geekydreamy

[geekydreamy]

i don’t think people understand how much of life is grief. not just people dying, but losing the version of yourself you thought you’d become. grieving the city you had to leave. the friends you lost not in argument, but in silence. the summer that will never come back. the feeling that maybe you peaked at 12 when you were reading books under the covers and believing in forever

[geekydreamy]

I still can't fully believe this, but I've opened up a new etsy shop! I can't yet send out physical items, so I focused on digital listings. Here are my first ever embroidery patterns for sale.

[geekydreamy]

Brianna Pastor, Good Grief

[geekydreamy]

so what if I want to have total control over every single thing at all times. just let me lol

[geekydreamy]

the jump from 2015 to 2020 was 10 years but the jump from 2020 to 2025 was 11 months

[geekydreamy]

What is poetry to you ?

There's only so much that can be contained within the confines of human flesh and there comes a point when one needs to bleed in order to let it all out. To me, poetry [writing] is a form of bleeding.

[geekydreamy]

"this is me trying" is actually not a soft sweet thing you say in a calm conversation. it's what you yell when someone tells you to work on your problems and actually try to get better and you're like YOU DON'T GET IT! I'M TRYING! THIS RIGHT HERE, WHERE I KEEP FUCKING UP AGAIN AND AGAIN? THIS IS ME TRYING. I'M JUST FUCKING TERRIBLE AT IT BUT I AM TRYING. REMEMBER WHEN I DIDN'T KILL MYSELF? REMEMBER WHEN I SAID NO TO THE WHISKEY? THOSE WERE TIMES I TRIED! I AM TRYING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[geekydreamy]

mugs by Atesartt

[geekydreamy]

[geekydreamy]

"what groceries u been into recently" is actually a great question, there's a bunch of good conversations inside it

[geekydreamy]

happy pride! please be kind to yourself. never let them win

[geekydreamy]

melanoma

a stylization study of my sunshine

[geekydreamy]

[geekydreamy]

propaganda i am not falling for:

always moving on. some goodbyes need to rot a little. some griefs need to be held in the mouth like a stone.

beauty defined by algorithms. beauty exists in crow feet and smile lines

pretending to be chill. i’m not chill. i care deeply and inconveniently. i read into things. i write poems about eye contact

beige apartments with no soul. give me bookshelves and incense and loud art

sneaky links and unclear intentions. i want devotion. and also clarity

treating books as decor. read them. dog-ear them. argue with them in the margins

[geekydreamy]

I’ve been very busy with drawing my favourite pairings (and randomly Saoirse Ronan)

[geekydreamy]

also a poem from the new, unreleased collection. very possibly my own all-time favourite.

[geekydreamy]

— Mary Lambert, Shame Is an Ocean I Swim Across