vmacademy-blog

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We are only ever at war with ourselves

The Movie US from Jordan Peele is sending shivers up our spines and then making us scratch our heads as we try to work out what the hell is going on!!

As Jorden says in his interviews, he does not want to answer all the questions and deliberately leaves his movies open to interpretation. Depending on your background and life experiences you will see the movie from a different angle and that is correct as that is how we all see the world, differently.

In the movie we have the “normal” people who live above and the shadow people who live bellow, these shadows are tethered to their normal counterparts and have the same experiences but in reverse, so the nice thigs that happen above are not so nice below.

Eventually the shadow people below become so sick of this pain that they must break free of their tethered counterparts.

And this is a fantastic analogy for what we all do here in the real world today. When we can not deal with certain emotions or situations, we often stuff down these feelings or deny that certain things are happening, but they must go somewhere, they don’t just disappear.

So where do they go? Our shadow selves, they follow us everywhere and soak up all our denial and avoidance. But eventually they can take no more and they break open and it all comes flooding out.

You see we cannot live in denial, we cannot live in avoidance, we need the negative as much as the positive in order to find balance. But when we only want a happy life with no problems this is a very unrealistic expectation. If unresolved all those negative things don’t just disappear, they keep building up until they spill over.

Both are extreme, neither are in balance and one threatens the others existence. In order to live the good life, we dump all our pain onto our shadow self, but the shadow is tethered to us, it follows us everywhere and we can never escape it. But we try to shun the darkness and ignore it, we run from it and we deny it.

In life we are only ever at war with ourselves but it’s not about winning the war it is about finding balance between the positive and the negative.

We wear Masks to avoid this reality and deny the truth, but the truth can never be denied it only waits for its moment in the light. Question is, do you want to wait for it to spill over and come find you or would you rather take control and bring it into balance.

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Self-medication crisis

Depression is associated with feelings of sadness, loss and anger and this affects everyday life for many people around the world. Not everyone is willing to seek medical advice or counselling and instead opt for self-medication.

It is difficult to cope with extreme situations on our own and self-medication is a rocky road to ruin as the more you try to stuff down these emotions the stronger they become.

Self-medication is a quick fix that can never resolve the bigger problem, that’s why we keep going back over and over to stuff down these feelings. When we do not know how to resolve internal emotional issues, we look externally at various substances to self-medicate.

The self-medication then in turn becomes its own illness and all the problems have become compounded.

Now its time to take a good look at yourself because we often are very good at lying to ourselves around this issue, just because you are not obese that doesn’t mean you do not binge eat, just because you never miss a day’s work does not mean you are not drinking too much.

Here are the top 5 self-medications, which ones do you recognise?

·         Comfort eating to supress negative emotions.

·         Alcohol to alleviate anxiety

·         Psychostimulant’s such as Cocaine, amphetamines to stimulate euphoria.

·         Caffeine to perk you up.

·         Marijuana to relax

·         Tobacco to relax

 When the self-medication becomes too much too hide and plain for all to see, society looks and labels them addicts. Collectively we separate them from us in our minds and in our actions, deciding that we are better. But addiction is never about the drug; the drug of choice is only there to avoid the unpleasant feelings that we all have.

All of these addictions are to Mask the pain because we do not know how to deal with it, we were never shown another way. But there is another way, not through medication but by reconnecting with yourself and learning how to cope emotionally removing the stress and fear that lead to addiction.

This is what is needed in schools, colleges and universities to equip each generation with the emotional tools required to survive. Education, certificates and career advancement are no use when you can’t cope with the stress and hit the bottle.

Current stats suggest that in America 10% are drug or alcohol addicted, that’s 23.5 million Americans. 70% are overweight or obese. Together that means three quarters of America are in some kind of self-medication crisis.

Ignorance is the biggest killer in any situation, pretending this crisis is not spreading across the world will be come back to hit us hard as the planet becomes sick and our systems can no longer cope.

We do not need medication we need a new way of thinking. Educate people on their inner well being so they no longer need to Mask their pain.

