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[ultimatefartwizard]

You heard them, go vote NOW

-wiz

[ultimatefartwizard]

Agonies of a Late Homestuck Reader Pt.3

Wiz is here for the hell that is this work, and now we start off with Act 2, we begin with a mysterious vagabond wandering a desert. He like... finds this underground bunker type thing with a lid that has the same symbol as the cruxtruder? Quite interesting!

Jumping back to John, since he seems to now be in like floating purgatory type situation yet alive and well.... as well as a just now 13 year old boy can be after just nearly dying from a meteor hurdling towards him and his father's house.

Am I insane and used RPGmaker XP too much? Or does the wind sound in it sound like one of the wind effects RPGmaker XP use (specifically using it as an example as I've never used other rpgmaker programs)

I downloaded Ruffle (a in-browser flash player replacement) to circumnavigate the "flash player no longer supported" issue since I wanted a true genuine experience as it was intended, and thankfully it works! For those wanting Ruffle, you can find it -HERE-

I played the segment with John looking around his house, and was amused by this sort of omnipotent narrator type character (soon revealed to be the vagabond, having gone down into the bunker and is using a computer to communicate) that would order commands at him and just call him "BOY."

Various Vagabond antics; makes me think of how Kratos calls his son "boy" continually in Ragnarok.

As I further mucked about, John's father seems to be missing and some sort of oil substance is everywhere. I originally thought his father got whole ass slaughtered and had him bleed out like a pig, thankfully not... maybe? I haven't read far enough yet.

I immediately thought of John Kramer talking through Billy the puppet when I read this clicking on the cabinet. And considering the species of "Cherub" in Homestuck is based on the puppet, I wouldn't put it past Hussie to make a (slightly butchered) reference.

John talks to Dave, and.... well I won't show the image of the exact things he says when he starts rapping cuz 1. I can't put a clickable censor on images and 2. not comfortable posting that but OH MY GOD. HUSSIE... HUSSIE! NO STOP HUSSIE DONT WRITE THAT YOU ARE WHITE OH MY GODDD.... DON'T MAKE THAT CHILD SAY SUCH THINGS AND MAKE MORE WEIRD AND BORDERLINE RACIST COMMENTS.... Why are you obsessed. Why are you especially obsessed with black presidents and, in conjunction, Obama??? Do you have some sort of weird crush on this man because you think about him too much. (joking around with myself to save my sanity, im dying here, also note i feel these negative ramblings are important especially when looking at this piece of media in a critical light)

Please I pray the comments like this calm down... though knowing the later stuff ik Hussie doesn't stop being weird or finds new ways to be gross and weird. I also made the mistake of reading the "sweet bro and hella jeff" comic Hussie linked on Dave's segment and my god this explains the later incident with..... a certain Homestuck 2 character. DO NOT READ THAT FOR YOUR SANITY BTW.

Back onto the story itself, watching Dave manage his sylladex and how his captchalogues/uncaptchalogues stuff makes me realize how stupidly complex his is, and it's the most complex thus far. I still don't understand it but that's for another time for rambles. Also rather curious out of the three revealed human children so far he's the only one who's not apprehensive to his family member's collection of themed stuff; in this case, it's his brother's puppet collection. I swear to god there's got to be some sort of underlying reason for these, there's no way that these are all presented to the reader and somehow don't have any strong significance or meaning.

It cuts over to Rose again, who's trying to get out to the generator in the rain so she can boot up her computer to pair up with John again and escape certain doom due to a meteor shower hitting the forest she lives in and is engulfed in flames. She seems to have a lot of contempt for her mother, not sure if it's the same back towards her but they are noted to have some sort of one-uping competitions. Both John and Rose seem to compete with their parents while Dave nods and seeminly respects his brother's stuff, which is interesting and definitely will try to investigate this phenomenon as I read.

I leave off on page 374, certainly to return later for more reading! -Wiz

[ultimatefartwizard]

I LOVE THE BUMBLEBEE BEING JUST A STUMP WITH A FACE EVERYONE COME LOOK!!!

LOOK AT CUPIDS FUNNY!!!

