boyish-writes

[boyish-writes]

I’m calling all y’all out

[boyish-writes]

Is He Following? (Part 2)

Let’s get into that good nitty gritty good shit

Welcome back to hell, gendered and genderless beings.

Part 2 of 4

The air was heavy as Robert looked to the phone a few feet from him.

Damien...he couldn’t lose Damien but, god, if he was going to die he didn’t want Damien to be hurt.

Joseph wasn’t in the room. He’d left him there with a phone and unlocked his chains. Robert didn’t have the energy to stand anymore, legs, arms, and most of the rest of him was black and blue.

“Fuck” Robert sighed a bit, reaching a hand to his face as his eyes filled with tears.

He knew he couldn’t call the police, he’d be the one in trouble then. He’d done some...favors for Joseph. He’d end up right in prison for life with that.

He fucked up his whole life like this. He’d never get to see Damien’s amazing smile again or the way his eyes widened when the other found something interesting. Robert pushed the tears off his cheeks, a loud growl leaving him.

This was his fault for ever getting caught up in Joseph’s traps, he should have left he and Joseph where they stood.

Ex lovers with no ties but that of a few friendly barbecues and glances from across the yard when cutting grass.

No, Robert had to know what the mischievous look in Jospehs eyes really meant. He had to follow and know what his plans were. He had to get himself into a mess. Everything drove by a man who didn’t know where his sanity stopped and the alcoholism began.

Then Robert changed, Damien changed him. He didn’t want to deal in those mischievous eyes and the gallons of blood on his hands.

He wanted to have a family again.

“God dammit!” Roberts hoarse voice rang through the concrete of the basement, the only thing following it being a sob. He’d tried so hard to redeem himself. All of it had been for Damien, for Lucien, for Val.

It had all been worthless work. Garbage thrown out the back window of the Hearse he’d jumped into the moment he decided to tangle himself with Joseph longer than he originally intended to. 

Roberts fingers hovered over the numbers he’d memorized. He never admitted to anyone he actually cared that much. He didn’t want to leave all of these words unspoken. He didn’t want to leave this world knowing Damien thought he hated him...

He pressed the call button, eyes filled with tears as the dial tone raised the lump in his throat. Every beep made his chest feel tight, not knowing what he’d do if Damien answered. It must be too late...Damien is usually asleep by now, His face buried in one of his many books.

“You have reached Bloodmarch Residence. If it is urgent then please contact my cell phone. If not, please leave a message after the tone and I will get back to you right away!” 

Robert couldn’t help the smile that came to his lips at the sound of his Victorian daydream. Even the way his voicemail was...It was so pure to him. Damien was some force Robert knew he should have never touched. 

He was brought back to the real world with a beep, a tone that washed his smile away as quickly as it came. He knew it was time.

“Hi, um...Damien?” Robert scolded himself for sounding so quiet and hurt, so not himself.

“I’m just calling to say...” His heart panged like he’d been kicked in the chest.

“To say I think we should cut things off...” Robert was silent, knowing Damien wouldn’t trust his words. 

“You’ve helped me work out what I needed to and now I’m skipping town like I usually do just to fall back into my old bullshit...You don’t need me hanging over your head... Tell the kid I love h-him” Roberts voice broke and he held the phone a little further from his face so it wouldn’t be as obvious that he was trying to pull himself together. 

“Don’t go looking for me...I love you, Honey...” Robert hung up and a primal scream escaped his throat before he threw the phone across the room, watching its screen shatter into a million pieces against the concrete. He couldn’t help that stupid emotional part of himself from thinking that maybe the phone was some kind of metaphor for himself. 

“What a show!” Josephs voice filled the void that was the concrete cell he was trapped in.

“Now lets see what we can do with you...”

[boyish-writes]

Old Times

Jotaro is just my son whom I love so very much so take some soft angsty Jotaro.

Jotaro woke up to the loud sound of his alarm clock. That sickeningly loud Radio song that must play every morning in this town.

Morioh was much too cheery for him, he was used to sitting by the ocean or in the privacy of his own office and home. 

This was too much, it was so bright and loud but simultaneously so dull and quiet. It was new and that almost scared him.

He reached a hand over to slam on his alarm clock, staring at the brightly painted ceiling. It practically hurt his eyes to look at.

A frown found its way to his lips, as it does every morning. It had been a while since Jotaro was able to smile and really mean it. He didn’t smile a lot, maybe on special occasions, but he hadn’t had one of those in a long time.

He sat up, legs swinging over the side of the bed. As his feet hit the floor, a grounded feeling washed through him. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes.

“Jotaro!�� 

The mans eyes shot back open and his breath hitched. He hated to close his eyes. It made him think. Hearing the voice of friends...more than friends.

He missed Kakyoin… More than he’d missed anyone ever before. He never really knew his father but he did know he’d never missed the sight of him in this way. He missed kakyoins cherry red hair and the gentle smile he gave. How coy and kind he was, how worried he got for his friends...

Jotaro wasn’t sure when it had happened but his eyes welled with tears as he sat, staring at the bright Morioh floor.

Kakyoin would have liked it here...

He covered his face with his hands and sat there, his hands pooling salty tears as he tried to calm his mind from thinking of all the moments he shared with Kakyoin. The moments he shared with all of them...

Kakyoin and Avdol, that stupid little dog he grew to love as well. He’d never get to tell them he cared... It was much too late for that now.

His own grandfather probably wouldn’t even remember if he told him that he cared now... 

He’d lost his chance. 

A knock at his door startled him to alertness, one hand quickly wiping his eyes and his stoic expression back as quickly as it left. He stepped to the door and flung it open only to see Josuke standing there, hands in his pockets and head down a bit.

“Mom said you told her this is where you’d be” Josuke then proceeded to begin blabbing, Koichi just behind him. He couldn’t help but think for a moment that maybe he hadn’t lost everything...

He could make sure these people knew he cared. 

“Lets get going! Okuyasu is waiting for us!” Josuke said and started to almost drag Jotaro from his room.

He had a second chance and, god dammit, he was going to take it.

[boyish-writes]

Writers when they uploaded their chapter two whole minutes ago and haven't gotten any validating comments yet

[boyish-writes]

Shouldn't you?

