#try to change something small
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#feeling so proud and grateful today#two important LGBtQ projects that helped conceive got funding today#one in my own organisation that takes addresses the important LGBTQ angle to our issue and that nobody but me could have pulled off#so so proud of that#but then also another one#a networking project bringing together local bi+ orgs into a bigger umbrella#I am so so#just wanting to say to you all#do it#try to change something small#meet like minded people and together try to change something bigger#do the things only you could do#believe in them#persist#be patient#thank you universe#thank you funding committee for giving money to both projects#I am so going to enjoy being part of these projects for the next two three years#ten years after rainbow direction#I’ve turned my job into the next rainbow direction#I’ll be working with other LGBTQ and Bi+ folks#and will just be able to be me on a daily basis#and that’s SO freaking amazing
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Archery Nemesis.
[First] Prev <–-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#jin zixuan#wei wuxian#(Trying to not break my own continuity by showing WWX changing outfits in the middle of a comic...I'm doing my best...)#The original line for the third panel was just 'fuck you' which admittedly is a funnier line.#Wei Wuxian really does call JZX a little pretty boy (not in those words but close enough) and then dramatically one-ups him...#Not only that; he tries to use Lan Wangji's headband as a blindfold. Which I think we need to take a moment to analyze.#It's probably easiest to look at this as ship-tease but I think it's far more in line with how WWX's mask is slipping.#He knows full well how poorly touching LWJ's headband went in the past.#But somehow - in this moment of his anger being targeted at JZX - that crucial information is forgotten.#He's got tunnel vision over something so small...and what do we know about emotions that don't suit the supposed cause?#Why that would be displacement. Something is bothering him and it sure is *not* just Jin Zixuan's fancy ass.#WWX came back but he didn't come back the same. It's rather unsettling how it feels like he's putting on a performance of himself here.
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Li Yu is on!! a mission!! which is really hard to do when only one of your three currently viable forms have legs and it's not like. the ideal form.
#disabled tyrant's beloved pet fish#dtbpf#li yu#ye qinghuan#xiongfeng#piaoxue#dtbpf spoilers#on one hand this mission was actually pretty exciting#i really enjoyed it i was cheering li yu on! look at this clever fish!#but at the same time the sheer ridiculousness of it was out of this world and i love it so much#every time the man-mer form returns i die a little inside#like to be clear he can't fucking BREATHE when he's out of water like that#so he's essentially holding his breath while frantically running from one river to the next all with a giant fish head and waving fins#unreal. never change li yu#and also like... after this ye qinghuan MUST know that li yu is a mermaid right??? or something???#i REFUSE to believe he couldn't see a huge as fish tail in his koi pond especially not after li yu complained about how small it was#ye qinghuan even tried to play interference when prince li was questioning him#ye qinghuan has fully come to terms with the fact that his cousin has somehow managed to marry and impregnate his pet fish#and he's just going to try to be fucking normal about it because he actually likes li yu#what a hero#my art
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man, you know, nobody asked me, but I have such conflicting opinions on some of the fat falin art, where on one hand: it's always nice to see A Fat Body in fanart anywhere + it's being done in positive ways, for funsies and on the other hand, there is something so familiar about how you are automatically The Fat One if you are a woman simply standing next to a more petite woman, bc I've had a 0% hitrate in seeing people change Marcille's body type and keep Falin's, or change both of them. it's just Falin
