chronicallyuniconic

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day 2.

day 1.

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aye, seizures unknown.

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day 1.

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i feel personally attacked

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tried a mooncup (for the first time) over the past couple weeks & my my do i have thoughts.

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what a dark day to be disabled in the UK

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im as smooth as a politician dodging a question

i booked a wax for tomorrow & genuinely cry when i see myself in the mirror at this whatever? It was never like this & i dont know if its pcos or my generally shit immune system

its a non issue too. looks dont matter and i shouldnt care. i just do. there are so many horrible things going on but this is my 'problem' its kind of pathetic

at least tomorrow will be a different kind of ouchy.

aunt irma is also not helping one bit, my punishment for missing a pill unintentionally, i thought it was a vitamin i dropped that went under the couch but no, silly goose

doctors on monday so i guess i can ask them, for somethjng, i dont even know, just something

also fuck Keppra.

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i booked a wax for tomorrow & genuinely cry when i see myself in the mirror at this whatever? It was never like this & i dont know if its pcos or my generally shit immune system

its a non issue too. looks dont matter and i shouldnt care. i just do. there are so many horrible things going on but this is my 'problem' its kind of pathetic

at least tomorrow will be a different kind of ouchy.

aunt irma is also not helping one bit, my punishment for missing a pill unintentionally, i thought it was a vitamin i dropped that went under the couch but no, silly goose

doctors on monday so i guess i can ask them, for somethjng, i dont even know, just something

also fuck Keppra.

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ive got more hospital letters than any greetings cards

ive had so many, that i know from the feel of the envelope before i even see my name on it😆😆

this life.

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my hips hurt like period pain (again)

i think my knees might give up & i am tired asf

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fucking hell it went from bad to worse

being disabled is a burden & inconceivable to non disabled

how about go fuck yourself Jan.

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dad can barely be arsed to send a message these days, wished a happy fathers day, to be told hes going abroad, again. rented this whole villa its going to be amazing he says.

my whole life hes told of having no money, scraping & scrimping by. as a child it was 'im paying your mum in child support' like i was at fault for his lack of money. in the past 5 years its all holidays, house renovation, more holidays. only he works.

then, as things do, words fall through the grapevine.

he and 2 sisters, received £800,000 in will money when their mother died, my grandmother. BUT. he has a third sister...one that's always been pushed aside, ignored, treated as lesser. we get on really well & she was even hesitant to say.

EIGHT HUNDRED THOUSAND POUNDS.

my aunt received £0 from that will money, from her own mother.

you know that man never given me or my brother anything. his own grandson he threw some money at & has seen twice. any hardship me or my brother has gone through, was met with 'that sucks' or 'youll be ok' i mean damn, i was being rinsed by a landlord & trying so hard to leave & asked for help. nothing.

so we stopped asking for help.

having his family, my step family, means more to him than his own children ever did. i also know his wife hates us, though wouldnt admit it. she looks at us with disdain & judges us through our mother. i have every reason to believe she's part of the reason we hardly communicate with dad. we're an inconvenience for her & her kids.

then im made to feel guilty for not making an effort.

Happy Father's Day.

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its friday, its raining against the window, im going to play minecraft

& the say F13th is unlucky

this is happy

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lol new seizure medication added. its sad and scary that some people with epilepsy are on the max doses and can still have seizures. Hopefully this will help🥹

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Earlier this year, a litter of 5 babies were born at St Louis zoo

They also brought cheetah back to Saudi Arabia after disappearing about 40 years ago or so.

I love all cats😆

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i straightened my hair so i could feel a bit better

my hair is straight but i dont feel better.

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