[boyish-writes]

I appreciate the homophobic violence trigger warning that’s going around about It chapter 2 but I think it’s important that people know it also features a very intense scene of a man gaslighting and then violently beating his wife and I know that was very hard for me to watch so add it to the list if you’re thinking about seeing this movie and stay safe kids

[boyish-writes]

What if instead of editing – and hear me out on this one – I lay facedown on the floor and do nothing

[boyish-writes]

Gone

A slightly different take on what happened after the apocalypse ended 👀

Spoilers obv

Aziraphale felt his eyes begin to well with tears, standing tall and proud.

He didn’t feel that way... He felt weak and helpless, he wanted Crowley beside him for this.

“Aziraphale, Guardian of the west gate of eden, and-“ Aziraphale closed his eyes, bracing for the impact of the next word. It was something he’d known he’d hear the moment his heart yearned for the demon he kept by his side.

“Traitor”

Aziraphale did all he could not to sob. He didn’t want to fall...dear lord, he truly didn’t want to fall.

He loved his wings even if they were so bright they hurt his eyes, the bright white gave him purpose...

He’d miss the clean smell of home office, like a crisp lemon had been thrown in with a load of laundry.

“You have been convicted of fraternizing with the demon Crowley as well as making many choices that ended up closer to the work of a demon rather than an angel” Aziraphale softly gulped, that sound the only thing going through his ears.

Well, that and the words.

This was because of Crowley...

But that’s not how Aziraphale could think of it. He didn’t care if it was because of Crowley, he loved Crowley whether he told the other or not.

If Aziraphale knew, it was enough to keep him happy.

Aziraphale would have died for Crowley, falling was...just what he was expecting.

He opened his watery eyes and was met by the cold, meaningless smile of Gabriel.

“Goodbye Aziraphale, No one will miss you”

Aziraphale felt his heart sink at the words. Of course no one would.

Aziraphale knew he was easily forgettable, it was a part of his personality.

Hell, for 6 millennia, Crowley and he had only tried to find each other once or twice. He always figured it was because Crowley just forgot about him. As much as the thought of having no true friend on the earth hurt him, he knew it was most likely to be true.

Or it’s at least what had been drilled into him by other angels for thousands of years.

“Anything else you’d like to say before your fall?” Aziraphale felt his eyes begin to water, his heart heavy.

A smile came to his lips, the smallest and most unnoticeable of smiles.

“I’m sorry” He whispered, closing his eyes. He knew he had more to say, he wasn’t sure what but he knew there was something else.

“Oh, that’s absolutely precious, someone hit the button” Gabriel’s voice became a fading thought when the hatch beneath him came open.

It was slow but so fast. His eyes forced themselves open as he watched a small hole of light go farther and farther away.

Darkness, Aziraphale was afraid of the dark...

His wings burst into the plain of existence and he saw the white framing his vision.

“Crowley” Aziraphale recalled a moment when the other had noticed him shifting awkwardly in the darkened main room of the bookstore.

His bookstore...what would happen to it?

“Crowley!” Aziraphale yelled into the darkness again, tears feeling like knives as they ran out of his eyes.

He missed Crowley. He wanted Crowley.

It started to sting at first. Nearly unnoticeable.

Then it burned, all at once with the feel of a million tiny bee stings.

The change wasn’t subtle, it was jarring and utterly terrifying.

The pearlecent white feathers of his wings plucked out one by one and were replaced with coal black.

“Crowley!” He screamed into the darkness, his body beginning to ball around himself as he writhed in pain.

He wanted Crowley, Crowley.

Crowley...

Then it all stopped, his body slamming to concrete quickly as he let out a heart breaking sob.

“Ah, we’ve got another crier, Hastur told us that lil angel of Crowley’s would be one” The voice filled his ears in the same way wasabi filled his mouth with fire.

Beelzebub.

“Come now, angel, You’re one of us now” Aziraphale rose his head slowly and was met by Beelzebub standing over him. He didn’t know what to say, the tears leaving his eyes burning as his wings spread behind him.

“Get up! You’re damn slow” Beelzebub began to get impatient as Aziraphale stumbles to his feet.

This is his life now, he can take it...he can do it.

If Crowley could, so could he.

—

Aziraphale let out a light whimper as he was pushed to the ground, head hitting the hard concrete.

“You’ll never figure this out, Angel”

He’d come to hate the little nickname. He supposed he wasn’t ‘bad’ enough for the other demons. They’d all killed and hurt and pillaged. Aziraphale barely even liked to see blood, let alone be the cause of bleeding.

“Sorry” He stood and softly fixed the tartan tie he refused to rid himself of.

“You’re so fuckin soft” A hard knock to his jaw caused his teeth to chitter. His eyes watered.

Was this what Crowley had to go through...?

Crowley!

Oh, he’d thought about his demon a million times a day since he’d been down here.

He understood why Crowley screamed at his plants...

“Listen, Angel, Beelzebub wants to put you down on earth to cause some demonic miracles on your own because, well, honestly, you’re a waste of time and space down here”

Aziraphale had heard enough times that he was a waste of space but it stung a little more than usual in that moment.

Maybe it was the realization that heaven nor hell knew what to do with him...

“So get out, no one needs you” Aziraphale didn’t have to be told twice, taking his leave quickly.

—

Aziraphale felt his heart rush with warmth for the first time in months when he saw his little bookshop. It was just as he’d left it. He stepped forward before he heard the loud sound of things being thrown.

“Crowley” his voice was nearly a whisper as he began to walk faster. He couldn’t get to him any faster.

Of course Crowley would be throwing things, he knew his demon better than anyone else. When you leave Crowley alone and confused for a long enough time, his temper gets worse and worse before he becomes destructive.

“Crowley” he needed it, to see him and to hear him and to smell him. All he knew anymore was the scent of sulfur.

He remembered Crowley always smelled like a freshly put out fire with a hint of lavender. Aziraphale was positive the lavender scent was only because he’d once told Crowley he liked the scent of those flowers.

“Crowley!” He threw the door open and saw a shambled demon in a pile of books on the floor, glasses shattered long ago and yellow eyes filled with tears. He was hugging an old tan, tartan scarf to his chest, one Aziraphale hadn’t worn since the winter.

“Angel?” Crowley’s voice was broken and quiet. He sounded different, hoarse and different. Crowley knew right off something was different with Aziraphale.

The tears in his eyes had a different sorrow. Sure, he knew his angel was a bit of a crybaby but this just seemed...different.

Not to mention something smelled different and it wasn’t like Aziraphale had changed his cologne.

It was...burnt, charred.

