thebestdangcopever

[thebestdangcopever]

“Whoooohooo! Got my official invite to the neighborhood block party today!”

“I’mma be runnin’ the snack table. I picked out five different kinds of cheese for the crackers. Jeanette doesn’t like cheese, so I’m tryin’ to find a vegan cheese for her. Vegans don’t eat cheese. Did you know that? I jus’ learned that.”

[thebestdangcopever]

“Ya’ll will never guess where I found blondie.”

“She was under the backseat! Got me in the face with silly string too! Oooh boy, what a day.”

“But it was kinda fun.”

“Today’s been an interesting Sunday.”

“First, Alvin woke up at the crack of dawn to climb on the roof and watch the sunrise. Theodore heard him and thought he was the boogyman.”

“Then, Simon and I played a game of Trivial Pursuit which was interrupted by Geizmo running into the room screaming about Warbie knocking down his Lego castle.”

“After that, the Chipettes stopped by for lunch and Eleanor pranked Alvin with some hot sauce filled pizza rolls as a late April-Fools joke.”

“Simon accidentally pulled a muscle in his back and I had to rub ointment on him.”

“Derek showed up with Eleanor for round 2 of the pranks. My car was covered in silly string.”

“I called Officer Dangus and he made Derek and Eleanor apologize and then took them for a ride in his cop car.”

“I got a call from him 30 minutes later saying that he lost Eleanor.”

“By dinnertime, I was about ready to fall over, so I took a nap on the couch. I woke up with Brittany testing her new makeup on me.”

“There was more, but I think you get the idea. Never a dull moment with my family.”

[thebestdangcopever]

Theodore has gifted you all with a new mini fic!

It’s got the whole family in it! And a big Miss. Miller moment you won’t wanna miss!

https://archiveofourown.org/works/48784018/chapters/164455045

[thebestdangcopever]

“Dave had to leave in a hurry this mornin’ and he asked me to come over and help the kids get ready for school.”

“WHOOOWEEE! MY FIRST OFFICIAL PARENTING DUTY! Time to show off my skills!”

“I know it’s just packing lunches and stuff, but it feels HUGE, ya know?”

[thebestdangcopever]

“Life is SWEET!”

“I heard there was a winter scavenger hunt downtown and I’m ‘bout to ask Dave if he and the kids wanna go.”

“I bet we’ll have a darn good time!”

[thebestdangcopever]

Here's the Christmas story this year! It's Dave and Officer Dangus focused, but it's still got some of the kiddos in it too!

Happy Holidays and Merry Christmas!

[thebestdangcopever]

"I caught myself a songwriter! He's the best catch in the whole darn pond!"

"After years and years of waitin', it finally happened!"

"I'm not sure how to say this....so I'll just...come out and say it."

"Doris Dangus and I are officially...dating!"

"He asked me out on Christmas Eve and it was a huge surprise. We've decided to try things out."

[thebestdangcopever]

"You know, if I was in that Home Alone movie, Kevin wouldn't have needed to rough up them burglars. I would've found them and given them a swift kick in the pants!"

[thebestdangcopever]

“I find myself stoppin’ a lot of shoplifters at this time of year.”

“Black Friday was a hoot! People lose their darn minds!”

“I ain’t never seen Ms. Croner jump that high before. I guess she really wanted that new blender.”

“What’s she even gonna use it for? Probably cat food puree. Icky.”

[thebestdangcopever]

“Wishin’ the Miller girls a fantastic Chipette Day!”

“I got a little somethin’ for you three down at the station. You can pick it up after school.”

[thebestdangcopever]

“What I supposed to do when daddy goes camping?”

“I hope that old lady with the cats don’t watch me.”

“She scary. Very very scary. Like a witch.”

[thebestdangcopever]

“Guess who’s the official babysitter for Simon’s robot? This guy! What can I say? I guess I’m great with kids!”

“They also want me to watch a bird, a mouse, a dog, and another robot. How hard can it be?”

“I hope Dave and the kids have fun campin’!”

[thebestdangcopever]

“I’m pleased to report that the crime rates this summer are low low low.”

“Time to ask the chief about a vacation.”

“Might have a cookout with the fam’ for the 4th of July.”

“It’s gonna be quite the shindig, if ya catch my drift.”

[thebestdangcopever]

“I went to see a psychic for romance advice today.”

“She said I gotta follow my heart and go for it.”

“Am I ready for that? I don’t think I’m ready for that!”

“We ain’t just talkin’ about my life, we’re talkin’ about the lives of my crush’s family too! What if they don’t want me? What if HE doesn’t want me?”

[thebestdangcopever]

“Somebody oughta tell that little pigtailed girl to mind her own business before she gets hurt.”

“I caught her snoopin’ through case files AGAIN.”

[thebestdangcopever]

“I’m a very busy guy, cuz I got cop duties and all that.”

“However, I’m gonna try and post on here more often.”

“That sound good?”

[thebestdangcopever]

“What was with all that boop bopping yesterday?”