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heyyyy i wrote fic again for the first time in months!!

this is a fun but also sad little pre-canon oneshot where 13 year old tomboy fiona realizes that debbie is becoming a girly girl and it goes into their sisterly relationship because i love the gallagher sisters with all my heart 🥹🩷

i’m also working on a second oneshot for this same collection that should be posted shortly!!

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shauna shipman is so tragic to me because like...the girl who you shared your very being with dies and each segment of you that holds her is slowly rotting away. You sit beside her corpse and while your guilt and malice and devotion can hold her form, it won't feed your hunger. So you eat her ear, because you will always be the first to consume her, then the other girls eat her too because nothing gets to be yours alone when it comes to her. But her flesh feeds your baby, and when you give birth, she becomes part of him too. Then he dies too, and you bury him in the snow, so he can be yours alone, so he can know the cold like Jackie did. And then your rescued, and you latch onto anything that remains of her. Her favorite flower covers your walls, you see her parents every week, her boyfriend is yours and your daughter is her. And then you realise, they can be taken too. So you isolate yourself, let that severing wound she left become necrotic, because you've tried healing it with others, but it just takes them too. Then you meet a guy. He's funny and makes you feel young, and he's devoted to you the way she was. And that rotting wound begins to seal up. But you grow suspicious, and those months of fear fog your mind, and your scared, so you do what you know best. You bite. And now he's dead. And the wound is open again.

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imagine: 12-13 year old tomboy fiona completely changes her personality the minute baby debbie develops a girly girl personality and it’s awkward and it’s messy but fi is determined to give her little sister the girlhood she never got

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fiona gallagher // runs in the family by amanda palmer

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for @gardenerian <3

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the mob mentality of shameless TikTok is scary like none of them can think for themselves. they all just repeat each other and things they’ve heard without saying anything actually of substance and doing any sort of reflection on the characters. it’s all just the same regurgitated takes and when someone disagrees with one of them they all just dog pile on that person but they lose their mind if anyone does that to them lol

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3 weeks until i start student teaching and hhhhhhh i’m not ready i’m not ready i’m not ready what am i doing guys

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Fiona Gallagher x male reader headcanons✨

1. she leaves you for a woman

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I love my mom so much, and I know she was going through a lot, but I was the kid. I deserved a strong, stable caregiver who didn't need me for emotional support. Someone I could lean on without worrying that they'd fall apart.

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Oh but Fiona getting an abortion because every one is constantly relying on her and she has no time to herself versus Debbie going through with the pregnancy because she's terrified that everyone is going to abandon her and that she'll end up all alone :(

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fiona and her kids

today on shameless metas with annie, we’re going to talk about why it’s so important that the writers let fiona canonically decide she doesn’t want kids of her own. because it’s not just about the fact that she raised her siblings since many of them were babies, it’s not just about her becoming their legal guardian, and it’s not just about them viewing her as their mom in certain regards (TWs for brief talks of abortion/miscarriage)

fiona not wanting kids of her own is vital in the context of the show itself. first off, she’s the only female main character on the show who does not carry a baby to term or already have biological children of her own prior to the start of the show. that alone is such a breath of fresh air in a show where being a mother is so ingrained in every other major female character. and it’s especially important considering that she’s been playing this patriarchal trad wife type role in the gallagher family as frank’s chief enabler for so long. no other leading female character is allowed to coast on casual sex for the majority of the show. even when she tries to have a longer term relationship or commit to a marriage, it doesn’t work. why is that you ask? because the whole notion of the long haul is fundamentally incompatible with fiona’s character. she inherited her parents’ impulsiveness, and that in itself is her fatal flaw. every decision she makes is driven by it, and because it is literally impossible to impulsively decide to have a baby (you can decide you want a baby, you can decide to have sex/get pregnant, but pregnancy/true motherhood are not impulsive decisions), it wouldn’t work at all with her character. square peg, round hole.

even in the context of raising her siblings, fiona’s whole character is built on impulsive decisions, recklessness, and wild abandon. to even suggest that she’s the type of woman who would consciously, and with full agency, commit to raising her own babies for at least two decades is lunacy. it goes against everything she aspires towards and everything she wants for herself, especially later in the show. committing 9–10 months for a pregnancy and another 18+ years to a child (and a boyfriend/husband/father on top of that) is so obviously anti-fiona that it would literally destroy her character to have her backpedal into consensually having a child, even if the hypothetical father didn’t stay in her life.