“You’re fallen...” Crowley’s words left him quicker than he could think about them. His angel had fallen...

His angel.

The heart wrenching sob that left Aziraphale in that moment made Crowley scramble to his feet and come over to the light haired man he hadn’t seen in nearly three months.

Three months, three horrible, wretched months.

“Angel-“ the word make Aziraphale cover his face, Crowley gently (for the first time in his life, he did something gently) putting his hands on Aziraphales arms. The other cowered, not used to the gentle feeling coming from someone else.

In Heaven, no one touched you. You were left alone, nearly always utterly alone.

In Hell, someone was always touching you. People were always too close for comfort. They were close enough to hit and push and punch and...

“Hey, Hey, it’s alright” Crowley felt like his heart had shattered at the site of his angel like this. He could have killed from the anger that was building in his heart.

“C-Crowley, it’s was s-so absolutely horrid!” Aziraphales tired, broken voice caused Crowley’s chest to ache.

“T-They hit me and t-they-“ Crowley cut the other off before Aziraphale could say anything else, lankey hands running through Aziraphales curls.

“I know, Angel, I know” He whispered, his grudge against his own race only growing as the other spoke.

“C-Crowley, I thought a-about you everyday and I-I never thought I-I’d see you again” Aziraphale took a moment before throwing his arms around Crowley, face burying deep in the demons shoulder. Well...Perhaps they were both the demon now...

“I thought about you too, Angel...” Crowley squeezed the other, wanting him to be as close as possible. Aziraphale was skinnier, almost like he’d nearly been starved. Crowley knew what it was like your first few months in hell, especially for someone of a higher rank.

It was just what it was called, hell. Eighth ring of hell to be precise, the worst it could get.

“C-Crowley...” Aziraphale sniffled and Crowley’s attention moved from his own thought to the angel in grey that stood in front of him. He hadn’t even bothered to pay attention to Aziraphales change of outfit.

“Yes, Angel?” Crowley was gentle when he ran his fingers through Aziraphales curls once more. He didn’t know how else to soothe the angel in his arms.

“I-I’ve needed to say this for some time” Aziraphale wouldn’t move his head from the place it found to hide in Crowley’s shoulder.

“But I love you very dearly...a-and I didn’t know what I’d do w-without you” Aziraphale softly gripped the back of Crowley’s shirt, the tiniest of sobs leaving him as he began to cry.

Crowley’s heart was both so full and so broken. Aziraphale had fallen because of his love for a demon, because of his many mistakes due to Crowley’s mere existence around him...

But the one person he cared about so deeply, cared about him as well.

“I love you too, Angel... I won’t let anyone hurt you again” Crowley wasn’t expecting the other to do what he had. Aziraphale presses against him, pressing a kiss lightly to his lips.

Crowley never expected Aziraphale to even...think about doing that.

“I really...I truly do love you” Aziraphales words hung in the air, his voice had been shaky and scared. He figured if he was going to lose Crowley, it might as well be now and not later.

“I love you too...for all these fucking years, I’ve wanted nothing but for you to do that” Crowley quickly captured Aziraphales lips in another soft kiss, the two melting against each other like they were always meant to be together.

Aziraphale couldn’t help but realize that it didn’t matter whether he was Angel, Demon, or anything between.

He always had Crowley and Crowley always had him.

[boyish-writes]

Is He Following? (Part 1)

This little idea came while I was cosplaying and it’s here now.

It’s a little short but it’s just some set up.

Part one of four

“Hack”

“Wheeze”

“Tell me where you put it!” The shrill screech of the brooding blonde made Robert cringe into the concrete that surrounded him.

“No” Robert was very good at keeping himself together.

You didn’t just keep in all your emotions for years to not prepare for a situation like this.

“What if I hurt him, huh? Maybe that little son of his? Would you tell me then?”

Now that, that’s what scared Robert.

These empty threats of hurting the only people he’d grown to trust and love again.

The family he’d found and never wanted to let go of.

“I’m sure Damien wouldn’t want to know what you’ve been doing in your free time...would he?” Roberts heart beat began to race but he kept that cool exterior he tried so hard to always have. He was doing it for Damien...to keep him safe. For Lucien too, hoping one day they could all love some stupid fantasy life Robert knew he didn’t deserve.

Guess fantasy is a little too good to be true.

“You act like I haven’t already told him” He decided maybe he could trick him, make him think Damien already knew...It would hurt him less.

Damien didn’t need to know what he’d done for Joseph... the people he’d killed and the lives he’d ruined.

“I know you haven’t, Robert, don’t play me for a fool!” Joseph’s shrill voice reminded him of his daughter when she was young, having a hissy fit without being totally sure what it was about.

“I see the way that fucking emo looks at you! Like you’re the king of the god damn world when you’re really just the jester!” That hurt just enough for Robert to look away a moment. The Jester... Robert quickly composed himself, a moment of silence hitting him before he started to sniffle and cough up everything he could, spitting it directly onto Joseph shoes. It’s less than the bastard deserved.

The blonde let out a frustrated sound as his foot collided with Roberts side once more. Joseph then had to compose himself, fixing his hair and making sure he looked alright again. Vain as always, even when he’s bloodying up people he believed deserved it. Robert spat a bit of blood beside him, chest burning and eyes full of tears he refused to shed.

“I’ll give you two options, Small” Joseph bent down, squatting beside the coughing man he’d beaten to the point of tears. Robert didn’t have it in him to do anything at that minute, breathing as heavy as his heart.

“Tell him what you do or get rid of him” Joseph had a smirk that laced poison into his voice.

“And if you won’t-“ Joseph stood, foot crushing into Roberts hand as he moved to stable himself. He rotated his ankle, Roberts fingers making a horrid shatter against the concrete as a hoarse yell of pain left Roberts throat.

A smirk that made a sick feeling come over Robert settled itself on Joseph’s face. The face of a man who knew no sorrow or joy or pain. The face of the devil himself.

“I will”

[boyish-writes]

Make sure you know these things before seeing the movie!!!

It is an amazing movie and I loved it very much but Beverley’s scenes as well as the overwhelming amount of knocking triggered me kinda bad.

There is also a lot of motion in a scene where Mike shows Bill the original ritual of Chüd and it caused me to feel sick for a good portion of the movie.

Be safe when watching it babes but enjoy the amazing movie!

Reblog to save a life, and please retweet if you have Twitter.

