toehwa6

[toehwa6]

Feeling really good so I’m posting some of my wins so when I get sad or self hate I can look at that

I’m not listing context you’ll get it

First holy fuck getting that stupid fucking song from Billie

Which then led to all the songs, beats, and now Billie wants to make even MORE music

So hell yeah

I was going to say this later but now look here look listen

I was dealing with anxiety shit like, I don’t want friends because you can have confrontations, and it could be bad

But fuck that I take what I want

So I’ve been leaning super hard into a bunch of new shit and trying to be myself as much as possible

Part of that is telling Billie I think he’s a fucking idiot

I finally feel like I have the faith or trust in myself that when I want to say something even shitty or whatevs it’s okay

Billie has this problem with spontaneity where he refuses to have any type of plan whatsoever when going into a creative session

He wants to “capture the moment”

Sorry Billie, you’re an idiot

That is called, let’s throw a fuck ton of nothing at a wall and hope we like it enough to claim it’s significant

No Billie, the right way to do this is to have a plan, and then be spontaneous

Anyway, I’m brave enough to talk to Billie!

He’s also suckin way too hard when it comes to important people. More to come on that!

Anyway, reconnected with some other good friends

(One I’m hopefully seeing this weekend for the first time in years. His name is Cack)

The other friend however is someone who was a best friend and we did a lot of creative things together

When we chilled, I straight up told him I’m a monster with this shit, mainly wanting money

So he was like well fuck me and my gf make music and we’re like fuck we gotta monetize this shit

So I said

Let me monetize that shit

And he said

Okay

So now we are starting a business together that I 100% believe in

I set up to where if we follow protocol and just do the thing, we can’t fail

It’s going to be very good. Im very excited

All these things happening is keeping me from wanting to die

My back still hurts really bad

I told some guy at a BIG DICK INSTITUTION no when he told me to do something

Everyone at work literally cheered

I said some fuck shit and a coworker called me out but I was like fair but I was feeling myself

(He was a clergyman and I said you ain’t even part of a treatment team fuck outa here(I was at a mental hospital)(don’t tell anyone)))

So that was a thing

Had another shit visit at another hospital. Talked to a few very nice but very sad people

Staff were all fuckin idiots. Got to tear them to shreds in a report

Fucking love doing that shit

Not even a power thing I like making sure people follow protocol. Plus you get to rip them apart if they fuck up

Crushed this meeting too

We do these dumb fuck introductions everytime that take up an hour of our 1:30 meeting

So I hit the bitch up and was like

Yo I gotta leave early, can we do the important shit first?

Gave my presentation, had a good meeting; stayed til the end lmao

But naw I’m running that bitch

This Jordan petterson like stays in my head in these situations

“If you stop taking credit, you can do whatever you want”

Very confusing

However what it’s making me see is that people won’t see your work, but the real ones will. And those are the ones that count

I want to build a reputation that I’m a fuckin monster with this shit I don’t give a fuck

Realistically people are seeing me as driven and passionate

I think, what if these people knew what I thought

What, that you don’t like them? Shut the fuck up pussy deal with it

And look at that. Leaned heavy into my shit and it’s working out

Just have to play the game

Whole buncha wins lately

Met some really cool important people. They laughed at all my jokes lol

Hella projects comin, hella music, hella good times!

Don’t even feel like I have to “ride this until it dies”

Just going to try and continue being happy and driven

I will soon be depressed, but this is evidence of otherwise lol

Thanks

[toehwa6]

Journal journal journal

I’m reading nausea rn and it’s making me want to

I had a really good day today

Yesterday my back was fucked and I had a migraine but today I was like fuck that I’m gonna crush this bitch

I had a review coming up so I was excited about today

Get up to go to work. Battery in the car is dead

Fuck

Start that shit again. Car clunks and check engine flashes

Fuck

Try again

Normal

Fuck lol

So anyway I go to leave and my Bluetooth is reset because of the battery shit

Cannot connect my phone

End up listening to just my phone playing music on the way to work

Fuck it

Not letting this shit fuck with me

Just gonna be one of those days I guess

Fuck it

Get to work

First meeting

Meet my dick head boss and going over our year and he’s like what can we do better

Me and my partner say literally nothing

He’s goes, well, there’s always room for improvement

Like guy fuck out of here lol were killin it wtf

Anyway, next meeting

We’re talking about shit and this bitch from work is late to the meeting so misses what we talked about

Literally says like 3 different lines about how we have to wait for her

Shit like, “ see that’s why you have to wait until I’m here”

Bro, my boss fucking LOSES it

I told him later like bro you’re a gentle guy to see you lose it is crazy

He goes off about how she’s not entitled to the shit we spoke about because she was late. She’s like my tire blew and he goes that doesn’t matter at ALL.