#it gives me a negative feeling that I seldom/never get from seeing fat art which is rare#like she's not fat out of thin air For Fun And No Other Reason and she's not fat bc of context#(out of thin air being like just picking a character you like and changing their design just cuz. Kabru maybe.)#(and Because Of Context being the way ppl draw fat Usagi from sailor moon. which i have been meaning to do btw)#but rather she's fat just bc to be Not the thinnest woman in the room is to be fat. like it happens specifically by scale#because marcille is so much physically smaller and petite and falin is bigger in the ways that a Human Woman is bigger#than an elf woman#and it's funny bc it's something i see all the time already#people also really don't seem to have an interest in making marcille butch in fanart in a way#that is sort of sad for me bc it's like ah well she's the thin small one so of course she gets to be feminine#if you're physically bigger then of course you get to be masc of course of course of course...#i also love good butch art esp fat butch stuff but this is about the phenomenon where if you're with#a thinner shorter woman then that means you're the butch now which is a place I have been to#and I did not like it there#I think part of why That sticks it to me is bc marcille has such a Butch Girlfriend personality and falin acts so demure LMAO#but she's slightly bigger so the writing is on the wall#sergle.txt#Godspeed to you if you choose to read these thoughts in bad faith bc I can't give you more clarifying statements if I try#like I said. conflicting feelings#i don't know if anyone else has similar thoughts it May Just Be Me#I don't think ppl think about this stuff when they make their fan redesigns but it gives me a certain feeling
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OC stuff is dangerous wdym you just think about that guy and you feel things. You made that thing and it’s come such a long way like they’ve grown and fleshed out and you’re proud of them. And there’s an indescribable feeling of pride and tenderness and passion and fondness. That ☝️thingie is My Thing and I love them
#_text#put music on that makes you think of them while drawing them and feel one billion emotion and it’s like wow. hits you how much you care#each little brick placed being one more step to making them feel truly and wholly alive. something with hopes and dreams and fears#Rory has really been coming into his own lately and it makes me kinda emotional and I really do not get emotional about much#I really need to elaborate on some of it with art and just substantiate some of my thoughts and feelings cus there’s just so much#I don’t wanna be tooting my own horn cus this post is not just meant for me. it’s for anyone who’s going through their own process#of making a guy or refining an existing guy. be proud of yourself and step back to admire how they’ve grown!! you’d be surprised by#the various ways things form and add up to create something amazing and uniquely you. all the various sources of input and inspiration#that really is the joy of creation to me. and I love seeing how others characters grow and change and evolve. being part of that process#is especially deeply meaningful and important to me. nothing makes me happier than being a small part of someone else’s work#as someone who hates failing and loathes themselves deeply. I can sincerely say with my whole heart that just trying is an amazing step#put down literally anything. see what does and doesn’t work. get the feel for the kind of person they are and then refine that.#mix logic with your gut feeling. emotion with reason. use existing lore or make it up! creation and success is not linear and#it definitely is deeply demoralising at times and as someone pretty cynical about the whole thing. and who hates myself#I can say it really is worth it. your ideas are worth it and even if you don’t believe in yourself yet#the spirit of my post at least is cheering for you!! because seven+ months ago I was in a pit of nothingness and just.#making zero and putting her out there for the first time has changed so much for the better for me#I will always cheer on anyone’s OC stuff. they - and you - are awesome and should exist and be put out there#thank u for reading. this has been on my mind lately a few times so wanted to ramble
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Personal headcanon about the "you picked the wrong dellamorte" line, I don't think illario actually likes rook outside the context of them being someone close to lucanis. Like rook on their own isn't much to him, but when they meet it's yet another person talking about his cousin (why isn't he good enough for whatever job they're hiring for?) and on top of that they somehow bring him back from the dead (another whole can of worms for illario). Now he starts turning on the charm, but whether he's actually interested or this is just one more thing his cousin has that he doesn't and it gets under his skin, who knows. Either way, rook ignores illario, the guy who lives off his charm, and is instead interested in the guy who's never even dated before and thinks giving someone a knife is how to flirt. Infuriating