[boyish-writes]

Fear

Kyoya makes me sad so welcome to sad Kyoya

This entire thing is based off of a quote from J. Michael Tatum where he said Kyoya equally loved Haruhi and Tamaki so he basically stepped entirely out of it so the two people he loved could be happy

J. Michael Tatum wants my heart dead.

Kyoya was sat alone in the Music room. He was always here while everyone else was working on their home life. This room held so many of his memories that he’d rather not leave. He thought...

“Only one more year” He muttered to himself. One more year until he would be alone in the world. Sure, he had Tamaki and Haruhi and all of the others now but...there was no saying for sure that they would stay.

So why not make his future more sure?

He looked at the book of photos, Tamaki looking just like the prince he did the act for. Kyoya knew Tamaki better than the others, he knew the prince act was just that.

An act.

Kyoya sighed and shut the small photobook, taking his glasses off in one swift movement.

Tamaki...

He loved Tamaki more than his own words could convey. He was sure there was never a day in the last few years that the blonde hadn’t crossed the path of his thoughts.

Without thinking, a light grumble left him. He was defeated, defeated by something as small as love...

But love wasn’t small. The way he felt for Tamaki wasn’t small, it consumed nearly all of his waking life. Whether he was with him or thinking about him...it became most of his day.

It was completely illogical.

This host club was founded with him and Tamaki, it started with them.

Kyoya couldn’t help but wonder if it would end with them...

“Oh! Kyoya, I didn’t realize you’d be here so late...” Tamaki stepped in, his uniform messy and his breath uneven. Run from home for the night, Kyoya knew how these nights went. Tamakis grandmother was too much for him many days and nights, he overcame it most days but some days it was too much. He had to get out.

“Ah, no worries, I was just leaving” Kyoya pushed his chair out quietly, taking a deep breath as he did.

“You know, I’d rather if you stay...” Tamaki stepped closer to him, a light little smile playing on his lips. Kyoya knew that meant the tall blonde wanted to sit here and have a make out session, maybe talk for a while.

Talk...

Kyoya didn’t want to talk to anyone right now.

“I’m sorry, Tamaki, but I’m a bit busy. Errands and such, I’ve never any time for dates” Kyoya stood and looked to his one love, his heart seeming to strain. Maybe...he did want to stay.

But Tamaki cared more about other people. It was obvious. He only over talked about Haruhi, no one else. Everything was about Haruhi...

Kyoya shuffled a few papers, feeling a wave of uncomfort come over him at the silence that followed his words.

“Kyoya...why have you been avoiding me?” The air grew thicker after his words, Kyoyas fingers stopping just shy of grabbing his bag from the chair in front of him.

“I’m afraid I don’t understand” Kyoya didn’t know when he began to spoke but the words flew from his mouth with a gentle force.

“I know that’s a lie, you’re the one person I’ve ever met that seemed to understand everything I’ve thought” Tamakis voice was...solemn. Like he’d lost something. Like he was desperate for anything to grasp onto.

“Why don’t you ask Haruhi why” Kyoya didn’t mean to come off so cold, he needed Tamaki to know how he felt but he had no clue truly how to say it.

“You’re jealous of...of Haruhi?” Tamki stood on the other side of the desk from Kyoya who refused to look up. Stacking papers and putting them into folders, making sure what he needed to be there was there.

Making sure he didn’t think too much about the situation.

“Kyoya Ootori, I am not letting you leave this room until we figure this out, now look at me” Tamaki didn’t raise his voice to Kyoya, knowing the other would gladly raise his own back. This time... this time it was too much for Kyoya not to feel his eyes begin to water. He silently cleared his throat.

“I don’t want to continue our relationship...you’ve found someone you love better and that loves you back just as well and I wouldn’t want to-“ His voice began to shake and he stopped, body rigid as he calmed himself.

Tamiki knew this would happen. Kyoya has always had a game he played, one where he was the confident heir that never made a mistake.

He wasn’t and Tamaki knew.

Kyoya was nervous and never thought of himself very highly with other people.

He knew of his social class, sure, but he also believed he could be replaced easily.

“I wouldn’t want to interfere with the life you two plan to lead, side by side” Kyoya finished his words, voice no longer stone cold but cracked, falling apart.

“Kyoya...” Tamaki stopped when he saw a tear drip to the pages of the stacks of paperwork Kyoya had shuffled through a million times now.

“I didn’t mean to make it seem like I loved anyone but you” Tamakis soft words only made Kyoyas heart ache more. Bringing a slender hand up to his mouth, he muffled a sound that was almost a sob.

“Kyoya, you are and will always be the man I care for the most” Tamaki took a step around the desk, Kyoya not moving. He couldn’t let himself cry here...

“I love you, Kyoya Ootori” Tamaki whispered with the gentlest smile as he allowed his hand to slide over Kyoyas cheek, tilting his head to look back up.

Tamaki saw the others face, tears streamed down his cheeks and a million words he wanted to say hiding behind his eyes.

“I promise, I’ll never leave you” Kyoya felt a sob wrack through him before Tamaki moved forward, holding the other tightly in his arms.

It didn’t take very long for Kyoya to build back up those emotional walls he held up, to stop himself from crying much anymore.

“I suppose...my fear was a bit irrational” Kyoya whispered, wiping his eyes and beginning to clean off his glasses with a cloth from his coat pocket.

“Very much so” Tamaki presses a gentle kiss to Kyoyas cheek, causing the black haired teen to give a little smile to his partner.

There was nothing to worry about...

Nothing at all.

[boyish-writes]

The lost and found

Okay, so I just saw IT chapter two and I have so many emotions and I thought this would be a good thing to write so enjoy.

Spoilers obviously y’all

The breeze was what made him remember.

The smell of the water and the woods and the asphalt.

He looked over the water of the Barons, taking a light breath.

Richie never wanted to come back here. He knew he never remembered but, that time of his life, it all...it all felt bad. If he tried to remember he got a migraine and it felt like he was disconnected from himself...

But now he remembered something he didn’t want to forget.

“Rich, you know you can tell me anything! I don’t understand why you wouldn’t tell me what Bowers said!” Eddies words boomed through his head, Richie angry and fuming as he stood a few feet away from the smaller boy. They couldn’t have been too old. Maybe before the big fight they had with this clown thing the first time.

“It’s because I’m a faggot, okay?!” Richie screamed out, eyes beginning to water as he looked at the only friend he ever felt so strongly for, the only person he wasn’t worried about telling everything...

