#incorrect alex fierro

[i-am-alex-fierro]

Are you alive

No I've been dead for a couple years, but Hotel Valhalla is pretty nice I guess. I don't really post new stuff to this blog anymore unless something interesting happens tho and honestly my afterlife is pretty boring once the War Games started feeling repetitive

[nobodysavemysoulitsperfectlyfine]

Incorrect Percy Jackson Quotes as things my friends and I have said except I literally forgot the context.

Percy Jackson: "No. I will eat him. Swallow him whole. Shove him down my gullet. You underestimate how much I need him seasoned, battered, baked or fried."

Annabeth Chase: "No, the stupidest thing I've ever heard is anything Jk Rowling ever said."

Jason Grace: (screaming at the top of his lungs) "WHO EVEN IS JEMIMAH THE CONQUEROR??"

Leo Valdez: (breaking out into song whenever the room is quiet)

Piper Mclean: (In front of literal police) "It's because I stole it."

Frank Zhang: (Standing in front of a very wealthy house in the middle of the poorest county in the state) "What? I'm not rich."

Hazel Levesque: (Relentlessly being bullied for looking like a horse girl)

Nico Di Angelo: "I know it's midnight and we don't live here, but I really want to go out in the woods right now."

Will Sollace: "How could there possibly be THIS many things wrong with you?? What the hell?"

Chris Rodriguez: (Spamming calls and texts) "HOW COME EVERY TIME I TAKE COUGH MEDICINE I HAVE VIVID NIGHTMARES OF BEING IN FUCKING LEAGUE OF LEGENDS. I DON'T WANT THEM."

Octavian: "No, I'm really manipulative. It's gotten to a point where I don't even notice, but you guys should keep that in mind."

Reyna Avila Ramirez Allerano: (Aiming nerf guns stolen from a group of rotten kids) "JUSTICE!!"

Dakota: (Taking a drink of literally anything carbonated and visibly twitching uncomfortably) "Ew." (Drinking again) "Ew. Disgusting." (Drinking it again)

Mr. D: "Would you please STOP MAKING BABIES IF YOU DON'T WANT TO RAISE THEM."

Lester Papadopoulos: "How is it that every time a thunderstorm rolls around I have a psychotic break? Like, I have a feeling that's not just anxiety."

Meg Mcaffery: "I always thought Unicorns would be fatter."

Luke Castellan: "Guys, do you think I have bad morals?" (everyone saying yes in unison)

Alex Fierro: (Only ever using hoe as a pronoun when talking about someone to their face)

Magnus Chase: (Being forced to eat an orange peel covered in salt after saying he was bored while other people watched and recorded him gag)

Austin Lake:(Playing Sailor Song every moment he gets the chance)

Rachel Dare: "You know there's a Greek word for that? That describes exactly what you are?"

Georgina: "Right Now my Mom's waiting outside for and I quote "Biker Bitch". It's like a fairy tale."

Rhea: "I genuinely, and wholeheartedly believe that MOST of the world's problems would be solved if all men got a decent pegging. Every world leader, politician, everyone." (Continues to debate this perfectly for twenty minutes)

Ethan Nakumara: "Guys do your parents have nemisisees?"

Litreysis: "My entire face hates me."

Blitzen: "By Peach do you mean fruit or ass?"

Hearth: (Signing slurs in public to his boyfriend while smiling kindly)

Commodus: (Harassing the guy dressed up as Santa by repeatedly smacking his fake stomach and calling his ass a bowl full of jelly)

Thomas Jefferson Junior: "You're only a whore mentally."

Mallory Keen: (Prank calling some poor woman and screaming random scottish as loud as possible)

Marcus: "I'm gonna boil one of them alive and make the other watch."

Samirah Al Abbas: (frowning in response to seeing her friend's scores on the empathy test)

Arrow of Dodona: "Probably cause I am in the woods. They thought I got lost."

Ella The Harpy: (Rewrighting Heather's as a Biden x Trump musical with other world leaders as the Heathers)

I'm tired maybe I'll do more tomorrow or never

[ace-writer-lani]

Okay but imagine Hotel Valhalla having a reality tv show

Alex [facing a camera]: It's pretty chill here, I guess. We just wake up, kill, feast, do whatever, and repeat

[In the background Magnus trips and kills himself by falling on his own sword]

Alex: Obviously though, some of us have it easier than others

(Part two)

[nicodiangelo-we-stan]

Can you tell who my favs are from this post? Probably lol

Part 7 (as well as all the others)

[hidden-eyeballs]

Demigod Damian learns the truth

(At the LoA base)

Damian: Mother told me my true mother is the bat

Jason: the bat... is your mom? Are we talking about the same person?

Damian: we must be. Mother insists that it is the same one who raised you

Jason:.... B is a man... he'd be your father.

Damian: Impossible, my father is Apollo.

Jason: I think... Apollo is your mother.

Damian: *surprised Pikachu face*

[bluerazberrysoda]

magnus : look at this flower i found today! it was growing out my atrium, isn't it so pretty

alex : you'resopretty

magnus : hm?

alex : nothing. i fucking hate your guts and that flower is ugly

[incorrect-riordanverse-quotes]

Blitz: Alex, keep an eye on Magnus today. He’s going to say the wrong thing to someone and get punched. Alex: Sure, I’d love to see Magnus get punched. Blitz: Try again. Alex, sighing: I will stop Magnus from getting punched.

