dumb-fuck27 - Tumblr blog

[dumb-fuck27]

What girlfriend? Dude you’re gay, I literally saw you with your boyfriend yesterday. Nah I refuse to believe that was your childhood friend. Dude you don’t have to pretty be straight, we’re fine with you the way you are.

REVERSE TROPE WRITING PROMPTS

Too many beds

Accidentally kidnapping a mafia boss

Really nice guy who hates only you

Academic rivals except it’s two teachers who compete to have the best class

Divorce of convenience

Too much communication

True hate’s kiss (only kissing your enemy can break a curse)

Dating your enemy’s sibling

Lovers to enemies

Hate at first sight

Love triangle where the two love interests get together instead

Fake amnesia

Soulmates who are fated to kill each other

Strangers to enemies

Instead of fake dating, everyone is convinced that you aren’t actually dating

Too hot to cuddle

Love interest CEO is a himbo/bimbo who runs their company into the ground

Nursing home au

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Why is everyone always shocked when Alfred turns out to be a bad ass?

Like who the fuck else did you expect to raise Bruce Wane after his parents were shot?

All of the fighting style that bat man uses was taught to him by Alfred, I thought that was common knowledge.

[dumb-fuck27]

“You must be fun at parties”

I am actually but then again the parties I go to involve college professors, other philosophers, musicians, and music producers so I don’t have to deal with completely dumb ass sentences like the one that came out of your mouth.

“Oh look at Mr. Fancy pants over here”

Never said they were “fancy”, the parties are with in the price range of an average college students budget. just mentioned there are not any leptons there.

[dumb-fuck27]

I don’t know why people don’t understand the difference between weaponized incompetence and just incompetence.

There is a big difference in those two.

It’s like your dominant hand versus your non dominant hand.

Your dominant hand knows how to write backwards and forwards, different fonts, and phrases but refuses to.

Your less dominant hand doesn’t know how to properly hold a fucking pencil.

With weaponized incompetence, they know why you’re mad, confused, and the reason why you’re yelling at them.

With incompetence, they are just as confused as you are mad and will actually loose sleep trying to figure out what they did wrong so they don’t upset you like that again.

So before you lash out take a minute to think about what is happening in their head and if the answer to what’s happening in their head is “nothing” it’s probably just incompetence

[dumb-fuck27]

Oh my god! Every time I see a raccoon out in public, I have to actually restrain myself from scooping it up and taking it home with me. God I just love them so much.

Like

Look… look at his grabbers

Take one long look and his thieving eyes and tiny stealers and tell me you wouldn’t take him away to live a better life with you

The things I would do to help him steal a valuable gem from the English museum and sell it for snacks.

[dumb-fuck27]

God damn it. Autism is a fucking curse from the god of plagues and the god of trickery.

I work in an inclosed space with neurotypical people and me being the autistic retard I am don’t pick up on emotions very well so to help with this I decided to mark down the time periods of when people tend to be less tolerant of certain things and situations.

You know normal shit like holiday weeks, unwanted yet needed doctor appointments, whenever the in-laws are visiting, that kind of shit.

I would buy things for my coworkers that they liked and that could make them happier around those times.

I very easily pick up on these times of the year… like, too easily because I started noticing that some of my coworkers had repeating weeks that they were easily annoyed. So like the good person I thought I was being, I mark those down as well and pick up items they would like at that time.

Now to explain what my thought processes was before I get really into it. Autism allows you to view people as individuals instead of anything like race, sex, religion. You see people for who they are and not what they identify themselves with.

What I failed to understand is these individuals that had the repeating irritable weeks were women and I was actually marking down the week that their bodies get rid of unnecessary *things* every month.

Yeah, I inadvertently planed out when they were on their period and got them tea and chocolates to make them feel better in that week like the dumb ass I am.

This was only brought to my attention when one of them watched as I marked the week down in my phone with their name on it and asked me about it.

You know on one hand, it made them feel better throughout that week of uncomfortably… but one the other, it’s an INSANE breach of privacy and oh my god I feel so bad about it.