Except for what he couldn’t admit to himself.

“I’m a fag and I’m a fairy and no one cares enough about me to stay around if they know” Richie didn’t realize he’d started crying, his loud voice breaking as he tried to stand his ground.

“I’m something no one wants to be around or touch because they’ll catch this like it’s a disease or I’ll come onto them because I’m a shit person and no one will ever want to be in my life ever again” Richie broke then, pulling his glasses off and throwing them to the ground when a hand reached into his hair, pulling just enough to help him know he could still feel.

Now he lost his best friend and he’d lose the rest of them too. He wouldn’t have anyone to cling to anymore. He’d truly be alone-

His thoughts stopped when he felt small arms around his body, hugging him close. Richie wasn’t sure he could stop himself from crying anymore while the other gently held him there, breaking into pieces in the smaller boys arms. Richie hadn’t cried like this in a long time. He wasn’t sure he’d ever cried with someone there to tell him things would be okay.

“Richie...I wouldn’t be hugging you if you had some stupid fucking disease” Eddies words caused a choked laugh to escape Richie’s throat, his heart beating faster. Sure, now Eddie knew he was gay but he didn’t know how he figured it out.

Richie figured out he was gay one of those very familiar times in the clubhouse, he and Eddie arguing over something dumb.

He realized it when he watched Eddie, angry and fuming about something he’d said, and saw the passion in his eyes. When he’d zoned out just looking at him and saw the passion turn to concern and care.

When he realized how much Eddie actually cared about him was the moment he fell so deeply in love that he wasn’t sure what else to do with himself.

His life was Eddie. Is Eddie okay? Is Eddie hanging out with us today? Where’s Eddie?

“And even If it’s a disease then I guess I’ve got it too, then” Richie glanced over to look at the blurry boy who hugged him, face hidden just enough in Richie’s shoulder that he couldn’t tell what emption the other felt.

“S-Seriously?” Richie sniffled, wiping his nose and pulling away just enough to see Eddies face. The smaller had tear streaks down his face along with the smallest of nervous smiles.

“Yeah...I figured you or the others would be mad at me” Eddie looked up to Richie only to see a look of pure relief in his eyes. So, Richie wasn’t the only gay kid in Derry.

“I don’t think I could have ever been mad at you for that, Ed’s...Even if I wasn’t-“ Richie hesitated, it was still hard to admit. He didn’t like having to admit it. He wanted to live his life free of having to call himself that knowing people everywhere would judge him.

“If you weren’t gay?” Eddie came out and said it easily, a little bit of his happiness and poppy attitude back.

“Yeah...so we’re just a couple of fags then?” Richie joked and Eddie smiled that big stupid smile. Richie could barely see it without his glasses but knew that’s what he did.

“I prefer Fairy”

Richie stood there, playing with the token in his fingers when he felt a hand on his shoulder, jumping with a light scream.

“Jesus fucking Christ, dude! I could have fucking killed you!” Richie said loudly when the site of Eddies familiar eyes met his. They had this look of...recognition.

Richie hadn’t been the only one to remember that moment with Eddie... Eddie had too.

“You know, when we were kids, I always thought you were cute” Eddies voice was quiet, a smile over his features that made Richie’s heart melt.

“Yeah, I-uh...I did too” Richie didn’t know how to joke with a situation like this. Sure, it had always been his way to cope with things but... his mind was blank.

He couldn’t just tell Eddie that he found him cuter now than he ever did when they were kids.

“I always followed your stand up, thought for a while maybe you’d mention all of us here in Derry...then I realized you weren’t very funny” Eddie smiled as he looked toward the black hair boy standing a few feet away.

The way Richie was looking at him, the longing need to say something that he couldn’t form the words to...

“Rich, are you okay?” Eddie took a step forward and Richie took a step back, a lump beginning to form in his throat.

“Richie, I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings or anything-“

“I love you, Eddie!” Richie felt his eyes start to water, shaking a little bit and feeling the very familiar Anxiety vomit start to come up.

“I always did and I always have and I haven’t stopped” Richie knew his voice was shaking as he watched Eddies wide eyes only get wider.

“Richie...I always thought I was pretty fucking obvious” Eddie felt the smallest smile come to his lips when Richie smiled too. His goofy, dumb smile.

“Then fucking kiss me, you bitch” Richie muttered and came at the smaller, taking his face in his hands and kissing him until he couldn’t breathe anymore.

But that was fine to him. Eddie was here and in his arms and he was kissing him. Eddie was just how he’d always hoped he was, soft lips that tasted a little bit like cough syrup.

When they pulled away Eddie almost let out a sob, tears welled in his eyes as the two embraced each other right.

“Now, you just have to tell the whale at home” Eddie let out a string of laughs into Richie’s chest which only caused Richie to begin laughing as well. The two standing there beside the barons, like they were kids again only this time...they were together.

—

“No, no, he��s hurt we just need to get him out of here”

Their lives, they were going to spend the rest of their lives together, he couldn’t leave him.

“Honey, Honey, he’s dead”

Richie’s eyes moved to Bev and then back to Eddie.

No, no, no, god, he can’t be.

He could see their lives now with a stupid little house and a dog and a cat, a cabinet full of pills Eddie didn’t really need but they were there to keep him sane. Richie finally writing his own content and doing shows so much less than he did now so he could spend time with Eddie.

He needed him.

He didn’t process a thing that happened next, he just screamed and yelled and cried. Ben holding his arm tight as he tried to claw his way back.

Eddie. He needed him, he loved him.

“I love you!” He screamed out at some point, wanting to say it one time.

He thought about all the stupid times he could have kissed Eddie on the cheek on the way out of the house with a little ‘I love you’ to start his day off better than it had ever been in the last twenty seven years.

He thought about being able to hold him on the couch while they watched some scary movie Richie would insist on and laughing a little ‘I love you’ to the terrified blob of kaspbrak beside him.

Just one more time before he was gone.

“I love you” Richie dropped to the concrete outside of Neibolt and realized he needed to pull himself together.

But Eddie...

Richie could wait to cry and sob, maybe worse.

He couldn’t let the others know...

But Eddie wouldn’t have wanted him to be scared.

He quietly let himself sob openly in front of these people he trusted with his life. In front of the people he was always afraid to tell. In front of the only people he had left.

