#ocd and ed

[dead-core]

i just need to have more rules for myself. more rules and limits. surely that will help me

[ed-recoverry]

This post exempts you from any and all “If you don’t ___ this post, ____ will happen.” You are hereby immune to it all. You are now protected! Be free!

[desultory-suggestions]

Just a reminder to check in with yourself. How is your body feeling? Do your muscles feel tense? Do you need to go to the bathroom? Are you hungry? When we get busy it’s easy to neglect our needs, so take a little time and give yourself what you need to make your day brighter.

[panicismydefaultstate]

Just in case anyone else needed to hear this today-

Your health is not your fault. You didn’t do anything to “deserve” this. And you are right, it isn’t fair. You are allowed to feel upset, hurt, angry and jealous that your health, body or mind disables you.

It’s not fair, and that sucks. You are allowed to scream about that as much as you need to.

[fella-lovin-fella]

[mxmorbidmidnight]

People struggle to grasp the concept that all my conditions affect eachother. OCD intrusive thoughts manifest as coprolalia tics, adhd related frustration and hyperactivity causes tics, tics cause more fatigue, mental health affects tics, stims become tics, tics become stims. Tics affect my speech, adhd affects my sleep which affects my fatigue. ADHD affects my eating, ocd affects my eating, lack of eating equals poor mental health equals more tics and more fatigue.

[ispyspookymansion]

why is every diagnosis of mental illness so connected to other things. Dont tell me its because diagnoses are just groupings of symptoms that often overlap and are impacted by one another and are not ontologically pure conditions that exist in isolation. Give me a different answer like The vitamin that controls mental illnesses is the same for all types and you are deficient

[inamindfarfaraway]

Eldest daughter syndrome is specifically about the intersectional stress of being both an older sibling and female. It’s not called ‘eldest child syndrome’ for a reason. Girls are already put under more pressure to be mature, responsible, helpful, nurturing, kind, supportive, emotionally intelligent, diplomatic, polite, composed and respectable regardless of birth order; they are often seen as growing up faster than boys and held to higher standards. Parents will (even subconsciously) assume that they can handle more chores and emotional labour. Being an older sibling - typically raised with higher expectations as a role model and caretaker for their younger siblings - compounds all of that. The overlap is where the anxiety, parentification, perfectionism and overachieving of eldest daughter syndrome arise. Even in families where the firstborn girl has one or more older brothers, those brothers frequently aren’t assigned as much responsibility and are allowed to be immature for longer by default. They can choose to take on that level of care! They may have it forced upon them by particular parents or circumstances! But that’s not the same as the cultural phenomenon resulting from how deeply ingrained misogyny interacts with family dynamics.

All this to say: Dick Grayson does not have eldest daughter syndrome. He can’t.

Yes, he has an excessive sense of responsibility. Yes, he has a guilt complex about protecting his family. Yes, he has many issues related to his siblings. But he has never experienced the stress of being a daughter or sister. It’s not like gender isn’t important to his character and he thinks of himself in androgynous terms. He strongly identifies as a son and brother. In fact, he didn’t become an older sibling until he was an adult, so it didn’t affect his childhood and adolescent development (and thus his fundamental sense of self) at all. He didn’t take on a pseudo-parental role with any of his siblings until and except Damian. According to canon, he didn’t spend much time with pre-death Jason. And he still hasn’t bonded very much with Cass.

Cass doesn’t really qualify for eldest daughter syndrome either. Oh, she’s the ultimate perfectionist, grew up way too fast, feels responsible for protecting everyone and has probably the worst guilt complex in the Batfamily, but none of her issues ar due to her role as a big sister. They’re all about her personal traumatic backstory and identity as Cain, Babs, Bruce and Shiva’s daughter (in that order timeline-wise). Her parents have all hurt her, but they’ve never treated her like a parent for other kids. Like Dick, she was an only child until her late teens/adulthood. She integrated into the Batfam slowly, has barely interacted with Jason or Damian in canon and her notable younger brother relationships, with Tim and Duke, are equal and healthy. She and Tim bonded as friends first before she was adopted. She never has to act as a designated caretaker for her younger siblings, and feels responsible for them the same way she feels responsible for everyone else. They take care of each other, lacking the imbalance of the unofficial ‘disorder’.

But you know who actually does have eldest daughter syndrome? As a huge, integral, consistent part of her identity in comics canon? Who’s never known life without it?

SELINA KYLE. CATWOMAN.