-wiz

Happy Easter (even tho it was yesterday) I’m back at it again with another banger 🥶🥶

[ultimatefartwizard]

He's the prettiest roach princess.

(Yes, you get no context) -Wiz

[ultimatefartwizard]

Agonies of a Late Homestuck Reader Pt.2

Ahaha, back at the horrors! It's time to continue where I left off on this journey through the 7 or whatever many circles of hell there are.

Most of these will likely be typed as I read them unlike the earlier parts, both to keep my memory fresh as it is trash 24 hours later and to have live reaction to things.

I return to the page I last left off, where John was needing the server/creator? version of SBurb but TentacleTherapist (revealed Rose Lalonde after a few pages) was fucking shit up with breaking the house and putting giant machines everywhere, John pulled some blue jollyrancher looking cruxite dowel out of the machine and started some timer

APPARENTLY ITS BECAUSE A METEOR IS COMING AT THE EARTH SO FAST??? WHAT IN THE SWEET HELL IS GOING ON? Damn I knew theres like aliens and shit but we're IMMEDIATELY STARTING WITH ARMAGEDDON, LOVELY!

And with one parent who did work on microbiology, I still had to look up "flagellum" to figure out what the fuck that meant.

Miss Rose mucks around during her precious time on her violin, don't blame her though i'd do the same if I knew how to play an instrument and the world was ending!

Average 13 year old child behavior (literally, I'd also do the same if I was him)

Now hold your magical horned horses, how the hell did Hussie get such a immaculate image of me back in 2009?! I was barely 700 years old by then!

And after this I came upon the ending of the first act, John trying to bite a blue totem apple (potentially a biblical reference? like how Eve bites the apple of Eden and gets them kicked out or whatever?) but either fails to do so because the meteor DEFINITELY hit or I guess the apple saves the players? No clue I just finished the first act! Till next time everyone! I'll be reading and reviewing Act 2 of Homestuck! How.... how many acts are there, by the way?

[ultimatefartwizard]

Finally making an introductory post; I'm Wizard! I also go by Wiz.

I'm the primary admin of this blog! I do most of the organizing and planning for posts, though typically Cupid is the one who creates the original ideas or idea that we bounce off one another but it's all relatively spontaneous! Here's some basic info on me:

>> 21 Years old >> He/They >> Artist and Writer >> Beginning Coder and Game Developer

Some of my major interests are: Cookie Run, Transformers, My Little Pony (FIM primarily), LPS, biology (primarily zoology), mythology and folktales, Pokemon, RPGmaker games, FNaF, those old ass glitter graphics and similar graphics of the 2000s/2010s, and quite a bit more but I'm yapping a ton so that's enough for now!

Hoping y'all will enjoy what we post together and what nonsense we will create together and vomit out, we have a ton in mind but slowly dribble it out into here.

Also, I look like this IRL vvv

[ultimatefartwizard]

Agonies of a Late Homestuck Reader Pt.1

(Note: Alot of these entries coming up will be posted later than the initial reading and writing, but the writing and replies to any comments are live) -If anyone knows Hussie's current pronouns lmk I hear they are clowngender I think? Just wanting to be sure so I'm not using the wrong set) Okay so first part, only got to where John is starting sBurb before I put the thing down for other activities Starting from the top!

Very beginning, was a little perplexed yet amused with the strange inclusion of a lot of computer programming and data structure lingo, and that the kids somehow have personal hammer-space like data slots for their personal belongings in the real world. I'm just barely learning coding languages myself so it's both as lost on me as John and I also simultaneously understand what nonsense they are blabbing about with the sylladex.

There's quite a good amount of unexpected flowery language and vocabulary, I'm assuming its part of Hussie's strange weird perplexities to vomit out a ton of vocabulary words a mere 10 year old won't know (at least at first), shit I didn't even know half the words and I'm a grown ass man, so I guess this will ALSO be a learning experience for fancy word vomit too lmao

AND HUSSIE DROPPED THIS BOMB?

excuse me how is it legal for this utter freak-clown of a person to be this good at writing some insane poetry drop like this? No wonder why people around me during my middle school years were frothing over this work this fool is shockingly insane with the effort and lack there-of in this webcomic, if its really even labeled as such? This whole thing even has its own music score and animations and it's baffling especially for 2009, my experiences with back then was a huge lack of that unless it was like youtube comic readings with royalty free music. Then again I was a weird kid and only stuck to a very small amount of media back then so my worldview is rather small, beyond the little info I got about Homestuck from fanworks during its golden era.