Bro shut her ass the fuck down I noticed like midway through I was staring at the floor lmao

Anyway meeting goes on it’s dope

Have to write a summary for a field incident report

Do my evaluation

Literally kill that motherfucker as hard as I fucking could

Told my mothetfucking boss I’ve been killing it all fuckin year and I deserve fuckin praise

Praise being my sheet being marked extraordinary vs above average lol

I used to be like yo I’m a good worker but I’m like still a piece of shit you know

Fuck that. Not anymore

Told my boss I finally have faith and trust in myself with this shit

Told him about all this shit I’ve done

Told him about how much of a fucking solution guy I try to be

Told this motherfucker so much that I was proud of and he said “Alright! You convinced me!”

He called me a valuable asset and said he was really proud of how far I’ve come

So fucking happy I fucking killed that shit

Next write incident report

Kill that shit too hopefully this place gets fucking slammed

Cool because my summary gets sent to the very fucking top so I needed to make shit tight

And I’m like recording mistreatment in a fuckin DOJ rehab it’s crazy

Killed that shit

Read this fuckin article about how DHS bitch is gettin rekt

Happy that I’m treated like an equal when I talk to these guys

I feel like I really earned it

Crush work

Have to get home and go to PT

When I get home my 40lb bag of bird seed is here

Fuck it. I need that shit.

I lug that shit the fuck in and feed my fucking birds

Killed it

Go to PT

Back is fucked. Hurts to walk. Literally dying

Crush PT

Feel fucking great

In like to get my work out meal and the homie calls me and he’s like what’s up

I tell him fuck it I’m gonna be an asshole and just talk while I order my food

Say I’ll call this bitch later and hang up

Turns out I was screaming the whole time

Get my food

Home shower meal

Crush it

Call the homie back

Have one of the best conversations I’ve had with someone in a while

Just a nice neutral talk about whatever

It felt really good to just listen to someone

Talked about him getting a house and doin his adult shit

Talked about my shit

Both bonded on how we’re like fuck it I’m doin me lol

Then I asked him a philosophy question

I asked if the benefits of having friends is worth the bullshit that comes with it

He went on for awhile about a friend of his who’s annoying but he don’t drop him cause he’s a friend

We both agreed that having friends is fine as long as it’s on your own terms type shit

I talked like how I like setting up hangouts like appts

I was really happy he called

I told him about times where I think about calling him but I don’t

And he said, hey man, if you’re sitting around thinking about me waiting for me to call, you call

Like bro realest shit I’ve heard someone say in a while

I’m like trying to let it hit me and sick in

I’ve been thinking about this quote from a book I’m reading

This guy just jerks him self off being depressed

But he says this about a song he really enjoys

The whole book is bim bitching until he hears this song

I’m trying to articulate what he was getting at but I’ll just say this

It’s not the music or the song, it’s the being

He says

“How strange it is, how moving, that this hardness should be so fragile. Nothing can interrupt it but anything can break it.”

You can stop playing the song, but do you really stop the song from happening

I don’t remember the last time I thought of something like this so much

I went as far to memorize that quote

Fucked it up and had to fix it but the intention was good lmao

I hate the book but I get it so it’s easier to deal with. But reading this made me happy.

