amethysworld - Tumblr blog

[amethysworld]

I just finished reading Klara and the Sun and I've been dealing with it

As my partner said, when I was telling them how at one point the mother wanted Klara to continue being Josie, that Klara was close to almost becoming human, but ultimately not valued as one.

And it broke my heart to a million pieces

I think what really makes me sad after reading Klara and the Sun is when Manager, at the end, says Rosa didn’t have a great outcome with her family because then Klara says, “Everyone in the house was very kind to me [ . . . ] It was the best home for me. And Josie was the best teenager.” And it saddens me because she truly believes that, but as the reader knowing what I know and seeing what I saw, it’s just not true. Chrissie could hardly look at her more than half the time and Josie loved Klara… when it was convenient for her. And of course the Housekeeper thought of Klara as not much more than a vacuum.

And I understand Josie was sick, she was just a teenager who didn’t know whether she would live or die, but it’s heartbreaking because even after Josie gets strong again Klara is kind of passively kicked out of Josie’s room and moves into the Utility Room (which I’m pretty sure is just an attic) and Josie prepares for college, invites friends to sleep over, and moves on from Klara like she’s a toy Josie grew out of.

Klara definitely had it better than other AFs like Rosa and the boy AF she saw across the street from the store, but she didn’t really have it good, either. Chrissie defended Klara against Mr Capaldi that she should have her ‘slow fade’ but then she ended up fading on her own in a scrap yard. She doesn’t even get to fade amongst family, just tossed away like a malfunctioning microwave. And it’s so fucking sad because Klara was loved, but not like a human family member would ever have been, and it’s sadder because Klara believed she was in the best home only because she never knew better.

[amethysworld]

Recent notes on my commonplace book

[amethysworld]

2 things I love: cooking and journaling

[amethysworld]

Studying

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Night journaling sessions

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Journaling in a B5 notebook

[amethysworld]

its official: tumblr is selling our data to Midjourney

we'd been hearing rumors about this for a bit but now its open and out there. some details from this article

it goes without saying, but if @staff goes through with this its going to be an utter shitshow and im all but certain the website will not survive it.

[amethysworld]

Didn't like some pages of my art journal so I covered it with some collage

[amethysworld]

I was recently diagnosed with ✨bipolar disorder✨ and I was shocked because it's not what I expected. I was afraid of taking the medication but when I did things change - like I can actually focus, there's less noise in my head, I don't need coffee anymore just so I can complete my schoolworks, I don't struggle getting out of bed anymore, and it's generally much more peaceful. It's like my brain stopped having tantrums when there's a task I need to accomplish and I wish everyone who needs medication the same thing.

[amethysworld]

James Baldwin.

[amethysworld]

It's an extreme turn off for me when guys (fictional or not) thinks or acts like they are genuInelY domInanT, suaVe, viOlenT and all those usual toxic masculine tropes like yuck eww get that out of my face 🤢

off that last reblog: as far as fictional men are concerned, nothing turns me off* more than if the man in question is unironically portrayed as suave and sexy and dominant. i don't care how nice or attractive he is, i will dislike him immediately. he is going in the bin. the only thing that can save him from the bin is if he's initially portrayed as suave and sexy and dominant and then turns out to be kind of cringe, but it's crucial that the narrative acknowledges that he's kind of cringe, and bonus points if he turns out to actually be way more likeable when he drops the weird fake-sexy persona and is just, like, Some Guy. i'm explaining this badly but you get it

*rhetorically speaking

[amethysworld]

Was going to reply but my answer was too long

Academics definitely stresses me out, being a perfectionist and all - and the thing that helped is having a life outside of academics.

Hobbies made me remember that my life isn't confined to whether I had high grades or not, and over time I also incorporated bullet journaling in my life - which helped me plan and organize my tasks everyday. This not only includes planning for academic deadlines but also setting time for self care, hobbies, watching films, doing chores, spending time with loved ones and so on.

I think this helped me have a broader life view which made me realize that while academics is still a priority in my life, it does not determine my value as a person.

There are also times wherein I was so burned out and fatigued that my main goal was just to survive the semester, and even if I wasn't so satisfied with my grades sometimes, I remind myself that I'm barely hanging on - that I should be proud that I got through it at all. I give myself a pat on the back for the effort I made, and then take a much needed rest so that I'll have the energy to fight another day.

i want to make a post on coping with academic disappointment / moving past a bad grade / letting go of grade-based perfectionism. i'll definitely be drawing on my own experiences but would love input from others - anyone have advice they'd like to share? (can be anonymous or i can link your blog in the eventual post, whichever you prefer)

– archaic ♡

[amethysworld]

I like calm men. Men who don’t shout or break things when they’re mad. Men who tell you exactly how they feel. Men who communicate. Men who talk you in a gentle, low voice telling you what made them mad or what you did wrong, but never blame you and make you feel bad about it.

[amethysworld]

Moments captured in pictures

[amethysworld]

I spent my highschool just trying to survive through my depression and anxiety and maybe some undiagnosed, underlying neurodivergency and now that I'm in college I'm better at managing myself and I'm doing better in my academics and I'm much more happier

I think that when we tell teenagers that their lives will be over if they don't have the most perfect possible trajectory through the education system, that this is, perhaps, if I may be bold, not good for them,

[amethysworld]

The official sad ghost club

[amethysworld]

PRACTICE URGE SURFING