theploymaker - Tumblr blog

[theploymaker]

You haven't been properly inducted into the polycule until they've invited you to their minecraft server.

[theploymaker]

Donating all my "More like Floppenheimer" T-shirts to Africa like they do with all the shirts for the superbowl losers.

[theploymaker]

Pronouns aren't just things you can apply to yourself as you please. They are given by the National Pronoun Gacha system and if you get an ultra rare pronoun you can turn it in for gender points and the person with the highest gender level is gay president.

[theploymaker]

There's an often misinterpreted idea when it comes to media criticism. People often use Death of the Author as a catch-all to say that their interpretations are just as valid as any other when that's not necessarily the case.

Death of the author, in actuality, is the idea that once an artist puts a piece of art out into the world, they are to be killed for the crime of having made art. Wallow in eternal procrastination and destructive perfectionism like the rest of us.

[theploymaker]

ACAB includes late 70's/early 80's rock band The Police.

[theploymaker]

The lightning mcqueen dakimakura is ironic I sleep with it every night in commitment to the bit and also the boner is ironic

[theploymaker]

Y'all leaving twitter? Couldn't be me, I gotta up my numbers.

[theploymaker]

Elon Musk's hell brought on by his own hubris is cool and all, but I really wish it was my fault instead :c

[theploymaker]

I can't believe I was called a wojak by the richest man on earth because I don't see the appeal of 8 dollars a month for half the ads.

[theploymaker]

Fun fact:

There are approximately 370 days in a year.

[theploymaker]

Hi, Ursula the Sea Witch of Sea Witch Fashion and Vogue Magazine. Purely hypothetically, if you could give me your voice for something your soul desires, how likely would you be to take up such a transaction?

how to not have a bad voice qwq

Remind yourself “it’s not a bad voice, it’s just not your preferred type of voice”

I always disliked how my voice sounded when I started, and yet some others thought otherwise.

Now I semi tolerate it

[theploymaker]

Hey, can I commission you for some art?

I don't have... money, but I can pay you in other ways ;)

The other ways are:

Depressing roleplay

Kickboxing lessons

I know how to play an e minor chord on guitar

Cat pictures (I will blur out his face to protect his identity)

I will close my eyes, walk around my house, and ship you the first thing bump into

[theploymaker]

WARNING: TRANS HACKERS ARE TRYING TO PUT S-TROJANS IN YOUR COMPUTER

[theploymaker]

A mashup I made of Neil Cicierega’s “Two Trucks having Sex” and Peter Gabriel’s “Sledgehammer.” Works a little too well. Sorry about that.

[theploymaker]

Me: Get a load of this guy.

The person I just came inside of: I'm gonna need you to unfuck me.

[theploymaker]

The new Pokemon player characters look like they’re here to tell you about the third book in the Bible Trilogy

[theploymaker]

The alternative is you can create a shrink ray or a computer using your bare hands, a tree nut, and a rock.

The pokemon franchise has always had a foundational element of pokemon being converted into data. This is how they fit in the pokeballs, this is why you store them in a PC, and this is the in-universe explanation for how they can be traded through cables, wireless signals and over the internet.

Obviously this element is only possible because pokemon is a franchise set in the digital era... Which is how the canon-keepers ran into a problem when they made Pokemon Legends Arceus, a game set well before the digital era.

The game dances around it alright enough, you store the pokemon in a pasture instead, and trading is instead represented as the physical pokeball launching into the sky like a rocket.... But the pokeball itself remains an issue. How do they explain the pokemon fitting in there in an era before digitization?

They straight up say pokemon can just shrink. All of them can just do that.

This is the most confusing line in the pokemon franchise and it breaks 25 years of canon.