[incorrect-riordanverse]

Alex: there was the biggest fucking nerd sitting in your exact seat yesterday

Samirah: that was me with my glasses on

[logolepsy-babble]

[fierro-chase]

Hearthstone: *tapping fingers on table*

Blitzen: *taps fingers back furiously*

Alex: …What’s going on?

Magnus: Morse code. They’re talking.

Hearthstone: -.-- ..- .-. / - …. . / -.-. ..- - . … -

Blitzen: *slams hands on table* YOU TAKE THAT BACK!

[beeperoo]

Alex: you look like if Kurt Cobain and Chris Hemsworth had a lovechild

Magnus: And you.. look like if David Bowie and Barney The Fucking Dinosaur had a kid

Alex:

Magnus:

Alex: what the fuck does that mean

[i-am-alex-fierro]

how gay are you exactly?

Being gay isn't something measurable, no one is "more gay" than other people. Besides I don't really identify as gay or bi or pan or any of those labels, people are people and I feel fine leaving it at that

[riordanverse-craziness]

Alex: Well, my first rule would be that no one can veto my rules. Magnus: Well, that’s called “tyranny”, and it’s generally frowned upon.

[ace-writer-lani]

Alex: Stop...stop doing that.

Magnus: Doing what?

Alex: That. With your face.

Magnus: ...smiling?

Alex: Yes. It's distracting and it's so bright it makes me want to kill you.

Magnus: How romantic.

[nicodiangelo-we-stan]

I’ve made ten of these but I have these I’ve never posted due to being either ooc or space issues so…here! last post of these!

[nobodysavemysoulitsperfectlyfine]

Incorrect Percy Jackson Quotes as situations I've been getting me and my friends into again except they make even less sense than the last time. Because it's been a few months. And things happen.

These are only funny in a situational context so imagine if you will.

Travis Stoll: (Pulling off an elaborate prank to slowly steal every single fucking orange off of someone's plate before they notice, and procede to make a game of keep away)

I'm still upset about that.

Idk probably Luke: "Do you think he's aware of being the posterboy for eugenics?"

Will Solace: (Will not stop talking about Hannibal oh my god how does everything connect to Hannibal)

Rachel Elizabeth Dare: (Sending a billion pictures of the same random ass man nonstop)

Ethan Nakumara: "I can hear my eyeballs crunching"

Piper McLean: "Legally too unqualified to have a sugar daddy. Or mommy."

Annabeth Chase: "It's not stalking if they keep everything so public!"

Leo Valdez: (Explaining complex patterns of human thought and how they have a written plan to decipher people's behavior) "Just like Trigonometry."

Frank Zhang: (Holding a clown statue very delicately to his chest)

Percy Jackson: (With full confidence, hands on his hips) "Who the hell is eating pill dill chickle?"

Lester Papadopoulos: "Wait, can someone make that rhyme?.. I'm Dr. Seuss-us.. It's never Lupus.. AHA."

Hermes: "Oliver Twist never FUCKING scammed a person in his life. Yes, there was petty theft. So what?"

Hazel Levesque: (Eating fruit right down to the core. Can't tell me she doesn't do this from time to time.)

Fucking Thor I guess: (Being told about Werewolf Transgenderism Wednesday and thinking of Loki + Alex) "I would like to nominate that one werewolf mask as our hewere/shewere/theywere of honor."

Magnus Chase: "I begrudgingly hope you stay safe and get better."

Hearth: (blankly making siccsor motions with his hands everytime a specific person speaks)

Clovis: (Responding to texts from well over two months ago with just "what")

Sam Samirah Al Abbas: (In the most saddening fucking voice ever) "Oh.. Ham."

Mallory Keen: (Viciously stabbing at a tissue box in front of like five people for a good minute straight)

RARA: (keeping fucking spears at her bedside like a teddy bear)

Octavian: (Keeping a cheese knife under his pillow, weirdly enough, only for snacking on cheddar. Italian ass.)

Am I crazy or are some of the these the same asset time. It was with get for not proof reading at a.

Paolo: "And I guess that's just what BBC does to ya." (Talking about the British baking channel)

Loki: (Walking around someone else's house in the dead of night, flicking their tongue in complete silence like a fucking skinwalker)

Alex Fierro: (Accidentally scaring boys away by talking about a sharp metal chain belt they keep at all times to hit people with)

Jason Grace: (Wandering alone into the woods for a terrifying amount of time, wondering why people seem so scared when he finally thinks to return)

Connor Stoll: (Trying to teach a young child to swindle her little brother out of his Halloween candy and being both glad and disappointed that she won't)

Dakota: (Packing a stupid amount of dollar store, plastic, tacky ass neon cups to bring to a sleepover, only to insist on drinking water the entire time)

Blitz: (Assaulting people who bully his friends with horridly bright glitter)

Rachel Elizabeth Dare: (Painting her entire damn body absurd colors)