Of course, a work written by the Huss themself is not without its flaws already, and I already knew about the issues surrounding them so I wasn't necessarily surprised to find the weird two race related comments (what the hell man?) early on and casual throw of the r slur (which, with it being 2009, the R slur hadn't net fully been recognized as a slur so had to remind myself when seeing it, not an excuse at all for Hussie adding it but not surprised).

Genuinely what the hell does anything in the second image mean???? Maybe i'm not uber galaxy brained enough to understand the nonsense lipflapping Hussie is going on about with the McConaughey Wall, I don't even know who the FUCK this guy is.

Still holding out since this is really early on and not even SCRATCHING the surface of this insane piece of media that's got more words than the damn Bible, though with high doubts due to things I've heard and the mere existence of... eugh... Homestuck 2. But I'll still try to read Homestuck in its entirety and hoping at least Hussie will pipe down and not make as many weird ass things like this as the comic progresses.

Anyways I got to where Johnny is blabbing to TT and they are destroying the bathroom, seems this game SBurb affects reality? Interesting yet strange.

Till next time folks, Wizard will blab again about stupid media he missed out on during their golden years!

[ultimatefartwizard]

Cookie Run HC: Kingdom

Okay okay finally getting around to asking more questions for the head canon stuff, since Kingdom won it gets it's characters picked first.

[ultimatefartwizard]

Somewhat older by a few months, but Strawberry Crepe if they looked like a creepy analog horror looking ass saint/virgin mary/cultist because doesn't EVERYONE need a creepy horror robot in their life?

-wiz

Oh and bonus sketch of Crepe as an lps toy by Cupid

[ultimatefartwizard]

Cupid and I (Wiz) as honorary Earthspark fans, LOVE THIS

Nothing screams "starscream" like creating war over a PTA meeting for his daughter!

it's not often i get to make screamer a dad

[ultimatefartwizard]

Finally uploading some damn art again, this time transformers related (who would have guessed) Fan favorite, the ol' devious embodiment of the Hay's Code extraordinaire, Starscream!

(Design is a mix of G1 and some personal touches, ignore the roughness of the work my arm was hurting while I was making it) -Wiz

[ultimatefartwizard]

Wiz here GLARING at cupid because now i have 3 hours left till its determined if i get snapped in 2 or not HELP ME FOOLS!!! HELP ME!!! SAVE ME FROM DOOM YOU KNOW YOU LOVE ME HELP HELEP-

Quick question

[ultimatefartwizard]

Quick question

[ultimatefartwizard]

Hiiii Wiz here

Do you want to see me suffering? Because my ass at my grown age is about to (finally) read Homestuck after it somehow evaded me for years

[ultimatefartwizard]

RAH NIGHTSHADE JUMPSCARE

-Wiz

AHHHHHHHHH

[ultimatefartwizard]

dr wasabi will burn your house down with combustible lemons

Yes and unfortunately mustard has to suffer the consequences

Rip mustard you would have loved mitski - Cupid 🕊️

[ultimatefartwizard]

dr wasabi = a silly octopus grandma that still is pretending to be a normal cookie tehehehehe (she cursed herself :D)

Yes and no, she doesn't really try to pretend being human since she could care less about people's perception on her humanity.

She was never a human to begin with, though nobody really knows her exact original sepcies; and due to her being nonhuman she's pretty old, as old as the ancients are currently and absolutely no signs of slowing down

She became an octopus woman being thing due to self experimentation in her younger years, she was shunned heavily for her unethical and immoral experiments to where she resorted to using herself as a test subject.

The experimentation was intentional but the result (her becoming octopus humanoid thing) was unpredicted/not calculated

Technically not even cursed cuz she uses her newfound weirdness to the full extent and is even MORE of a nuisance due to it

-Wiz