distance and no risk high enough to scare Thank lanky motherfucker— my brother, CGF homies for life right there. So yeah— I wouldn’t consider myself a superhero, nor do I want to be. But I see myself surrounded by them. And that feels good to have, not gonna lie— because even though I’ve saved these motherfucker’s asses more times than I learned to count, some days, I still feel like the boy who needs savin’.”

[my-life-is-decent]

“I crash motor bikes on a weekly basis and run from the cops, I’ll be fine”

----------

“Sounds shady,,, I’ll do it.”

-----------

“Don’t be the person to unsmuggle someone’s hawk”

-----------

“Romeo and Juliet... but gen z”

-----------

“Hey are you doing nothing this weekend? I was gonna ask if you were doing anything but nothing seemed more appropriate for you.”

-----------

“Why is there a goldfish in my pocket? Someone must have put it there...”

-----------

“Famous last words: I’m on a jog guys.”

-----------

*in an empty hallway* “hey guys we should start a riot.”

-----------

*yells jokingly* “FBI OPEN UP!” *two cops walk around the corner* “oh sh....”

-----------

“Hey kids, get your horses out of the house!”

-----------

“And it’s like, ‘sorry I don’t speak bro’l

-----------

“AHHHHHHH” “are they working out or giving birth??”

-----------

*dramatically sings “in the jungle” from lion king*

-----------

“I can’t help, I’m eating a cookie!”

-----------

“You so fake! I could buy one of you on eBay!”

-----------

“Go home, eat saltines, take a nap, wake up, eat salt.”

-----------

“My pinkie is a pancake.”

-----------

“How can you have an opinion on this place if you haven’t tasted anything”

*licks table* “this place sucks*

-----------

“You can probably smell the fear in my eye...”

-----------

“We ain’t losing today dudes! I’m a walking purse!”

-----------

“This is where the trailer park kids hang.”

“TRAILER PARK KIDS

TRAILER PARK KIDS

TRAILER PARKS KIDS UNITE!”

-----------

“Wait are we throwing money? Yes!”

“Wait no that’s my money, I stole it!!”

----------

“Hey quick reminder, please do not sit on the handrails. The handrails are my friends. You wouldn’t like it if I went to your house and sat on your friends, so don’t sit on mine.”

----------

“BITCH I AM UNDERWEIGHT GIVE ME THE CUSTARD”

----------

“Why won’t America’s biker gangs be more like Martin Luther king?”

----------

“Just one, okay? Now, please, tease me some more so I can kick you out and then you can fail algebra and I’ll come laugh at you while you watch your friends graduate without you.”

-----------

“This is different! I’m not driving a car! I’m driving a plane! It’s not like I’m meandering downtown, stopping for old ladies at stop lights! I’m taking off and trying not to yEET MYSELF INTO THE STRATOSPHERE!”

-----------

“Olivia NO!” *olivia proceeds to stick arms elbow deep in dirty water*

-----------

“Iced animal crack”

-----------

“Forget love, fall in coffee”

-----------

“You can’t irl brake check someone bro, get out of the way!”

-----------

“Your smile says hey but your eyes say dead inside.”

------------

“She said walking not running, what are you doing?!”

“ZOOMIN!”

------------

“Bro it’s national cuddle your homies day!”

“Really? I’m going to my homies tonight!”

“Bro you gotta go cuddle your homie.”

“I definitely will.”

------------

“Uncrustables are ravioli”

“Boil your uncrustables and make cooked ravioli”

------------

*drops a skittle* “oh... no... a gay...”

------------

*rumbling softly* “the washing machine is angry”

------------

“It’s none of your beeswax!”

“It is my beeswax!”

“You’re not a bee are you?”

“Buzz buzz bitch.”

-----------

“I was gonna ask if that was a dog but it was just a woman tying her shoe.”

-----------

“Why are you inspecting a frogs genitalia? Frog pervert!”

-----------

“Haha, catch these ankles”

-----------

“The air conditioning just went up my boobs.”