Really just trying to be cool and sit in this day

I did everything right. And now I can just chill

I’m happy I wrote this. My hand fucking hurts and I can’t cube now but fuck it

Really good day

Thanks

[toehwa6]

Just had a great convo with my friend dac

I want to try and recap it to remember cause I’m on drusg rn

I can’t remember what we talked about first

WW2

DEW

Nazis in the arctic

Secret tech

Not aliens

Def not aliens

Geometric Unity

Jelqing

Politics

Abortion in the local levels

Dac does not believe in Jan 6th

People treatin trump all bad and stuff

Bigger picture stuff tho

People running the media machine

9/11 missing money

CIA

Should’ve taken the train

Our relationships

All about dacs goals and life

I really enjoyed that

I hope I remember it fr

Dac is my hero in a lot of ways

I’ve never met someone so ambitious and driven

By the same exact feeling I have but more

Def a douche and a bad person sometimes, but one of my best friends and really my fav person

He gets fucked all the time and I just want him to be the best ever

He’ll get his fucking shit I know it

Very good

We also talked about you know who about the you know what but that’s for another time

[toehwa6]

I used to be #afraid of stickering Rubik’s Cubes

BUT.. I OVERCAME

And they all turned out really well

Here are the cubes. Hope you like my lil shelf with my plooshies

Cubes are

Lucas Etter LE Aolong - first sub-5 single cube I think?

Transparent Tengyun - I’ve had this bitch forever happy it’s fr now

Gan Kun - yeah you know what the fuck it is this puppy got stickered too and looks AMAZING

Super pumped

Btw I have SUCKED at cubing recently. Making me very sad

Hopefully I can get better soon

Feel like I’m actually getting good at this shit

First counting 8 the other day. Still no 9 ao5 lol

Maybe I’ll start posting solves here

Mm bye

[toehwa6]

Hey tumblr fam I have recently been talking to some #NEETs and #hikis and wanted to write some advice on how to be more social and not afraid lmao

Hopefully this convo will help someone

First, OP posted a video diary about how exposures were really helping here.

Here is that vid. I think it’s very much worth the watch

Shout out this bitch

Anyway, I congratulated her and this conversation with another person followed.

All of this is copy and paste from Reddit

Me: Yo former hiki here good fucking job dude congratulations

Exposures suck but have amazing outcomes. They’re what got me to be better too

Keep this shit up you have the mindset to thrive. Just keep doing what you’re doing fr you’re killing it

And yo keep making these vids they could be helpful to someone

Guy: Congratulations Man...👍

How to have the Spirit while talking to someone???

Have your Started Having Friends and Relationships???

If yes , than How did you started?

Me: Yo here you go

First of all you need fuckin confidence and self esteem. Both of these are achievable. Hard as fuck but once you get rolling you’re good.

You build confidence by being good at something. You need to have something to be proud of. So no matter what even at your lowest you can say you have something.

If you don’t have something like this. That’s the start. Find something you like doing, and get good at it

Confidence doesn’t need to come from fucking money or having a job

It’s about being the best you can be and believing in yourself

Yo fr, being confident is fucking hard. But I faked it til I made it. All that shit you feel like “oh fuck, what if this goes bad, or they hate me”

Fuck that. Someone confident wouldn’t worry or give a fuck about that shit.

Be your fucking self. As long as you’re not a fucking weirdo, you should be good.

And yo, even if you are a weirdo, find out what makes you weird and address it.

I believe in being yourself, but that doesn’t mean you need to keep bad habits. (Especially shitty personality habits like negative thinking)

How to make friends

Do all the shit I just said, but now put yourself in a social situation

This is most easily done by finding something you like, then joining a community for that thing

What fucks a lot of people up is trying to get ANY FRIEND ASAP, same with bitches

NO. People are people first, not your friend or a partner. They owe you nothing.

Don’t look for friends. Find people you enjoy talking to, and then try to keep talking to them.

If you look for ANYONE, someone is going to take advantage of you and fuck you over. Or they’re going to be a piece of shit that has a reason for no one else to be around them

Yo I literally just shit this out so sorry if it’s wacky. This is the general map I followed

Make yourself interesting and be the best you can be

Literally everything else will come with self progression

Also watch this girls video it’s will very much help you.

Guy: 😂😂😂 Lol , One of the Greatest and Funniest Roadmap for a Hiki😂👍

Thanks for this Man...You seem to know how to talk and How to tackle the objections that might come in people's mind while Reading what you wrote👍

2 things I wanna Ask you , and I hope I am not being , I don't know what it's said in English , a Chewing Gum that stuck😂

1 is , I really don't know about the boundaries of people , what to say and what not to say...and am bad at communication , obviously as a Hiki lol

so How should I be interesting yet not to offend anyone?