NO THANK YOU !! i am genuinely sorry if i have ever implied illario is into rook like i see some takes about it and unless it like ties into your rook's personal backstory i don't seriously think he's romantically jealous. at all. my enjoyment of that line stems from illario's pathological need to make it about himself and not see his strengths but what lucanis has, and therefore what he doesn't. he's annoyed enough to try and goad you in the middle of a fight about the 'wrong' dellamorte and completely blind to the fact that the venatori are at best, a stupid fucking alliance, and at worst, a cult that will devour the crows from the inside out and illario would have been the one to give them the keys. he sees lucanis make allies, needs his own, and instead of charming the other talons/houses as he should, he (probably spitefully) picks the venatori. or maybe he just thought it would be easier. ugh he makes me want to telekenetically throw him around
#and you raise a very hilarious point too LMFAO#not that he is jealous. just mad as hell its not working <3 I LIKE HIM VERY MUCH AND A NORMAL AMOUNT#to be clear i think his characterisation changed dramatically from wigmaker's job and a lot of his uh#very rash decisions about achieving power feels like they just needed a traitor character for lucanis#to really max out the use of spite. i really wish honestly that there was some canon support for illario#who would probably be a little more liked/popular than lucanis. bc lucanis is respected by the crows#but he's also a very distant 'dellamorte heir' figure. respect is not the same as being liked. so you know#there's the serious assassin with a rep for how good he is at killing#and there's a friendlier assassin with a rep for sweet talking#and neither of those reputations are necessarily true. but i know which one i'd be less afraid of#and i think illario would know that. and be able to use that. BUT WE DONT GET IT. WHATEVER.....#illario dellamorte#veilguard spoilers#answered#also we're introduced to an illario that understands being a crow. and has had all that drilled into him since childhood#why. would he. ally with the venatori.#why would he put himself into a situation that he couldnt control. other than 'the story needs a villain'#what im trying to say. is . there were the makings of a crow civil war here that ends with him tragically dead#if you asked me to expand on this i dont think i could. but like the main issue being the crows not standing together making#the antaam invasion worse (btw regarding this why the fuck were the antaam even invading) so lucanis' quest is#idk. something like uniting the crows together and potentially repairing his relationship w illario#or hardening him and convincing he needs to kill illario#this is me spitballing. dont even mind me#(glances at the 'illario mention' alarm going off in the background)#EDIT: AND ALSO IT JUST CAME TO ME#killing illario as an ending also makes lucanis first talon (oh we're really in the cycles now)#forgiving illario ends with illario becoming 'talon' tho he and lucanis work closely. like a ceo vs cfo#and ends with them repairing their relationship#in the ideal world lucanis would fully leave but im alright with crows making small steps towards becoming a bit healthier
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something’s wrong?
#heheh what a name for a town. borger. brother that is a samdwich!!#I could prob talk about what this means to me but I don’t wanna#actually nvm I just thought of a funny way to describe the feeling:#you have two wolves inside of you. one HATES everything it sees soooo much. the other only sees beauty. you’re jaded.#or something like that#I’m trying to be conscious about only bending man-made structures and objects#unless it just looks extra cool to bend the natural stuff too#not rly a critical commentary. the basic premise is to show you how fucked up these little towns are;#while also communicating how they’re typically found in naturally beautiful places.#weird right? like finding ruins. it’s like these places settled and then worldly-priorities changed and everything fell apart#but you can tell - usually - that somewhere in the history of these small towns someone said:#‘what a fucking sweet view. let’s make camp’#my art#glitch art#aesthetic#art#artwork#webcore#glitchcore#internetcore#abstract#artists on tumblr#photography#abstract art#distortioncore#glitch#weird art#americana#southern gothic#angels