[vmacademy-blog]

Reports suggest that over 75% of Americans are self medicating. From opioids, coffee, tobacco, alcohol to sugar. Anything to Mask the pain. But all we are doing is delaying the inevitable. You cannot keep avoiding it. As a society we have to rethink our emotional well-being and how we tackle stress. Without emotional education we end up in an addiction crisis. We must learn to drop these Masks and remove the pain without medication. Join VM Academy to discover the Masks Program. New solutions to old problems without the medication. #selfmedication #personaldevelompentcoach #personalgrowth #meditatedontmedicate #edinburghmentalhealth #londonmentalhealth #manchestermentalhealth #manchesterblogger #londonblogger #edunburghbloggers #leadbyexample #inspire #tuesdaythoughts https://www.instagram.com/p/Bvv7cT5HcVu/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1ext8uzhjgfex

[vmacademy-blog]

April Fools is once a year but we fool ourselves ever day. We ignore our true selves and hide behind Masks. No one is normal but we all try and pretend that we are and that's the crazy part. We all need help in our relationships and businesses to drop our Masks and live authentic. Follow VM Academy Masks Program and join us on our workshops to learn who you really are behind the Mask. #mentalhealthedinburgh #mentalhealthmanchester #mentalhealthlondon #mentalhealthquotes #inspiration #inspire #mondaymotivation #change #aprilfools #transformation #mentalhealthawareness #womaninbusiness #entrepreneurlife #entrepreneur #liveauthentically #lifecoach #businesscoach https://www.instagram.com/p/Bvt25v8HyR_/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=130v990alwzy5

[vmacademy-blog]

You know that feeling when you've just had enough and your not taking it anymore. Well, think of it another way. Life is a game and the only person your playing against is yourself. We all hide behind Masks as we pretend to be something we are not and eventually this builds until it boils over. So instead of waiting for the explosion, take control and learn to understand and drop your Masks. The only person you are fighting against is yourself. Join VM Academy Masks Program to discover who you really are under the Mask. Follow us, like us and forward us if your ready for change. #mentalhealthawareness #mensmentalhealth #womansmentalhealth #personalgrowth #personaldevelompentcoach #personaldevelopment #leadership #leadbyexample #manchester #manchestermentalhealth #manchesterblogger #edinburghmentalhealth #edinburghbloggers #mentalhealthlondon #londonblogger #entrepreneurlife #entrepreneur #lifecoach #saturday #change #transformation # https://www.instagram.com/p/BvoNa3Sn33V/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=d48dpoo5k27q

[vmacademy-blog]

You are the director of your life.

You are the director of your life.

You set the stage.

You bring in the characters.

You create the stress.

You play out the drama.

You are your own critic.

You are the director of your life.

So, if you created it, you can change it.

[vmacademy-blog]

Inspired or Forced?

When you look at today are you excited to get started or are you dreading the day? Are you full of drive and focus or is it just another day?

Because if we tell ourselves we are business leaders, entrepreneurs, coaches and leaders but we are only wearing these titles as Masks then we are doing ourselves and the people round us a disservice. 

That does not mean you must be full of zest every day, but it does mean we have to stop pretending we are, when we are not.

Because if it is not inspired then it is forced, and if it is forced then it is not correct. So, take a step back today and look at what you are doing, which category does it fall into, inspired or forced?

In order to lead by example, we must drop our fake Masks to truly understand ourselves and why we waste time on forced activities. What are we doing, why are we doing it? If we are not inspired, then no one around us will be either.

Inspired work flows and the people involved grow. Forced work exposes the cracks in the system to be transformed, and that can only happen when we take responsibility for the situation and understand what we have done to create it in the first place.

Learn to understand and drop your Masks with VM Academy and how it can transform your business.

#coaching #inspiration #business #womaninbusiness #entrepreneur #lifecoach #businesscoach #leadership #leadbyexample

[vmacademy-blog]

The weekend has landed, learn to drop your Masks and be your true self.

learn more at www.vmacademy.co.uk

[vmacademy-blog]

When others pull you down

When someone is unhappy, scared or stagnating they will justify their behaviour and do everything they can to pull others down to their level. Otherwise they would have to admit that they are wrong.

