a-specconfessions

[a-specconfessions]

I can’t hold it anymore. I (aroace, ex mormon) know one of the stars of “My Husband’s Not Gay”. Not sharing names for privacy reasons but he still very much believes in what he’s doing.

Anyways, every time i see him, I can’t help but be jealous of him. He’s the type of queer person that my family would accept, who wouldn’t be isolated from their community, who wouldn’t get their car keyed on the rare occasion they went to church. I wish I was that good at being “not gay” and I hate myself for being so envious of an obviously harmful mindset.

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[a-specconfessions]

im aroace and havent told anyone in my real life about it and i just overheard my dad tell my mom "we're all human and its human nature to have sexual attraction to either men or women, everyone experiences it" so. Yeah I dont think ill ever come out

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[a-specconfessions]

Amatonormativity (as a A-Spec person) is a special type of HELL occupying the world - because it’s not only heavily normalized within media and society, but is also quite normalized within multiple parts of the Queer community as well.

*Sends Confession*

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[a-specconfessions]

i’ve realized over the course of the last few months that i might be demi and it’s been a lot to process. i’ve identified as just aroace for years and then i met someone this year who has changed my perception of a lot of things. i’m happy about this there’s just waves of overwhelm (not necessarily good or bad in nature) as i process.

i want to find more demi people to talk to

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[a-specconfessions]

One of my best friends is getting married, another is moving away, the third told me a few days ago that she thinks she is ready to date again after a horrible breakup she had a year ago and I helped set up her profile. And me well I'm just here. 26 years old and watching it all disappear. I'm so scared of being lonely. I hate this.

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[a-specconfessions]

Sending this cuz I need to get it off my chest but idk if this is the place to do it

I think I'm asexual

I've known for a while this is probably the case, but I still have,, a sort of libido. I've been dating this person for a while and we've done ✨spicy✨ stuff before and I've genuinely... Never enjoyed it. I enjoy the lead up to it, but not the actual doing. It's only recently that I've realized 1. I don't have to do it if I don't want to, and 2. I've been doing stuff I don't like for a While. Complex complicated feelings and I don't know if they'll last. Feel a bit of relief I don't have to do things if I don't want to and like,, I might just be asexual (putting this here my partner has NEVER coersed me into anything)

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[a-specconfessions]

I know this one is darker but I kinda just need to put this. Somewhere.

Yes, being aroace - specifically apothi aroace - has given me a little bit of a superiority complex kinda. Because pretty much no matter what I do, where I go, what I see, everything's about sex. The people I perform with, the performances I see, the stories I read, the shows and movies I watch, everything. is. about. sex. and. romance.

And I. don't know what to do about that. Because how am I supposed to work with anyone if I can't trust they have the mental faculties to *set that aside* and work on the task at hand? How am I supposed to know if they have the wherewithal to not be entirely driven by body reflexes?

The only differences I've found is that most of the queer community is more understanding about it than Straight Culture TM. They're more supportive, more respectful and acceptive of different flavors of orientation, different intensities, different preferences and everything.

How am I meant to navigate knowing that most of the world doesn't give their actions a moment of thought and is fully motivated by "when can I next Hit That with someone"? Infodump posts were the only thing I was able to trust for a while, and then...then that was dashed.

Anyway hope your day's going well and may your pillow be cold

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[a-specconfessions]

allos putting some mf they picked up from the street over their friends they've known for years & then wondering why are their aspec (not exclusively) friends mad gotta be the biggest insolence ever.

Bonus if they're then wondering why they lack any friends but do this shit.

Or that they're just forcing themselves to go through relationships even if they claimed how much repulsive they are to them.

I "love" getting my 8 year long one destroyed over this bs 😍🥰

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[a-specconfessions]

me finally figuring out that i am, in fact, aroace but then this guy waltzes into my life and i??? like him??? like that????? hello??? i have never had a crush in my life what is this

good news tho i recently figured out im probably aegosexual 🎉

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[a-specconfessions]

I have absolutely no idea what people mean when they say they love someone but they don't like them. Like??? Literally how are you falling in love with someone you don't even like? Why are you spending enough time around someone you don't like that you develop love for them?

I see so many fandom/shipping posts that are like "X character doesn't just love Y character they also like them" as if it's some kind of big deal. What?? How are those mutually exclusively? I'm so confused

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[a-specconfessions]

I'm aroace and recently bc of Halloween my closest friend and i did our usual thing of talking about what we should be next year. He suggested Jedediah and Octavius (i would be Octavius) and we both know those two are commonly shipped and literally went from talking about doing a duo costume to talking about how those two are 100% together. I know I'm probably overthinking it but im scared bc if he likes me like that i might lose him as a friend and i really don't want to lose him. (he does know im aroace btw)

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[a-specconfessions]

i’ve identified as aroace for years and i still do but i am enamored by my roommate and think i romantically like them a little bit but it’s not fully romantic and i think it’s either alterous or queerplatonic. i just want to be close to them. i rarely get crushes and i’ve never had feelings to this degree. i’m glad that the fact that i’m realizing i’m more on the aroace spectrum than i thought isn’t freaking me out like it has a little in the past.

our friendship has blossomed and it continues to every time we talk. they’re the easiest person to talk to and we never run out of things to talk about. we have the same interests and sense of humor and similar thoughts about things. they’re such a beautiful person in so many ways and i can’t believe they exist and that i’m fortunate enough to know them

i was dealing with it and it was sweet and cute (and still is) but i realized a few weeks ago they might be flirting with me and i haven’t been able to tell and neither have my other roommates who’ve i’ve told but they’ve told me they think that might be true. i don’t want to make our friendship weird if i’m misreading things. i will always wonder if i don’t tell them and i would be devastated if i found out too late.

i’m so beyond grateful to know them but i’m really sad because they’ll be moving out in the spring. i know i am going to miss them for the rest of my life because they’re that special. I’ve never met anyone like them. they make me feel like the best version of myself and so happy to be alive

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[a-specconfessions]

boyfriend stopped feeling sexual desire entirely when i got with him bc he knows i’m ace is this a W

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[a-specconfessions]

A friend showed me a very nsfw AI character website and I entertained myself talking to a saucy character about my uni subjects. It was a hilarious way to study tbh

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[a-specconfessions]

i thank god for making me ace because if i had a person to channel all of this horniness to, it would not be good

sincerely, an ace with a high libido lol

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[a-specconfessions]

Hi so at this point I think I might just stop identifying as acespec bc I feel like none of it describes me. I am not allo but I'm not ace I'm not any of it. I will just continue along my merry life and if I find someone I like who I think is hot, and I'm brave enough to try, I'll try. It's whatever. Not a big deal.

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[a-specconfessions]

every day my microlabel soup grows. i began at asexual and aromantic. snatched up aegosexual the minute i discovered what it was, hesitantly added aceflux and fictosexual afterwards, recently acquired aegoromantic and fictoromantic, and eyeing orchidsexual consideringly. it's a beautiful day for microlabels and they make me happy, but also if ever they start feeling too constricting i'm yeeting them into ocean, and daily reminder that you can do whatever you want with regards to labels yippee

Same! I love collecting labels

(I didn’t realize I had so many submissions I thought it was empty-oops!)