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completely forgot i had written an LI!DOL!Vanida game mechanic and left her collecting dust on my google docs…
#. // ♡ 🌱 txt#vanida the idol#vanida thompson#my shayla…… im so sorry#i abandoned you…. i abandoned my girl……#which!!! like in dod#if vanida is a love interest#there would be a similar mechanic#but i think i’d probably change it to be a small mix of above#and a mechanic that if vanida catches you at work that she helps give you work tips#that helps double the income you make that day#but in turn making her run in encounters INCREDIBLY rare in rng so she’s like a lucky gold goose#because in dol where she is essentially the ‘handyman’ of town taking every job and helping anyone#to make money#in dod im gonna have her main source of income be her mail delivery job LMAO#to explain why she is constantly moving around all the time when she’s not in school#cause she does not stay still!!!!#she never will!#constantly a machine of productivity and extreme workaholic#if she is not doing something useful she gets ANTSY#but sorry rambling#yeah anyway#vanida’s dol mechanic is her themes being similar to rei in ng^#where there is this IMPORTANCE to her in the scheme of things#with so many important figures having eyes on her#and essentially the player tasked with balancing if they want to put to her to wolves or try to safeguard her for themselves#sort of thing#cause both can have its benefits
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The Hex
woodcut of my MoTW character !!!!! really happy with how this came out ^^
some struggling process under the cut
EDIT: had to revamp this whole thing, hopefully it shows up now
#woodcut#woodblock#woodblock print#woodcut print#print#motw#monster of the week#Wesley Bernavelli#my art#my oc#printmaking#AUGH genuinely so happy with how this came out#boy was trying to transfer it to the board a struggle tho#i COULD have just like. used transfer paper or something along those lines but i was both STUBBORN. AND. i wanted to draw it myself#plus all the changes i needed to make#needless to say this took a lot of back and forth comparing photos in my drawing program and then adjusting and then comparing again#you can see how many phases the hand holding the lantern went through#this was a TON of fun tho!!!!!#super SUPER proud of how this came out i think it looks so awesome#so many small details tho...... why did i do that to myself#also wasnt expecting the brown paper to be as fantastic as it is!!!!!#it's my favorite between the white and brown papers
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What's so fun about BruJay as a ship is Jason's sheer obsessive devotion to Bruce. Jason is possessive over Bruce, to the point he doesn't care about the deaths of others so long as he has Bruce's attention. A part of the UTRH arc this isn't talked about enough is that Bludhaven fucking explodes mid-way and Jason won't let Bruce see if Dick is alive.
batman (1940) #650
A lot of discussion about UTRH paints Jason as this anger-driven cold, calculating machine up against Bruce when it's so clear that his love for Bruce is what drives him at his root, even if he won't acknowledge it. He says it himself, he would've done anything if it was Bruce who'd died instead of him and his anger is rooted in that possessive devotion not being reciprocated.
batman (194) #650
BruJay as a ship always to be, to some level, unrequited. Even if Bruce loves Jason back in that way, he'll never be that obsessed with Jason. Jason will always view Bruce's love for Dick or Tim to be a distraction, proof that Bruce isn't dedicated enough to him. Jason has the need to always have Bruce's attention, even when it could come at the cost of Bruce's other loved ones. Something something cannibalism as a metaphor for love in how Jason wants to consume Bruce's whole existence. He can't let Bruce leave him again, can't let Bruce love or grieve anyone else. Forcing Bruce to choose between Jason and the Joker isn't just about confronting Jason's killer, it's about confronting the other person who exists as this duality with Bruce and consumes so much of Bruce's life. That's the role Jason wants to fill, calling himself Red Hood and forcing Bruce to look at what he's become. But still loving Bruce and wanting more than anything for Bruce to reciprocate that love in the way that Jason understands. I just think it's good soup and rife with Dynamics that are underexplored with them.
