#zoomparody

[smiley-virus-2020]

Eating whole meals on Zoom is the new microwaving fish in the break room. We've all both hated this person and been forced to be them. 

Here's, "Before He Eats," to the tune of, "Before He Cheats," by Carrie Underwood. 

Right now, he's probably slow cooking

Some chicken and rice 

And he's thinking that it's risky

Right now, he's probably buying

Up some premade salmon glaze 

Cause he won't use whiskey 

Right now, he's hankerin' for some fries

With a drum stick

Going out now to buy a combo

And it's all shown

He dug his teeth into the sides

Of his three course little meal left from last night 

Carved up ham and other kinds of meats 

I look at our agenda this can't be right 

I hope this won't go all four hours

Maybe this Zoom call ends before he eats

Right now, he's loudly chewin' on some

Bad trash version of his grandmother's gnocchi 

Right now, he's probably drinking old milk

And he's a-hiding that it's gotten real funky 

Right now, he's sloppily

Gobbling down three gallons

Worth of some half chilled Jello

Oh, and it's all shown

And it's all shown

He dug his teeth into the sides

Of his three course little meal left from last night 

Carved up ham and other kinds of meats 

I look at our agenda this can't be right 

I hope this won't go all four hours

Maybe this Zoom call ends before he eats

I might have seen a little dribble and I could hurl

And the next time that he eats 

Oh, you know that I just might leave

Oh, I might leave

I dug my key into the side

'Cause he dug his teeth into the sides

Of his three course little meal left from last night 

Carved up ham and other kinds of meats 

I look at our agenda this can't be right 

I hope this won't go all four hours

Maybe this Zoom call ends before he eats

Oh maybe next time he'll think before he eats

Oh, before he eats

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