fiona pins her distaste towards having kids on raising her siblings, but in reality it’s also the fact that there is literally no space in her life to raise a child. even if she didn’t have her siblings to worry about, by the time she would have been considering having kids, she’s already made multiple attempts to start a career for herself and she’s continuously been jumping from man to man for instant gratification. the one commitment she’s locked herself into is the one she’s literally forced into out of pure obligation and devotion towards her (in the beginning) infant/toddler siblings who could not fend for themselves. and by the time she realizes what she’s doing, she just keeps going because what is she gonna do, leave two mentally unstable young adults, two preteens, and a preschooler on their own?

now of course, the natural thought is "she's essentially been a mom to her siblings all these years, what's the big deal about having a kid of her own?" fiona may be the closest thing her siblings had to a mom, but she is not their mom. she does not have the maternal instincts that mothers develop from the moment their child is born, because her siblings are not her biological children. she may act maternal, but she’s not inherently a mother at any point. she knows how to love her siblings, but loving your own child is completely different. she’s seen what the lack of a mother’s support and love can do to a kid and she knows that if she’s not 100% sure she could love that kid unconditionally, she should not have kids. so that’s what she does. also, having a kid at 25 or 30 is also essentially hitting the reset button on this big countdown timer she’s had going for almost two decades. it’s why she was so against franny being born (obviously it was insane of her to make debbie’s pregnancy about herself, but it was a very valid fear to have). in the same vein, fiona’s decision to have an abortion was so necessary for her, not only because a baby would quadruple the absolute shitstorm her life already was in s6, but because it goes along with everything her character is meant to represent. she never second guesses herself even when her family tries to talk her out of it, and she never feels any sort of guilt or shame in having an abortion. and honestly i think that that’s just amazing, particularly the fact that she has the option and pursues it actively instead of coincidentally miscarrying (so that narratively she’s not the one to blame for “killing” the baby) or having the kid and going through some forced “learning to love the child because that’s your baby and you’re their mother” arc.

also, in season 8 she maintains her aversion to having kids, which is even more crucial because it shows how even though most of her siblings were over 18, she doesn’t need to be a mother to feel satisfied in her life anymore. when her siblings are little, she says outright that mothering them makes her feel wanted. she doesn’t leave with jimmy steve because she feels her kids need her. but in seasons 7 and 8, she starts living her life independently, moves out, and makes her own money purely for herself. she’s found other ways to feel fulfilled. she never feels some “unexplained void in her soul” now that she isn’t a full time matriarch to her siblings anymore. she is allowed to be her own person, she’s allowed to grow as a character, and she’s allowed to have her own identity. even though she loves her siblings, her life starts to gradually revolve less and less around them, and she’s allowed to be okay with that. so many times a female character will have this major character development, and then suddenly a love interest or a reminder of their past life comes knocking at their door and they’re right back where they started. but not fiona. fiona has goals and ambitions that are purely personal, and we get to see her start to achieve them. and even when she spirals in season 9, she doesn’t regress as a character. she doesn’t seek out the comfort of being wanted because she doesn’t deem that as the most important thing in her life anymore. fiona’s s4 spiral and her s9 spiral are two completely different events (they both involve heavy abuse of substances, but that’s really the only thing they have in common), and this demonstrates how her character has evolved over the course of the show. her s4 spiral ends with her taking personal responsibility for her actions and not blaming them on being some helpless little kid or a victim of her circumstances. meanwhile, in s9, she takes what she’s learned from this and applies it to other areas of her life. she is her own person with her own agency and freedom, and the best way to use that autonomy is to start over somewhere else. deciding to have a kid at that point in her life would not only feel shoehorned in for the sake of meeting some BS societal quota, but once again it would undermine everything her character has been building towards for nine seasons.

so in summary, it is so so incredibly important that the writers never made fiona have her own kids or even want to have her own kids someday because doing so would refute the core of her character. it would lump her in with every other wife and mother in the show and reduce her character to an aspect that should always be secondary (for many women, but especially for her). motherhood was always forced on fiona; it was never her choice, and making it into her choice would not be some badass act of ownership/reclamation. instead it would require her to sacrifice everything she’s worked for and hoped for just for the sake of appeasing the patriarchy, thereby undoing every ounce of development she had undergone throughout her time on the show.

tl;dr : the shameless writers fucked a lot of shit up across 11 seasons but i have to defend them on this topic because god they knew what they were doing by continually having fiona outwardly oppose having kids of her own.

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Fiona haters love to hold her to the same level of responsibility as they do Frank and Monica like she wasn't barely an adult throughout most of Shameless

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In the back of my mind, you died.

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the day i stop letting one person who i’m realistically never gonna talk to or see again after this year absolutely fuck with my head in every way shape and form is the day i know peace

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The Gallaghers as dysfunctional family archetypes

Source: Friel, John and Linda (1998). “Adult children: the secrets of dysfunctional families” pp. 57-61.