#necrotic festerings#brujay#jaybruce#jaybru#jason todd x bruce wayne#batcest#i've had this thought in my head for a while#i was just weirdly shy about posting it? like convinced myself it's not as verbose as some of my other thoughts#also GOD why is the art of this arc SO BAD.#i can't take it SERIOUSLY#i hate looking at it.#the faces. why are the faces like that.#brujay needs more love bc jesus#gotham war had some good brujay content but i am still too bitter to discuss that shitshow. so. ignoring it for now.#bruce changing jason's brain chemistry as an act of love is the most FUCKED UP brujay thing ever tho#it's so Them.#sorry that is just peak brujay. they are incapable of meeting in any middle and always trying to change each other.#maybe this meta should've been about that.#but then i'd have to use new-52 and rebirth panels so eh. nvmd.#this page makes it seem like i hate post-flashpoint comics. i don't i swear#they just interest me less for batcest.#like oh yay everyone's getting along and working together.#it only came at the expense of throwing away decades of character work. small sacrifice.#i need to stop posting meta at fucking 5 am.#no one is going to see this bc i can't be a normal person.#wrote this while watching invincible#which is pretty good so far but man the ending of ep1 clocked me. i was absolutely bamboozled.#i had something else i was going to say in the tags but i lost it.#anyway most of this is a ship post and projecting shit as per usual and yk. not serious comic media.#i'm just silly and gay.
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there's a self-help/mental health adjacent post that's going around and it seems to be really helpful for a lot of people which is very good. I also personally hate it with all my fucking heart
#it's the anhedonia one btw lmao#if i. have to be exposed to one more goddamn cbt-ass advice post in my life. I will start tearing throats out with my teeth#and I will have earned the right to because I've been through the fucking TRENCHES over the years man#I think it's the appeal to urgency at the end however ruefully humorously packaged that ohohoho. really grrrrinds my gears.#this is obviously not what the person is trying to do with that but the unavoidable implication that the reason you might still#be suffering is that you just haven't tried hard enough to change to like things to open your eyes... hey. respectfullly. fuck off#peak advice for mild to moderate symptoms of mental illness thoughtlessly presented as universally applicable#without any consideration for the deeper thing you're saying -- that if someone is in a real bad way and DOESN'T get better#it's their own responsibility and they just haven't tried hard enough. in trying to be kind you are being so desperately cruel#to the people who are struggling the most. bitch I am fucking GREAT at liking things! it's one of my best skills!! I'm generally curious!#my capacity for enthusiasm and intellectual joy over any old thing that strikes my fancy is legendary and often I suspect quite annoying!!!#so when anhedonia completely envelops me I know it's a sign of something else and bigger going on in the background#it's not a choice. the brain is not solely a cognitive machine!! you cannot fix everything that can go awry with it by Thinking Better!!!#cbt must be great for the people it's great for and I'm sincerely genuinely glad for it. less suffering in the world is great#but it is a way of thinking that is a hammer and you just have to hope like fuck your problem is a nail. because otherwise#you're bruised from being beaten with hammers and the additional shame of what's wrong with you that it's not helping#and again I recognize very keenly that this is not a space meant entirely for me. people sharing resources that amn are not about me#is not only fine it's good it's great! however. it'd also be nice to not get thrown under the fucking bus for once#because my presence fully expressed is an uncomfortable reminder of the things we *cannot* control about our own brains lmao#I'm lucky that I've been in the game long enough and have enough resources to start to smell the bullshit here but...#the pain 'losing years' induces in you when you don't have *a fucking choice* -- because it's not a matter of willpower#or positive thinking or changing your mindset. you're just sick. in a way medicine hasn't quite figured out how to help yet.#well. maybe. maybe don't put that on someone huh. maybe don't make their 'lost years' to depression and doomscrolling or whatever#'their own fault'. I kind of think that's possible to do without submitting to doomposting. is all.#(I feel the same about the 'resting vs. rotting' idea. well friend sometimes the best I can hope for is some gentle rotting#thanks for introducing this layer of disgust and condemnation to the general despair. it's added a patina)#this might actually be the first time I've managed to hold on to my own anger about this rather than it getting drowned out by shame tho#which as steps forward go. *sigh* it's not a moon landing is it. but a small step for man nevertheless I suppose