“I love you, Ed’s”

“I’m sorry”

[boyish-writes]

Loss

I’ve been playing a lot of Danganronpa recently and Ishimaru is my favorite character so birthed this.

Why?

How?

Why would he do this? Mondo wouldn’t hurt anyone, he couldn’t...

Another light sob left Takas lips and he put his palms to his eyes.

“He didn’t, he couldn’t have” Taka tried to whisper but didn’t really know how to control his own volume.

He could see Mondo behind his own eyelids. The bright smile Taka was sure had only been seen by him out of all of their classmates. Taka banged his hand on his head and another sob left him. His uniform was messy, barely thrown off of himself. He couldn’t be bothered. Every moment he spent in this school just reminded him of Mondo.

“Mondo” He sobbed out the name like a prayer, hoping and praying it would bring back the biker he loved.

They say you can’t fall in love quickly but Taka was sure of it from the moment the two spoke that they had a bond neither could break.

He just wasn’t sure what type of bond in the beginning.

It wasn’t until the two were sat in that sauna, alone and tired. When Taka looked over to see Mondo struggling to breath and stay sat up, a hard pang went through his chest. It may have been the heat stroke but he’d prefer to think it was love. Taka smacked his fist against his forehead once more, not wanting to relive that night again. It was once such a good memory...it was a good memory less than twenty four hours earlier.

The memory of Mondo looking over at him and the two locking weary eyes.

“You okay, bro?” Mondos words caused Taka to snap out of a tiny stupor. Taka let out a half hearted scoff, the tiniest smirk rising to his lips.

“Why...wouldn’t... I be? I’d never let a delinquent...like you...beat...me!” Takas words came out in bertween his breaths, the warmth of the sauna causing his heart rate to raise. He couldn’t take this anymore...but how could Mondo if the other had kept all of his clothes on?

Taka heard the other let out a shallow chuckle as he stood.

“You’re strong, bro...how about...we let this...go? Both of us can...get out at the same...time?” Mondos pants and shaky hands let Taka know the other was on the verge... he couldn’t just let someone else get hurt for the sake of winning, it was against his morals.

Mondo softly reached a hand out to the other and Taka stood, taking one soft step forward and falling into the other.

“Oh shit, bro, you okay?” Mondo held the other up as he panted, dizzy and tired. Taka wasn’t sure when it happened but it only took a few moments for him to look up at the other, the picture of concern painted across the bikers features. Taka was sure he was dreaming that moment, held by some big strong man with the softest look on his face...

That’s when he realized what their bond was meant to be. Strong togetherness, to be this close for as long as possible.

Taka continued to bang his head against his fists.

“Stop!” He sobbed out, trying to get his own brain to end the pain that passed through his heart.

His body wracked with sobs for hours that seemed like mere moments. It wasn’t until the horrid sound of Monokumas shrill voice did he knew what time it was.

Taka looked up to the monitor as it began to shut off, realizing he needed to do his duty as the Ultimate Moral Compass and get to the dining room on time for breakfast.

He started to stand but the light sound of his doorbell startled him enough for him to fall back down. His eyes darted toward the door and he hurriedly fixed himself up, although he still looked like more of a mess than usual.

Taka swung open the door and looked around before his eyes were drawn to the floor.

He froze in place as his eyes darted from letter to letter on the black fabric that laid folded in front of his feet.

Crazy Diamonds

Takas heart seemed to leap or stop, he couldn’t tell which. He snatched the heap of a jacket and pulled it close to his chest, the smell engulfing him like a warm blanket. Mondo...

A sob barely wracked itself through him, his heart feeling like it had shattered into a million pieces. He couldn’t see anyone today...

He had to stay here...with Mondos memory and scent and comfort...

For once, Kiyotaka was against his own morals, pulling the jacket around his shoulders and curling back into bed.

[boyish-writes]

Hero I never had

A soft little thing about Shinsou and Aizawa. Takes place sometime after the sports festival and Shinsou is s a d.

Shinsous foot hits the green grass outside of UA, one foot after another. Another loss...another lost chance at being a hero. He feels his eyes well up with tears as he kicks a tall patch of grass.

“God dammit!” His voice echoes through the empty courtyard and he stops, hands balled into fists as he stands, body tense as he stares to the ground. Never be a hero, he’d never be a hero. Sure, people like him now, but he still had the power of a villain. No one would ever say he didn’t.

“Kid” A deep voice caused him to turn around, not bothering to use his quirk but only seconds after he turned did his own quirk not even work.

“You did good out there” the man wearing black stepping toward him, causing his heart beat to raise. Eraserhead...his one true role model. They had such similar quirks, it’s why he thought he could be a hero...

But it seems the world didn’t need two of the same quirk.

“What do you want, old man?” Shinsou was saying it before he could think, just barely reeling back. He thought to use his quirk now so he could run but he couldn’t when he tried.

Of course...when Shouta Aizawa is walking toward you and you’re angry, chances are he’s erased your quirk.

“Old man is a little harsh, I’m not too old” He steps up to him and Shinsou just stands there. He doesn’t know what to say or where to go. His one role model...

“Midoriya told me you were strong and, from what I saw, he’s not wrong” Aizawa reaches a hand up to mess with his scarf, trying to do something with his hands.

Shinsou frowned a bit and crossed his arms, trying to keep up a facade of being some delinquent teenager.

“Who cares what Midoriya says?” He muttered and Aizawa frowned. Wrong thing to say.

“I do” the tone of the pro hero caused a chill to go up shinsous spine.

“And I would hope you would begin to care too when he just got you a chance for a mentor with a pro hero” Shinsou looked up at the other quickly.

What? That little dork somehow convinced Eraserhead, who was not only a pro but also Shinsous favorite person on the planet, to mentor him?

“I-I-“ Shinsou stopped in his tracks when Aizawa held a little card out between his fingers.

“I’m busy during school hours for obvious reasons, weekends are touchy because I’m sleeping” Aizawa waited for the completely frozen Shinsou to move and grab the card, his lips tilting up in a smirk.

“Almost like I used your own quirk on you, go ahead, take it” Shinsou was quick with his next movement, taking it like it may disappear if he waited any longer.

“Thank you, Aizawa-Sensei!” Without thinking, Shinsou was bent at the waste, Bowing to the older. Aizawa smiled a bit, hiding it by barely pulling his scarf up to his mouth before beginning to walk away.

“Text, done call” He muttered before walking back to the classrooms he’d begun in.