2 I don't know what Girl's video are you referring to...is it about Pick up artists?

Cause that's Hell of Difficult for someone who is afraid of People😅😅😂

But yeah , all in all Great advice , this might workout with exposure therapy too...What do you think about that?

Me: Here are my answers. I apologize if they are brief. I just don’t have time to write a full plan rn lmao

1. ⁠This all comes from experience by taking “constructive risks”

Think about this, when you go to talk to someone, you get that fear of like, oh fuck this is scary what if they hate me or mean whatever

BUT, what if it goes good?

I think the benefits of this shit is worth the stress of trying.

I would try and take an easy route such as a shared hobby, or a safe community space. There are places like this, even if it’s a library that has events, or a community center for events etc.

You NEED to put yourself out there. The more you are by yourself the weirder your world view gets.

People and the world are 100% different. (Most of the time lol) and there ARE some good people out there.

Don’t go out looking for friends. Go out and look for a nice conversation with somebody.

If you want to take baby steps. Fr go and be polite to people.

If you’re out and about, hold the door for someone. When say thank you, say you’re welcome back. Use manners to be more comfortable honestly.

If you are at like a cash register, and you want to make a comment, that’s OKAY!

I often tell people I like their outfit(shoes, nails, etc)

You can ask just a simple question like “how is your day going today?”

Just something to make you comfortable. Just be polite and nice and people will be cool.

Try not to be weird lmao! Literally just second guess what you are about to say before you say it.

Honestly, I’m sure even with lack of experience, you know what is appropriate or inappropriate. Just be cool.

QUESTIONS 2

Naw guy the video on this post! OP made a video journal talking about exposures and putting yourself out there.

Go watch that video, and really listen. What she’s saying is 100% true.

And yo fr, none of this shit is easy. And you’ll be very scared for awhile when you start.

But fr it’s worth it. And you can get to where you want to be just by being consistent with your progress.

Good luck my guy! You will be social soon :)

Edit: I appreciate your kind words. I try my best to be mindful of others situations. Have a nice day and if you have a question just ask :)

Edit 2: sorry I keep checking shit. Exposures SUCK but will CHANGE YOUR LIFE

Imagine not being scared to go places or talk to people.

You get better by proving to yourself that shit is okay. You do that from trying shit that you’re afraid of.

Don’t be afraid. It’s supposed to suck and be scary.

Again lol, good luck!

Guy didn’t respond yet. If this convo continues I will come back and edit.

Hope this helps someone

[toehwa6]

Hehe I’m writing something because my #therapy isn’t #WORKING

So I’ve been doing this thing where I cry at any type of emotional situation and I can’t tell if it’s bad or not

I’m not doing any crazy shit like breakdown and it’s fr not depression

I’m literally just getting emotionally overwhelmed

I don’t think it’s bad

Like here’s some examples

I’m watching krapopolis rn and I cried at deleria beating Athena

I cried at Pitt beating WV the other day

I cry at music and shit or people telling me shit

I’m happy that I feel like I’m not doing the make it about yourself crying

Like omg YOUR story is affecting ME now

My therapist said it’s like extreme empathy

Here’s where it gets kind of annoying but even then like not in a bad way I think

So fr I can’t go to pet stores or like zoos/shelters basically anywhere where there’s an animal in a cage

I went to look at dogs in a pet store with my gf cause she wants a chihuahua but I could only be in there for like a lap around the store because I started crying

Like dawg think of it these motherfuckers are in a glass box until they go to another cage

Alone

Idk man it makes me so sad

Like seeing the parakeet cage at the store where there’s like 30 of them in a box

Like I’m crying rn thinking about it

So yeah I basically can’t go into pet stores which is annoying for my gf lol

But like I helped this homeless guy recently

I was pulling up and he said what’s up and I didn’t even look but then I glanced down and he had a dog with him with a service vest on

So I asked if that was his service dog and kept driving

But I started freaking out about the dog cause like, fuck it’s a homeless animal

But dude(holy fuck I’m losing my mind) this dog is a trained professional that’s support to be a tool. And now this is its life

It makes me so so so fucking sad

So idk I went back and bought food and water and shit and made sure they were okay

Like dawg this fucking dog saved you today fr

I hooked him up with some resources and left

Dude I’m fr crying so hard right now thinkin of this shit

But see this is what I mean

Like is it bad that this happens

It’s not really an inconvenience and it doesn’t happen at work

Idk it just makes me feel emotionally unstable

At least I mainly just do it in private or with my gf

Idk can’t really tell fr

Alright bye

[toehwa6]