-----------

“This is the uno table, no one eats at the uno table, no one drinks at the uno table, and no one plays anything other than uno at the uno table. Adults have to put away their drinks and kids can’t have any toys. It’s for uno.”

-----------

Student: “GUYS, TEST IS OVER”

Everyone else: ...

Teacher: “guess no one wants to talk to you.”

Student: “yeah I get that a lot”

-----------

“How do you think my cactus felt?”

“Pure hatred cause you murdered it.”

------------

“No hair, don’t care”

------------

“Spicy is Just mouth bdsm”

------------

“Stars are just holes poked in the top so we can breathe.”

-----------

“The opposite of straight A’s is Gay B’s”

-----------

“Just wear mittens to hide your crab hands”

-----------

“I’m Swiss!”

“You piece of cheese”

-----------

“SUCK MY THICCC DICCC”

-----------

“Should I explain? I mean, I think everyone knows what a school shooting is.”

-----------

“I’m his favorite hoe”

-----------

“I wanna be blue”

“Blue?”

“Like a smurf. But not like an ommpaloompa”

------------

*imitating beetlejuice* “I’m a whore for Jesus”

------------

“Out of Santa’s three hoes, you are the first one”

“No I’m all three, tri-hoe”

------------

“It feels like there’s a bunch of teeth in my mouth”

“There is a bunch of teeth in Your mouth”

“I mean extra teeth”

-----------

"Boobs are not boobs if they are just nipples"

-----------

“You have a Swiss army penis”

-----------

“I’m gen z and i wanna hit stuff”

“I’m a millennial and I wanna kill my self”

-----------

“We are talking about a tiger! Not being Jewish, not Hebrew school, and not god without an ‘o’. Please do your work.”

-----------

“I don’t want a lot for Christmas, There is just one thing I need, I don’t care about the presents underneath the Christmas tree, I just want an A+ on my English final”

-----------

“I love the smell of exhaust at 3:30 in the afternoon”

-----------

“DAMN! Someone smells like a whole ass meal!” “Like a whole ass Olive Garden!”

[theresnodoh]

Morning. (long post about dreams I had do not read)

I had a fucking wild ass dream. Lemme see if I can articulate it rq. I can't remember all of it at once in order but I'll just say what I do remember in bits and pieces.

Imma start with the last thing. So I think I went back in time or just somewhere to some giant castle lookin place. They were having a ceremony to decide who'd be in charge and have a lot of power for the surrounding area and I just remember there being an all out cannon battle with my side shooting endless cannonballs against defenseless Europeans in their castles or something. They stood zero chance as they were absolutely fucking OBLITERATED and I took control of the area. At the same time there was some serial killer worm dude who was kinda like earthworm Jim except he didn't have a whole ass buff suit it was just a regular body and a worm head. He was the homie tho. So we're kickin it and exploring the land around us n shit and each room I went it was like someone or something I knew of in either the past or just random shit that's in my head and the worm dude was plotting to get rid of a bunch of things idk.

Earlier in the dream i remember being in what appeared to be a hotel or motel in Las Vegas which is fucking weird because I live here why tf would I be in a hotel or motel that's fucking dumb but ok. I'm in this mf in and out of going outside for the pool n shid and for some reason I was smoking a cigarette which is also weird because i don't smoke nic so I'm like "wtf I don't do this" but that's whatever.

Ok last part. I was in Target or some sort of supermarket/pharmacy/store idk. I was going there to work and for some reason was wearing rollerblades. ROLLERBLADES! I've never rollerbladed in my life but I have rollerskated and i was ZOOMIN around the store. don't remember much but I remember my coworkers being dicks and I just left.

Yeah that's all i remember there was a bunch more stuff but I don't have the mental capacity to try and remember it ALL. dreams are weird.

[qualitystart]

CARBS

i forgot there was a game going on bc i’m zoomin’ with the homies so i was like “how did you know what i’m eating for dinner” and then i realized pasta scored

[spaceshipsandpurpledrank]

Tony Baker Had BRAIDS?! 😩😭

[whitthedrummer]

The homie @alonzodoll captured me out here zoomin in these Boston streets from work. 🏍🏍🏍