Shinsou stood, astounded as he stared at the number.

Aizawa...wanted to be his mentor...

“My...mentor” He whispered before a bright smile came to his face and tears to his eyes.

“Thank god for that little green haired idiot!” He laughed through his words as he began to run back toward his home.

—

“You look happy, Honey. I assume the kid was happy too?” Hizashis words made Aizawa chuckle.

“I don’t think I’ve seen a kid more excited. He didn’t think I could hear him but...” Aizawa flopped onto the couch and kicked off his shoes.

“I guess I’ve got a little extra work cut out for me to get him to be a pro”

[boyish-writes]

Pop

A little bit of my favorite gay boys for my favorite gay

Me.

I’m my own favorite gay

“Caesar-Chan!” The loud booming voice of the Joestar Caesar had come to befriend cause a sigh to escape him.

“What is it now, Joseph?” The blonde tilted his head, hair falling softly into his eyes.

“Lisa Lisa said we didn’t have any training to do today since we were able to channel Hamon well yesterday. So, I was thinking-“ the taller had a smirk on his face as he pulled a chair in front of Caesar, sitting in it backwards.

“We could go somewhere. I know you’d like to go somewhere with ladies that you can woo~” Joseph’s words caused Caesar to scoff. With Jojo around, the last thing he wanted to do was ‘woo ladies’ these days. His eyes were on the Joestar himself.

“I would much rather prefer to continue training but...if you insist” Caesar stood quietly, Joseph smiling brightly.

“Yes! I finally get to talk to some woman that aren’t from America, I can’t wait!” Joseph was practically glowing as he started to lead Caesar who only following with a growing silence. He’d just have to watch Joseph grind and try to hook with women the whole night... He hung his head a bit.

He can deal for a night, it’s not like he expected to see another night out with Joseph anytime soon.

—

“Oh, nice” Joseph muttered as he sat at their table, looking over the women in dresses with their hair flowing over their shoulders. None had really approached Joseph although...Caesar had a swarm.

“Zeppeli boy, we haven’t seen you here in so long”

“You only get more handsome as time goes on”

“I have a room upstairs, I’d love to see you there”

Caesar brought a wine glass up to his lips and decided to play along.

“Now, my loves, there’s enough of me to go around” Caesar glanced over at Joseph he seemed to be losing that confidence he’d had earlier.

Caesar smirked as he stood, taking the hand of the brunette woman in front of him and pressing a light kiss to the back. She let out a dramatic gasp as her cheeks flushed.

“You’ll all get a chance to see me” Joseph stood without warning and grabbed Caesar by the wrist, the woman letting out small sounds of protest.

“Joseph-“ Caesar was caught off guard when the other pushed him against the brick of the outside of the building.

“My plan backfired” He muttered before grabbing the back of Caesars head, bring their lips together and closing his eyes tightly. Caesar was caught by surprise, starting to push him away but realizing the situation quickly. Joseph Joestar...was kissing him. He closed his eyes and leaned into it, fingers gripping the front of the others green shirt.

Silence blanketed the both of them when they pulled away, still close. They caught their breath to the sound of the wind and each other.

“I wanted to make you jealous...and I ended up making myself jealous because the woman here like you better than me” Joseph was the first to speak when Caesar looked up at him. He began to speak but Joseph interrupted.

“And now you’re going to say, ‘why would you do something so stupid, Jojo?’ “

“Why would you do something so stupid, Jojo?” Caesar lightly hit the others chest after registering what had happened, the original Joseph trick.

“I wanted to do something a bit less obvious than kiss you out of nowhere” Joseph let the smirk rise to his lips again as Caesar sighed.

“We need to go back...it’s late” His eyes went to the Joestars who were filled with a bit of mischief.

“How about you stay in my room tonight?” Joseph’s eyebrows wiggled and Caesar couldn’t help but roll his eyes, slipping out of Joseph’s arms.

“Absolutely not”

[boyish-writes]

Discontent

This is another post for the same friend who wanted the Todoiideku! Some Tamaki and Kyoya shit for you all!

“You know, Kyoya is never late...” Hikaru tilted his head softly as Kauru is leaned on his shoulder.

“I wonder what could have kept him so occupied” The twins hummed a bit as they watched Tamaki pace from one side of the room to the other.

“I called him nearly thirty times now! He hasn’t answered any of them, as if he’d ever...but! He must be in danger!” Tamaki stops and puts his hands on his hips, looking into the distance. A slight frown falls onto Haruhis lips.

“I don’t think he’s in danger, senpai... there was an accident at one of the hospitals his parents own, he’s probably helping them-“ Haruhis words were cut off, as usual, by another host bursting through the door. It just so happened to be the host they’d been waiting for.

“Kyoya! My love, you’ve arrived!” Tamaki pranced over, smiling brightly. It only took one quick glare from Kyoya over the top of his wire frames for Tamaki to let out a soft chuckle and skip in a different direction.

“I must be needed elsewhere!” Tamaki movies to hide behind Haruhi and looks over their shoulder.

“Haruhi, Kyoya is being scary, protect daddy” Haruhi sighed at the words from the man behind them.

“Kyoya-Senpai, are you all right?” Haruhi took a step forward only for the older to scoff.

“What could you do to help my matters, commoner?” Kyoyas voice was low and warning, like a nervous dog. It was practically a growl.

“Wow, bad mood” the twins didn’t seem to make his mood much better by pointing out how bad it was. He glared at the red heads before a bouncing little blond came over.

“Kyoya-Chan! Do you wanna play with Uusa-Chan! He’ll make you feel better!” Honey held up the pink rabbit and smiled sweetly at the taller man. It only took a few moments for him to silently take the stuffies and go to sit in one of the many couches.

“Kyoya, what’s wrong?” Mori stood over the tiny concerned figure of Honey and everyone began to circle around.

“Only family matters, I’m sure it will all blow over in a few days” Kyoyas tone was dismissing, pushing his glasses up from the middle of his wire frames. He had an aura that just said, drop it. So that’s what they did, Tamaki the only one continuing to try and talk to him.

“Kyoya, I know when something is wrong with you, we’ve know each for so long-“ Kyoya glared at the blonde when Tamaki began to ramble the moment they were alone.

“Tamaki, don’t you have something better to do? Perhaps annoying Haruhi or yelling at the twins?” Kyoya snarled a bit at the other and Tamaki went silent for the first time since Kyoya had came in. Tamaki has known the other was completely filled to the brim with anger and had been since he walked in, that was some of the only times Kyoya would snap like this. Well, unless he was tired.