Dawg people on this app are so fucking cringe def making the right decision by not interacting with anyone

Jeez no one gives a fuck about you enough to care about anything you’re bitching about

Probably because it’s just a bunch of kids here fr

I can’t remember what I dealt with as a teen so I probably can’t relate

Whatever I only relate to kids when I’m getting PAID for it lmao

Jk I’m down to help a lil homie whenever

Cause I’m a super duper super good guy

I hate being alive

[toehwa6]

Wish the homie was still around so I could show him my music

One of the only people I believe genuinely liked my music and push me to do shit

Miss you guy. Sucks what happened fr

Funny I say a saying you where in LOVE with

That dumbass ghandi quote or whatever

Be the person you want to be

So odd. But that sticks with me

I hate that I’m one of these people that is trying to make my dead friend proud

Idk idc

Why the fuck else am I living

Dude I miss my friend I can’t believe you ain’t here fr

Fuck. I’m not gonna move through this rn

Just thinking about you

I hope you know I’m thinking about you rn

Damn just made my night really sad

What’s sad is I spent mental health week jerking off anf playing video games

Idc my fucking back hurts

I miss my friend

I don’t miss anyone else

[toehwa6]

I’m reminded of a story my lil bros dad used to tell about wrastlin

He used to be super into it, and as a kid I was too dumb to understand any argument about this shit being fake or an entertainment thing

But he used to say

You know, I knew this shit was fake when I saw Batista and the undertaker walking down the street together. They were supposed to fucking HATE each other. Now I don’t fuck with it

lol whatever pussy

(I weally weally don’t like this guy)

lol actually here’s just random shit off the top of my head

Wanted to be a dj. Never tried it was. Took Dj Hero seriously lmao

Got booted from the navy after like 3 months but acting like you kept the discipline shit

Like bro you’re a fat alcoholic living in a trailor yeah super proud

So fucking annoying

Growing up and finding out he’s a loser was wild

Kinda like with my own dad

Now this guy is off getting married at like 15 with ANOTHER kid

I think sometimes

What are you gonna tell that kid

That you booted your daughter?

That your other kid is dead?

Gonna be a crazy conversation. Maybe it’ll never happen. Who knows

I honestly don’t give a fuck. I don’t really be laughing at peoples L’s anymore. Just a fucking waste of time

Who gives a fuck what this guys up to

Idc

Anyway yeah just thought about that

Also he was like a huge juggalo

I don’t have a problem with that. But bro it was like his whole personality

And he took like horror shit super seriously too it was so cringe

He used to go all out for Halloween shit

Like bro your pretentious and pathetic

Look at you okay huh look at you

What a dick

Yo you want to know some real shit lol

This one time, him and my mom staged a fake murder to fuck with me and my younger brother. I was probably like 10 and he was like 6

Me my mom and my brother all get home and the house is like destroyed

And this motherfucker is laying on the floor covered in ketchup

I’m not even fucking with you

As a child, I did not notice this was ketchup lol

Also, my mom literally starts screaming and freaking out and goes ahhh quick to the bathroom we have to hide omg wtf right

So we’re “hiding” in the bathroom

And this motherfucker who was playing dead

Literally comes banging on the door and screaming

Then he opened it and literally was like a fucking serial killer from a movie

We were literally freaking out terrified so the joke was cut soon after

I don’t really care about this. Kinda just a shitty story that happened to me when I was a kid

I talked to my friend who went through shit like this too, and he thinks it made us resilient

He went through drug addiction and abuse and I had a pappy addicted to heroin and domestic violence

Just too people who didn’t get along living together

I’m getting some more memories now

Maybe I’ll right about them later

Here’s one

I remember him beating up my mom fighting outside

And I was standing there going ha ha I got the phone

For some reason someone probably wanted the phone

And I was like haha I’m beating you

I see that innocent ignorance in the kids I’m around now

They’re not around any violence or anything

But when confrontation happens

I can see how restricted they are cognitively

Such a weird feeling

Idk, I don’t really care about this shit

More just a huh would ya look at that

Who gives a shit fr

Alright bye

[toehwa6]

Stopped taking flexeril to sleep at night and now I got #nightmares real bad

One of the you know what’s got infected

I’m literally an R word and put one in the crevice of my fucking elbow

Yeah def learned a lesson with this one

Been getting hella panic attacks over it

Luckily a Therapist I had taught me to distinguish between anxiety attacks and panic attacks

My arm fucking hurts

Shit looks like a gun shot wound

I’m def not having fun

Keep thinking of the guy from requiem for a dream that got his arm amputated

Huh?? What??