Her first solo series, the story that established her post-Crisis origin story and redefined her character into who she’s been since 1989, revolved around her relationships with her younger sisters Maggie and Holly. It was literally called Her Sister’s Keeper. If you want to write about Dick, please do, and I commend you for giving his pain, struggles and complexities their due. But if you want to read or write about has eldest daughter syndrome, Selina is objectively the better choice.

[rotpretty]

Men who fetishize mental health disorders of any kind deserve to be shot directly in the face.

[ourfag]

stede: so after this i was thinking we c—

stede: ed?

ed, staring at his phone like he’s trying to light it on fire with his mind:

stede: ed? is everything okay? did you get a text fr—

stede, Looking:

stede: ah. hm. well that’s

stede: that looks like a photo of our oven?

ed, still staring: yeah that’s cause it’s a photo of our oven

stede: oh, okay!

stede: …why?

ed: just. trying to remember if i turned it off

stede: …well—

ed: before we left

stede: —it does look like it’s off. in the picture

ed: yeah i can never remember whether i turned it off so i started taking pics before we go out

stede: and that’s what that is?

ed: that’s what that is, yeah

stede: well there you go!

ed: mmnmnm. yeah but.

stede: you did turn it off!

ed: what if it’s an old picture.

stede: oh. well—is there a time…stamp…?

ed: yeah i mean—okay, yeah, there it is, look. 11:23 today

stede: well that is right before we left

ed: yeah i took it right before we left

stede:

ed: shut up.

stede: i didn’t say anything!

ed: you were thinking it.

stede: i’m just—i don’t really get what you’re worried about, could you—

ed: i’m not—fuck off i’m not even fuckin’ worried, man, i just can’t—

stede: just help me understand. alright? because from where i’m standing it seems, to me, like everything’s fine.

ed: im litera—i just can’t remember whether i turned the oven off or not. that’s it.

stede, delicately: well…based on the photo of the oven, here, that you took right before we left, it looks like you…apparently did, in fact, turn the oven off

ed: yeah. but.

ed: i don’t remem—

ed: what if, y’know, what if i…turned it off and then took the photo and turned it back on and then we left?

stede: what? why???

ed: i don’t fucking know!!! i don’t remember turning it off, maybe i don’t remember turning it back on again!!!

stede: i mean, why would you turn it back on and then leave?? that’s not like you! you’ve never—

ed: still possible, though. like—

stede: —absolutely no reason! you’re fine, sweetheart, i’m positive—

ed: maybe my brain shut down for a second? you’ve seen my brain shut down

stede: oh, come on!

ed: like, sometimes i just do shit for no reason—

stede: your brain doesn’t shut down, it just—it’s got intricacies—

ed: —we’re gonna come home to a giant fucking heap of charcoal for a house because you’ve got a boyfriend who’s too stupid to use an oven.

stede: you are not too stupid to use an oven!!!

ed: do you wanna—maybe we should go back, just, like, to check—

stede: ed!! we go out all the time, we’ve gone out three times this week and every single time we come back it’s to a healthy, normal house! i trust you!

ed: yeah, big mistake. that’s how they get you. let your guard down, five minutes later, boom. kitchen’s gone.

stede: who’s “they”

ed: uh, stupid fucking boyfriends who don’t know how to use a fucking oven? who else

stede: well i haven’t got one of those. i’ve got an extremely smart, capable boyfriend who uses the oven all the time with absolutely no problem

ed: you don’t think this kinda counts as A Problem?

stede:

stede: okay look,

[thediamondarcher]

I'm not even exaggerating when i say that Charlie is the best OCD representation I've ever seen

I've had obsessive compulsive disorder for almost 10 years now and when i first read the heartstopper comics and i got to volume 4 (and also solitaire) i was really confused because i didn't know how OCD worked until then, it made me feel like i was seen and i realized it was because it's the first correct OCD representation I've ever seen

seeing a character with the same disorder as me and whose writing about the disorder isn't based in stereotypes or very incorrect things was one of the best things for my mental health, it allowed me to finally seek professional help because i realized i had an actual problem and i got diagnosed a couple of months ago

I will always be grateful for having Charlie as such an amazing representation <3

[dead123454]

in health class, and we have to choose a mental illness to study and I HAVE MOST OF THESE

im going to study bipolar depression cuz thats the one thats kickin my ass the most

[dorkhellbside]

idk what post it was but i lowkey agree with the idea of dirk gaining a substance addiction after minimal uses on a whim just to thug it out/struggle unnecessarily.

on the other hand for hal its the routine that draws her in. why do i feel like shit? ohh its because im going through withdrawal, good thing i can fix that easily :) (ignores the underlying undiagnosed mental issues)

its both about control issues