firehelpmeforget

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Peace

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Truly drives me feral that "real or not real" involves Peeta verifying facts from before he was hijacked. And then the books end on "you love me, real or not real" because both he and Katniss now know it's a fact of life that Katniss loved him all this time.

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My mother gives me a cup of chamomile tea with a dose of sleep syrup, and my eyelids begin to droop immediately. She wraps my bad foot, and Peeta volunteers to get me to bed. I start out by leaning on his shoulder, but I'm so wobbly he just scoops me up and carries me upstairs. He tucks me in and says good night but I catch his hand and hold him there. [...] “Don't go yet. Not until I fall asleep,” I say.

body pose reference: mellon_soup on tiktok

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SO IMPOSSIBLY GOOD

Sweetest @rosegardeninwinter requested “any canon Everlark moment I haven't drawn yet but want to” by my Buy Me a Coffee Cheese Bun and no, that’s not what I planned to draw. Obviously, I love this moment (who doesn’t?) but I started with another one. But it just… didn’t work. I try again and again, changed poses and angles, deleted everything and started again but then I just gave up. I’ve spent a couple of hours on what supposed to be quick sketch and was close to stop drawing at all lol. I felt like my hands forget how to draw and everything was just terrible and I felt miserable and stupid. And then I just understood that I couldn’t do anything. I don’t know how to handle everything. It’s just too much.

So I gave myself a little time to cry and then started this one. This moment I think is one of my favorite. It truly must be impossibly good to find a such needed comfort in loving arms when it’s too much to hold on anymore. Also Peeta’s lips on Katniss’s neck is my weakness, yeah.

When Peeta holds out his arms, I walk straight into them. It's the first time since they announced the Quarter Quell that he's offered me any sort of affection. He's been more like a very demanding trainer, always pushing, always insisting Haymitch and I run faster, eat more, know our enemy better. Lover? Forget about that. He abandoned any pretense of even being my friend. I wrap my arms tightly around his neck before he can order me to do push-ups or something. Instead he pulls me in close and buries his face in my hair. Warmth radiates from the spot where his lips just touch my neck, slowly spreading through the rest of me. It feels so good, so impossibly good, that I know I will not be the first to let go. / CF, ch.14

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Never drawn Katniss in the first games before somehow

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Girl put your airpods back in

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WIP Wednesday

Tagged by @firehelpmeforget :)

A loud crack of thunder distracted Peeta from his work in progress. Katniss involuntarily shuddered at the sound. After midnight at the lightning tree and its subsequent events, thunderstorms always made her feel on edge. The anxiety has gotten better over the years, but she needs to be near Peeta during a storm for her own comfort.(Cultivating a War, chapter 7)

&

There was also a little boy, a younger brother, with blond curls and a wide, goofy smile. While he was a sweet child, he wasn't cherished at home. He saw the younger sister trailing behind the older one. It was obvious the sisters loved each other a lot. He wondered what that must be like. (An idea that popped into my head last night, trying to piece it together but I like it so far)

No pressure tags to @dandelionsunset1210 and @mandrake-mistakes

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"She’s not an easy person; she’s like me, Peeta always says." - SOTR, Epilogue

Haymitch would help her!

She would eat us all alive online for ever suggesting he was wrong.

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can’t believe it’s salt air and the rust on your door month already. what’s next? i’m doing better i made it to september? i wake up and it’s october the loss is yours? gray november i’ve been down since july? hey december guess i’m feeling unmoored????

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Victor, Mentor, Mockingjay: Last year, Katniss Everdeen and Peeta Mellark won the 73rd Annual Hunger Games in a dramatic Double Victory. Since then they have done everything to appease President Snow and maintain peace in Panem, going so far as to get engaged. They now must return to the Capital as Mentors in the 74th Annual Hunger Games.

Chapter 14: And Then There Were Two Now Posted!

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welcoming their baby girl

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Sexy thoughts about Everlark tonight: actually they do missionary like most times. Katniss wants to look at that man’s face close and personal.

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I really don't understand how "without getting kudos or comments a fanfiction author is going to assume that people who clicked their fic didn't like it" became a controversial take.

I don't know why some people think an author should imagine, or guess that people who click their fic enjoyed it it when nobody is telling them that.