TLDR: I had an unknown period planer.

[dumb-fuck27]

Me: “yo I found this really cool place we should hand out at sometime

Friend: “that would fun let’s do it”

*at the location*

Me: look how beautiful this is

Friend: “it is beautiful… btw I have something I want to tell you”

Me: “oh what is it?”

Gf: “I love you”

Me: “son of a BITCH”

Gf: “what’s wrong”

Me: “god damn it, the whole reason why I brought you here was to say the same shit but you had to beat me to it. God, first it’s my video games, after that it’s sports competitions, and now this. You just can’t let me win once huh”

Gf: “someone’s got to wear the pants”

[dumb-fuck27]

“Did it hurt when you fell from heaven” unoriginal, over used, boring

“Was is tough climbing out from the pits of hell” bad ass, inspiring, makes you seem like a force to be reckoned with

[dumb-fuck27]

As far as I know, the human body should not exist the way it does. Every creature that stands on two legs at all times has knees that bend opposite to ours.

The only way mechanics have made robots that have two forward bending knees balance properly is adding a counter weight on the back.

Our knees bending the way they do is also the reason why humans start noticing back and knee problems in their 30s. Not taking into account the excess weight that most people have after their mid 20s.

[dumb-fuck27]

I like moths better than butterflies, not because of some weird edgy reason like “I am like the moon light” or whatever they say but because I would rather see this at night

Than this in the day

“But butterflies are beautiful” they are only “beautiful because of their colorful wings. If they had leathery demon bat wings we would be killing them any time we could

[dumb-fuck27]

I just saw a gun store advertisement that genuinely made me want to buy a gun from them.

It was just the stereotypical shitty bearded white guy water an AR hanging off him while he stands in the “assert dominance” pose and said “there are two wolves inside you, one like the modern pew pew… the other likes millers surplus… both are autistic” which is the most accurate thing I’ve heard thus far.

[dumb-fuck27]

I’m the person who revolves around facts and one that pisses me off is that B.O. is a tell sign of family relations. If the body oder smells bad you have some sort of relation with them, if not then you don’t have a relation to them.

This means that deodorant is the reason why a lot of us are single but not wearing any fucks us over more than it helps.

As much as I wish the commutative thought process would reflect this fact so we would stop having inbred kids, this sadly won’t happen… at least in any of our life times.

[dumb-fuck27]

If I ever get really big in the game development industry, I’m putting my foot down and demanding that the company I work with sell games at $60 maximum.

[dumb-fuck27]

Found out my doctor watches my streams only because he said that my 110 bpm was normal for me.

[dumb-fuck27]

How the fuck are the comment sections on porn hub a safer community than discord.

There’s a mother fucker verified as Bob Ross giving life advice in those comments and is doing him a service

I tip my hat to you porn hub user Bob_Ross

[dumb-fuck27]

I want to start this off by saying I am in no means an archaeologist nor have I gone to school for it. I have the most basic knowledge of archaeology and how they work. That being said…

In the next thousands years or so when they eventually dig up our remains it is going to be an exactly like what it is now other than the research of the person.

They are not going to dig up a trans person and not know about transgenderism.

What’s most likely going to happen is they’ll find your remains, take note of what you’re wearing (men are usually buried in suits with minimal jewelry while women are buried in dresses/gowns with excessive jewelry), take notice of the size of your jaw, rib cage, and hips, read whatever you have written with you, and scour the internet for your pictures, post, and social media’s so they can put you in a museum and talk about you.

Not only will they know you’re transgender but they’ll probably find your search history and all the hentai/furry porn you were into, all of the cringe stuff you were addicted to as an adult, and every thing you stood against. Whether or not you had a criminal background or if you were a straight A student.

They’ll have pictures of you at you exhibit as well as documentation of who you were.

The only thing you should be worried about is if you’ll be able to whiteness everyone’s dissatisfaction while at your exhibit is some sort of after life

[dumb-fuck27]

Does estrogen stack? Is it damage over time?