“You know, you’re father doesn’t run your whole life, Kyoya” Tamaki knew what was wrong, of course it was something the others father had said, it always was. Kyoyas anger faultered for a moment.

“Ah, contrary to belief, I may as well have no free will. I am to be wedded off like some play toy and I’ll never live my own life...I know the same happens to you, why don’t you react the same way? Don’t you become enraged to know that you’re a pawn in your family’s game?!” Kyoyas voice got louder as his eyes brimmed with tears, practically seething before he noticed what he was doing. Kyoya hadn’t been able to get any anger out in the last little while, he didn’t like to scare his mother and school was the only other place he went.

“Kyoya, you know it makes me angry but...you promised me-“ Kyoya chuckled as his facade fell, his usually square shoulders scrunching together a bit as he takes his glasses off to clean them.

“I promised you we would leave together, yes...I remember” He looks to the blonde who barely smiles, lightly stepping toward him and tucking his hand under the glasses boys chin.

“Run away and see the world with me, my darling” Kyoya let a tiny smile appear on his lips and he chuckled, some of his anxiety flowing out as he looked to Tamaki. He reached his hand up, caressing the blondes cheek.

“Your charm doesn’t work on me, You know. I know you’d beg to leave with me if I would say no” Tamaki smiles when he catches the familiar tone Kyoya usually has. It took him by surprise when the dark haired boy kissed him quickly.

“The girls are coming in any moment now, go to your table” Kyoya smirks a bit “And wipe the grin off your face, you cant be looking like a love sick puppy. The girls will think you’re falling for them as well...and I can’t have that” Kyoya softly pushed his glasses up his nose before Tamaki hugged him quickly and ran off.

Maybe living at home for another few years won’t be too bad if he is able to have Tamaki by his side...

[boyish-writes]

Belonging

My friend wanted me to write some soft Todoiideku stuff because he complains about the lack of good Todoiideku. It’s kinda rushed but it’s my first thing I’ve wrote in a while. I hope you all like it 💖

Izukus eyes opened quietly and glanced to the drop cieling above him. What had happened in his dream? What woke him up so suddenly? Was it...bad? He closed his eyes another moment and remembered. Stain. Todoroki, Iida, the fire and ice and blood...the look in the hero killers eyes. So...it wasn’t a good dream but it wasn’t really a dream at all. Just a replay of the last twenty four hours.

The soft movement in the bed a few inches from him made him look up, his dark hair falling into his eyes a bit. He reached a hand up to wipe the sleep from his eyes and squinted to see the other.

"Todoroki?" Izuku whispered as the two toned boy started to stand from the hospital bed he sat in. Todoroki didn’t even bother to look at the other.

"Go back to sleep, you need your rest" Todorokis words were heavy with exhaustion as he got to his feet and walked over to the window. Izuku sat up, socks barely hitting the cold tiles of the hospital floor. He shivered when his sheet slipped from him, the paper thin material barely giving him any warmth in the first place.

"Why are you up?" He asked, legs swinging softly and dragging the cold floor, picking up dust bunnies on the way. He didn’t care much, the socks were dirty anyway.

"Couldn't sleep" The other student grumbled as he leaned his elbows on the windowsil. Izuku reached for the crutch that sat next to his night stand, standing and walking over with him.

"Didn't i tell you to go back to bed?" Todoroki muttered when he smaller boy stood next to him, eyes widening and mouth growing into a bright smile.

"The stars look so beautiful! You can practically see all of them!" Izuku exclaimed, a near giggle following his words that made Todorokis lips turn up into a smile.

"Yeah, I know. I've been here a few times. It's prettiest at night" The different colored eyes landed on the astounded broccoli-headed boy beside him. He couldn’t help but think how much he loved Izukus smile.

"The reason is the light pollution. The farther you are from the city lights, The better you can see the stars" Iidas words cut through the silence and Todoroki looked toward him. When did he wake up, he wondered.

"Why aren't you asleep?" Izuku hums softly, looking toward him quickly. Iida stood, walking over to the other two and looking out the window as well.

"Your talking awoke me" Iida looked over the stars and a smile came to his lips as well. He loved seeing the two content and happy, glad they relaxed over a day they had before this nightfall.

"The stars do look especially stunning tonight" Todorokis eyes wandered to Iida and he couldn't help a feeling of belonging washing over him. He felt...at home with them. It was an unusual feeling. It made his heart full and his eyes water. He felt safe with them.

"Shoto, are you alright? You've been staring for quite a while" The purple eyes of Iida finally registering as they stared back into his own. Izuku stood between the two taller boys, sensing the gentle concern coming from Iida.

"Y-Yeah, I-uh-" Todorokis sentence caught in his throat and he quickly looked away from Iida, the eye contact making all of his thoughts swirl. Anxiety flowed through him for a moment before he realized there was no reason for him to be anxious. They cared for him, they wouldn’t judge him for his feelings.

"I just...I-I'm glad I have you two" His words came out barely over a whisper. Izuku leaned up, pressing a soft kiss to his cheek.

"We're happy to have you too, Todoroki" He smiled sweetly at Todoroki whos eyes move from the shorter to the taller boy. Iida has the softest smile on his face, a barely pink tint across his cheek.

"I agree, I'm also joyed to have you around, Shoto" He looks down bashfully as he spoke. He was accepted...then why did he have this lump in his throat? This feeling that he couldn't shake. He let a smile come to his lips and his eyes watered a bit, turning his head quickly to look out the window again.

"Thank you..." Izuku stepped over, coming between Todoroki and the window and hugging him tightly. Iida came around the other side and softly leaned his head on his shoulder.

"You don't have to thank us for loving you, Shoto" Iida let out a tiny chuckle and Iida tried to chuckle back but it came out closer to a sob.

"We're never going anywhere, Sho" Izukus muffled words only caused more tears to flow from Todoroki and they stood and let him cry for a while. With the last few sniffles, Iida looked them over, his blush returning to his cheeks.

"We could all sleep on my bed if-"

"Yes"

"Yes"

The two boys looked up to the madly blushing Iida and smiled. Todoroki leaned up and pressed a kiss to his nose.

"You think either of us would deny sleeping next to you?" Iida was sure he could have died right then, Izuku blushing just as brightly behind Todoroki.

"Let's go to bed"