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recently joined the lesbian fiona bandwagon and now i need to express my hcs & analysis on debbie/fiona realizing they’re lesbians:

debbie secretly prints out the lesbian masterdoc when she first starts to struggle with having/finding a bf. she skims it and brushes it off (bc comphet/repression), shoving the pages between her mattress and boxspring so no one can dig them out of the trash and interrogate her. she forgets about them for years and just continues to try to fit in with other girls and gets pregnant and has franny. and franny is her everything and she thought maybe franny could fix her and make her appreciate and love a man for giving franny to her but oh fuck there’s still something missing.

so later on when she’s older and genuinely having an identity crisis, one day she takes the sheets off her bed to wash them and she finds the old crumply lesbian masterdoc pages peeking out. she steals one of ian’s blankets from his bed (bc he’s in jail and she wishes more than anything he could talk her through all this but at the same time knows he wouldn’t ever fully understand. but at least he’s here in spirit). and she reads that shit cover to cover under her blanket with a flashlight and makes the most scribbled manic nonsensical annotations all over the pages to the point where the paper is made of more pen strokes than original text. she rereads the doc every night until she falls asleep for a week straight. she puts herself in every hypothetical situation, conjures up random male fictional characters/celebrities to deny the truth, looks over at her baby and feels the worst kind of guilt that she doesn’t know how to love the 50% of her own kid that came from a man. and then she falls in love with a girl for the first time, like REALLY in love, and all that doubt and anxiety just disappears and it’s them and franny against the world and nothing could make her happier.

okay and then fiona is a whole different ballpark. she doesn’t have the time or energy for such insane levels of self-discovery. she’s so focused on her kids that thinking about who she loves is like the furthest thing from her mind. she knows she *can* be happy with a man, she knows that she enjoys sex with men in theory, she doesn’t see any other option for herself besides what she’s been doing, going through the motions. i imagine younger/teenage fiona inherited her parents’ fucked up ideas and perceptions about sex and relationships and so the bar for her is literally on the floor. she’s perfectly fine just engaging in meaningless sex and impulsive relationships that end sooner than they begin and throwing herself and her worth away to keep the men in her life happy. these relationships come to her naturally because she’s been doing this for so long, likely since middle/high school. she doesn’t care if the guy is objectively bad for her or if she fucks him every night or if she marries him after only knowing him for a week because none of it really holds any weight to her. she dates guys who can provide for their kids because it doesn’t matter if they’re good for her as long as her kids are happy. to her, relationships with men are just standard practice. it’s not so much about genuinely being in love, it’s about the benefits and the recklessness and the constant need to throw herself into chaos lest she feel completely useless.

and then along the way she meets jasmine and angela and nessa (and probably others too). and whoa boy everything gets flipped on its fucking head. she finally starts to understand what people mean when they say their S/O or crushes give them actual butterflies in their stomachs. she gets excited imagining herself being intimate with them. it’s not some chore or some ritual/routine that just exists for the sake of feeling connected, it’s an *actual* connection. it’s confusing as fuck because it’s not like she’s actually ever been with a girl before so she doesn’t understand what about it makes her feel so giddy, but the feeling doesn’t go away. the way she interacts with these women she barely knows is SO different than the guys she dates and sleeps with and even marries because these women have such fresh perspectives and raw energy that excites her. they care about her in a genuine sort of way, they’re tender and gentle but also loud and bold and confident all at once and it’s the actual coolest thing.

her biggest struggles come with the fact that she’s realizing her sexuality relatively late in life. she feels repulsed by identifying as a lesbian because of the whole “gold star” rhetoric, and because what nearly 30-year-old dates and sleeps with and marries dozens of men since they were a teenager and then suddenly goes “mm actually i’m gay”? it’s all so pointless to her and it doesn’t compute in her brain that there’s more than one way to be a lesbian. and i think debbie coming out first would help her with this; even though she dismisses it (because deep down she’s projecting her own experiences and beliefs about sexuality onto debbie), she realizes that damn, her kid sister is way happier than she’s ever seen her with any of those other losers. so when fi leaves for florida, she figures it’s the perfect time to reinvent herself and start fresh. no strings attached, no ghosts of past relationships haunting her. she’s free to be with whoever she wants and no one has to know anything else beyond her present self. (although moving to florida as a newly discovered lesbian is definitely a choice given everything that goes on there relating to LGBTQ+ issues, but it’s something new for her at least. tbh i imagine she only stays in florida for like a year or two max, makes some money, gets a gf, and moves with her to somewhere else much more tolerant and vibrant and similar but not identical to home).