Shuddup mane

[toehwa6]

Something I know is extremely dumb but at the time I felt it was necessary

[toehwa6]

Well had to even it out so I did more and then the whole cig was still there and I couldn’t stop thinking about it so I did more again holy fuck

Jeez

[toehwa6]

So just hurt myself pretty bad this kinda sucks

Last time I did it there was 8 and this time I was like well I wanna do more so I’ll do ten

Then I did 12

And I had some cig leftover

So I just went fuckin crazy

Super sucks fr

Well I guess anyway

Super disappointed I was freaking out and fucked my pattern up

Idk if that’s weird to say

Super sucks idc

I was talking to my therapist about this because he couldn’t really understand why I did this shit

I was like

Well at first it was to make the bad feelings stop

Or because I was sad or something

But the last two times have just been because it feels good

I explained it in two parts

The first is the build up

The anticipation and anxiety you get because you know what’s coming

And the build up until that moment

Then there’s the pain and that feels cool

I compared this to getting a tattoo and the anticipation/excitement that comes with it

But the second part is the pain after

I explained it to working out or lol getting a tattoo

The next few days of my arm just fucking hurting feels amazing

Idk super weird

I talked to my friend about it and she agreed so it didn’t make me feel too bad

She used to cut as a kid, then stopped. But she got a tattoo and was like yo that feels exactly the same so I shouldn’t get tattoos

Now she’s getting tattoos to cover up her scars

And I be talkin to her fr and she says it feels amazing

I get it

Idk what it is about it fr

I told my therapist it’s the same exact feeling of when I’m hungry

It’s so weird

Idk

Idk why I’m doing it fr

Wish I didn’t

But I can feel in my head that I don’t wish I didn’t. I want to do this forever

Shits addicting I guess

Yo what actually sucks is I’m the only motherfucker who’s old doing this shit but started when I’m old

Hard to relate a little bit

And omg bro these SH subs are fucking crazy I don’t relate to anything in there

The memes about it made me sick

Also all this shit is about cutting

I explained to my therapist and my friend why

In my aspie mind I go, okay. So cutting is really dangerous, and if you fuck it up you could die

In my mind I was like

Yo I don’t think this is a trial and error situation lmao

So I just burn myself with cigs

People say that’s worse because of infection, but I’ve been doin this shit for a minute and if you know how to keep it clean and not pop the blisters you’re good

Bro this shit is crazy under the blisters when they pop

I went to a cubing comp recently and was really worried about bein around kids

But it went super well. Didn’t even think about my arm when I was there

It was honestly so nice

I have to go to PT in like a hour so gotta fuckin deal with that

I had some that were open wounds so I had to bandage them, and my PT lady was like oh fuck you good?

So I just said yeah bad test results and kept it movin

Bro I covered those up with a big non stick bandage

Ain’t no covering this shit up man

Fuck

Why the fuck do I do this shit

Dawg my shit looks absolutely fucked right now

Fuck

I just looked and it’s super bad

Fuck fuck fuck

Oh jeez we’ll just gotta deal with it

Fuck

Fuck fuck fuck

Yo where the old people at help a brother out

Who’s even reading this shit

Oh yeah, ME

Sometimes lol

Alright I’m gonna go try and cover this ttyl

[toehwa6]

So I’m currently emotionally overwhelmed by a good deed I did

I pulled up to a red light and this homeless guy was there and I was like naw not today but then I looked down and saw he had a dog but then I saw a service animal vest and I was like wtf that your service dog and he was like yeah

So I threw him a 5 and was like peace

But as I’m driving away I’m thinking about locking eyes with that dog and just thinking

Man. That dog is a professional. And now it’s homeless

I wasn’t mad at the owner or anything. Just really upset that one of those dogs ended up in that situation

I’m starting to cry again just thinking about it

Before this I went back up and was like profession mode myself and I was like yo what do you need

I asked if he was hungry and what he needed and shit and then I was like

And WHAT DOES THAT DOGE EAT ??

