whore4villains - Tumblr blog

[whore4villains]

Maleficent: I don’t have a resting bitch face. My bitch face is always on duty, ever vigilant. My bitch face will rest when its work is done.

[whore4villains]

Hades: What are you in the mood for?

Maleficent: World domination.

Hades: That's a bit ambitious.

Maleficent: You are my world.

Hades: Aww, that’s uncharacteristically sweet

Maleficent: …

Hades:

Maleficent:

Hades: OH

[whore4villains]

Maleficent : *on the phone* Just snap his kneecaps and he’ll talk, I’m at a parent teacher conference.

Maleficent : Anyways, you said Mal is enjoying finger painting! That's great.

[whore4villains]

Evil Queen : I made you all playlists!

Evil Queen : Maleficent , yours has only heavy metal, and is dark like your soul.

Evil Queen : Cruella, yours has sad songs and blues to pair with your crippling depression.

Evil Queen : And Jafar has the ABBA Gold album.

[whore4villains]

Maleficent : Don’t weep for the stupid. You’ll be crying all day.

[whore4villains]

Hades: Wake up Sleeping Beauty.

Maleficent: Say that again and it’ll be the last thing you say.

[whore4villains]

Maleficent : That was so hot, Hades.

Hades: I literally called the person who just flirted with you a degenterate dog and told them I hope they get dragged through the streets.

Maleficent : I'm so in love with you.

[whore4villains]

Jafar: This totally sucks, man.

Hades: This is horrible.

Jafar: Yeah, I know, I mean look at today’s news.

Hades: No, it’s not that, it’s Maleficent.

Hades: It’s just like, I can’t get her out of my head and every time I look at her I have this pains in my chest, and I just know it’s her fault, that bitch!

[whore4villains]

[whore4villains]

Jafar: I don’t know the first thing about clothes. Pretty much all I can do is look at something and tell you if it’s clothes or not. This chair? Not clothes.

[whore4villains]

Maleficent: Subs are so fun to play with. All you have to do is hint at what you might do, back them into a corner with a look, or grab their wrist in a certain way and they're a wide-eyed mess.

Jafar: What the fuck kind of Subway are you going to?

Cruella : Substitute teachers deal with so much shit.

Evil Queen : Guys.

[whore4villains]

Maleficent: You seem familiar... have I threatened you before?