chococococya - Tumblr blog

[chococococya]

This is more punk than the whole of punk history.

[chococococya]

[chococococya]

Resident Evil 4 Remake (2023) Leon S. Kennedy [ 1 / ??? ]

[chococococya]

Even if I didn’t have a solid plan, in the back of my head, I always assumed I’d kill myself.

Now I’m an adult and people my age have their lives in order and I’m stuck here, confused, because I never planned to be alive and I’m so far behind.

I feel like I’ll never catch up.

[chococococya]

I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD BOB ROSS IS A GIFTED GOD I DREW ALONG TO HIS VIDEO IN MS PAINT AND

HOW

THE

FUCK

THIS MADE ME SO HAPPY I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW PLEASE I ADVISE YOU GUYS TO DRAW ALONG WITH BOB ROSS IN MS PAINT IT IS AN EXPERIENCE I AM SO CONFUSED BUT PLEASED FUCKING DO IT

[chococococya]

i’m gay but i’m always gonna choose the well developed straight ship over the 2 bland and incompatible white dudes that have 500,000 fanfics written about them. you guys just hate women.

[chococococya]

made this while watching ep 1 of dunmeshi

[chococococya]

I feel like Shen Jiu's weird self-contradictions are underrated, so I'm gonna list the ones I remember, cause I think they give some insight into his character.

The most notable one, imo, is this scene from Airplane's extra, where Shang Qinghua tries to warn SJ about Liu Qingge's future death:

SQH's dialogue here is upfront that SJ will try to save LQG from his qi deviation, not kill him. Failing to save LQG will also make SJ "abandon himself to despair".

(more ramblings and screenshots under the cut…)

Yet, despite the fact that SQH is SJ's author and knows what his character will do, SJ's reaction is to balk at the idea of ever saving someone from a qi deviation. SJ doesn't even know that SQH is talking about LQG, his hated rival.

And still, even after SJ's dismissive tone, SQH urges SJ to remember the advice he gave him. It implies that SQH knows SJ is being dishonest about his own feelings (whether to SQH or to himself).

Going back in time, we also have this scene, which takes place after SJ rescues Yue Qi from Qiu Jianluo and ends up getting captured because of it:

You liar, Xiao Jiu! You little lying liar! "That single moment was all I've got in me for the rest of my life" my ass!

Later on, in SJ's extra, SJ is fully planning to rescue YQ from danger (or, at the very least, give him a proper burial). And this scene take place after YQ has already broken his promise and failed to rescue SJ:

After they've reunited, SJ also tries to protect Yue Qingyuan yet again, this time from Wu Yanzi. And he ends up stabbing his master in the back to save YQY's life. His words and his actions just don't match up!

As a third example, we have the scene with SJ and YQY in the Lingxi Caves. Since joining CQMS, we've seen SJ generally try to avoid YQY, behaving as if he dislikes his presence.

And yet, unlike at the annual spars, where YQY talks SJ's ear off with chatter while SJ hems and haws to avoid conversation, that dynamic is completely inverted here:

SJ is the one trying to engage YQY in conversation this time. He keeps trying to chat even after receiving the "cold shoulder". I thought you hated talking to him, SJ...?

(Unfortunately, SJ is trying to start a conversation about YQY's greatest trauma while YQY's hands literally shake with PTSD, but of course, SJ doesn't know that…)

For my final example...well, some might not count this as a contradiction, but I think it points to another notable difference between SJ's thoughts and his actions:

After their reunion, SJ thinks he would prefer a dead YQY to a living YQY who has left him behind to suffer.

But later, in the water prison scene, when YQY literally offers his life to SJ — giving SJ the opportunity to vent his resentment by dragging the sect leader down with him — SJ's reaction is instead to chase YQY away for his own safety:

SJ is given a final choice between a dead YQY, and a living YQY who leaves him behind to suffer, and...he chooses the latter, not the former.

The real common thread between both scenes, as I see it, is SJ's self-loathing and dehumanization. He thinks of himself as "vile and poisonous". He thinks he's "rotten from birth". He calls himself a "thing".

What I find consistent in this list of contradictions is that SJ underestimates himself. He underestimates his own humanity. He defines himself by his worst thoughts, impulses, and actions.

And his self-hatred, his insecurity, it only makes him lash out at others even more. He hurts others, and he hurts himself, and he uses his own hurt to hurt others.

His mind has twists and turns far more complex than that two-bit two-dimensional scum villain from Proud Immortal Demon Way.

And so, to conclude:

I'm interested to hear other people's thoughts as well!

[chococococya]

[chococococya]

your parents just sold you as their firstborn to a fey. problem is you’re already an adult.

[chococococya]

cackling at this, can NOT believe it's a real, actual quote. it reads so much like one of those clickhole pieces

[chococococya]

• Woman’s Dress and Petticoat (Robe à la française). Place of origin: Europe Date: ca. 1745 Costumes; principal attire (entire body) Silk plain weave (shot taffeta)

[chococococya]

[chococococya]

A tale in 4 parts

[chococococya]

Valentino - Fall 1989 RTW

[chococococya]

I like in Teen Titans that Robin’s mask is just as expressive as like cartoon spidey masks. Especially when they do this thing:

OR WHEN HE DOES THIS:

he’s so silly I love him lmao

[chococococya]

clark reupload

edit: forgot the sweater comic