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my thoughts on The Murderbot Show:
idk man
#i pressed play with the same energy you'd get from someone trying to disarm a bomb#it looks fun enough. and the changes are fine. i guess#i think i'm still hung up on the CGI#i dont. like it.#which is nothing new tbh this is why i rarely watch live action stuff#i want to say that i would have liked it if i wasn't so attached to the books already. but idkkkkk#my vision for the scavengers reign style murderbot show seems to hinder my ability to enjoy the show's visuals. rip i guess#the murderbot show#murderbot#mbtv#i think i'll try and write down my proper thoughts once the entire season has released bc#uuuuuugh so far my biggest concern is how they're handling the whole "space hippies PresAux'' thing#like. i wouldn't be surprised if them presenting PresAux in such an unserious manner is so viewers can be surprised once they#get down to proper business or whatever. at least. that's what i'm hoping for#but i also wouldn't be surprised if the adaptation just. dumbed them down a bit. for some reason#same with whatever's going on with Mensah. i feel like i just haven't seen enough of the changes to form a concrete opinion on that#i love how they did Ratthi. he's perfect 10/10 no notes#i enjoy what they're doing with Gurathin (even though i very much preferred 2nd gen immigrant Gurathin whose knowledge of the CorpRim#comes from horror stories passed down by his parents) (that's still my book interpretation of him)#Still torn on Pin-Lee and Arada getting with Ratthi like. yknow what actually i don't care about that one.#i prefer to keep my romances fully in the background + in fanworks but. who gaf#uhhhh what else is there#oh god i fear the day that blond lady comes on screen. i hope to they handle whatever's going on there well#i'll forgive the crime of adding her uncomfortable comments to the show if someone tells her off for all that!!!!!!!#and while i enjoy the visual style of sanctuary moon. i'm still surprised it seems to be some space adventure show?????#i was expecting it to be more of a legal drama or something. with moodier visuals but. whatever i guess that's a small detail#i'll be fine as long as we have the solicitor and her bodyguard#mmm yea i don't have anything else for now. send post#ramblings
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i'm making a character page
#i just want something where you can click the sim and it shows a link to their gameplay and character tag#and i'll make everyone a pinterest board too#the macmahons aren't here yet because i have a dilemma#do i put them all as young adults#or as their most recognisable era#like elder gael and teen rox#or just all as young adults#someone make this decision for me i can't do it#need to make a new pose for virgil i don't like this one#and tweak sawyers a bit#also need to change someone's pants. they can't all wear jeans 😭#this is queued i'm gonna try and code it today when i wake up :)#daithí so small....
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A second fan region has officially hit the sketchbook guys.
Transcript: Bone Factory (I wont transcribe the diagram ehhhhh). Platform Spiders transport blocks to nearby facilities, and the train station as well after the transport rail (take a shot every time I say transport) collapses due to poor ground stability.
Approximate layout.
The area around the factory is filled with pollution and sinkholes, and shrouded in darkness due to being in the iterator’s shadow. There are a few inactive rooms (in the factory) due to lowered demand for bone.
Mechanics are hostile to all creatures in the factory regardless of reputation, but become neutral after Time Traveller’s drone is fixed by An Iris of Hues. The same can’t be said for the sentries.
A coloured pearl in the factory contains some old production records. Iris will go on 16 tangents.
(Transcript end)
So basically there are three sub-areas, firstly, a section with firmer ground where a few sentries patrol, creatures that call down Miros Vultures when they spot the player, or any other creature excluding Mechanics. Secondly, an area flooded with acid and marked by sinkholes, if one doesn’t feel like parkouring through wreckage platform spiders can be ridden like raindeer if they are walking in the right direction (will not turn around no matter what). Thirdly, there is the factory itself, partially lit and filled with aging but still active machinery and Mechanics that will kindly escort you out of the premise via electrocution to death.