If you're re-reading a fic constantly, or leaving it up in your tab so that it re-loads every day for a hundred days the author is not going to know that unless you tell them. They'd love to hear it. It would make their day.

And if you don't tell them you liked their fic, there's no reason for them to assume you did.

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interested in knowing what made me lose it today? this little precious scene in mockingjay:

i suddenly want to tell peeta everything about who he is, and who i am, and how we ended up here. but i don’t know how to start. worthless. i’m worthless.

at a few minutes before four, peeta turns to me again. “your favorite color…it’s green?”

“that’s right.” then i think of something to add. “and yours is orange.”

“orange?” he seems unconvinced.

“not bright orange. but soft. like the sunset,” i say. “at least, that’s what you told me once.”

“oh.” he closes his eyes briefly, maybe trying to conjure up that sunset, then nods his head. “thank you.”

but more words tumble out.

“you’re a painter. you’re a baker. you like to sleep with the windows open. you never take sugar in your tea. and you always double-knot your shoelaces.”

then i dive into my tent before i do something stupid like cry.

it's just... it's one of those things were it feels impossible to explain its importance because i mean it's right there. read this passage over and over again and loose your mind because what else is there to do but that. because she loves him. because she sees him. because she wants him. because she hides him away in this special place in her heart reserved for taking notice of him. i'm crying while typing this because imagine!! just imagine for a second what it means for her, for anyone to take these tiny little, seemingly mundane but precious, precious things and catalogue them into their mind. to take care of someone's quirks and habits and routines. to witness someone's existence and deem it important just because it's theirs.

she loves him and it's rare. and it's not even that she knows him in this definitive way, because people are not constants, but that she wants to keep knowing him. he will change and she will change but she's saying: “i will always open a window for you in the night, and prepare your morning tea just how you like it. i will wait for your to fasten your shoelaces. just in case. i will be your witness.” their love is young and at times immature and sometimes they put each others on pedestals but they're only kids who are growing up. it's not perfect but it's honest. it's doesn't stay in one place. it moves. and every step counts. not a single one less important than the one coming after.

but what hurts the most is that without fail, there is always someone doubting whether katniss loved peeta at all. there is always someone saying that she's not enough or that peeta deserved better or maybe she does grow to care for him, with time, after everything they've been through, but solely for that reason and nothing else more.

so i cry and i get upset because how heartbreaking it must be for someone who was always doubted, to be doubted some more. it is never enough. she didn't convince you. how heartbreaking it is that katniss herself thinks that her doubt is a bad ugly thing proving her undeserving of anything good love has to offer her. considering the utter lack of choice she has during the majority of the story she needs to doubt and question and understand herself only when she free to. at the end. but that so many others do is so sad.

and i get it. there is something subtle about the romance here. there is a need for you to read in between the lines, to read carefully and intentionally to be able to “get” it. to see not only what is being said but also what is not. to be the audience that is going to close the book and the think about, be smart about it, come to conclusions themselves without the author spelling it out for you every time. and stories like that don't appeal to everyone. no story does. and my god i know katniss isn't real. i really do. these comments can't hurt her because she doesn't exist. but they hurt me, mostly cause i'm insane, but partly because when you love a love story you're prepared for other not to, but not so much prepared for others to tell you it was never even a love story to begin with.

i'm certain i did not say anything that already hasn't been said but after finishing sunrise on the reaping i seem to be unable to shut up so i can't. or i won't.

and before someone tells me i'm crazy, too sensitive or whatever else. i know. i know i am. it's fine. i've never moved on from anything in my life so this won't be an exception. it's okay.

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ABSOLUTELY! His mother is a laundress/washer woman. Their income relies on them having access to water. So they definitely filled it - and probably filled it a few times - in the month he was gone. I'm sure others in the Seam probably helped them to do so if they needed.

Whoever Snow had set the fire definitely drained the cistern so there was no water to put out the blaze.

I'm not sure Snow knew the detail that it was Haymitch's job to fill it before the reaping. Probably a lovely little bonus for him though, that not only would his family die but that Haymitch would blame himself!

I think - actually I am certain - that Willamae and Sid refilled the cistern after Haymitch left for the games. Who goes without water for a month? I think they filled up the cistern and Snow had it drained to torture Haymitch.

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july 31st