So they hide behind Masks of Micromanaging, Judging and Time Wasting and will do whatever it takes to keep you stuck at their level.

You know these people, the Energy Vampire who sucks the life out of your day and your ideas, the Pessimist who warns you not to take risks and the Know It All who tells you all about how they would do it with no real interest in your view or idea.

These are just some of the Masks people hide behind to not shine, to make excuses to not try or take risks but there is a flip side to this, what Mask are YOU wearing?

Because if you are listening to this nonsense then you are just as fearful as they are, but you wear a different Mask and play the Fool, or the Victim or the People Pleaser, they are all fake Masks and they need to be recognised and removed.

We cannot shine from behind a Mask.

[vmacademy-blog]

Positive thinking is bad for your health

The philosophy of positive thinking means being untruthful; it means being dishonest. It means seeing a certain thing and yet denying what you have seen; it means deceiving yourself and others. And it appeals particularly to mediocre minds.

The negative is needed as much as the positive, they balance each other out.

To expose oneself means to expose all the rubbish that you carry in your mind, the garbage that has been piling up for many, many years. To expose all one’s weaknesses, limitations, faults. To expose oneself ultimately means to expose one’s vulnerability.

 From your very childhood you have been taught to wear masks, beautiful masks. There is no need to have a beautiful face, just a beautiful mask will do: and the mask is cheap. 

One of the fundamental laws of life is this: whatever you go on hiding goes on growing and whatever you expose, if it is wrong, it completely disappears and if it is right it will be completely nourished as it feeds on truth

People are feeding on the unreality and starving their reality. If you expose yourself then the unreal will die because it cannot remain in the open it can only remain in secrecy and when revealed it gives you complete liberation.

[vmacademy-blog]

CBD oil is becoming a popular addition to foods and drinks to help deal with daily stress and anxiety (as well as people taking it for inflammation and other medical reasons.) but if we start to self medicate for stress all we are doing is masking the pain and creating a crutch for ourselves. 

The only way to deal with anxiety and stress is to expose and remove the root cause. Drop your Masks and remove the pain forever, self medicating only prolongs the inevitable. 

We all wear Masks, you are not alone, but as long as we keep hiding we think we are alone.

Learn more at www.vmacademy.co.uk transforming mindsets across the UK

[vmacademy-blog]

Thought for the weekend, It’s exhausting trying to be someone else, drop your Masks and learn to be yourself, after all, it’s the best version of you, so embrace it completely and love yourself.

Masks Program www.vmacademy.co.uk

[vmacademy-blog]

When we hide behind Masks it is very easy to judge others or pretend to be better than we really are. We can stand back and deliver truth bombs to others but we rarely appreciate the truth in return. How do we become a friend to the truth rather than see it as a painful enemy? Drop your Masks and embrace reality. Masks Program www.vmacademy.co.uk 

[vmacademy-blog]

Baroness Brady has resigned as Chairwoman of Arcadia. Many say she must have known about the harassment NDA's. But how often have you made a decision in conflict with your principles and hidden behind a Mask of hear no evil - see no evil - speak no evil. #karrenbrady #personaldevelopment https://www.instagram.com/p/BuY0Z1DAYzH/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=ilood7kf3jsf

[vmacademy-blog]

People don’t want to hear the truth because they don't want their own fake reality challenged. Do you want to continue living a fake life in a fake Mask? Is it time to ask yourself “Who am I?”

[vmacademy-blog]

People don't want to hear the truth because they don't want their own fake reality challenged. Do you want to continue living a fake life protected by a fake Mask? Is it time to ask yourself "Who am I?" #liamneeson #personaldevelopment https://www.instagram.com/p/BuYxloDA0HB/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=177hhfj05es4w

[vmacademy-blog]

A Mask is a fake persona that we wear, when it is dropped, and the truth is revealed it can come as a shock to people because it challenges their own fake Masks. But as long as we attack honesty, no matter the topic, we encourage fear and secrecy. #liamneeson #liamneeson https://www.instagram.com/p/BuVzANIAMFm/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1shyf4nlnlx4u