I did a coloured concept drawing of this area at school but i uh. Don’t have it. BYE
#my post#my art#rain world oc#rain world#rain world fan creatures#rain world fan region#i remembered the fact that rain deer skulls are white recently and uh. i will not let this small caveat stop my fun headcanon#im just gonna say the scavengers painted them white or something#or maybe alter the theory to state that creature’s bones and their mechanical components are different afterall#id have to change this place’s name for that.#dang.#anyways i am thinking of doung a comic of AIOH ‘reading’ (heavy quotation marks) the aformentioned pearl to time traveller#more like summarising and then yapping about the factory for a minute and going on a tangent and trying to get back on course and then#going on yet another tangent before apologising profusely for being such a bore#i love having ocs lol
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[ All systems stable. Charging... battery currently at 31% ] [ WARNING: UNDERGOING REPAIR. DO NOT DISTURB.] [ Diagnostics report available. View? [ YES ] [ NO ] ] [ Diagnostics report available. View? - > [ YES ] [ NO ] ]
[ ... LOADING ... ]
[ Multiple injuries present. ]
[ Internal components damaged. ]
[ Damage located in: HEART ] [ Damage located in: STOMACH ] [ Damage located in: LUNGS ] [ Stomach pierced. Several stab wounds present. Repair at 28% ] [ Heart pierced. One stab wound present. Repair at 63% ] [ Lung pierced. One stab wound present. Repair at 51% ] [ Arm damaged. Signs of dismemberment present. Muscle repair at 33%; delayed ] [ Blood flow: semi-stable. More blood recommended. Any kind will do. ] [ Brain activity: stable. Repair at 100% ] [ Sorry for scaring you guys. Thanks for dragging my sorry carcass back here. ] [ ... Can you stay? Please? Or could you let Skip in? Or... turn on the TV? It hurts and I kind of need a distraction. Ha. I sound so stupid. Why did I do that? ]
[ Repair time: 3 HOURS ]
#he's a killer queen... {ic}#//technically? it's more of a drabble#//i wanted to try and write something a tad more related to lambda's tech?#//not sure if i succeeded but it was a fun exercise! also went and tossed in lambda talking through whatever screen he's plugged into-#//-since that tidbit's kicking around on this blog somewhere#//idk what's going up with parts of the text changing from green to black though?#//i think it's doing something similar to tiny text being bigger for some reason even when all of the text was small before editing#//that's stupid. anyways not so funny recovery moments feat his thoughts in tiny text because they can't NOT seep through#injury mention#dismemberment mention
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i know what tattoo millie doesn’t have, because during the short period where lucifer’s possessing her, she keeps taking the wheel of the vessel to go and get herself the ugliest cartoon devil tattoos money can buy. lucifer is wasting precious grace getting those off of her body because he can’t stand them, and then she just goes and gets another one in a couple days time.
#there’s a lot of ways in which The Possession of Millie Winchester is the part of her life thats the least like a horror story#and one of them is this. that the tattoos are something she can get and lucifer can erase and she can get again#it’s a negotiation of autonomy on a small scale. she’s doing this to annoy him. and he’s not stopping her. and at the end of the day it’s#his reserves that he has to draw on to change it back. millieverse lucifer does not come out of the cage a second time completely whole.#(which is part of the reason that this negotiation stage is. possible. because he Has to. at first. because beggars can’t be choosers#and millie’s body comes with terms he can either agree with or risk his luck trying to possess someone else while amara’s loose and he’s#barely holding himself together.#by the time that he is strong enough and capable of overtaking her vessel entirely and kicking her into the corner of her mind. well.#he doesn’t. because this is working. because there’s an understanding.#and on millie’s end. well. she’s not unaware of the precarious position she’s put herself in. and she’s not unaware that lucifer. isn’t#taking advantage. that she’s getting on his nerves and disagreeing with him and wrestling control from him constantly.#there’s something built there. it’s a little bit like respect.#which is obviously why it can’t continue. the most violating part of being possessed by Lucifer for Millie is that neither of them got to#choose when it ended.)#spn oc
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