But I was like naw fr do you have dog food and everything you need

I asked if he knew what the giant eagle hot food was and he was like idk do they have chicken fingers

So I laughed and was yeah you you fuck with max n cheese?

He’s like yeah so I said I was gonna get him some of that too

I told him I was getting him so fuckin hoagie or something so he could eat later

The dog was fantastic btw

A little unprofessional if you ask me lol

But anyway I go and get the shit and pull back up

And the dogs like omg wtf

So I’m like how about you come over here and get this and he was like okay and left the dog but I was like FUCK THAT bring the doge

So this motherfucker runs across the run and into the parking and is just losing its mind all over it

It was fantastic

Then I opened my car door and was like this is what I got and his fuckin dog hopped in the car and was being really funny

Dawg I’m literally losing my mind writing this rn I’m so upset I hate hate hate to see shit like this

I gave him our advocate info and was like call this when you get the phone

So I said alright bye LET ME PET THE DOG ONE MORE TIME

Then I fist bumped him and was sorry I couldn’t do more fr

And dawg now it’s hot as fuck outside and I can’t stop thinking about it

I’m just telling myself I did the most that I can without straight just bringing the dude with me

Idk hopefully just helped him a little

Idk

Fuck ugh

[toehwa6]

Also one more thing this fucking pussy cunt at PT was talking to me about cubing in the most dickish way possible

He literally was acting like he was being forced to talk to me

Then when I answered his questions he literally goes meh and fucks off

ANYWAY

I did an OH solve before so they wanted a 2H one

I said after I’m done with my shit so after I was done it was me those two and that cunt

The PT bitches were like yo stay and watch this it’ll be cool and he goes nah and just walks off

Mind you I do not care about this guy watching me cube

BUT

I go

Where the fucks he goin? I don’t do this shit for free

And they fucking lost it

Like hell yeah bitch love when jokes work out

lol fucking idiot I’m holdin it down for the PT bitches

Gonna use their strength to overcome nerves this weekend

Mm bye

[toehwa6]

Just got recommended porn on here wtf

Well don’t mind if I do he he he..

Dawg horny people are so fuckin weird sometimes tho

I think it’s the people that are openly horny that are weird lol

I love having actual convos on the doujin sub it’s so funny

Anyway, I’m gonna go jerk off

Cya

[toehwa6]

Yo just had the best time at PT

Told them I was going to Ohio for a Rubik’s cube comp

And they lost they’re fucking minds

It was the craziest thing ever

My brain didn’t know what to do it was like fuck are they making fun of me do they feel bad for me are they just doing this to be nice blah blah blah

But I was like.

No bitch. I’m gonna fucking do this shit

So I played it up and had a good time

They literally stopped everyone doing theyre work to make them watch me solve

Then, I did a fucking OH solve

And they exploded

It was so crazy

The PT bitch who’s fuckin with me is so fuckin nice it’s crazy

So fucking genuine. It feels great to have people like this around you

Anyway; yeah I made it cool and fun and happy blah blah blah

But naw fr, I enjoyed it

It was so nice to be in that situation and not be AS scared lol

Just want to be me

It’s going pretty well I guess

Comp goals plz don’t hate me

3x3 - 12sec avg, good single

OH - sub20 avg(honestly more like fucking single at this point, so that’s the goal)

2x2 - idc get a good solve

Clock - get a full avg lol idc how bad it is

That’s it

My wrist hurts from doing all this shit

Shits goin so good rn

Gonna go SH real quick lmao jk I literally can’t stop thinking about it tho

Psych doctor was cool today too. He’s such a douche tho lol

I was like dawg I been smokin heavy and I’m depressed

He’s like, maybe you depressed cause you smokin heavy

And I go

NO DOC NOOO DONT SAY ITS THE WEED

STOP BEING SO RATIONAL

WHY DONT YOU STOP BEING MY DOCTOR AND BE MY HOMIE FOR A SEC

Bro it was so cool. I feel like he’s dope once he relaxes

It’s so funny tho like I said he’s a huge dick lol

I fuck with him super heavy tho. Probably one of the most influential people in my life

What a dick hehehe